Me: *internally To The Alien Mind* NO! MY DOGS ARE NOT FOOD!!!!

". . . Well that's kinda a dumb rule" "I KNOW RIGHT?!" "So.... can I still come cause like..... I've watched a lot of cartoons as a kid so I wanna whack someone with a mallet. It's actually on my bucket list of questionable things I wanna do." "Your what now?"

You were summoned to a fantasy world. As you are eager to begin your new life as the hero, the summoner explains: "Actually, our party already has one. In fact, you're only here because we need a human member in order for us to be officially recognized as a hero's party."

Me: I'm heading out! I'm making sure this kid is happy! My minon: But boss! The heroes! Me: They can go fuck themselves! I bet so many heroes denided seeing this little kid so now they have to ask a villain! and if the child doesn't have parents, get the adoption papers ready!

You are one of the most dangerous villain in the world of heroes, also known as The Death. One day you received a letter from Make-A-Wish requesting you to visit a sick child.

Here's another boob fact! They get bigger when you're pregnant!

BOOB FACTS

Lopsided boobs are completely natural! in other words the left boob isn't always the same size as the right boob, this is completely normal and you are beautiful

that's actually the only boob fact I have so far I'm trans sorry I'm new to this

Reblogging cause YOU HAVE TO FUCKING REBLOG! NOT REPOST

Based on actual events

yo gang ur likes r public (i dont really care just. yk 👍)

Just fixed it! And I swear to fucking god if you say anything about what you saw I will tell everyone in the girl's locker room you simp for fiction characters...... LOVE YOU BESTIE >30

That moment was a moment of stupidity actually

homoeroticism

Well it takes a human to kill a human! Let's just hope we know enough facts to scare the Emperor off his throne!!!

You have been Isekai-ed! Isn't that great? Except when you look around you, you see those who summoned you are horrified. Apparently they are the "subhuman" resistance group of Elves, Dwarves, and Beastkins who tried to summon a hero from another world to defeat the evil tyrant human Emperor.

This is beautiful.... T0T

Me: Cause I like fucking with people

You are stuck in a time loop, but you have no intention of ever breaking out of it. After literally millions of resets a new person appears in the loop and asks you why you are still in the loop.

We know for a fact he'd wear it and think it's awesome...

No thoughts. Just Ryusui in an outfit with hip holes

Not exactly what I had in mind but the vision is there. I just need the hip holes 🧍‍♀️