Realized In The Middle Of The Theater That I Want To Be A Sexy Symbiote Woman. Get That Purple Lightning

Assuming this hasn't been done yet.

When I was a small child, my dad told me never to swear. It only just now dawned on me that he meant I wasn't allowed to use swear words. I took it like, "I solemnly swear..." and I took it to heart. Any time anyone asked me to do something and told me to swear on it, I would just respond with, "I don't swear, but I promise!"

I still very rarely said swear words as a child (my official number is five times before 18 years of age). I was in high school when accidentally said "dick" for the first time the morning after a sleepover at an abandoned school.

My friends probably wouldn't believe this, but I consider posting something in my friend group's groupchat 20 to 30 times before actually posting it unprompted. I'm not sure if this is normal or anxiety.

I wish I could fall asleep in bed as easily as when I'm trying to do homework on the couch.

Inspired by this tumblr post. based on this twitter post

Ollie's doing her best. (bonus after the jump)

I've been terrified of going insane for a long time now, specifically loss of lucidity/memory. When I was in high school, I would occasionally have minor hallucinations when I wasn't getting enough sleep.

The most afraid I've been in my life was once when I lost access to all my memories for about thirty seconds. I couldn't recall any details about my identity or my whereabouts (my apartment).

I think the second most disturbing experience was years ago when I was in the shower and I thought my hair turned into spider legs. It took every fiber of my being not to freak out and start thrashing my limbs all over the place.

The last time I visited my dad, he described two occasions of having hallucinations similar to ones I've had, so I asked if my family has a history of mental illness. He said his grandmother or something like that "went crazy," so that wasn't very helpful or reassuring.

I think overall, the best thing to do is enjoy life now. Worrying about the future will probably just make it hard to deal with. Eventually I should talk to a therapist, but I'm happy where I am.

I don't know why I feel like I have to be sleep-deprived and listening to loud music in order to be productive.

being a female knight fucking sucks. every squire boy i get turns out to be an adult woman with short hair who's just in it to sensually strap my armor to me. CHOP CHOP bitch the French are trying to sack our castle!

I swear I act identically to the people around me, so why does it feel so uncomfortable?

Hmm, the caves call to me... I wish to be underground.