So Everyone Knows The Hobbits Grand Discriptions Of Food- But Like Can You Imagine Middle Earth Experiencing

Family Discussions

Bilbo talking to Thorin while he’s dying on Ravenhill.

BFF (crying): kiss him !!! He’s dying kiss him!!!

Me: which character are you talking to

BFF: both! Neither! I don’t know!!!

Ghost helpline chapter 37

Jason couldnt help but give his entire family the side eye. Seriously Bruce? A family dinner? Family dinner with thier nieghbors?? That he has a crush on ???!!! Pppfff oh yeah this was going to work out swimmingly. Whatever.

Jason didn’t know why he felt so knotted up inside about the whole thing. It’s not like they were going to find anything and “Brucie” has had plenty of guests over before. And yet Jason felt snubbed, Bruce knew Jason wouldnt be able to join in. He was still legally dead and couldnt just pop into joint family dinner like “oh yeah I got better dont worry about it”. No Jason would need to steer clear of the mannor all together.

Meanwhile his siblings would get to tease dad about his crush, grill the Masters family and talk to Damiens new friend. Because seriously Damian making friends, with a normal girl? Just wow. Good for the kid, because he defiantly hadn’t learn that from Bruce he scoffed for fucking hells sake even Vad had a sketchy criminal history on his buisness Dalv co.

It stung, it was so fucking stupid but it stung. Why didn’t Jason get to be there. Why didn’t he get to shovel talk Bruce’s crush, eat Alfred’s food, sit around awkwardly, and tease Damian relentlessly?

Jason knew why. He did. Logically Jason knew it wasn’t an attack on him. That Bruce hadn’t purposefully done things this way to exclude him. That he was/n’t an embarrassment, dangerous and unwanted to meet Bruce’s new crush because he couldnt be trusted. It wasn’t personal, it’s not personal.

Beep beep

Jason glanced down to his burner phone and grinned manically at the photo of the skunk haired man he’d been tracking strolling into a warehouse… ..with someone young and pink on their arm. Jasons stomach rolled in disgust at the age difference, “Well hello misplaced aggression.”

——

Damian had been hanging around the Masters manor regardless of fathers …complications of the heart. He and Violet needed to plan a strategy of course. The plan had to be seem-less to even stand a chance of working. A part of that involved English lessons which thankfully doubled as a cover. Damian huffed to himself as Violet failed to write neatly again. It was odd to watch, she could speak with a fair sense of clarity and understood difficult concepts when spoken to but written language seemed to illude her. It was frustrating to watch, her hands moved wrong twisting against the pencils and often snapping them. Damian watched as her hand seemed to twitch uncomfortably as she finished.

“You’re bad at this.”

“Gee thanks I had no idea.”

“Tt. It’s ridiculous anyone as old as you should know how to read and write at a higher level than a sixth grader.” Damian felt his hand fall down his face, “You text just fine though, your horrid grammar aside.” Meaning a big part of the problem was physical….now that he thought about it … he hadn’t seen Violet without her human disguise despite already knowing her secret. Both forms had gloves. There’s something else going on here.

The assassin felt ice at his back.

“Let me see your hand.”

That coldness remained as a small warmth was thrown against his chest as she unthinkingly shoved her hand in his face and ate away at her sugary processed snack- dirtying her practice writing paper further.

Taking off her gloves gave sight to three short claws black from tip to knuckle, two fingers incased in a familiar metal. He hadn’t expected it at all, was Violet allowing him to see this purposefully? A limitation of her glamor? A benefit of their bond?

Beep beep

Damian dropped the others hand to glance at the text. Father did what!?

“What do you enjoy eating?” What do demons even eat? Can demons be vegans? She does look a tad like a ram.

“Red and dad make the best cakes!!!”

“Tt. I meant real food, and I’m sure you will change you mind at tomorrows dinner. Alfred’s desserts are superior to all else.” He planned to ignore her millionth mention of “Red”, she was beyond obsessed and he was not falling for the bait… again. Ugh.

Violet stilled, “Oh are you staying for dinner tomorrow.”

“No it would seems our fathers have gotten it into their minds to bring us all into their nonsense.” Damian huffed.

Violet groaned, “Uhhh nooo I don’t want to.”

“Yes well as detestable as it will be -“

“Not that I just, I don’t like eating in front of humans.”

A delicate eyebrow rose at the statement.

“This isn’t “real food”, human food isn’t my food.” Blood guts crunching on a heart like an apple, wide green eyes staring at her horrified. Scared.

Damian thought about it more. Pencils breaking, the way her hands shook and holding a fork was probably difficult for her?

“So what do you consider food to you?”

“Anything.”

“Violet.”

“Anything I’m a scavenger demon …” her eyes rolling at the look on his face, “Tendons, bone, eyes, decorative flowers and overgrown weeds. You could say we are real … vultures.” She chuckled at her inside joke.

The way she spit out the term “scavenger demon” had him reeling a-bit. There was an obvious issue there… somewhere. Fear slithered threw the bond unwillingly, self deprecating and shallow. He at least understood this feeling well.

The feeling that screamed :

Don’t look at me. Don’t look at me like /that/.

Well he supposed he at least knew a good dish to have made for her. Hopefully Alfred wouldn’t mind a change in the menu.

—- —— —-

Bruce was NOT freaking out he wasn’t! And he will deny it forever. He just really wanted this to go well. He needed this to go well.

And he loves his children deeply! But sometimes they could all be a bit much….

At… family dinners. They yelled and fought and they were all fairly high strung but the Masters weren’t like them half of them looked like a strong breeze could knock them over dear lord….

“Bruce!”

“Bruce.”

“B!”

“Ow!!”

….please just, just don’t fight in front of Vlad.

—- —- ——

The triplets, sans Ziyad, positively swarmed their fathers closet. This was going to be great!

Klarion and Billy looked over at Dandy’s murderous face, this was going to be awful.

I love how as a society we have all agreed that if a character dies and comes back to life they’re hair is gonna turn white :)

Examples

Jason Todd (DC Batman)

Danny Phantom

Wilbur and Tommy (Dream Smp)

Shiro (Voltron)

Geralt (Witcher .... I dunno probably??)

Yue (Avatar the last Airbender )

Gandalf ( Lord of the rings - literally goes from grey to white )

Jack Frost (Rise of the Guardians)

Darth Vader (pre 2004 goes from bald to white hair “Force Ghost”)

I’m probably missing some...... hhhmmmm

Ghost Helpline part 17 - Aftermath

Violet spends the next week stuck inside. It wasn’t bad. Dad washed, clothed and feed her teleportation sickness away. She sleeps in his bed and he sends her to sleep with fairytales. Violet doesn’t know what she’s supposed to learn from these stories, it’s nice tho.

Violet doesn’t remember being a baby, maybe she never was one? This softness with her new dad leaves her wanting. Violet would like to beige that if she ever was a baby that she had been held like this - as if she was something precious.

Funny enough her bed rest has her brothers divided. Violet lies about and blames it all on a summoning gone wrong. Brad doesn’t correct her.

It leaves half of her brothers to tiptoe around her as if she’s going to go feral at any moment. The other half yell, they’re angry. Konstelacio isn’t sure which she hates more.

Brad shuts himself away from everyone except Chad and Ziyad.

Billy hugs her and tells her everything about his mission. Almost everything he dances around something. Something important, he calls Batman a dick twice. It makes her feel better about lying.

Klarion gives her an amulet and drags Charles over to tell her about their night out.

Dandy … Dandy doesn’t take it well.

“SOMEONE should have been with her!”

“Brad SHOULD have called me!”

“We should be HOME! Not here with all these these … !”

“You know how I feel about humans.”

Every days another fight.

Konstelacio sneaks out the window.

—- —- —-

It’s been a week since the commotion on the Watch Tower. Six days since they started developing an injectable cure for Vampires Fog. Five days since his talk with Tim. Four days since his kids have begun to mercilessly tease him over more frequent phone use. Three days since he read Nightwings report on the pink vampire. Two days since Constantine had contacted him with an update. They had some more info. One day since he called Clark asking him to schedule a JL meeting.

Six hours thirty two minutes and 54 seconds since Vlad last texted him.

Bruce debated sending him another cat meme to hurry up the process.

He knew he shouldn’t be worried, apparently his only daughter had gotten the flu. And much like Tim, when they got sick they got really sick.

Bruce sent him- her- them! Bruce sent them flowers. Hopefully she would get better soon. It was painfully obvious that Vlad loved his children and her getting sick had him stressing out.

Bruce debated inviting the Masters family over for dinner.

The kids would bully him relentlessly.

Alfred would love it.

—- —— ——

The entire week has been strange to Damian. For some reason his father has been texting the head of their new neighbors relentlessly, much to his sibling’s amusement. Damian doesn’t understand why father and him suddenly “need” friends. The whole act was a waste of time, Jon was enough friendship he needed anyway.

Damian stalked into the backyards tree line. Today was good day to paint damian thought as he set up his easel. Just a sunny quiet day with no distractions.

Wwhhhooossshhhh!

That, that was probably just some animal on the property. It wasn’t uncommon to see bunnies or cats skittering around the areas of estate that still resembled a forest.

Wwwwhhhhoooshhhh!

Damian followed the sound deeper into the tree line.

Wwwhhhossh!

That didn’t sound like an animal anymore. If anything it sounded like it was coming from above…?

Damian turned his head towards the sky.

It was just a girl. How disappointing, Damian had hoped to find a big cat.

She was sitting on a tree branch, swinging her legs like she had no trouble in the world. Tch- she probably doesn’t. No doubt she’s one of his new neighbors.

Wait … hadn’t she been sick recently? What was she doing out here? What was she thinking climbing that high?!

“Oi! Imbecile what are you thinking? Get down from there! “

Her head whipped around to face him.

He knew that face, he’d drawn it several times for the league files. It was missing the scar and golden eyes. But he knew that face.

He knew that face… Konstelacio ?

Ghost helpline part 16- Everyone goes home

Billy walked out of the, surprisingly opened at 3 am, art store with bags of painting supply. Ducking into an alley, he transformed. He felt a lot better.

Alright he was ready to head for Gotham, after all his family was waiting for him there.

Now how to get around the Bats, he could probably avoid them if he walked in Bludhaven right?

- “Ow! What the hell! Billy???” The kid had decided to detransform mid air and ended up on top of the small vampire.

“Jack?”

The two looked at each other, “Holly shit are you bleeding! Did I do that?”

“What no of course not! I just got caught up with some bigoted werewolf.” Reds blood was already dry, skin scared as if the encounter had taken place days ago. “Billy what are you even doing here?!”

“Finished that pie at the diner and took a walk around the place. Was just starting to head home”

Translation: I’m done with my mission and patrol of Fawcett and am trying to go home.

“And you didn’t take the short cut home because?”

Billy quizzically raised an eyebrow, seriously what does my sister see in this guy? “ Taking the long way seemed like a safer bet, especially in a town like this.”

Translation: Do you want me to get caught by the Batman ?? Huh? Do you?

“Right, we should get going there’s no telling if that wolf will come back. Need a lift?”

“Can’t we just call Dandy to pick us up?”

Red shook his head, “No can do, he left to go pick up Violet chances are he’s barely coming back into town.”

“What do you mean pick Violet up? Where is she?!?”

“It’s a whole thing, just look I am not comfortable being here right now. Don’t you know wolves travel in packs? Do you want a lift or not!?!?”

“Fine.” Jack hoisted Billy over his shoulder, “This is humiliating.”

“Hardy har har, I may be a weak vampire but even I can care you in this form. Now hold tight.”

They disappeared in a blur of pink.

And Nightwing set down the binoculars, this was going to be a long report.

—-

Dandy was ready to strangle them.

“Hold on hold on we can just check the mirror again!”

“Flipping flapjacks, where the heck is Small-ville?”

Klarion could feel Dandy’s eyes burning into him. Whoops, “Well I at least need to know what state we’re in for me to teleport more accurately… so.”

Danka smiled, “So we ask for directions! We are literally on top of a farm right now - someone has got to be here!”

“Well not like we got any other plans here.”

A short walk, a pie and a conversation later Klarion managed to teleport them to the mansion.

Dandy couldn’t enjoy it for a minute. He stopped dead in his tracks, “Klarion, we forgot the car.”

—- —- —-

Bruce’s neck hurt, did he sleep on the

bat-puter again? No it was too soft. He shifted and opened his eyes… he was on a couch? Oh, OH. That wasn’t suppose to happen, he couldn’t have been that tired. The tv was off, and there was a blanket on top of him.

Vlad was gone and the lights were dimmed.

Great he had made a fool out of himself.

Right, it was time to leave. Right now. He could apologize later but he had to leave.

CRASH!

Bruce jolted into action. The sound came from upstairs.

// He’s so going to get robbed.//

Dick was right, for god sakes the house didn’t even have cameras!

Bruce ran up the stairs.

CRash! ThUd! “Ow damn nmit”

Oh that didn’t sound like a criminal… that sounded like a kid.

Two doors opened, Vlad and a little boy came out of them.

The kid had black hair and blue eyes, “Who the fuck are you?”

“Billy!”

“Whatever old man, next time just let us know before you bring some side piece over.”

Oh good god he was another Jason.

——

Bruce got into his car and went home.

He left felling giddy and guilty, holding Vlad’s number.

Dick knew better to keep secrets from The Batman, so he wasn’t going to lie. He just also wasn’t going to tell him what happened to his face. If Bruce really needed to know what happened tonight he could read the report on it.

—- —- —-

Violet stares at the phone longer than necessary, she’s got one shot at this. Don’t fuck up.

She plucks a number out of her inventory and dials.

Violet has never been close to Bradley, he was quiet and reserved. He insisted that she couldn’t do anything without help, well on the upside if someone thinks you’re useless it’s not like you can disappoint them more than you already do.

“Hey Brad, can you come pick me up… I’m at a pub… yeah again…”

- Brad hung up the phone and abandoned his brothers at the movie theater. His sister had called him, him! Not Dandy or Danka or Klarion! She had called him! And now he he had a little sister to save!

He checked the time on his Lock Screen, a picture of Violet having a stuffed animal tea party, it was his prized possession. His little baby sister was just so adorable and kind. And if anyone in Gotham hurt her there was going to be hell to pay! - literally!

—- —- —-

Nioce

What me and my friend want to see in comics!!!

First pic is by Unpretty found it on Pinterest not here uhhh

Reacting to the DC- Verse

DC-Verse Theater

A Theater appeared in front of more than a dozen heroes. They were seemingly teleported in the middle of the day, none of their phones worked past the camera and the bats were slowly starting to tear the building apart. All of the doors were locked and none of them could open them, even with kryptonian strength.

The most concerning part was that they were all dressed as civilians.

Everyone in the room; Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, GL Hal, Green Arrow, Flash Barry, Aquaman, Dick, Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Cassandra, Damian, Duke, Barbra, Wally, Roy, Jon, Konner and Bart.

“Well we might as well raid the concession stand,” Wally could hear the other heroes eyes roll and can’t find it in him to care. Impulse beats him to the popcorn maker and screams as he opens the cabinet.

“Bart!” There on the floor hair tangled on the edge of door of the cabinet splayed out was a girl. She wasn’t breathing. “What the fuck what the absolute fuck.” Wally had seen plenty of horrible things in his job both of them but this entire situation unsettled him completely. “Barry I think you need to see this.”

The heroes knew better to crowed a body and allowed Barry and Batman to pass freely… they still stared tho. She looked short, half of her body still stuffed into the drawer making it hard to tell. Barry reached out and flipped her over. He need to check if maybe just maybe she was breathing. Flash stopped at his colleges intake of breath. Face up everyone could see a stained patch of her black hair was white.

Jason cussed up a storm.

Before Barry could begin touch her, the body arched up and gasped loudly.

“Holy shit back up man.”

Oh she was a live. That some how left the group with more questions.

She contorted, pulling her body out of the space. She looked …normal. Short, black hair, black eyes, tawny skin scarred. She stood up and stretched.

Clark blanched, “She’s breathing.” They got a few looks, “She definitely wasn’t breathing before.”

Jason couldn’t take it, “What are you?”

She stopped mid stretch, and shrugged, “I’m a chimera.” Her grin was all teeth.

“Well then let’s get this over with.”

“Get what over with, do you perhaps know why we are here miss -?” Journalist powers go!

“Well to watch the multiverse of course! Or at least that what I assume my boss wants me to do, can’t really think of another reason you lot would be here.”

“The multiverse? What’s that…” Clark asked.

The girl stopped and stared at him, “Tugh, you can all drop the act. I know who all of you are.”

“I don’t know-“

She pointed them out, “Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, yadda yadda yadda. Come on the faster we do this the faster you get sent home.”

The heroes started spewing outrage.

Diana spoke directly to her first tho, “Who are you? What is your bosses plan?”

The raven haired girl walked up to a seat and sat down, “Like I said I’m Chimera, and my boss probably wants me to show you guys the multiverse so you guys can I dunno learn a lesson or become stronger or some bull crap like that.”

Diana nodded, “And you have that ability? The ability to just see these things?”

“ I’d be a pretty bad Watcher if I didn’t!”

“Watcher?”

“Yup it’s like my title and rank, the infinite cosmos to watch and no one to share it with. “

Diana was growing concerned sure the girl knew things she shouldn’t but-

“So no worries about me spilling any secret identities, I’m entirely constrained to this dimension.” Her voice got softer annoyed, “Trust me I’ve tried.”

Diana really didn’t like the way that sounded.

“Oh and don’t worry about your world catching on fire without you it’s on pause till you get back.” The girl said flipping the screen on her phone, that presumably worked.

The heroes all looked around at each other, were they really doing this?

Roy was done, “As intriguing as this all is what if I don’t want to? Time being paused or not I have a baby at home to feed.”

She kept on scrolling, “Funny you say that as if we have a choice.”

“We?” Diana shared a look with Clark, she really wasn’t liking how this all sounded. Did they need to save this girl?

“Yup,” she made a popping sound on the ‘p’, “We, what part of this being my job do you not understand ?”

Diana didn’t have a response ready for that.

Jon floated over to the girl and sat down in the seat next to her, ignoring his dads whispers (and Damian’s yells) not to approach.

“What are you doing?”

“Looking at our options.”

-

Note: Feel free to send me anything you’d like them to react to!!!

Enter Dani stage left !

Corpse au my beloved

So Danny is currently living in Gotham because Clockwork said so. But since it’s Gotham he got shot should’ve died but instead just kept walking. The thing is a certain professional henchman who shot him also saw him just walk away. So the rumors are starting to spread about a child who cheated death but for a while it’s fine because no one believes it. But like a week later the same thing happened in front of a bunch henchmen, rogues, and bats. Now it’s a race to find Danny, some rogues just want see how Danny was doing it, others like joker just want to see if there was a way to kill him, while Batman just wants to find him to protect him, and Alfred is already preparing a room. No success until one night some cop discovers a pit filled dozens of same corpse. And that changes everything.

Okay okay okay

But just imagine himbo no brains Bruce Wayne being absolutely positively adorably and flirtatiously giddy at being invited!

Finally! A place he can be smart as Brucie, donate money and it’s a competitive game!!! Also also hi Alfred!!! Look look I’m on TV! And I’m not even Drunk!!!!

He gets one phone call and starts sweating bullets: I should call Tim but I don’t want the other kids to feel left out 🥺

Other guest: how could you possibly know that!?

Bruce, smiling wining and bouncing a little: ….

hyper-fixation….

Guest : on six different subjects!?!

Bruce: I have like…. six kids your point? Also dinasours are cool 😎 (cannon he like Dinos)

The internet/Gotham/high society thinking about how he runs out to hide every time something happens, flirts but doesn’t actually take anyone home (they noticed) and is constantly scanning the room:

ohhhhh he’s autistic

The kids: … your not wrong… but they way you got there is flawed

Ugh. Can you imagine how annoying it would be to watch Jeopardy/have a trivia night with Bruce know-it-all Wayne