“Oh What A Funny/relatable/interesting And Innocuous Post, Let Me Just Reblog-“

double trouble!

+ individuals

When did we all start accepting the wizard rp as a regular part of this site

NOTHING makes me more mad than people shoving aside creepy behavior just because the person in question is neurodivergent and doesn't pick up on social skills well. there was this girl in high school who got way too touchy with me no matter how many times I told her to stop and the fucking school guidance counselor and school psychologist were like "well you can't blame her because she can't pick up on social cues well". i'm neurodivergent too but if someone begs me to stop doing something it's kind of fucking clear they don't like it???

just the way people approach neurodivergency is so infantilizing I hate it. if you ever reblog a post about how it's ableist to react angrily to someone invading your space i'll fucking kill you. half the things you guys call ableism are just straight up not, and this isn't even a tumblr thing, it's something supposed medical professionals believe.

btw when you send an ask and i dont reply and you send it again i see it both times. it doesn’t make me want to reply any more the second time

We need to keep making 9/11 jokes until some corporation tries to jump in on the meme and gets promptly executed by the public

Whenever I see aro/ace discourses and whether they belong in LGBTQ+ spaces, my initial thought is always the same:

Who are you to decide?

What none tells you about being on aromantic and/or asexual spectrum is how isolating it is. You feel lonely. And it's constant. Lonliness because of identity isn't always overwhelming, but it's present somewhere deep down. You feel lonely not because of lack of sexual/romantic attraction but because of society and amatonormativity.

When I was in elementary school, all my friends had crushes. I never understood that because even if I liked someone, it was always in platonic way. They insisted I couldn't possibly not like anyone and I felt forced to fake a crush. In middle school people started dating each other and I comforted myself with "I'm too young for that, time will come". By the high school I already knew something was "wrong" with me, I wasn't like the others. People began having sex not because they were expected to do that but because they actually wanted to. That was such shock to me, I thought media was exaggerating with passion and attraction but apparently all those things happen irl too. Hence I realized I was "the weird one". I forced myself to have same experiences but it felt more like obligation to me than something I trully wanted. I felt dirty after being touched, it repulsed me. I felt like something is broken within me for not enjoying sex. I could never fall in love. People called me coldhearted, they thought something was wrong with me. Few therapist tried to "fix" me, even set me up on dates. I internalized all of that and began seeing myself as "not normal".

Now that I'm older and know there's nothing wrong with me or being aroace, I still can't shake years and years of "I'm not normal" I experienced. It still haunts me. I hear someone talking about their sexual experiences and part of me still feels "not normal" when seeing how "normal" people live. I feel lonely. Parents insist I must find a partner one day. They don't believe i don't experience romantic attraction towards other people. Outside of aspec communities online, I don't experience any support. When I step outside, I still feel like something is wrong with me. Intentionally or not, society still makes me feel like an outsider. It's because of amatonormativity that roots too deep.

There's nothing wrong with people being romantic or sexual, far from that - but vast majority of cishet folks out there expect me to act same as them. Mere thought of someone looking at me as sexual being makes me cringe. I never felt romantic attraction towards anyone. I don't want to be in a relationship - I'm different from the "rest". It's lonely. Felling of isolation became association to me as part of identity. I don't even form closer platonic bonds because inevitable question of my romantic/sex life would inevitably come. For the longest time I felt like I needed to censor that part of myself. I assimilate with surroundings and hope noone finds out my "little secret".

If we as society educated kids more about LGBTQ+ stuff, then maybe this chronic feeling of isolation in aspec communities would diminish in few generations. However what I can say is that from very early age I experienced romantic/sexual attraction very different from what is considered "standard" - and that is why I relate to LGBT experiences innumerous times more than I will to "standard' heterosexual heteroromantic ones.

So stranger on the internet, who are you to swept all my complicated feelings and experiences regarding sexuality under rug because they can't fit in your narrow definition of how romantic and sexual attraction should be.

I love seeing like proper educational YouTube channels read out like patrons because most of them are actual names cause it’s an educational channel but then you just get like fucken AppleSnappz432 in there just sandwiched between two actual people and it’s like the internet just reminding me that it has no sane corner for which to take refuge