[rough Draft] Sympathy, Empathy, Compassion And Altruism

[rough draft] Sympathy, Empathy, Compassion and Altruism

relatability 

the quality of being easy to understand or feel sympathy for

- from your own perspective

sympathy 

- removed from the experience another person has: 

 - currently not having the “same” experience as another person currently has or never having experienced something similar as the other person

 - always from your own perspective; doesn’t require imagination; ignorant of, or purposely distancing yourself from another person’s perspective

 -> suppressing the other person’s feelings (usually internally pushing their feelings aside) and at times also your own 

 -> can include overlooking subtle signs and only taking surface meanings

 -> act of commiseration - acknowledgment that you can not possibly feel the same way or truly share another’s grief, but that you can understand it (which may or may not be true) / feeling or expressing that you know what the other person is experiencing regardless whether you actually do (as in: no direct knowledge of how the other person actually feels)

 -> a lot of judgment; can lead to giving unasked advice

 -> often without actionable advice or additional input that may diminish the sufferer’s state of mind 

1. (a feeling or expression of) understanding and care, as well as maybe feeling sorry for another person who is suffering or has problems that have caused unhappiness (trouble, grief, misfortune, etc.)

2. (a feeling or expression of) agreement; inclination to think or feel alike: emotional or intellectual accord

3. (a feeling or expression of) support; feeling of loyalty: tendency to favor    

4. an affinity, association, or relationship between persons or things wherein whatever affects one similarly affects the other [includes 2. and 3.]

compassion 

awareness of and caring about another person’s distress together with a desire to alleviate it (/ to help them)  

three to five key elements of compassion:

Recognizing another’s suffering

Understanding that other people suffer

(Having feelings for another’s suffering)

(Dealing with uncomfortable feelings)

Feeling compelled to act or alleviate the suffering

- can be sympathetic or empathetic

empathy

- removed from the experience another person has:

 - currently not having the “same” experience as the other person currently has or never having experienced something similar as the other person

 - always at least partially from another person’s perspective; requires imagination

  -> acknowledging both your own and another person’s emotions

  -> can include being sensitive to all kinds of non-verbal cues

  -> (at least partial) sharing in what another person is experiencing

  -> no judgment; just listening to another person

  -> possibly actionable advice or additional input that may diminish the sufferer’s state of mind

general definition: understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another person of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner

1. cognitive empathy: knowing how another person feels and what they might be thinking; also called perspective-taking

- concerned with: thought, understanding, intellect

- benefits: understanding diverse viewpoints, motivating other people, helps in negotiations

- pitfalls: can be disconnected from or ignore deep emotions; doesn’t put you in another person’s shoes in a felt sense

2. affective / emotional empathy: feeling physically along with another person, as though their emotions were contagious

- concerned with: feelings, physical sensation, mirror neurons in the brain

- benefits: first response with children and for our loved ones, close interpersonal relationships

- can be overwhelming or inappropriate in many circumstances

3. compassionate empathy: taking the “middle ground” between cognitive empathy and emotional empathy, and using emotional intelligence to effectively respond to the situation with loving detachment

-> taking the “middle ground” between cognitive empathy and emotional empathy thanks to the connection between thoughts and feelings:

 - considering both the felt senses and intellectual situation of another person without losing your center

-> balancing mindfulness with compassionate caring

- concerned with: intellect, emotion, action

- benefits: considers the whole person

- pitfalls: ? (maybe that it takes time and energy: both developing the necessary components and balancing act, as well as the actual act of compassionate empathy)

Important: 

Having low empathy doesn’t make anyone a bad person. This might be the case when there’s a severe lack of emotional empathy, which is true for psychopaths. However, they can still act kind, act responsible, etc.. So even that is disputable. Cognitive empathy is helpful in order to better understand someone, but if you can truly listen to them, then it isn’t the end of the world if your cognitive empathy isn’t that much developed though I recommend to work on it. Better understanding always helps.

Both sympathy and empathy are important in their own ways depending on situations. However, in the end it’s compassion that makes the difference.

altruism

unselfish regard for, or devotion to the welfare of others:

- the attitude of caring about others and doing acts that help them although you do not get anything by doing those acts

- willingness to do things that bring advantages to others, even if it results in disadvantage for yourself