All-the-thoughts-ever-thought - A Collection Of Thoughts

I think about this cake every day

It’s so hilarious that Endgame was supposedly the greatest event in cinematic history and less than a year later nobody talks about it ever and if it’s brought up again the collective response is just “oh right”

When we were children, my sister had private music lessons at her violin teacher’s house. I only visited there once, but I still remember that afternoon. The teacher had an artificial pond in her yard, a large beautiful thing with lily pads and plant life. And in the pond, there were goldfish. I had never seen such enormous goldfish. 

I spent several minutes just staring at them (and trying to convince them to bite my fingers.) When my sister’s violin lesson ended, her teacher came out to the yard and explained that these goldfish were the same small creatures that were often unfortunately sold in plastic bags at state fairs. They were only about two inches long apiece, when she bought them and put them in the new, empty pond. In essence, they were like every goldfish I had seen before, but they had been given a much larger, much richer environment in which to flourish. As a result, they had grown into some of the most remarkable, vibrant creatures my twelve-year-old self had ever met with. All because of a pond.

Funny what lessons children remember.

There’s something inherently hilarious about taking one of those indie puzzle-platformers that’s intended to be a contemplative exploration of personal identity or mental illness or what have you and speed-running it.

tag yourself

inspired by my awesome talented wife @grrlterrier❣️

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Small Town Grocery Store Stories: LGBTQ+ friendly edition

Me: minding my own damn business in the grocery store

One of my students and a few of his teammates enter the dairy aisle. 

My student is holding hands with one of his teammates. 

My student: Oh hey, Professor X!

Me, who has both my student and his girlfriend in my class: …Hello

My student, looking at his hand-holding partner: Oh! Don’t worry. My girlfriend knows. Not that I’m cheating! I’m not cheating. I’m not gay.

Hand Holding boy: Not that being gay is a bad thing! It’s a good thing!

My student: Right! But no, listen. We aren’t together, we just hold hands in public sometimes.

Hand Holding Boy: Especially on Friday nights. And weekends. And at away games.

My student: Because sometimes people will say shit and then we can punch them! And if the fight started because someone was being homophobic, coach won’t get mad at us.

Hand Holding Boy: Always nice to punch a homophobe. And [gesturing to another boy in the group] maybe they’ll think twice about saying something to [other boy’s name] if he ever gets a boyfriend and wants to hold his hand for real. The Gay One, resigned but smiling: I’ve decided it’s sweet and not really fucking weird.

happy national coming out day to everyone who plans on coming out today

happy national coming out day to everyone who’s been out for a while

happy national coming out day to everyone who can’t come out

happy national coming out day to everyone who could come out but isn’t ready

you’re all valid and i love you

My current favourite tiktok trend is the one where people wrap presents to look like something they're not and some people get ridiculous with it

Like:

✨The dedication ✨