I Wish Someone Would Pick Me Up,

Okay but who invented the trope of the 'hero's side kidnaps the Villains very sweet,meek, kind sidekick/friend/relative for a hostage situation but turns out they're actually scarier than the villain' and have they been awarded a noble peace prize yet. (Bonus points if they're very bossy and the villian is low-key scared of them. Also if they're very old.)

"Hello Villain, we've kidnapped x—" "I'm sorry." "Well you should be and uh," " No, I'm sorry for you, good luck." *Hangs up*

Hero "We don't want anybody to get hurt." "Me either," *standing up already having undid their bindings* "So if you'll just step aside."

*Tiny person dressed in bloodstained pastel colours and floral designs walks into villains lair with a single fork in hand* "Villain! How long does it take to pick up a single person from the hero's, I had to walk all the way over here!" Villain*sweating* "I'm sorry."

The stage between enemies and lovers where they VEHEMENTLY deny their feelings is appreciated a lot, but it still deserves more appreciation like who thought like :/ so these two people okay? And get this they hate each other, kay? But, and here's where it gets crazy they start having FEELINGS for each other! And they do not want to!! Crazy! ;/ Like who thought a person just failing so badly at insulting thier crush will be the funniest shit ever?! AND THEY WERE RIGHT!!

The internal monologue is just like

"look at them humming to themselves! Aww—! Like an idiot! Foolish!! Disgusting shit!!!"

"I wanna do things to them... I mean Violence! Murder! That's what I wanna do, target practice, fish bait!... And now I'm talking to myself "

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Warning- Angst ahead

when the villian and hero couple are in front of the bigger villian that villian worked under and in deep danger and have to pretend to fight to avoid said danger, clumsily throwing punches at each other with with stiff hands, holding a dagger to the throat but it's trembling badly, subconsciously getting close to each and trying to touch in any way for some sort of comfort, fervently glancing at the bigger villian to see how they're reacting, the villians crippling guilt in feeling responsible, trying to communicate with eyes and form a plan but their mind can't work over how scared they are, more for the other person than them

Yeah I want that

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The dark academia urge to attend a fancy ball where everyone has to dip there hands in gold dust that leaves prints behind on whatever they touch. Dancing with a stranger surrounded by people with gold dust in their hair and on their faces and lips and thighs while intoxicating ballads are played live. Being whisked away by your hot nemesis and them wiping gold from your cheeks and holding your eyes till only their prints are left on you, and then they lean close and whisper "that's better, you look beautiful."

Trying for 500follows, pls halp

But the villain and the anti-hero bitching about the popular hero is like the funniest shit ever

"Have you seen them? Blond hair, white costume, holier than thou attitude?"

*deadpan* "Oh, wow, do all heroes have a giant stick up their ass."

"You've kidnapped the mayer? And yet I'm the anti-hero." " What a kiss ass huh?"

"And I thought Villain's monologues were intolerable, do excuse me while I bludgeon myself."

"So you're working with hero now? Being an anti-hero really requires sacrifices huh?" *Grabbing a screwdriver to start working beside villain on their death ray* "Some things are just not worth it"

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Don't mistake me

When I say I'm lovely when I cry it's ugly,

cheeks red and wet with snot.

It's just that I've made a habit of finding tragedy beautiful.

5/idk, follow and reblog to support

You have to appreciate the pure litery brilliance of the 'I hate that I love you'. Agressive adoration. Angry hurt comfort. All of it.

The 'I cant believe I'm doing this' growl before jumping into intervene into horrible situations to save them.

the Angry "You should take of yourself!" And throwing healthy things at them

The 'i can't believe I'd die for you' just being hopelessly in love ready to do anything and absolutely hating it.

Thank you so much for 350 followers btw. Trying for 500

" I would like to, uh get to know you."

"Um, to find out my weakness and use it against me? Dude, we're literally mortal enemies, why are you acting like this is a first date."

"Because you're unlike anyone I've ever known and you're wonderful and I keep waiting for you to disappoint me but you never do, and I don't think this hateful mutual admiration is enough anymore. I want to know the delightful experience of loving you, actually loving you."

Pls Halp trying to reach 500 follows

Enemies to lovers-: taken by surprise in a ball edition

A fancy ball but one party uses it gain advantage and surrounding everybody

Everyone rushing to loosen their ties and take of their jackets and tearing slits in their ball gowns and pulling out the hidden weapons that they definitely weren't supposed to bring

Bonus points if one pulls one out from behind their waistband and make eye contact with the other pulling one strapped on their thigh

Group combat when someone shoots at the ceiling to make the chandelier fall on one of them and the other runs to save them seconds before the impact,

Bonus points if it's the villainous one and they do the annoyed 'I can't believe I'm doing this' growl before running

Post Saving eye contact

When they're fighting and they perfectly matched and in sync and you can just see they'll be such a power couple.

During combat eye contact and banter

I just really like eye contact okay

When one is about to fall back during combat and their opponent grabs their wrist and/or their teammate comes up behind them to catch them.

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I wasn't born with my head cut open

For you to fill with recreations of your own trauma

Like a tragedy bin.

I won't let you mangle

My mind and body

Till I can't see skin beneath the scars.

I will resist;

Brutally and unattractively;

— With fire and blood.

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