This Stuff Takes Work People!!!!

Sometimes...a little Humble Pie like this allows one to create the most beautiful masterpieces.

Now excuse me while I go create. Don't you have something to create too...Artist? Writer? Go while you still have time. I hope to see you again with flushed cheeks and starry eyes as you show me your latest creation.

being an artist is humiliating

I don't think this is talked about enough.

When you put something out in the world, you have to accept the possibility you won't get anything back.

Maybe you laid your heart bare on a one-shot that got zero comments. Maybe it was a painting you spent hours working on that didn't get the engagement you wanted.

I think it might have been the reason I stopped creating, for a little while at least.

I got obsessed with the stupid little numbers and metrics. Got happy when people liked my content, got sad when it resonated with no one. My relationship with what I created was determined by my perception of how many people engaged with it.

I waited day and night for the dopamine rush of notifications. I refresh my inbox, thinking that one of these days, somebody will leave some kind of affirmation, and somehow that recognition will imbue what I created with more significance. More value, writ-large.

If it got crickets, then I've failed somehow. It just wasn't good enough, I say to myself.

For the longest time, I felt like everything I created had to prove it belonged. It all felt like a race, except I didn’t know who I was competing against, only that I always felt left behind and couldn't keep up.

That's my fault. I can't help but measure myself.

But isn’t that the universal tendency? To view our past achievements as a benchmark we have to constantly overcome? Isn’t that why we’re so satisfied to look at old works we made and see how far we’ve come?

I remember what my old teacher used to say. “You’re only as good as your last piece.” As if art exists only to constantly prove itself. As if art is forever doomed to fight for its place in this world.

Well, I'm sick of it.

And so I'm realizing, in real-time, that I don’t want to fight for my place anymore. I don’t want to pander to some stupid algorithm.

I want to create. 

I want to believe that a work of art is good simply because it exists out of necessity. Out of someone’s urgent desire to share a piece of their heart in the world because it would have been devastating to keep to themselves. That’s always been very beautiful to me. It's why there is so much heart in fanworks because of the sheer heart poured into it—a love that is as raw as an exposed nerve.

There are so many stories in your head, numerous in number and nebulous in form, that eventually come to fruition as these delicate, precious things you’ve been brave enough to summon into existence. To materialize in a timeline or dashboard. To somehow take up space in people’s minds if only briefly. 

Maybe that in itself is the miracle. That what you conjured in your head somehow made its way into something real. Whether in tiny strokes or tiny letters on a tiny screen.

Somehow, the numbers next to them don’t seem to matter as much.

i feel like we as a digital society have forgotten the important rules of the internet

Don't feed the trolls

Never give out personal information

Anonymity is the best defense

Don't click suspicious links

Don't click popups and ads

Just because it's written doesn't mean it's true

You are responsible for your own experience

There is porn of everything, act accordingly

Would you eat a purple carrot?

Considering purple carrots are a real thing, I'll try it.

Just as long as it's cooked first. But I'll do that to an orange carrot. 🥕

I mean, I want to protect the precious smol bean because she is so kind and gentle...but at the same time this IS the ONE girl who utterly defeated Lance.

Anyways, if anyone wants to portray Yellow, I think people should just compare her manga arc to the Epic Conventions. You will be very surprised how much Yellow's story lines up... including the part where Yellow went to HELL and BACK!

If you all need help with the comparison, send an ask for me to post my Pokemon fanfic involving Yellow and Lysndre. Guess who ends up crying? Hint: it's not Yellow.

I've seen a few posts talking about the mischaracterization of pokespe characters recently (agreed 100%) so I'm here to jump in with a friendly reminder of my own: Yellow is not a shy, clumsy, uwu smol bean idiot. She's kind and gentle but she's also an intelligent badass in her own right. I love her and I get irritated when I see works portraying her as a little baby that needs to be protected 24/7.

The Mice at Work, Threading the Needle painted by Beatrix Potter (1866 - 1943)

I have been looking for pictures like this. Someone needs mama cuddles.

Yearning for the mother's embrace

These Eeveeulations are so cute!!!!

What is with the Dreamers' Houses?!?! Part 3.7 Lurien's Spire - WHAT is WRONG with Lurien's Office?!?!

Welcome back! Do you remember the last part where I was talking about how Patriotic Lurien was with all the Hallownestian crests?

I was about to leave it off here, until I realized something strange. There are no King’s Idols in Lurien’s Spire. Mr.-Certified-Pale-King-Fanboy has no King’s Idol from which he would worship the Pale King. What kind of fan would not have an idol or picture of his king? Especially in his bedroom!

Again, I was going to leave it even after checking the Hollow Knight wiki. Tumblr/Ao3 artist Aspidike already wrote a whole comic on it after all, so why should I spend time on it?

Looking back on it, I really should have spent more time wondering why Lurien has no King’s Idols to worship the Pale King when HERRAH is shown to be more religious than him. The Spider Queen has a Shrine inside her den while Lurien doesn’t even have a single idol or a chapel!

I only began to look deeper at the lack of King’s Idols in Lurien’s Spire when I realized there is something else missing in the Watcher’s Spire. Take a look at the carpet in Lurien’s Office.

Why does Lurien have purple carpet that completely covers the floor? Even wrapping around the pillars leading up to his Office?  Why when everywhere else in his Spire has RED flooring and Hallownestian seals…

And that’s when it hit me. Not only are there no King’s Idols in Lurien’s Spire, but there is also nothing of the Pale King in Lurien’s Office a.k.a where he lays slumbering.

Look at Lurien’s Office again.

No painting of the Pale King, only that of the City. No massive window of the Hallownest Seal, only open windows.  There are Hallownest Seals on the banners…but no Monarach Wings.

Please, allow me to explain the importance of the lack of Monarch Wings. Take a look down below at the kinds of Hallownest Seals seen across Hallownest.

The above photo is a drawing as I suck at photoshop.

Design 1 or the Seal design is most reminiscent of the Pale King with his Monarch Wings, hence why it will be often referred to as the Monarch’s Seal in this essay.

Design 2 or the Crest design is the most often seen crest design across all of Hallownest. It is the center or base that Designs 1 & 3 form their own designs on. I often take it to mean Hallownest itself versus the Monarch’s Seal which brings to mind the Pale King.

Design 3 is the design, which to my knowledge, is only seen in the City of Tears, especially on the noble’s side of the City. Originally, I called it Plumage Design and pondered whether or not this was an allusion to the Pale King, but now I believe it is a homage to the White Lady. See the comparison down below.

Part of the reason why I am making such a big deal out of the different designs is due to the Medieval heritage the game Hollow Knight draws on. If kings, knights, and keeping your oaths to your lords is greatly important to the game, then having a coat of arms and its impact are not a stretch. We already saw this in Monomon’s portion of the essay when we realized that Monomon was the one in charge of the Teacher’s Archives. Due to the lack of Hallownestian crests (or anything of Hallownest) as well as symbols in the benches being Monomon’s mask, we concluded that the Teacher’s Archives was not part of Hallownest proper, but rather natural territory under Monomon’s direct charge.

Having three different Hallownestain crests is vital. While the standard Design 2 or the Crest design allows one to tell that the messenger is from Hallownest versus the Mosskin, Designs 1 and 3 allow us to tell if the message came from the Pale King or White Lady themselves. The common Hallownestian official might only bear the Crest Design while servants in the White Palace bear Designs 1 & 3. Though I bet the Queen’s gardeners only bore the Plumage Design.

With this in mind, let us turn back to Lurien’s Spire to see which crests he bears throughout.

These are all locations through-out the Watcher’s Spire containing different versions of Hallownestian crests. Now please compare these with that of Lurien’s personal Office and Final Resting Place.

Here is the ONLY Place I found the 1st design or Monarch Seal in Lurien’s Office… If you actually can count it since it’s OUTSIDE his office.

The two places where the Monarach Wings appear in Lurien’s Office are in two locations that are OUTSIDE his office. The first is on the Spire’s wall which is just typical City of Tears architecture while the second winged crest is on the elevator.  AKA, a standard design that is easily removed from the room.

What does this mean for Lurien, the fandom’s Pale King fanboy, with nothing of the Pale King inside his office? This is supposed to be Lurien’s personal space where there would be tons of Pale King merch and references. Yet, upon closer examination, not only are there no references to the Pale King, but Lurien went out of his way to hid any references to the White Lady as well! The purple carpet extends all the way down, hiding Design 3 or the White Lady’s crest!

Forget any blacklash from an shocked fandom, the lack of references to the Royal Couple in Lurien’s Office reeks of possible danger for the Watcher. Lurien is the 3rd most powerful bug in Hallownest, right underneath the Pale King and White Lady. Such massive influence needs to be massively watched and carefully checked to ensure that the Watcher doesn’t use that power against the Royal Couple. Yet the Watcher, in his own personal office, does not have any direct reference to either of them.

We do not know how the Royal Couple would feel that Lurien went out of his way to not show any direct alliegance in his private workspace and room. 

Now, I already know what you are thinking. Lurien’s canon dialogue in the Dream Realm. “For King Beloved…to sleep and serve…” It seems as if all of his dialogue is suggesting the exact opposite picture of Lurien’s Office, that he put the Pale King above everything…but the Pale King isn’t the only reason why he became a Dreamer. To quote Lurien’s last journel entry:

“Sleep beckons eternal and these words become my last. Though my gaze shall no longer fall upon this city, I will act forever in its protection. For King, for bug, for Hallownest, I head now to my rest.”

Lurien is a poet. 2)  His actions are for the forever protection of his City. 3) Lurien’s reasons for acting are not solely for the Pale King, but for bug and Hallownest. This is important as it shows Lurien separates Hallownest from the Pale King in his mind.

While Lurien DID say “For King Beloved”, there is nothing of Pale King inside Lurien’s personal Office. It seems like the care Lurien had for the Pale King was like the love Americans have for their flag, unwilling to let the flag touch the ground…but not going so far to have the flag inside their bedrooms…unless the love for the flag goes beyond patriotism to nationalism.

Finally, what does this lack of crests mean for Lurien’s character? I am afraid that I will have to dive into symbolism to explain as a certain Watcher doesn’t have much dialogue.

The lack of Monarch crest on the banners shows how Lurien always put Hallownest first, not the Pale King’s interests.  Lurien could have snuck in one of the bigger banners with the Monarch crests, but chose the smaller banner with Design 2 to hang instead. Symbolically, this shows how Lurien’s heart with the kingdom first.

The lack of the Plumage Crests was brought about by Lurien redoing the floors, turning the red floor to purple carpet. As seen before in previous essays, the color red is associated with the nobles and the majority of the Plumage Crests are seen on the noble’s side of the City. Meanwhile, the color purple is primarily seen in Lurien’s Spire AKA Lurien’s color. Just as purple takes from both red and blue to rise to higher wisdom, inspiration, and humility, so Lurien rises above the roots to see a bird’s eye view of the whole culture of Hallownest, not just the nobles who grow (pun intended) from the White Lady.

The open windows has its own symbolism as Team Cherry could have given Lurien’s Office those magnificent Monarch crest windows. Instead, they chose to not just have no seal, but almost no window. Practically, this means Lurien can easily reposition his telescope anywhere so he can see everywhere in the City. But what about symbolism? The answer is that Lurien can see everything CLEARLY and without basis. He sees what is truly there, not what the Pale King wants him to see or expects him to see. Lurien isn’t even plagued by his own personal weakness or anger that could cause the glass to fog up. He can SEE.

Yes, Monomon. You can stop listing all the things wrong with the City. Lurien already has your list and THEN some. 

Here we are at the end of this section and I cannot believe that CAREPT of all things would reveal how Lurien's loyalty is to Hallownest first, not the Pale King.

If you wish to read more of the Essay, click one of these links below.

Part 1.0: Herrah's Den : Here

Part 2.0: Monomon's Archives: Here

Part 3.0: Lurien's Spire: Here

Part 3.25: Lurien's Spire: Windows and Colors: Here

Part 3.5: Even More of Lurien's Spire. Here

Part 3.7: What is WRONG with Lurien's Spire? (You are here)

Part 3.8: Even, even More of Lurien's Spire: Secret Room: Click here

Part 3.9 Watcher Knight Boss Room! Here

Part 4.0 What We Know We Don't Know About the Dreamers' Houses: Click Here

Link to essay on Ao3: Here

If you have thoughts you wish to share, please feel free to comment or reblog! Especially with the above observation!

"Nice characters are boring" to YOU. I love characters who no matter what, will always have genuine love for humanity in their heart. Characters who dance and laugh and sing with sincerity. Characters who believe in others, and are willing to extend a helping hand to people when no one gave them the same luxury. Characters who have gone through so much but believe, no matter what, that humanity and life is something beautiful and worth protecting

This weird thing happened to me too. It was nice at first because "Ahh! 😃 Someone likes my work!" To "Wait da second? Why is this person commenting on how moving my writing is on my fanfic where I just post pictures? 😵"

Out of all the spammers I got, these bots were the nicest. (Especially after the panderers attempting to snag kids on my PG fanfic. 😡) But I still wish the person wrote a real comment actually praising parts of my work. (Again, praising me for moving writing on the fanfic with only artwork [not a comic], didn't even mention the AU the pictures were for)

Good news, haven't seen the bots in months. If they show up tomorrow, a work is getting put on private.

Any other AO3 writers getting spammed by comments that actually look like real comments but are rather… repetitive? They’re nice, effusive even, but after the second or third one I got suspicious. Not sure what the point of them is. Can’t find any links or anything that would make it a trap. Any ideas?