Breaking News!

The CDC has reason to believe a deadly spike in the love epidemic will occur February 14th.

If you are fortunate enough to have not caught the debilitating disease we urge you, lock your doors and windows, turn off all electronic devices, and read absolutely NOTHING categorized as "romance."

If you have not been exposed and you do not follow the advice listed above, you will surely catch a severe case of the Lovebug.

There is a chance a new strain of the virus will make its appearance on this day. Scientists have dubbed it "Heartsickness."

In clinical trials, the unfortunate people to catch this strain were only cured by catching the Lovebug, which doctors agree, is no cure at all.

There is still no known cure for the Lovebug or any of its various strains and scientists urge that extreme social distancing is the best method of avoidance.

Stay safe out there and we wish you all an uneventful 14th.

“getting the lovebug” but in an aromantic horror way

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writeblr valentines day creative writing aromantism aro pride writers of tumblr aromanticism vday aro memes aromantic positivity writersontumblr

I ran over a turtle once.

Now,

I think it may be some form of karma

that I am that turtle

stalled in my journey after I'd only just begun

never knowing what lies in wait across the road.

Life is a highway,

and I am merely the roadkill smeared upon it.

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writeblr poetry creative writing late night thoughts words words words is this poetry? writersontumblr i hate writing poetry so idk why i did this we're gonna say it is weird poetry rip turtle

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haylee-bb

2 years ago

Allow me to set the scene...

So you're an alien (just go with it) and you have to write a report on human studies.

You with me? Good.

Okay so you go to your local human library (stay with me here) to find some research material but...

Oh no! You only used research from the ritualistic cult section!

We following? Awesome.

So now your entire knowledge of the human race is just ritualistic cults.

Makes sense? Great.

Then you get invited to a humans birthday party (there's a point here I promise) and it's time for cake.

Everybody on the same page? Super.

Alien (that's you) watches as this lovely dessert is brought out and wax sticks are placed into it. The wax is set on fire and everyone gathers in a circle to chant. Once the chanting is complete a chosen one makes a wish on the flaming wax sticks (thus embuing the cake with the magical wish powers obviously) and blows the fire out. Everyone eats the treat and the annual ritual is complete.

All of this is to say...

Birthdays do be a little culty.

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humans being humans humans are space orcs late night thoughts humans are confusing 3 am shit random rambles

146 notes View Post

haylee-bb

2 weeks ago

asexual sex workers are braver than any US marine

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ace pride ace community ace culture now the real heroes are the sex repulsed ace sex workers give those guys a medal

32K notes View Post

haylee-bb

1 month ago

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haylee-bb

6 months ago

Is this a problem?

150K notes View Post

haylee-bb

1 month ago

evangelicals being like "god made men to do This and be like This and women to do That and be like That that's just how it is" and it's just a picture of a white man and woman following traditional gender norms makes me so insane like you boring fascist fucks. god made 2 million species of beetles. god made whales, ducks, humans, and 1500 other species capable of same sex behavior. god made fish and amphibians that change sexes. god made more than 30 different intersex variations in human beings. god, in his infinite curiosity. wake up!!! fuck!!

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haylee-bb

1 month ago

don't forget to leave out milk and knives for brutus tonight

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ides of march tumblr holidays 15th of march happy stab ceaser eve! really brings us together as a community❤️

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haylee-bb

6 months ago