I Have An Important Exam Tomorrow Which Lasts All The Day. Normally I Would Not Eat At All Today, But

When I am fasting, I wear a bracelet which is locked on place. The key is hidden at home. As long this bracelet is locked, I cannot eat. I wish I had a kind of device (gag?) in my mouth which could be locked preventing eating.

After 48 hours fasting I was so exhausted that I nearly was not able to run, only 6 instead of 10 km. So I decided to eat something. The funny thing is, after intermittent fasting I cannot binge anymore. There is no space in my belly. And that is genius.

Everybody wants something from me. The world is fucking up. I want only run away. I can't. But I can decline this fucking world by declining eating. This really helps. It's not 3d. It's liberation.

My 4n4 rules 🍂

Those are my personnal rules for how i deal with my €d so if it trigger you just block 🖤

No processed food

Always zero sugar

Always low/zero fat

Vegetables and fruit every single day

Of course i never add sugar in my meals

No cheese exept mozzarella

Making my meals and limiting eating outside

Always low proportion

No dessert

No fast fooda

No snack on week-end and school vacation

I allow myself 1 snack on the afternoon only on school week for strenght

1000 cal max

1h sport per day

At least one 24h fast per week (since i live with my bf i can't fast much)

Not eating when my bf is not home

Not eating alone

Green tea every morning

2 liter water per day

10k steps per day

Skipping breakfast on week-end

I allow myself to binge only on my first day of period because it make my pain less painful

Small bite

Never taking the first bite

Never asking for food

Daily checking Tumblr for thinsp0

Thats it ! 🍂

quotes to live by.

starving is a gift, not a punishment.

hunger will always feel better than the sickness and guilt that follow eating.

hunger means it’s working.

to be empty is to be strong.

to be light is to be perfect.

eat to live; do not live to eat.

if you must eat at all, let it be just enough to keep your secret safe.

& nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

So I relapsed after 48 hours fasting. Three slices of bread and an apple. Always similar frustrating

Waking up and feeling dedicated and strong. I will fast the whole weekend, at least until Sunday. The goal is as everyday to purge away all superficial and diminish to pureness. But now I know I am not alone with it.

Recovering from a flu means being able to come back to @n@. And I missed her.

At times it is only sadness. And 3d is even more my friend

World is getting easier. I give the command to somebody and he just commanded me not to eat the next 100 hours. And I will follow that command