Beedee Beedee Beedee Ok Buck 👅

Ranfren yayayyyy

Real 💔💔💔 ranfren ranfren ranfren ranfren ranfren ranfren ranfren ranfren ranfren

The trans guy urge to fucking implode

…🖤

I'm gonna crash tf out Walter when I catch you Walter

Nvm I uhhhhh overreacted. I'm not offing myself I'll just think ab it really hard !!!!!!

Squid bunny I love you thabk you for existing and bestowing your knowledge upon us 💔💔💔💔💔💔

Two and a half years: The overlooked EURINGER song connected to PINK and Self-titled

I'm yapping again ougg this is a crosspost of my twitter thread but cleaned up

Have you ever noticed how the beginning and end of MSI poetically come full circle? Both bring in religion. It starts with the self-titled and ends with PINK, right?. We'd think this would be the last religious reference from Jimmy, but actually, we'd come across it again, for the last time.

The last track of EURINGER, Two and a half years, is a track from an overlooked album that doesn't relate directly to MSI, but does relate to James Euringer, and quite a lot. We all felt like EURINGER was more of a personally instrospective album, with songs like Problematic, Piece of me, That's how Jimmy gets down, and Fuck Everything, that clearly talk about Jimmy's position about many situations that surrounded him at that time.

The part I want to highlight has an explicit religious context, but is often overlooked, not because it’s "boring," but because it’s in spanish. I translated it.

As a native Spanish speaker, I had trouble understanding this: phrases are cut off, reused, reversed, syllables and words are skipped, whispers along with a tense sound. Why would Jimmy do this? Is he trying to tell us (or not tell us) something?

This wouldn't be the first one Jimmy makes something like this, in fact, it reminded me of Envy, a song that also makes use of backmasking, ambiguous sounds and cryptic whispers to deliver a mysterious message.

How much impact does religion have on your life to reflect it in this way?

I wondered about this and looked back on what we already know. Despite knowing that Jimmy is strongly anti-religion, religion has been (or could still be) a profound part of him.

Jimmy was raised in a catholic school and likely a religious household. His Mexican mom, from a predominantly catholic country, may have instilled this faith in him. The video is in spanish, so I interpret his religious influence as coming from his mom.

What is happening in the scene?

My interpretation is: James leaves the table, frustrated by his father's words. He walks out of the house, and we hear him running down the street or getting out of a car until he reaches a place where a speaker/preacher/worship leader is reciting praises.

He opens the door, and we hear the voice more clearly, it makes little echo, so I think it's more like a garage room or empty big room that is used to pray.

(This is what I imagine)

The track then transitions from him being in that room to apparently being in a park or field, with grass, bird and insects around, the tense sound has dissapeared. Could it maybe communicate peace? introspection? melancholy?

For me, I feel that it means this was a flashback, and his mind just returned to the present in his home in New Zealand, where we know there are open fields and animals, hence the sounds.

Finally, the track ends with one simple piano note, which clearly feels melancholic, or contemplative. It’s as if James was reflecting on something, or a painful memory has resurfaced in his mind.

It’s truly fascinating, and I believe it’s something worth exploring if you're interested in this topic. In conclusion, I love how these subtleties exist and invite deeper reflection on his career/life.

THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK like & reblog if you read allat😂😂🤣🤣

Hello, here to remind people that this discourse is hurting nonbinary people as well, especially nonbinary transmascs.

Please include your nonbinary siblings in your advocacy, and don’t forget to uplift their voices as well. The assholes calling people “theyfabs” and denying the existence of transandrophobia aren’t just out to get trans men.

Half the posts I see are about "theyfab trender tme they/hes", they hate nonbinary people too.

Trans men are left out of the conversation far too often; please don't repeat the same mistake with a different group.

my stepdad FINALLY has a fuckinf job !!!!!! The toucher will move out and be gone !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The only bad side is that the chances of my mom and I being homeless is a LOT higher and while she isnt the best mom nobody deserves to be homeless and i dont wanna be put in foster care or some dumb shit like that

Turns out, Wilson thinks he’s gay.

He drops that bomb on a Thursday night, sitting on House’s couch, where they’re splitting a greasy pizza and a large order of onion rings. Wilson’s not nearly drunk enough for it to be a joke, is the thing. His hands and voice are steady when he explains how it’s haunted him since he was a teenager, how he ran from it and into three failed marriages, how he cheated because he liked the thrill of the chase but was always unsatisfied with the outcome. He wants to tell the important people in his life to ask them for support in this new era, and House is the first one to know.

And yeah, it could explain things. A lot of things. Like the haircare routine, the regular mani/pedis, the shoe collection. This wouldn’t surprise many people. But House isn’t sure he believes him.

Still, Wilson is his best friend, so he tries.

He doesn’t interrupt the first time he sees Wilson getting a little too close and smile-y with a male nurse. (He interrupts the second time, because he knows that nurse is a vegetarian, and House can’t have that influencing Wilson’s cooking and takeout habits.)

He doesn’t sabotage Wilson’s first date with another man. (He does steal Wilson’s phone the next morning and delete the guy’s text asking for a second date, because anyone asking so soon is desperate, and Wilson can do better.)

He tells Wilson which shirts, ties, and pants make him look gay, only this time, he means it positively. He starts TiVoing Queer as Folk for them, instead of The L Word. He offers Wilson poppers one weekend, then has to explain what they are, and how he came to find out about them in the first place (he used to rave in the 80’s, so what?).

House is being supportive, really. Even if he still doesn’t totally buy that Wilson is actually gay.

Mostly, he doesn’t think Wilson is gay because nothing changes.

Wilson still comes over most nights to watch trash TV and drink beer. He still dutifully drops his responsibilities at work, albeit briefly, to provide a diagnostics consult, or to assist in some borderline illegal scheme. They still hang out, and argue, and laugh, and bicker, and celebrate wins together, and are there for each other in the quiet aftermath of loss. They’re still the same.

Maybe Wilson is just confused because he expected to have a wife and kids, and to live in the suburbs by now. Maybe he thinks the reason for this heteronormative failure is that he’s been chasing the wrong kind of tail, instead of the fact that he spends half his time at work and the other half with House, leaving no room for anything or anyone else. And maybe House should feel guilty about that, about robbing Wilson of the life he deserves and forcing him into a fake midlife sexuality crisis, but he doesn’t.

He sort of feels bad about that part, though—the fact that he doesn’t feel bad at all.

But he’s forced to acknowledge his faults when Wilson approaches him in his office one night, trembling before he can even get the words out, I can’t hide how I feel anymore, I need to tell you the truth.

House accepts that he’s selfish because he lets Wilson kiss him breathless, knowing Wilson will never be able to kiss anyone else like this again, knowing that when he tells Wilson to take him home, he’ll never be able to leave. Now he gets it all, the early mornings and the late nights, the warm beds and the cold shoulders, the biting words and the gentle apologies, and every jagged edge left will be weathered by time.

He understands that he’s greedy because he drinks up all the praises and pleading, every filthy word Wilson moans into his ear and whispers into his skin. There’s a lifetime of hunger behind it, a cosmic collision of pain and joy and grief and devotion. It’s a wine aged for twenty years between them, bottled want and yearning, poured into an overflowing glass.

He recognizes that he’s possessive, because he knows he’s got him now, and it's for good. There’s no more sharing attention, or waiting his turn, or swallowing the bitter bile of jealousy. Wilson will stray from any map to follow his true north.

So, whatever, maybe Wilson is lying about being gay, but at least House is honest about being worse.

I love being moots with people and then just never talking to them