Yay For The Hand Getting Better And Glad You're Alright! My Wrist On The Other Hand Hurts And The Curse

Not your division, I guess? And you know me! I know bugs well! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍💯👀✨🥺🥹🥲😳😅☺️😁😉😌👉🏻👈🏻

Hey Greg! Did you know that big dragonflies can speed up to 130 miles per hour??? Cheetah's can also speed up to 130 miles per hour, but only for about 20 seconds, so a big dragonfly can easily beat a cheetah in a race!

Dragonflies can also make it from Lybia to Iceland in only four days flat! Awesome, isn't it?! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍☺️😁😉😌🥳👀💯👉🏻👈🏻

Is this true? I don't know any bugs to confirm these facts with. Feel like I'd need a detective for this. Or someone who really knew bugs. Wonder if I know anyone like that...

Can I use that for roaches as well? 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍🤭😂🤣😅😁☺️😳😉😋🥳👀👉🏻👈🏻

Tumblr seems to do targeted advertisements now. Or maybe that was just a coincidence that they are providing an ad for meat seasoning right after I posted about a cannibal seasoning their meat of choice. "The taste their meat craves" They even got the garlic I just talked about. Very fitting. Meat seasoning for cannibals. How neat. At least we now know the perfect christmas present for any cannibalistic friend you have.

hi again! how would it be if brian and tim get in a polyamory relationship? thank u for your content you are amazing jajhdbsb💖💖💖💖

Total loving goofballs. And iLy- uwu

Poly!Tim & Brian

Tim calls Brian ‘B-man’

And Brian calls Tim ‘Time’ or 'TT’ or his favorite, 'Tim man’.

They’ll come up with dumb nicknames for their s/o too.

Like 'crayons’ bc they have to share you all the time.

Really confuses tf out of other people.

Tim and Brian are smart individually, but dumb as hell when they’re together.

Tim will be the one trying to find a way to carry you both at the same time and probably almost dropping one of you.

And Brian will build pillow forts at midnight.

Sometimes their alters will poke their heads into your relationship.

Hoodie will make everyone pizza rolls and chicken nuggies at 4:00 am when you and Tim are asleep after he’s pulled an all-nighter.

Sometimes you’ll wake up with Masky .3 inches away from your face in the dead of night.

And there are times when Masky and Hoodie take control at the same time and you have to figure how to keep two full-grown men from raiding your fridge and then being questioned later as to who ate their food.

One time you walked into a room and they were locked eyes with each other and did not move for a good fifteen minutes.

Masky and Hoodie never mentioned it, and ofc Tim and Brian don’t remember it.

Surprisingly, Masky and Hoodie and very gentle with you.

Especially Masky who doesn’t quite know his strength and tends to treat you like glass.

Tim and Brian will bicker (lovingly) often over who gets to spend the day with you, which usually ends up with you all lazing around on the couch.

You have to break them apart bc they play wrestle too much with each other.

And with you, of course.

When Tim wrestles, it always ends in a makeout session, and Brian usually ends up dragging you to the couch

Brian’s overprotective of Tim, and Tim is overprotective of you.

It’s rock paper scissors for who sleeps in your bed.

If Brian gets kicked out you’ll wake up to him nudging his way under the blankets and up against your back.

Brian cuddles more than Tim, but Tim has those heartfelt hugs and cuddles uwu

Yay! So were you able to help that anon with his cut off dong, @consult-johnhwatson? Or is that thing free to use as food? Never tried human dick before... 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍🤭😂🤣😁☺️😳😉😋🥳👀👉🏻👈🏻

I just cut my dick off, and it's bleeding a lot... What do I do, doctor?

Uh, cauterize it?

Slender Brothers and Female Beauty Practises Used in the Middle Ages!

What the Slender Brothers thought of beauty practices in Europe during the Middle Ages for Females. Inspired by Haus of Holbein from Six: The Musical XD 

Warnings: Well, Offender’s of course discusses rape so don’t read it if you know its going to make you uncomfortable. As a whole though, they all talk about pretty gross and painful sounding stuff. That’s what the practises for beauty were like at the time. That’s the whole topic. Basically though, if you’re cool watching Horrible Histories then these (Except Offenders) should be okay. 

~~~

Offenderman:

Man, your make-up, wigs and rat fur eyebrows are gonna get wiped off with him. This is not because he’s sloppy… its actually because he doesn’t like the taste. His mouth is gonna find itself in all sorts of places and he doesn’t need to be tasting hog grease on your face, no matter how good for your skin you might think it is! This includes if they used lead for makeup, arsenic, nightshade, lard, or anything else (for this reason, Offender actually avoided much accidental poisoning that way. Of course, this man poisons himself anyway with other drugs). Hair extensions would also go. He did get excited though when he, uh, caught a girl having her late night / before bed routine with blood on her face, though. Like when you get a box of cornflakes and theirs coco pops in there instead.

He was and still is pretty fascinated with corsets though.

Slenderman:

Don’t take this as Slender being ‘ahead of the time’, but the moment he left his forest for a moment and saw women replacing their eyebrows with rat fur and using pee to lighten their hair, he was out of there. No, no. Absolutely not. That’s disgusting and ridiculous. He goes home in disgust and then he laughs his ass off (Cruelly). Like I said, this doesn’t mean Slender was ahead of the time (None of them were or are. They can do their own research, but that can only lead them to be as forward as the rest of the world is- they’re telepathic, not psychic), it just means he was judgmental and thinks the only valid image of beauty is his own. “No Splender I’m not leaving this forest, there are people out there who pluck their hairlines away until they look like what emerges from a hens vagina. With a face.”  

Splenderman:

Splender has been around humans for so long and he pays so much attention (Not out of creepiness- out of care) that he is well aware of the state a human body should be in if it’s healthy and comfortable and how it definitely should not look if it is healthy and comfortable. This means that when people started getting sick and losing the ability to walk too early in life after they started using certain beauty practises, he knew exactly what to blame. And he, of course, tried to warn people when the topic came up and made his views on these things clear to people he knew, these things were kinda… normal?? You know? There wasn’t much he could do. People would just brush him off. Folks always complain about new things, that doesn’t mean they’re bad! Right?

This normalcy barrier though, did not stop our man from being a legit vigilante by night and making sure that various X-Ray clinics (These would be used for hair removal. You got stuck under the X-Ray machine for up to a day and it got rid of your hair… but it also, of course, destroyed your skin) and small cosmetics factories that put arsenic and deadly night shade in their products would shut down. He did this by stealing their equipment and materials and getting rid of it. Splender’s awesome.

Trenderman:

Of course, Trender is a fashion plate and he has always appreciated mortals’ sense of style and art, but he isn’t obsessive about sticking to the trends. He likes to do his own thing, you know? As a rule, he has always backed up his practises with science and his own experience with them, so I’m not gonna lie here. Some of the practises used during the Middle Ages did concern him a bit, aha. Such as the use of radiation for skin care and various poisons (Lead, arsenic, deadly nightshade). He would also take shoes very seriously with anyone he was dressing up for events and have them promise to him that they would excuse themselves from their party or whatever they were attending, for a bit and take off super high heels or too small slippers to let their feet breath and sit normally for a little while. He would go as far as to tell them horror stories about people who didn’t listen to him and couldn’t walk after the age of forty, or got seriously disgusting feet looking feet, or even had to have them chopped off. Yeah, Trender took it seriously.

Using mercury, though (Unfortunately), is not one of the things that concerned him. After the 1800’s, when Trender finally did fall seriously ill from the substance (It took him a while due to his superior immune system), he did of course immediately regret all of his work with it and halted its use in any of his practises. Its one of his biggest regrets. He used to recommend it so often to clients… and friends… and he can’t take any of that back. These days though he’s very current and aware to a genius extent on the subject of what’s healthy in the way of cosmetics. He doesn’t play with it at all.

Exactly! And no other spider can ever replace me I hope!! 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍😉😏😋☺️🤭😁😌🥺🥹😳🙂💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

Would u like a pet cat or something more exotic? A spider perhaps?

I have a Spider already, thanks.

A cat might threaten it.

How would the slender brothers react to somebody going yandere over them? (Mother and Lume included). Maybe reader is this super powerful demon being who wants to love their new obsession. I always love the idea of insanely powerful readers, but dangerously powerful. Life with them is sweet as sugar! Praise, kisses, maybe a bit of jealousy here and there. But punishments are the worst hell imaginable

Slender

Slender pretends not to be intimidated.

He is.

But, to protect his ego, he forces himself into the mindset that he's superior, which is a dangerous game to play around you.

The first time he told you 'no' was quite interesting, and wet the mood for the rest of your short relationship.

"What did you just say to me?"

There was a tense silence, and it lingered in the air between the couple like a dense fog.

Slender slowly turned his head, questioning if the tone he heard was really as audacious as they seemed.

"I said, 'No, I would like to attend a party tonight with my business partners and Offender.'"

"That's what I thought you said."

Slender paused, and he would glare if he had the proper equipment. "You aren't my mother, I don't need to ask permission to leave the house at a reasonable hour."

"Well, we'll just have to find a way for you to stay home then."

"I'm not making up an excuse just-"

And before he could finish the next syllable, six thuds hit the ground. Out of pure primal instinct, Slender teleported somewhere safe inside his forest.

He left your claws immediately, and he'd rather stay that way, even if he must constantly be on the run from you.

Offender

Honestly, as long as you're nice to him, he might not even notice that you're yandere.

He loves attention, physical affection, praise, and sappy romance in general.

And you could kill him in one swipe??? That's sexy. He's already praising the ground you walk on.

He's always head over heels for people that are taller than him, considering it's extremely rare.

Sometimes a big guy like him just wants to be the little spoon, y'know?

But it will be difficult when Offender tries setting boundaries.

He's a man that has a big social circle, and if that is a problem for his dangerous yandere, he's going to be in for a hell of a ride.

After the first punishment, he realizes you're fucking insane and he needs to get out of there as soon as possible.

As a trade negotiator for Slender, he has a lot of connections, possibly beings that would be able to shelter him if need be.

He never learns his lesson, "The crazy ones are always the hottest."

Trender

He's not much of a fighter.

Trender would rather take the easy route and let you follow him around like a rabid puppy dog.

If you start complimenting him and giving praise, Trender will fluster to unimaginable limits.

And he hates to admit it, but he really loves the positive attention you give him.

He's so used to being unrecognized for his hard work in the small friend circle he has, it feels pleasant to have some pats on the back once in a while.

And he's a very passive being as well, you won't have to worry about him talking to other people or disobeying your wishes. He's just has a huge passive personality that likes to avoid conflict with the ones close to him.

Unless you're referencing his work.

If you try to control his work, his best stress outlet, then you're going to have an equally hard time punishing him as he's being disciplined.

He's stubborn just like his Mother, but he's also a huge baby when it comes to pain and discomfort.

He hates it, and promises to listen if you stop. But once the situation arises again, the exact same scenario plays out.

He'll try to escape from your claws as soon as possible if similar events keep happening.

Splendor

He thinks you adorable! And the both of you are sickeningly sweet together.

Splendor has a dark side as well.

He can be sweet as sugar one moment, and break your arm the next if he would really like to.

Splendor understands what it's like to be twisted in that sense, a terrible curse that's uncontrollable.

Chances are, he's willing to work through it with you, yandere or not, and work towards a healthy relationship.

Splendor falls hard when he's in love, and he'll do anything in his ability to mend your relationship.

Every couple has their bumps in the road.

Some couples argue, some sleep in different beds, some rip the bells off of a tendril because their partner spent too much time away from home.

But! Anything can be fixed with a little bit of love and duct tape! Splendor is sure of it. And he's convinced deep down you're the sweetest being in the Underrealm. You just need a little help discovering yourself.

This is one VERY GERGEOUS girl! 🕷️❤️✨

hearsey's owl moth (brahmaea hearseyi) | ofmoth_andflame on ig

While on the singing topic can you do hc/scenarios of Slender raising his child figure (maybe they became a father/child duo from being a mansion resident for so long) with singing or piano lessons bc I imagine him being so old he that he would teach her a “proper” hobby that’s been around for centuries. Sorry if this doesn’t make sense but I love the way you write cp characters😭

I went with piano~ I hope you like it~

It happens quite often that when they aren't working that the residents of the mansion will get bored, and as the father figure of the mansion, he likes to do what he can to get them interested in new hobbies and activities.

When he finds you wandering around his music room one day, utterly bored, he can't help but offer to teach you how to play something. When you say you've always wanted to learn piano, he's quite excited, and he pulls you over to the piano and sits you next to him, beginning to explain the basics.

The two of you end up meeting a few times a week to continue your piano lessons, and you begin looking forward to them. He's a very kind and patient teacher, and he's always finding something new to teach you about music.

As you begin getting better, it's also common for some of the other creeps to sit in and listen to you as you practice your piano melodies. Slender is just so proud of how good you've become, and he praises you frequently for your skills. Eventually, he begins performing duets with you on the piano, and the two of you have such a fun time together.

NSFW Jeff?

I tried not to say the obvious things (ex. blood play, knife play stuff like that). Also! I forgot to make this gender neutral, but I’ll gladly write one for male!~ 

Jeff

Not too long tbh,

But boi is pACKing some girth

Average sized boi

Continuous stabbing motions is surprisingly a good body work out

So his torso and arms are nicely toned under that hoodie

He usually uses sex as a stress relief so expect some hate-fucking and roughness from time to time

Has a dominating kink, but doesn’t mind being pinned down once in a while.

And maybe a daddy kink shhh

Lick the knife and immediate boner

Not a fan of foreplay

just wants to get into it

But if you want it, he’ll kiss your neck and finger you until you’re ready

Cannot find the g-spot

Even if you show him

But!! He does know where the clit is

Surprisingly good at giving oral

He’s got a NICE tongue

He’ll work wonders eating you out

And if you grab his hair and buck you hips against his mouth

His already hard cock will fucking twitch and throb

He’ll pull your hips closer and hold you down while you squirm

While fucking you tho?

A wild animal, to say the least.

As mentioned earlier, he likes it rough.

He’ll start slow and gather speed to find a pace that he likes.

Which is 214492e miles per hour

He might not be able to find your g-spot, bUT hIS DICK CAN!

He knows the perfect angle but he has to be hella hard for it to work

Will bite your neck and leave hickeys wherever he can

He gets turned on by pain, giving and recieving, so expect that.

Yank his hair, rake your nails up his back, hold his own knife to his throat and he may just cum from that alone

He wildin’ asf

He’ll choke you and watch as your hands grasp at his arm with that FUckINg LOok on your face

He’ll cut you up if you let him, marking you as his

His neck is sensitive so kiss and bite that area,

Also if you put anything sharp to his neck he’ll get this dumbass grin on his face