I Love This!

Family Discussion-

Jason: Hey baby!

Damian: ewww don’t call me that

Jason: Dick literally calls you that all the time!

Damian: that’s different he calls everyone that

Dick (walks in and pats Tim): hi baby! Hey have you guys seen my new baby?

Them: You’ve had Tim for years?

Dick: I meant my new succulent

Pretty sure we’ve all seen the post ( if you know the one please help me! And put it in the comments :) of Jason getting invited to Jokers trial in the Ghost zone right?

And all those the batfam find out what Tim went through fanfics.

Well how about…

Tim being invited to stand witness for the trial of Ras Al Ghoul?

And that’s how everyone finds out about it. His missing spleen all of it. Not because they were clever detectives or an aware family or because Tim choose to tell them but because of fucking ghost law.

Also Tim playing up the trauma as much as possible for the jury and judge (Danny) to absolute horror of his family. XD

Oh also maybe Damian’s clones get invited I always felt kinda bad for them. But not Damian himself- he’d be so mad lol

Did it!

Batverse - we all know those dekuverse fics that were really popular when MHA came out right? Well that but with the Batfamily. I mean the multiverse is already cannon anyway.

Imagine the drama, the emotionally constipated despair.

Also just the family learning more about each other :)

Ah I see I was mostly thinking of the cult being like hive academy.

Maybe instead of physical training they just taught him to be an excellent actor lolz idk just a funny fanfic prompt

You know I bet Tim with his Flying Grayson/Dick Grayson obsession as a kid probably found lost footage of the time Dick promoted a cult while brainwashed on national television

Omg tag me this is hilarious

Tim was stumped. It wasn't rare for him to get stuck on a case, no. That came with the territory of being a detective.

Someone had swapped out countless jewels and treasures from museums across the city with fakes without tripping a single alarm. Heck, the only reason anyone knew about this was because of the fact one of the workers broke a priceless antique and it was being appraised for insurance purposes. Then everything unraveled from there.

The case was cracked wide open when the guy Superboy the 2nd was introducing to him said, "Oh yeah. That was me." In the most casual tone.

Tim, baffled, asked "Why would you admit that?"

Danny/Phantom smirked, "Three words. Statutes of Limitations." Turns out he had committed all of these crimes across multiple states right under the heroes noses. Worst still, he did all of this when he was fifteen. The Statutes of Limitations had expired and he couldn't be charged with anything, not that there was any evidence to charge him with anyway.

(Idk if this is funnier if they're all in thier hero outfits or as civilians)

Danny ends up dating an alien green lantern

Hal: I know a guy who knows a guy who’s dating this guy that can help us … probably

DPxDC PROMPT:

Danny starts making podcasts about space.

DC guy of your choice listens to Danny in the background while working on stuff.

Danny gets a new boyfriend who already loves his voice and has spent hours at a time listening to him talk about space.

Well if you insist!

Do it do it do it!!!!!!!!!!!

I wanna read it!!!!!!!!!!!

Whatever you write will be consumed with fondness! So hurry up and write it already!!!!!!!

DP x DC Prompt #1

Danny's halfa status gets discovered by his parents and they go full trigger-happy on him. He barely manages to escape, but he is severly wounded still. He's sixteen.

Dani (or Elle or however you wanna call her) finds him by chance (oh nononono Clockwork had nothing to do with this, wink wink) and yoinks him up to bring him somewhere safe. She's a little distracted, so she doesn't notice when she runs -or, well, flies- into a house. Literally. (nop definitely not Clocky's fault)

John Constantine nearly has a heart attack when two fucking ectoplasmic ghosts, the most solid, most radioactive, strongest, most destructive fucking ghosts crash through his window and land right in front of him. For some reason, the House of Mistery hasn't even cursed them despite being uninvited. He's like "welp, guess I'll die, but I ain't going down without a fight" until Dani starts crying and begging for him to help her brother. Then he's panicking because holy fuck these are kids, there's a bleeding dead child in his house.

Then Dani de-transforms and Danny's trandformation breaks as he falls unconcious and holy fuck now there's two very alive kids who used to be dead like, a minute ago and fucking shit that's a lot of blood.

So Constantine patches Danny up and Dani tells them they've got nowhere to go. She's a clone with noo family except for Danny and, well, his parents are the ones that almost make him go from half-dead to fully dead. On a whim, John decides fuck it and lets them stay at his house however long they need to. The House of Mistery is really fucking big after all nd it's already full of monsters and shit, what's two more ghosts to haunt it?

So they spend time together. Shennanigans ensue and a pranking war or two happen at some point. Those fuckers cause him so much trouble he's sure if he hadn't tricked his way into inmortaality he would be getting gray hairs.

Then, at some point, the ghost siblings do something that's incredibly fucking stupid like open up a book of spells constantine hadn't taught them yet and going ballistic through the house, chasing monsters and playing with literal fire. He fixes whatever nonsense situation they'd gotten themselves in (since when was he the one to fix other people's problems?) and scolds them for being dumb and irresponsible when he hits that oh in italics moment and realizes oh shit, I'm a father now.

He scoops them both up in an embrace and tells them thay could have gotten hurt and they both go oh shit, we have a father now.

Basically their dinamic doesn't change, except Dani and Danny call him dad sometimes. They talk about life and death and dying when he finds out they don't have a grave, not even a cenotaph!

The Phantom duo hadn't really thought it was that important. Sure, they were half-dead, but not all the way, why would they need a grave? They didn't even have a body to bury!

But their dad, with his magic, makes them each a gravestone anyway. He puts their names in it, on Danny's he puts his date of birth and death when he was 14, and on Dani's he puts the day she was created and the day she fell through his window.

"Why that day?" she asks. "I was already dead then."

"You were born dead. The dates on a grave are to mark a person's journey and tell their tale. I put the day yoour journey started, and the day it enden, when you came here to rest."

And that was that. He put their graves on the house's prettiest spot on the garden. He placed flowers and lit up candles on them. He put protections on them so nothing would be able to harm them.

Danny and Dani felt lighter, as if a weight they didn't know they carried suddently lifted. Their bodies filled with warmth and love everytime their dad left flowers on their cenotaphs or they left them for each other. They were thankfull for them now.

Meanwhile, the JL and the JL Dark were both getting worried. Sure, Constantine was always sectretive and distant, but this was already excessive. He barely picked any calls, and when he did he barely talked and sounded incredibly tired (Dani and Danny's fault). When they had a meeting, he looked like death warmed over. Tired, disheveled and depressed (damn he missed the little shits, he couldn't wait until the meeting was over to get back home) and he always got a longing look every time he saw one of them with their protegés (he really misses his kids, damn he's got it bad for them). This has been going on for a few months and he's only getting worse.

So they ask to go visit him. Y'know, to go check on him. Just to see if he was okay. Constantine's annoyed but his kids convince him to let his friends visit him. They don't want to be seen by them (they're kinda scared of strangers) but they think their dad should hang out with his co-workers. It's not healthy to be cooped up in the house, even they get visits from Sam and Tucker!

So the JLD came to the House of Mistery. They were just catching up a bit when some magic fuckery happens and somehow they end up on the gardens outside the house (which is really just some grass and wildflowers John calls a garden). Constantine tells them to stay there untill he comes back from fixing whatever the fuck that was.

Of course, they don't stand still. They go fuck arround the "garden" while they wait for him to get back, and they come across two tombstones. Their blood runs cold when they read the names.

Daniel and Danielle Constantine.

Daniel had been dead for two years, but he was only fourteen. Danielle had been born a month or two after Daniel had, so whoever their mother was had been already pregnant when Daniel died. The girl, just two years old, had died very recently. She died just when Constantine had started to act strange.

Their friend was grieving his kids. Fuck, they didn't even know John was a father! Where was the mother? Was he married? Why didn't he tell them? Was the mother dead? Why wasn't she burried there, then? Had she left? Was their friend grieving alone?

They got back to where their companion told them to wait in. Now they understood why he didn't want them snooping arround. They decided to help their friend however they could.

Misunderstandings happen.

Tim: hey guys what’s wrong

Jason: We’ve been trying to get a hold of B but the fucker won’t pick up

Dick: we’ve tried everything!

Tim: let me call him

Damian: tt pretender what makes you think father will pick up for you

Bruce: Tim!

Ghost Helpline chapter 40

Secrets before dinner 3

Jack peered closely at the green vials, “No way, you actually pulled off recreating a medical grade ecto degecto?!!”

“What like it’s hard?” This bitch.

Before the two could start another fight Ziyad placed their hand down on the little vamps shoulder. Ziyad took over the conversation quickly, “This is great Wilbur, I assume were being given the test batch?”

“Well I cant just go around poisoning my patients now can I？” the manic man laughed, “Though I suppose I can but that would be bad for business.”

Ziyad held back sighs, he admittedly hated working with Wilbur but this was for the greater good. Magical creatures (half breeds his mind unwontedly whispered to him) in the mortal world needed healthcare, and they surly weren’t getting it. Trust came hard to them. Understandably. And while king Phantom was doing his best he couldn’t be everywhere at once. And even if he could be there would always be a sour taste at accepting aide from royalty.

No instead people were more willing, happier even to seek out black market healing guilds like Wilburs. At least then you knew exactly what the catch is.

“Im sure your clientele appreciate it.” Ziyads smile stretched thin. He really hated working with Wilbur, “Speaking of your clientele, when can I schedule my sister to see you?”

Ecto degecto was still in its infancy of being considered a universal blood type for magic kind, but for the death touched it was a necessity. A necessity they weren’t even sure she needed or not. It would be best to check, and Wilburs guild was good at gathering info on his sisters illness. It probably helped that their family paid him so well. Ziyad thought as he bit the inside of his cheek raw.

—- —- ——

Tims heart raced, his sister? His sister?!!! Tim could sill remember the first time he saw the Masters family. The were all gathered about laughing and smiling. They looked so happy.

She looked happy, wheelchair bound and attempting to run her siblings down.

He’d been jealous. Jealous and sad. And suddenly any thoughts of Vlad Masters being some up and coming big bad had disappeared from his mind and he sold his old empty house on the spot. As if the money could somehow be as warm as that laughter.

No no after that first meeting he never suspected Vlad Masters.

He should have suspected his son. Tim grimaced at his own sense of vindication. Guess there not such a happy family after all.

— —- ——

Jason was actually properly shocked at what he heard. …Was …..was this guy EXPERIMENTING on his sister!!! Green threaded to swallow him whole, how dare he! How dare he hurt someone like that! Hurt his family! Hurt a kid.

Holy shit the kid!

Was the kid his sister?? They needed to intervene now!

This sick fuck is going down.

—- —- —-

Jack wasn’t named after anyone in particular. Violet had renamed him far before she had met the Masters family. Far before they knew. /that/ story. Before any of the kids knew about any of the stories that came before them and by then the name Jack had stuck. But being called Red, even as a code name, felt special in its own way.

Violet and Red like a ridiculous beautiful color combination a pair idiots would make up. And they did. Violet, Konstelacio and Red, Jack. The first time around he had been named Jack because it was common, grounding, easy to play off as foreigner trying to fit in. It was practical. But Red? Red was like roses and hearts and blood and Violet. Like being renamed to compliment her entirely. It made him feel secure.

Now if only it also wasn’t also so common.

“It’s Red —-Red——!”

What ?

All Jack heard was his own name as he tripped over the side of a table clutching his stomach as a bullet wizzed by. Crying out as the bond between him and Violet chooses right then and there to flare up terribly.

“Red!”

“Kid! Oh my gods they shot Red!”

—- —- —-

Ziyad feels something off. Gotham was full of shades and shadows and spirts. He had grown use to the felling of being watched but this felt different. Different he scoured the warehouse turning his eyes up the window just as glass shatters to the ground, damn it, “Its Red Hood and Red Robin!! Get down!” He cant reach Jack before he falls yelping in pain clutching his side, he can hear Wilburs yell clearly too clearly, “Kid! Oh my gods! They shot Red!”

He’ll think about how horrible he is later. Later in bed he’ll think about what Reds blood hands and never seeing that kid in the kitchen at fucking midnight ever again. How he’d never get to hear him and — argue over mechanics and science ever again. Later he’ll think about how lucky they all are to not be mortal. Later, later Ziyad will tear himself apart over his piss poor decision making.

But in the moment all he can think about as he sees the kid get shot is, ‘shit, Violets never going to forgive me.’

He doesn’t think at all as Red Hood rounds closer to them, doesn’t pull back his punch because whoever this guy is he is most defiantly not mortal. Not anymore. And while Ziyad might not be a halfa, he is also defiantly not mortal. He doesn’t think and punched Red Hoods helmet hard enough to crack it.

—- —- —-

Jason is momentarily thrown at the shout of “Oh my gods! They shot Red!” Whipping his head around to look at Tim. Tim whose throat he cut, Tim who he hurt and ignored and mistreated. He looks for only a second and a second is all the man needs to get one over on him.

Gripping his head Jason dodges a kick rights himself back up. The kid is on the floor behind them, shes on the floor. Just like Tim. Jason hadn’t been aiming at her. He didn’t mean to.

Swing. The bastard doesn’t let up for a minute and it takes too long for him to realize the space growing between them and the kid until its to late. Beanie guy throwing various liquids at Red Robin as he yanks the pink teen up harshly and makes a dash for it. Whatever he threw at Tim is turning to smoke, odviscating his view of the man he’s fighting.

All he can see is green eyes. All Jason can hear is Tim choking on smoke. On his own blood. On the blood Jason put there.

Oh it is on!

—- —- ——

The vigilantes take stalk of their surroundings. The men had run off with the case of lazerous water but several crates remained, Marked with letters SBS. Tim walked over to the closest one, he had work to do.

He does his best to block out the sound of Jason behind him, he cant do this right now. He cant. Focus on the case. Focus on the case. This was way bigger than the initial drug ring he assumed it would be and he needed as much info as he could get.

“I need an explanation Tim! And I need one now.” He heard his brother growled out, lovely.

Ignoring his questions he pried the top of the box open. What the hell. What the actual hell? This wasn’t drugs or lazerous water this was so much worse.

“Jason shut up.”

“Fuck no you -“

“Jason shut up and look.”

The crate was insulated, cold. And filled with blood bags.

Walker sheds a single tear: I’m so proud of them !

You think the Zone has its version of Comic Con?

Like? Think about it. You have literally all of time to work on it, your Magnum Opus, your life's work. That DREAM comic. All the supplies you could ever wish for. Endless paper. Endless ink. You can practice and practice for CENTURIES until it's JUST right.

Wouldn't you want to share it?

There are definitely Ghosts who have Obsessions that make them collect.

And two people meeting would lead to a group. Lead to a bigger group. Lead to a large group. A gathering. A crowd even. Eventually you need a Lair to meet IN. It becomes An Event.

People hear about it.

Want to bring other art mediums. Food stalls. Report on it. It grows. Shoot offs start happening. Niche meet ups.

But like?

Unlike comic con? It's all FREE. Sure, you might have fork over the ecto to make your copy. And yeah, weaker ghosts can only do that so many times. Will have to prioritize. But? They can come back after leaving for a nap. Ask a buddy to come with. There ARE work arounds.

Just? Imagine the unbelievable HIPE? Danny would feel? But be unable to TELL anyone about? Zone Con happens several times a year! Cause so many people wanna come. The Zone being infinite, after all.

Problem 1? They're using THEIR standard of a "year". Which is actual 5 earth years. So it's only happens every year and a half for him. And Problem 2? He can't even TALK about how excited he is about Z Con with anyone (outside his friends and family) because they haven't heard of it and might Ask Questions.

It's ALSO held in a part of the Zone that's like? Three days of flying away from the portal. And no amount of begging is gonna get any of his loved ones to camp in the Speeder for around six-ish days just to go to a Con.

So you can imagine his DELIGHT. His utter JOY and *Target Spotted* "!!!" Noise, when? In the crowd? He spots A HUMAN! Hi fellow human!!! Omg, wanna be Con Besties? *doesn't even wait for an answer*

So now? This sad, blonde, deeply lost and kinda alarmed, trench coat dude? Is Danny's new Z Con Going Bestie! You got a map yet, bestie? No? That's cool, he has one. By the way, he has human food in the Speeder if you nee-

YES!

Cause, see, here's the THING. John? Lost to the Realms Infinte. Or Infinte Realms. Translation was iffy... and on fire... like the rest of the building. It was him or the kids those psychos had kidnapped, for what fucked "ritual" the voices in their heads, that THEY thought were demons but frankly he's pretty sure was just feedback from-

Look, doesn't matter, he had to choose. He always knew someday he'd have too. That even twisting Luck and talking fast wouldn't quite be enough. And he had to decide, in that moment, which outcome mattered more to him. They get out safe, or he does.

Wasn't much of a question, was it?

So, there he is. Staring down oblivion and all those debts unpaid. 'Bout to see who's gonna come for him this time, and take what left of wretched soul. When? He bleeds on the FUCKIN two-bit crap circle they squiggled in God only knows what. Remembers that "oh YEAH, set dressings!" Sometimes when you focus too hard on insuring a Good Outcome?

You weird weird as shit byproducts happening on the side to balance it all out.

Or BAD ones.

He wakes up someone fucking green and crowded. For the life of him can't tell you which one it is. And THAT was of course, bout two days ago.

Biggest and most immediate problem? He... does NOT recognize what flavor of magical fuckery this is. Doesn't seem Fae. And doesn't smell like Hell. There are... there are honest to God BOOTH BABES hanging around. Hunks too. The view is LOVELY.

And nerdy.

Very, very nerdy.

But he isn't THAT out of touch. So he should recognize SOMETHING. Or at least the languages. But nope! It's like aliens and magic had a nerd baby and dipped it in GREEN. And the worst thing? Is there is food everywhere, but it all glows and John's not stupid enough to eat it.

Then? Sweet merciful fuck. Salvation! Some teeny bopper Barely No Longer Teen fresh faced INFANT of a Hero kid. With a SHIP. Who has FOOD and a clear idea of where they are. Hello~ John's new BEST FRIEND. Yes. Absolutely. Con Buddies, whatever.

Just feed me, kid.

Only? Once he inhales like 5 "Fenton rations"? He only gets half way through introducing himself before getting interrupted. Kid hears "magic" and "occult Detective" and just? Goes "oh! So you wanna check out the magic Ally with me? Sam wanted me to pick up some witchy stuff!"

..............how magic?

(In Which? Constantine becomes Danny's interdimensional Con buddy)

@the-witchhunter @hypewinter @hdgnj @mutable-manifestation @lolottes @nerdpoe