Reblog If You Support Asexuals And Aren’t A COWARD

me: i don’t chase, i attract.

the guy i like: *exists*

me:

sirius: *places a newly rolled blunt on the street*

sirius: it’s a highway…get it? highway? cause blunt and road…y’know?

james: *throws his shoe at sirius*

lily: *hexes him bald*

remus: *takes off his wedding ring and places it in sirius’ hand*

regulus: *updates his insta bio to ‘only child’*

plot: regulus and sirius are secretly on the facetime with each other.

regulus: mother says that my “night time calls have to stop” she thinks i’m being too disruptive while she and father are trying to sleep.

sirius: aren’t old people supposed to be, i don’t know…hard of hearing? like, what’s up with the spidey sense luv? you tryna sleep or eavesdrop?

regulus: *bursts out laughing, eventually losing balance and falling off his chair*

sirius: *bursts out laughing at regulus, and ends up falling off his bed*

both of them stayed on their floors, staring at each others’ foreheads in the camera frame, wheezing with laughter for about 10 minutes.

sirius and remus texting:

sirius: i love you, stay safe! <33

remus: will do, i love you too abby. <3

remus: baby*

*sirius black is typing…*

remus: oh god, here we go again…

HC:

all the marauders got matching “the marauders are here” tattoos over their hearts.

but before betraying the potters, peter had the “are” on his chest crossed out and replaced with “were”.

*sirius struggling in the kitchen at 3 am.*

remus: what’s going on, love?

sirius: trying to rip the slutty little fishnets off my damn oranges.

james: *is laying on the floor with a clear quartz stone on his head*

james: i do not chase, i attract, what belongs to me will simply find me.

sirius: *peeks his head into the dorm room*

sirius: james, come say hi to regulus in the common room.

james: HI — IM JAMES BUT YOU PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW THAT — IM THE BEST CHASER HOGWARTS HAD EVER SEEN — I LIVE TO CHASE.

sirius black had a fear of needles (but not when it came to piercings and tattoos). so naturally, he always refused to take blood tests.

remus: blood tests are very important sirius, we need to know which vitamins you lack and what’s going on in the junk food dumpster you call a body.

sirius: here for a good time, not for a long time.😗✌️

james is texting a sleepy regulus at 3am.

james: reg, would you still love me if i had no ears?

regulus: no, goodnight.

hi my lovelies!!

i hope you’re enjoying the account as much i enjoy posting on it.

happy new year, and thank you all so so much for your support, it really means the world to me 🤍🤍

i just wanted to clarify that this is an anti-JKR, anti-dumbledore, and anti-snape account.

and that’s all! have a great day my lovelies <33