Did I Finish Season 2 Of Arcane Or Did Season 2 Of Arcane Finish Me. What The Fuck Did I Just Experience

i fear im so deep into escapism i've forgotten how to live my own life. it all just feels lacklustre in comparison.

no thoughts, just... thinking about the way Ekko looks at Powder...

you couldn't pay me enough money. absolute masterpiece but i'm never touching that thing with a ten foot pole. i didn't even know i could feel pain on that level

When your card declines at therapy so they make you read choices for the first time again.

i think reading crimson rivers as my first jegulus fic and then choices did something irreparable to my psyche.

Regulus Black in choices:

the pov switch was kinda funny when you think about it he was STRESSING

finished choices and i genuinely feel like i've just served on the front lines of a battle and barely made it out alive holy shit. fic so devastating i was crying for hours dry heaving and retching like i genuinely LOOKED sick. so devastating it had me crying in public (which I haven't been able to do for years) So heartbreaking It feels like it carved out a piece of me.

fun fact i finished crimson rivers right before my therapy appointment and i went in there eyes red heart broken in a state of dissociation and she thought it was over my family but no. i was emotionally distraught over two gay men who fought through hell and death arenas to get to each other and have a family and not be a great big tragedy.

worst part of reading choices is the constant what if's i keep asking myself. what if dumbledore had got them out of there? what if regulus had fallen in love with james sooner? what if sirius had taken him with him that day? what if he had just gone with james after the ministry attack? what if he had just stayed at hogwarts? what if he had brought cerci to the cave? what if what if what if.

YOU'RE NOT. I LOVE U TOO. he literally made me so makes me so mad holy shit. Both in choices AND i'm canon they let him get away with too fucking much just cause he was the "leader" of the good side

If I could fist fight Dumbledore right now I’d do it

shit like this is why i'm so devastated by how they ended like. james loved regulus so softly so dearly so purely and regulus loved him back just as much and it still wasn't enough it just wasn't enough to overcome everything else that was going on

James wants to be wrapped up in this boy. This love. He wants to never be able to wash it off his skin. Or out of his mouth. He hopes Regulus has left marks. Hopes he can see them in the morning. He’ll wear them proudly—showing the day how they love in the dark.