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Ftm trans - Blog Posts
“When we first met, I didn’t think about what you had going on ‘cause I was already going through a lot. That changed when we realized we needed to work together and I saw a different side to you and you saw a different side to me, I’ll be your anchor. I’ll do my best to help you, keep you alive and be stable for you. I hope you will do the same for me.” -Dante
Up close shots of the two, they have a enemies to friends relationship that does end up romantic but that’s later on in the future, like after what happens in the ROTTMNT movie.
So as of late, news in America has been devastating for many communities especially the LGBTQIA+ community and the POC community. As a trans man myself, I will not detransition (which for me has only been socially not physically sadly) or hide my shame, but, I am also unsure if I can risk seeking asylum elsewhere, as I do not have a valid passport and to get such a passport I would likely get all my documents confiscated due to my Drivers license having an X as my gender marker.
I know many who are afraid or nervous as well and I know my state is typically safe, but my family is not, my local community is not, and the risks and dangers will always be there for me. I remind my family I’m trans, I get screamed at and hit in the back of the head, I get told because I’m pregnant I’m not trans because trans people can’t have kids apparently. All I did was mention how I can’t leave the country anymore in a civil conversation.
Due to the state of everything I’m not very energetic or willing to post or message as much. I would love to post more and share more but it takes a lot of energy to get up anymore and even be around my own family, make my drs appointments, even go to work. I apologize for any radio silence, but living in a Nazi home is rather exhausting for me and my mental health may never recover from this first month of 4 long years.
I can not express how absolutely hilarious it is to have someone ask for titty pics when your wearing cargo shorts and a sweater.
I have observed 3 types if trans masc people
1.) Very aesthetic - they have a fashion sense. Often has dyed hair and possibly some elaborate jewelry on. Definitely has a pinterest and is usually an artist in one way or another. They also usually adopt different core styles like cottagecore etc.
2.) The average Joe - they tend to blend in quite well, and can be stealth or straight passing. More natural hair colors, and button up shirts.
3.) The rodent - Looks like they just climed out if the gutter. Caffeine is their life source. Most likely to see them in the late/early hours of night. Often wears the same clothes for multiple days and faintly smells of cheese.
Keep in mind there is overlap and any person can definitely embody all three. These are just some general observations I've made on the different types of trans masc people I have seen/met.
Life really does kick you when your down. I recovering from a week long flu and was finally feeling better then nature decides to peek it's head in and now I'm rolling around in my bed from the most ungodly cramps and no ibuprofen.
Its like I ate tocobell and really have to shit but I'm constipated at the same time and it's ripping the fabric of space and time inside me.
chat ima need yall to imagine somone
imagine a person, androgynous looking but if you had to choose, assuming youre thinking heteronormatively), see them as a guy and masculine
theyre black (very important when it comes to choosing my name tbh), nonbinary agender, usually has their afro (thats dyed blonde) out, will probably lock their hair soon
but they also love femininity, still dress feminine, and refers to themselves using the term “femboy”
whagt name do you vibe with for said person? thinking abt changing it bc my cousin makes fun of my current one a lot and my brother kinda makes fun of it
also, if you comment your own it needs to start with the letter s!! i dont want my initials to change lol
current preference is sage and soren tied for first and silas is in last place
somewhat nsft,
but YALL IM ALREADY HAVING BOTTOM GROWTH OMG
dude i cannot wait till i pass
i cannot wait till i look more masc and androgynous
i cannot wait till i look like how i want
i keep getting recommended posts by transfems and their journey and them passing im so jealous and happy for them theyre so happy they pass so well theyre so pretty i cant WAIT FOR THAT ERA OF MY TRANSITION WHERE I JUST AM SO PROUD AND OUT AND HAPPY AND POSTING ABOUT IT
my brothers response to me starting hrt a few weeks ago
yall i finally deleted twitter 🙏❤️
im healing
day i start hrt is the day i will hang up my trans flag yall, just need to buy it first :3 🙏
IWANNASTART HRT NOW PLEASEEE PLEASEHWBBA PLEASEEEE WHY IS THE APPT FOR 4/10 IMGOJNA CEY PLEWSE PELASW
dude i want to take out my hair and wear my fro i wanna look more masc 💔💔
I WANNA BE SOMEONES BOYFRIEND I WANT A BOYFRIEND I WANNA BE IN AN MLM RELATIONSHIP I WANNA BE GAY I WANT SOMEONE TO SAY IM THEIR BOYFRIEND I WANT TO SAY I HAVE A BOYFRIEND 💔💔💔
i get really upset whenever my “friend” (will get into that at a later date) or family who im out to whos aware that im trans uses the wrong pronouns for me
i used to think i wasnt upset by she/her pronouns, actively thought that i might be comfortable enough with them that i would use them but not identify as a woman but, im not.
im not comfortable with them being used on me
even some feminine terms im not comfortable being used on me
its more like im comfortable conforming for others, something i need to unlearn since its the reason why i detransitioned back in 2022. to make others comfortable.
im actively aware that it gets some getting used to so i dont complain about it at all, especially since my mom makes an active effort to correct herself
but i feel like the “friend” should especially be aware to at least try to use the correct pronouns for me especially since we spoke about my ex and the reason we broke up was due to my transition THEN spoke about the heinous thing he did to me after our breakup and she was so angry, literally saying that he doesnt see me as a man
my stereotypical trans name was elliot with the nickname as eli when i first came out back in 2020/2021
(i detransitioned due to transphobia but again, story for another day)
and it stuck with me
it isnt the name i use today but i use it in other ways
like the email i made when i came out includes it
i dont like it for me anymore but it was the name that helped me discover who i truly am
so
i dont mind the name elliot / eli
if i planned on changing my middle name,
id probably make it that
what i’ll probably do is tell people that my middle name is eli but not change it
my middle name means too much to my family, especially my mother that i cant imagine changing it
(but thats a story for another day)
IM SO JEALOUS OF GUYS ON HRT I WANNA BE ON HRT SO BAD FUCK WHY DID I HAVE TO PROMISE MY MOM I WOULDNT START UNTIL I STARTED THERAPY THERAPISTS ARE SO FUCKING EXPENSIVE IM HAVING SO MUCH GENDER ENVY GOD I WANNA LOOK MORE MASCULINE SO BADLY OH MY GOD
just got gender envy towards two youtuber and male singers :/
i GOTTA start hrt soon bruv 💔 i want my voice change badly 😭
yesterday, as i was going to my driving lesson, i realized that the random pair of sweats i picked up were the pair of that make my thighs very apparent (im curvy) and it almost made me break down crying 😭
like i love how curvy and fat my thighs are but hate anyone seeing them or any outfits that make it apparent because they cause me dysphoria/dysmorphia because people will see them and go “oh! woman.” since men typically dont got curves like this 😔
normalize big booty men 💔💔 normalize thick thighs men 💔💔💔
❝a vampire hidden underneath the oceans surface…❞
𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ 𓇼 ˙✧˖° 🫧 ⋆｡˚꩜🪼🦇⋆.ೃ࿔*:･𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝
welcome to my blog!!
⌗𝜗𝜚 Soren ! ☆ he/him/they/them ☆ 18!
>> vampire siren living in a hidden forest who comes out once in a while
my carrd!!! donate to help me get my top surgery!
>> black (🇯🇲🇺🇸) tboy !! genderfaun (agender+demiboy)
>> EST (nyc area)
>> infp/tp, 5w6, ☼ virgo ↑ libra ☾ gemini, 🥮🐕 (狗)
>> pansexual, acespec, demiromantic
>> anxiety riddled and possibly depressed
>> pre-t! hopefully starting late feb or early march!
>> pre-vet student ! (college freshman)
>> animal science, mycology, fungi, plant, bug, marine biology lover!!!
>> i have multiple aesthetics !! (mains are goth, vampire, cottagecore, fairycore)
>> i do art sometimes!! also play video games
>> i fb if i think youre cool…
>> DNI LIST: general DNI. zionist/pro israel (ew). maga / trump supporters. terfs+radfems (hating men isn’t feminism!! xx). misogynists. pedos (or “MAPs”). homophobes. transmeds. transphobes (babes youre on a transmans blog rn… leave). nazis (cannot believe i have to say this). if i think of more ill add more lol
>> my tags!!
> #🪼🦇 : all my posts! > #🪼🦇🐈 : my posts including my cat, Baby! > #🪼🦇vents : my vent posts > #🪼🦇 rants : my rant posts > #🪼🦇🏳️⚧️ : my experiences as a trans man! > #🪼🦇📔 : digital diary entries
ill add more as i think of more
˙✧˖° 🫧 ⋆｡˚꩜🪼🦇⋆.ೃ࿔*:･
the amount of hate i’ve experienced as a tman/tmasc is so shocking especially because a lot came from online queers and even other trans folk.
it disheartened me a lot seeing how trans men are treated online, ESPECIALLY by trans people and queers. we’re often forgotten, fetishized, have femininity forced on us, and are treated like villains for wanting to be / being men. even IN queer communities too!!
ive seen a post here on tumblr where someone was trying to vent in a trans discord server about how trans men are treated and usually ignored and erased and other trans people chimed in, telling him that its his fault because “of course he would be. no one wants to be around a masculine man”.
a trans woman (who used to act on the hate/undermined the hate and discrimination tmen/tmascs go through) once told me on reddit that it often comes from them being uncomfortable with masculinity as a whole so some of them would force it on us then blame us whenever we got upset over the way we’re treated.
i was once even told by a trans medicalist that i wasnt trans because i never experienced dysphoria before and i almost believed them since i didnt know much about trans stuff at the time!! if it werent for the people rightfully calling them out on it and telling me that i could instead have gender euphoria (which i do!!) and if it werent for them i wouldnt have realized that i was trans.
im lucky enough that i dont get much dysphoria or dysmorphia dressing fem still and actually love dressing that way! its just annoying how much its expected of us since we “were women at some point”. we’re fetishized in stereotypically feminine ways (ie: ftm porn often has us bottoming or doing more “fem” roles)
but then again, all this hate towards tmen/tmascs came from twitter and a subreddit thats well known for hating non binary tmen so LMAO dont know what i expected
Can we take a moment to think about the younger trans men and mascs on tumblr right now?
I was a teenager when ace and transmed discourses were at their peaks, and I can’t exaggerate how badly it affected me then.
Now trans men are the latest target, and I’m terrified for trans kids.
It’s easy to say “intracommunity discourse is an online problem! Go talk to queer people irl!”, but people forget that so many kids and teenagers do not have safe or reliable access to IRL LGBT+ communities and support groups. For many, online spaces are the only option.
We need to make sure the younger members of our community are being heard, and block out the hateful voices with messages of support and encouragement. Things are bad enough for trans people right now, and it's easy to forget that trans minors are often the ones suffering the most.
To any younger trans men or transmasculine people reading this:
The hate you are experiencing isn’t normal, it hasn’t always been like this, and it won’t always be this way. It is bleeding out from a small, miserable group of self-absorbed jerks.
Don’t feel obligated to call them out, don’t feel like you have to interact with these people. Please don’t doomscroll through discourse tags; it will make you feel like everyone is out to get you.
If you want to speak up for your community, that’s fine, but please take a break if you feel like your mental health is worsening. Block anybody who so much as breathes rudely in your direction.
You’re just as trans as the rest of us. You are welcome here.
Oh, and if you want to seek out external resources and groups, PFLAG helped me a lot when I was younger. It is an American-based organization, however, so if anyone has recommendations for those living outside of the US, please let me know in the reblogs!
the only good thing about being on it is that wearing a thick pad makes it look like i have a slight bulge
Tw for surgical scar
Dazai and his trans underlings
It's trans chuuya
all I want right now is to be handsome skinny boy. is that to much to ask?
Being transgender is just praying to the Steve Harrington poster on your wall to give you good hair.
natural voice change
Lower
Boom Your Voice
How to deepen your voice naturally
How to talk with a deeper voice
How to deepen your voice (pre-t) Voice masculinization
Vocal androgyny in speech and singing
This Phone App Helps Transgender Users Change The Pitch And Tone Of Their Voices (buzzfeed article)
Higher
Voice Feminization
Pitch, range, resonance, depth
How to develop a female voice
Feminine voice techniques
Love these quick sketches of simple designs
They all trans and gay
