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Tw Disordered Eating - Blog Posts
Can someone remind me tomorrow that I don’t need to eat so much 🙃 I seriously need to lose weight again
Tomorrow it’s back to restricting. Can’t believe how much my body has changed this past year?!?
Something happened today
Something that made me think.
We went to get food, my friends and I
We went to get food delighted and waiting to buy.
One step closer i get nervous,
Do i really have to eat?
Another step closer,
My heart starts pumping with quickened beats.
We get the food, my friends and I,
One big plate to share amongst us three.
They each grab a spoon and give one to me
They each have a bite and look at me,
Waiting to see if I liked the taste.
Was it always this scary to eat?
Was i always so afraid of their eyes on me?
No, thats not true.
But then whats wrong?
Why can't i eat even though it's what i want?
I stand there awkwardly trying to get a spoonfull
I stand there awkwardly hoping to run away if i could.
In the end I said I didn't want to eat and smiled
In the end , even though I didnt want to I lied.
I thought about it all the way home
And then i thought about it some more.
It makes me sad because I wanted to eat
It makes me mad because I held myself back.
I wanted to be like them when their eyes sparkled at the taste
I wanted to be like them when they ate each bite with no shame on their face.
Im always so ashamed to eat
Even though its a basic need
Im always so ashamed they'd see
And so i hide away behind smiles and a mumbled "Its okay I'm fine"
Something happened today,
Something that made me blink
At the absurdity of my own mind
For making me feel such shame
Over something so small,
Like having a bite.
-scaredofmyvoice
I usually wait till I have atleast a few poems written before I post but this has been on my mind for hours now and I just wanted to let it out.
It's been a rough day guys :<
Lost 3lbs in one week omg!! Im so happy!!
Obviously its easier now because i just relapsed after a year of not caring, so it will inevitably plateau, buttttt im happy for now!!!
I calculated my bmi and dream weight online and if i want to reach it for december i have to eat NOTHING. It literally said "your daily intake to achieve your goal should be 0cal"
LMAO
Remember that 20% of your water intake usually comes from food
If you’re not really eating food, you gotta DRINK 20% more water
Guys. The footlong churros from subway are only 190 CALS. They’ve become like my go-to eating out dessert. They’re so fucking good they actually taste like a real dessert, these are like ana heaven holy shit
♡ Underrated Safe Foods ♡
Hii!! Since my last underrated safe food post blew up so much I thought I’d make a part two to these!
These r gonna be a lot more specific, as I’ll mention a lot of brands here (I’m in the US btw, pretty much all of these can be found at publix)
Quest protein chips - starting strong w these cause oh my god. They have around 20g of protein, 4g net carbs, and 140 cals per bag. The best part is, I cannot lie when I say these are actually SO MUCH better than any greasy calorie dense chip brand. My fav flavor is the chili lime, but there’s also loaded nacho, and the flavoring is so accurate on both!!!!/!!/ get these guys please
Enlighten bars (Sea Salt Caramel) - do you guys like ice cream bars? Do you also like them for only 80 cals?/?/? Yeah. There’s no catch like “it’s actually just frozen breast milk” or sum shit. I have no idea what they put in those things but man are they good, I wouldn’t even care if it was actually frozen breast milk
Raspberries - now you might be thinking “wdym those aren’t underrated everybody has fruit as a safe food” but nobody ever mentions the nutrients. Specifically FIBER. People always ignore fiber in their wl journey but it’s so important. Raspberries are a perfect fiber rich low cal food that you guys NEED to get on.
Kimchi - if you’re not familiar, kimchi (김치) is a korean food which is basically fermented cabbage in liek a sauce…i don’t know what the sauce is iforgot. But anyway, since it centers around cabbage, I think it’s no surprise that these are an amazing low cal option. And the best part is, the fermentation process produces a ton of healthy gut bacteria. It’s a lil bit sour so I personally don’t like it, but my friend does, and maybe that’s why he’s 15 lbs lighter than me
Egg whites - eggs themselves are amazing for wl, but you can enjoy them for a fraction of the cals. Most of the protein is in the whites anyway, so egg whites are genuinely one of the best sources of protein while also being extremely low cal. If you want, you can make your eggs with just one full egg and then mostly egg whites, and I like to sprinkle a little bit of feta in there so life doesn’t suck
Microwaved fiber one brownies - a little bit specific, but why eat your fiber brownie when it’s dryer than this pu-
when you can microwave it for a lil bit, add sum whipped cream (don’t come for me it’s high volume so it’s not actually that many cals) and have basically a hot fudge brownie for under 100 cals. You deserve to feel something every once in a while, and though it might not be the same, the brain fog from fasting will probably hinder your ability to tell the difference
That’s all!! If you guys have any more questions feel free to ask. Hopefully this list will help you diversify your diet, because I can imagine biting into your 3rd cucumber of the day just makes you sad.
does anybody have a working pdf of the chic diet?? All of the pdfs I’m trying say file not found 😭😭
LISTEN UP FOR ALL YOU ANNAS WHO HAVE AN ALL OR NOTHING MINDSET‼️‼️
THE ONES WHO EAT A LIL OVER THEIR LIMIT AND THEN BINGE!!
I think I have a solution to this :3
I’ve always been like this, I do a little bad one day and think “oh well this days ruined, better eat while I can before I have to be good again tomorrow” and it screws me up.
Well I recently came up with a different strategy that’s helped me SO MUCH.
Stop setting a daily limit, set a weekly limit.
A weekly limit is self explanatory, it’s how many calories or certain macros you should eat throughout that whole week
And when you do this, I want you to completely stop thinking of your diet in days, just think of the week.
That way when you eat a lil too much one day, you have NO REASON to binge. Bc all those extra binge cals r just gonna affect your weekly budget…now you have less cals to eat throughout the week.
It also makes you think harder abt your cals, bc with daily limits you only have to worry abt your intake for that one day and then do that a bunch of times, but w the weekly limit you’re constantly thinking of your intake for the past few days, and how eating that extra slice of cake will effect you that week; which makes much more sense when considering long term weight loss.
Another thing you can do is work up towards a cheat day. Basically promise yourself a cheat day at the end of the week with all the cals left on your budget. This will make you wanna save up and restrict more throughout the week, and you might not even use all your leftover cals that day!
To do this is simple, I just multiplied my normal daily limit by 7 and increased it a little to fit those days I might go a little above.
If what you’re doing isn’t working for you, I really recommend you try this! Who knows, it could be really helpful :3
No because I’ve lost so much sense of reality w this ed like I see somebody eat a MEAL. And like HOLY SHIT?? LUCKY?? YOU GET TO DO THAT???
It’s funny how I’ll see crazy ass artificial ingredients on candy and be like “the fuck ew no” and then when I see those same ingredients in Diet Coke I’m like
“… :3”
I’m living y’all’s dream rn
Why has learning a new language been such a good distraction from eating 😭 I spend so much time studying Korean that I don’t really feel as tempted to get something to eat!
If any of y’all r kpop fans you need to start learning the choreos as exercise. I’m serious you won’t even feel like your working out but you are. You’ll wanna keep dancing and you can go for hours not even realizing that you just burnt off hundreds of cals!! It’s so fun
My dms r always open if you guys want sum good choreos to learn 😛
Y’all my dumbass gave in and ate the school food today and I can’t even make this shit up literally what the hell
Breakfast :3
Around 200 kcal cause I only had half of the apple
that black stuff is seaweed btw
Y’all REMEMBER thanksgiving IS a valid day to binge. Quit worrying about it you’ve earned this now go eat eat like 8 apple pies who cares
this shark is so cute
Underrated safe foods <3
Bc I’m tired of just seeing rice cakes and cucumbers
- seaweed (like 25-50 cals a pack cmon this stuff is tew good)
- popsicles (might get a bad rep but I swear these are always under 50 cals and they last so long)
- lollipops (again, bad rep, but they’re even less than popsicles usually and these also last long)
- 0cal water/ice flavorings
- cereal bars (like 100-200 kcals a bar r u kidding me these r the holy grail, plus they’re super sweet and taste great microwaved)
- freeze dried fruit (might be expensive af but literally cured my chip addiction)
- marshmallow/marshmallow fluff (again, call me crazy, but they’re high volume and can serve as a great snack)
- fruit roll-ups (like 60-80 cals for an entire ROLL.)
- plain/low cal popcorn (kinda popular but still needs more rep)
That’s all bye!!!!
Lunch :3
Abt 25 cals
seaweed is one of my fav safe foods <3
sumth I do is whenever there’s tempting food in the pantry I always turn it so that the nutrition label is facing me. Idk why but it helps so much…like I only see food as calories now
hie I’m posting again :3
lil Intro I’m tay I’m a mineral and I have @na
I’ll probably be posting thoughts, tips, motivations, inspi, etc !!
I thought that I was better
I genuinely thought that I was getting better, that I was moving on from my past. That I wasn’t the same 83 pound ball of depression and suicidal thoughts. But now I can realize that recovery isn’t a liner line, it’s a wave that has high highs and low lows. Some days it’s be a high, while others are a low. I may be depressed and doing things I shouldn’t do, but I’m not starving myself and I’m not cutting myself. And for me that’s a win. Yes I’m hurting in other ways, but I’m not bleeding and I’m not skin n bones anymore. I have scars that show I lived and I’m 105.8 pounds now. Technically I’m still in the bmi underweight category but not by much. I’m at a happy weight. And while yes sometimes I forget to eat, and others I say that I don’t deserve to. That’s all a part of my recovery, it might not be how others recover as each and every person handles things differently. All forms of moving forward- yes even the ups and downs- are a valid form of healing and progress. It shows that you are strong and kicking whatever it is that you are facing in the butt.
Sorry that this was so long, I’m on day three of not sleeping and needed to get this out. Good night or good morning, I hope you all have a lovely time. -3rat