I Love & Hate How I Get So Invested In A Series Because I’ll Binge It Uncontrollably Because I WANT

yearning is such a beautiful thing. what i love about yearning and slowburn is that while the romance progresses, you can get to know the characters better, which makes the audience see how deep the bond in the relationship is. all the small moments have meaning. every interaction, every thought, and every glance means something and is a way to emphasize how much love (platonic or romantic) the characters have for one another. there is something so beautiful about yearning because it's so human to want something so badly, but you have a part of you that is afraid you'll never get it. romantic or not, i love watching/reading characters find their person and learning all about each other, becoming so close and connected that it's hard to imagine life without the other. yearning to know more, yearning to be closer. it's so beautiful to me!

skip and loafer episode 12

Skip and Loafer is one of my favorite mangas. It's a beautiful story about high schoolers growing up and their relationships with one another. I had been wanting to reread the manga for a while, but I realized I had never actually watched the anime! So, I finally decided to watch it, and I was blown away.

Episode 12 was a perfect season finale, and the entire season blew me away. From the beginning, we watched as Mitsumi adjusted to life in the city by making new friends and joining the student council.

One of her best friendships is with Shima Sousuke, a popular, handsome boy. What I love about episode 12 is that we see Shima's character arc hit its climax. Throughout the show, he is a laid-back guy. However, his internal conflict has to do with his constant need to perform for validation.

While Mitsumi is sure of her future, Shima doesn't have a clue what he wants to do because he has always done what others have asked of him. Of all the people in his life, Mitsumi is one of the few who knows about Shima's child-acting phase. She's pretty perceptive when it comes to Shima. Even when many others can't tell Shima is having a difficult time, she can see through his facade.

This scene may look silly initially, but it's Mitsumi's attempt at protecting Shima.

Ririka, Shima's childhood actress friend, went through a rough patch that she blames on Shima. Since Shima believes he is at fault, he is always at her beck and call despite feeling uncomfortable. At this point in the episode, Mitsumi realizes Ririka purposefully sent Shima's mom away. Despite Mitsumi having some moments where she can't read a room, in this instance, Mitsumi knows that ririka means trouble.

The only way Mitsumi can think of warding off Ririka is to strike a pose similar to that of an anteater. It's silly, but it's a testament to Mitsumi's character. She isn't afraid to look weird if it means she can help someone. Throughout the season, Mitsumi was always making little messes, such as throwing up during the assembly and getting called the "big boss" of the school. Despite these awkward moments, Mitsumi doesn't let this get her down; she gets back up and keeps moving forward.

Shima is aware of Mitsumi's resilience. Unlike himself, Mitsumi isn't afraid of messing up. Shima finds himself drawn to her. Out of all the people he's met, Mitsumi is the one that he finds himself reaching out to.

During the season finale, Shima has a monologue that is one of my favorite moments in the entire manga. It's a testament to his character and the foundation of his future development.

Shima's constant need to perform has forced him to believe his OWN ideas and feelings don't matter

Since childhood, he has thought acting would be a way to make his mother happy. Although he hasn't worked since childhood, he has held onto that mentality his whole life. If he gives people what they want, they'll be happy, even if it costs Shima happiness.

Shima is tough on himself despite his "laidback" appearance. He believes his words and actions have no meaning and that he has no purpose if he isn't "performing" for someone else. He even calls Mitsumi and Kanechika "dazzling" and says that they're so far away from him. He doesn't see himself as someone who can fearlessly do what they want.

Although Shima clearly admires Mitsumi, it isn't until his big performance that he realizes what many of his feelings boil down to.

"I know this feeling. It's envy."

During his performance, he engages in an inner dialogue that circles around the idea that Shima doesn't know himself. Did he want his mom there to watch him perform? Does he want to keep acting? Was he glad she didn't stay? Is his lack of confidence the reason he is uncomfortable around girls? "Does it mean I can act if it's for myself?"

At the end of the day, Shima does not know who he is or what he wants. Unlike Mitsumi and Kanechika, who go 100% into everything they do and are genuinely happy about their choices, Shima has no clue what he finds joy in.

"You'll never be one of them."

It's a simple quote, but this is what leads Shima to understand his jealousy. He has separated himself from those he finds resilient, and despite believing he has to put on an act to make others happy, Shima is envious of those who can live freely.

Yes, this way of living may have been "easy" for Shima and may have even made many people happy, but it doesn't work anymore. After meeting someone like Mitsumi, he sees someone who isn't afraid to "get her hands dirty." Even Kanechika, who has succeeded with his plays, wouldn't have been able to get to this point without doing a few awful projects.

To find success, you need to be willing to make a mess and fall a few times. Although finding success is significant and unique, the most important thing is finding what you love and doing all you can to achieve your dream. This is why Mitsumi and Kanechika are so resilient. They understand there will be troubles along the way, but no problem is too big if it means they can accomplish their goals.

Shima takes a step forward to a new way of living by being vulnerable with Ririka.

Shima feels guilty about what happened with Ririka from the beginning, but we see him gather the courage to finally form a boundary. He isn't completely cutting himself off because he genuinely cares about her, but he tells her he can't keep following her down this destructive path.

I can not stress enough how important this moment is. He had spent so long doing what people expected of him because he believed it was the right choice. He was a people pleaser to a fault, but now he wants more for himself.

"I enjoy this school."

This is one of the rare moments when Shima is honest about his feelings, especially when he loves something. He loves his school, he loves acting, and he loves his friends, and he isn’t going to keep being the same person who was once passive about everything.

This scene is just so impactful. Following his inner monologue, where he talks about doing what others want and being jealous, now he can unapologetically say what he feels. This entire sequence is just so perfect.

I may be incredibly biased since Shima is one of my favorite characters, but this episode was one of the best-written episodes I have seen. It was a perfect way to end the season, with Shima finally stepping forward to become his own person.

Of course, he'll have moments when he's clumsy, but the important thing is that Shima is ensuring that he has a chance to find himself.

Towards the end of the episode, we get a cute moment between Shima and Mitsumi, which leaves her thinking, "But today, he seems almost like...a kid?"

I just love these last few moments of the episode. The little interaction between Shima and Mitsumi was too cute and such a nice touch to the season finale.

What I love the most about this scene is that Mitsumi notices that Shima has a more childlike air. It's almost like all that weight that was piling up throughout the season is finally gone, leaving Shima with the chance to spend his high school days comfortably.

All in all, this episode was the perfect season finale! The writing, the voice acting, the animation—everything was just so well done. It truly brought the story to life.

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There aren't enough words to describe how much I loved this episode, but I hope this post at least gave insight into why I love this series so much. Shima's growth is one of the best parts of this series, and this episode begins a new chapter in his life.

I love Shima and Mitsumi so much. Skip and Loafer is one of the best pieces of media I have ever read, and it will always have a strong impact on my life.

my favorite recurring kyoru moment is tohru hitting kyo with her pompom scarf

BYE💔💔💔💔💔💔

despite everything, it’s still you.

kghn vacation doodle

little fmab ramble not too long because i feel i probably won’t be able to put thoughts into words much with this but fmab is genuinely one of the animes i feel if you have not watched you one hundred percent should at the beginning it kinda puts you into it without explain and you have so many questions and such but i feel as the story goes in these little threads of the story start becoming more understandable and interesting the plot is one of the things i love so much about fmab bc its very well written and just amazing these two kids are doing everything in their power to try to get their bodies back and like as you’re watching this in your head you know these a children they should not have to deal with this or go through what they’re going through or deal with what they’re going through they should have a peaceful life and then people who you think you won’t feel bad for or don’t really like can end up growing on you like Scar he’s a character who i didn’t like at first but then learning what happened to him and his people you start to learn and understanding why he doing the things he did and you can’t be mad at him for that and what he’s doing bc the alchemist are at fault they should of never did what they did and even some of them realize that and have to deal with the cause of their actions and obviously some of them try to make up for what they did and regret what they did but some others they don’t so you kinda see different perspectives of other and i think the way the story is written is genuinely so amazing and so well written and im not one to say that about a lot of stuff i watch but fmab deserves praise it gets and sometimes im left with more questions than i had at the beginning but with fmab that wasn’t the case at all and all the plot twist within the show were amazing and so well done and Greed which is another character i enjoyed not at the beginning but when it was Greed/Ling i really enjoyed that character and the way Greed gave up his life at the end for Ling and him saying “peace out, soul brothers” and calling Ling and Ed his friends his development was i think very well done and i enjoyed watching it and i also love how they show equivalent exchanges because that’s also another important thing throughout the show because to get something in return you have to give something of equal value hence how the Al lost his body and how Ed lost his arm and leg and it kinda makes me sad thinking about it too because they were two grieving children who just wanted their mother back also the relationships done in this show are so well done too it’s interesting to see people’s dynamics and stuff one of my favorites being Roy and Riza i do believe she was one of his weaknesses as we seen Riza was used again roy before when they were forcing him to do the transmutation that and he ended up doing it for her to save her life they mean so much to me and then him being forced to do the transmutation caused him to lose his eyesight the whole equivalent exchanges playing it part in the whole story and even though Roy didn’t want to do it there’s no way to avoid that happening to him and the Al giving up his body for Ed to have his arm back so he can fight and then my favorite part of the whole series is Ed giving up his use of alchemy to be able to bring Al his body back and no one would ever really except him to do that even truth was shocked when Ed said he was going to give up his alchemy and him saying “who even needs alchemy when i got them” it will always be my favorite part in the whole series Edward and Alphonse Elric you will forever be loved! said this wasn’t going to be long but i yapped sorry for any typos and not using punctuation i forget to use it when i ramble!

inspired by this tweet:

double date :-)

just something about my fav ships that make me so insane. it's not even about the romance (sometimes it is) but more so about the genuine connection between the characters. the bond between them is so strong and you could feel it through the screen. the care, the love (platonic or romantic), is just so obvious. i love watching a relationship grow and develop and how it impacts each character. a bond that makes them better, stronger, and happier is so beautiful. i just love shipping. no matter what, there will always be a relationship that impacts me. i love how human it is to become attached to someone. it's just so beautiful!!!!!!

they make me so happy…itafushi i love you