Touya Todoroki - Blog Posts

Hokuto Hero outfit!! The blue version is when his fire is activated (in a neutral mode).

Baby Hokuto! You may have seen the kid art I did of him with blue tipped hair! He only has blue hair and wings when his fire quirk is activated. It’s like endeavors fire beard!

Also, he was a really tiny baby since he came from an egg.

Hokuto: Growing Up Headcanons

✧˖*°࿐ Newborn

『♡』 He hatched from an egg! He clawed his way out using his talons to chip away at the egg. He did have an umbilical cord to absorb the nutrients from the egg yolk. There was no air sack as the inside of the egg was like the womb.

『♡』 Hokuto was a premature baby. He hatched earlier than he should’ve, and because he developed in an egg he was a lot smaller than most babies! But he grew to a normal newborn size rather quickly.

『♡』 He had the tiniest wings! They were mostly baby down feathers, so he couldn’t fly.

『♡』 He preffered laying on Dabi because he was warmer than Hawks. Dabi would be annoyed, but then got an ego about it saying he was just better than Hawks.

『♡』 He wasn’t breastfed as Hawks couldn’t produce milk. Though he laid the egg, his body didn’t have the right facilities to produce milk.

『♡』 Hokuto’s quirk was active when he was a newborn. His wings were present and he was able to move them, and his wings burst into flames every so often.

✧˖*°࿐ Toddler

『♡』 His first words were mama and dada. Hawks was mama! It was an accident at first, but Dabi would train Hokuto to call Hawks mama behind his back since he thought it was really funny.

『♡』 When he was a toddler his feathers filled out! He was able to fly around by age two. This caused panic for Dabi and Hawks as they had to baby proof the entire house… including the ceiling now.

『♡』 Dabi would tie a leash to Hokuto’s ankle to keep him from flying away. And yes, he would give a big rug on Hokuto’s leash to yank him outta the air.

『♡』 It was around this time Hokuto started to feel the need to collect food for the family. His bird instincts kicked in! He’s more bird like than Hawks. He began to hoard seeds in his pillow case. When Hawks and Dabi found out they were shocked.

『♡』 He got his first punishment for hoarding seeds and other snacks in his room. Hawks said no hugs for two days, and Hokuto didn’t like that at all. He felt it was unfair. They had their first fight over this.

『♡』 He was super curious about how he hatched from his egg, and he realized… He ate chicken eggs a lot. He refused to eat eggs for a good year and a half because he felt guilty for eating his ‘brethren,’ as he put it.

『♡』 Super cuddly! He was obsessed with Hawks. He always rubbed his face against Hawks. They rubbed noses a lot. Dabi was jealous of the two… his son giving love to Hawks and Hawks giving love to his son. He wanted in. He also became worried Hokuto loved his mom too much.

『♡』 Hokuto got cute aggression when he saw Hawks. He loved his wings and get really excited for cuddles. He was just a mamas boy.

✧˖*°࿐ Teen

『♡』 Dabi was protective and almost possessive of Hokuto. He would get really upset if Hokuto showed signs of leaving (in Dabi’s mind) like when he got a partner or went out with friends a lot. Dabi had abandonment issues, and he struggled seeing Hokuto grow up.

『♡』 Hawks would rather have Hokuto fly free and do as he pleaded, even if it was risky, while he still lived with his parents. This way they could protect him and knew what he was up to.

『♡』 Hokuto laid his first egg when he was a teen! It was underutilized, so it was never going to hatch. They had a burial for it and Dabi stayed silent, thinking his this was like burying semen (lol).

Hawks places a feather on hokuto and uses is like an apple AirTag. Gotta keep his baby safe <3

Another Touya jaw thought. So teeth survive fires fairly often. So like. AFO prob just plucked his teeth and put ‘em in the new jaw he shoved in Touya’s skull.

Yknow how endeavor has that urn box for Touya? Do you think he cremated the jaw or is it just chilling in there… uncooked.

Baby Hokuto’s first time seeing the city off a skyscraper <3 He’s still in the design process, so his looks might keep changing.

{fake screenshot}

Hokuto’s First Egg

When hokuto laid his first egg, he fiercely guarded it. It was a pathetic, small egg… but his bird brain took over and told him it would hatch. When it didn’t, he was heartbroken. He was fairly young at the time, so he didn’t understand everything. Hawks suggested they bury the egg and say goodbye. Hokuto agreed, and they did a burial… It was pretty dramatic. Hokuto crouched by the buried egg and stared at it for quite a while. The entire time this happened, Dabi followed and silently watched. Hawks wouldn’t let him speak cuz he knew he’d say something insensitive.

As dabi watched hokuto stare at his buried egg, he thought, “is this equivalent to burying… nut…?”

Dabi’s somatic nervous system was damaged. It’s why he can’t feel pain and likely he struggles to feel the thing she touches.

With this comes muscle spasms and twitches from the loss of control of the SNS. His muscle probably randomly spasm when he’s just chillin. (But it seems like Dabi’s damage is more leaning toward the sensory nerves rather than the motor nerves).

Other symptoms that dabi may suffer from because the the sensory nerve damage: Muscle weakness, shakiness, numbness, sexual dysfunction, bladder and bowel dysfunction.

W fanon dabi being so sexual I’d like to add that he’s prob broke his d off in multiple people and had to fish it out

I did these a while back 😗 I prefer w scars 🤝

Him trying to do the same with Dabi:

"So like you know I'm best bros with Natsuo so you get why I can't allow Endeavor to die yet-"

"You're what with who?" "Oh, have you never had a best bro before? We sorta bonded over his brother's death, just how best bros do."

"The fuck is wrong with you?"

Cue Dabi slowly realizing his sorta maybe not really ex actually stayed in contact with his brother and are now plotting Endeavor's demise together.

(dumb convo incoming that makes 0 sense out of context aka doesn't make sense outside my head)

"Bro I thought brothers were off-limits" - hawks

"Bro it doesn't matter we all knew you had a thing for Touya" - natsu

"SHIGARAKI IS YOUR WHAT?" - dabs

then they live happily ever after !

Best Bros

Future fic idea????

this appeared in my head 11:32 in the night exactly and it won't leave my brain

Hawks and Natsuo are best bros who mention that they are best bros 24/7 regardless of the situation. This somehow changes everything.

contains: swearing, alcohol use word count: 3.3k

"get up."

touya groaned. it took him a couple of seconds, but when he finally came to he was instantly hit with a splitting headache. touya moved to bring a cooling hand to his forehead only to find that he could only feel a heavy tingling sensation in his arms— and in his hands and in his legs. all the telltale signs of a hangover— at least his typical (extreme) version of one. he even had tomura on his ass, all the boxes on the ‘i got totally wasted last night’ checklist were ticked off.  

“wake up.” 

touya heard a small thunk from somewhere nearby— probably tomura kicking something —and finally decided that it was time to blink his eyes open. 

immediately, he knew exactly where he was. touya could distinguish the coarse texture from the beat-up seven-year-old couch lying in the LOV staff room any day. the mixed smell of a dewy morning breeze and the lingering scent of touya's signature cigarette brand sent a pumping to his blood that couldn’t be ignored.  he grinned and lifted himself so he was resting back on his elbows, head tilted up in tomura's direction. “hey birdie.” 

tomura sucked in a breath through his teeth and spun around, going right back to sit at his desk. touya watched his blue-haired roommate, observing the way tomura put his glasses on before inevitably gluing his eyes onto his computer screen. tomura looked tired to say the least; his clothes were disheveled and his hair was a mess— as if he had been up all night.  “you went looking for me?” touya's tone was cocky. he reached for the water bottle beside him, the water bottle that somehow always ended up by his side after a long night. he never asked about it— the fear of a petty tomura deciding to take away his one princess privilege steering his decision.

but when tomura scoffed out a small, “no,” touya's grin faltered. “you were outside.”

touya took a sip of the room-temperature water, curious eyes on tomura. “outside?” 

“yeah.” tomura replied as he opened a drawer from his desk and skimmed through some documents. “wasted to shit asleep on the bench.” touya brows furrowed momentarily, attempting to skim through his drunken memories of last night. before touya could properly reconnect them, tomura spoke again. “you didn’t walk here?” tomura's red eyes met touya's blue ones, an intrigued expression shining through the lenses of his glasses. 

“shit, i don’t remember.” touya gained the courage to push past the tingling and move, swinging his legs off the couch. his boots hit the wooden floor beneath him as he gave a half-shrug. 

“you don’t remember?” tomura repeated, sounding annoyed. “where’d you even go?”

touya leaned back into the mustard-stained couch, hands pressing against its backboard. “that new bar.” his head fell back, smile pointed up to the room's ceiling. “moonlight.” the words fluttered off his tongue, the legacy of moonlight clear in his mind. 

“what the fuck!?” tomura’s chair let out a squeaky whine at its sudden movement. he had stopped typing his laptop, attention fully on touya.  "really?!"

“yep.” touya expressed with a pop of his mouth. “and i know their secret.” he said, sounding most obviously pleased with himself. it was the one thing touya had managed to remember from last night— he recalled repeating it out loud to himself for that exact reason. “young hires.”

[ ELEVEN HOURS EARLIER ]

keigo left three hours ago and you were still trying to convince yourself that you could last the final two hours of your shift on your own. 

the sky had grown dark, a lapis blue painting a beautiful backdrop for the lamp-lit city. the cool contrast created an orange-tinted scene inside of midnight. the constant clinking of beer glasses and clicking of heels against the bar floor had left a distant ringing in your ear— along with keigo's words about the nearby job opportunity. the rag in your hand scrubbed up against the surface of the wooden counter as you cleaned up a spill in thought. you were so deep in it that you almost didn’t hear a voice of question coming from beside you.

“excuse me. you— yeah you!” the voice gradually grew within range. you blinked out of your daze and turned your head in the customer's direction. the voice had come from a man who looked to be in his mid-30s and held a strong glare. 

“sorry, sir,” you muttered, tucking the rag under the counter and placing both your hands on the table, steady and attentive . “what would you like to drink tonight?”

“whiskey. neat.” he gruffed, resting his arm up against the bar's pillar.

you stopped a displeased expression from planting onto your face and forced a tight smile. “right up.” you reached for a glass on the shelf— along with the man's desired drink of choice —and began to pour. as you did, you were able to examine the customer. 

he was leaned right up against the counter, flannel jacket resting on the hardwood counter. he was a big guy with a big hat— the type of hat that reminded you of old western films. his bread wasn’t too long or bushy— it was just enough to frame his face in the right places, making him appear well-aged and rugged. using these observations, you put together that this man was from the countryside— and that’s before you accounted for his dirty hands, his worn jeans, and his manners. 

you placed the drink in front of the man and gave him a polite nod, hoping that would be enough to get him to go and bother someone else. but of course, it wasn’t. 

“hey.” he tipped his head a bit closer in your direction, fingers tapping along the rim of his freshly poured glass of whiskey. you gritted your teeth, mostly to mentally prepare yourself— another asshole encounter at work was the last thing you needed right now. the man then grinned, a large yet playful one. “this is a pretty nice city dontcha think?”

your eyes narrowed in suspicion. this could’ve been worse, way worse. 

“yeah, it is,” you replied matter-of-factly. you’ve been living in orion for just over three years now. and though you didn’t necessarily move here for the sights, you couldn’t deny that the town was beautiful.

what you liked about orion was it has a sense of community— and security. you’ve gotten used to the sound of kids calling to their friends in the streets while parents frantically chase them down. the song that slipped between your neighbors' windchimes remain a familiar melody in your mind. there was always some type of event, or function, or party. you liked it. it kept you, and everyone else, busy. distracted. 

the bearded man chuckled. he took a sip of the drink— face showing no reaction to the alcohol—before saying, “i’m actually new around these parts.” you knew he was lying. you’ve caught sight of him throwing up behind the bar twice within the three weeks. he had a reputation for those types of things.

what you hadn’t expected was for him to come to you tonight. he maintained a mindful eye on you, swirling the whiskey in his glass. “think i need someone to show me around the place— someone pretty like you.” he voiced. his lips curled up into a smile; one that showed he was confident that he’d win a date with you.  

you thought carefully, picking a response that would be respectful for an employee to use. “sorry, i really can’t. work has me really busy right now.” your voice tipped higher out of habit. you hoped your tone was clear enough. 

your hopes were quick to be crushed. 

the man winked and went on to declare, “you wouldn’t have to work with a guy like me around.” he flipped the bottom of his patterned sleeve up, leaving the material bunched up his biceps as he shamelessly flexed his muscles to you. it was clear to you now how drunk the man was. you could see it in the way his smile hung bright and his eyes sparkled like the wish from a million suns. 

you didn’t even have time to react before a separate voice got added to the equation. another man, a younger one who seemed to be in his mid-20s, walked up to your section of the bar. 

“can you fight with those things?” the demeanor of the dark-haired man was intimidating alone, in addition to his alternate style of clothing and his sharp facial expression, he came off as different. the lanky man hovered over the wannabe cowboy, shadowing him. “because these look pretty—“ the younger man’s hand slipped out from his leather jacket and cupped over the older man’s flexing muscle. “fake.” 

“hey— hey don’t touch me you goth— emo freak!” the countryman jolted out from under the latter's touch before he could make any lasting contact. “what the fuck is wrong with you!” he shot his arms up in complaint. "werido." he waved his middle finger to the man as he continued to back onto the crowded dance floor. 

the second man remained stoic as he watched the first walk away. “fucking idoit. i’m not even close to being gothic.” he scoffed as his arms crossed over his chest. the sway in his movement told you that this customer wasn't necessarily sober either.

“another jerk.” you muttered, the words slipping out of your mouth before you could stop them. you didn’t want to complain, considering that this guy just helped get that creep away from you, but this was turning into a stereotypical ‘the good guy is actually a bad guy’ plot twist, and you weren’t in the mood to get kidnapped tonight. 

a hard exhale fell from the younger man’s mouth, “what was that?” he sounded amused like he wasn’t offended that you just insulted him, but he sounded intrigued.

you felt a wave of hot shutter through your body, cheeks flaring up specifically. your face scrunched up, shoulders raising and eyes widening as you silently cursed the way your body reacted to embarrassment. then again, some things never change. “nothing.” you said, just as quietly as you said your last sentence. your hand urgently tapped for the forgotten rag under the counter to no avail. 

you held eye contact with the man until his crystal-lit orbs suddenly flagged down. his forehead fell to his forearm, which rested on the bar's marble counter, and his shoulders began to shake as he hickered out a string of loud laughs. 

you were baffled. 

“they really hired a kid to work here?” the man giggled.

“actually, i’m—“ 

“so, this is what midnight's been doing.” his eyes were back up on you now, gaze observing as his hair folded out of its side part and in front of his face. he was quick to swipe his hair back up with his galaxy-toned hand. 

“sorry?” 

the man just barely stumbled back, gripping the back of the bar chair before he could be considered a threat. he settled himself down on the chair. his body leaning against the bar's wooden structure, the same way the cowboy had done a moment ago. but this time it felt separate— for so many reasons you couldn’t narrow it down to just one. 

he looked at you when he answered, pupils dilated. “hiring college kids.” his eyes flickered close for a moment like he was making a mental note to remember his observation. 

you bit your bottom lip. you can’t deny it because it’s true, you are a college student. but the way he said it made it seemproblematic. before you could tap into that, you felt that something was off— you couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was watching you.

you stole a glance and to your concern, a pair of eyes were focused on you from the threshold of the staff room. instinctively, your body straightened up. your focus decreased on entertaining the customer and increased on actually doing your job. 

unsure if you were in earshot, you spoke again, calculated. “midnight is a good place.” you said. your fingers finally found the rag under the counter and your hands got back into the routine of wiping the counter, really trying to sell the ‘i’m too busy working to talk’ act… again. 

“yeah?” the man dabbled, like he was quickly losing interest in the conversation. but he went on, “what makes it so special then?”

it was such a strange question, but you’ve heard stranger before. “they have a cool looking website…?” 

it was the first thing that came to mind. 

the man laughed, but it wasn’t as loud and amused as before, just convinced. he slapped a hand on the table, using it as his pillar of support as he staggered back up into a standing position. you could hear him whispering something about “technology” and “young hires” as he stumbled off. 

just one strange interaction after another. 

ninety laboring minutes later you’re finally on your way home. on a breezy, autumn day like this one you found yourself extra appreciative of the close distance of your apartment. you knew that your roommate, rumi, was probably awake. not because she was waiting for you, but because she’s a biology major and you’ve come to learn they never sleep. 

still, on nights when you were the only one closing or had to run a quick errand before going home, rumi would call you to ensure your safety— and threaten to call the police to escort you if you didn’t get home soon. 

tonight ended up being was one of those nights. 

you had just turned the corner right around midnight’s back alley when you heard a sound. what started as a small cough quickly turned into hacking coughs and eventually the sound of splatters of vomit hitting the ground. you, silently, peaked around the corner of the alley. 

hunched over in the l-shaped corner behind the dumpster was your “hero” from earlier. 

he looked more battered down now, knees quivering underneath his weight as he pressed his head up against the rugged brick wall. your feet lead you closer. as you appporached, you could see how his dark hair adhered damply around the nape of his neck and how desperately his hands clung onto the wall. 

“oh my god, you’re the guy from earlier.” you blurted out loud, mostly to verbally confirm it to yourself. the guy's head just lolled against the brick wall, tipping down as he threw up another liter of liquor onto the pavement. your face grimaced as you glanced away. “you’re really drunk.” you commented, fingers anxiously fiddling at your sides. 

“no fucking duh.” the man spat. he wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his leather jacket and then waved a flappy hand in your direction. “beat it.” he deadpanned, scratchy voice sending a chill up your spine. 

your mind now rushed with questions on whether you should leave him or not. you considered the factors. pro: he did save you from a potential creep. con: his attitude is intangibly rotten.

but there must be a reason behind it, right? like maybe he had a bad day— a lot of bar attendees do. the point was, even though you didn't know him, he did seem to have good intentions. 

you took a step toward him, “i’m gonna—“

“don’t.” his voice snapped into a growl, low and brisk, though you remained calm. you could see him peeking at you from under his arm, checking to see if you had left or not. searching like he had already anticipated you to be long gone.

when his gaze met yours— seeing you still in your work clothes, clearly very exhausted from your long trip, and still willing to help him —he couldn’t do anything else but glance away. 

slowly, you put a hand out. you could hear murmurs of keigo's voice in your head saying that you were “being too nice.” you shook his words off of your mind and pushed forward. “i’ll just walk you down the block.” you stepped under his propped up arm, swiftly redirecting his weight so he was leaned up against your left shoulder and had his arm wrapped around your right shoulder. you heard his breath hitch as you altered his position. he didn’t protest, but rather flowed with your direction.

you took a deep breath, stabilizing yourself. “nightlife is.. brighter down there. so you can find your way home by yourself.” you took a step forward, delicately nudging his side. he took the physical indication and moved forward, taking a slow, but sure step. you let out another slow breath; most times your last-minute plans didn’t work well so you you were satisfied.

a couple dozen steps later the young man spoke— well slurred —“thought all your bougie alcohol was fake.” he tone wasn’t confident like the words he had said weren’t originally his. he swayed a bit, the scent of an indistinguishable amount of various alcohols spiking through your nose. “stupid trust fund kid company.” he grumbled.

you didn’t blame him for the way he thought. midnight's popularity had shot up out of nowhere just a couple of weeks ago. you heard that they were doing so well in the market that other smaller businesses were shutting down because of it down. at the time you didn’t think much of it. you didn’t know that people were genuinely upset about it. 

after a long hushed walk in the eerie wind, you stepped upon the brightly lit street of the plaza. thought most the shops on this side of town consisted of sketchy dispensaries and personal businesses, it was still safer than leaving him behind the alley of a well-known bar with a high-kept reputation. 

you led him to one of the benches facing the oversight of city buildings. the sky twinkled in each of the visible window's reflection, sparkles jumping and dancing across city rooftops. when you let go of the man's weight, he immediately melted into the bench below him. you huffed out a strangled breath, swinging back on to dust your hands off. you could hear club music threatening to spill out of a building across the street from where you stood. you placed your hands on your hips and countered your breathing, slowing it down as a smile crept onto your face. 

the man sighed from his spot on the bench, catching your attention. “ya' ever looked at the sky?” the question was half asked, like it wasn’t even meant to be answered by you. you turned to him and sure enough, he was staring at the night sky, eyes hazy enough to certify him as dreaming. 

out of curiosity, you turn to the sky. orion had the type of beauty that you couldn’t describe. it was the type of city you’d see pictures of on the front of postcards, painted and perfect— perfectly feel good. 

you do look at the sky when you have time, which isn’t often. it’s nice to wish on the stars and share sprinkled false hope with other people across the world. you always wished for one day to feel exciting the way you were promised every day should feel. 

another comment cut you out of your tangled mind. “next meteor shower is march thirteenth.” the man whispered into the wind. you could see it in his eyes that his message wasn’t necessarily said to inform you but because he needed to say it—  he needed to tell someone. 

a vibrating sound coming from your pocket stopped you from being able to reply to the man's drunken speech. you pulled your phone out and read the contact name, rumi.

for her to be calling it must be super late. you stuffed your phone back into your pocket, “i’m sorry but i have to go!” you told the man frantically. his head just tilted more towards the sky, fully consumed in its beauty, already acting like you were gone. “well, get home safe!” you gave an awkward wave to him— well his back —as you skipped into a jog, running back home.

to your luck, the days only got more interesting.

previous masterlist next

“it’s good in the dark, good in the dark” | LCD soundsystem

comment to be added to current taglist: @peachesvault @tlissablr @evilari111

contains: swearing word count: 1.2k

“miller's on your ass today.” 

you sighed, your gaze flickering from the beautiful, authentic sun setting over the city’s buildings to the blazing, sun-colored dork next to you.  

“i mean really—“ he pulled out a gummy bear— from what seemed to be his never-ending side pocket stash —and stuffed it into his mouth. “you’d think the divorce would give the old bastard a revelation or something. but noooo, he’s still a bitch.” his confident gossip bubbled down into a dramatic murmur as he eventually shrugged his shoulders. 

you sighed again, head dropping into your hands as it throbbed, too sc

rambled to focus on keigo's deep interest in your manager's love life. “i need a job.”

“you have two.” keigo retorted as he moved to cross his arms. 

“i need another one.” you massage your temples before letting your hands fall to your sides. 

keigo scoffed. “you’re really not making enough?” 

“not if i don't want to be drowning in student debt for the rest of my life.” you complained. 

keigo pressed his lips together and scrunched his nose. it was the face he made when he wanted to argue on but knew better than to. the back of his head hit the brick wall behind you two as he too, stopped to a sigh. “well, i hear there’s a new club down the block. LOVE, or something?”

“love? like the word?” your voice peaked as you looked at him. 

keigo's fingers twirled around the string from his waist apron. “something like that.” the blonde's eyes fell to the sunset. yours followed them. “a couple of guys in my historical art class were talking about going.”

“the hippie—?” 

keigo cut you off before you could finish your comment  “my point is,” he leaned closer— most likely for dramatic effect, “they’re probably hiring.”

it was your turn to press your lips together now. 

“bartending isn’t that bad.” keigo coaxed. you almost laughed at how fast he was able to switch his opinion on this idea. but keigo kept his eyes on the sun, like he was thinking about his plans for the future too. a better future. “plus the tips make it so worth it.” he titled his head toward you, shooting you a sly grin. he nodded his head, ‘yeah?’, as he nudged your shoulder. 

your cold façade cracked into a warm smile. keigo always found a way to cheer you up. it was stupidly ironic. “i’ll apply when i get home.” 

“and you swear we aren’t friends.” keigo scoffed and you showed no mercy when shoving his shoulder. he just laughed loudly. “midnight is doing pretty nice though. the regulars are cute and who knows, maybe miller will consider giving us raises.”

a chortle escaped your throat. “yeah. like shit.” your lips didn’t remain curled up for long. your eyes faltered to a determined degree, your mind sharp on your goal. you had always tried your best to fight for yourself, nothing about that would change. nothing would change. a high tension that you didn’t even realize you had dropped from your shoulder like anchors. you were secure. you were safe. 

keigo kicked a rock at the ground, “my shift ends in thirty so i should head in.” he pointed back at the door. you nodded your head, giving him a small wave as he turned to go back into the bar. 

the orange and yellow kissed hue from the sun tinted your face. you didn’t think about how long it'll actually take you to pay off your tuition. you didn’t think about the piles of homework you'd have to do when you got home. you didn’t even think about how you’d last the last half of this twelve-hour shift. 

you just closed your eyes and focused on the sunshine’s delicate mark on your skin. 

just a block down the packed city was LOV, whose grand opening last saturday had a total of twenty-three arrivals.

“told you this was a shit idea.” a gravelly voice opined as he flicked fresh ash from the window sill and let it fall onto the dirted path outside.    

a low voice snarled in response, bony fingers typing away on his computer. 

“don’t know why the old man—“

“shut up.” tomura snapped. 

touya just grinned, “whats got your panties in a bunch, boss?” he shook his head in amusement, a stupid grin unreasonably placed on his lip. “you had high hopes or something?”

“shut the fuck up.” tomura eyes didn’t leave his screen, they only squinted as he muttered something to himself and his fingers swiped across the mouse pad of his laptop. 

“god— are you like, virtually wired to the internet or something?” touya trudged over to tomuras set up, finding a comfortable spot on the back of his chair to rest his forearm on and inspect what tomura was so fixated on. 

touya (surprisingly) was stunned.

“what the fuck is that?”

his laptop displayed a website page for a bar named moonlight. the layout was impressive alone; the backdrop flashed photos of a variety of very satisfied customers at the bar. an animation of a sparkling star shot across the top of the site, lighting up the bars boldly displayed name. and even—

“shit.” touya voice dropped to a whisper, mouth hanging dangerously close to tomuras ear. “look at that. they even got an interactive menu.” he disclosed, treating it as a cherry on top of moonlight's enormous advantaged cake. 

“how the fuck are these bougie ass motherfuckers packed every. single. fucking night.” tomuras finger tapped rhythmically against his desk, seemingly mindless, but touya took notice.

touya pulled away, crossing his arms as he leaned up against tomuras desk. “we could use some better advertising.” he shrugged— acting as if he wouldn’t take huge offense if his comment wasn’t taken into consideration. luckily, tomura could recognize touya's snotty tone for what it really meant and couldn’t be bothered to push it. 

“yeah.” he sighed, elbows falling onto his desk as his hands found themselves tangled into his sea of unbrushed hair. “when you learn how to code, come back to me with that.” he taunted through gritted teeth.

touya rolled his eyes, even though he knew tomura couldn’t see. “whatever. we can’t be in the slumps forever.” scarred hands reached for his phone as he pulled up the website on his own. his feet led him to the back door, hand reaching for his coat on the rack. 

tomuras head peaked up at the sound of touya fleeting feet. 

“and where the fuck are you going?”

“out.” touya dismissed, eyes still glued onto his phone screen as he typed in the directions from the website onto his map app. 

tomura huffed out a heavy breath when the back door slammed shut. he leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms and legs far before settling back into his— what he swears is —not-so-horribly crooked posture. “fucking hell.” he muttered.

eventually his finger fell back onto his keyboard, clacking sound blending into the background noise once more. 

touya sneered on the other side of the door. his gait was confident as he followed direction of the rising moon. 

masterlist next

“here it comes, here it comes” | LCD soundsystem

✷ tomura shigaraki x touya todoroki x reader series

✶⋆.˚ gn!reader | no quirk/modern au

↳ symbol guide | ⏾ written | ★ smau

after getting a bartending job at a busy downtown bar, you find yourself caught between two complicated men— childhood friends with messy pasts and even messier communication. what starts as curiosity slowly turns into something more personal. as your nights grow more tangled and your walls start to crack, you’re left questioning what you truly want— and who you’re becoming in the process.

─── ⋆⋅ chapter guide⋅⋆ ───

one — new moon ⏾

two — meteor shower ⏾

three — double exposure ⏾

more coming soon…

comment to be added to current taglist : @s6rine @peachesvault @tlissablr @evilari111

screaming crying throwing up and I will be thinking about it endlessly

dabihawks au at a fashion school (think maggie&bianca) where touya is the son of an esteemed designer who’s attended fashion weeks before he knew what they where and keigo is still a criminal’s son with the face of a model who’s always made his own clothes out of old stuff bc he didn’t have the money to buy new ones. one of them has the favour of teacher’s and model agents alike and it’s not touya. cue a rivalry based on mutual jealousy, both of them under the impression that the other had opportunities handed to them.

happy birthday to the pretty little pyro, Dabi!!

so if it's unclear i am in fact a queer

and i love shipping people (and ships too)

I am also in a bunch of different fandoms, which have their own ships

so I'm gonna share my master list of my OTP (one true pairing) here

MHA- Shigaraki-Dabi-Hawks

Monster high- Clawdeen-Draculara OR Kitty Noir-Venus Mcflytrap

Crush Crush- Karma-Sutra (basic ik but it's sooooo perfect), Luna-Cassie, Cassia-Myro,

Blush Blush- Poe-Cole

i will edit with any more fandoms i think of(12/21)

request more fandoms for me to add!!

HAPPY YEAR IF THE MIRUKO!

bunny time

They’re talking about their favorite things

they dancing

Endeavor: Physical Strength vs Emotional Strength

Or The Total Mess that is the Todoroki House.

*Note:  The following is not a defense of Endeavor nor is it excusing his actions.  It is a deep-dive analysis into the complexities and nuances of his behavior and how it affected his life and everyone else in that family based on observations I’ve made throughout the series. There are also comparisons with other objectively violent characters from other series.

Trigger Warning for domestic and child abuse.

...

We're gonna start out by looking at what happened to his character over the available time frame. Endeavor did not start out as a violent person to his family. We can see that in the flashbacks of the family's early days.

Starting here, note that he’s not cold toward Rei in this scene.  The way they’re walking around out here in the garden gives the impression that negotiations between him and Rei’s family are going well so far, but they’re out walking and talking in private just to make sure this arrangement is going to work and making sure further negotiation isn’t going to be a waste of everyone’s time.  I say this because if he was dead set on ice powers for this Quirk marriage, Rei probably wasn’t the only option.

It's also important to remember Rei did choose this. She chose for her family rather than herself, but it wasn't her parents' end all be all decision. (And maybe there was familial pressure on her side, but it's not explicitly stated in canon so exactly how much free will Rei actually had is up for interpretation.)

However what I think shows here is they weren’t really talking all that much. Specifically, he is not ‘talking down to her.’  He is not treating her with any particular disrespect or putting her down as inferior.   He doesn’t have the arrogance he later exhibits. This also isn’t him being aloof and ignoring her either.  Look at his face, specifically his eyes.  That is the same blank, deer in the headlights, “I have one brain cell dinging around in my head that is struggling to find a way to interact with people,” stare he shares with Shouto.

He has no idea what to say to her. 

So finally, Rei turns off to the side to admire the garden, and he asks, “Do you like the flowers?”  It’s a small thing, but it does show that in some capacity, he did show some interest in Rei and making her happy.  He’s just stupidly awkward about it at this point. (Even if his ultimate goal was…well, we’ll get into that.)

But this trait of never knowing what to say is a massive defining part of Endeavor’s character that has manifested in a myriad of disastrous ways throughout his entire arc.

Now I don’t think there’s enough shown about Endeavor and Rei’s relationship that we can conclusively say they ever loved each other at any point, but I do think they were, at the very least, cordial in the beginning.  They got along, they loved their children, and that in their minds was good enough for them. If you look at the scenes that are Touya and Fuyumi's early childhood, the family seems content. There's no sign of the abuse we see later.

The other big indicator that Endeavor was not originally a violent person to his family is the two very different ways he approaches training with Touya and Shouto. His motive for training them hasn't changed, but compared to the warmth and pride extended toward Touya we see in the above picture, Shouto’s experience with training in the second screenshot is harrowing and traumatic.

So why the difference?

A big reason is it has to do with age.  When Rei defends Shouto, telling her husband that, “He’s only five!” and Endeavor is still pushing their son to achieve the standards of an older child, yes, this does show his impatience. However, the other unspoken sentiment here is he himself is not getting any younger.  When Touya was born, Endeavor was twenty-two and had his whole life, career, and all his hopes with it ahead of him.  His kid has a greater Quirk than his, his legacy is secure, nothing to worry about.  But then they learn about the genetic issue with Touya’s Quirk.  He can’t use his fire safely, he’ll never be able to use it safely, and he will never be a hero in the way Endeavor can.

Touya:  Failure

Fuyumi:  Failure

Natsuo:  Failure

Shouto was probably viewed as his last chance.  Endeavor was getting older and running out of time.  If Shouto didn’t work out, then this legacy was dead in the water. At least, I hope Shouto was the last chance, otherwise he might've tried getting another kid out of Rei, divorced Rei and married someone else for the same reason, or attempted securing his successor through a grandchild.

Which is some freaky medieval way of thinking.

Anyone else getting Henry VIII vibes here?

Remember what I said about him never knowing what to say? The most obvious example of this is his complete and total inability to control the situation with Touya.

The tragedy of both Touya and Fuyumi's characters is they are the only two kids in the house who remember the happier childhood, and they both cling to that in their own way. It's why Fuyumi is so determined to 'fix things.' She's trying to regain the family they lost. For Natsuo and Shouto, things have always been bad in the house, hence why Natsuo bailed as soon as he could.

Then we have Touya. His flashbacks start with him at a toddler age. It is very common and normal for a child that young to prefer one parent over the other, but usually it's the parent they're most familiar with: The one that stays home with and takes care of them. Remember, to a toddler, everything is new and potentially scary, and that can also include a parent that is not always present: The parent that's working. In the Todoroki house, Endeavor has his career as a hero, so we have the indication that Rei was the parent who stayed home. In that situation, the probability of Rei being the 'familiar parent' was more likely, so for Touya to prefer his father over his mother shows just how close he was to Endeavor. Or because Fuyumi was the new baby and needed more attention, he could have gravitated away from Rei and gone to his father instead. He didn't see his father's ambitions for him. He didn't see that he was a successor as opposed to a son.

What he, through a child's innocence, saw and understood was that his father loved him and wanted to spend time with him.

Cue the genetic disparity of his Quirk: Where Endeavor failed as a parent was him never talking to Touya about what had happened. He didn't sit down with him and explain it wasn't safe for him to use his Quirk.

The My Hero world has a social problem of Quirks defining one's worth. It's not just the PLF's philosophy. Having no Quirk is viewed with pity and having a Quirk that can't be used could be viewed as a disability by this society, regardless of the fact it's completely possible to live a healthy life without having a Quirk. So Touya's 'issue' required compassion and understanding, especially from a parent. What Endeavor needed to say and what Touya needed to hear was, "This is a path that is blocked to you, it isn't your fault this happened, and I will love you regardless."

Instead, he just dropped him completely. (Given his character, I doubt he's even the one who broke the news to him.) In Touya's eyes, he didn't have the adult nuance to understand why he was being ignored; he just had the child innocence of, "I don't want to hang out with Mom and Fuyumi, I want to be with Dad. Why is he ignoring me? Why won't he train me anymore?"

What Touya learned from this is he only has value in his father's eyes as a hero. So he began training himself to be a hero because he was desperate to get that love and affection back. When Endeavor discovers the fact he's been training and burning himself, Touya never apologizes for disobeying him. He just repeatedly says variations of, "I can do this, then maybe you'll finally be proud of me."

Fuck, dude, just tell the poor kid you're already proud of him. That's all he needed to hear.

And Rei does call Touya out on this. She asks him, "Do you want to be a hero because you want to be a hero or are you doing this because it's what your father wants?"

In order words: "Are you doing this because you think it will make your father love you?"

And we come full circle to the 'death' of Touya where he realized, "I was never a son. I was a product."

...

Endeavor never addresses the problem going on under his roof. He handed the problem off to Rei. He didn't know what to say, he didn't know (and still doesn't) how to be a parent, and instead of confronting that lapse in his character, he instead made a coward's retreat back into the safe and familiar territory of being a hero.

This was the catalyst for his violence to his family.

Being a hero means fighting villains.

Fighting villains is often solving problems with violence.

Because he never knows what to say, he didn't know how to properly navigate a complex emotional situation, so he resorted to the only method he knew that worked:

Beat it into submission.

And since we have the previously mentioned signs they were once a happy, normal family, I have a feeling the violence began very suddenly and without warning.

...

To back this up, I'm gonna give a little personal insight here. I used to work in an orthopedic clinic and a lot of injuries that came through were hand injuries due to someone punching a wall out of anger/frustration.  You may think this is fine since they didn’t hit another person and only hurt themselves, but the issue with taking your aggression out on even an inanimate object is you are unwittingly training your brain to associate anger with violence and make it all the more likely for you to lash out violently against another person.

Throughout his career, Endeavor has conditioned himself into this same mindset of repeatedly forging and reinforcing the physical connection of violence with the mental/emotional connection of anger.

Look at this scene from Arcane.

If you haven't seen this series yet, 1.) Get on that. You're missing out. (Don't worry, there's not too many spoilers below.) and 2.) This is Vi and this screenshot is from a scene where she, in a moment of anger and grief, strikes her little sister hard enough in the face to knock her to the ground.

Look at the horror in her eyes when she realizes what she’s done.

Now before and after this moment, we see Vi undoubtedly loves her sister and would die for her. (Season 2 pending...) The first thing she does when they're reunited is hug her and tell her how sorry she is. But Vi has also been a fighter all her life. The sisters grew up in the rough part of town, they had to fight to survive, and they've experienced a violent atmosphere from a young age. We also see that when Vi gets frustrated or angry, she punches/slaps inanimate objects, so she too subconsciously associated violence with intense emotions, and in a moment of blind rage/grief, she failed to dissociate and she hurt her sister.

It wasn't a conscious decision, but it happened nonetheless.

What follows is she walks away from Powder. She doesn't go far, she just puts some distance between herself and her sister to calm down and process what's happened and hopefully find a way to move forward. Only, for unrelated reasons that don't pertain to this topic, she is apprehended by authorities and spends the next 6-7 years in prison, obsessing over her regrets and finding her way back to Powder.

She is never going to forgive herself for this.

I bring this scene up because as far as fiction is concerned, we as the audience do often excuse a character losing their temper and hitting a loved one once. What Vi did was not okay, but because it only happened that one time, nobody is labeling Vi as 'abusive.'

...

So consider the first time Endeavor hit Rei. We don't see it in canon, but with all the indicators of a relatively happy home, I believe that first act of violence was the culmination of these factors:

Endeavor's ongoing inferiority complex with All Might and the frustration in his inability to surpass him, and then projecting that frustration onto his family.

The career of solving problems with violence.

The subconscious association of anger with violence resulting from that career.

I'm also going to throw out the possibility of multiple head injuries incurred from his career playing a role. Traumatic brain injuries can and often do lead to behavioral changes where an individual has trouble managing emotional responses, experiences anxiety, has a shorter temper, etc.

Obviously, none of the above should be treated as excuses (not even the TBI possibility because there's therapy options for that), but they are potential contributors to the pivotal moment of frustration and impatience where Endeavor, like Vi, failed to dissociate and did something he couldn't take back.

Striking Rei is his tea kettle incident. Think back to the awkward moron who didn't have a clue what to say to her when they first met. That young man never thought he would do something like this. That first moment when he hit Rei, I really don't think it was a conscious decision and it may have taken him off guard as much as it did Rei. Like Vi, he probably acted out of blind anger and may have been just as horrified by what he'd done, and I can imagine Endeavor walking away from that to calm down and process that he crossed a line he thought he would never cross.

Unlike Vi, who was going to return to Powder after calming down so she could apologize, beg forgiveness, and move forward, Endeavor is an emotional coward who never knows what to say or how to confront a complex emotional hurtle. So he did the same thing he did with Touya: He retreated from the problem and pretended it didn't exist, and because it was never addressed and he was never held accountable, it only got worse. The lid was off and there was no getting it back on.

I'm not saying there was a definite chance he could have come back from that (that ball was in Rei's court as much as it was Powder's) but Endeavor had a choice:

He could have addressed what he'd done and made amends by submitting to whatever consequence Rei set down for him.

Or he could have rationalized his own twisted justifications for what he did.

He chose wrong.

For another comparison of the violence aspect, I’m also going to bring up Shizuo Heiwajima from Durarara!!, a character who I think flies off the handle far more frequently than Endeavor does.

If you haven't seen Durarara!!, same as above with Arcane.

The nuance of Shizuo is the intense rage he experiences, the violence that follows, and his own inner turmoil. He associates violence with anger, but these are traits that he fully recognizes as detrimental to himself and his personal relationships with other people. He has a temper, he gets violent, he lashes out with abnormal strength and has seriously injured many people.

But the people he's attacked are usually people who provoked him, whether it's thugs who opted to harass him on the street or he heard that a friend was in trouble and rushed off to help them. Not that violence is the answer, but they were people who arguably deserved a beating. More importantly, though, is the way Shizuo treats his relationships with caution. He's a loner by choice. He does want to connect with other people, but he keeps his distance because he legitimately fears harming someone he cares about. Because of his caution and self-awareness, he is a complicated and likable character that I think anyone with a short temper who has said or done things they regret can relate to.

If he didn’t have that level of control on himself and was violent with everyone regardless of who they were to him, he would be despised by the fandom as much as Endeavor is.

This is how Durarara!! can get away with presenting a violent character in a comedic fashion. Shizuo, despite his temper, is an absurdly strong guy, a little bit of an idiot, and fiercely loyal to his friends. All three of those are endearing qualities.

And in the right framing, Endeavor's violence is also presented as comedic.

This scene is funny, but grabbing Hawks like that and lifting him off the ground is technically assault and it is intimidation. Replace Hawks with Rei and this scene changes drastically from funny to very unsettling. Replace him with Touya and it's a fight.

...

Where Endeavor really differentiates from Vi and Shizuo is marked by two important factors:

Shizuo, for all his claims at being unable to control his anger, has it very much under control around the people he cares about. He really only lets loose against a perceived threat.

Vi mostly has that same control even though she lost it for a moment, but she was also separated from her sister in an indirect punishment for her actions.

Endeavor does not have Shizuo's restraint nor did he face any immediate consequences like Vi.

Which brings us to Rei.

I have mixed feelings when it comes to Rei, and the absolute harshest opinion I have of her is that she is pathetic and she failed her children. And I know that's a very black and white, cold-hearted view, but hear me out because it's a lot more complicated than that.

Endeavor is ultimately responsible for his own actions, but Rei also had the option to deal with the problem when it started. When he started hitting her, she could and should and have taken the kids and run as fast as she was able and not looked back. No amount of financial security, family appearance, or whatever justification one finds in this scenario is worth it. She should not have tolerated that abuse against herself and she definitely should not have subjected her children to that. While there's nothing conclusive to say Endeavor was physically harming any of the kids aside from Shouto, not fighting for her autonomy/safety was inadvertently teaching all four of them this is how men treat their wives, women are supposed to tolerate this treatment, and a marriage like this is 'normal.'

And in the end, she straight up abandoned her children. We see from Shouto's point of view right before she attacked him with the tea kettle. She's talking to her mother on the phone, saying she 'can't take it anymore' and she just wants to 'run away from this life.' Well...considering she goes on to spend the next ten years in a psych ward and left her children to her abusive husband...she did get what she wanted. Ten years and she really didn't put any more effort in trying to get back to them? She knew Endeavor was hurting her youngest. Going home and protecting her babies should have been her priority. For a long time, I legitimately thought she was in Fujiya because she was considered unsafe to rejoin society whether she was a danger to herself or to others. When she shows up in Endeavor's hospital room, I stared at the screen and thought, "The fuck? She could discharge herself at any point?"

All right, now that I've gone over my hard-line point of view, let me dial back the judgment and consider what else is going on here:

Rei is a refrigerated character.

She has very little characterization beyond her abuse and being the victimized mother in Shouto's story, so we don't know all that much about her. In all fairness, her oldest son suddenly dying while she was hospitalized certainly would have contributed to her downward spiral and account for her prolonged hospitalization.

She tolerated her abuse longer than she should have, but it is possible:

She learned that from her own parents. Tolerating abuse is often a byproduct of generational trauma. Maybe her father treated her mother the same way and she grew up thinking this was normal.

Maybe the first time Endeavor hit her, she rationalized it into a point of acceptance where she told herself that everything was fine and that it was only the 'one time' and it wouldn't happen again, a sentiment she kept repeating every time it happened.

Maybe she was raised to believe ‘the man of the house is always right,’ and that is a mindset that is hard to break if instilled from childhood.

Her parents certainly didn’t seem all that supportive with what was going on, but we also don’t know how much she told them. We don't even know if that one phone call she had with her mom was the first time she reached out for help after years of pretending everything was fine or if this was was something she was repeatedly updating her parents about and those parents chose to be aloof to it.

Maybe she really did grow up in a loving home and just didn't know what to do when confronted with the violent relationship she found herself in.

Maybe she was gaslit into believing it wasn't abuse.

Maybe she really did report the abuse and the godforsaken, root-of-all-evil Safety Commission told her, "Your husband's a hero. Stay quiet and don't ruin that public image." Basically told her to suck it up. That is also a possibility, and one I think could be the most likely, but the series doesn't really go into just how corrupt the Commission was, so we're in headcanon territory.

Maybe she did try to take the kids and run but failed to get away. (Unlikely since it’s never mentioned in canon.)

Not everyone is fortunate enough to have an upbringing that instills the belief, 'if your partner hurts you, they are dead to you' and not everyone has the good fortune of a reliable support network that can help them recognize a bad situation and get them out of it.

Given how well-known Endeavor is to the public, maybe Rei was afraid no one would believe her about the abuse. "A hero would never do such a thing. She's making it up for attention. Her family was poor, so she must be a gold-digger trying to screw over her hero husband in the divorce proceedings."

There is also the important fact that Japan has a social stigma against divorce. Persevering for the sake of family stability and maintaining an ideal appearance is a deeply ingrained cultural norm, which does introduce a troubling power imbalance between a husband who works and a housewife who doesn't have her own independent income. We also have to remember that Rei and her family were financially dependent on Endeavor, so she may have feared the monetary fallout at the prospect of leaving him. Also, with the popularity of the hero ranking system, the No. 2 Hero's wife divorcing him would have been very public and potentially humiliating for all involved.

And we can’t ignore the fact that Endeavor systematically broke her down into a shell of a person who couldn't see a way out of her situation and was tormented to the point she had a psychotic episode and attacked Shouto, the very child she tried to protect. And this too could have contributed to her prolonged hospitalization if this was the final straw and she viewed herself as a failure of a mother.

Maybe it was a combination of two or several of the above factors.

At the end of the day, abuse is a multi-faceted beast, and just as the abuse comes in many forms, the victim can have any number of reasons for staying in their situation.

So even though I have my harsh opinion of Rei and I think she should have done more to protect her children, I do 100% sympathize with her. She is a victim and she in no way deserved what she went through.

But while her inaction wasn't the cause of the crisis in her family, it was definitely a contributor to how badly it got out of hand because whatever the reason Rei didn't expose Endeavor or try to take the children and leave him, that lack of accountability opened up the opportunity for him to rationalize his own twisted justifications for his actions.  “It’s fine. She deserved it because ______. She was 'acting out.' She was overreacting. She doesn't know what she's talking about.”  Whatever he needed to tell himself to believe he didn’t do anything wrong even though he knew he wasn’t fooling himself or anyone.

She didn't stand up to him. Their children couldn't stand up to him.

So he continued the physical abuse unchecked.

...

Moving on into the redemption arc.

After the Kamino Incident, Endeavor finally, finally, finally got that vaunted No 1. Hero spot he'd been chasing for two decades. But he didn't earn it the way he wanted to by proving he's the best of the best. All Might retired, so he won by default.

And then he finds it's just one spot further up on a ranking system that means absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things. So he looks back at what's really important and he sees the charred skeleton frame of a house he burned down.

One institutionalized wife

One dead son

One daughter who clings to the memories of a happier home

One estranged son

One son who only has a use for him as a teacher and not a parent and will probably drop him the second he no longer needs him

In spite of everything, I do genuinely think the man deserves some credit for at least being willing to make an attempt at reconciliation. Not a lot since he dug that hole himself, but let's face it, a lot of lesser people would have looked at that mess and thought, "Fuck it, no going back now," and continued business as usual. So the question becomes:

Is Endeavor trying to redeem himself out of a need to make himself feel better about everything he's done or is he truly doing it for the benefit of the people he's hurt?

I tentatively think/hope could be a mix of both--I believe there is a part of him that cares about his children--but it definitely skews more toward making himself feel better because there's never a moment before the redemption arc begins where he's isolated, thinking back on everything, and just has the appropriate, "What have I done?" revelation. If his remorse was genuinely all about his family, we would have had that 'crying in the hospital scene' a whole lot sooner.

I think if Horikoshi wanted to portray Endeavor's redemption as genuine remorse for what he did to his family, I think he would have put more of a focus on Endeavor actually seeing the impact of what he'd done and feeling the inner turmoil and regret. Not just Natsuo's anger but also seeing firsthand Shouto's isolation and complete lack of social skills as a result of his training or having a conversation with Fuyumi where she admits she never wants to marry or have children because she doesn't 'want to risk ending up like Mom.' Seeing the effects of his behavior, realizing it's his fault.

So no. While there may be a part of Endeavor that loves his children (or he tells himself that he does), his wanting to atone is inspired mainly by his self-worth. He realized the ends did not justify the means and he tries to fix it.

But either way, how does he go about it?

The biggest change he makes toward earning forgiveness is to his hero career, which tracks with his character. That's familiar territory, so it's easier for him to navigate. He takes a significantly gentler method of teaching/mentorship with Shouto and he tries a kinder approach with his fans. That's progress, but it's still avoidance of the main issue that is the rift he caused with the other members of the family.

His relationship with Fuyumi doesn't have much friction. Fuyumi clings to their family's happier memories. With Touya gone, she was the only child who could remember a childhood without fighting parents, abuse, and suffering siblings. In a twisted way, this is something she and Touya have in common. So it makes sense that she would be the one who's the most receptive to Endeavor's attempts to be a better father. She sees this change as their best chance at being a normal family again. Like Touya, she wanted her father back.

Natsuo is different. He was 3-4 years old when the toxicity in their household really began to spike and when the violence started. Incidentally, this is also when memory cells in the brain start to fully develop and form concrete memories. Compared to his older siblings, the abuse is all he knows and that is why he's the child who left and went low-contact. The only thing Natsuo's really done wrong is start family drama when there's company over for dinner. I mean, c'mon. That's just rude. Don't do that in front of guests.

While Endeavor makes attempts to better his training methods/fan interaction, what he doesn't do is call a family meeting to discuss things, not that this would have resolved anything by a long shot, but it would have established a baseline of where everyone in the family was at and whether or not forgiveness was even on the table at all. It is an extremely arrogant thought for Endeavor to think forgiveness for something of this magnitude is possible, and if he wanted to seek forgiveness (or to atone, whatever the hell that means) for the lifelong mistreatment of family, he should have been more prepared for the most abject, humble groveling to the people he wronged that he could manage.

He should have admitted to his mistakes and faults, laid out everything he'd done wrong, apologize for that as best he could, then express he wanted to repair their relationship and be a family again while also acknowledging that he understands if that is not possible. Lay down that groundwork, maybe be open to family therapy so that a professional third party can act as a mediator and provide impartial guidance, figure out where the boundaries are, acknowledge he can't give them back their ruined childhoods but he can *insert anything Fuyumi, Natsuo, and Shouto ask as recompense, even if it's just leaving their lives forever*, and listen for once to what his family is saying.

Instead, he tries to have normal conversations with his children as if nothing bad ever happened. He offers to come watch Shouto's remedial training like that's a totally ordinary thing for him to do. He tells Natsuo during the family dinner that he would like to try his cooking some time. That is a good olive branch! There is nothing wrong with saying that, but without that prior baseline conversation, it comes off as contrived and that's how Natsuo interpreted it. He sends flowers to Rei, also a good signal to send, but he should have done the the uncomfortable thing and contacted her through her physician to see if she's open to meeting with him for a conversation or sending her a letter she could choose to open at any time (or send back unopened.) That would have established that same baseline and helped move forward towards the atonement he wanted.

But he does the same thing he always does: He pretends the real issue just doesn't exist and he tries to control the situation to suit him.

Why?

Say it with me: He never knows what to say! He can't navigate complex emotions!

He doesn't try to find out if his family is even willing to forgive him, frankly because he's an emotional coward who doesn't want to hear the answer.

However, we cannot say he has no character development at all.

There is one thing worth noting around this point in the plot that I think is important to recognize. If Endeavor ever had any character development that was in favor of his redemption, it was when Natsuo was kidnapped and nearly killed, and it's not because he ran and hugged him in the street.

In this scene, he admits to Natsuo that his actions might as well have killed Touya.

This is a small thing, but it's also huge because you have to consider that up until this time, Endeavor has been gaslighting himself into believing it was Touya's fault for getting himself killed or Rei's fault for not doing as she was told and watching him. He could even have been irrationally blaming All Might for just being a barrier to his goals. Any warped excuse and justification he could think of to escape the blame.

It's not a lot, but he did finally give voice to the guilt that he is the reason he failed and his child died. He finally acknowledged that the blame lies squarely with him and no one else, and acknowledging he drove Touya to his own death means way more than just talking about his intentions to atone.

He took accountability here, at least within the family.

That is one point he's earned. We as the audience can begrudgingly concede that one.

But this progress is again stalled when Endeavor makes the decision that it would be best for his family if he distances himself from them. He chooses to build another house for them where they can all live together with their mother and away from his shadow.

The initial reaction I had to this decision was, "Okay, your solution is kicking them out of the only home they've ever known?" But then I considered that having those kids leave a house where they lived through a traumatic and stressful childhood was a good call. Natsuo already bailed, after all. And then there's Fuyumi... Yeah, you know what, maybe a conversation would have been appropriate here. Instead of finding out what they want, he goes and decides it for them like he always does.

Touya has a genetic disparity that prevents him from using his Quirk safely? Endeavor decides he shouldn't be a hero, disregarding any possibility of finding a potential workaround.

Shouto finally uses his fire at the Sports Festival? Endeavor has his whole speech that pretty much shows he has Shouto's entire life planned out after graduation.

He wants to do what's best for his family? He decides what's best for them.

And we're back to the big dumbass never knowing what to say and still running away from the main issue by making assumptions and decisions without actually considering the thoughts/opinions of the people around him and controlling the situation to his benefit.

He may have his intention to do better, but he has no idea what he's doing. He doesn't know how to relinquish his authority role.

And then we have Touya with his, "Bitch, you thought!" grenade. Or is it a nuke?

It's important to note is that failure to articulate emotion in a healthy way is a trait that is shared by all of the Todoroki family members.

Endeavor - the emotional coward who resorts to violence when confronted with an uncomfortable situation

Rei - the passive mother

Fuyumi - the peacekeeper and people-pleaser

Shouto - the child who was systematically deprogramed into an angry husk imitating his father that he has only recently started to recover from

Touya and Natsuo are the only two who actually have some pushback against the bullshit in their family. Touya's a whole kettle of insane fish who's warped psyche deserves a character analysis of its own, but the point is, even as a kid, he doesn't creep around his father or try to make peace with him. Natsuo also has no problem calling out Endeavor for everything that went wrong in his childhood, plus he moved out and went to college as soon as he could.

Touya - the unstable sociopath who shares his father's tendency to violently lash out while stuck with the mental fragility of his mother

Natsuo - the traumatized avoidant

Neither of them have a functional way of dealing with their issues. (In fact, Touya is so unhinged about it that the door has peaced out and is halfway down the street.)

Endeavor wanted to atone for what he did...by burying and not actually taking any real accountability until the unavoidable moment Touya is screaming down to him, "Is it because you became No. 1 that you finally paid attention to your family?"

Touya has a warped view of the world brought on by years of trauma, but he hit the nail on the head.

Endeavor's main motivation for atonement is for the self-satisfaction.

So we have the symbolism of Endeavor, who has always used his physical strength to solve his problems by beating them into submission and used his intimidating height to glare down at everyone beneath him, and then we have Touya standing on top of a mountain, shouting down. Endeavor's in a position where he's looking up at his dead child, who is arguably the broken bough, elephant in the room, core unavoidable reason a full atonement was never going to be possible, bringing about a twenty-year overdue reckoning.

And he once again doesn't know what to say.

As the story ends, this is where we leave him: Crippled, looking up at his dying child, and confronted by one of the lives he ruined. By choice, he's going to sit here and face what he did. These talks are not going to be pleasant. I doubt Touya is so burned out and exhausted that he doesn’t have the heart to spit out more of the lifetime of vitriol he’s built up.

I know a lot of fans were disappointed Horikoshi didn’t kill Endeavor off in the end, but I personally prefer to look at it this way:

Some characters deserve death.

But some deserve to live in despair.

...

To revisit Arcane, I think this quote neatly sums up Endeavor.

Natsuo is more like his father than he wants to admit...and it is both tragic and unsettling.

He does what he wants without regard for what the people around him want.

Sure, he'll go along with certain requests, like going to the family dinner because Fuyumi asked him to.

However, rather than be a polite host, he decides he'd rather embarrass his sister by being angry at their father all through said dinner and making things awkward for their guests. He didn't have to be there. Whoever he's talking to on the phone after the fact, maybe the girlfriend, he apologizes for bailing on their plans. He didn't even have to white-lie to Fuyumi. He straight up had other plans that night. So there are two ways you could look at this:

He conceded to a request to support his sister...then half-assed it.

Or he canceled his plans and went out of his way to be a prick.

He's not wrong for hating his father, that is 100% a normal reaction to an abusive parent, but he is wrong for not establishing his own concrete boundaries or respecting Fuyumi's.

Like Endeavor, Natsuo is pretty isolated within the family.

Mom’s out of the picture and contact with her is limited.

We all know what his relationship with his father is like.

His closest sibling 'died' when they were kids, but even then, Touya and Natsuo's relationship wasn't a good one. We know Touya spent years trauma-dumping on Natsuo, and little bro took it like a champ. Supporting one's siblings like that is admirable, but it does highlight a key difference between the brothers. Touya has memories of a happy childhood with their father. Natsuo does not. So he had to listen to his older brother crying for a past he knows nothing about, which had to have brought on a little resentment. "At least Dad loved you once. I never even got that much."

As stated above, Natsuo doesn't see eye to eye with Fuyumi. At least not enough that he respects her decision to forgive their father. Whether he supports that decision or not, he should love his sister more than he hates their father, and starting shit unprovoked over a dinner she asked him to be at is not a supportive decision.

His relationship with Shouto is hard to gauge. They were raised apart, sure, but they lived in the same house. So the fact that he didn't know Shouto's favorite food until he was fifteen is...odd. Natsuo never tried to have a conversation with him in passing? But I have a theory about that. With how Shouto behaved in the very beginning of the series, the mirror-image of their arrogant father, I think Natsuo had a, “Fuck, now there’s two of them," moment and actively avoided association with his younger brother. This may have contributed to him moving out even though he attends a college that's close enough that that he can casually stop by for dinner.

He Actually Does Get Violent.

Not with other people, thankfully, but he does slam his fist against the door in this scene, which is an act of aggression.

This makes for an intense moment in animation, sure, but if you saw a person do this in real life, you’d be nervous about where that fist is going next.

I already went over this in the Endeavor analysis that I made a few months back, but the gist of it is taking out your anger on inanimate objects is unhealthy because you're training your brain to associate anger with violence, which has the potential to make it harder to dissociate in the long run.

In his own way, he did abandon his family.

Fuyumi tells him to leave the family circumstances to her....and he just left her to it? She went to college to become a teacher and made a career work in spite of living in a volatile home. The series doesn't say where Natsuo is a student at, but he clearly lives close enough to home that he can drop by for a visit, so it's not like he went to some prestigious university out of town.

So yeah. Left his remaining brother and sister to their father.

The other point, though, is he's canonically studying medical welfare.

Medical welfare is the consideration of patient wellbeing, preserving individual dignity, promoting quality of life, and taking a holistic approach to healthcare that applies mental and emotional care to a patient, not just physical.

So it's ironic this is where his brother ends up and he says absolutely nothing about it. Nothing about promising to come see him, nothing about asking the staff if this really the best arrangement they could come up with, no promises to Touya that he'll figure something out. He just ghosts and, like their father, that is really hypocritical.

In the end, he puts his own hate and feelings above everyone else’s.

This one's pretty closely related to my first point, but it does bear reiterating for the finale. Natsuo's decision to never see his father again is ultimately going to hurt his family more than it's going to spite Endeavor.  Going no-contact is a healthy choice and I don’t fault him for it at all.  But if he sticks to it, it’s going to lead to some serious ramifications down the road.

If he's strict enough to refuse to be in the same vicinity as Endeavor:

He won’t attend Touya’s funeral and support his grieving mother and siblings if Endeavor will be there.

Since we see in the epilogue Rei stays with Endeavor, Natsuo visiting her is going to be complicated.

If Fuyumi gets married, she might want her father at the wedding. Is Natsuo going to skip his sister’s wedding out of spite?

If Shouto gets married and decides to let their father be there, same story.

If Endeavor outlives Rei, will Natsuo miss her funeral?

And finally, Natsuo might have to come to terms with the fact his own children may want to meet their grandfather, which is a decision he can only control until they’re legal adults.  He can tell them how much of a monster Endeavor was all he wants, but those kids may still be curious about meeting the man in person, especially if they hear stories from other family members and know the former No. 2 and No. 1 is their grandfather.

I’m not saying Natsuo should forgive Endeavor, or even stop being angry with him because he has every right to his anger. But if he still wants a relationship with the rest of the family, he is going to have to exercise some form of compromise.  Especially with his children because he unfortunately has all the hallmarks to become the next Kotaro Shimura. This is a society where kids want to be heroes, and then there's Natsuo who has a history with the dark side of hero society, no matter the good Shouto does.

tell me then, how will it be, me without you?

Omg i don’t know if you already have an idea for what to do.. but if you don’t yet could you make Dabi a winged dragon like creature for Dekus creature chronicles? your art is so amazing and i’ve always loved the dragon dabi aus and i’m curious to see your take on it. if not that’s totally okay i’m sure i’ll love it no matter what you think of since i’ve loved everything so far the details are so amazing 🥹💕

This is very sweet- I am afraid I'm not in the fandom to be familiar with AUs, but dragons are always a favorite pick amongst reimaginings. There happens to be only one true dragon in this particular story... but I can show you the Todoroki's now that I have them finished- (I plotted them as a unit)

You can learn a little more of the myths under the cut if you like :)

part 9! Nav: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8

tidbits under cut

Dabi was the lynchpin design-and his family was built around him! They are all creatures of reincarnation, but with various meanings-

Canon Touya threw around some strong words about being reborn. The way he seems mentally stuck to his childhood, felt like a Phoenix who can't (or perhaps won't) allow himself to grow beyond a certain point, doomed to repeat his self-destruction. Like the other villains though - he's a little more morally grey in this story.

Firebird (Slavic) are often harbingers of either good fortune, doom- or unattainable goals in their tales. If that doesn't sound like Endeavor I'm not sure what does. They differ from phoenix in which they are 'always on fire', but they don't self immolate - they're just 'built like that'.

Tsurara onna (icicle woman) are created from the loneliness of single men during the winter time. When a man gazes longingly at a strong, beautiful icicle, they may appear. They disappear in the summer, and may reappear in winter. The love stories invariably end in tragedy. Considering Rei's dynamic to Enji, it felt fitting.

A Snegurochka (Russian- Snow Maiden) the fairytales often echo tsurara onna, of maiden that melts due to "shenanigans" (not always tied to love stories). 

Simurgh (Persian) is more of a reach - you can really dive into their different lore and variations, but they are similar to phoenix in which they also immolate to reincarnate after a very long time. They have connections to both fire and water.

There's no myth creature equivalent of both fire and ice. Yet in canon, Shoto is the only one who doesn't provide himself a hero title. His name is his identity. So- he's the only "undefined" creature. There's a number of myths you could read him as if you wanted (he doesn't care).

... Dabi's pheonix fire also plays into forming the character Juzo (Not that anyone asked- this is reaaaaaaaallly reaching into the semantics on the yliaster, or prima materia that forms the philosophers stone- which mentions pheonix fire purification as a metaphor... ah don't worry about it).

Gashadokuro's are the scariest creature I could think of for a nomu.

Happy Birthday, Enji

Fanart by PH6y0

touya's dance

The smile that was supposed to be there.

Can't go back

久しぶりにヒロアカの絵