Writing Prompts, family discussions, random bits of my life, short stories and dog pics!!!
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Latest Posts by elvesandlanterns - Page 9
Writing Prompt
Imagine elves have no concept of food poisoning? - Except for like literal poison!
Bard retching, sweaty, face red and making the most pitiful of noises.
Thranduil running out of the room: Get a healer!
Singrid popping her head in and taking one look at her dad: Oh no need he’s fine!
Thranduil: Even so we should still...
Singrid: He’s fine he just has food poisoning again.
Thranduil: Poisoning! .... AGAIN!!!!!
Writing Prompt
Imagine elves don’t know what sunburns are?
Bard, red itchy and peeling skin off: Ow!
Thranduil: Wtf Bard? A-a-are you molting?!!!
Bard: What no?? I just have a sunburn.
Thranduil: The sun... burns you....
Thranduil remembering elves are essentially stars and that he’s touched Bard before: oh no
Writing Prompt
Elrond misunderstands a cultural story dear to Lindirs heart and ends up gifting Lindir a chicken.
Lindir accepts the chicken thinking it’s a part of Elronds culture.
Comedy ensues.
Lindir discreetly try’s to get rid of the chicken by saying that the chicken should get to live with other chickens- Elrond buys him a second chicken.
Just finished reading “Tiny Minstrels” on AO3!!! I loved it!!!
Does anyone know other fanfics where elves (or any other race) react to music?
Leave the tittle below if you do- I would love to read them! THANK-YOU IN ADVANCE :)
Writing Prompt
Elronds reaction to the story of Cassandra and Apollo.
Just think of how hard that would hit Elrond.
Bonus points if it’s a child telling him the story. (Don’t know why but I love the whole child telling a profound story to the adult thing).
If anyone uses this please link it in the comments- I would love to read it!!! ❤️
Victorian Sensibility #2
Elrond doesn’t tell Lindir to change - why should he? This is fine, and ethier way Lindir should be able to wear whatever he wants.
Even if other elves are staring at Lindir the same way he is.
It made him feel red and ends with him glaring down any would be sutors- gods he was acting like a child. He knew that, he didn’t need Erestor to nod dissapovingly at him like that!
As soon as everyone was out of earshot Erestor glanced over at Elrond, “You know this really isn’t fair to Lindir.”
The bottom of his stomach dropped.
Victorian sensibility
Elrond knew he shouldn’t stare - he shouldn’t be taking advantage of Lindir like this!
Lindir’s new outfit was something else, a perfect blue that hugged his small waist and fell short of covering his ...ankles.
So everyone knows the hobbits grand discriptions of food- but like can you imagine middle earth experiencing food of other cultures?
Not just each races food (though that would be great) but that of our own earths cultures!
Imagine elves using chopsticks (and messing up the first time!) or hobbits eating tacos or or anything really!!!
Just reactions to food they have never experienced before!!!
Writing Prompt
Elves don’t get headaches- but Elrond is half man so...
The elves in Rivendell walking on eggshells whenever Elrond complains that his head hurts.
Lindir babying Elrond whenever he has a bad headache. Cutting his food, organizing his paperwork, making sure everyone keeps quite, playing soothing songs Ect.
Elrond secretly loves it.
Family Discussions
We have already broken several rules.
Family Discussions
My sister has decided to make rules for Thanksgiving since we will be having it at her house for the first time.
There’s typical stuff: no politics, no fighting, no Black Friday shopping, make food on time ectra. And then there’s stuff that makes me rethink our family dinamics :
No talking about lawn culture.
No putting the cats on high places.
No chair stacking.
No sleeping on the floor.
No fighting over the whip cream.
Update: the word cloaca is banned.
No debating whether it’s said Mario or Mario.
No talking about ships especially Tolkien ones.
No “pretending” to turn dinner into an intervention. - Again.
Family Discussions
Bilbo talking to Thorin while he’s dying on Ravenhill.
BFF (crying): kiss him !!! He’s dying kiss him!!!
Me: which character are you talking to
BFF: both! Neither! I don’t know!!!
Family Discussions
BFF: I still can’t get over Thorin kicking the dwarves during the troll incident
Me: yeah it was his turn with the brain cell
BFF: oh that’s why you like the dwarves so much theyre dumb !!!
Me (getting ready to refute it - remembers what happens later): okay you got me
Family discussions
Sister : huh (her dog) didn’t even bark at (brothers best friend) Tyler
Me: that’s because Tyler isn’t a threat
Tyler: hey
Brother: true
Family Discussions
Sister: I’m hungry
Mom: do you want a coffee Maria’s coming in a bit
Me: which Maria ?
Sister: the one that makes tamales which Maria do you think?
Me: the one I like
Sister: that’s cold woman
Me: we don’t even know her
Sister : she makes food I don’t need to know her!!!
Family Discussions
Damian :(random scream on the other side of the house)
Jason: was that a scream of happiness or agony
Tim(not looking up from hisphone): both
Family Discussions
BFF: Elrond is such a dad, does he have children?
Me: oh hoho he has children
BFF: who’s his spouse
Me : oh you won’t see her she already went to Valinor (explains what that is)
BFF: oh so are they divorced or do they like exchange letters?
...
BFF: What about Galadriel does she have kids?
Me: Galadriel is Elronds mother in law
BFF: wait what!!!! How!!?!?!
Family Discussions
Second hobbit movie - Laketown scene
BFF: Are those pugs?!?? What are pugs doing here!! Are there pugs in the book?
Family Discussions
After watching the first hobbit movie
Me: Elrond has the patience of a saint
BFF : yeah but I somehow feel like Lindir has to put up with more bs
Me(internally): she understands
Family Discussions
BFF: so does Galadriel show up in the Hobbit
Me: wait for it
(A minute after pressing play Galadriel shows up)
BFF: wwhhhhhaaattttt ?!?!??
Family Discussions
Scene where Elronds company arrives and surrounds the dwarfs.
BFF: that’s just the medevil equivalent of a motorcycle gang surrounding people and circling them
Family Discussions
I’m finally introducing my BFF to the hobbit - my next posts will be the wierd stuff she says during the movies
You know for posterity
Balin: So this is how the great king Thandruil acts in defeat? Disgraceful. Even in exile, my nephew is more honorable than you. Thanks again for the tea. It was delicious. [Balin and Thorin leave]
Thorin: Did you really mean that uncle?
Balin: Of course I told you ginseng tea is my favorite.
*note: I was originally going to do this between Thorin and fili but I honestly can’t imagine Thorin being as calm as Iroh
*sister sons or nephew?
When Elrond and Lindir finally got together no one even thought about giving Lindir “the shovel talk”. Meanwhile Elrond can’t seem to catch a break!
Wherein minstrels, a hobbit and his own family decide to give Elrond “the talk” now if only any of them had communicated this to each other!
(Lindir has a surprising number of friends.)
Family Discussions-
Me (shows up to my best friends house) : oh no ones here
(proceeds to eat all of their bananas and cleans their kitchen)
An hour later
Best friend: hey I’m back! You didn’t have to clean!
Me: I know I don’t have to do anything! I do what I want!!!
Best friend (walks to the dinning room)
...
Best friend: Did you eat all the bananas ?!?!?
Me: I told you I do what I want!!!!
Family Discussions-
Big Sis: why do you call everyone “baby” but be?
Me: I call you a baby all the time
Big Sis: when?
Me: usually when I’m insulting you
Family Discussion-
Jason: Hey baby!
Damian: ewww don’t call me that
Jason: Dick literally calls you that all the time!
Damian: that’s different he calls everyone that
Dick (walks in and pats Tim): hi baby! Hey have you guys seen my new baby?
Them: You’ve had Tim for years?
Dick: I meant my new succulent
Family Discussions-
Me: shut up 3’s an 11 is speaking!
Little Bro: you think we’re 3’s?!?! 😧
(I love that he was more concerned over me calling them 3’s than over the fact that I called myself an 11. Like yeah I’m great but so are they.)
Lindir (signing up for the Musican Guild and being a nervous mess): Can I bring a friend during tryouts?
Elf in charge: Of course! After all it looks like you need all the emotional support you can get!
Next Day -
Elf in charge: Lord Elrond are you here to evaluate the tryouts ?
Elrond (sitting in the front row): Oh no I’m just here for my friend.
Elf in charge (expecting someone really important): who?
Elrond: Lindir
Elf in charge: Wait What?!?!
Lindir (goes on stage)
Elrond: Your doing great sweetie!!!