Strange As It May Seem, I Still Hope For The Best, Even Though The Best, Like An Interesting Piece Of

“Please. All I ask is that you live and give me a chance to show you this world isn’t as ugly as you believe.” Well. I’ve been told that before. Over and over again. I want to believe that they’re right, but every time I’m told this there is always someone there to just leave again.

‘Maybe they just don’t have the piece I’ve been looking for...’ I always persuade myself as I look into that box. That small, worn down box always makes me feel like it’s a constant reminder of what I’m missing out on and all of the bad things that have happened to me. 

It’s been sitting in the same place by the window ever since I was born. They say that when you’re born you have ten little shapes and that whoever has the same one as you is either your soulmate or is someone that you care about. As for me, I only came with five. Four blue circles and a scarlet broken heart. 

The four blue circles have been taken by family members and a friend that I care about but as for the scarlet broken heart, there has never been anyone that has that same piece. I’ve always been told never to show my pieces until I know they are the one... So far the people I thought were the ones never even came close to sharing that final piece.

I wish I never had that stupid piece. It just sits there. Toying with me; rubbing it in my face that I will never be fully happy. ‘Today, today is the day I am getting rid of it.’ As I grab the box I start to think back at the times I had been right about who’s pieces were the same as mine. How much joy it brought me.... and how if I threw away this one I will never be able to feel that way again...

I start to walk out of my apartment with the bow secured tightly in my hold. I fall down as I bump into someone.

“I’m so sorry-” I begin to say as I notice that the piece is on the floor along with the now opened box. The guy I now recognized to be my neighbor right across from me helps me pick it up. 

“Hey,” he says to me as he holds onto my piece, “I have the same exact one.” I look at him in shock as I watch him take off the necklace he was wearing.

Our pieces put together made a fixed scarlet heart.

Prompt 135

“Please. All I ask is that you live and give me a chance to show you this world isn’t as ugly as you believe.”

Be who you are and say what you feel…

The meaning of life is finding your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.

Annonymous

Sorry but... My mom is my everything

Reblog or your mom will die in 928 seconds.

I love my mom.

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

sorry followers :(

Numbers Don’t Matter

38D That's my bra size But my heart is far more larger... Yet all you see is just a prize. 16 Is the size of my pants. Yet most of you just see a big ass. Now here you are starting to make plans. 178.8 lbs That's how much I weigh. So what? It's less than the number of sacrifices I've made. 8 That's the size shoe I where. I've taken million steps even when I didn't want to live anymore... But you don't care. To you, I'm just numbers and nothing more.

No

No.

I never meant to push you away.

To build up all these walls

and forcing myself to believe that everything was okay....

Making you think I don’t care at all.

Never.

I never wanted to hurt you.

I just never met anybody so nice...

because all I knew

was that people came with a price.

Stop.

I need to stop these feelings

that keep reminding me of what I miss.

I wish I could stop all of the wrong things I keep doing....

The things that keep dragging me deeper into this abyss.

Don’t.

Don’t say I “deserve happiness.”...

because I know very well that’s not true.

You don’t know that I really am a mess

because I made sure there was never really any proof.

Won’t.

I will never forgive myself.

For all of the wrong things I have done.

Forever locked away in this cell.

Never able to freely tell everything to anyone.

Can’t.

I feel like I can’t stop this monster

that keeps making me feel less human....

I keep telling it I have nothing else to offer.

Yet it never listens even when I say it over and over again.

None.

This monster called madness is always there.

Never not being so rough.

Making life so hard to bear.

Always feeling like I’m never enough.

..... I give up.

An excerpt from an unknown book:

It’s all your fault. You’re the one that pushed them away. You can never just let anybody in.

I cried as the words kept repeating in my head. They were right. It’s all my fault. I always do this. I have no one to blame but myself...

They were there for you. Why did you let them go? Why did you say all of those hurtful things? Don’t you care?

I do care.... But I just... I was just so afraid. I was afraid of losing them that I thought that I should just never have them in order for it to not happen. During that time I felt they just never cared.... I was so wrong. 

You’re a monster. A disgrace.

Those two sentences seem to be screaming at me in my mind as I look at myself in the mirror.

It would be better if you could just die. Everyone would just be happier without you.

As my once silent tears turn into loud sobs I contemplate whether or not I should finally give in. Holding the razer as it seems to be encouraging me to give it all the power it needs to carry out the deadly deed.

Nobody will be hurt when you leave. No one will be sad.

Right before I do the deadly thing a thought shoots across my mind...

Please.... Someone.... Anyone... Help

Hey

Just to let you guys know -if there is anyone that actually reads my posts- feel free to message me if you want! I love talking to new people! I don't bite XD

If you had not suffered as you had, there would be no depth to you as a human being, no humility, no compassion.

Eckhart Tolle (via purplebuddhaquotes)