Tartaglia But With A Gun ✨

Hello, I hope you're doing great! ^^ Could I request a Kaeya x male Reader, where the reader is a thief and Kaeya cathes him and teaches him a lesson (nsfw)

A/n: I live for this shit. This is...kind of kinky so.. & I wrote this at 4am. Listening to: Throat babyyyyyy

Mentions: Blowjobs, Denial, Teasing... blowjobs.

Warnings: Nsfw Face fucking at its finest, A very dominant Kaeya.

The King of Thieves

Kaeya left Angel’s Share for the night. Dark cheeks tinted a dusty deep red from a night of indulgence. Diluc was there, tending the bar coincidentally.

“There have been a plethora of incidents revolving around thieves as of late. I suggest you be mindful when leaving for the night Kaeya.”

His younger brother’s light warning drifted back into the depths of his mind as he strolled the nearly vacant streets of Monstadt’s city. Of course, on his way back to headquarters; the Knight took the long way around. Cutting through a specific alleyway that lead to a patch of grassy plains above a stone stair case. Out the corner of his eye he saw a shadow zip by and over the short roof top of someone’s home. As he moved to take a precautionary step backwards the shadow figure landed behind him. Assuming Kaeya was drunk enough to one up, the figure moved in to grab Kaeya’s shoulder in efforts to flip him onto his back and steal his vision. Kaeya, in a rebuttal too quick for this thief’s skill set. Side stepped and ducked, only to elbow his assailant in the chest cavity and then reappear behind them with his sword drawn.

“Why is Diluc always right?” Kaeya sighed, a frown on his face as he stared at the person in front of him, whom he had knocked the wind right out of. He wasn’t sure who the person was, given they were covered from head fo toe in all black. When Kaeya saw that they were recovering he twirled his sword, knocking them unconscious with the hilt of his blade. When the thief dropped, Kaeya looked down at them. He moved to uncover their face and saw a young man. He saw, you? His eye went wide, you were not much older than Diluc. The young Knight couldn’t help but think it was a shame to see such wasted potential resort to something of a scoundrel at best. He threw your arm over his shoulder, picking you up with a deep exhale. Effortlessly carrying you off back to one of the empty confinement cells within the knights headquarters. The one he picked out had been out of use for quite some time, given Klee had blown it up rendering the cell unlivable (for her). — It was a perfect place for a thief, especially one that tried to steal his vision.

Kaeya sat on the edge of a small table in the corner of the room, arms crossed and a light frown on his face. He waited until you had come through and regained consciousness. In a panic, your dark eyes darted across the room. Something Kaeya found quite amusing.

“Where..am I?” You huffed out, there was a draft in the room and you visibly shivered. Kaeya stayed seated looking at you.

“In the Knights of Favonius’ HQ, a confinement cell to be more precise.” He replied nonchalantly and as you tried to move, chains rattled against your wrists and ankles.

“Let me out of here, else you’ll be sorry—“

You were cut off by Kaeya’s abrupt laugh, it made you frown and your brow crease. “What’s so fuckin’ funny?” Kaeya’s chuckle faded into a sigh, his finger tapping idly on the bicep of his crossed arms.

“Nothing, it’s just you are in no position to talk. In fact, I bet if I did away with you right here I could get away with it.” His smile may have been playful but his eye hinted at something much darker.

“You.. can’t do that, you’re an honor bound knight it would be a disgrace—“ Kaeya smiled, this time it wasn’t playful but it still held amusement.

“Relax I’m not a barbarian. Why don’t you tell me why you tried to rob me in the middle of an alleyway and most interestingly... try to take my vision.” After Kaeya stated his questions there was a stagnant silence that sat in the stale air of the confinement cell. Kaeya looked down at you, who shifted uncomfortably. “Oh? No answer? Are you sure that’s what you wish to do?” Your eyes drifted over to look up at Kaeya. Who moved from his spot on the table to walk towards you. In the dim light of the cell his features illuminated, it may have been the full moon that peeked through the barred window that made him look so appealing. The sound of his boots tapping down on the stone floors of the cell sent a slight chill down your spine. He towered over you as you sat on the floor. A light smirk threatened the corner of his lips, as he stared down at you with a quizzical eye. The air around him was cool and it seemed to get even colder as he knelt down to eye level. “I think I’ll give you until the count of say- three.” He held up three fingers before putting them down.

“What?”

“One.” He moved his hand behind your head almost as if he was cradling you. Unbeknownst to you his sword appeared in his palm. Your side profile reflected off the blade as it drew near your head. “Two.” His voice was deep and melodic and his tone evermore serious as he counted down. He wasn’t smiling anymore, seeing him this serious started giving you second thoughts about keeping your mouth shut. He was so close you could smell him, eye half lidded as he stared down at you and a crease in his brow. Against the back of your neck your hair brushed against the blade that dangerously kissed the skin of the nape of your neck. He leaned in and as he drew near, a light grin forming at his lips. Was he enjoying the reaction he was getting out of you? Or the interrogation process? Your hand pressed against his chest to try and move him back you couldn’t stand to have him that close. He paused for a split second, his eye dropping down to your hand, it was warm. “Thre-“

“Wait!” You say, your dark eyes shifting up to peer into his. Staring at him this closely, being able to smell him. It was hard not to think about the things you wanted him to do to you while sitting helpless on the cell floor. He was ridiculously attractive and equally as intimidating when he wished to be.

“Hm? Did you change your mind?” He asked, flashing a cold smile. Your cheeks flushed, he smelled like the first snow fall of winter, shamelessly it made blood rush to where you didn’t need it to. His eyes drifted down briefly before he looked at you more closely. “Or maybe you didn’t?” He purred lightly and a smile crossed his face again.

“I-I..I was just.. curious as to what it’s like to have a vision I don’t have one.” You spoke out, Kaeya didn’t sense a lie from you. Even as you continued to try and make him feel sorry for you. “I haven’t been blessed by the Archons. I’m poor and I...I can’t do much of anything let alone use a vision. Being a thief is all I’ve ever known. The only way I know to survive. I wasn’t going to hurt you.” His brow creased as you babbled that last part, you caught yourself and spoke sheepishly. “Not..that I could’ve anyway—“ Kaeya laughed again, he moved back but not very far. His sword disappeared in one swift movement and he took a minute to look at you. Your hands moved over to your lap, you didn’t think he noticed.

“What am I going to do with you hm?” He pondered aloud as he stood up, a hand resting on his hip. He stared down at you, “You assaulted me in an alleyway, tried to rob me and now..” You couldn’t help but think it wasn’t much of an assault, you were the one who got hit square in the chest and knocked unconscious after all.

“Kaeya-“

“And you know who I am? You’re quite the bold thief. Tell me if I let you go, how do I know you won’t do it again?” You shifted uncomfortably, nothing he was saying was arousing but, truthfully you fell victim to his charm the moment he began questioning you, not to mention the count down and intimidation attempt. Kaeya noticed, he was quite observant but he was doing his job- for the most part.

“I won’t.” You lied, he saw right through it. Kaeya crossed his arms again, if he felt any remorse for you before it was gone now. You avoided eye contact with him even as he stared down at you.

“Do you like being chained up in a cell, you’re excited.” He asked genuinely, his voice was soft and curious. It made you twitch uncomfortably. You shook your head and Kaeya tilted his. “Really? Your as hard as this stone floor, I wasn’t going to tease you about it but it only...fed into every words I’ve said to you thus far.” You could hear him smile, you made the mistake of looking up at him. He was gorgeous and the blush that crossed your face made his smile widen.

“I..can’t help how you’re making me feel. You’re just-“

“I’m just what?” He cut you off, moving his hand to rest on the top of your head. He gently ran his fingers through your hair with his gloved palm. Idly moving his hand down to the back of your head before gripping the ends of your hair between his fingers. “Were you going to say charming? Sexy, hot?” He asked, his grip on your hair wasn’t that tight or painful it aroused a light whimper to fall from your lips. Kaeya noticed your hand palming your growing erection — your pants were growing tighter you couldn’t help it. With his boot he kicked your hand away and stepped on the back of your hand, causing the restraints he had you in to rattle against the stone floor. “You did something bad why should you gain pleasure after committing a crime? As I see it I’m the victim here. You assaulted me in an alleyway.” His grin was wide and with his free hand he moved to unzip his pants. Immediately your mouth began to water as he slipped his hand inside to touch himself right before your very eyes.

“I-I won’t do it again..” You lied once again and he saw through it yet again. His grin only widened, he was going to enjoy this.

“I don’t believe you, therefore...” His grip tightened in your hair and he pulled your head back. “I think I’ll teach you a lesson you won’t soon forget.” The weight he had on your hand increased when he saw you try to move your other hand to slip inside your own pants, it was a warning not to try and relieve yourself. You moved your hand away with a whine as Kaeya freed himself from the tight confines of his trousers. His thick member prodded against your cheek before he let it rest on your lips. He let out a light and playful hum as he stared down at you, almost as if he was beckoning you to open your mouth.

“Kaeya I-“ As soon as you opened your mouth he pushed himself inside, the taste of his pre made you shudder and your eyes flutter. He held your hair and head firmly in place as he thrusted deeper into your mouth. He was genuinely surprised that you were able to take him all the way to the back of your throat.

“It’s not polite to speak with your mouth full.” He teased. “Go on, keep stuffing your face thief.” As you struggled to swallow his cock, you couldn’t stop your hand from reaching down to palm the hard tent in your pants. Kaeya caught wind of your actions and knocked your forearm to the side with his other boot. The deep groan you let out reverberated against his shaft, Kaeya had to bite back his own moan as he pulled your hair again which inevitably moved your head back so your lips wrapped around his tip. “If you do it again you’ll regret it.” He wasn’t smiling when he spoke, it was a threat you weren’t going to see through to the end. Kaeya chuckled lightly and moved his free hand down to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing sweetly against your cheekbone. “You’re so obedient...”

He mumbled, his touch was gentle as he moved his hands up to tangle in your hair. It was almost too gentle and had you questioning his motives. You made eye contact with him and a sly grin spread across his face like wildfire. Without warning his grip tightened to hold your head in place. He slammed hips against your face, bottoming out completely in the back of your tight throat. He groaned out quietly and under his breath, as the ridges of your throat and mouth constricted against his thick shaft. Your soft lips tickled the underside of the base of his cock. His pants sagged and his balls pressed against the stubble of your chin, which only edged him on and reflexively urged his hips to thrust against your face. He exhaled with a light chuckle that sifted through the quiet air of the confinement cell.

You whimpered, drooling all over his cock as you squeezed your eyes shut, it took everything in you not to milk and pump your shaft. Your balls were heavy and full and you ached for a release that you didn’t think you’d get. Kaeya looked down on you to subconsciously check to see if you were okay and to see the sight of his dick disappearing down your throat. He pulled back by a few centimeters and you successfully breathed in through your nose. The taste of his pre on your tongue reminded you of a fermented apple wine. None too surprising to say the least and all the more enjoyable.

Kaeya rutted into your mouth again, you choked and he chuckled. He felt your tongue swirl around his shaft against a prominent vein that curved up from the base of his cock. Your leg twitched in need as he moved, beginning a rough and steady rhythm. He noticed the bulge in your throat, it only made him move faster. Kaeya let out deep exhale and a light moan that was simply music to your ears. His head tilted back as you took him, he glanced down at you for a moment and his lips curled into a smile seeing you hard at work.

“If your mouth is this tight, I wonder how your ass must feel.” He teased you, moving one hand down to wipe away that inevitable tears that formed in your eyes. His other hand loosened in your hair but still rested in place idly. He pulled back completely, giving you a chance to breathe. As you caught your breath Kaeya looked down at you, the blush that stained your cheeks inflated his ego a bit. He arched a brow, waiting for you to keep going.

You gave into that cute, suggestive stare and moved your hand up to stroke him; something you wanted to do for yourself since he started fucking talking. You dragged your tongue along the thick length of his member before taking him into your mouth. What you didn’t choke down, you pumped with your hand. Kaeya finally let out a proper moan it was deep and breathy, he started throbbing in your mouth and palm; biting down on his lower lip in ecstasy. In the midst of milking him dry he took hold of your hair again, only to push himself right back down your throat, he needed that tight fit to finish him off. You were going to swallow it all, not that you minded; he was as inebriating as Everclear. As he filled your throat and mouth, he pulled back his warm cum dripping down your chin. He watched you reach up to wipe it away and lick the back of your hand.

His eye drifted down to your continually throbbing erection, he noticed a dark spot where your own pre had ruined your trousers. He stepped back and moved his hand away from your hair, shifting as he pulled his pants up only to zip them up. Your expression was absolutely priceless in his eyes. You opened your mouth to speak to find that your jaw was already sore from his earlier actions. Kaeya moved to sit on the edge of the table again with a light smile on his face.

“What?” He says like he didn’t just pump his seed down your throat. He made an ‘O’ with his mouth as he looked at your disheveled and needy appearance as if he had forgotten. He didn’t. He moved to toss you a key to the restraints you were in. “You’re free to go and...do something about that.” He smiled with a teasing glint in his eye, you looked at the key in front of you. Picking it up with a frown on your face as your freed yourself. “I told you I’d teach you lesson you wouldn’t forget.” He chuckled moving to cross his arms over his chest. You looked at him and he smirked.

“Asshole.” You mumbled, moving to stand up, Kaeya looked your way not feeling remorseful in the slightest.

“You do realize you tried to assault me and steal my vision. I think I let you off rather easy if you ask me. Going straight to Jean just didn’t feel right.” He quipped, and stood to walk over to the door opening it up for you to go. “I don’t want to see you here again, I’d rather the Cat’s Tail or Angel share preferably. Maybe then you’d get a proper..reward and the aftercare I so graciously give to those who listen.” He said, completely insinuating he wanted to see you again under the right circumstances. With a pout you exited the cell, there wasn’t really much you could say to that. You were indeed happy you didn’t have to spend the night in a dingy unlivable cell. Kaeya leaned against the doorway and crossed his arms. “Till we meet again King of Thieves.”

Bonus

A week went by, you were at Sara’s sitting down to a late night meal before heading off to Springvale for a few days to visit family. You poked at the fisherman’s toast you ordered, thinking about the Knight who left you thoroughly frustrated. You wanted to beat his ass in all honesty but, apart of you just wanted to—

“Well if it isn’t The King of Thieves.”

IT'S OUR LITTLE MEOW MEOW'S SPECIAL DAY, EVERYBODY!!!!

HOW THE MORTALS DO

— CHARACTERS :: Xiao x Adeptus!Reader.

— SUMMARY :: You have always been fascinated by the mortals and their traditions, and Xiao can't help but take notice of this. So, he surprises you with a typical human tradition when they like someone.

— WARNING :: None.

You sat perched on a roof top, watching with the utmost interest as a young woman recieves a flower from a handsome man. She takes the flower in her fingers, a smile gracing her lips as she looks up to meet the mans eyes. He says something you're unable to hear, but whatever it was made the woman smile even wider before throwing her arms around his neck and kissing the man. "Oh!" You look the other way, up at the stars before glancing back and seeing their hands now linked together and walking away. "Hmm... Mortals are so fascinating." You stand up, stretching out your limbs before deciding to return to Xiao, who's likely waiting at the Wangshu Inn for you.

"Were you waiting long?" You call out, stepping next to your fellow adeptus.

"No." Xiao's eyes don't leave the horizon. "...Where were you?"

"At Liyue Harbor," You tell him, "Watching the mortals! I witnessed something so intriguing! A man gave this pretty woman a flower," you glance at him, trying to watch his face for any reaction but it remained neutral. "And then they kissed!" His nose crinkled in disgust.

"Why?"

"Why did they kiss?" He nods and you hum, leaning against the wooden railing. "I think... Because they love each other." You weren't looking, but his eyes widened a fraction. Love. That was something that had been on his mind for quite sometime now. He swallowed down the want to ask for more- what is love? why was he so fascinated with it suddenly? was it the warm feeling he got in his chest when he saw you?

"I don't understand your fascination with them." He says quietly, eyes falling to the scenery below. "Don't you ever get bored of their interactions?"

"You just don't see it the way I do." You pout, looking over at him. "I wish you could see them through my eyes, then you'd see how captivating they are! I wish I could recieve a flower from someone who loves me..." You grumble, looking back at the horizon, the moment from earlier filling your mind.

"Mmm..." He looks over at you, thinking for a moment before deciding to leave for the night. "Let's meet tomorrow. Here, same time."

"Wait-" Before you got the chance to ask why he was suddenly leaving, Xiao disappeared. You sigh, grumbling about how he always seems to leave a little too early for your liking.

But, just as he asked, you returned to the inn the following night. Returning to the top balcony of the Wangshu Inn earlier than normal, you found he wasn't there. "Hm, he's always here before me..." You wait a while longer, not recognizing his presence until he spoke up.

"Y/n?" You jump at his voice, turning to face him- You go to scold him only to stop and stare at him with wide eyes. Although trying to act nonchalant as he holds out the Qingxin flowers, Xiao's heart is pounding against his ribcage. "These are for you." Your eyes swirl with adoration as you take the flowers from his hands, your fingers sparking with electricity as they graze his fingertips. You giggle, smelling them like you've seen the mortals do.

"Xiao! Thank you!" You smile brightly, looking up at him to see his ears and cheeks are tinted red. You hum, taking a step forward and cupping his cheek gently before pressing a kiss to the other one. You take a step back and you can almost see the steam that radiates off of him.

"I-It was nothing," he looks the other way, unable to meet your gaze. "Yesterday you said you wanted flowers, and I just happened to see them."

"Is that so?" You pluck one of the flowers off of the stem and then placing it behind his ear. "Oh wow," You whisper, "You're so pretty, Xiao!" Maybe you wanted to give your fellow adeptus a heart attack or maybe you were entirely oblivious to how he was affected by your actions, but either way, Xiao was trying his hardest to act unaffected.

"You..." He huffs, plucking the flower from behind his ear and tucking it behind yours. He softens a bit, "It looks better on you." Your pretty sure your cheeks are on fire after that, and now its your turn to look the other way. You clear your throat, wondering if you should say what was on your mind or not but before you could Xiao spoke. "These mortal customs aren't... aren't terrible."

And you couldn't deny that you agreed. Instead you leaned forward, and with a coy smile you say, "Shall I teach you some more then?”

content belongs to @/paiimons

he's an irredeemable villain TO YOU. I understand him though

That’s how you talk to the 🎀𝓑𝓻𝓸𝓼🎀

girl help i’m having creation ideas above my skill level

childe rlly said birthday seggs pls😍☺️🤲

riding a war criminal for his birthday🙄‼️‼️

no brain left for wornds only horny

gorilla grip anon with much horny😍🥰😌☺️😩🍾‼️‼️🤧🎊🙄🤧🥳🎊🎉🥳

gorilla grip anon my beloved!!!

thanks for the idea gonna try it out with childe later while streaming!! i already got the thumbnail ready

but "war criminal",,,. you got me thinking about childe with a gun . so hot .

cw gun play

i rly can't stop thinking about childe with a gun now that it/s in my mind. i will treasure this thought . 4ever!, ur so hot for giving me this idea gorilla grip<333

he'll trace your the sides of your face with a gun and then press the muzzle against your lips to make you suck on it and like

he'll tell you the safety isn't on and u obviously get a lil freaked out </333

he'll stick the barrel down your throat until you gag on it and you start tearing up yeah</3 it would get childe SO hard. the fact that he's holding a loaded gun down your throat; jus t the amount of power he has over you in that moment<333 so sexy of him<33

i can't help but imagine him saying "such a little slut, my little slut," like!!!! yeah. and then he'll leave a wet trail as he drag the gun down to the middle of your neck and presses on the delicate skin there before dragging it down your stomach to the inside of your thigh and finally to your clit <3

he'll rub on it a lil until he knows you're wet enough and then he'll ease the barrel into your cunt; it stretches you out so so good and you feel almost guilty for loving it </33 he thrusts it in n out of you, the thumb of his free hand playing with your clit, and it hits your g-spot every time. you're short-circuiting and seeing stars when you cum all over the gun and his hand <3333 yeah !11!!@! so hot<3 at least childe thinks so:'D

he'll pull the gun out from you and suck on the barrel to clean it of your juices yeah!!@$*@&(#$!@$#@!!!111!!

"tastes so sweet, smells like fear... so good." HDFJDKSFNSJKALFJAS he absolutely would say something like that no one can tell me otherwise<22223##33

n e wayz yeah

im sorry for this i think i rly need to go touch some grass

hawks: be gay, stop crimes. school can come later

pushing my catboy xiao agenda

Diluc on a horse 🏇