The Last Of Us - Blog Posts

I guess some ppl don’t realize that makeup/costume is a part of acting and a major part of portraying a role. Yeah Bella looked young in S1, she was supposed too. And Ellie in the game looks young too because she is (19 in the 2nd game) and she still looks young then underneath the blood, and dirt caked on her face and clothes, which will be part of the costuming. You ‘can’t imagine Bella being menacing’? Did you not see episode 8 in S1? That there is proof she can act menacing, Bella’s a great actor no doubt about that. If you don’t like the casting so much then don’t watch it.

Plus you mentioned Abby being a ‘hulkette’ but I don’t see you complaining about Kaitlyn Dever not looking strong enough or having enough muscle compared to Abby in the game. I wonder why.

It’s telling how these kinds of people take every criticism to mean, “you just want your fuck the actor!” They completely ignore 90% of people are complaining about the casting because Bella looks like a 9 year old and they’re 5’1”…

Bella worked in the first season because, while not looking like Ellie from the game, they pulled off the “I’m a kid” phenotype and captured the spirit of Ellie. Bella can act.

The problem isn’t even Bella’s height since canon Ellie is 5’3”. The problem is that Bella, for me, can’t pull off the menacing tone because of how they look.

If Bella played some 15th century queen with the pale white face and recessed hairline, they’d be amazing for the role. Maybe some Victorian woman. They have that phenotype; like a painting. And they pulled it off when they ware meant to be 14 in s1 despite looking younger. But Bella doesn’t look 19. Bella looks 9. I can’t see them holding their own against the hulkette that is Abby.

Okay, TLOU fans! When that scene happens in season 2 we need to defend Abby's actress at all costs!

We are not repeating history! Laura Bailey didn't deserve it and neither does Kaitlyn Dever!

They are actresses, not the character.

ellie's girlfriend (ellie x f!reader) headcanons.

you're gonna go on LOTS of dates. of course, you're going to be primarily focused on surviving together since it would just be the two of you. but, you and ellie would still find any and all possible opportunities to go off on a little date together. those "little dates" could vary from anything from a night of stargazing on a rooftop, to reading out your favorite lines from a joke book that you have shared with each other ever since the start of your relationship. whatever the case, they're always filled with laughter and affection from both you and ellie.

of course, there's going to be some fights here and there, given that you're both teenaged girls enduring the grueling post- apocalyptic world. but, you always end up together in the end, surviving side-by-side, from dusk 'til dawn.

scenario #1) you were with ellie when she was bitten, and you were terrified. although you were lucky to have not gotten bitten, you still feared the moment ellie would change to be unrecognizable. you made ellie perform "tests" every morning you woke up and every night before going to sleep. the tests were always the same: you had ellie count to ten slowly and clearly, and hold her arm out to keep it steady before you were sure that she hasn't turned into a monster, yet.

scenario #2) tragically, you were both bitten by clickers one day after being ambushed. at first, neither of you knew what to do, and contemplated on simply ending it all together. or, you thought that you could wait it out and lose your shit together. either way, you were both going to be together through the end. however, that wouldn't turn out to be the case. ellie was immune, but you quickly showed signs of sickness a few hours after being bitten. this would lead to ellie's worst fear coming true: ending up alone.

divider by @reveriesources.

Want to add a favorite not on here-

Agatha All Along

Also I’ll take any excuse to post some Agathario:

me consuming every piece of queer media instead of having a social life:

Gay people will be like “this is my comfort show!” And then show you the most emotionally devastating, stress-inducing, tragic piece of media you have ever witnessed

22/04/23: GOD, THIS STORY IS JUST SO WONDERFUL!!! i binged through the whole thing this morning and my brain can’t focus on anything else. i have so favorite many parts i wanna properly highlight later but “You stay on my left, and I’ll stay on your right.” REALLY GOT ME!!!

the dynamic between joel and reader is too good to be true, you’re building something wonderful here. i love their interactions so much and the interactions they have with the other characters, like ellie and tommy <3

“Fix her leaky tap my ass,” Tommy muttered, earning him a grunt from Joel.”

and i also love that you made her stand her ground!!! NO DAMSELS IN DISTRESS HERE!!! although there will be a lot of distress to come apparently jefhhshddh

everyone is so in character it’s truly insane like THIS IS ALL CANON TO ME NOW IDC, your attention to detail and their mannerisms and the way the TALK TO EACH OTHER just makes sense and it clicks and it’s perfect.

i send you an anon talking about how much i’m loving the story but it wasn’t enough i need to run my mouth a bit more!!!

reader’s backstory and what we know about her so far, her relationship with cal and everything just brings so much more depth to her and how she is able to connect with joel and WHY THE FIT!!! it’s so well written (as is everything you’re writing) and i think it just makes her such a memorable character.

“Walk of shame,” Cal crooned lovingly from the kitchen table when you returned home. You flicked him off with a laugh, hanging up your coat. “Seriously, do you even live here anymore?” THIS BROUGHT SUCH A STUPID SMILE TO ME LIFE!!!

i’m also fucking loving the SUBPLOT THAT’S HAPPENING I SEE YOU!!! the moment you said the new guy was from “CAN-” i already started to 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 and yeah. i don’t trust him. people are going missing. i love the tension it’s bringing to the story and to the scenery that is jackson, because in most fics i’ve been reading it’s almost like a safe haven (which i get and it fits if a story is like that) but i just love your twist on it!!! and i’m so excited to see where it leads everything.

in summary: this is definitely one of the best joel fics i’ve ever read (and just one of the best fics in general) and i’m be so so so excited for the next chapters!!!

under the night | part four

summary: joel can't always be in control

pairing: joel miller x f!reader, set in jackson after the end of tlou part I

warnings/tags: [18+ only, minors dni] language, sex, angst, jealousy, immature/possessive!joel, canon typical violence [infected feature], violence, injury/blood, vomit, hurt/comfort, and so on and so forth

word count: 9k

a/n: teeing things up for the bigger story arc here, and i'd like to clarify this is not a damsel in distress story lol you'll see

part three

The patrolmen in Jackson were dedicated. Every morning, on a rotational basis, a group of them ventured out past the gates of the settlement and explored set routes. They took down infected; they searched for essential items like soaps and medicines; but most all, they kept the town safe. Admittedly, when you first heard them called patrolmen you’d rolled your eyes, knowing damn well there were multiple women doing the job. But Tommy had just shrugged amiably, assuring you that those women weren’t bothered with the title.

That morning in particular, Joel and Tommy were scheduled to do a routine sweep of what they called the “south patrol”. Joel had never complained about how quickly he fell into the job upon his arrival in Jackson. It made sense to Tommy and Maria that he would join the team, considering the vast experience and knowledge he’d acquired in his year roaming cross country with Ellie. Never once had he begrudged his brother for being given a job and a place to live, and a warm home to sleep in.

Until, that is, he had to leave you in his bed for the sake of a fucking patrol.

“Fuck Tommy,” Joel grumbled into your neck. You laughed sleepily, pushing him off you.

“Get out of here, Joel,” you mumbled unconvincingly, rolling over to shove your head back into the pillows. It was earlier than you would’ve chosen to wake up, but you knew there was no hope of drifting back to sleep with the way the sun shone through his large bedroom window.  With a huff, he was getting out of bed, and you listened drowsily to the sound of the shower running, and then to the rustling of him pulling his clothes on.

When a silence settled over the room, you risked opening your eyes a crack, only to see Joel watching you from the doorway.  He stared forlornly, his eyes raking over your naked torso before you yanked the blanket back up to cover yourself.

“You’re makin’ this real hard for me you know,” he said, his forearm propped up against the doorframe. 

You cracked a smile, and let your eyes shut slowly, listening to the sounds of his boots padding softly down the stairs.

A week had passed since your first night together, and it was true that you and Joel struggled to spend more than one consecutive night apart. Laying in his bed, surrounded by the smell of him, you remembered the day after like you were experiencing the moment all over again.

The knock at your front door had come after 10pm, and you’d startled at the sound, wondering who would be bothering you so late. Cal had been out at Louisa’s, so you’d tentatively walked over to the door, opening it just a crack to glance out, and then tugging it open swiftly upon seeing Joel standing on your doorstep. 

“Hey there,” he’d offered a tense smile, eyes flicking down to your feet and then back up to hold your gaze.

You gripped Joel’s pillows and remembered the way he’d stepped inside your home, asking if you were alone.

“I can’t stop thinking about it. About the way you sounded… the way you felt. Can’t get you out of my damn head.”

You were drunk on each other, on the intimacy. Both enveloped in these new and devastatingly consuming feelings for one another that you were finally able to express. In the entire week, you’d only spent one night away from one another, because you had stood your ground and admitted you needed to spend some time with Cal.

From Joel’s bed, you listened to the sounds of Ellie messing around downstairs in the kitchen, no doubt trying to make herself something edible for breakfast. After the teenager had caught you leaving the house, you had been shy around her. You didn’t want your relationship to change because things with Joel had. Although Ellie had seemed enthused by the progression, you feared the dynamic would shift between you, so you tried to remain stealthy with your comings and goings from their home.

When you were sure the younger girl had left the house, you took your time with showering, and dressing for the day.

“Walk of shame,” Cal crooned lovingly from the kitchen table when you returned home. You flicked him off with a laugh, hanging up your coat. “Seriously, do you even live here anymore?”

“Fuck off, man,” you rolled your eyes, settling down in the chair opposite him. You accepted a mug of coffee with a grateful nod, and brought the liquid gold to your lips.

He chuckled quietly, pushing his bowl of oats towards you as a peace offering. You stole his spoon and cleared the rest of the food in minutes.

“How are you though?” he asked after a while, his eyes soft and genuine. You admired him, and the way his blonde hair was getting longer, flopping down over his eyes.

“I’m good, Cal,” you assured.

“You look happy,” he squinted at you, the teasing lilt returning to his voice. “You’ve got the glow of someone who’s finally made some fucking friends.”

“Took a leaf out of your book,” you winked.

Your heart felt full. For so many years, you and Cal had been one another’s salvation. You’d relied on each other for survival, for companionship, but amongst it all, there had been stretches of time so dire that you didn’t laugh for weeks at a time. To be sat with him, in your home, somewhere safe like Jackson, and laughing together… even after so many months there, it still struck you sometimes how lucky you were.

It was a few hours later, when you ventured toward the stables to check in on Dot, that you bumped into Tommy and Joel returning from patrol.

The brothers were putting away their saddles when you pushed the gate open.

Tommy greeted you warmly, although his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. Your gaze drifted slowly from him to his older brother, trying to gage the tense atmosphere.

“Hey guys,” you wrapped your arms around yourself, shivering from the bitter weather. Joel leaned against the stable wall, fiddling with the bit in his hands, his eyes hard on Tommy. “Who died?” 

Joel’s eyes snapped to you, his expression grim.

“Woah,” you said lowly. “What the fuck, did someone actually die?”

“We found a body out there,” Tommy admitted quietly, stealing a glance over his shoulder to check if anyone else was listening.

“Where?”

His face seemed hesitant, as if he were unsure of sharing much information with you. He rubbed the back of his neck in the same way Joel did when he was trying to find the right words. “A few miles away. A woman. No one from here; we didn’t recognise her.”

“Bitten?” you asked quietly, your breaths short. The idea of anyone being outside those gates made your chest hurt suddenly, as the memories of life out there raced through your brain.

“No,” Joel answered gruffly, and you looked at him. “It must’ve been raiders, but the snowfall last night means there wasn’t much for us to do by means of tracking them.”

“We’re going out again tomorrow,” Tommy butt in firmly, staring at his older brother. “I want this shit figured out.”

You didn’t know what made you say it, but the words tumbled from your mouth. All fear forgotten, you blurted, “Let me come with you.”

“What?” Joel huffed sharply, glaring at you. “Fat chance.”

You scowled in his direction, looking at Tommy. “I lived out in the open for years, I can help you with tracking, even through the snow.”

Joel ground out your name, his eyes flashing with a warning that you couldn’t quite decipher.

“She has a point Joel,” Tommy held his hand up towards his brother, stopping the interruption he knew was coming. “Plus, we could use the extra pair of hands. Someone to watch our six.”

You would have never admitted it, but Tommy was right. The concern you felt for Joel all of a sudden was an unwelcome, painful feeling. After the past week, the idea of him going out past the gates made your throat tighten. You wanted to be out there with them, watching their six – keeping him safe.

“I don’t like it,” is all Joel said, eyes staring at the ground. “We can take Jesse.”

He’d rather have a 19-year-old kid on patrol with them, than you?

“Fuck, Jesse. I’ll be here tomorrow morning at 7,” you told Tommy, who nodded once.

“We should get going,” Joel pushed off the wall, and you looked to him in confusion. “I promised you I’d fix that leaky tap in your kitchen.” You didn’t remember ever having a conversation about your kitchen tap, but you nodded slowly anyways, sparing a glance in Dot’s direction before surmising that you’d check in on the horse properly in a few days.

“Fix her leaky tap my ass,” Tommy muttered, earning him a grunt from Joel. He put his hand on the small of your back and encouraged you out of the stables, leaving Tommy laughing as he finished packing up their equipment. 

Walking down the street in the direction of your house, you braced yourself for Joel’s frustration. You could tell he was tense in the stables, and unhappy with your decision. But you couldn’t help the way anxiety ticked away in your chest. Nothing good comes from wanting. Yet there you were, with Joel so close finally, and a reminder had been served to you that he could be taken away so fucking easily. Letting people in meant opening yourself up to pain, and you were suddenly terrified by how fast things were moving between you two; how much he meant to you after a single week of being anything more than friends.

“Joel,” you started quietly.

“We’ll talk about it later,” he said quickly, squeezing your shoulder before lowering his hand once again to rest on your lower back. You nodded slowly, glancing around the street and noticing Rosie Paulson, a girl around Ellie’s age, staring at the pair of you from her front porch. Instinctively, you brushed off Joel’s hand, putting a wider berth between you.  

“That Paulson girl is staring at us like we’re naked,” you explained under your breath, walking faster.

“Nosy fucking kids,” Joel grunted in response, not even glancing in the girl’s direction.

You remembered the impression you’d gotten of Joel when you first arrived in Jackson; that cold, private person who kept to himself. The other people in the town saw the same in him, and you knew it would’ve been cause for curiosity; for them to suddenly spot him walking around town with you by his side.

Your house came into view, and you started to chuckle. “So, what’s all this leaky tap business, Miller?”

He gave a short laugh and looked at you from the corner of his eye. “Honestly?”

“Honestly.”

“Needed an excuse to get you alone.”

You barked out a laugh and led him quickly up the stairs to the front door, unlocking it hastily. Before you were fully inside, his hands were on you, prying the zip of your jacket down.  He kicked the door shut behind him with a slam, and pushed you up against it, his fingers pressing against the skin underneath your shirt. All your anxieties blew away in the wind when you felt his hands on your body.

“Fuck,” you gasped in shock. “Your hands are fucking freezing.”

“Sorry, sorry,” he mumbled into your mouth, pressing his lips to your urgently. “Help me warm ‘em up.” 

Putting your hands on his chest, you pushed him off you. “C’mon,” you encouraged, leading him to your bedroom. It was a painful dichotomy; fearing getting so close to him, so quickly, and yet not being able to keep your damn hands off him. When you clicked the bedroom door closed, you turned to find him standing at the edge of your bed, watching you with dark eyes.

“I really didn’t want to leave this morning,” he spoke lowly. “Wanted to stay in those sheets all wrapped up in you.” Through the admission he seemed somewhat shy, a flush still rising in his cheeks when he bared his feelings to you so honestly. Though you’d spent your nights together, no conversation had been had about what exactly you were doing. You’d admitted you liked being near each other, but not much else. And you decided you were okay with not knowing; if it meant you got to have Joel in any capacity.

You hummed, stepping forward to place your hands on his cheeks, and running your fingers through the coarse bristles of his beard. He leaned in and kissed you gently, his tongue swiping along your bottom lip before pressing eagerly into your mouth. You sighed softly, breathing in the scent of him. Your heart still raced like it was the first time.

You stripped each other’s clothes off hastily, until you were clad in nothing but your underwear, and cold fingers didn’t matter anymore because your skin had grown hot with desire. 

You pushed gently on his chest and when the back of his calves hit the bed, he fell onto it with a huff of surprise. He shuffled backward until his head hit the pillows, and you crawled up to straddle him. Your fingertips trailed lightly over his skin and through the soft smattering of hair on his chest.  

His eyes flashed dark with desire, and he grit his teeth. You felt powerful astride him, with your hands pressing down on his shoulders to keep him pinned to your bed.

“This how you want it?” he rasped.

“What can I say,” you smirked. “Save a horse, ride a cowboy.”

He let out a sharp laugh, but it was cut off by a grunt when you ground down against him. You sighed at the feeling of him pulsing against your core, only two thin pieces of fabric separating you now. His eyes closed involuntarily, face relaxing at the feeling of you rubbing against him. But then they snapped open, trained on you again. You remembered what he’d said during your first time together. I don’t want to miss a single thing.

One of his hands left your waist and drifted between your thighs. He pulled your underwear to the side, and you exhaled heavily as one of his thick fingers dipped between your folds.

“Christ,” he exhaled. “You’re wet already, baby.”

“Can’t help it,” you whimpered, the pet name causing a flood of heat to rip through you. Your stomach tensed as he swirled his fingertip over your entrance, and spread the wetness upward, finally making contact with your pulsing clit.  He drew light circles around it at first, enjoying the way you held your breath at the feeling, and then would sharply gasp for air as he changed his rhythm.

“That feel good?” he asked, watching your expressions.

“So good,” you breathed, eyebrows pulled together tightly as you grinded against his hand.

He slipped a finger inside you, sighing huskily at the feeling of your walls tightening around him. You loved the sounds he made when his hands were on you; as if he would die happy just from having had the chance to touch you. After a moment, he pushed a second digit inside, curling them against your walls and scissoring them, stretching you out for him.

You kissed him messily, teeth nipping at his bottom lip, before running your lips down his jugular. You tried to stop yourself from leaving marks in your wake, although you knew Joel wouldn’t be bothered.

“Fuck Joel,” you huffed, lips pausing on his skin when his fingers hit a particularly sensitive spot inside you. “Stop.”

His hand stilled instantly, eyes searching your face in confusion.

“I need to fuck you,” you said firmly, pushing his hand away from your body and leaning back to tug your panties down your legs. Joel followed suit, desperately yanking his briefs down his legs before grabbing your hips to pull you back over him. Unintentionally, when you rested above him, the head of his cock nudged against your folds, and he moaned deeply.

“God,” you sighed, reaching down to grip him in your hand. You pushed his head through your folds, letting your slick coat his already weeping tip.

He groaned your name, fingertips digging into your hipbones. “Love how wet you get for me.”

You whined and couldn’t help but press your entrance down onto his head, longing to feel him inside of you. But common sense flared in the back of your mind, and you reached over desperately to grab a condom from the bedside table. Shuffling down to sit on his thighs, you ripped open the foil with your teeth, enjoying the way he stroked his cock and watched you with hooded eyes.

You knocked his hand away to roll the latex down his length, giving him a firm tug once it was on. Not wasting a second, he lined himself up to your entrance, and you sunk down onto his length.

You gasped, eyes shutting instinctively. For all the nights you’d spent together that week, it was the first time you’d ridden him. The position helped him hit a spot so deep inside that it had you seeing stars behind your eyelids.

“God damn it,” Joel spat, eyes rolling back in his head. One of his hands gripped the blanket, and the other held your waist in a vice grip.

“Shit Joel,” you whimpered. “You’re so deep like this, f-fuck.” Your breathless tone drove him crazy, and he begged you to move.

“You can take it, darlin’,” he encouraged. “Show me how well you can take me.”

You clenched around him, your slick dripping down and coating both of your thighs. Slowly, you lifted up before dropping back down, crying out as he instantly hit that spot inside of you again. Hungry for more, you got to work; lifting up and grinding down in a beautiful rhythm that had him making filthy sounds beneath you, reaching up to pinch and tug on your nipples. 

“Look so fucking good like this,” he grunted, his eyes flicking between your face and the way your tits bounced with every movement.

You grabbed his hands and shoved them into the pillows beside his head, leaning over him so he could suck one of your nipples into his mouth. He moaned into your skin, nipping gently at the painfully tight buds. With your torso bent forward, your clit brushed deliciously against the coarse hair at his base, and you couldn’t help but just grind yourself against him for a moment, letting out soft whines.

“That’s it, baby,” he groaned into your chest. “Fuck yourself against me.”

With the sensation of him deep inside you, and the friction on your clit, an orgasm hit you out of nowhere. You cried out in shock, gripping his shoulders as your body bowed into his chest.

“Fuck,” he yelled into your skin, his hands wrapping around your back to hold you to him. You’d come to learn that your orgasm was often what pushed him over the edge, and could tell he was holding back, waiting.

Your body was shaking as the pleasure rolled through you, and Joel’s mouth sponging kisses across your chest did nothing to lessen the intensity of the moment. As your body relaxed, he began nudging his hips upwards, making you whimper.

“Not done with you yet, baby,” Joel rasped, his fingers dragging down your back as he fucked up into you. He was so thick, so heavy, inside you, and even in the minutes after an orgasm, you had to steel yourself in preparation for another. With all your strength, your pushed herself back into a seated position.

“You’re too far away,” he grunted, attempting to push himself up so you were chest to chest.

“Uh uh,” you tutted breathlessly. Your hands were on his chest, holding him against the bed. “Thought you didn’t wanna miss a thing, Miller? Watch me.”

His eyes flicked down from your face to your chest, your stomach, all the way down to where you were connected. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and his neck was flushed red. You could only imagine that you looked the same way, as your chest heaved with exhausted breaths.

“So beautiful,” he breathed out, and your cheeks burned. The moment was almost too intense. Post orgasm, with him deep inside of you, saying words you struggled to accept about yourself.

“Fuck me,” you begged him, and he obliged.  

His grip on your waist was bruising, using his strength to hold you still while he thrust up into you. You were sure there would be fingerprint shaped marks on you the next day, and the thought made you shiver.

“Y’feel so,” he grunted. “So fuckin’ good for me.”

You leaned back and rested your hands on his thighs for leverage, moaning lowly at the new, tighter angle.

“Oh,” you sighed. “Oh, you’re gonna make me cum again, Joel.”

He cursed loudly, his rhythm breaking for a second before starting up again at a faster rate. “C’mon,” he encouraged, dark eyes bearing into yours. Holding his gaze, a shiver ran down your spine as you noted a hint of frustration. Joel was being rough, pounding into you with no mercy, desperate for you to cum again. It seemed the tension from the conversation in the barn hadn’t disappeared entirely.

Choked sobs fell from your mouth involuntarily as he bounced you on top of him. His teeth were gritted as he snarled, “Want to feel you cum all over my cock. I know you can.”

His words were enough to send you over the edge a second time, and a guttural cry tore out of your throat as you toppled into your orgasm. Joel followed close behind, his hips snapping messily into yours over and over again, while he let out rough curses and mumbles of your name.

Heavy breaths filled the air around you as you collapsed onto his chest. You left feather soft kisses along his collarbones, your eyes closed in exhaustion. He gripped your waist and spun you slowly so your back hit the pillows, before pulling himself out of you.

“I meant it,” he said a short while later. You’d cleaned up and were laying in bed, hands stroking each other’s skin absentmindedly. You looked at him in confusion. He reached out and traced a finger along the scar on your cheek. “You’re so beautiful.”

You cringed quickly, tucking your face into the pillow.

“Don’t do that,” he pleaded in a whisper. “Don’t hide from me.”

“It’s hard,” you muttered, still not meeting his eye-line. “This all feels very… intense.”

He nodded slowly, eyes watching you warily. “Is that… bad?”

“It’s not bad,” you rushed out. “It’s just different. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a… a you.”

“Long time for me too,” he said. You stared at each other for a moment, not saying anything. Finally, you leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips.

“I need to eat something,” you mumbled into his mouth, eager to change the subject. “Or I’m gonna pass out.”

“Can’t have that. Need you to keep your energy up,” he replied, his palm gripping your ass quickly. “Can’t have you tirin’ out on me.”

You scoffed, jumping off the bed to tug on a pair of underwear and a random singlet.

As you walked down the hallway into the kitchen, he called out, “I’m hungry too!” You replied with a laugh, and a “yeah yeah!”

You rifled through the kitchen cabinets for a few minutes and contemplated heating up a can of soup, until your eyes landed on the bag of oranges you’d picked up a few days beforehand.

You grabbed one with an eager smile, and began pealing the rind over the sink, not noticing the front door opening in your periphery.

“Jesus, aren’t you cold, freak?”

“Shit!” you jumped, almost dropping the fruit. “You scared me.”  

Cal was leaning against the kitchen doorway, staring at you in incredulity.

“Not my fault you’re wandering around in your underwear with your head up in the clouds,” he was laughing.

“Shh, shh,” you hushed him with a snort. “Joel’s here.”

“Oh shit,” Cal said, eyes wide with mischief. “Grumpy old Joel Miller in our house?”

“Give it a rest,” you rolled your eyes, starting up on your peeling again. “How was your day?”

“It was good,” he trailed off, eyes flicking down the hall over your shoulder. You could hear Joel’s footsteps approaching the kitchen, but held focus on the orange, tearing white strands off the juicy flesh. Your cheeks flushed at what the two of you must’ve looked like; half dressed, with messy hair and tired eyes.

“Hey Joel,” Cal nodded politely, raising his hand in a wave.  

Joel settled directly behind you, and your eyes went wide when you felt his bare chest press against your back, and his hand come down to land on your stomach. His long fingers splayed against you, pinkie resting dangerously close to the band of your underwear.

“Howdy,” he said quietly. His thumb toyed with the hem of your singlet, brushing underneath the fabric along your bare skin. You turned your head slightly to see Joel out of the corner of your eye, but he was staring directly at Cal. Your heart started to beat a little faster at the sudden awkward tension in the air. What was he doing?

Joel’s face was devoid of emotion, even the skin between his eyebrows was uncharacteristically smooth. But everything his face hid, his body language screamed. His knee brushed against the back of your leg, and where the contact would normally have made you shiver, you found herself stunned into silence by what you realised was a clear display of possessiveness. Joel was marking his territory in front of Cal, and you wanted no fucking part in it.

“How are you?” Cal asked warily, clearly confused by the dynamic between the two of you.

“I’m grand,” Joel said with a tone of finality, and no indication of wanting to continue the conversation. Your brain flashed back to the first time you’d met him, and what you’d thought; rude motherfucker. The adoration you’d felt for the man only minutes before was long gone, replaced with a burning frustration at his behaviour.

The silence was agonising, but you didn’t know how to break it. Cal fidgeted, eyes glancing at Joel’s hand before looking to the floor uneasily. Your stomach twisted as Joel leaned down a pressed a chaste kiss to the side of your neck. Cal cleared his throat into his elbow and finally muttered something about heading over to Louisa’s. Willing yourself to move, you gripped Joel’s hand and pried it off you. You turned and stalked back towards the bedroom; the orange forgotten on the counter.

When he entered the room behind you, you spun around angrily. “What the hell was that?”

“What?” he asked innocently, hands raised in the air.

“You practically propped your leg up and pissed on me back there,” you grunted. “Like a dog marking your fucking territory.”

He said your name softly, arms lowering.

“Don’t say my name like that,” you said. “What the hell was that?”

“What, I can’t touch you?” he asked defensively.

“Did you see how uncomfortable he was? Your hand was practically up my shirt!”

“Well good,” he growled, and you paused, mouth falling open. “Maybe I wanted to set the record straight.”

“Set the record…” you stared at him wide eyed. “What the fuck are you talking about, Joel?”

His face relaxed suddenly as he realised how appalled you were by him, and he made a quick step toward you. “Okay, look,” he surrendered, hands reaching out to you. “I’m sorry, okay?”

“Why did you do that?” you pushed, stepping back.

He breathed your name again, his eyes darting to stare at the wall. He gripped his hands together in front of him, cracking his fingers roughly. “Look, I-I can’t help but think about you and him living in this house together sometimes… knowing what I kno-“

“Jesus Christ,” you interrupted, pulling a pair of trousers from the chest of drawers, and beginning to tug them up your legs.  

“Now listen,” he said from behind you. “I’m sorry, but-“

“But what, Joel?” you turned back, zipping your pants. “I was honest with you, before any of this started between us. I told you more about my history, including what happened with Cal, than I have with another person, ever. I trusted you, thought you’d take it at face value. But then here you are, on a weird possessive kick, trying to lay some sort of claim on me in front of him? Cal is like my fucking brother, I told you that.”

“I do trust you, but I doubt it’s the fuckin’ same for him,” he ground out, his face reddening. This wasn’t the soft spoken, kind man you had gotten so close with. He was frustrated and angry, and you didn’t like this side to him. “What am I supposed to think? How do I know that he’s not just holdin’ out hope, waitin’ for you to change your mind?”

It was as though all the tension from the past few hours bubbled up inside of you. The stern words in the barn, Joel thinking he could make decisions for you, stop you from coming on patrol. And now this. If anybody else in Jackson dared to do these things, try to tell you what to do, you’d have their fucking tongue for it.

“Because you’re wrong!” you shouted, unable to help yourself. Your chest was heaving with sharp breaths; the situation astounded you. Is he fucking serious? “And you know what Joel, Cal will always be in my life. He’s been with me for a long time before you, and he’ll be with me for a long time after you. And if you can’t fucking handle that, then I don’t know what to tell you.”

Your mouth had moved faster than your brain, and you regret the phrasing as soon as it came out. But it was too late to take it back, so you steeled your shoulders and held your ground. Joel’s face fell quickly, his mouth turning down in dismay.

After you, you’d said. After you.

His hurt expression made your chest ache, but he cleared his throat and covered it up in a second.

“Well then,” he nodded, bending down to yank his clothes off the floor. He dressed in silence, not looking at you again, before turning and walking out of the room. You watched him leave with wide eyes, tears threatening your water line. Left standing alone in the house, you could only wonder what the fuck had just happened. Maybe you’d been right; wanting never brings anything good.

The nightmares returned that night. After a long week of peaceful deep sleep, the fear was paralysing, and somehow, you’d forgotten just how awful it felt. You slept fitfully, drifting in and out with no reprieve from your own mind.

By the time 6am rolled around, you tore out of bed to start the day. Washing your face in the bathroom, you ran your finger along the scar on your cheekbone, glaring at your reflection. No matter what you did, it would serve as a reminder of how weak you’d been made to feel, all those years ago. You weren’t supposed to be beautiful; you were supposed to be strong.  

It was bitterly cold outside. As you trudged towards the stables to meet Joel and Tommy the wind whipped painfully against your skin. Shoving your hands deep in your pockets, you tried to ignore the feelings of regret you had over pushing so hard to come along on the patrol. The argument with Joel rung in your head on a constant loop, and you cringed to think of how tense things were about to be.

His pained expression flashed through your mind, but you willed it away as quickly as it came. You were angry with him. If he’d just told you how he felt, maybe you would have understood, but instead he acted like a child. You rolled your eyes thinking about it. Maybe it was for the best this had happened early on in your... situation with him.

“Oh, hey!” a voice called suddenly, and your head whipped around to spot the newbie jogging in your direction.

“Lincoln,” you nodded at him. “How’re you settling in?”

“Settling in well,” he grinned, his cheeks rosy from the cold. “Surprised to spot anyone else out and about so early.” You gave him a wry smile, doing your best to be polite. It was too early for small talk, and you’d heard from the girls at the stables just how chatty he could be.

“Headed out on patrol,” you said shortly, sighing quietly when he changed his course of direction and fell into step beside you.

“Oh, wow!” he said, too loud for your tired brain. “I thought I’d heard you worked at the stables?”

You could see the barn at the end of the street. So close.

“I normally do, just helping out Tommy this morning.”

“Well,” he stopped walking, and you found yourself pausing too, reminding yourself to be respectful. “I’ll leave you be. Be careful out there. Never know what kind of madness you might come across outside those gates.”

You stared at him for a second, brain struggling to catch up with his shift in tone. Lincoln’s cheery smile was gone, and his face seemed almost solemn as he gave the warning. 

When you didn’t respond for a moment, he spoke again. “You be safe then.”

“Always am,” you quipped, before turning to stalk towards the stables.

Joel and Tommy were already preparing the horses when you arrived. Tommy gave a friendly wave when he spotted you, beckoning you over.

“Morning, you remember how to use one of these?” he held a rifle out to you. 

“Yeah,” you nodded quickly, stealing a glance in Joel’s direction. He was adjusting the saddle on his horse, and didn’t acknowledge your presence. You shouldered the gun and let out a quick huff of exasperation. Fine.

“Joel saddled Dot up for you,” Tommy said. “We’ll head out in a second.”

Your annoyance waned ever so slightly, and you stared at Joel’s back curiously. He still didn’t turn; whatever he was fiddling with on Percy’s saddle must’ve been pretty damn interesting.

“That’s nice,” you muttered.

“Yeah,” Tommy muttered, gaze flitting awkwardly between the two of you when he noted your disingenuous tone. The contrast from when the three of you were last in the stables together was vast, and the younger Miller’s confusion was palpable. 

Joel didn’t say anything as you mounted your horses and rode out of the gates. You hung back, trailing behind their horses while you gained your bearings outside the walls of the settlement.

Large mountains decorated the scene, dusted so beautifully with snow that it would be picturesque if you weren’t so uneasy. It had been so many months since you arrived in Jackson, and being back outside caused your heart rate to kick up a notch. The landscape was vast, and memories of extensive stretches of time spent wandering aimlessly through the country played in your mind. So many cold winters spent hidden in dilapidated buildings, huddled underneath thin blankets, praying you wouldn’t lose your toes to the cold.

“So, we’re going back along the south patrol,” Tommy called back to you. “Same as what we did yesterday. Don’t worry too much about where we’re going, just follow us. Keep your eyes and ears open for anything strange.”

“Roger that,” you called back.

The three of you rode in silence for the first hour. You didn’t mind it much. Your shoulders were tense as you focused on your surroundings. Your ears were sensitive to the smallest of movements, body twitching at the slightest sounds.

“There she is,” you heard Tommy say up ahead, and your breathing hitched. “Fucking hell, the animals must’ve gotten to her.”

Dot trotted into step beside Tommy’s horse, and with a rolling stomach you looked down and spotted the body.

The dead woman was mangled, gory tears in her flesh clear even through the light smattering of snow that had fallen upon her. Animals had clearly gotten to her through the night, and you cringed to see the blood splattered on the bright white ground around her body. Joel was silent.

The three of you tied your horses to a nearby tree and set off on foot, looking for any signs the raiders might have left behind.

“I’m tellin’ you Tommy, we won’t find anything,” you could hear Joel grumbling under his breath up ahead. “She probably just fucking froze.”

“Let’s just be sure, Joel,” Tommy said firmly.

Joel exhaled heavily, and was turning his head to say something else, when you heard it. it was faint, almost too quiet to notice, but your ears pricked up.

Clicking.

Your feet ground to a halt. “Shut up,” you hissed.

“I beg your par-“ Joel turned to look at you for the first time, but stopped speaking when he saw the alarmed expression on your face.

You held a finger to your lips. Listen, you mouthed. Tommy and Joel shared a brief look, before Tommy gripped your jacket collar and hauled you forward to stand in between them.

“I thought they froze out here in the Winter,” you said quietly, eyebrows furrowed.

“Not all of ‘em,” Joel grunted.

“Alright, we move slowly,” Tommy whispered, eyes darting across their surroundings. “As quiet as possible. There shouldn’t be many, so we’ll sort this fucker out and then get back to the gate.”

“We’re gonna kill it?” you asked, eyes wide. Never in your years in the wild had you actively sought out any infected. When you heard clicking, you went the other way. “We should just head back now.”

“It’s part of the patrol. Gotta clear out any infected we come across,” Tommy told you, eyes apologetic. “You’ll be fine.” You refrained from admitting that it wasn’t you that you were worried about. As much as you and Cal had done your best to avoid them, you’d had to kill plenty of infected in your lives. But you were hit with the sudden realisation that you hadn’t even brought a knife with you. Jesus, I’m out of practice. 

Quietly as possible, you checked that your rifle was loaded, and the three of you walked toward the noise with your weapons raised. Your heartbeat thudded rhythmically in your ears, and the ache of anxiety grew in your chest. The clicking grew louder the further you walked, and your heart stuttered when they finally came into view. Not one, but two.

Your palms were sweaty against the rifle, and you cursed quietly, reaching down to wipe your right hand on the thigh of your pants.

“We’re good,” Joel whispered. You could see him watching you, out of the corner of your eye, but your gaze stayed trained on the duo up ahead. They were close together, twitching and writhing underneath a tall tree a few hundred metres ahead.

The way the creatures transformed with time never ceased to amaze you, in a morbid way. Fungal plates grew out of their heads, hues of bright orange and blue. After a year or so of infection, the fungus had solidified their bodies, making them stronger; more impenetrable. These should be the things that haunted your nightmares.

The three of you crept forward, and the infected were unaware of your presence, until a twig snapped painfully loud under your boot. They let out loud screeches, heads snapping in the direction of the sound.  

You grunted as your right side roughly bumped against Joel’s left, and you realised that you’d both moved to step in front of the other. “Get back,” he barked, staring through the scope on his rifle.

“I got the left,” Tommy shouted, all attempts at stealth thrown out the window. A deafening crack rang out as Tommy shot at one of the clickers. Joel took a shot at the one on the right but growled in frustration when the bullet sizzled just past it. He went to empty the bullet casing and swore when his gun jammed.

You could hear Tommy somewhere to your left, warning you that there was a third infected. Stepping forward, you shot at the one running at you and Joel. The bullet lodged solidly in its torso, but it was too close at that point, and within a second it was on you.

“Fuck,” you yelled, the wind getting knocked from your lungs as you landed on you back.

Your hands pushed at its neck, holding its snapping mouth as far from you as you could. It was snarling and screaming in you face, and white noise rushed in your ears. Its arms flailed, hands swiping viciously towards your face. It landed a heavy blow to the side of your head, and you screamed in pain. A thunderous shot rang out, and a wet sensation splashed across your face. Your head smacked back against the ground as you recoiled, the clicker collapsing above you with its head split open.  

The body was heavy on top of you, and a painful buzzing in your left ear had you grimacing in discomfort. You cupped your ears in attempt to soothe the ache. The weight on top of you finally disappeared, and you took the opportunity to roll onto your side. Warm hands were on your back, your arms, grabbing you.

Joel’s urgent voice finally reached you, calling your name, and you opened your eyes. His knees thudded heavily into the snow beside you, hands gripping the lapels of your jacket and dragging you into a seated position.

You stared at him in a wide-eyed daze. His hands ran over your body frantically, tugging your collar away from your neck to touch your skin, and checking your bare hands. He snapped your name, trying to get your attention. “Are you bit?”

Your face was so wet. As you slowly returned to clarity, it was all you could feel. And in a horrifying moment of realisation, it was all you could taste. The smell of metal and rot had invaded your mouth, your nose. You pushed herself back from Joel just in time to empty the contents of your stomach onto the snow between you.

He gripped your hair at the base of your neck, rubbing your back in short, rough circles. Somewhere far off, you thought you could hear speaking, but it was muffled.

“Is she bit, Joel?” Tommy was saying. Your stomach twisted violently, and you vomited again. When you managed to settle, Joel tugged you up onto your feet, his arm wrapping around your waist.

“Joel?" Tommy urged louder.

“She’s not fucking bit!” Joel yelled, his eyes tight with concern as he wiped the blood off your face with a rag. He walked hastily in the direction of the horses, and when you finally reached them, he tried to get you on his horse with him.

“I can ride,” you mumbled, your own voice sounding muffled.

“Just come wit-“

“I can ride on my own,” you asserted, allowing him to help you mount Dot.

The ride back to the gate was long. Joel rode right next to you, not speaking but never letting you out of his sight. The shock was wearing off, but you felt like you had vertigo; dizziness made you grip the reins tighter, and you prayed internally that you wouldn’t fall off. When the gate finally came into view, you could’ve sobbed from relief.

On Maria’s orders, you weren’t allowed to leave the gate check in point until the settlement’s doctor came and gave the all the clear. Tommy and Maria watched you like a hawk, but you paid them no mind. You were sat on the ground, cradling your aching ear, while Joel made futile attempts to clean up your face. He couldn’t do much though, without warm water. No one said anything. 

“You’ve got a perforated eardrum,” Dr Llewellyn told you, after shining a light into your left ear. It was leaking a clear, blood-tinged fluid that made your skin itch. “I’ll give you some antibiotics to help ward off any infection, but it should heal up on its own within a fortnight or so.”

“Okay,” you nodded slowly, accepting a small bottle of pills. “Thank you.” Considering you were covered in blood and brain matter and dirt, you were surprised by how unfazed Llewellyn appeared.

A low whistle rung out and you turned to look at Tommy. “I’m impressed,” he said quietly. “You held your own out there. We could use someone like you on the patrol team.”

“Tommy,” Joel started, but you interrupted him.

“Can you take me home?” His head swung to look at you and he was nodding quickly, gripping you hand to pull you up off the ground.

He was quiet, on the walk back. It wasn’t out of character, but you could sense a unique solemnity to it. One of his hands was on you at all times, and his head darted around constantly to see if there was anyone on the street who would spot you. Your demeanour would definitely cause alarm, and he wanted to avoid it if possible. The hearing in your left ear was almost entirely muted, and you walked in a daze, wincing at the headache pulsing in your skull.

Cal was still out when you got back, and Joel ushered you into the bathroom. He started the shower and helped you strip out of your ruined clothes. When the water was warm, and you were standing naked in the middle of the room, he turned toward the door.

“Joel,” you whispered, tears brimming on your waterline. As the shock wore off fully, you felt panic flare inside of you again. “Please stay.”

“Of course,” he hushed, putting his hand on your shoulder. His face looked tired, eyes and mouth downturned in concern. “Let’s clean you up, okay darlin’?”

You nodded meekly, allowing him to walk you into the shower and underneath the warm spray. He kicked his shoes and socks off, peeling his clothes off quickly before stepping into the stream of water beside you. Red and brown water ran down your body, and you shut your eyes quickly. You hair was matted thickly to your head, dried blood glueing it to your scalp.

Joel’s hands rubbed water into it, gently working out the tangles until it was clean. When the blood and grime was gone, he shampooed and conditioned it, nudging your head back softly to wash the suds out. You kept your eyes closed, tears still welling in them. The sense of failure and shame bubbled painfully in your chest. Why couldn’t you keep yourself safe? Why did you always get hurt? You felt like a fucking liability.

He pressed a quick kiss to your forehead, signifying that your hair was clean, and began rubbing soap over your body.

“Joel,” you said his name again urgently, voice thick with unshed tears.

“I’m here,” he soothed.

“I need you to check,” you said, voice so low he almost didn’t hear you.

“Check what?” he asked after a moment, his tone steely. Your eyes opened, and a tear rolled down your cheek as you stared at his blank expression. His hands had stopped moving.

“Please, just,” you gulped. “Check for bites. We might’ve missed something.”

 “You’re not fuckin’ bit,” he ground out.

“Please,” you begged, a sob racking through you body. “What if there’s one and we just haven’t seen it? Please.”

“Okay, okay, I’ve got you,” he acquiesced finally, realising that your panic wouldn’t subside until he did this for you.

With painstaking care, he resumed his ministrations along your body. Dragging the bar of soap along your skin, checking for bites on your neck, your back. His fingers traced the length of your arms, down to your fingers. His knees cracked loudly as he crouched beside you, hands brushing down your legs, checking.

When he stood back up, he wrapped his arms around you and tugged you into his chest. “You’re safe,” he murmured in your ear, grip tightening as you cried. “There’s nothing, you’re safe.”

Joel had you wrapped in a blanket and in front of the burning fire in your living room within the hour. He’d rifled through Cal’s room looking for a beanie, and gently tugged the navy hat on your head when he returned.

“He won’t mind I’m sure,” Joel muttered while dropping down onto the ground on your right side. He stared affectionately at how cosy you looked.

“He won’t. We share clothes all the time,” you said softly, gaging his reaction. He nodded slowly, eyes staring into the fire. The moment reminded you so strongly of the night a few weeks prior, when he’d found you wandering Jackson late at night in search of firewood, with a busted face.

“I’m sorry,” he said, the sincerity in his tone surprising you. His gaze held on the flames, but his hand drifted under the blanket to rest on your knee. “I was out of line, and I acted like a jealous kid. I don’t know what came over me.”

You didn’t speak for a moment, mulling his words over in your head. All the anger you’d felt towards him was so foreign now, after your near death experience, but you knew you had to talk about it. The way he’d held you in the shower, cleaned your skin... you weren’t ready be done with him.

“I suppose I’ve been relying on myself for so long,” he continued. “That I gotta … adjust to having other people in the picture. I had to adjust with Ellie, and now with you… I’m adjusting again. And it’s a good change; I want you in the picture.”

“You do?” you asked, wishing he would look at you. His cheeks were red from the warmth of the fire, and he cleared his throat nervously, nodding.

Finally, he turned his head to meet your eye. “I think I’ve wanted you in it since the first time I met you.”

You rolled your eyes, “That’s bullshit, Joel.”

“Okay,” he laughed quietly. “The fourth time I met you, then.”

You stared at each other. For once, you didn’t feel like hiding as his eyes slid over the features of your face, taking you in.

“Cal’s my family,” is all you said.

“And I won’t get in the way of that,” he held your gaze.

“Are you sure?”

He breathed your name. “It terrifies me to admit it but… I want you in any way I can have you. If Cal is your family, then I’m not going to fuck with that. I trust you.”

“He’s happy, you know,” you started, resting your hand on top of his. You chose your words carefully. “That you’re… in my life. He thinks you’re a good person.”

Joel’s eyes softened further, and he had the good grace to appear embarrassed.

“I need to say something though,” you continued, and his face tightened with alertness, hanging on your every word. “After everything that I’ve been through, the way I’ve lived… being in Jackson has brought order back to my life, Joel. And I need that. I need to feel in control of my life, and my decisions. If I want something, like going on a patrol,” his eyes darkened, but he stayed silent. “then I will. And you need to accept that about me. My decisions are my own.”

“They are,” he said firmly, squeezing your knee.

After a beat of silence, you gripped his hand tighter, and admitted, “I want you too. In my picture.”

He nodded, leaning in to rest his forehead against yours. “I know, darlin’.”

“Gonna have to stay on my right side though, with this bum ear,” you sighed.

“We can handle a perforated ear drum,” Joel chuckled quietly, his nose brushing against yours. “You stay on my left, and I’ll stay on your right. We only need two workin’ ears between us."

And as sweet as it was, the moment was broken by the front door of the house unlocking loudly, and Cal stumbled into the room. He took in the picture quickly, watching you both with a distressed look on his face.

“Cal?” you asked, eyes wide. You figured he'd heard what happened on the patrol and rushed home to see you.

“You okay?” Joel stood, taking in the younger man in confusion.

“Sorry,” he breathed heavily, pushing his snow slicked hair back off his forehead. “Sorry to interrupt.”

“Don’t apologise,” Joel said, offering a sheepish smile. Cal watched him warily, and looked to you.

“Someone’s gone missing,” he said, catching you off guard. Your shoulders tensed, and you nodded.

“Milena, right?” you asked. “I heard the other day. I thought she’d just left Jackson.”

“Who?” Cal frowned, his hands shaking. “No, it’s Rebecca, from the patrol group. I just ran into her husband; she didn’t go home last night, and he hasn’t been able to find her today. They’re putting together a search party.”

reading texas sun isn’t enough, i need it injected into my VEINS!!! best piece of writing i’ve read in a long time. it just keeps getting better!!! this is THE joel miller dope you need in your life. SUCH GOOD CHARACTERIZATION I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT FOR POST-OUTBREAK I KNOW YOU’RE GONNA NAIL IT!!! i haven’t been able to properly post reviews about each chapter yet (i’m so sorry but i read it religiously) but i’m planning to reread it and highlight my favorite parts soon because THIS IS LITERATURE, BABY!!! i did not have “obsession over tlou” on my bingo card for the year at this level, but here we are!!!

texas sun - series masterlist (joel miller x f!reader)

series summary: Twenty years later, Joel still doesn’t know how to describe what you were to him. You’d never made any promises to each other, but you loved his daughter like she was your own. Had he known what was going to happen, he wouldn't have let you go.

description: plot inspired partially by this request. pre-outbreak! joel miller x f!reader, slow burn(ish), eventual smut. will end up covering game/tv show events. reader does not have a name, and there's no use of y/n, but she does have a fully fleshed-out backstory, friends/family with names.

warnings (will update as needed): fluff, angst, romance. multiple pov's. time jumps. smut (18+ only, minors DNI), alcohol use, marijuana use, descriptions of absent & abusive parents, eventual canon-typical violence & content. More specific warnings on each chapter.

a/n: super excited about this one, i've had so many ideas for it and it has been a pleasure to write! will try to update roughly every week or so, but i have a full-time job, so it just depends on what i can reasonably accomplish. i don't rush things out before they are ready, so please be patient. :)

fic playlist | writing masterlist | read on a03

chapters: "*" = contains smut

volume i volume ii volume iii volume iv volume v* volume vi* volume vii* volume viii volume ix volume x volume xi volume xii volume xiii

he tried to LIFT HIMSELF UP FOR HER

This is so 🥹💗‼️

Name || Write my name like a poem

Pairing || Jackson!Joel Miller x NB!Reader

Summary || Thanks to your favourite student, you might just find out the one whose heart you've been guarding

Word Count || 3k

Tags/Warnings || Idiots in love, Fluff, Joel is probably a bit OOC, Feelings!, Joel is a pookie, Ellie was adopted by Joel, Acquaintances to Lovers, Flustered Joel, Hinting at Sub!Joel, Age Gap, Insecurities, Unestablished Relationship, Joel struggles with confessions, No Beta We Die Like Men

English is not my first language

If you find any grammar or spelling mistakes, let me know so that I can fix them

Masterlist

Advent Calendar 2024 Masterlist

“Have a good day; and Merry Christmas!” called back at you the children as well as their parents as they left your class. It filled your heart with joy to see them so excited for Christmas. You already got used to it after the past three years you had spent in Jackson. Nonetheless, it still somehow felt unreal.

You saw the world fall, being just a child back then. Despite your young age at the time, you remembered it all. How life had been before the Infected took over. After surviving for years and years on end, dreaming about a dead future of your childhood self, living a somehow normal life in Jackson seemed almost laughable.

These kids, they weren't of how much they had missed simply by being born too late. They would never dream of the world you and the other people from the world before knew. Even though you acknowledged it every single day, you tried. You tried to teach them, showing them the wonders you remembered. You wanted them to see. To let them know there was a future once and that there might be one again, even if slightly different.

Being a school teacher in Jackson made it easier. Otherwise, you would probably be the talk of the town. The lunatic who couldn't stop thinking about the past. Of course you could. Letting go was simply…. hard from time to time.

Teaching on the other hand gave you the space to express yourself. To shift the kids’ minds towards something bigger. Greater than they realised. It was a power which shouldn't be held by one person alone and you knew it. However, you never acted upon it. Those children were the world's future. Your legacy. You couldn't ruin it for selfish wants, no matter how justified they might be.

Because of your kindness, the kids loved you. Adored you. Their favourite teacher? You, without debate. Their English, history and arts teacher. Unlike their other teachers, you were much more understanding. Or maybe you had that parental instinct your colleagues lacked, you weren't sure. Either way, you were their number one.

Honestly, even Ellie liked you a bit more. Ellie. Ellie Miller. Your newest student. She was a bit older but learning never hurt anyone. Especially since they hadn't been taught everything they should. You had to admit, she could be hard to deal with at times. She wasn't stupid or anything, quite the opposite. She was highly intelligent, skilled and competent, too. She was simply her own person. Then again, so was her father.

Her father, Joel, wasn't as familiar to you. Yes, you knew each other and talked when given the chance but had you actually properly hung out with him. You were both busy, mostly seeing each other at parent-teacher meetings. After all, you had students to look after while he gathered supplies for the settlement.

Honestly, when you first met him when he and Ellie arrived a few months ago, you assumed he would be, to put it lightly, an asshole. Surprisingly, he wasn't. He was actually kind of charming. Sweet, caring personality hidden underneath a rugged, reserved persona.

You had seen through it though; on many occasions. The way he talked to Ellie, how he helped out with the kids when you were losing control and he was around. How he knew exactly what to do when it came to the smallest of your pupils. Truth to be told, it made your heart flutter a tiny bit.

You heard enough rumours to know a few pieces of information about him. It was fairly obvious Ellie wasn't his, at least not biologically. You had assumed he took care of children of some of his friends, back in Boston QZ. When rumors of him losing his daughter rolled around, it suddenly made sense. Of course, no-one ever voiced it, but a few people still knew, maybe 10 people at best. Those were the closest to the family anyway and knew they shouldn't spread such things around. You didn't either.

You pitied him but at least he had Ellie now. The girl was truly something and she matched him perfectly. The change from once they had arrived and after those few months of staying in Jackson was palpable. At first slightly detached, they now couldn't handle being gone, away from each other. They were each other's way to heal from the scars and pain of their lives prior to living in Jackson.

As you cleaned your desk, vibrating with excitement at the thought of settling in front of your fireplace with cocoa in your lap, a soft knock came to your door. Turning around to see the newcomer, there stood Ellie. You swore the kid was getting bigger every day. She most likely was; now almost as tall as you. She gave you a smile as she came closer, seemingly beaming.

“Hey, sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to give you something,” she spoke quickly, barely giving you time to greet her back. She opened her backpack, it being filled with all sorts of stuff, before taking out a card. She handed you the blue holiday card, a shrug following her words.

“Sorry if it's wet. Those assholes from lower years thought it would be funny to throw snowballs at me.” she scoffed. You on the other hand shot her a quick look to remind her to mind her language. That is if she even noticed it. Then again, the holidays were officially on and that meant you weren't their teacher anymore. You were simply another anonymous part of the community. If kids had foul language, their parents had to deal with it. You were having a break after all. Maybe the lack of reprimands considering Ellie's language outside of class were why she liked you so much. You were never quite sure.

“Thank you Ellie, it means a lot,” you dipped your head as a thanks, a genuine smile placed upon your face. You weren't lying, it did mean a lot. Even though many kids and their families adored you, there were just a few who actually ever gave you something outside of the end of the school year. It was nice knowing that some of them thought about her during the holidays. It meant a bit more now, since Ellie was the only one who actually gave her something other than wishes of health and joy.

“You're welcome. I gotta go, we're supposed to pick a tree today and Joel's gonna be grouchy if I come late. Merry Christmas!” she said quickly, giving you a small wave. With that, she disappeared out of the door. Once again, you didn't even have time to wish her a merry Christmas. She was so uncatchable at times.

Turning your attention back to the cleaning, you finished as soon as possible. Your mind was all over as you walked home. The town was already feeling festive but you had better plans. Your absence would probably not be noticed anyway. Coming to your lonely home at the edge of the commune, you cleaned up a bit more. Even if you didn't have many festive things around at your disposal, you could at least try to make your home pretty.

Later into the day, the sun slowly nearing the horizon, you finally sat in your armchair by the fireplace. Sipping on your hot cocoa with a marshmallow or two swimming at its surface, you simply relaxed underneath a blanket. You were reading one of the books you had borrowed from the town’s library, it being written by Erich Maria Remarque, as your mind shifted to the card Ellie gave you earlier. Honestly, your eyes only ran over it back then and now you were getting curious.

Putting the things in your hands aside at a nearby coffee table, you move towards your bag. Searching through it for a bit, your hands came into contact with materials, pens, important documents and whatever you actually had in there, some of those things long since forgotten. Finally, your finger flickered against the card. You took it out without any further delay, immediately starting to read.

It was the typical mindless text which had always been on cards such as this. Still, it was the thought that counted. Gaze flickering over the names of Ellie, Joel, Tommy and Maria, your attention was brought back upon Joel's name. That handwriting. You saw it somewhere before. Not on any documents, no, it was familiar from somewhere else. A sudden thought  to you, making you freeze for a second in your spot. Next thing you knew, you were running up the stairs to your bedroom.

You immediately headed for your desk, opening its drawer without hesitation. Searching through its contents, you quickly found the thing you had been looking for amongst the amounts of paper and office supplies. There, in your hands, was a thick envelope, filled to the brim with letters. Taking one of them out, your eyes widened.

For weeks, you had been getting letters. Not threats though. Poems, it almost seemed. Declarations of love and devotion, the sender never signing their name. Now, seeing the letters right next to the holiday card, you were left speechless. It was Joel's handwriting. To be completely honest, the letters sometimes sounded corny enough to be from no-one but him. Still, you appreciated the gesture. Who could say they got love letters in the first place?

“Focus, focus right now,” you told yourself. Shaking your head to at least somehow clear it, you tried to gather your thoughts. Joel Miller. Joel, the guy you had never even hung out with without it being a social event had been sending you love letters for weeks. Would you ever find out if Ellie didn't give you that card? Did she know? Was it on purpose? Was she playing matchmaker? Was it all just a joke? You weren't sure. However, you definitely knew you needed to speak to Joel.

You were ready to go when it suddenly started seeming like a bad idea. Would he start ignoring you? Would he deny it? What if you were wrong and they weren't from him? What if what if… All sorts of thoughts were running through your head as you paced around your living room, flames in the hearth making your shadow dance on the walls. Eventually, you decided what to do. You would wait until the tree in the town's square was lit before making a move.

The weight of your plan was getting more suffocating with every passing minute. The insecurities and uncertainty swirled in your chest like snowflakes in the air, pressing down on you. You shouldn't had slept until 3 PM. Yes, you had less time to stress but it suddenly seemed so near. The dark came quickly and the gathering happened even quicker.

You stood in the back of the crowd, not too far from where Joel along with Ellie and his brother with his wife stood. The lump in your throat wouldn't go away, no matter how many times you swallowed. What was happening to you? You were an adult, a teacher, an apocalypse survivor, and you were still terrified to talk to a guy about some letters that he most likely already knew about? It was almost shameful.

Your eyes didn't stray far even after from him even as the biggest tree in town had been lit, it somehow grounding you with its light. It was a beacon of hope for many in the community and yet, you could only focus on how it made Joel's eyes sparkle. You had noticed it before, his eyes. You refused to acknowledge how easily you could get lost in them. How he selfishly stole every single thought from your head, words from your tongue and breath from your lungs with no more than one look.

For just a second, you let yourself get lost. It had been so long since your mind went silent, simply swimming along your heart's surface. You should had been more careful but as your heartbeat got less and less steady, the soft hum in your ears soothed any worries you had. You didn't even register Joel's eyes meeting yours. Neither did you really pay attention when he completely disappeared from your view, only to appear by your side.

“You okay? You looked as if you were putting a curse on me,” he jested, dark eyes fixed on the tree in front of the two of you. His gaze flickered to you for a second from the corner of his eye, watching your reaction. You had already looked away, joining the other townsfolk in watching the beauty of the tree. Joel's mind was elsewhere however.

Joel wouldn't admit out loud but he somewhat wished you hadn't looked away. He wished to see the way you looked at him when you talked to him. It was the way you looked at most of your friends and yet, it was somehow different. Or maybe, his mind was just making him too hopeful.

“Oh, sorry. I got lost in thought,” your attention flickered to the cup of tea in your gloves-clad hands. You felt Joel's eyes on you, gaze intense as he watched you. You didn't know why he was so fascinated by you at that moment and it made you shift in your spot.

“What, do I have something on my face?” a tilt of your head and you were staring at him again. Why did you look like that? That look in your eyes, how the air made your cheeks and nose rosy, a snowflake on two stuck on your eyelashes. You looked so cozy despite the weather, snuggled up in your warm winter coat.

“No, of course not,” answered Joel, casting his gaze elsewhere. He prayed the cold was enough to make you believe he was redder from that and not you. After all, he was capable of unwitnessed violence but you were the line of what he could handle? Even he had a hard time believing it.

“Alright then,” you hummed before blowing onto your drink. Taking a small sip, the two of you settled into a comfortable silence. Everyone else around you was unaware of the tension brewing between you. To them, it came across as two acquaintances sharing a quiet moment.

“Thank you for the card,” you mumbled suddenly, catching him off guard, “I appreciate it.”

The smile you sent him mirrored in his own expression as he recalled the holiday card Ellie forced him to sign the morning before. He hadn't been aware it was for you but, seeing your smile, he didn't consider anyone a better receiver than you.

“Don't mention it. Besides, it was Ellie's idea,” Joel shrugged, pulling his jacket a bit more over himself to get warmer. Everything else was freezing compared to the heat in his face. The need to escape, to swim up and get out of the ocean of unsaid emotions you posed was a bit too much. And yet, he would drown if you asked him to.

A smile tugged on your lips, a tiny flickered of amusement flickering through your expression. Glancing down to his jaw, you watched the way he thickly swallowed. Were you making him uncomfortable? Maybe he knew about the topic you needed to discuss. Taking a shaky breath, you took in your shoes, covered in a white blanket.

“The letters weren't written by Ellie though, were they?” the sound of your voice, your words, they made Joel tense up. The man stood there like an icicle, mind slowly processing what you just told him. You knew. He had hoped you wouldn't find out, not until he was ready to come forward himself. What coward hid behind unsigned letters? Joel Miller, apparently.

“No, they weren't,” shaking his head, he once again surveyed your face, searching for at least something to catch on to assess your opinion. For the first time since he started talking to you, your eyes met. His brown ones stared into yours while a lump formed in his throat. You gave him a look you hadn't given anyone else and it was reserved for him and him only. He was hooked.

“Should I... stop? Sending them, I mean,” the sound of his voice made you chuckle. He seemed embarrassed, desperate to assess your mood. It made you smile to know how easily such a ruthless man could get flustered. The uncertainty was basically flowing out of him. With a smile, you shook your head.

“No, it's okay. I actually kinda like it,” at your words, Joel's expression softened to the point where he reminded you of a puppy. Those huge brown orbs, staring at you as if you were an otherworldly being. He nodded, immediately listening to your words. He would send as many letters as you wished if that's what it took.

“Can I get you a coffee?” he blurted out without hesitation. A sudden fear penetrated his mind; what if he was too rash? Was he trying too hard? He was worried, quite a lot. Joel wanted anything but to blow it. However, a tiny voice inside told him you would accept. And, indeed, you gave him a nod, your smile somehow even widening.

“Sure, I'd like that,” you nodded, a warm feeling running through you. You weren't of that but you both felt butterflies fluttering inside you. How could they not? You liked him and Joel, well, Joel voiced his thoughts in his letters. He let out a sigh of relief, a lopsided grin spreading on his face. For just a moment, he let himself enjoy the feeling of your acceptance. Composing himself once more, Joel cleared his throat.

“Alright. I'll uh, pick you up tomorrow at 8?” a call from Tommy slightly interrupted the moment of vulnerability between the two of you, but Joel didn't seem to even notice. He glanced Tommy's way but his attention remained on you nonetheless. His mind was filled with you for the time being, the only person he truly cared about outside of his little family.

You managed to agree to his proposal before he was pulled away from you by Ellie, the girl forcing him to come along with her back to their original spot. Waving him goodbye, your smile still lingering. Maybe those holidays wouldn't be so lonely after all?

Name || Advent Calendar 2024 - Day 1 - Frost

Pairing || Post-Outbreak!Joel Miller x F!Reader

Summary || As winter rolls around, it brings freezing weather in which Joel finds a way to warm you up

Word Count || 2.8k

Tags/Warnings || 18+, MDNI, Explicit Language, Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff Hypothermia mentioned, P in V, Fingering, Unsafe Sex, Outdoor Sex, Established Relationship, Daddy Kink, No Use of Y/N, Age Difference, Size Kink, Creampie, No Beta We Die Like Men, Ellie doesn't exist, Joel is probably a bit OOC

English is not my first language

If you find any grammar or spelling mistakes, let me know so I can fix them

Masterlist

Advent Calendar 2024 Masterlist

The weather was getting colder and colder every single day. Warmer autumn days gave space to harsh winter storms, the nights getting darker. With darkness also came freeze. It was much easier to get sick nowadays and with the lack of medication at their disposal, how can you stay at peace?

On many occasions, you got sick. Both Joel and you, his travelling partner. Lucky for the two of you, it was mostly just a runny nose, sometimes even cough. Still, the thought lingered. What if one of you got severely sick? Hurt? Lost and hurt? There were so many things to worry about.

Joel was getting paranoid once November rolled around. For a good reason, too. After being raided not too long ago, you were left with barely anything to get by with. Food? You could hunt something down. Clothes? The ones you had had to suffice. Medicine? None. Weapons? Two guns and a knife would have to do. It was much harder to survive out there in winter after all, much less find supplies.

Not to mention the Infected. With 20 meters of snow underneath your feet, how could you possibly escape hordes of fungi-covered monsters when you were struggling even without them? They could hear much better as well. Cold air would make each snap of a twig travel so much further than it had when you escaped Boston QZ.

It scared you both. Scared him. Joel was afraid to lose you. He wouldn't handle it after so much death following him around. Especially since it was just a few months since Tess’s death. Even though he wouldn't say it out loud, her sacrifice hurt him more than he'd care to admit. She had been his friend, partner, friend, how could he just forget?

Well, he had you and he wouldn't give that up. He grumbled and complained at first but, now, after so much time, he couldn't find himself to say goodbye. He probably wouldn't do so even once you finally got to Tommy. You were too precious to him.

Another thing was the slowly blooming relationship between the two of you. You were both so used to being alone that just a sliver of attention got you hooked. He lost too many people and the thought of having someone by his side? A flickering wish, now burning bright thanks to your presence.

And you, you who grew up as a future FEDRA soldier. Being all alone in this world, knowing nothing but the cold walls of the school and training, it felt like a miracle to be free, with someone that cared without wanting nothing in return.

You worried too. Winter was quickly approaching and so was the cold. From how quickly nature started changing, you could already tell the coldest time of the year wouldn't go easy on you. It got even worse than you predicted though.

At first, it was just a bit cold. Then came the freezing. Snow was coming much sooner than expected and you were running out of the time to get supplies. You didn't have enough to go through the winter. Your sleeping bags were barely fit for such weather and so were the other clothes.

Joel searched through stores, homes now long abandoned and even vehicles for at least a piece of clothing that would keep you warm. He would like to stay warm as well but he would handle the cold if it meant you were safe and sound. However, it was as if the entire world had burned all winter clothes before the spread of the infection.

Having nothing to warm yourselves with other than the fire, Joel refused to let you be on your own at night. Every time the two of you went to sleep, he would lay down as close as possible, arms wrapped around each other. For body warmth, he'd say. Still, you sometimes felt his length poke your lower back; even if neither of you mentioned it.

In the middle of December, the cold got too much to bear. Even snuggling up to each other at night didn't help most of the time. It bothered Joel. Especially since he started noticing the signs of sickness in you. The lack of warmth and food and excess of stress weren't doing either of you any good. Especially you. You had always been more sensitive to the weather changes and he knew it.

On one of the harsher nights, as the two of you spent the night hidden in a cave somewhere far from civilization, he watched you with keen eyes. It worried him, your state. You were exhausted, stressed, hungry. Your eyes simply watched as he prepared dinner above a fire, barely blinking in fear the meat would disappear.

“You should rest,” Joel mumbled suddenly, eyeing your expression. His deep voice almost made you fall asleep right then but you knew he wouldn't want that. At least without eating dinner first. Even though he wanted you to rest, he didn't dare leave you unconscious without having his arms wrapped around you. It was too much of a risk in his opinion.

He wondered about either of you getting hypothermia too many times and immediately shrugged it off each one. How would he even handle that? Losing you to something like that? Considering their predicament, you both knew you wouldn't be able to save the other one in case something happened. It was mostly why you had been so careful up until then.

“I'm not tired,” you whispered back with a shrug, shifting in your spot a bit to get at least a tiny bit of warmth in. Your eyes closely followed Joel's much bigger hands as they poured the soup-like substance into a bowl before handing it to you. With a muttered ‘Thanks’, you dug into the food without hesitation.

“I'm just cold. But I suppose you already knew that,” you breathed out, the words leaving your trembling lips as a breath vapor. Joel watched as the steam travelled further up before becoming one and the same with the air, its temperatures dropping significantly in a matter of seconds.

With a silent nod, Joel settled for simply watching as you ate, his own dinner sitting abandoned in his lap. He couldn't care less about eating at the moment. Of course, he appreciated all the food you had at your disposal but on that particular night, his mind was elsewhere.

Despite struggling to survive, he couldn't help but think about how nice you looked, all cuddled up in your warmest clothes, your sleeping bag pooling in your lap. Of course you were cold despite having so many things to keep you warm, it was probably the most freezing night yet since winter started. But he didn't voice his thoughts. They would be practically pointless at the moment.

The silence stretched on even as you finished eating. The flame of the fire continued to burn, warming up the bare minimum of its surroundings. From what you felt, it wasn't practically there. Just like Joel's warmth pressing against your back underneath your sleeping bags, it seemed nonexistent compared to the frost coming from outside your hideout.

“Still cold?” whispered Joel, his breath hitting the nape of your neck like ember. It sent shivers down your spine, goosebumps spreading over your body in the way the Cordyceps spread underneath the world's surface.

You hummed in agreement, a soft exhale escaping through your nose before inhaling once more. The action made you huff, the icy air violently pinching your nose from the inside. Taking a deep breath, your lips quickly turned stiff, lacking warmth. You felt Joel grumble underneath his breath, his chest pressing further against your back. It didn't help much but it was something.

For what seemed like eternity in the eternal night filled with thousands of lights, you laid next to each other, trying your best to rest. It was proving more and more futile with every passing second.

Just then, a touch against your covered lower abdomen. It was so subtle, so gentle you barely noticed it. Next came a press against your clothes, the warm hand slipping downwards. Your breath hitched, hot air on your lips a stark contrast to your surroundings.

“This might help,” Joel's voice vibrated in your ear, warming it up for just a second. You heard as he thickly swallowed, almost embarrassed to be doing such things to you in the dead of the night. The unsure words spilled from his lips, almost afraid to voice them, “If you want to, of course.”

He let out a breath of relief at your quiet nod, the shame falling off of his mind now that you agreed to his proposal. His thick fingers slipped underneath the waistband of your ice cold jeans, settling down on top of your mound. He could feel the heat surrounding your body, much more faint than it usually was.

You breath hitched, entire body stilling as his fingers dug beneath your panties, gently caressing the pubic hair on top before running down, towards your entrance. You shivered in his grasp, too sensitive to his advances after such a long time without relieving all the stress from your body. Although he didn't properly touch you yet, you were already quivering.

You had missed his touch. It had been so long since he did so. It was too dangerous, too risky; and he refused to risk your health and wellbeing just to get laid. He had his priorities straight.

Your breath shook, a silent gasp on your lips, as his fingers dipped inside you. The familiar stretch felt delicious. So familiar yet still able to take your breath away. Especially once he hit that special mushy spot inside you. It made your head spin, stars dancing in front of your eyes from how good it felt.

You heard his heavy breathing right next to your ear as his fingers worked to bring you to climax. His hips softly rutted against your backside, desperate for some action as well. Joel was patient though.

Besides, he enjoyed preparing you. Seeing the delight in your expression, your entire body melting thanks to nothing but his hands and tongue. There was something utterly captivating about it; about knowing how easily he made you give yourself over to him and only him. He loved knowing you were completely his and only his.

“Ya like that sweetheart? You like how my fingers feel?” Joel hummed into your ear, a smirk grazing his lips as you nodded. You let out a moan, eyes closing blissfully, once his lips connected with the back of your neck. His teeth dug into the soft flesh, sucking the flesh in as he shifted in his spot. A part of his body pressed you against the ground, it being a comfortable weight against you.

“Y-Yes daddy,” you whispered, eyes falling shut as you arched your back. Squirming underneath him to get his fingers to that one spot which made you see stars, you whined. The knot in your stomach was getting tighter, almost painfully so.

Your actions and words made him chuckle, the sound vibrating from deep within his chest. In his opinion, you were adorable like that. So needy and desperate for him, a complete mess underneath him. He would love to keep going, to tease you and edge you until you were a soaking mess, begging for him to bring you to your high. However, Joel was pent up just as much as you were.

You whined as soon as his fingers left your tight wet heat, slipping out with a squelch. You were about to sit up to look at him, a bit too ready to beg for his attention. Before you could however, his hands pinned you down against the bottom of your sleeping bag. You felt his weight press against your back, his thighs on both of your sides. A bit of shuffling and his pants were pooling at his hips, just like yours.

You didn't have time to react before the head of his cock pressed against your entrance, nudging against it to get in and hide in your tight hole. It slipped into you quite easily, you leaking more than you had in a long time.

The penetration took air away from your lungs. His cock felt much bigger on the inside than it seemed on the outside after all. For a second, it was too much to bear. Even after so many times you had felt him inside, you needed a moment to adjust which he'd gladly give you.

“Fuuuuck…” he breathed out, head falling back. He loved the way you gripped him, milking him before he even started moving. The squeeze on his cock felt heavenly, your walls fluttering around his hardness in a way that made his cock twitch and breath hitch.

How you could feel this nice, he wasn't sure. It was as if you had been made for no-one but him, your body and soul intertwining with his own. It was at those moments of vulnerability, when he was deep inside, holding onto each other, eyes connected, that he felt closest to you. It was then that nothing else mattered. Nothing but you.

He bottomed out into you with one swift movement, settling in comfortably. He didn't move until you gave him a sign, allowing him to proceed. When he did, both of you let out a sigh of relief. You both needed that. Wanting to be even closer, he laid down on top of you, keeping some of his weight off of your body. His own body pressed you down, his chin resting on top of your head, his hips still pistoning in and out of you.

You moaned and quivered underneath his weight as he whispered praise into your ear. He told you everything he knew you liked to hear. How good of a girl you were. How nice you felt. How you were taking him like a champ, better than anyone he had had. How much he loved you.

He did. He did love you. More than anyone. Even though he didn't admit it nor mention it too much, it was true. More than you could possibly imagine. During those little moments of unfiltered passion, those were the ones when he told you over and over. It was almost as if you'd leave him forever if he didn't.

That thought had always lingered in the back of his mind. Would you leave him? You had every right to. He wouldn't even blame you. He was too old for you. Too rough, too broken by the world. He had seen too much to ever heal.

You on the other hand? You were an angel walking amongst mere mortals such as him. A perfect doll, unaware of the pain and suffering of the world. Of course, he knew you were of it but compared to him, you were innocent. A bit too innocent for such a life. And despite everything, you stayed kind and selfless. He didn't deserve you. He knew it.

However, looking down at you, he knew the truth. He wouldn't let you go. Not without a fight. You were his and no-one else's. He'd do everything he could to make you happy. To see your smile and the light in your eyes when you looked at him during dawn.

The connection between you was overwhelming, threatening to swallow you whole. Hands intertwined, you turned your head to meet his gaze. There was no crushing lust which made you jump into his lap. There was simply pure, unadulterated adoration and love that promised nothing but eternal devotion. Joel looked at you like you had hung the moon and stars themselves.

With a groan and a sigh, you both reached your peak, his seed coating your insides. You collapsed onto your sleeping bag, flushed and panting, as his softening cock slipped out of you. You barely registered what was happening even though you felt it so clearly. Joel gently cleaned you both up before fixing up the clothes around your body. Pulling you into his arms, his face hid in your hair.

“I love you,” Joel whispered, his breath hot against you. It warmed you, definitely more than before. He had been right, it actually helped. The body warmth you shared was more prominent, making the cold not as unbearable.

“Love you too,” you retorted, a tired smile on your lips. You were tired, sleep coming to you easier than it had in a few days. Yawning, your eyes fluttered closed. Joel's arms tightened around you, a heated blanket upon you. It lulled you into sleep after than either of you expected and, for once, you could actually ignore the frost surrounding you.

Requests are currently:

OPEN FOR THE HBO SERIES ONLY

Even though I might write for some characters more than others, the other characters are still available as well!

Do not be afraid to request anyone from the current open form of media of the Fandom!

Works

COMING SOON

Disclaimer:

I do not own The Last Of Us or any of its characters. The Last Of Us is the property of Naughty Dog and Sony Interactive Entertainment. This fanfiction is written purely for entertainment purposes and is not intended for profit. Please support the original work!

Hi!

Welcome to

hicanivent's Masterlist

Please do not interact if you're a minor; my works are strictly 18+ only (with exceptions).

Won't write:

Scat

Character x OC

Real People

Self inserts

Might consider writing:

Vomit, Piss kink

Character x Character

Female Characters

Crossover

I am willing to write anything else.

Please, keep in mind!

If I find any new situations, scenarios or requests I am not comfortable with, I will add them into the 'Won't write' category.

Situations, scenarios or any requests mentioned in the 'Might consider writing' category depend on requested fanfiction and theme of the chosen character and/or fandom.

I might consider writing certain female characters. However, it is not a definite decision. Personally, I feel more comfortable writing for male characters but I'm always willing to try!

Extra warning

Some of my works might include triggering themes such as non-con, dub-con, abuse, manipulation, suicide, self harm and other themes, depending on the work.

Only fandoms which have such themes in canon might include mentions of incest, pedophilia, necrophilia. Such themes will NEVER be fully explicit and will only be there for educational or character lore purposes.

I do not agree with incest, necrophilia nor pedophilia. If you are attracted to any of those outside of fiction, please find medical help.

Fandoms I write for + Requests:

Request anything! Be it headcannons, one shots, multiple chapter stories, songfics, crackfics, anything!

(Open) - Open for any requests

(Request Will Be Considered) - Might have to learn more about Character's/Fandom's lore

If a request gets denied, it's going to be postponed until the Fandom and/or Character is open again

(Only Certain Characters) - Completely knowledge of only certain characters

(Only Certain Movies) - Other movies/series not seen for now

(Currently Closed) - Won't be written because of: Lack of knowledge; Not seen for a long time; Details Blurry; Series/Franchises not finished

Gravity Falls (Only Certain Characters)

Harry Potter (Only Certain Characters)

Fantastic Beasts (Currently closed)

Hogwarts Legacy (Hogwarts Legacy)

Stranger Things (Currently Closed)

Hazbin Hotel (Currently Closed)

Helluva Boss (Only Certain Characters)

Pirates of the Caribbean (Currently Closed)

The Lord of The Rings (Currently Closed)

The Hobbit (Only Certain Characters)

The Rings of Power (Currently Closed)

Five Nights at Freddy's (Currently Closed)

Game of Thrones (Only Certain Characters)

House of the Dragon (Only Certain Characters)

Hunger Games (Currently Closed)

The Maze Runner (Currently Closed)

Rick and Morty (Currently Closed)

Cuphead (Currently Closed)

The Chronicles of Narnia (Currently Closed)

BBC Sherlock (Currently Closed)

DC (Opened For The Penguin series, Harley Quinn series and The Dark Knight Only)

Marvel (Opened For X-Men Movies and Series and Deadpool Trilogy Only)

La Casa De Papel (Currently Closed)

Avatar: The Last Airbender (Currently Closed)

Bendy and the Ink Machine (Currently Closed)

Peaky Blinders (Currently Closed)

The Last Of Us (Open For The HBO Series Only)

The Boys (Open)

Good Omens (Currently Closed)

Welcome Home ARG (Currently Closed)

Fallout (Currently Closed)

Star Wars (Currently Closed)

The Walking Dead (Currently Closed)

The Mandela Catalogue (Currently Closed)

The Slasherverse (Only Certain Characters/Movies)

Dead by Daylight (Currently Closed)

Sonic the Hedgehog (Open For Sonic Movies, Sonic Prime and Sonic Boom Only and Only Certain Characters)

Detroit: Become Human (Request Will Be Considered)

Kingsman (Open)

Tim Burton Movies (Open)

Narcos (Currently Closed)

Squid Game (Open)

Random Movies (Request Will Be Considered)

Any movie with [x] (Only Certain Movies)

Specials

Advent Calendar 2024 Masterlist

Bouquets of Pedro Creativity Challenge

Please, remember!

I am about to graduate, have obligations and my life as well! Besides that, I am not in a stable mental state sometimes. These things might cause delays in delivering requests.

Please, be patient! Your requests will be written and sent out, no matter how long it might take!

Lastly, English is not my first language. Even though I consider myself good at it, I can make mistakes as well. Please tell me if you find any grammar or any other kind of mistake so I can fix them up as soon as possible!

mush's rules!

𓍊𓋼 rules about my page (under the cut)!

overall rules and boundaries

⟢ mdni! currently, this account is sfw (as i am yet to write anything), but, seeing as i am unsure whether or not i want to delve into writing anything nsfw, i feel that it'd be best to just make the page strictly 18+ lol. better safe than sorry amirite (ᵕ•_•)

⟢ i won't be monitoring the page super strictly (because, who has time for that?), but if i do happen to find that you are <18, you will be blocked.

⟢ you are responsible for the media you consume (not i), and while these rules are set in place, ultimately, i cannot control your media consumption, so read at your own risk.

⟢ under no circumstances may my work be posted, translated, or published elsewhere, and especially not used in anything to do with ai.

⟢ if you want to request something specific, but isn't stated in my will/won't section, then don't be afraid to ask! if it doesn't fall within my boundaries, i'll try and write something similar or just politely decline, however, if it does, then i'll be sure to write it! i'm always looking for asks, especially seeing as i'm new to writing here on tumblr, so please don't be shy!!

⟢ lastly, if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all and please refrain from even interacting here. i want this account to be a safe space for people and so bigots will be blocked.

what i will write for (eventually)

⟢ games + characters: red dead redemption II (character(s) include; arthur morgan), the last of us (character(s) include; joel miller), resident evil (character(s) include; leon kennedy), call of duty (character(s) include; captain john price, simon "ghost" riley), baldur's gate 3 (character(s) include; astarion ancunín), silent hill 2 (character(s) include; james sunderland)

⟢ themes: smut, fluff, female!reader, angst, d/s dynamics, daddy kink, praise, degradation (nothing heavy), scent kink, breeding kink, omegaverse, pet play,

what i won't write for

⟢ themes: underage, non-con, scat/piss kink, male!reader, major character death, exhibitionism, voyeurism,

*please note that i am very new to tumblr, and to sharing my writing, so while it might not be the best, just know that i am learning as i go and via exposure therapy! ˙ᵕ˙

mush's ultimate fic rec guide!

𓍊𓋼 a masterlist of all my favourite works made by various creators here on tumblr. most of these are series', but i've categorised them by 'series' and 'oneshots' just incase. i've made sure to tag them, link the posts, and add a brief summary for each, so y'all can digest and enjoy too! i'll also be updating this regularly (*ᵕᴗᵕ)⁾⁾

𓍊𓋼 please read through all of the tags listed for each fic carefully as i am not going to be listing them here! you control the media you consume.

𓍊𓋼 updated: 26/04/25 🔔

𓍊𓋼 key: ✩ = ongoing / ✮ = completed

Red Dead Redemption II

⟢ coming soon!!

⟢

Baldur's Gate 3

⟢ coming soon!!

⟢

The Last of Us

series

⟢ 'daddy next door' by @cavillscurls (dom! joel miller x sub! fem! reader) ✩

summary: "its summer in texas, and when the dashing joel miller moves in next door, your less than favorable life gets completely turned around."

⟢ 'of rage and ruin' by @corazondebeskar-reads (werewolf! joel miller x omega! fem! reader) ✩

summary: "joel miller made it twelve years into the apocalypse without getting bit. he turns into a much different kind of monster than he expected, though."

⟢ 'Waiting Game' by @gutsby (dbf! joel miller x fem! reader) ✩

summary: "joel miller has mastered the art of self-control in all areas except one: not fucking his friend’s daughter. a cross-country road trip home from college takes a hard turn when he’s forced to share a motel room with you."

Resident Evil

⟢ coming soon!!

⟢

Call of Duty

series

⟢ 'Cherry Red, Crimson Blood' by @soaps-mohawk (tf141 x omega! fem! reader) ✩

summary: "task force 141 operates successfully without an omega, at least that’s what price has been saying since its formation. two alphas and two betas balance the pack just fine, and they have the numbers to prove it. it works for a while, until the omega initiative is born and the 141 find themselves having to adjust to the sudden addition of an omega to their pack. fresh out of an institute, you’re hardly fit for their secretive, dangerous world, or so price thinks."

⟢ '𝚂𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝙳𝚘𝚐 𝙹𝚘𝚑𝚗𝚗𝚢' by @void-my-warranty (simon riley x fem! reader x johnny mactavish) ✩

summary: you and simon have been together for years, but, unable to give you what you truly want in the bedroom, what you need, he decides to bring in the only other man he trusts to do the job -- johhny. as feelings grow and troubles arise, will this arrangement come to a crumbling head, or will there be an alternative solution?

⟢ 'AS NEEDED' by @novemberheart (tf141 x omega! fem! reader) ✩

summary: after having previously been rejected by task force 141, their decision to finally accept an omega into their pack comes with many troubles and uncertainty, and your new place here might not be as permanent as you think.

⟢ 'Jaws' by @alkalineapparition (simon riley x hybrid! fem! reader) (this one is on ao3) ✩

summary: "alone and half feral in a dirty cell, ghost finds you during a raid beneath a military research lab. it quickly becomes clear that something isn't right with you, your behaviour more beast than human. a result of horrific human experiments, you're a failed attempt at making genetically modified soldiers with killer instincts and keen senses. instead they produced you - a mutt. ghost is assigned to be your handler, to help you heal and shape you in to the 141's very own attack dog. but the bond between a handler and their beast eventually turns into something more..."

⟢ 'In Limbo' by @ilium-ilia (mafia! simon riley x fem! reader) ✩

summary: "joining the mafia is no different than selling a soul to the devil, and it's something simon riley is all too willing to do if it means keeping his family safe. it isn't until he meets you–the girl who runs from everything–that he realises there are much worse things to be caught up in."

⟢ 'Daughters with Soft Underbellies' by @ilium-ilia (outlaw! john price x fem! reader) ✩

summary: "all your life you have known nothing but the word of god and your father's short temper. every day, you are forced to turn the other cheek for minor mistakes you make within your father's gaze. yet, as a devout follower to god and your father, you have no one else to turn to. when the owner of the saloon tells you about some strangers lurking around town, you decide to take your chances with these wayward men in the hopes that they'll save you. but they are dangerous, conniving bandits; a fact you learn a little too late. you should have known that sheep who stray too far from the flock are at the mercy of the wolves. better sharpen those teeth of yours, little lamb."

⟢ 'anatomy of us' by @bi-writes (alpha! simon riley x omega! fem! reader) ✩

summary: "in an attempt to tame an unruly alpha, you are given. he did not come with warning labels. but neither did you."

⟢ 'Breaking Bread' by @softaestluv (simon riley x fem! reader) ✮

summary: "simon riley who is quite the anomaly of a man, or human, rather. your lieutenant who has only spoken a handful of words to you. simon riley who happens to be sat at the only open table in the mess hall."

⟢ 'Grease & Grime Won’t Break Your Bones' by @softaestluv (mechanic! simon riley x fem! reader) ✮

summary: "you never thought you were attracted to grease and grime, sweat and exhaustion, definitely needed a shower and scrub, but no one has worn it like he is."

⟢ (1) 'RETURN TO SENDER' (original) / (2) 'IN CONTEMPT' (sequel) by @sai-int (criminal! simon riley x fem! reader) ✮

summary: (1) "it was a joke. A letter to a criminal—uk's most wanted. you told him he was hot. told him you were a virgin. left your address, because it’s not like he’d ever get out, right?" | (2) "you tried to move on, but no one quite measures up; not to the way he touched you, not to the way he ruined you. but when he reappears, you can feel him even before you see him. the past has a way of punishing disobedience, and now, it’s here to settle the score."

⟢ 'RASPBERRY GIRL' by @peachesofteal (dom! simon riley x sub! fem! reader) ✩

summary: captain! simon riley takes an interest in the sweet and docile little bakery-worker and vows to make her wholly his.

⟢ '𝐋𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤' by @cinnamonghostcrunch (simon riley x fem! reader) ✩

summary: "where in you move to manchester to start fresh, only to cross paths with a mysterious local who changes everything. what started as an unexpected encounter soon evolves into something much more, growing increasingly complicated as his secrets and your doubts cast shadows over everything."

⟢ 'INK & NEEDLE' by @gloomwitchwrites (tattoo artist! simon riley x fem! reader) ✮

summary: "a night out in london to celebrate your friend’s upcoming marriage ends with a quick hook-up in a club’s green room. you don’t expect to see your masked man ever again, and you leave it as a one-time thing. three years later, you’re back in england, and find yourself facing the man you walked away from at that club. he's running a tattoo parlor just down the street from where you’re staying. over time, your paths cross and cross again until the two of you are tangled up in a messy web. will it last? or will one of you walk away?"

⟢ 'Martyr in the Making' by @eilidh-eternal (tattoo artist! simon riley x fem! reader) ✩

summary: he's an observer. notices the way you use getting tattoos as a thinly-veiled coping mechanism. he has a better way for you to cope though, things he can teach you that don’t involve needles, but would still leave his mark on your skin.

*major credit to all the creators mentioned, and to the ones i'm yet to discover! you guys are so talented and i love you ( ๑ ˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و♡

Chapter II - Grief; The Latest Trend

SUMMARY: Angelica is trying to grieve her late girlfriend but is interrupted by yet another patrol. After a bit she considers the interruption to have been a good thing, it gave her time to bond with Ellie while partaking in some ‘extra-curriculars’. Before they can partake in anymore Jesse and Dina show up in a slight panic. Joel and Tommy weren’t at the look out? Once they split up it doesn’t take long for them to figure out why.

Angelica's POV

I’d done decently well adjusting to life in Jackson. The only thing that really stressed me out was the infected we encountered on patrols. You’d think I’d be used to seeing them by now but it seemed like everytime they irked me more. Aside from the few infected, patrols were peaceful. I did a lot of them with Ellie, I liked her company. Ellie was easy to talk to after I realized she’s a total nerd. She’s simple, she likes dinosaurs and those savage starlight comics. She also shared her weed with me whenever we took breaks so that was a plus.

Speaking of Ellie and weed it’d be kinda nice right now. Instead I’ve been sitting on my bathroom floor for the past..two hours? I think. I really needed to get up. I needed to stop thinking about Julia, get ready for patrol and all that. Right, patrol. Patrol with Ellie just what I was hoping for.

I pulled myself up and quickly washed my face. Thankfully my eyes weren’t red and puffy like they had been yesterday. I changed quickly, checked my ammo, and grabbed my pack before heading out the door. Jesse was the only one at the gates when I got there, he seemed tired.

“Long night?” I asked as Cassie(the horse) came to a stop.

He nods “Looong night, you missed a lot last night”

“You and Dina get back together early?” I joke.

“Nah we’re done for good this time” He confirms, it was bound to happen soon.

Before I can speak again Dina and Ellie trot up behind us. Jesse explains that Ellie and I will be taking the creek trail while he takes the new one with Dina (something like that I forget how this went in game). Once he’s done we head off on our separate ways.

The first few minutes are quiet as we make our way to the first checkpoint. It’s a comfortable silence, nothing felt wrong. Eventually Ellie broke the silence, she can never stay quiet for long.

“Wanna tell me what’s going on?” She asks, slowing to ride beside me.

“Huh?” I ask, looking over at her.

“You’re uh..I don’t know you just seem off” She mumbles.

I blink at her for a moment “Uh, it’s nothing El, I’m alright”

“Angel if you were alright you would’ve been at the Tipsy Bison last night”

She was right, it was unlike me to miss events. She knew me just well enough for it to be frustrating.

“It’s nothing big” I mutter “C’mon we’re almost there”

I hear Ellie sigh beside me but she doesn’t press. We check in a move onto the next point, not wanting to waste time. We don’t make much progress before the snow gets worse. We head into an old library and stock up on anything we can find. Ellie ends up finding a closed off area and holy shit there was a lot of weed there.

We find some pre-rolled joints and some matches then decide to get comfortable. I sit on the couch and she leans against me. There’s nothing but small talk as we pass the joint back and forth. After it burns down to a bud Ellie puts it out. We relax against each other, basking in the euphoric feeling. Until Ellie opens her mouth again.

“So..ready to talk” she asks, looking up at me.

“Hm..this week has just got me a little fucked up” I mutter. I can feel her looking at me expectantly so I continue. “Few days ago was Julia’s birthday, yesterday would’ve been our two years”

“Julia?” she murmurs as if she’s trying to remember.

“My girlfriend..well she was, till the fuckin infected got her” I murmur the last bit.

”Oh shit” she mutters.

Ellie’s quiet for a moment, I’d assume she doesn’t know what to say.

“I’m uh..I’m sorry about that Angel” she says quietly, adjusting against me.

“s’alright, I’ve been better today, yesterday was uh..not my best day”

“Yeah, guess it wasn’t a good day for anybody huh” she jokes but I can tell she had a rough time too.

“Oh? Is this what Jesse meant when he said I ‘missed a lot’ last night?” I ask, finally opening my eyes to look at her.

“Mhmm, it was..” she trails off and sighs “I kissed Dina, then got in a fight with Joel” she sighs.

“Are those two things related?” I ask.

She nods “After I kissed Dina, Seth opened his big mouth and Joel pushed him”

“So..Seth was being a bigot and Joel defended you and you got in a fight with him” I summarize the situation and she nods. “Why’d you get in a fight with Joel for defending you”

She huffs “I don’t know I just..I was angry” I could see her getting frustrated, she’d probably already gotten a lecture from Maria or somebody else about this.

“Hey..I’m not gonna lecture you, I just wanted to try and understand better” I speak gently.

She nods and relaxes into me, it was nice seeing her so calm. We didn’t get to relax much longer because Jesse and Dina came hurdling downstairs.

“What are the two of y- is that weed?!” Jesse asks as we both try to hurry off the couch.

“There was a snow storm outside, we thought we’d kill some time” Ellie explains, “and why aren’t you at the look out” she asks, grabbing her pack.”

“Cause Tommy and Joel never showed up” Jesse snaps.

The room goes quiet for a moment.

“We need to split up and look for them” Dina announces.

We all head back upstairs and head off on our horses. I end up finding Jesse after a short while and we stick together. He said it’d be best to find the others while we’re at it.

“Jesse, their horses are over here” I call out to him.

He ties up our horses next to theirs and we head towards the nearby house. We hurried inside and heard Dina yelling from downstairs. Jesse insisted on going in front of me as we made our way to her. He stopped art the bottom of the stairs and I could just see Dina holding Ellie who had * on her face. Jesse slowly made his way over to them. When I step fully into the room I see Joel, or what used to be Joel. His face was..mutilated..* was everywhere.

Ellie was crying into Dina’s arms, Jesse was trying to check on Tommy. I stood frozen, my gaze went from Joel to Ellie to Tommy again and again. After a moment I heard Jesse calling my name. I helped him tend to Joel’s corpse and tried to block out Ellie’s cries. I couldn’t bear listening to her, not when she was like this.

By the time we’d wrapped his body Tommy had woken up. Once he was fully coherent he helped Jesse with Joel’s body. I watched them carry him up the stairs before turning back to Ellie and Dina. She’d stopped sobbing but I could still see the tears dripping down to her chin. I could tell Dina was trying to keep from crying, she wanted to be there for Ellie but she also needed to grieve. Grief seemed to be the latest trend this week.

”Can youn um..can you help her while I go ask Tommy about something” Dina asked quietly. I nodded and took her place beside Ellie.

Ellie leaned against me, trying to steady out her breathing. “Hey..” I get her attention, “Look at me El..breathe with me..” I whispered to her. I can hear the shakiness in her breath as she tries.

”Here..” I place her hand on my sternum. “Feel it..” I ask, eyes darting between our hand and her eyes.

She nods “Yeah..yeah I feel it” she murmurs, closing her eyes. I hear her breathing steady out and let go of her wrist.

She leaves her hand there for a moment, like she’s not sure if she’ll be okay without it. I watch her as she opens her eyes and looks around the room.

”They already took care of him..they’re probably waiting for us.” I explain to her.

She nods and pulls herself up, holding her hand out to me. I smile slightly and accept her help. We walk upstairs and see they’ve brought our horses down too.

“Ellie you’re gonna ride with Angelica” Tommy says, making sure Joel is secured to the back of his horse.

Before we can say anything about it Ellie catches sight of Joel. I see how she almost breaks again. “C’mon” I nudge her, and motion to Cassie. I pull myself up onto her and pull Ellie up behind me. On the ride back to Jackson I can feel her leaning against my back, I can tell her head is turned so she can see Joel. God I feel horrible. If we hadn't of been smoking maybe we would've been able to stop this.

Series Masterlist

Chapter IV - The Aquarium

~ April 4th 2038

Abby didn’t return back to Juno’s room last night, nor did she return to her own. Manny claimed that he hadn’t seen her since they left the FOB but Juno didn’t exactly believe that. Owen also happened to be missing. At least if they were together they were safe. Juno hoped they were safe. She decided she needed to ask Manny again. Maybe he didn’t tell yesterday because of all the people around. Now she could knock two birds with one stone or something like that. She could see if Abby was there and if she wasn’t she’d ask Manny where she’d run off too.

When Juno arrives she knocks gently on their door. When Manny opens the door he looks a little surprised. 

“Hey Manny, I uh, I just came to see if Abby was back” she explains. Manny sighs softly and motions for her to come in. When she realizes Abby is in fact not here she frowns and turns back to Manny. “Look I’ll tell you where she is but you can’t go blabbing okay?” 

She nods “I won’t say a word” 

“She went off to the aquarium, by the ferris wheel” He tells her quietly.

“Is that where Owen is too?” she asks tentatively.

Manny nods “You can’t tell anybody though, they’ll go after him for shooting Danny” he warns.

“Okay..I won’t say anything, cover for me?” 

Manny huffs softly but agrees. He knew even he said no that Juno would leave to find Abby and Owen. She thanks him before leaving to pack her things. After around an hour she leaves the same way Manny said to. 

She assumes she’s going the way Abby went because of the lack of infected. On her way to the aquarium she has to sneak past a few scars. They’re talking about some apostate, at least that’s what she thinks she heard. She manages to get past them and closer to the aquarium. Juno makes her way through the last of the shrubbery and to the aquarium doors. She boosts herself up through the small window and makes her way inside. 

“Owen..?” She calls out, following up with, “Abby?”

When she’s met with silence she progresses further inside until she finds Owen and Mel arguing in hushed tones. She sits and listens for a moment but it seems she’s too late.

”God arguing with you is always so pointless Owen” Mel snaps.

”That’s because we don’t sit down and talk anymore”  Owen snaps back.

”Cause you always lie to me” She yells at him and the room goes quiet. 

After a moment Mel turns to leave and sees Juno in the doorway. She almost feels bad that the younger girl had been standing there. Juno looks between the two of them, she’s starting to feel awkward. After Mel walks past her she goes up to Owen.

”What was that about..?” She asks hesitantly.

“Nothing” He says firmly.

Juno nods slowly before speaking again, “Any clue where Abby is?”

”She just left, no clue if she’ll be back anytime soon, or at all” Owen murmurs the last bit.

”You get into a fight with her too?” Her tone has a bit more bite to it than she intended. 

“Seriously Juno?” He frowns at her.

”Sorry sorry, It just sounded like something was wrong between you guys too” She explains.

Owen sighs and sits down. He eases his sister's nerves telling her that everything will be fine soon. They go on to talk about what happened with Danny, how the scars are getting closer. They also talk about normal things though, how they’ve been and other normal sibling stuff. It's been years since they sat down and talked like this. Hell It’s been so long the fireflies were still up and running. After a little while longer Owen got up to make some food for the both of them and Mel. In his absence Juno went to talk with Mel. Maybe it was a little invasive but she wanted to know what had happened.

“Hey Mel” Juno softly calls out from the doorway.

Mel looks over her shoulder at her, tensing a bit. 

Juno speaks up again “Just wanted to check in, and um..I also wanted to ask what that was about”

“Owen didn’t tell you?” Mel asks, looking back at the water.

“Nah..he said it was nothing, but obviously it was something”

“That’s typical for him I guess” Mel sighs before continuing “Well..to be blunt he slept with Abby last night” Juno freezes up behind her, unable to speak up. “I didn’t even really accuse him, he accidentally ratted himself out.” she explains.

“They..slept together?” Juno asks, praying she somehow heard wrong.

Mel nods “Yeah, I can barely believe it either” she turns to look at the blonde.

Mel looks like she’s barely holding herself together. Juno is trying to comprehend it all. She knows she shouldn’t really be mad at Abby but she is.

“She’ll probably be back soon” Mel says.

Juno nods “Alright, Owen um..made food by the way, it’ll probably be done soon”

A few hours later Alice started barking at something while Mel and Juno were still eating. They both got up and headed towards Alice. As they got closer they could hear Owen and Abby’s panicking voices. 

“Alice!” Mel called out, silencing the dog.

“Lev put your bow down” Abby spoke warily, “It’s okay”

“Who are those kids” Juno asked, peeking over Owen’s shoulder

“Look, they saved my life” Abby explains.

“They’re scars Abby” Owen snaps.

Juno swats at his shoulder “That doesn’t matter”

They bicker for a moment before Mel interrupts them. Abby introduces the kids as Lev and Yara. There’s another short silence and then Mel motions for Abby to follow her. They lay Yara down and talk about what they need to amputate her arm. Since they had practically nothing at the aquarium Abby said she’d head out with Lev. Juno was about to offer to come but decided against it. She knew that now wasn’t a good time to talk to Abby about last night. 

When Abby returns with the supplies Mel is quick to start the procedure. Owen was..somewhere..which left Juno, Abby, and Lev. Lev wasn’t up for long, falling asleep against the wall while he waited for Yara. This left Abby and Juno.

”Hey..” Juno murmurs, walking up behind Abby.

”Hey Jun” Abby turns to look at the shorter blonde.

They’re both quiet for a moment. Surprisingly, Abby breaks the silence this time. “You seem angry” she points out.

“I..I am..I’m also a little hurt” She nearly whispers, she’s never been this vulnerable with Abby.

”Did..um..something happen while I was gone” Abby asks.

”Sort of, I found out something while you were gone” Juno pauses, “I’d bet you know what I mean already”

Abby sighs, Juno can’t tell if it’s regret, frustration, or both.

”Look..it was a shitty thing to do..It wasn’t supposed to happen” Abby starts off, “I know Mel is angry at us a-

“I’m not worried about Mel right now” Juno interrupts.

They both pause, Abby isn’t sure what this is about now.

”I..dammit..it’s stupid..but I thought..we..you” Juno stops and takes a breath. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to do this. 

“You thought what” Abby asks tentatively.

Juno takes another breath, she’s started to tremble. “I think I just got the wrong idea over the past month” 

“Jun..” Abby trails off, not sure what to say.

”I just thought that..yknow..the feelings were mutual” her voice cracks.

Abby feels her heart drop as she hears Juno’s breath catch. She looks down at her, not sure how to comfort her. 

“Owen and I aren’t like that” she says after a moment.

”But..you-

Abby stops her “It was a weak moment, I regretted it the second it was over” 

Juno finally looks up at her, her own eyes wet with unshed tears. Without a second thought Abby pulls her in, holding her close. They both relax a bit in each other's arms. Juno was still unsure about how Abby felt. 

Abby pulls back just enough to wipe Juno’s tears. “We’ll figure all of this out soon okay” she speaks softly. Juno nods in response, relaxing further into Abby’s arms. She was more hopeful now than she had been a few hours ago.

series masterlist

Chapter I - Not Quite Seattle

SUMMARY: Angelica and Julietta’s plan was to get to the WLF, a group of (according to Julietta’s father) old fireflies. With less than a month of travel time left Juliette gets infected. Angelica travels on her own until she tires herself out. She blacks out and next thing she knows she’s in a room with and dark haired man and an auburn haired, freckled girl who are offering to bring her to ‘Jackson’

AUGUST 30 2037 - PIERRE SD

Angelica’s pov

There’s too much open space in this damn city. Too many infected and too much sun. I looked over at Jules who was laying on the couch opposite of me. She looked so peaceful but so uncomfortable at the same time. She almost looked like a shrimp because of her sunburn.

”Hey babe..” I called out to her. Julia opens her eyes and looks over at me. I stifle a laugh before speaking again. “You look like a shrimp”

She feigns offense before snapping back “Yeah? Well you look like a lobster”

”I do not- do I seriously?” I ask in a quieter tone, now concerned for my appearance.

She nods with a chuckle as she pulls herself up from the couch. I watch her start to gather her things, admiring the smoothness in her motions. I pull myself up and grab my own stuff.

”C’mon, we aren’t gonna get across the country just sitting here.” Julia smiles, stepping up onto the ledge, holding her hand out to me.

I grab her hand and pull myself up, carefully dropping down from the window. We make it to one of those ‘Welcome to the city’ signs before we hit another group of infected. It’s a rough fight, far too many clickers for my liking. We manage it though. After the last one drops Julia takes a minute to lean back against a light pole. 

“I’m clean, you?” I pant, looking over at her.

”I..I’m clean” Julia breathes, pushing herself upright.

”Good..c’mon let’s make the most of the sunlight” I push, holding her hand out to her.

We continue down the quieter streets as we get through half of the next city. Making it to Washington was not going to be easy. Julia’s dad better have been right about this ‘WLF’. 

After just a few more hours we both start to slow down. We needed a break. Julia points out what looks like a convenience shop. We pry the boards off the door but before I can try opening it Julia stops me. 

There’s this look in her eyes. Guilt? Regret? Well, those are nearly the same aren’t they.

Her next words are probably the worst thing I’ve ever heard.

”Angel..I got bit” she utters, her eyes downcast.

My breath hitches, for a moment I can’t bring myself to speak. I feel my cheeks become wet with tears. ”No..” I finally choke out. “No, no you’re lying” She couldn’t be bit.

She brings me into her arms, guiding my head to the crook of her neck. I sob against her skin, balling my fists in her shirt. ”This isn’t how it was supposed to go..” I whisper through tears “We’re supposed to do this together Jules..We have to make it to Seattle..”

“You’ll make it..” She murmurs.

“We were supposed to make it! Not just me..It was supposed to be us. It’s always been us!!” I yell at her. I want to keep yelling. Tell her she’s stupid for getting bit, tell her that she should’ve told me sooner. We could’ve amputated it. We could’ve made it. 

“Angel..promise you’ll make it to the WLF..actually, fuck that.. just make it to a civilization, somewhere safe. I just want you to make it. I want you to live for me” She whispers to me. 

She runs her fingers through my hair, trying but failing to soothe me. Occasionally she whispers a ‘sorry’ and an ‘i love you’. I can’t do anything but sob and tell her I love her too while I hold her.

”Get inside” she pleads.

”No..no I’m not going without you” I cling onto her harder, I can’t let go.

I feel her shifting in my arms and next thing I know there’s a loud crack. Something warm has splattered on the side of my face. I don’t have to look to know it’s Julia’s blood. Suddenly my arms drop and along with them Julia crumbles to the ground. Blood spills out around her head, staining the road. I sink to my knees beside her still warm body. I watch the blood pour out, not crying or moving. 

I don’t know how long I sat there before I finally moved. The first thing I do is take her firefly pendant 

I spend the next week or so traveling nearly nonstop. Pushing myself to the brink of passing out before I take a break. Fighting against infected in this state was certainly not ideal. I’ve ended up writing letters to Julia, telling her things I hadn’t gotten the chance to tell her, asking questions I never had the guts to ask. I did all this even though I knew I’d get no answer. No new information. The only new thing I had now was August 30th. A day that no matter how hard I want to, I will never be able to forget.

By now I’ve been walking for nearly 10 hours. I’m starting to get dizzy, my exhaustion is weighing heavier on me. I can’t stop. I push myself for another hour or so before my body gives up and I pass out.  The next thing I know is I’m waking up in a dimly lit room on a mildly uncomfortable couch. There’s two other people in the room. A man with dark hair and a girl with auburn hair. I jerk up into a sitting position, reaching for my gun only to find it isn’t there. 

“Hey woah woah” The dark haired guy slowly stood up, his hand raised slightly.

My breaths were heavy as I pressed further back into the couch. I look between both of them. Both of them seem cautious but also concerned.

”We’re not going to hurt you” The guy speaks up again.

”Who the hell are you” I snap.

”I’m Jesse, this is Ellie” he pauses like he’s waiting for me to speak. When I stay quiet he continues. “We found you passed out in the woods just a couple miles away” 

I studied them both before relaxing slightly. If they wanted to kill me they would’ve already. Right..?

“You can come back to Jackson with us, unless you’ve got family somewhere else” Jesse spoke again.

”Jackson..?” I ask tentatively.

”It’s where we’re from, it’s just a small town over the hill” Ellie explains.

I consider it for a moment, before nodding slightly. “Okay..They won’t mind you bringing back a um a stranger?”

Ellie shakes her head “Maria will question you a bit but she’ll be happy to see a new face” 

“She’d be even happier to put a name to that face” Jesse chirps up, reminding me that I haven’t given them my name.

”It’s Angelica” I speak up a bit more, feeling a bit more safe with these strangers.

They lead me out to their horses and Jesse helps me onto his. The ride back to their town is short but feels like forever. When we arrive at the gates they let us in and this blonde woman meets us at the stables. I assume this is Maria, she seems to be in charge around here. 

“Who’s this” she asks in a firm tone.

”This is Angelica, Ellie and I found her passed out not too far from here” Jesse explains.

Maria gives me a once over “Well you don’t seem like much trouble”

I’m not sure if I should be relieved or offended by her statement.

She motions for me to follow and I do so. She asks me more questions as she shows me around. I answer all of them truthfully and by the time we’re finished we arrive at an empty looking home. 

“This is where you’ll be staying, it’s furnished and there’s a few coats inside but not much else” she says, pulling a small notepad from her pocket and a pencil. She hands it to me before speaking again “Make me a list of your sizes and any allergies you may have and I’ll bring by somethings for you” 

I quickly right down the list before handing it back to her. 

“Perfect, now you remember where the medical center is?” She asks.

”Yes ma’am” I nod. 

“Just call me Maria” she smiles, “I want you to head down there and get checked out, you seem a little underweight”

Now that she mentioned it, I probably am underweight. I nod and we part ways. When I make it to the medical center there’s only two people there who aren’t workers. A tallish, old, blond man and a dark haired girl with some faint freckles. I didn’t pay much mind to them, following the doctor who had appeared in front of me.

The doctor sat me down and took my vitals before asking if I had any pre-existing issues. I told her about my scoliosis and my chicken allergy. She jotted something down and told me I was free to go. I head back to the house Maria had shown me earlier. There were two boxes on the front porch with a note; ‘come see me at the tipsy bison tomorrow morning if you need anything -Maria’. I smiled slightly, picking up the boxes and bringing them in. I spent the rest of my evening unpacking new clothes and other necessities that Maria had brought to me. I headed upstairs to the bedroom and saw that auburn haired girl walking into what looked like a garage. Her name is..um..El..Elaina? Elliot? Wait, Ellie! Her name was Ellie. She must be my neighbor for the time being.

Series Masterlist

Her Angel

Masterlist

WARNINGS:weed, minor character death?, nsfw later on(nothing too bizarre) 

Chapter I - Not Quite Seattle - 1.6K words

Chapter II - Grief; The Latest Trend - 1.5K words

Chapter III -

Main Masterlist

Chapter III Unspoken Desires

~ March 17th 2038

“We’ll talk about it later” 

The words rang in Abby’s mind. They had been for the past two weeks. Juno had also been avoiding her for the past two weeks. She even went as far as changing the patrol partners behind Abby’s back. Why would she do  all of this? Why wouldn’t she just tell Abby what the problem was? Why didn’t she just say she didn’t wanna talk about it? These were the questions Abby had been asking herself again and again. They grew close quickly once they learned to trust each other. Now they seemed to be growing apart. All because Juno was too scared of ruining it all.

Juno’s days of avoiding Abby come to their inevitable end when they both get called to the FOB. Abby arrives first, not knowing that Juno will also be arriving soon. When Juno does get there the two of them look at each other for just a moment and she’s filled with regret. She knows Abby’s been trying to contact her and she knows now there’s no other choice. Isaac clears his throat and Juno takes a seat. Isaac wants them back on patrol together, to take out a Scar camp that’s in WLF territory. It’s clearly not optional.

After the meeting with Isaac they left the FOB and ‘coincidentally’ both headed for the mess hall. The walk there is unsurprisingly awkward. They’re quiet but not because they want to be. 

“Abby..we should talk about this..” Juno murmured. 

“Let’s get some food, then we’ll go somewhere less crowded” Abby suggests.

Juno nods and follows after Abby. Once they get their food they head to the stadium and up to Juno’s room. They sit on the floor opposite of each other. 

“So..wanna tell me why you’ve been avoiding me like the plague?” Abby questions in a casual tone.

Juno winces internally “Look..I..I’ve wanted to talk to you about it all. I can’t though..” 

“Why not? Is there somebody else involved or something?” Abby asks.

“Yes, well..kinda?”She questions her own words.

Abby doesn’t say anything, looking at Juno with a hint of concern.  She’s  heard plenty from Owen about how hard it is for Juno to share her feelings with other people.

Juno takes a breath “I can’t tell you”  she murmurs.

Abby sighs in frustration, debating whether or not to push the topic. 

“I’m..I’m sorry..This wasn’t how I thought this would go..” she looked up at Abby, “but you didn’t do anything wrong, y’know” she murmurs, looking away again.

“Right..” Abby nods, not sure how to continue their conversation from this point. She’s not even sure if Juno wants to keep talking. “I..I’ll see you later” she sighs.

Juno watches as Abby gets up from her seat, watching her leave the mess hall.

~ April 3rd 2038

“The scar camp shouldn’t be that far from here” Abby utters, looking at the map Isaac provided.

“We’re sure they’re Scars and not some strangers.” Juno asks, keeping an eye out for any infected.

“Why are you questioning it?” Abby snaps slightly.

“Well the guy who said something about it is blind in one eye” she starts off, “plus he said he saw it from a distance”

“Well if they aren’t Scars we’ll..I don’t know” Abby huffs in frustration.

They continued making their way to the camp, remaining cautious of their surroundings. When they finally arrived at the camp they could see brown coats hanging from the tree limbs. They were likely being aired out from the recent rain. 

“Definitely Scars..” Juno mutters. 

“There’s only three coats..but there might be more of them” Abby whispers, pulling her rifle off of her shoulder.

The two girls stalk closer to the camp, weapons at the ready. From their spot in the bushes they see two Scars emerge from one of the tents. They’re completely oblivious to the two wolves. Abby motions for Juno to ready her rifle as she does the same. They take their shots, both hitting the Scars square in the head. Two more emerge from the other tents, handguns at the ready. One of them manages to shoot Abby in the shoulder before both blondes take them out. Once they’re sure nobody else is around, Juno speaks up.

“Hey..sit down and let me patch you up” Juno speaks softly, motioning to the tree stump behind Abby.

Abby nods, sitting down carefully. She moves her clothing to the side so Juno can help her. Juno sits in front of her and pulls out the small med pack she had in her bag. Once she finished she notices Abby’s shins are pretty cut up from the thorns on the bushes they’d been hiding in. Juno moves back and moves Abby’s pant leg up.

“Shit- I didn’t even notice that” Abby murmured, looking down at her own legs and the other blonde’s hands.

Juno just hums in acknowledgment. She wipes off the blood before disinfecting the cuts and bandages them. Once she’s finished she glances back up at Abby. They lock eyes but don’t speak. The silence between them is thick with the weight of unspoken words. Neither girl can bring herself to speak. Juno gathers her things before standing. For a moment Abby watches her before getting up herself. 

With their job completed they start to head back to the stadium. Just before they arrive Abby tentatively grabs Juno’s shoulder. “Wait..” she whispers. Juno stops in her tracks, turning to face her. They lock eyes and Abby is almost at a loss for words. 

“Juno..I need you to tell me why you were avoiding me” she speaks louder than she had before.

Juno’s breath hitches “Let’s get inside..then I promise I’ll tell you..everything” 

The two blondes sit on opposite ends of Juno’s bed. Juno keeps her eyes averted as she starts to speak. “So..so basically um..” She stutters, starting to pick at her fingers.

Abby gently grabs Juno’s hands in her own, pulling them apart.

”Relax Jun.. you act like I’m gonna bite your head off” Abby jokes, trying to lighten the mood. 

Juno takes a breath and looks up at Abby  “I’m..We..um..I love you” she says it like more of a question.

Abby looks at her for a moment before the realization hits her. “You’re- oh- oh my god” Before she can speak again there’s a knock at the door. 

“Come in” Juno calls out before muttering something unintelligible.

Manny walks in and looks at Abby “There you are, I’ve been looking for you” he pauses and looks between them both “I didn’t mean to interrupt but Isaac wants us at the FOB remember.” 

“Right, give us just a sec yeah?” Abby urges

Manny nods and walks back out. The blondes face each other again. “I promise, we can get into this again when I get back” 

Juno nods and watches Abby leave. She feels rejected even though she knows that isn’t the case, at least not yet. At this point there was really no telling what Abby would say. Maybe she was disgusted, maybe she was happy, maybe she’s confused.

Series Masterlist

This is the face claim I found for Juno a while back

Chapter II Reunion & Reflections

~ February 24th 2038

The ‘Salt Lake Crew’ has finally returned to the base. After about 4 months they’re back and their goal has been accomplished.

For the past week or two Juno has been spending her free time close to the gate so that she could observe the people coming in. Well today was her lucky day. Just as she was getting comfortable the gate opened up and she saw Owen and Abby walk through with the others. She watched them walk to the medical center, deciding to let them settle back in before she went pestering them.

After a few hours Juno went looking for Owen but ended up finding Manny and Jordan instead.

“Hey Juno,” Manny called out, seeing the lost look on her face “Who’re you looking for?” He asks once he has her attention.

“Owen, any idea where he is?” She asks, looking between them both.

“Haven’t seen him since we got back” Jordan chimed in then looked at Manny for his answer. “Me either, your best best would be Mel or Abby” Manny pats her shoulder, “Hope you find him”

“Thank you both” She smiles at the two men before heading off to the medical center.

She finds Mel at the medical center and asks her if she’s seen Owen. Mel shakes her head and tells her he ran off before she could ask where he was going. Juno huffs and thanks her before running off. After a couple minutes of searching for both Owen and Abby she huffs and decides she’ll quit looking for now. He’ll come find her before night comes.

He did not come to find her before sunset. Abby did though. Well not exactly. Abby came to find her around 9pm.

A soft knock on the door pulled Juno’s focus away from her book. She got up from her chair and padded over to the door. She pulled it open expecting to see her brother but was pleasantly surprised by Abby instead.

“Hey..Owen uh wanted me to check up on you, y’know since we were gone” Abby says, leaning against the door frame.

Juno smiles at the taller woman “I’m alright, how is he? I haven’t actually talked to him since you guys got back”

“He’s alright, the trip shook all of us a bit so he just needs some time away from..everything” She explains.

Juno nods, “right, well I’m glad he’s doing okay” there’s an awkward silence for a moment “How are you doing?” she asks tentatively.

Abby doesn’t answer immediately, “I’m okay, just a little sleep deprived”

“I bet, you should get to bed, get back on your sleep schedule” Juno suggests.

“Yeah, you’re right” there’s a pause in the blonde’s words, “I’ll see you in the morning?” she asks.

Juno nods “Yeah- yeah absolutely” she grins wider “goodnight Abby”

“Night Juno” Abby waves, walking off to her own room.

Juno watches the other woman walk off for a moment before turning back into her own bedroom. She takes a moment, thinking about the interaction. She’s only spent a month in total with Abby but something felt a little off. Maybe it was just because of the trip to Jackson. She said that everyone had been a little shaken up so maybe that was it.

~ March 2nd 2038

Juno thought she was losing it, she had to be losing it actually. There was no way she was starting to fall for Abby. Her brother’s ex. There was no way. Except there was because she was absolutely falling for her. Day by day she became more infatuated with the older woman. Speaking of Abby, Juno had patrol with her in a few hours.

“Jesus, again?” Juno murmurs to herself as she braids her hair, “I’m always on patrol with her”

She complained as if she hated the older woman.

The next few hours went by quickly, so did the first half of patrol until Abby started asking questions.

“Hey, Jun are you doing alright” Abby asks, holding up a garage door for Juno to duck under.

“Huh- yeah um” Juno stops herself before she starts unnecessarily stuttering.

Abby gives her a once over “You’re quiet” she states simply.

“I uh..I’m just a little tired” It wasn’t a lie but that wasn’t why she’d been so quiet.

“..Alright then”

The silence that follows is awkward but neither girl can dwell on it for long. Both of their thoughts are interrupted by the scream of an infected. They maneuver through the dimly lit building quietly, listening for any more screams or rustling. Along the way Abby used a shiv to take out a few unsuspecting Runners and Juno did the same with her bow. They were doing good until they came across a dim open room. The room was filled with an unsettling sound coming from the five Clickers inside. Two stood idly, in unnatural curled stances while the other three seemed to be searching. Abby took one in the corner while Juno shot the idle two with her bow. She aimed for the fourth one while Abby made her way to the fifth. Before Juno could steady her shot she was sent flying to the floor with the wind knocked out of her. A Stalker laid on top of her, trying to get a bite.

“Shit-!” She gasped, trying to pry the creature off of her. “Come on, get off!”

The last two Clickers in the room started to make their way towards Juno. Abby took them out with her rifle before rushing to help Juno with the Stalker. She kicked it off before shooting it in the head. Juno took a moment to gather herself before taking Abby’s hand and standing.

“Are you bit?” Abby asks a bit impatiently.

“I'm clean” Juno confirms, grabbing her own rifle and scanning the room.

It was quiet. Eerily quiet.

“Keep an eye out” Abby murmurs.

They move forward, cautious of any dark corners or doorways. The building is still and silent as they progress. It seems empty but something is screaming at Juno telling her it isn’t. Her grip in her rifle is tight. The next room they enter is a mess, there’s clutter and furniture scattered throughout the room. Abby starts to take her next step but Juno grabs her shoulder, her other hand motioning to the rusted filing cabinet. Or rather what’s beside it. There’s a figure hunched beside it. It wasn’t a Clicker from what they could see. It likely wasn’t a Runner either. Was it a person? Or was it just a Stalker in plain sight?

The figure's head shot up as Juno took a step forward. The room became still and they realized it was indeed another person. They both relaxed slightly but didn’t lower their weapons. Before either girl could speak, the stranger sprung towards them. Without hesitation Abby raised her rifle and took the shot. The crack of the gun was followed by the thud of the body then again, silence.

“Come on..we gotta finish clearing the building..” Abby mutters, clearly a bit shaken up.

Juno follows after her. The building seems still again as they venture upstairs. The silence between them is full of stolen glances, some of concern, others of desire. The silence is broken by the cracking of floor boards beneath them.

Before either of them can get to a more solid spot the flooring caves in. Right through the previous floor as well. They end up in what they can only assume is a basement.

“Ugh..this seems to be a trend around here..falling through floors” Abby grunts, trying to pull her bag out from under the debris.

“Yeah seems like i-” Juno cuts herself off as she hears the familiar clicking. “Abby..” she whispers.

Abby moves quickly but quietly, pulling Juno into the far corner. Both of their bags are still stuck in the debris but there wasn’t time to grab either of them yet. The girls are flush against each other back-to-front. Juno reaches for the gun in her thigh holster but realizes she lost it in the fall.

“Shit..” she murmurs, opting for the switchblade tucked into her waistband instead.

She peels her body away from Abby’s with hesitance, lurking towards the Clicker. She takes it out from behind and lays it down. After listening for more infected they stand up and grab their bags. After a few minutes they get back to the floor they arrived on.

“Alright, time to get the fuck outta here” Juno murmurs.

“You couldn’t be more right” Abby huffs, leading the way to the door.

Once they’re out they decide to take a breather. They sit down against a tree in the more open area, leaning against each other.

Juno finally breaks the silence “Thank you” she nearly whispers. Her eyes are closed and her head is leaned back against the stump. Abby looks down at her before responding with a soft “for what?”. Juno huffs in slight amusement at the other girl’s question “For saving my life”

“Oh..anytime Jun” Abby smiles slightly.

Juno opens her eyes to look at the other blonde and her face flushes slightly. They were too close. She sits up, turning to face Abby while also backing up. More silence falls over the two of them.

“You’re too quiet” Abby points out.

“Thought you liked the quiet?” Juno asks.

“Not with you” Her face says that she doesn’t realize what she’s saying until after she’s said it.

They look at each other for a moment before Juno clears her throat and speaks up again. “We should head back..”

“Juno-” Abby starts but gets cut off by the smaller woman “Later..we..we’ll talk about it later.”

Abby nods, showing that she respects her decision. The walk back to the base is quiet, they don’t run into any more infected. Thankfully they don’t run into any Scars either. They part ways after arriving back, Juno going off to find Owen and Abby going to her shared room.

Juno ends up finding Owen in the mess hall, he looks like he’s waiting for somebody.

“Hey, Owen, can we talk?” She slides into the seat across from him.

“Yeah- you look a little stressed” He comments, studying his sister’s face.

“A little more than a little” she murmurs, she takes a breath before continuing “I kinda don’t wanna say it now..jesus”

“C’mon it can’t be horrible” he reassures.

“Would you consider me..being in love with your ex as horrible?” she asks hesitantly.

Owen’s jaw drops “are you serious?” There's no anger behind his words, just pure shock.

“Yeah..” she puts her face in her hands.

Owen takes a breath before continuing. He assures Juno that he isn’t upset with her before anything else. He tells her that if that’s the way she wants to go then go for it. She almost can’t believe her ears. When Mel shows up she takes it as her sign to leave but not before saying bye to the both of them. She heads back to her own room with things to reflect on and things to prepare for.

Series Masterlist

One Moore to Another

Masterlist

Abby Anderson x Juno Moore(my oc!)

Chapter I - Finding the Light - 541 words

Chapter II - Reunion & Reflections - 1.8k words

Chapter III - Unspoken Desires - 1.2k words

Chapter IV - The Aquarium

main masterlist

Chapter I 'Finding the Light'

~ September 12th 2037

Juno struggled against the arms that held her down, kicking and screaming. She refused to let this happen. She couldn’t let them die when they were so close to that base.

Just a few feet away she was watching their nearly limp bodies get beat into the floor by these traders. Traders that claimed her parents ‘sold them short’.

“Leave them alone” she pleaded, nearly choking on her own sobs “please..hic..don’t kill them” she couldn’t even scream anymore because of how long she’d been screaming for them to stop.

The man blocking the door pulled his gun on Juno but was stopped by the one holding her down. He claimed there was no need to kill the kid. Juno could tell they were arguing but couldn’t tell what they were saying. Her eyes were locked on the sight before her, her head was pounding. Before she knew it the men were fleeing, the only sounds left were her own cries, shuffling down the hall, and whistling. She quickly moved to where her parents' bodies laid, carelessly thrown beside each other.

“Ma….Ma..Dad..?” Her voice trembled as did her body “No..dammit no..please..please I still need you..” she sobbed harder, hiccuping and coughing. She leaned back against the wall, pulling her knees to her chest. “No…no..no please, please come back..please” She pleads, rocking herself until she inevitably falls asleep.

~ September 20th 2037

Juno approaches the gates of the WLF base. Limping due to a sprained ankle that hasn’t been treated properly yet. She’s stopped by soldiers before she can get too close to it.

“Please..I’m..I’m just looking for my brother, Owen” She explains to them.

Two of the soldiers share a glance before nodding. “Open the gate, she’s just one girl, plus she’s injured” One of them speaks up.

Juno’s eyes light up with hope. He’s here. They open up the gate and one of them leads her to the medical center. “Mel, can you fix up her ankle and these cuts, I gotta go find Owen”

The dark haired woman, supposedly named Mel, looked between the soldier and Juno. She nods before motioning for Juno to follow after. The two of them head back to an empty space for Mel to work. Juno sits down and Mel starts to work on her ankle. After a while the soldier comes back with Owen and a woman.

“Juno..?” He asks hesitantly, studying the frail looking girl in front of him. The blond to his right also studied her.

Juno hesitates as well before speaking, “Owen?”

Owen surges forward, pulling Juno into his arms. Mel and the blonde woman share a glance of confusion before looking back at the pair. They hold each other before Owen steps back to get a look at her.

“How’d all this happen?” He eyes a particular set of stitches on her bicep.

“Some traders to us on the way here” Juno explains, her voice quiet.

“Us?” Owen asks, his eyes darting around the room for a moment. “Mom and dad are with you?” Juno shakes her head at her brother’s second question. She couldn’t bring herself to speak, to tell him what happened. She didn't have to though. He could tell by the pained look on her face. “Oh Jun..”

Series Masterlist

What if, ….everything that happened….was a bad dream?!

(Me right now)

// i'm always looking for you //