Look I'm Not Saying Ayme Miura Is Now My Favorite Person In World All I'm Saying Is That He Is So. Damn.

Lucifer knows he’s a G6, and I ain’t gonna trade him in for a Nissan.

I love me a (pea)cocky boi.

this was kinda hot tho ngl

Draw! The! Boys! As! Rats!

That is all, plzkthx.

What if Mammon had an albino rat?

I had a name for the rat, but then I realized it was sort of racist-

You have no idea how much I want to do this when opposing counsel calls me to bitch.

OC: “Well really Facebook isn’t supposed to tell the government when their users upload child exploitation material so I’m going to file a motion to suppress-”

Me: BANG BANG MOTHERFUCKER

And I love them both.

I actually like these! You could add brush strokes/texture or something like that and it would be an Impressionist Obey Me!

Today I hope to give you nightmares so may I present... my art without lineart 😌

Anybody who lives in the Southern US probably has seen those Chick Tracts, the comics you find left in gas station bathrooms and liquor stores that tell you how Dungeons and Dragons/Catholics/Muslims/THE GAYS are secretly demonic forces that want to send you to hell forever.

I would pay an unholy amount of money for Jack Chick to return to life, learn that there are people playing a game about dating Lucifer himself, draw a cartoon pamphlet about how evil this all is, and die again of a rage-induced brain bleed.

Then I would use it to make a paper-mache statue of Asmo touching himself.

Or, like, some paper roses, whatever.

So I saw a video on YouTube recently where it was a DIY paper rose. I think it was 5 min crafts but don't quote me on that (I didn't click the video).

But BUT

It got me thinking about an MC who's mad at one of the OM brothers. But of course they still love said brother. Which leads to this:

MC: I made you a paper rose

Brother: Oh, thank y-

MC: It's made out of Bible Paper

Or, alternatively:

MC: It's made out of a pamphlet I got from a church telling me how to rid myself of demons

And if you’re really worried about stress eating or being unhealthy during the pandemic, you can do better things than shit yourself silly after drinking whatever diet tea you saw on Instagram. Besides the fact that they don’t work, a lot of diet programs you find on social media will either harm you (because they’re extremely restrictive or call for taking some unregulated supplement containing hell knows what) or your wallet (because when you order a program they’ll steal your credit card number or sign you up for some autoship mess).

Go for a walk, do some yoga, play with a dog, make something healthy but tasty, like an omelet with veggies or pancakes with fruit (yeah, I love breakfast food, come at me bro). Doing these things might not even make you lose weight, but they will make you feel good.

Or engage in my favorite form of self care, dousing yourself in Vaseline and sliming around the floor while you play at being a slug.

You don’t owe it to anybody, at any time, and especially not during a global pandemic, to be a certain size or shape. You are making it through an unprecedented disaster and that makes you a certified fucking badass.

I love you all and I support you in doing whatever you gotta do, you rock star.

Diet companies will be hitting hard this year. Be prepared to hear repeated sentiments of “It’s time to get rid of that Quarantine 15” and “In these hard times, commit to taking care of yourself with healthy living and weight loss.”

This rhetoric is going to be everywhere. And due to the nature of modern advertising, the vast majority of it will be coming from people online who just look like they’re trying to share some good advice with the followers that they love so much. You’ll barely be able to see the money getting thrown at them from the weight loss industry.

Don’t reward them for using these manipulation techniques - Buying their products and losing weight isn’t going to make your year any better, or erase the stress of the pandemic, or be the first step in self-care.

Please please please see these ads for what they are - A way of preying on your insecurity and trauma in order to make money.

Raphael is about to see some gangsta shit, ngl

I dare you. I double dare you.

Let’s say, hypothetically, I am madly in love with Gritty and Gritney. And maybe I want to be in a Grit sandwich. Are they related? Would that be icky? Or are they just the same species?

I’m asking for hypothetical reasons.

Hypothetically.

Apparently there's a gritney now?

riotrogers from twitter made the gritney costume and it's honestly amazing.

I went mosque-hopping while in Cairo (years ago, because I am An Old) and they are every bit as awe-inspiring as the cathedrals of Western Europe.

Bonus: the kids loved running up to me and touching my hair, because it was red and Euro-looking, and also they wanted to practice English and it was fucking adorable, and that never happened to me in Italy or France so...

And they give you disposable shoe covers and hajibs if you happen not to be a Muslim and wear your hair out, which I thought was neat. I’ve never been treated better at a place of worship - that was also true when I went to a mosque in Greenville, South Carolina, people were so kind and welcoming and happy to talk to someone who just wanted to hear about a different religion. On my religious journey I did have a dude at a church in Rome try to convince me to become a nun, but that felt...uh, different. Lol.

I am always awed by the diversity of human interaction with the divine. I’m an atheist myself, but religion is just so damn beautiful. Much love to all my brothers and sisters of all faiths.

Nobody ever talk to me about the catholics going off with stained glass again because not one window of jesus has ANYTHING on the Nasir al-Mulk Mosque

Click through this link i’m losing my mind its gorgeous