Happy PRIDE Month Everyone!!!

Stop what you're doing, and take your goddamned medicine! I love you. Don't die. Be safe. Drink water. Eat good food. Do things for yourself, not for others. You deserve it.

It’s Monday did you take your medicine ?

I want the link

((Here you go my dude! https://iyashisource.com/iyashi-pendant/?referrer=CNWR_19831370317895&gclid=Cj0KCQjw6ar4BRDnARIsAITGzlDWuiYa7ST82FfNyDWtmVsGzkv4pFJAXq1lHmV_ND6SJLIRL42CEzUaAqQjEALw_wcB ))

"That's weird. Um, thanks for the cupcake though. I should probably report this to head management sometime soon however..."

*she turns to look at the humanoid, and smirks to herself at how ridiculous this outcome is, all because of a simple cupcake*

The TV headed humanoid walks over to you and hands you a cupcake before running in the opposite direction blasting ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’ by Rick Astley.

((I think this was from a long time ago, so I’m really sorry for the late answer))

“Huh. Wonder what flavor this is? Ah well. If this isnt the thing that’ll kill me, nothing will be.”

*she proceeds to eat the cupcake while observing said figure leave*

What I feel a lot of people learned this week:

Money is fake

The Economy is fake and we can manipulate it at will. Just for some reason we keep treating it like a natural phenomenon and not a man made thing. 

Time is arbitrary

‘I can’t have x after 10pm’ yes you can because who the fuck is stopping you?

Literally all barriers to helping people are fake 

i wear Sandals!!! i can Wear shoes just fine, Just do not like ones that squish me!!

Ah, I see! I must admit, if given the chance, I would like to walk barefoot through an empty distant field.

My Discovery.

Has anyone else really truly wondered who they actually are? I've always wondered if I was even human, since I was a child. I've known since i was a child that while my whole family was Christian, I was Pagan. Nothing has changed since then, not even after me uncovering the existence of SCP-343.

I am still a Pagan, however I now truly question my humanity. The other day, while I was setting up some protection wards, I was also thinking on a topic I had heard of: Blood Magic. I had heard that even some of the most powerful and experienced Pagans were hesitant towards it.

I wanted to try it, I wanted to prove that I too, was powerful. This was my biggest mistake, and yet my greatest discovery. Moments later, I had everything set up at my altar. I prayed to Hades, my patron God, to protect me, and to help me in this ritual. I did everything i was instructed to do. I created a small cut on my hand, and let the blood drip into the spiced and herbed water. I proceeded to drink said liquid, until there was no more liquid to drink.

I felt no different. The instructions had specifically quoted to call on a very powerful word the moment I was in any danger after the ritual was performed. I thought nothing of this.

The next day at work with the foundation, there was a breach. It was very minor, as a D-class had somehow escaped and was deemed unsafe due to acquiring a gun.

While I was finding a safe place to hide, I, of course, had the luck of running into said D-class. He was only a few feet away from me, when he held up the gun at me with a psychotic, shit eating grin. I outstretched my hands in a moment of panic, for any form of defense. I remembered my previous instructions, and called upon the ancient word.

My palms felt warm, and almost burning. A beam of light appeared from my hands, aimed directly at the D-class. Within seconds and a short ear piercing screech, the D-class was nothing more than a pile of ashes. After a few discussions with some higher ups, and some speculation, I was deemed a Type Blue.

My name is Dr. Thompson, I work for the SCP Foundation, and I still don't think I'm entirely human.

since Doctor Wondertainment is basically a parody of Willy Wonka, I hereby declare it’s canon that doctor Wondertainment’s father is a dentist who’s only anomalous ability consists of teleporting houses.

you punch nazis!

(requested by anonymous)