Sirius: What Did I Ever Do To You?

plot: mother james is nagging sirius to get his transfiguration essay done.

james: it’s due TOMORROW MORNING, and it’s 9:15 pm, get a move on already!

sirius: well you said it yourself, it’s 9:15…which is basically 9:30 which means that it’s almost 10:00 and i really have to be in bed by 11:00. so…i haven’t the time to do anything, really.

he said we were endgame, turns out we were just infinity war.

-1975-

james: snape will never have a love life.

remus: someone’s bound to find him…tolerable.

james: how about we place a bet?

remus: 5 galleons.

-1993-

remus: *takes one look at snape, and immediately runs out, looking up at the sky*

remus: COME BACK YOU ARSE, I OWE YOU 5 GALLEONS!

plot: the slytherins are failing to get into the gryffindor common room to get sirius and james who just pulled another prank on them, while the two potter boys blast “insane in the brain” by cypress hill.

james: *dancing on a table* cops, come and try to snatch my crops.

sirius: *twerking by the portrait hole* these pigs wanna blow my house down.

sirius, singing his little heart out with james’ hair brush: got a long list of ex-lovers, they’ll tell you i’m insane.

remus: they don’t have to tell me, i can see it from a mile away.

hi my lovelies!!

i hope you’re enjoying the account as much i enjoy posting on it.

happy new year, and thank you all so so much for your support, it really means the world to me 🤍🤍

i just wanted to clarify that this is an anti-JKR, anti-dumbledore, and anti-snape account.

and that’s all! have a great day my lovelies <33

head canon:

george and fred stole the marauders map on a rainy day, when they finally figured out how to open and use it, a loud rumble of thunder broke out through the soft pitter patters of the raindrops hitting the window, it was as if the sky was congratulating them for it.

but the sky wasn’t, it was actually james potter, watching them from above and cheering them on with all the power he had.

Reblog if you support asexuals and aren’t a COWARD

RB if your blog is a safe, accepting space for asexuals!

plot: regulus and sirius are secretly on the facetime with each other.

regulus: mother says that my “night time calls have to stop” she thinks i’m being too disruptive while she and father are trying to sleep.

sirius: aren’t old people supposed to be, i don’t know…hard of hearing? like, what’s up with the spidey sense luv? you tryna sleep or eavesdrop?

regulus: *bursts out laughing, eventually losing balance and falling off his chair*

sirius: *bursts out laughing at regulus, and ends up falling off his bed*

both of them stayed on their floors, staring at each others’ foreheads in the camera frame, wheezing with laughter for about 10 minutes.

people who were killed after dying:

1- dumblewhore: by all the marauders collectively, but lead by james.

2- peter pettigrowsomeballsplease: by sirius black and strangely regulus black too.

3- snivellus snape: by lily evans because “how dare you sacrifice my husband and son but ask for me to be spared?”

4- remus lupin and mary macdonald: they were suffocated by a hug from all the marauders.