I Personally Think That Even More Significant Than Andrew Letting Neil Touch Him, Is Andrew Touching

i personally think that even more significant than andrew letting neil touch him, is andrew touching neil.

we're in neil's pov so we obviously mostly see how andrew interacts with him, but andrew is very straightforward with his boundaries and very touch averse with everyone. most if not all instances of andrew touching other people are done out of violence or necessity, but from the beginning he touches neil voluntarily. bringing him down to his level, pulling him into his space, inspecting him, directing his attention, forcing neil back to himself, and eventually, out of affection and lust.

it's the touch before the first kiss that stands out the most to me though. maybe initially he's mostly scouting neil out for potential problems, but still. a man who trusts almost no one, who keeps everyone even his family at an arms length physically and emotionally, who portrays himself as completely apathetic even while drugged, who claims to want nothing, who has had touch used abusively against him for much of his life, purposefully initiates touching neil.

to me it shows even more his intentions and emotions, and attraction/interest, towards neil because he consistently chooses it himself, when he has chosen almost nothing solely for himself his entire life.

"this is nothing" pshh, right.

makes me heart wrenchingly giggly every time.

More Posts from Toomanybirdss and Others

11 months ago

One of my favourite dumb but funny moments in fantasy/sci-fi books or shows is when everything from the characters, the locations, the houses, to the animals have crazy weird names, like fantasy names that are basically just a bunch of syllables smooshed together, but then one of the main characters or even the main character has the stupidest real life name ever.

My favourite example: the Dune series. All the weirdest names under the sun for everything in that series and then one of the main characters name is Paul. Like why is his name Paul?? (i know there is actual story reasons for it but still) One of the worst white boy names ever imo. His last name is Atreides, and his first name is Paul?? Like we were apparently smart enough up to that point to comprehend all the other weird names but the main character had to be the most recognizable basic name ever. Like come on.

Hilarious and infuriating at the same time.


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8 months ago

You either die a hero (get unfairly cancelled after 1-2 seasons) or live long enough to become the villain (the last season/final is a shit show)

3 weeks ago

love love loved cody "bean" winter in tgr!! i loved seeing more of their personality and perspectives, and seeing their friendships with jeremy and jean and everyone else, and how they add significantly to jean's growth. however, i was a tad sad we didn't get to see more of them with pat and ananya. i know that it's their journey playing out of accepting the possibility of a future with the two of them, which is very interesting and understandable for the timeframe, but i missed seeing the trio interact. i for sure enjoyed the exploration of other side characters this book, but it kinda set aside the floozy grouping from tsc that i loved. hopefully the trio will find their way together next book🤞


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9 months ago

"How do you read so many books??" I am simply trying to avoid reality, what are you doing


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8 months ago

Shipping fictional characters isn’t representative of your moral values. It’s representative of your particular psychic damage and the themes and motifs that haunt you. Hope this helps.

3 weeks ago

I'm not sure if Nora has discussed the answer to this before, but which birthday does Neil use after his identity is made legal? Which one did the fbi put on his new ID and passport and stuff?

I recall that in the extra content Nora responded to an ask related to this saying that the 'crazy' party Dan wanted to do for him did end up happening in March, but in another she also explained how Neil doesn't really like large gatherings or celebrating things like anniversaries. That party doesn't necessarily designate that as the date he chose or that he celebrates at all, maybe just that the team wanted to plan something for him and that was the day that worked best in the timeline of the aftermath of tkm.

I've seen people post a happy birthday thing for him on both January 19th and March 31st, so it seems as a fandom we consider both accurate, but I wonder which one Neil chose... something to ponder.


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6 months ago

I love when trauma makes characters messy. I love when characters don't know how to show love. I love when they lash out. I love when they're vile and break down. I love characters who aren't perfect victims. I love when stories don't excuse behaviour but allow you to understand it

2 weeks ago

i don't think in general it is concerning lol, but given Jean's mentality at the time... it just makes me wonder what he was imagining could be done to skin, his skin, with a peeler, by him or others. and that his instinct is to visualize that possibility by testing it on his finger...

dunno maybe i need to touch grass but it made me shiver reading it.

"Jean tested the edge of the peeler with his finger"

Jean's entire perspective in tsc is hard to get through, but this one line from Jeremy's pov just... *scream*

i'll leave it to your unwilling imagination


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2 weeks ago

"Jean tested the edge of the peeler with his finger"

Jean's entire perspective in tsc is hard to get through, but this one line from Jeremy's pov just... *scream*

i'll leave it to your unwilling imagination


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1 month ago
Me And My Homies Support Real Artists Who Put Their Passion Into Their Pieces Instead Of A Machine Who

me and my homies support real artists who put their passion into their pieces instead of a machine who rips off the hard work of talented peeps


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toomanybirdss - fandomonium fuelled by hyperfixation
fandomonium fuelled by hyperfixation

birdy, she/her. existential crisis in training. :))

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