I Can See Him Cracking Jokes In Between (some Are Dad Jokes) - Blog Posts

Could I request the vice housewardens + Ruggie play fighting with the reader, is there a certain way they initiate if they play fight at all? Do they smack talk? I NEED TO KNOW

Also don't forget to drink water and consume your fruits and veggies 💛

This request made me so happy and it was hilarious to think about someone fighting a bunch of cryptids for fun. Anyway yes absolutely I hope this if acceptable and thank you for reminding me, I am currently drinking water now

Okay so the vice housewardens (or second in commands, which is more accurate) are the feistiest group at NRC. They are all shady or ready to deck someone which makes me think that it’s simply a trait housewardens look for. I’d imagine they all play-fight, but where and how varies greatly. Also the tags look so gnarly but I swear none of them are that violent

Hit me with your best shot

Characters: Trey, Ruggie, Jade, Jamil, Rook, Ortho, Lilia, Floyd (mentioned)

Tw// fighting, violence, drowning (mentions), biting, hunting, Rook typical behavior, Leech typical behavior, food, bruises/marks, blood mention

Trey

Definitely a play fighter in the casual way.

Most likely to poke at you, smack you with a pillow, throw something at you, etc.

He’s probably the second gentlest in this regard because he’s human and not training to beat the fuck out of someone

When you play fight it’s probably because one of you is being snippy after a long day of dealing with other peoples bullshit.

You aren’t likely to end up actually injured or bruised or anything, but you may end up wrestling on the floor of Trey’s room or smacking each other with pillows.

He’s an older brother so he knows restraint but the urge to pull hair and smack the shit out of someone is strong.

Instead he just pins you to the ground and dramatically lays on you to keep you there

You guy definitely have a food fight.

Not like, with finished dishes or anything, but in a ‘I dropped some ice from the freezer and instead of kicking it under the fridge, we’re playing ice soccer in the kitchen at 3 am’ kind of way.

Or sometimes when you have leftover frosting from a cake he’s made you end up flinging it at each other.

If you ever cover his mouth he will lick it and give you an evil smirk

His trash talk is somehow both very good and very bad at the same time.

He gets into it but he also uses stupid insults like “you’re a poopface” mostly because he wants you to know he’s joking because onetime he called riddle an asshole and he cried so now he’s careful

Please take a boxing class with him you two would have so much fun

Ruggie

Initiates by walking up and biting your shoulder or sometimes just shoving you and running.

If you accept playfighting him at least once be prepared he’s going to do it a lot.

He has so much pent up aggression.

Half of the fighting is smack talk and boy does he have a MOUTH.

Hopefully you have thick skin because otherwise when he says shit like “you look like a gazelle ass fucked a cactus” you might actually cry

Definitely rougher when he plays.

Expect claw marks, bites, bruises, and sore limbs when you’re done fighting.

Try to ignore the stares you get from everyone when they see a bite mark on your shoulder because how do you explain you didn’t do that you were actually just beating the shit out of each other

He will start a fight literally anywhere and you two probably go at it for at least an hour before he gives up

If he ends up drawing blood he’s frantically making sure you’re alright and patching you up

Probably play fights with you as warmup for spelldrive practice.

This entails him coming to your room, pouncing on you to wake you up, then maniacally laughing when you fight him off with a scowl.

But on the bright side, he brought you breakfast (Leona paid for it, shhh) so it wasn’t for nothing

Jade

Jade isn’t one to play fight normally, he has a reputation to keep up.

So he won’t usually initiate that.

If you start to goad him into it, he just gives you a menacing smile then turns you over to Floyd to play like that.

If you still insist on playing with him, he will literally just pick you up and sling you over his shoulder until you promise to stop.

Then he drops you on the ground.

Now, that’s how it goes on land, anyway. But in water? Hooboy, hope you can hold your breath.

Jade’s third favorite thing to do is drag people underwater (the first two are hiking in the mountains and teasing Azul) and luckily for you, he remembers just how much you like play fighting!

And since Jade’s in the water, chances are Floyd is too.

They rarely do fun things without each other.

So now you’re going to be fighting for your life from two mischievous mer-eels.

Jade wears a darkly serene expression as he asks you whatever could be the matter and Floyd looks like he’s won the fucking jackpot when you surface from getting dragged into the water with them

You will not win this playfight, because there is little distinguishing it from a real one.

The only difference is that they aren’t actually trying to harm you, but you probably won’t realize that when Jade repeatedly drags you under water to see how long you can hold your breath, trapping your legs with his tail.

He finds the way you beat at him with your fists pretty adorable, which is lucky because that means you won’t drown today!

You will receive 0 aftercare from him for this traumatic experience, but he may invite you to do it again.

Don’t accept it’s a tr-

Jamil

You’re not so much play-fighting Jamil as you’re training with him.

Which is probably good, it means there’s rule and a time limit.

Anyway, most of his comments are half trash talk and half trying to get a rise out of you.

Very “is that the best you’ve got?”

Sparring with him is fucking exhausting so you likely do it mostly in the evenings or when Jamil is training some other students.

Sometimes he gets way too into it and ends up mixing breakdance moves and martial arts to kick your ass.

He has knocked your feet out from under you before and he will do it again

Moves so confidently and quickly you think he might moonlight as an assassin

Chances are you’re not gonna beat him, he’s got years of experience, but you’re getting stronger and faster when you’re with him.

If he ends up hitting you too hard he apologizes quickly and you don’t usually have many bruises due to the fact he makes you wear padding and you spar on a mat

Dude can totally take a hit so you don’t really have to hold back (he prefers if you don’t, it tests him more)

so don’t be afraid to smack him around.

Genuinely appreciative of you doing this with him and makes sure to let you know every time you take up his offer to practice together

He repays you buy providing you with snacks light on the stomach after you’re done working out together, usually some lightly chilled water and a piece of fruit.

Also sends you home with leftovers of whatever he made for dinner that night

Rook

Hahahaha….oh dear lord. So listen, there’s two types of play fighting.

There’s the one you initiate, then there’s the one he initiates.

One of them is fun!

The other is straight from a horror movie

If you initiate, he’s happy to indulge, and he hits a littler harder than he means to sometimes but overall it’s pretty chill.

You two end up chasing each other around campus, playing what could be described as a really intense, violent game of tag.

By the time you’re done, you’re both covered in dirt of mud and have sticks and leaves sticking to you.

If he initiates, please don’t take his offer.

This is the scary one.

His version of play fighting is chasing you through the woods behind campus with a bow and arrow and yelling vague threats about “ahh, you’re close! I can almost smell you~” and occasionally shooting an arrow that is ENTIRELY TOO CLOSE for comfort.

If he catches up to you - or just decides this is the right moment - he’s tackling you to the ground.

He’ll tease you for losing before attacking you with tickles, the most terrifying of all weapons.

So maybe it isn’t scary in the end, since he was never gonna hurt you, but running through the forest with nobody nearby except for a guy armed with a long ranged weapon is absolutely terrifying, and there’s always the slim chance he misses….

Ortho

Gentlest of the list.

He’s more sure how much pressure to apply when play fighting, so it mostly ends up being pillow fights, or something else that’s soft.

Poking, bumping into you, very very gentle punching, that’s all on the table.

If you try to initiate, Idia will get very pissed.

All of his internal components are extremely sensitive, you can’t just smack him! And besides that, he’s tiny, and his brother! Why would you do this?

Idia is genuinely terrifying when his entire attention is focused on you, and hes pissed.

The flames of his hair are growing and flickering wildly as his gold eyes glare down into yours.

The only thing that calms him down is when Ortho begs him to

So you don’t really get to physically play fight with him anymore, but you do get to game together.

With Idia’s supervision.

He’s not going to be letting Ortho around you anymore since you decided to fight a literal innocent child

Lilia

I’m fairly certain that play fighting is Lilia’s love language.

He loves to beat the shit out of people.

Least gentle next to Jade, because he will literally grab you and throw you in the air.

You’re not in danger, but his awareness of the human limits is limited, unlike Jade.

Probably isn’t a fan of shit-talking in person, but definitely does it when he’s gaming late at night.

Probably play fight in the Diasomnia lounge.

There’s an audience there to watch you get your ass kicked by an old man, as well as to see you fling the five foot nothing bat across the room.

Most intense play fighting imaginable.

He’s a big fan of flipping people and literally just throwing people around.

He’s completely fine with people doing it back to him, he finds it fun.

Playing with him is like trying to fight black widow, except if you call for a time out he’ll let you.

Silver and Sebek both try and warn you not to do this.

They literally trained with him as children they know he does not fuck around.

You ignore their advice and end up with a broken leg and a bowl of Lilia’s soup.