Gyns do you have any suggestions for stuff to help work through anger? I recently had a close female friend that I thought supported me suddenly turn around and spew a ton of alt right propaganda. Apparently she’s gone down a tradwife pipeline and now believes that women having rights is apparently the root of all problems in the world, and she told me (a lesbian who she also knows has experienced multiple counts of sexual assault) that she believes that all women must find a man to submit to sexually.
And while I’m grateful for the fact I can now feel anger instead of shame, I’ve gone a long way in healing, I’d also like to be able to step away from it because I’m legitimately losing sleep over it and it’s dredged up a lot of flashbacks. I’m not trying to fish for sympathy, I just want to know if y’all have any suggestions for me.
“You just hate sex workers” but I’m advocating to stop the abuse and violence they go through daily
“You just hate sex workers” but I’m advocating for them not to be subjected to sexual illness or infections on the daily
“You just hate sex workers” but I’m advocating to stop them being trafficked and forced into the industry
“You just hate sex workers” but I’m advocating for them to be given higher wages to help them out of the industry
“You just hate sex workers” but I’m advocating to just have them treated as human beings
This whole idea from Conservatives/the right in general that men are “leaders” is completely a farce even in their own groups, and I can speak to this firsthand because I grew up in it. Super Catholic, church services were all in Latin, women weren’t allowed to wear pants or cut their hair shorter than their shoulders, and they were sporting all of America’s current insane political views a decade before they became more popular. And men still did jack all.
I was running the church choir in all but name by the age of 14, despite the choir director being a man in his 20s. Women handled all the childcare and child rearing, women were the ones who organized everything. Who put up the decorations for each season. Who provided the food. Who kept the church clean and in repair. Who taught the children during Sunday School. They were the ones who made decisions for their families, the ones who kept tabs on everything, the ones who organized playdates and homeschool meetups and church potlucks. Women built everything and men only placed their stamp of approval on it to claim the work.
And I wish more people would WAKE UP to this realization. Being a leader means nothing if you aren’t actually working. Simply sitting on your ass and giving the occasional instruction is not true leadership, nor is it even the servant leadership Christ himself advocated for. Those men were completely useless in the grand scheme of things and we would have continued on without them with relative ease. They hold onto relevancy by forcing women to depend on them financially but that’s all they have to stand on. And it just pisses me off idk this is just a rant
Men really are brain damaged they'll be like women have the PRIVILEGE of not being the sex that rapes people all the time :(. Everybody is scared of me or looks at me like a creep :( it's so hard women are so lucky to just be the rape victim class of people : *((. And expect us to feel bad for them
call us ugly to sell us shit!
I’m not sure if I’m intersex (lack funds for medical testing at this time) but I have a similar problem as is outlined here that I only discovered as an adult, and it was IMMEDIATELY turned into a problem surrounding men. My health or comfort? Painful periods? Hypothetical medical complications later in life? My OWN personal comfort during sex? They acted like I was stupid to even ask.
All I’ve been given so far is be told to use those stupid plastic dilators so I can be forced open enough to be fucked by a man. Doesn’t matter how much it hurt me, or felt unnatural, or if that was even my goal in asking for medical advice (fun fact, it wasn’t. I was trying to get help for my own personal bodily comfort outside of sex). I’m incredibly thankful that soon after that nonsense I was able to unlearn comphet and realize I was a lesbian and leave all that male-centric crap and plastic phalluses behind. It was traumatic enough for me as an adult and I cannot fucking stand the idea of people doing that shit to children. Absolutely disgusting behavior.
“Female-assigned intersex kids’ vaginal canal size is also assessed by doctors, to ensure that it’s long enough to fit a penis inside of it. Doctors might surgically construct or re-construct vaginas, which can result in a host of health problems and necessitate multiple, multiple surgeries. This is especially the case since most intersex kids have these surgeries very young, and when their bodies grow into their adult forms, more surgeries are necessary to keep their vagina size in proportion. Non-surgical methods are also used to increase or maintain vaginal length by regularly using medical dildos to stretch the vagina over months and years. (It’s kind of like braces for your vagina, but much, much worse.) Just like there are no standards for how long a clitoris “can” be before it’s classified as a penis, there aren’t absolute standards as to how long a vagina is for it to be of “normal” length. I had a dilation procedure performed for almost every exam I had with intersex doctors from the time I was 8 until I was 16, so that they could check how long my vagina was as I grew. I absolutely hated these procedures. I mean, imagine a man as old as your father or your grandfather, who you don’t know, inserting a medical dildo into you each time you saw him, knowing that you can’t question the doctor’s orders and just accept that you have to undergo these uncomfortable procedures for your health. Imagine a decade or so later, realizing that these procedures did nothing to track your health, and had everything to do with grown men feeling good about the fact that you could fuck some dude someday like a “normal girl”. That all those traumatizing procedures weren’t actually medically relevant at all, and it actually was within my right to refuse those examinations. I didn’t know any of that at the time. I also had no idea that I wouldn’t want to ultimately have the kind of sex they assumed I’d be having, adding yet another layer of this-was-totally-unnecessary/messed-up to my history. Other kids shouldn’t have to go through this. Other adults shouldn’t have revelations some day far into the future that what was happening to them WASN’T okay, and their traumatic feelings ARE valid, and the whole system of how intersex people are conceptualized and “treated” IS entirely fucked. And it’s gotta change. We’ve gotta change it.”
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—-Claudia at Autostraddle
I just read this article and was reminded once again how invisible the intersex community often is… we need to signal boost this shit to let people know that this kind of “medical treatment” is NOT okay.
(via bossybussy)
Felt straight-up ill reading this. This is the institutionalized rape of children. It’s beyond unconscionable that procedures like this are normalized and considered “treatment”.
(via thaxted)
jfc
(via stammsternenstaub)
Revolting and repugnant.
See why intersex folk don’t like their medical issues being used as a rhetorical gotcha?
(via appropriately-inappropriate)
It would be quite silly indeed to get too hung up on potential power imbalance between Caitlyn & Vi when the show has a solid 7-10 minute supercut's worth of Caitlyn spluttering her little token protests before immediately doing exactly whatever Vi just told her to do.
Why is everyone obsessed with calling sapphic relationships in media toxic? People act like they haven’t seen a slow burn enemies-to-lovers done properly before. Meanwhile, straight couples get to break up twice an episode and scream that they hate each other before a heart-wrenching love confession and everyone eats it up. Booktok has got everybody and their mom drooling over heinous serial criminals disguised as anti-heroes who kidnap their victim and traumatize her into submission. Be ffr.
20 | Butch lesbian | Feminist | diy enthusiast | Joculatrix | Lovergirl (Ik that contradicts being angry but trust me I have room for love and hatred)
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