But Every Cliche Hits Harder When It's Enemies To Lovers Tho.

This dynamic has me on a chokehold and I don't want it to stop!

The villain-: *tries to bring eternal pain and suffering on the hero on a bi-weekly basis*

Someone else-: *gets a tiny scratch on hero*

Villain-: *absolutely feral* *ready to smite them* "Only I get to hurt my hero!! How dare you."

aNd, Listen to me. "When I say no one but me gets to hurt you, that includes you. Take care of yourself."

And somehow they still manage to stay oblivious to their own feelings because of dumb bitch reasons, but when the hero is seriously hurt and they feel so intensely protective and do everything to save them before finally being hit with the 'oh shit' moment (after the hero is already dead if the writer is satan's dad)

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I NEED more Hero x villain ships where the dynamic just straight up flips midway through.

The villain being all flirty and teasing at the start, but then they start caring bout the hero and everything they say affects them and so they try to withdraw. But, but. The hero also got comfortable with and let loose, joke , flirt, everything. And the villain doesn't know how to deal and so get fumbley and angry trying to shut it down.

"Ooo, scary. What if I don't, huh?" The hero pouted, " You're to gonna make me?"

"Shut up." The villain growled.

Hero hit their shoulder. "Come on. You used to be fun."

The villain bit their lip and turned to them, "I said. Shut. Up."

Maybe we're all tragedies,

Covered in skins

too stubborn to be tragic.

Obsessed with the new dynamic that I'll call 'youre fired if you die'

A is boss/king of b. A is gruff and mean and socially awkward. B is sassy and sunshine and also mean. They do NOT like each other.

What follows is an idiots to lovers office romance filled with lots of bickering, ordering around (by grumpy) and mediaeval fantasy equivalent of unionization attempts ( by sunshine)

Highlights include-

"You're late." "It's literally just half a minute." "It'll be cut from your pay."

*sneezes in front of expensive object* *from the other room* "That'll be cut from you're pay"

*working slowly cause they cut they're hand or something* "Work faster." "I'm literally bleeding, can't you ask how I'm doing like a normal human." *Unable to in fact express concern like a normal human* "Well, stop bleeding."

And off course, *Actually dying* *in tears* "I'll fire you if you die"

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*in a single breath* That awkward moment when the villain who's been groomed their whole life by their parental figure/ class to have an inflated self worth and skewed view of their world's systems and general morality is forced to face the reality and everything they've believed their entire life crumbles around them rendering them almost incapable of functioning from the emotional stress and aslo maybe leaving them physically injured or wanted and so the hero is forced to or takes pity on them and has to take care of them and watch them go through the confusion and trauma of literally revising everything they ever knew and starts to see what they are beneath all their indoctrine for the first time and connect with them on their similarities—ahHh. So good

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You know that trope of they were childhood sweethearts/ crushes and gifted some personalized gift or even some random offhand token like a handkerchief or hoodie? Yeah but were separated for a long time but then are brought back together in wildly different circumstances and they're at their place and they see it, clearly preserved with care?!;!!

Yeah I'll take 79326038+ of that exact same trope.

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I will absolutely inhale any piece of media containing, my beloved, 'Two same-gender people, likely a mean girl and good girl are initially presented as romantic rivals for the most average boy you'll ever meet, but turns out they were just really gay aNd dumb all along.' it just has so hard 'fuck men, who even needs em anyway' it gives me life.

aNd And, when the mean girl (or boy) AGGRESSIVELY tries to deny her own gayness by trying to convince herself she just has feelings for the boy, and just fails so so bad. Like her internel monologue is just 264996 things I hate about you and then proceeding to simp plus extra for the girl and then telling herself she's into the boy. It's a high and I'll chase it all my life

+ if the boy's and adorable himbo jock and thinks they're into him. The second hand embarassment!! 😂. Tbh works if he's an ass too but flipped on its heed, the absolute joy of watching him embarrass him.

I can read 37926 books with the exact same plot.

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I'm came for the couple in crisis but I stay for the couple who've already solved their crisis and are now sharing a chair and judging everyone. Plain old a couple who hates the same people stay together.

"Remember when we were stupid as them, babe."

"Babe, can we beat them up?"

"Babe, let's intervene in those dumbass' love life. They can't be trusted with it."

If your book doesn't have them. I'm still prolly gonna read it, but like... I'd prefer it if it did cause they're amazing.

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The "Hero finds out they are working for the currupt/evil side and the villian is actually the good guy" literally never had a bad track.

Angsty "And who decided I'm the bad guy? My enemies." SLAPS, extended " I'm no expert but that might be a bit biased." ROCKS

The hero now having to work with the villian. YES. Getting a bastard-isation arc cause "they are my family." It got better. Long drawn story filled with side switching and double-crossing, TEN season/book material right there m'lord.

The AGGRESSIVELY UNDERLYING message of, overthrow your local currupt government today. Gets me every time!!!

My basic bitch trait is I'll always flip a table for the painfully cliche enemies to lovers trope of calling the other sweetheart or love or darling or shit derogatory at the start and both getting used to it and it slowly becoming affectionate.

AND, when they fight when they fight they don't call them that at all instead of it being condescending again because their relationship has fundamentally changed to the point of no return. AND and if their partner feels the absence and misses it so deeply realising the effed up. I will ascend to a higher plane bitch

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