While On The Singing Topic Can You Do Hc/scenarios Of Slender Raising His Child Figure (maybe They Became

To describe him in Aziraphale's words: Greeeaaat, bug bogger!

...Should I be worried? 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍😇🙂🥺🥹🤨😳😉😌☺️😅😂🤣✨💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

merry crimemas, what crime are you planning on committing?

sodomy

Damn right, they do! 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍✨💯😂🤣🤤😏😁🤭😋😌😉☺️🙂👀👉🏻👈🏻

The best booty calls have 8 legs.

Yay! So were you able to help that anon with his cut off dong, @consult-johnhwatson? Or is that thing free to use as food? Never tried human dick before... 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍🤭😂🤣😁☺️😳😉😋🥳👀👉🏻👈🏻

I just cut my dick off, and it's bleeding a lot... What do I do, doctor?

Uh, cauterize it?

Cute

Lestrade! My goodness, it's been so long! It's very nice to see you again and have you back here on Tumblr! How have you been in the meantime? And thank you for the compliment! I appreciate that! 🕷️❤️🥰😍😘☺️😉😌😁🥳🤭🥹🥺✨👉🏻👈🏻

Eurus is smarter then both Sherlock and Mycroft combined! 🕷️❤️😍🥰😘😌👀😉🤣😂😁💯👉🏻👈🏻

These pinchers actually also have a use in mating, or better phrased, to attract females. The more well-formed the pinchers are and the more they align, the more beautiful the male is and the more attractive the male is to the female.

What Do Earwigs Do With Those Pincers Anyway? | Deep Look

Earwigs are equipped with some pretty imposing pincers on their rear, and they're not afraid to use them. But when it comes to these appendages, size isn't everything.

Do you have any slender brothers hcs? I absolutely LOVE your blog 💖💖✨

omg i have so many it can probably be a series?? I have years of this pent up LmAO-Ty for coming to my ted talk.

General

Slender is the oldest, followed by Offender, Trender and then Splendor.

Their Mother, who is dubbed Mother, wasn’t around a lot because she was always busy with work and her proxies.

Her proxies didn’t know wtf to do most of the time.

Once they thought they had one under control, two others were trying to sacrifice the youngest (Splendor).

Their skin is so s m o o t h?

Like of like leather texture but s m o o t h and c l e a r

And it kind of sparkles sometimes, especially Slender’s.

Mother usually stops by to check in on her boys at the Manor. She tends to the proxies very well like her own grandchildren.

All of them have different fathers because they either fucking die or ghost her.

Slender

Slender had to half raise most of his brothers.

This is why he’s so well will the folks at the manor in discipline.

He’s the most respectful out of the bunch and tries his best not to offend anyone.

Splendor is his favorite brother but shh don’t tell anyone.

When he’s down, Splendor always tends to find him and cheer him up no matter the situation.

Slender has always had beef with Jeff, maybe it’s because Jeff tried to kill him when offering to take him in.

And then when Slender left him there in the forest, he came crawling to the manor.

He has favoritism towards the proxies, and they tend to get away with things a lot more than they should.

After handing over their will to Slender, Masky and Hoodie made excellent proxies in his opinion. But Toby was the easiest to manipulate.

He gets his power and energy from the souls either he reaps himself, or that the proxies or folks in the manor kill. The souls kind of stick around for a few hours their murderer kills them, so he set up a curfew for killing sprees.

That’s kind of their rent.

Offender

Bad boi™ in his teenage years,

One of the reasons he got all of the *cough* experience he has.

He snuck out of the house constantly when he was a kid.

And sometimes Trender or Splendor tagged along.

He got into alot of trouble when he was both a kid a teenager, and he started shaping up when he reached his adult years because he saw how Trender was starting to take after him.

He goes to bars, usually, to lure in someone lucky for the night.

He gets most of his power and energy from pleasuring people.

Due to that, he’s never assaulted anyone.

Has the longest tongue out of all the brothers, don’t ask how they know that.

He’s non-committal, and get’s anxious when he stays with one s/o for too long because he knows he’s going to outlive them one day. But, if he does find a way to either turn himself human, or turn them immortal, he’d change his life for them.

Trender

He likes his human form better than his original when he goes out.

It means more hairstyle options, make-up and all of that fun stuff.

His room is chaotically organized. If you move something in the mess, he will know.

His room consists of mannequins, small scraps of cloth he refuses to throw away, various loose (DANGerOUs!!) sewing needles, and just random things he find in thrift stores.

He goes thrift shopping to challenge himself to make it into some good and new, and then completely forgets about it/is too lazy to do it.

Kind of whiney like Offender. Also extremely lazy. He just wants to sit in his room all day and watch Netflix or youtube and draw or sew.

There are days where he gets inspiration and actually makes something from scratch, which usually turns out amazing.

Then he gets some dumbass idea like high heeled crocs.

He has an emo/goth phase when it was cool and the rest of his brothers despised him during that era.

He still cringes about it to this day. And Offender does well in reminding him.

He’s so good at makeup and just art in general. He once spent a few hours on Jane and she was able to walk around without her mask. You couldn’t even tell that Jeff had touched her. She cried (both happy and sad) for a good three days after that.

Splendor

Babey boi™

Splendor is half-human, causing Slender not to like him when he first arrived. But he grew on him, much like all small children.

He has freckles!!

His eyes!! Are!! The!! Prettiest!!!!!!!!

They’re pitch black but they have glitter/star-like sparkles in them. And they twinkle!!

Ironically, Splendor is the strongest (and scariest) out of all 4 of them when prompted. He’s just too happy all of the time to let his anger get the best of him.

He carries glitter in his pockets. Not just because of “uwu” glitter, but he’s kind of influenced by Offenders little shit personality and throws it at people to piss them off.

When he was 6, Slender was getting his first job and colored his tie rainbow polka dot. Slender was this ll close to chucking him out the window.

He doesn’t know what he’s doing most of the time, but he’s just happy to be there.

His arms start off white at the shoulder and fade into black just above his elbow.

He has claws!! They’re usually painted by Trender or Sally.

Goodness gracious, why...?! And if I msy be allowed to also give one of my own headcannons, I'd kind of say that Umbitch forces her student to wear pink when ever not in class. And on Wendesdays probably... But again, WHY?!

Hey! I know you're most likely gonna hate me for even thinking about asking that, but couple I maybe request a big bunch of your best headcannons about Professor Umbridge going full on yandere over onne of her female students??? Thanks in advance!

*blinks*

Okay, first of all, for anyone out there: I'm OLD and I live under a rock

Face reveal v

I had to google what yandere meant..... help

With that said, I– I just– w-why???

I don't even know what to tell you or what to make of this because my brain is physically unable to produce any sort of Umbridge headcanons so I don't know where to find you "a big bunch" of them

What comes to mind for now is the following:

She would give her student an ungodly amounts of useless gifts, like a collection of cat-themed stationery

She would build a shrine in a corner of her office with way too many shades of pink, tea cozies with the student’s face on them, framed photos of her and cuts from "The Daily Prophet", also singing kitten in moving portraits that would meow the student's name like a mantra

She would punish the other students for stupid stuff of course and the sanctions would be extreme with like a quill that writes "I must not covet what is hers" or "stay away from [student's name]" into their skin

She would have no scrupules using Imperio to hurt those who try to interact with her favourite student or punish her if she tried to have any sort of relationship, even platonic with someone else

She would implement rules at Hogwarts that would ensure she could spend time with her student

Also, she would rearrange schedules every day

She would come to Quidditch matches with huge banners with ridiculous slogans to encourage her student, and she would force the students she tolerates most to be part of a fan club to cheer during the matches (but not too much, otherwise she would feel threatened and severely punish them)

Apart from that, I'm sorry but nothing comes to mind because whaaaat 😭

Do you have any headcannons for slender?

Sure do~

Slenderman Headcanons: 

He should be considered a mafia boss with the number of people working for him.

But he's more accurately like a father with a bunch of children he hires to do work.

He's in charge of the entirety of the manor. What jobs are coming in, who does them, financial stability, electricity, water, medical needs, house repairs, etc.

In the Underworld, the mansion would be considered a business, and Slenderman is the CEO of said business. He recruits all of the residents in the mansion and they then form a sort of contract with him. This gives them immortality for the duration of the contract, grants them disguises when in the human world for reasons other than work, and it grants them room and board at the mansion.

He can project his voice outside normally, although if he needs to have a private conversation with someone he can do it inside their mind. He tries not to do this too often as he views it as an invasion of privacy.

He tries to maintain a personal level with all the residents of the mansion to make sure relationships amongst them are going well and nobody is getting too depressed, too dangerous, too angry. He likes to look out for them.

He thoroughly enjoys reading as his favorite hobby. In the mansion he has a huge library in the center of it that's several stories and has just about every book you can think of. He collects medical ones sometimes for EJ, some manga for BEN, or some YA novels for the younger creeps. One time Jane and Natalie got him into a few different YA romance novels and even though it wasn't his normal taste he got pretty into them and they talked about them over tea. This sparked a weekly book club that any of the residents can partake in.

He's also quite fond of poetry, and he even writes his own. He has that stored in the library as well although it's in a hidden section only a few people can access.

King of the kitchen. He can make just about any dish you could think to want. Being alive for so long grants you lots of time to experiment and try different foods. 

Loves gardening and has a huge garden that circles the entirety of the mansion. He takes an extreme amount of pride in it and thinks any residence isn't complete without some flowers. He is very protective of it and only allows a select few to manage it, Toby is one of them as it puts him to work and he too values flowers and nature.