When U Give Ur Kid IPhone X Instead Of The Barbie Mobile

The way she looked at me my optical sensors automatically registered 01001100 01101111 01110110 01100101 and then we knew we were in love.We then adjusted our local coordinates and we intersected at the coffee bean twisting and squooshing machine. As soon as we met my battery pack registered and huge spike and my robotic vibrational module malfunctioned.I barely had the neurons to vibrate my speakers but I got over it. We produced multiple vibrations of air for a very long time .It seems that we were both programmed in the same language and were only miles apart when our owners were assembling us.

After this she started squishing her wobbly skin pad on her mouth and started touchscreening my left arm. She was definitely into my programs and had already started to wipe out my primary functions.

After that she was putting some liquids in her speakers and making turtle sex noises. My neurons calculated she maybe out of battery and therefore recharging herself with the jiggly water.

After a while we started to rhyme with the jiggly speaker sound. My interconnected joints started making robot sex noises and I was embarrassed. She however thought It was the man wobbling the compact disc. She however fell down and I started to see hydrogen peroxide rolling down her face skin pads. I forwarded my arm and said '01000111 01100101 01110100 00100000 01110101 01110000 00100000 01100110 01100101 01101101 01100001 01101100 01100101 00100000 01100100 01101111 01100111 00100000 ' and then i knew our neurons were matched and we were in chemical castrated attraction of human kind

After a second I wrote this my cat came and touched me and sat beside me . I don't know how much I love this world and myself and the people around me

Can someone just wrap me in an aluminium foil and keep me in the oven and burn me into the fucking void. I really need that shiny death

The last one reminds me of melted ice cream!! I love cats so much!! 😆😻❤️

Parents in 2018 (teaching their child): no don't click that video ,that is a clickbait my son.

Am I the only person who thinks Elizabeth Olsen is sexier than Scarlett Johansson

You never know how much u appreciate sitting unless something happens to ur butt

The only difference between Ellen and Instagram is the number of viewers.

Cats with expressive little faces… reblog if you agree….

Years later people will discover my blog and they will see my posts and exclaim . . . . . . . . . . Shitpost

When I get older with lots of money I want to build a house with the shape of a pineapple and I want to build huge trees which trace out the letter 'c'

And I am going to call myself spongebob