If A Worker Who Isn't The Owner Says ANYTHING Similar To "I'm Not Really Supposed To Do This But-" And

reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something

so this happened

I was showing my mom a drawing that I had did recently and she told me that I was getting better at drawing. Which is of course a huge compliment to me, but she also said that she would give one of my doodles tattooed on her.

HIYA, SMART-GUY!

^ i do mean it.

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shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

had to go to the hospital today

it was nothing too serious, it was mainly a appointment that I had to go for and I've been to the hospital several times but I still don't like going to the hospital or going to hospitals in general.

Things that I heard at school today with little to no context

Hey ***** I saw your baby boo on ***** tv(School News)

Guy 1: How do I turn it off? Guy 2: You don’t. Guy 1: I don’t ?!

One of my friends: I did an assignment that no one else did?! (She was gone for a week)

Two girls, laughing in a corner. A guy who is constantly louder: Shhhhhh

A girl talking to her boyfriend: Can you stop? Oh my god.

A girl working on her worksheet: I knew I did it right the first time!

One of the exchange students: Yelling at the other in Spanish

My bald male bio teacher: Somebody called me queen today

Guy in bio: She’s not tan! Girl: Yes, I am!

My bio teacher: Are you so insecure that I can’t wear makeup for a play?

Me, mouthing words at my friend: No, stop editing the doc!

Guy 3: She’s different

Friend: Lo. Me:I am writing this in tablet mode!

Guy 4: I can't see. Bio teacher: you will in a moment.

Another friend: As long as you're throwing up Westside, gang signs are fine. (I heard this in passing so I have no idea if this is actually what she said.)

One of my choir teachers: cause you're confident babe. (This was said in the most serious tone I’ve ever heard come out of this man’s mouth)

This all happened within the spand of 3 class periods.

hrmm... sixer.

(click for high quality)

Gloves are so hard to type in

I have marching band gloves on rn

The sooner you reblog this, the funnier it is