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in any sense of words left in him , 𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥.
he had never travelled before in his life, cooped up only in stifling corners of black rooms and choking smell of blood in dark rooms, until a few months later have seen him in SWEDEN. overwhelming than baltimore and its woods, with bustling crowds and big bricked houses and having nowhere familiar to run to; and yet, he finds familiarity in the dark at the back of a truck, with sharp and cold metal promising hurt by the men who drove it somewhere.
‟ ... ❜ he stayed still behind crates, smelling gunpowder and high risks of uncertainty especially as with every bump on the road, he can only hear the wild racing of his heart and the heat of his mother’s palm on his cheeks. careless, reckless, useless —— surely by now with the reminders of the tip of his father’s wrath on his skin, alex would’ve learned a hell of a curve.
unfortunately, getting separated on their first international getaway is unintentionally not on his list; and hopefully, the german words drilled into him before they get there is enough to keep him alive. before then, escaping capture from an accidental kidnapping - - alex made sure not to make a trace of life when he chose this as a hiding spot - - is the topmost priority. honestly, he should’ve checked the truck first if there’s someone in there before he jumped in to hide ... STUPID !
‟ 𝗧𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝗿, 𝗜 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱'𝘃𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗻 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗜 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗜 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝘆𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳, 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝘀𝗮𝗶𝗱 ' 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐥 ' . ❜
‟ 𝙃𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙣 𝙗𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙨... 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴'𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄. 𝗦𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝘆𝗯𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂, 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗹𝗲𝘁 𝗴𝗼. ❜
‟ 𝗕𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝘁𝗼𝗴𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿, 𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲. 𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗯𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗼𝗻 𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗺𝘆 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗼𝗳 𝗮 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗳𝗶𝘁, 𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘁. ❜ jabbing , as neil gives a POINTED LOOK towards the seething ex-raven; own tongue held back in defense of giving patience and truth to what he tries to preach and act upon. he did soften his tone after, though resuming sternness in his words, knowing kevin is highly stressing right now and it sometimes try to bring neil’s nerves to tense with it.
‟ 𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄. 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗱 𝗱𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝗶𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘄𝗮𝘆. 𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁, 𝗞𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗻. 𝗕𝗲𝘀𝗶𝗱𝗲𝘀 —— 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝘀𝗼 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗺𝗲 𝗮𝘀 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗮𝘀 𝗜 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂. ❜
nonchalant compliance, he figured was as good as anything. It was still different from a flat out rejection. He’d had plenty of those. And even through the obvious indifference in the other boy, Isaac found an excuse to smile. To cound this moment, however small, as one of the rare wins he could have in the year. He was right after all ─ new kids didn’t last very long here. And if he was smart, it would be better to cut his losses now and move on.
Obviously, he wasn’t.
He figured, it would be some nice change, at the least. To know there was one other person at school that didn’t mind if he sat beside them or not.
Fingers combed through his curly hair; trying to unravel the right words to make what he thinks make sense without it being creepy. Maybe Stefan would understand. Maybe even he felt it too. That knowing feeling of standing in front of the same mirror reflecting the same thing. But he bit his tongue and swallowed it.
Shrugging instead.
“ Dunno. Maybe I just like you. “
Even after he said it, he wasn’t sure if that was worse or better. But at least it was slightly true.
𝗡𝗢𝗡𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗟𝗔𝗡𝗧 𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗗𝗦 thrown out and about , strung with indifference towards the creeping anxiety that slides upwards within stefan’s chest ; one step closer to choking him from the confusion and fear muddled in the back of his throat. ‘ maybe ’ pertains to uncertainty , one he hates and accustomed to , while ' like ’ associates with the blooms ‘pon cheek and wrath faced in weeks.
obviously, this is going to be a 𝗕𝗔𝗗 𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗔 .
‟ ͏𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁. ❜ straightforward without eyes looking straight forward , body tensing uncontrollably as he crosses his arms; his figure as if embracing himself from an unexpected hostile attack. there persists bitterness in the pit of his stomach , annoyed how isaac can just say whatever he wants without repercussions while stefan won’t ―― can never. ‘ i don’t get it ’ - - are the words stuck with tongue held back and instead had to give a response so uncaring , but then again , stefan is supposed to be 𝗗𝗘𝗙𝗘𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗗 , 𝗣𝗔𝗦𝗦𝗜𝗩𝗘 , 𝗡𝗨𝗠𝗕 ... a boy whose way too different from nathaniel. ( or maybe they’re not so different, after all; sporting similar bruises, broken bones and patches of skin healed and cut all over. )
‟ ͏ ―― 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 ... 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗼𝗿 𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹. 𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗶𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗹𝗹 𝗯𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝘀𝗼𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗿 𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝘄𝗮𝘆. ❜
‟ No one asks you to. ❜ damage control is already underway , with what transpired of misunderstandings between the players ... which can prove a bit inconvenient for neil’s interests if left unchecked. after all , he’s just here to play. ‟ And no one is expecting anyone , really. Unless they have the balls to speak up , they could’ve already said shit right from the start. ❜
░ ┊ @stckhlmr 。•◞
“ i am not taking the fall for that. ” // @jozthen
░ ┊ @rexquondcm 。• ◞
𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐒 𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐀𝐍 𝐔𝐍𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐑 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐏𝐓, staying in a single place for too long a luxury he no longer possesses ; as acquainted with the plated steel & polished glass of airport terminals as with the grime smeared tarmac of inner London. Nostalgia thick on his tongue, analogous to the taste of ash. ❛ Honestly ? I’m not sure nice is the word I would use. ❜ He glances up then, eyes dappled shades of cornflower. ❛ Perhaps taxing might be a more accurate description. ❜
accent reminiscent flashes back such visits to england, back when nathaniel has been taken by his mother to pay courtesy with her side of the family for a couple of times. weeks before they come back to baltimore until now, he can’t fully trust the memories of what he can’t entirely remember; so he might as well discard them. as far as he knows, he hasn’t officially met uncle stuart and that side of the family ... and he hopes not to.
‟ Ah, considering the long travel by connecting flights ... ❜ oliver would know after first class tickets doesn’t serve him anymore. the conversation is a polite one, as an alternative to what oliver usually does in forced silence —— scrape nails, dig within flesh, have to hear loops of voices he’d rather not entertain. talking helps distract from the pain, and helps find out something regarding the newcomer, who has given oliver relief since he’s not the one in the spotlight anymore. ‟ No wonder. How you can take everything in one stride ... despite the excessive noises and treatment. I suppose it’s not nice of an experience as well ... ? ❜
░ ┊ @gcroinya 。• ◞
@jozthen said: it’s nothing. it’s just a bruise.
Inquisitive gaze lingers, scolding and relentless. One that wordlessly whispers ‘should’ve known better’ every chance it gets. Words are not needed, her expression says it all and, really, is there something left to say but at all? Sometimes a bruise is just a bruise, god knows she had her fair share of those marking every inch of pale skin; like a map of violence, only there was never any treasure to find.
“Listen, kid, you might have charm, but your right hook is abysmal.” She holds nothing back, rarely does. Not that bite that drips form her words, not that grin that tugs at the corners of her mouth. Learning how to defend oneself is vital, at least in her books, and that will be the topic she settles on. Not the bruise, pale and blue, not the implication that it carries.
Water drips down her wrist from the bag of ice she’s holding. They ran out of ice-packs long long time ago, so a couple of cubes wrapped in a towel will have to do. It’s a gesture that counts, is it not? “Maybe we should work on that next time.”
miscellaneous angst starters. || not accepting
he is not built to stand his ground —— his mother made sure of that. better to outrun the nightmares than getting caught back up in them. so natha - - neil learns to bite back complaints , or ‘ whining ’ as mary would’ve placed it if she were still alive , from the other person who at least gave a shit in giving him a fighting chance. literally.
‟ What about the left ? Fared better ? ❜ the brunet reaches for the damp compress; iciness begin to numb fingers that clenched tighter and hurt less than the pain they have to endure against the californian sand. carefully situating the wet bag against his left cheek , liking how the cold dissipates heat and relieves him ... before placing it on his right side to hold it there. the boy shifts slowly and checks which is movable and which is tolerable , assessing damage.
looking up from the floor he sits on , observing the other of unknown origins. how she didn’t mince anything with neil , like his mother did , and how he tries to hold back the fear slowly creeping in his chest. as much as he has respect in females , he thinks how terrifying it would be if they met before within his father’s business circles and that neil couldn’t remember; how this woman could’ve had a hand in teaching him , just like his father instructed lola to teach him. he frowns and ignores the awful turning of his guts inside.
‟ I don’t know why ... you’re doing this. ❜ neil begins with a cautious tone , choosing wise words that won’t offend the lady. why now , of all times , did a beacon appear when he’s almost tipped to the edge , ready to give up ? ‟ What do you get out of it ? ❜
░ ┊ @shedetect 。• ◞
“𝚒 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔,” she returns with a grin before focusing once more on the locked for in front of her. “now, do you happen to have any thin, metal objects handy?”
by some reason, he finds the statement suitable as a way to ... what, show how awed he is with ... this.
‟ ... Why are you doing this ? ❜ the boy replies suspiciously, instead of responding with handing over his emergency tools hidden in clothes and shoes too big for him. the easier it is to obscure them from view. his arms kept crossed to himself, hands held forearms whilst he studies the proper way to address the situation. for all neil knows, she can be reporting him now to the school about his breaking and entering whenever he pleases, but she still isn’t. ‟ You ... can’t be doing this for free. I’M NOT A CHARITY CASE. ❜
░ ┊ @scarfwere 。• ◞
a good friend. When did he last have one? Matt? He guessed, if he ever counted as one. A small tentative smile. A faint tilt of his head and he catches wind of the good breeze before it finds him. Him still unsure even when it comes.
Eventually, it breaks out into a grin. A small one. Not large enough that it takes all over his face but good enough to make a dent. He almost turns around to double check ; make sure his Father wasn’t around to ruin it. But a surreptitious glance over his shoulder confirms what he felt in the moment : relief.
“ so ── we’re still friends? “
people like him, his mother and he, don’t have friends. by definition, a ‘ friend ’ is one of her connections forging high-quality documents for them to pass through airports or one of those old ones who are now chasing them to the ends of the earth. stefan hears it coined a lot around as he gets by and wonders how easily the term draws such warm expression on isaac’s face. as if stefan wouldn’t be gone after a few months’ time and wouldn’t be forgotten ... just like the rest of his other selves.
‟ Can’t really stop you from doing whatever you want. ❜ the raven-haired boy shrugs, as indifference lace with a piss poor excuse that he can fall back onto, a reason why he allowed whatever this is to happen. at the end of the day, stefan will still be put down and with him, are memories of a mediocre, normal boy’s life. as much as stefan can already feel the ire of his mother once she finds out and when she does, the pounding within his chest covered by nonchalance overlapped the threat of her wrath and even if he doesn’t understand why isaac seemed cautious despite his insistence on keeping a connection with stefan, he doesn’t bother poking into it.
‟ Usually, everyone doesn’t see the point of entertaining new kids for far too long; they come and go and fade away within a week. What’s up with you ? You seem hell-bent into ... whatever you’re up to. ❜ if stefan also sports NATHANIEL’s similar bluntness and lack of effort to understand social cues, he also doesn’t bother thinking much about it.
‟ ... Most of the strongest people I know are women. ❜
▬▬▬▬ &; @shedetect , sc.
░ ┊ @im-possiblelimits 。• ◞
“what makes you think i have something to say?” & since when has he needed anyone’s permission to say what’s on his mind?
‟ Anyone can feel your eyes digging in their back whenever you think they’re not looking. ❜ if it sounds like an accusation, so be it; he’s had enough of kevin’s bullshit of the day. ‟ Whatever I did wrong, let’s just get it over with. ❜
‟ Did you say something ? I just disconnected for a moment there. ❜
▬▬▬▬ &; @traumawon , sc.
‟ Just because you can do it doesn’t mean everyone else can. CUT ME SOME SLACK —— I’ve never played much like this before. ❜ oh, and how he envies kevin for it.
▬▬▬▬ &; @hcathens , sc.
‟ Must be nice to have been from out of country. What’s it like ? ❜
▬▬▬▬ &; @rexquondcm , sc.
‟ If you have something to say, JUST SPIT IT OUT . ❜
▬▬▬▬ &; @im-possiblelimits , sc.
verses tag dump.
v*. BURNED TO THE FILTER WITHOUT TAKING A DRAG. / undetermined. v001. THE FOXHOLE COURT / this is the moment you stop being the rabbit. v002. THE RAVEN KING / they were worth every cut‚ bruise and scream. v003. THE KING’S MEN / fight because you don’t know how to die quietly.