I love seeing posts from like a day ago that all say "it's almost time! Homestuck day is almost here!" When in reality
Anyway, happy 4/13 y'all, I'll probs cosplay later
I am a hideous monster
But I am not a basement bitch.
It's time
My grandma: well I can't call you she and u can't call you he so I try to just call you by your name. (Referring to new name not deadname)
Me (ftm trans boi): why can't you call me he?
Grandma: because you don't have the he parts.
My dysphoria: INCOMING!
At least she's half supportive. 🙄😓
Hanging in the woods part 5
What if someone went to hell for being gay but when they got there Satan was just like, "you're not here for sinning or anything, gay people just have to come to hell because there are too many homophobic assholes in heaven and God doesn't like people fighting so you're down here to avoid that. Don't worry my child, there's a room for you over there, I'll take care of you, you can hang out with all the other cool gays whenever you want to, and if you ever get bored you can totally be a demon just ask and I'll do it." The gay person realizes that the devil is actually an ally and that the lord might be a homophobe.
I was hyperfixating on south park again and I just watched the covid specials and post covid stuff. Y'all I'm gonna be stuck on this fandom a long fuckin while.
I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS RIGHT NOW!
Most importantly I'd let Vic rail me anyday.
Do you ever feel like a starving carnivore?
What do you mean?
Well, sometimes, very rarely mind you, but once in a blue moon I get into this mood where I like, feel like I wanna eat organs or some shit. Not a random person though, I'm not Jeffery Dahmer! It's like I wanna eat myself? Like I get a rage and my head gets filled with violent gore and screaming and I wanna tear flesh from bone like I'm a wild animal or a monster or something, but in a weird way at the same time I always wanna be torn apart myself, feel the pain, I desire it. I tend to eat gas station meats when I feel like that, viciously rip it with my teeth, sometimes I get cheetos or takis too and it's like I'm breaking through bones, and in a weird way, I'm not me anymore. I'm a monster tearing myself apart. I'm a ravenous creature feasting on fresh meat and chewing through bones and drinking in the viscous blood. I'm me and I'm the monster I run from, I'm the monster and the meat.
When it ends it helps, I feel better, I'm not mad anymore, the monster is fed and it can go back to it's cage for a long time before it inevitably begins to starve again.
I don't know how to get rid of the monster that desires so desperately sometimes to eat me and begs for a visceral mess of carnage. I don't think I could deny it forever no matter how hard I tried. I can delay it, I don't open that cage until I am home, but the monster won't let me rest if I don't feed it eventually, fake meat, fake blood, fake bones, for the imaginary monster. I don't know how to get rid of the desire to be torn apart by it.
Like I said, it doesn't happen often, and I never hurt anyone in reality, I don't even hurt anyone in my head, the monster eats me, I am the monster, I only eat myself. I don't know what that means though.
The best way I can describe it is feeling like a starving carnivore.
I want to hug this man
And feel the stick and be stuck there.
Nonbinary, Pansexual They/Them I am made of sewer rats https://linktr.ee/tastysodapop
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