Good Job Huckleberry

#Fangs of Fortune #Amazing!

ZYZ + ZYC = 20. Kiss on a scar ♥️

Amazing choice, thank you! This one went a little maudling...

I'm still taking prompts! You can find the full list here, or feel free to make up a fun addition to the list~

Zhao Yuanzhou forgets at times how easily humans scar. How they carry the visual, visceral evidence of their defeats or their victories on their bodies for the entirety of their short lifespans. He shudders at the thought: if one had to wear one's scars for life, at his age he might be covered in scars. It's probably for the best he can heal himself as well as he can.

Next to him on the bed Zhou Yichen sleeps on, unaware he is being watched so carefully. He claims he sleeps better when someone is with him, and to his credit Zhao Yuanzhou hasn't seen him have any nightmares on any of the nights they spent together. If he makes sure to thoroughly exhaust Zhou Yichen before he falls asleep, well, one does what one must to help a friend avoid nightmares.

The sweat they worked up together has since dried on Yichen's skin, but the smell of them still lingers in the room. These quiet moments feel like a luxury, and he would wake Yichen to share the moment, but waking him would break the moment too, and Yichen would not appreciate being woken for anything other than an emergency.

So Zhao Yuanzhou luxuriates in the peace alone, remembering the scars that cross Yichen's shoulders, the one round arrow scar next to his navel, the barely-visible scars on his hands. To say Zhou Yichen isn't self conscious about them would be a lie, but he forgets to hide himself between moans and sighs as they spend an evening in each other's company. It is only afterwards that he remembers, and they both pretend Zhao Yuanzhou hasn't long seen the past Yichen carries with him on his skin, like he didn't kiss the same expanse of flesh moments or hours ago.

Zhou Yichen rolls onto his side, his back now to Zhao Yuanzhou. Normally Zhao Yuanzhou would take this opportunity to lie down beside him, to pull him close, and fit them together in a way that will help him trap Yichen in bed come morning. Tonight, instead, he sits up, leaning on one hand as he reaches out and slides Yichen's shirt off his shoulder.

Lean muscles shrug in response to the cold, but Zhou Yichen doesn't wake. Instead he curls in on himself, pushing his back closer to Zhao Yuanzhou's warmth. In the moonlight the visible scars gleam like pearls, like treasures instead of imperfections.

Zhao Yuanzhou can't help himself– and why should he? He is a demon, after all. He leans in close, running a hand under Yichen's arm and to his chest to hold him in place (to hold him close), and presses a soft trail of kisses along one ridged scar, and down another. Zhou Yichen stirs, but wakes only slowly. Still languid from their earlier efforts, he only moves far enough to open one eye and stare balefully but sleepily and Zhao Yuanzhou.

"What are you doing, you ridiculous demon?"

"Hmm, I'm having my wicked way with you, can't you tell, Xiao Zhuo-daren?" Zhao Yuanzhou teases, lips barely releasing the marked skin under them to form the words.

"Why do you like them so much?" Yichen doesn't even respond to the teasing. It's no fun, except for the fact that Zhao Yuanzhou vividly remembers how he caused his current exhaustion. He finally relents his kisses, and settles down with his chest to Yichen's back, head propped up on one arm to lean over him- to be able to kiss him properly.

"I find it fascinating, the way you humans carry your past with you." 

Judging by his frown, Yichen is not moved by his kiss. "And must you enact this fascination in the middle of the night?"

"Would you prefer I do it during the day instead?" He replies in mock-surprise. They both know the answer to that, and Yichen pulls him into a rough kiss just to shut him up.

"No. Now sleep, you great ape."

I don’t know if I can contain my “The Muppet Christmas Carol has better costume design than most Oscar-nominated period dramas” rant until after Thanksgiving you guys, I have…so many Thoughts

So. If I try to talk abt everything this show made me feel at once it would be a whole book. Hence: we’re breaking it down. First stop: Hu-min and Hyeontak.

I’m a big fan of the webtoon and I’m gonna do a little compare/contrast at the end but first I wanna focus on solely material from the show. Slight background for those who don’t know though, Go Hyeontak (Alex/GoGo) and Park Humin (Ben/Big Ben) are THE ultimate BROTP in the webtoon so I did come into this rly pulling for the show to keep that element of their relationship, and I think for the most pert they delivered.

The scene that sets the tone: Their mutual trust.

First instance that made me go “hell yes this is gonna be good” is during Ep. 2 (32:12 ish) where Gotak and Juntae have been fighting and Baku enters. Gotak is curled up in a defensive fetal position on the ground but the *second* he hears Baku’s voice echo through the tunnel he relaxes. Full on slumps down, drops his arms, and just lays there, it almost looks instinctive. He knows as long as Humin is around he’s safe. It’s such a small thing and so far I haven’t seen any reactors point it out which is understandable. But the fact that this is the first scene that they’re in together, essentially their first interaction, albeit slightly indirect, and the camera is purposefully not on the faces of the thugs surrounding Gotak (although we do hear them voice their fear) but on Hyeontak’s absolute relief in Baku’s presence I think not only sets the tone for their relationship (in fact I believe this is arguably the most important scene btw them) but also very demonstrative of how they want us to view Humin’s character. [I have to clue how to do GIFs but I need someone to do this scene PLS TT]

Yes he’s coming in guns blazing, but our immediate focus isn’t supposed to be the terror of his adversaries, but instead the release from his friend. It immediately sets him up as someone who protects those close to him. He isn’t violent for the sake of violence, he has a purpose, and that is preserving the things precious to him. In this case, his platonic male-wife Gotak. This is making me realize I’m gonna do individual character analysis for everybody lol.

But while Baku is concerned for Gotak, he obviously trusts him enough to have handled himself, even though he’s “weaker” than Humin which I really appreciate.

So the second tenant in their relationship: They way they keep each other in check.

At the beginning of ep. 3 we see Hyeontak begin to apologize to Sieun without any prompting, but it’s clearly a bit hesitant and he seems unwilling to fully admit he was in the wrong/crossed the line (haha I’m so funny). Which is when Baku steps in and “forces” him into a bow and begins to “help” Gotak apologize to Sieun while also essentially trying to pull Gotak out of potential hot water by saying ‘ah yk he’s a bit dumb so pls forgive him’. Later after they’re called into the office together we see Baku again prompting an awkward Gotak to give a much more genuine apology to Sieun. The whole interaction very much implied to me that Baku and Gotak had a whole convo abt how he was going to apologize and what he would say which I love. Mom friend Baku said ‘apologize to this nice young man’. They even simultaneously provoke but also regulate one another in the principles office.

While Baku seems to help Hyeontak with his quick temper, Gotak seems to help him reign in his….exuberant social skills. We see this several times: most notably with Sieun. first when Gotak interrupts Baku messing w/ Sieun’s hair, pulling him away and saying “know when to stop” (ep. 3 10:34), and the second in ep. 5 @ 13:40 when Baku slides into Sieun while he’s studying. Gotak comes in behind and actually kicks Baku (who retaliates ofc) to get him off Sieun a bit and then says “You’re bothering Sieun again, you punk”. The fact that it’s clearly a consistent pattern for Gotak to help regulate Baku (someone who clearly gets excited and while being emotionally intelligent, either willfully ignores or misses some social cues) is extremely endearing to me.

In a slightly more serious tone, later in ep. 5 (31:56) during a conversation with Sieun, Hyeontak says that this isn’t the first time Humin has gotten into a fight and “when he gets back, I’ll knock some sense into him”. Of course it’s obvious Gotak could never beat Humin in a true fight yet Gotak is absolutely assured that he’ll be able to get Baku to listen, implying to me that they’ve done this dance before, and Baku truly does hear what Gotak has to say.Hence even small phrases like this really emphasize how much Baku respects and appreciates Gotak. The king of Eunjang High, this incredibly powerful kid, truly listens to his friend.

The most powerful example of this is probably ep 7 starting abt 4 min in, where Baku is choking a Union member who was involved in severely beating Gotak and Juntae. Gotak immediately rushes over and begins pulling on Humin’s arm, yelling at him to stop and that he’s done enough. Unfortunately, Baku is clearly out of it and barely even seems to register Gotak’s presence. This scene may also be the first time we see Hyeontak refer to him as “Humin” rather than Baku. Eventually Baku is snapped out of it by Juntae coming over with news about Sieun, so while Gotak isn’t the one to ultimately get through to Baku, I think the scene is another important sign of their devotion to one another. Baku, when he does notice Hyeontak is clearly angry that he’s trying to stop him, even yelling “let go of me asshole”.

In many shows the characters next move would be to bodily throw their friend away. Yet even in the midst of this rage/disassociation, Baku doesn’t lay a hand on Gotak, proving that Gotak’s blind trust in getting all up in the business of his raging friend was warranted. There is no universe where Baku forgets himself and lays a serious hand on Hyeontak.

The idea of Baku’s hands on Hyeontak brings me to point three: The clinginess

There are way too many example scenes for me to go through and time-stamp all of them, ya’ll will have to look yourselves. But in 9/10 scenes that these two are together, Baku is touching Gotak in some way. Most commonly it’s an arm around the shoulder (see gif above lol). But they’re also shown to be constantly roughhousing, and at one point (ok I am time-stamping this bc it’s so specific: ep. 5 12:50 ish) Gotak almost seems to be playing with Baku’s hand that’s hanging over his shoulder. Now Baku is clearly an affectionate person, he spends a significant amount of time hanging off of Juntae and Sieun as well (don’t even get me started on him gently caressing Juntae’s face during ep 7) it does seem particularly pronounced with Gotak.

In fact, during my watch through notes (it was serious for me y’all) I legit wrote: “The way Humin has an arm around Hyeontak at all times, its rly serious for this man. Must tough beside or die”. And that was only by ep. 3 lol. IDK as someone who is also a very touchy person, specifically w/ my bff, this rly resonated with me. The actors just did such a great job making it feel so natural. Ofc Baku has his arm around Gotak, this is how they always are. Gotak never even stumbles or resists when Baku reaches out for him, he just molds right into him and I love it sm

*Clicks to Powerpoint slide number four*: The way they know everything abt e/o

Alright I admit, this one is a bit of a filler section, but tbh I just rly wanted to talk abt the scene where Gotak recognizes Baku’s underwear (ep 6 23:55) bc what-

Like I ADORE my bestie. We’re essentially married. We have a tally going of people who’ve asked it we’re gay for e/o. And yet. AND YET! I would not recognize her underwear?

Which leaves us with two options: either Gotak is just routinely seeing his bros underwear (and this also means Baku is unironically wearing tiger briefs)? I mean tbf idk how guys do friendship this could be par for the course.

or he bought Humin the underwear as a gag gift, and then Baku proceeds to legit wear them. Both options are absolutely hilarious and I love any and all implications of this scene.

I don’t even wanna know why the hell Baku has his underwear just hanging on the wall

But on a slightly more serious note, earlier in the same episode at around 8:52, Gotak tells the other two boys that Baku used to stay at his house whenever his dad got drunk. Couple that with how completely unsurprised Hyeontak is with his father’s behavior the entire scene, and it becomes obvious that Gotak knows all about Humin’s struggles with his dad. In fact, at another point (I’m not looking for this time-stamp sry) Gotak reveals that he knows Humin and Baekjin were childhood friends, so Baku clearly has no reservations telling Gotak about all the painful parts of his past.

Of course, throughout the plot of the show Baku does hide things from Gotak and even outright lies about where he’s going on a few occasions, but the fact that Hyeontak seems only slightly suspicious and then accepts his answers really seems to affirm the idea that they’re generally completely transparent with one another or maybe im reading too much into this

Yeah no I just love that they seem to know everything about each other, and that their trust goes beyond physical protection, but extends to faith that the other will protect their emotional wounds as well.

Speaking of protectiveness, our fifth discussion point: The way they’d kill for one another

Like they are INSANE about each other. Gotak consistently gets pissed when people imply that he’s Humin’s lackey. In the first confrontation we see Gotak have with Choi Hyoman, it can be easily interpreted as a hot headed kid pissed he’s getting called someone else’s henchman. But as we watch the show and get more and more context about them, I really don’t think that’s the reason he’s so upset. If Gotak is Baku’s lackey, than that means that Baku’s is the same as the Union people he’s fighting so hard against. I truly think that Gotak isn’t offended for himself (or at least not solely, Im sure that does sting the pride a bit), but more so upset about the implications for Baku’s honor. The idea that he would have or even need lackeys is unacceptable to Hyeontak, and he makes sure to set everyone straight.

While of course Hyeontak is protective of Humin and routinely gets into fights on his behalf, the real guard dog in this relationship is clearly Baku. That man does not mess around when it comes to Gotak, and everyone knows it. In fact, Baku’s absolute devotion to Gotak makes him a target for people trying to get at Baku. Unfortunately many of them fail to realize they’ve essentially signed their own death certificate.

In ep 4 during the confrontation btw Seongjae (?) and Gotak we learn (and see briefly in flashback 14:30) that Hyeontak has been greviously injured by him before, more on my opinion of this plot point in a Gotak centric post and at the beginning of ep 5, Baku elaborates on this in conversation with Sieun, explaining that Gotak used to be a taekwondo athlete, but had to quit after his knee was seriously injured “Because of hanging out with me” Baku says, which could mean it was either a targeted attack on Gotak to upset Humin, or simply a casualty of getting in a fight to help his bestie out. Either way, it’s clear that Baku felt, and still feels (by looked like he was abt to cry thinking abt it), responsible for Hyeontak’s injury.

I like to think the reason he showed up with such perfect timing in the underpass during ep. 2 is because he made Gotak download Life360 or some equivalent tracker

The most obvious instance of Baku’s mile wide protective streak for Hyeontak is when Baekjin sends guys to beat him up explicitly to get a reaction out of Humin. And what a reaction it was. I mean look at this:

That is the face of a man who is not messing around with the implication that u hurt his bestie/husband/soulmate etc. Baekjin was abt to become one with the lamp. He doesn’t even have confirmation that anything is wrong atp. All it took was a mere SUGGESTION that someone might have gone after Gotak and *boom*. True cinema right there.

I mean the look on his face in ep. 7 @ 3:50 when he sees Hyeontak (and Juntae) horribly beaten on the ground? A delicious mix of horror, disbelief, and absolute rage. Seriously, big props to the actor for his nuanced facial expressions the whole show. His frustration with the union and Baekjin finally exploding when he learns Hyeontak and Juntae are in danger (ep. 6 28:48 ish)? Like the fact that Hyeontak getting hurt is essentially he proverbial straw that broke his back? Scrumptious. And then ofc I’ve already mentioned how he goes absolutely apeshit on the guys who beat up his babies. I mean he literally takes a crowbar to the back of the head (at speed?!) and then immediately proceeds to punch through a motorcycle helmet. Hulk who? Baku doesn’t play when it comes to avenging his people (and ofc specifically Gotak).

Ofc I have to mention ep. 8 at minute 4:28 when Baku scolds Gotak for jumping rope bc “You’ve got bad knees already man” and then looks away with a face full of resigned guilt and regret. And Hyeontak just glances at him and sighs, with an expression that just so clearly says ‘I’ve told you before it wasn’t your fault, how long till you believe me idiot, I could never blame you for anything, you sweet stupid man stop worrying about me’. maybe that’s a bit much to interpret from his face but I believe in my powers of perception ok

Then we have later on in ep 8 during the big fight at 29:19, where Hyeontak can barely walk, and yet he’s going to challenge Baekjin, because Baku is still vulnerable on the ground, and like hell is he going to let the guy who’s been tormenting *his* Baku win.

Like this devotion just- I can’t handle it they make me wanna scream

We’ll finish of with a lighter idea for our final section: The fact that they fight like an old married couple

I mean seriously. In their first on screen exchange, Gotak asks Baku if he has hot sauce in his hair (ngl I though he pulled the red of nicely TT) and proceeds to crack himself up although that may have been the concussion

If they’re not calling each other names, you know something is wrong. The absolute epitome of “Bastard (affectionate)”. It’s even funnier because while they do occasionally use a playful insult with Juntae or Sieun, it’s much rarer. Like it really is just their version of pet names and I love that for them. I particularly love the scenes at ep 3 starting at minute 7 with the slap fight, the “all grown up? I’ve always been taller” from Gotak (which I find especially funny bc its not like he towers over Baku or anything) the unrelenting headlock from Baku that turns into what’s almost a protective hold when he spots Sieun and Juntae. Now ofc he’s exaggerating and acting over the top as he does, but at this point all he knows about them is the rumors about Sieun, and the fact that he was in a fight with Hyeontak and didn’t seem particularly receptive to the attempted apology. So I’m sure there was just a slight bit of apprehension, and although “are we under attack” sounds like a joke, he was most likely serious in the intention behind it. Idk I just find it sweet that the minute it stopped being a safe little bubble of ‘Baku and Gotak’ and there was a potential outside threat, he gets in this (overdramatic) defensive position *around* Gotak.

The constant jabs at e/o’s intelligence are perfection, and I, like everyone else (including Sieun! the baby smile hdjskfdhg) adore the scene in ep 3 around 16:20 when they’re just getting into it over Baku’s attempt to pick up girls lol

—————————————————————————————————

That’s all I have for an analysis solely using the show, now I’m gonna do a brief compare/contrast with the webtoon bc I’m a huge fan of it. I 100% recommend it to everyone who enjoyed the show. There are some big differences, so it’s not at all like you’re going through the same plot twice, and the friendships are genuinely some of my favorite in all media. And I mean books, movies, tv shows etc. This webtoon manages to do relationships so so well.

Since I’m recommending it and ik a lot of ppl who watched the show haven’t read it yet, I’m not going to be too in depth or spoilery here, just covering things you would already expect to happen after having watched the show, and some panels to emphasize my points.

[reminder that the Eng. translation changed some names, so Baku = Ben and Gotak = Alex]

WEBTOON Analysis:

So in the webtoon Gotak (who gets called GoGo by Baku and the others, one thing I truly mourn lol) and Baku are the ULTIMATE duo. There a a million fantastic friendships in the comic, but they consistently stand out. The show did keep a lot of that feeling, but if you go read the webtoon, expect it to be dialed up to 11. True husbands honestly

They’re also childhood friends, a plot point given to Baekjin and Baku in the show still don’t know how I feel abt that, and are essentially inseparable. The whole “teacher asks one where the other is” gig, except it even extends to their friends lol. One simply does not appear without the other

I mentioned earlier when talking abt the show that these two tend to keep each other in check, both physically and in terms of social blunders. This is also a trait present in the webtoon, with Gotak often apologizing for or managing Baku’s extreme dumbass energy, and Baku in turn curbs Gotak’s intense “fight first ask questions never” tendencies.

Several times while watching the show I thought to myself, “Biblically accurate Baku and GoGo”, specifically in relation to the entire premise of Gotak being Baku’s trigger. In the webtoon, “use Hyeontak to get to Baku” is a strategy employed by the Union several times, and Baku’s reaction is just as good as in the show. In fact I even have it written down in my watch notes: “Biblically accurate Gotak getting beat into a pulp”. Like the poor guy has a giant red target hanging over his head. Just like in the show however, he doesn’t care as long as he gets to stay by Baku and support him.

Baku’s reaction to seeing Gotak injured:

In more serious situations Gotak is Baku’s anchor in a similar way to what’s shown in ep. 7, albeit a bit more successfully lol. In fact, at one point another character narrating literally calls Gotak “Baku’s brakes”. He truly is the only one that can get through to Baku when the rage consumes him, especially if the reason Baku is turning someone into dust is because they went after Gotak.

Gotak is also shown to be a bit more actively supportive in the webtoon. In the show it’s Sieun that really leads the charge to bring Baku back, which I don’t mind in the context of the show, but webtoon!Gotak would never have let him walk away in the first place. The stress and pressure put upon Baku as a result of being the only one standing between the Union and Eunjang is a big focus in the webtoon, and smth Gotak takes seriously.

like in the show, GoGo goes after anyone talking about Baku behind his back, whether that be insults, skepticism about his fighting prowess, or insinuations that Gotak is his “minion”. He’s so serious about being the best possible support for Baku that he takes up boxing in an attempt to get stronger (which is where I assume they pulled the taekwondo background from for the show. I don’t mind at all that they did that, there wasn’t enough time for him to have a training arc in the middle lol).

The best part about them though is that they’re still the same old goofy, antagonistic besties/married couple they are in the show. The writers really did a great job keeping that levity and hope that characterizes the webtoon

There is one aspect of their relationship: Gotak’s knee injury, that is VASTLY different from the webtoon, but I want to keep this post relatively webtoon spoiler free, and also I’ve been working on this for abt 3 and 1/2 hours now….so that’ll be another post

✨ I see the vision ✨

I have excellent news for all of you.

→ THE WEST WING (1999-2006) 2.10 'Noël' (insp)

What is it you are hiding underneath that red cloth?

everyone: the pitt is great! so nice to have a medical show that’s not all about who’s sleeping together!

me: it’s all very simple collins and robby are in love with each other but collins and dana are platonic girlfriends who kiss and have sex but are straight which is different to perlah and princess who also do this but are bi and robby has a thing for that dunkin donuts doctor that’s purely sexual and a thing for abbot that at its core is a deep desire for a strong firm father figure to treat him like a babygirl to offset his anxiety about having to be everyone else’s big strong father figure and it’s deeply sexual but abbot is playing 4d chess trying to get mohan to tie him up in a basement meanwhile langdon is beaming his own deeply sexual father figure crush on robby completely one-sided but also langdon and mel are having a dark fantasy romance smut novel 2007 she’s all that romcom wattpad nerd x jock adultery lost focus and had a consensual workplace relationship except mel might just forgo all of that for a class president x troublemaker exploratory sex with girlbestfriend trinity meanwhile trinity is one ‘can i do the intubation?’ away from being eiffel-towered by two of the hottest older lesbians at the hospital meanwhile whittaker is gonna have a farm wedding with that hot nurse in the next 2 to 3 business years where she’ll peg him on the wedding night and mateo is going to give my girl javadi head so good that it’s gonna solve her mommy issues

a Kat 🐈 rambles post

I apparently have a lot to say about Top Form, but in respect for the limited time I have, I'm here to say:

Jin's redemption is in giving Akin what he needed - even if it wasn't what I, as the audience, wanted.

Discussion of Top Form episode 6 and 7 under the cut. TW for discussion of SA.

I have a whole unwritten post in my head about The Nightmare Jin / Akin Heart Rending Fest at the end of episode 6, and how Jin, who has been a magical unicorn of giving Akin what he needs all along, failed Akin.

I have A LOT of feelings. I wanted groveling. I wanted to see Jin feeling all the shock and horror of understanding what he did. Of how he stomped on Akin in his moment of greatest vulnerability, of how broken and wounded Akin was in the garage, and how Jin - the one person Akin NEEDED to love him and hold him and comfort him - shattered what was left of Akin. I wanted epic level groveling and amends making. I wanted Jin to metaphorically rip his own heart out of his chest and lay it at Akin's feet. After the opening of episode 7 I wanted blood to run in the streets for that man. I was ready to go vengeance demon for Akin.

But what I wanted, is the exact opposite of what Akin needed.

Jin's biggest failure in the series was how he got so caught up in his own feelings in episode 6, that he couldn't SEE Akin and therefor wasn't able to give Akin what he needed. In episode 7, he could have repeated that mistake. I do think Jin was remorseful. I think he -WOULD- have groveled, and would have spent the rest of his life trying to make it up to Akin. I think he would have delivered Johnny's (metaphorical) head on a platter. I think he would have burned down the theater and his career and raged in defense of Akin. That man has shown us, and Akin, repeatedly that he is in it for the long haul.

There is a great irony in that as much as I wanted a bigger and better apology, I think that Jin apologizing in that way would have been another way to fail Akin. Because the big apology would have been about Jin's feelings, about making himself feel better. But I think his true was redemption is that he was able to step out of his own feelings, and once again see Akin and what Akin needed.

Jin apologized, but Akin didn't want it and couldn't tolerate it. Akin didn't need Johnny's head. Akin didn't need Jin to set the world on fire in anger and vengeance. Akin didn't need an apology. It causes me great pain that despite all MY anger and rage, that Akin wasn't angry. Akin didn't blame Jin. Akin wasn't mad. Akin was heartbroken. Akin blamed himself. Akin was full of shame.

Jin gave Akin everything he needed. Jin gave Akin his body back- by giving him the knowledge that he had not been violated in the way he feared most.* Jin gave Akin his innocence back- by giving him the knowledge that he hadn't done anything wrong. Jin gave Akin his heart back - by giving him the knowledge that he was loved and cherished.

I see you have a problem with my female shikigamis, I can fix that.

The Yin-Yang Master: Dream of Eternity 阴阳师：晴雅集

Ahhh! Thank you again 🤣

ZYZ + ZYC = 20. Kiss on a scar ♥️

Amazing choice, thank you! This one went a little maudling...

I'm still taking prompts! You can find the full list here, or feel free to make up a fun addition to the list~

Zhao Yuanzhou forgets at times how easily humans scar. How they carry the visual, visceral evidence of their defeats or their victories on their bodies for the entirety of their short lifespans. He shudders at the thought: if one had to wear one's scars for life, at his age he might be covered in scars. It's probably for the best he can heal himself as well as he can.

Next to him on the bed Zhou Yichen sleeps on, unaware he is being watched so carefully. He claims he sleeps better when someone is with him, and to his credit Zhao Yuanzhou hasn't seen him have any nightmares on any of the nights they spent together. If he makes sure to thoroughly exhaust Zhou Yichen before he falls asleep, well, one does what one must to help a friend avoid nightmares.

The sweat they worked up together has since dried on Yichen's skin, but the smell of them still lingers in the room. These quiet moments feel like a luxury, and he would wake Yichen to share the moment, but waking him would break the moment too, and Yichen would not appreciate being woken for anything other than an emergency.

So Zhao Yuanzhou luxuriates in the peace alone, remembering the scars that cross Yichen's shoulders, the one round arrow scar next to his navel, the barely-visible scars on his hands. To say Zhou Yichen isn't self conscious about them would be a lie, but he forgets to hide himself between moans and sighs as they spend an evening in each other's company. It is only afterwards that he remembers, and they both pretend Zhao Yuanzhou hasn't long seen the past Yichen carries with him on his skin, like he didn't kiss the same expanse of flesh moments or hours ago.

Zhou Yichen rolls onto his side, his back now to Zhao Yuanzhou. Normally Zhao Yuanzhou would take this opportunity to lie down beside him, to pull him close, and fit them together in a way that will help him trap Yichen in bed come morning. Tonight, instead, he sits up, leaning on one hand as he reaches out and slides Yichen's shirt off his shoulder.

Lean muscles shrug in response to the cold, but Zhou Yichen doesn't wake. Instead he curls in on himself, pushing his back closer to Zhao Yuanzhou's warmth. In the moonlight the visible scars gleam like pearls, like treasures instead of imperfections.

Zhao Yuanzhou can't help himself– and why should he? He is a demon, after all. He leans in close, running a hand under Yichen's arm and to his chest to hold him in place (to hold him close), and presses a soft trail of kisses along one ridged scar, and down another. Zhou Yichen stirs, but wakes only slowly. Still languid from their earlier efforts, he only moves far enough to open one eye and stare balefully but sleepily and Zhao Yuanzhou.

"What are you doing, you ridiculous demon?"

"Hmm, I'm having my wicked way with you, can't you tell, Xiao Zhuo-daren?" Zhao Yuanzhou teases, lips barely releasing the marked skin under them to form the words.

"Why do you like them so much?" Yichen doesn't even respond to the teasing. It's no fun, except for the fact that Zhao Yuanzhou vividly remembers how he caused his current exhaustion. He finally relents his kisses, and settles down with his chest to Yichen's back, head propped up on one arm to lean over him- to be able to kiss him properly.

"I find it fascinating, the way you humans carry your past with you." 

Judging by his frown, Yichen is not moved by his kiss. "And must you enact this fascination in the middle of the night?"

"Would you prefer I do it during the day instead?" He replies in mock-surprise. They both know the answer to that, and Yichen pulls him into a rough kiss just to shut him up.

"No. Now sleep, you great ape."