You Know What’s The Worst Of Crying?
You know what’s the worst of crying?
It’s when you try to steady your breath, a tear escapes your eyes and suddenly you are a god damn waterfall.
It’s when a sound must escape your chest and you have this urge to stop it in your throat.
It’s when you can’t breathe out loud cause you know you’re gonna be on full bawling.
It’s when you have to put a hand over your mouth or bite something just to suppress everything and hope that if something else hurts you won’t notice the pain eating you inside.
It’s when your head starts to ache and hope you just fall asleep while holding tightly to your pillow or a blanket.
It’s when the world is quiet and the only noise you hear is coming out of you.
It’s when you thought you already healed and you remember the pain you’ve already forgotten.
It’s the worst of crying because while you want to release everything you can’t go looking at the past like it’s not affecting your present.
It’s the worst because no one can know. Not that you’re being stubborn or putting a brave face, it’s the worst because you chose to do it alone. Because you actually know what to do, you just don’t know how.
Tonight’s drama is on me. I dwell on it and guess whose heart hurts now? 🤷🏽♀️
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#how to look at your best friend properly
It was a moment between the day and night, In between lunch and dinner time, It comes when you least expect it. But you just had to know, You have to keep going ;
😍😍
I guess, if you ever ask me if I still love you. I’d say, I do. I love you. I still do. There are times that I still think of you, and I hope you do, too. But, I’ve forgotten more than I could actually remember.
So, I guess, if you ever ask me if I still love you. I’d say, I do. My love for you will always be somewhere. It stays wherever you chose to leave me, wherever I chose to leave it. And, it’s here. Never moving. Never growing. It stays wherever I want. It stays behind.
It’s suffocating,
loud and exhausting.
It’s a downward spiral
And I let myself fall
In the rabbit hole.
A space of my heart,
Locked away.
For oh so long.
You knew about it
And you question
The small confine
Where you belong.
You hold the power
Over me
No one ever had,
Will ever have.
Am I just
Punishing myself?
Not making peace
With the choice
I’ve made.
How come
You don’t want me
In your life?
When I will
Welcome you
In my arms
A thousand times.
A gentle reminder of us
“I would’ve love you for the wrong reasons, and I would’ve love you more for the right reasons. But one thing is for sure, we will tear and break each other apart.”
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ambruks reblogged this · 5 years ago
