"Taking inventory of the fucks which one gives"
Manager: Has anyone taken inventory yet?
Supervisor: I put 2 whole new hires on it.
Manager: We'll meet quota, right? We need at least 11 fucks to give come next quarter. (Corporate told them 46k)
Supervisor: Well, we're down by two elf percent since last quarter, not counting July.
New Hire #1: I've got the stats on inventory, and...
Supervisor: And what?
New Hire #1.3̅: We're out of fucks to give.
More favourite numerical memes:
Implicit or explicit enumeration of uncountable things (example: taking inventory of the fucks which one gives)
Suggesting the divisibility of things which are not customarily thought of as able to be subdivided (example: "six whole people")
Using words that aren't numbers as numbers (example: "one William dollars")
Technically correct but contextually misleading estimates (example: looking at a group of several thousand things and observing that there are "at least three")
Incongruous qualifiers for apparently simple sums or tallies (example: she was twenty-seven years old, not counting 2014)
Me, except I was also the little boy who liked trains. Still undiagnosed, and a girl now.
happy autism awareness day to all the girls who had “ friends” growing up who were actually bullying them . to the girls who always sat alone in the grass and wondered why nobody wanted to talk . to the girls who spoke to animals like they were listening . to the girls who created a little world in their room . to the girls who always felt ashamed for how deeply they love things and how passionately they enjoyed media . to the girls who covered their ears when they were overwhelmed by everything . to the girls who carrying a special thing around to feel safe . to the girls who never understood what they did wrong to feel so lonely . to the girls who were diagnosed later in life because they weren’t little boys who liked trains. you are so special and beautiful and you’re not worse for it, you love deeply and that is so wonderful please never try to push that down . I LOVE YOU !!!!!
There's gonna be smth special in the eggs this year ganggggggg
i love when easter falls on 420. because not only has he risen but he's baked.
Smeagol
tolkien really messed up in not giving frodo a cat. frodo is such a ‘has a cat sleeping by the fire’ type person. cat to patrol the pantries for mice. she would stay with the gaffer when he went off on the quest. and would purr against his shoulder when he came back. some name like lacey or buttercup. an old cat he got a few years into living alone. she’d sit by the door waiting every day until he got home. hated saruman and hissed every time she saw him. frodo would hold her even more after his return, trying to remember who he was before. frodo deserved a cat
Gothic Hearse “Carthedral” Street legal 1971 Cadillac made by Rebecca Caldwell
Honorable mentions:
- A cliffside at sunset, after being dragged there by the aforementioned lover/best friend/homoerotic comrade.
- In an alleyway just outside the backdoor of a club.
- Underwater, so that all anyone sees is a developing cloud of red that announces your demise.
- A bed with white sheets.
top 3 places to bleed out:
1. the snow
2. your lover/best friend/homoerotic comrade’s arms
3. bathroom floor
Life could be a dream
unbelievable find just now
What the other stores do:
Denethor leaps grotesquely into the air to catch the tomatoes and shove them into his mouth with both hands. Eomer only affirms your statement to get people to stop throwing tomatoes at Denethor.
"boromir taught eomer how to speak the common tongue" I say. I am booed off the stage. the crowd throws tomatoes. suddenly from somewhere in the audience, someone says, "he's right." it's eomer son of eomund, speaking in the same dialect and tone as boromir of gondor
Reblogging to remember what is being lost. It wasn't just the Navajo either. The Cherokee and Comanche peoples, among about 14 other groups served the United States. This is Native American erasure. Remember. Please remember them, along with any other groups this admin tries to erase. They are still here, never forget.
“Were it not for the Navajos, the Marines would never have taken Iwo Jima.”
- 5th Marine Division signal officer Major Howard Connor