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Hii ! I was hoping you could do Logan x Reader where all the teachers go to a club, and the Reader starts dancing with Storm and Jean while Logan is sitting on a couch, looking at her. They both have a crush on each other, but they don't know it, so when the Reader notices Logan staring at her, she gets shy and decides to go get a drink. When she got her drink, a guy starts flirting with her, and Logan obviously sees it. he gets jealous and walks up to the guy telling him to leave her alone. After they talk for a bit, the Reader accidentally confesses and Logan kisses her. this ends up in a private room with Logan fucking her as he always wanted. I know this is a long request and I'm sorry for that, bue I'm a writer myself, so I already had develop this bit of the story in my head. I completely understand if you don't want to do it. Hope you have an awesome day !!đ€â€ïž Love your writing btw
a/n: I loved this prompt so much, did switch it up a bit bc I faced a bit of writer's block trying to flesh this out!! (and if I said I was listening to Thong Song while writing this, what then?)
18+ MDNI (fucking in a club bathroom, if that's not your thing, move on out)
Logan rummages around somewhere behind you, digging through the cabinets and moving everything around. The longer he searches, the more confused you grow. Your brows furrow as he cusses to himself.
Thereâs a low grunt of frustration as Logan rounds the kitchen island to glare at you. His face is screwed up in anger that seems to be misdirected towards you. You give him an awkward look, âUh, hi?â
âHe stole my booze,â he responds shortly and without explanation. You shake your head in confusion as the dots slowly connect. A small smile curls up on your lips but the glare he gives you makes it quickly drop.Â
âWell, you know Charles' rules about it,â you tell him flippantly. Logan huffs and shoves away from the counter. He turns back to the fridge, destroying the organizational system as he continues his search. You roll your eyes, eating your food and watching him with a bored expression.Â
Jean walks just as he really begins to work himself up. Her face pinches in distaste, catching on to the root of his anger quicker than you had. She looks at you with a small smirk. âCharles?â
âYep," You answer, eyes still trained on him. He finally gives up the futile search, moving to stand beside you. Your eyes widen and you try not to physically react to his proximity. Itâs an everyday struggle to remain calm around him. Youâre desperately trying to keep a cool girl persona but you donât think it's working.Â
Youâre pretty sure he sees right through your pathetic attempts at nonchalance every time you two are paired on a mission. Jean notices the look on your face and smiles slightly. âThe rest of us are thinking of going out tonight.â
It's not an offer with her, more of a demand for the two least sociable members of the team. She gives you both expectant looks, ignoring the way you minutely shake your head in disapproval at the idea of going out.
âPass,â Logan grunts. He steps away from you, making for the kitchen door. Jean quickly steps in front of him, firmly placing her hand on his chest and giving him a stern look.
You feel like you're missing something as they silently converse with tense looks and aggressive eye motions towards you. You might be worried they're flirting if it weren't for how fed up they both look right now with one another.
Your brows furrow in confusion and it only worsens when Logan lets out an aggrieved huff. âFine. Iâll come.â He gives Jean a thin smile, âHappy?âÂ
She releases him and moves out of the way with a smug look. âVery. Youâll thank me, by the way.â She says to his retreating back, ignoring whatever he mutters back to her.
Youâre completely lost about what that was but don't have much time to process it before Jean turns her attention to you. You already know what she wants and you immediately shake your head. âNo, nope, you know I donât like going out.â Jean smiles at you, but you know sheâs just pretending to agree with you.Â
âJean,â your voice is sharp as you glare at her. âNot happening.â
You really regret ever befriending her. Sheâs either ridiculously persuasive or she's used her mind-warping abilities on you.
You're squished between Ororo and Logan on a sticky club booth. The smell of booze and cheap perfume soaks through your senses. You feel the beginnings of a headache forming as the music pounds.
While you love the feeling of Logan's biceps pushed up against you, you hate the club more. Storm catches the tense look on your face and sighs in disappointment.
"We need to get some more alcohol in you," she tells you with a faux sense of authority. "Come on," she nods her head and for a moment you think she's talking to you. But, with a move that seems practiced, Scott and Jean both follow her out of the booth and head toward the bar.
You watch them go with a suspicious glint in your eye, not trusting how smoothly they all just conveniently slipped away. That leaves just you and Logan behind at the table and you doubt that's coincidental.
They've been a little pushy about this crush of yours ever since they found out. They insist that he feels the same way about you as you do him. But you sincerely doubt he's fantasizing about going on romantic picnics with you and thinking of mushy dates.
He seems like the kind of guy to value silence over a girlfriend and you doubt you're his type. You don't tend to stray from the rules, ever. You don't think there's much you two have in common, as much as the others insist the opposite.
You give him a subtle look over. He hasn't moved away from you, which seems like a good sign. There's plenty of space for him to go now, but he keeps himself pressed up against you.
But, he's also not looking at you. His thumb is idly tracing the rim of his glass and he's refusing to take his eyes off the stained wood of the table. You know he can feel the way you're staring at him, but he's stubbornly refusing to acknowledge your presence. It almost feels petty and that makes you scoff and roll your eyes at the thought. You doubt Logan cares enough to be petty.
Practically in love with me, you think sarcastically.Â
You know your friends are taking longer than necessary at the bar, trying to give the two of you some privacy. You feel like a high school girl, trying to get the cool guy to like her when he literally couldnât give two shits.Â
Your friends being pushy about the two of you really isn't helping anything. It only gives you false hope, and when he's inevitably a jerk again, it just makes all your little fantasies come crashing down.
You pick up your glass, tipping your head back and letting the alcohol warm you from the inside out. You've done your hair, spent forever doing your makeup, and you put on your favorite slutty dress. You don't feel like sitting here all night sulking alongside your unrequited crush.
More often than not, Logan is nothing more than a wet blanket. You've put in the effort and dragged yourself outside for once, you'd like to enjoy the experience. He could come find you when he felt like pulling the stick out of his ass. You slide out of the booth with a huff, uncaring as the hem of your dress rolls up your thighs.Â
âWhereâre you going?â Logan demands, voice gruff. Now he wants to pay attention, figures.Â
You turn around and glare down at him. His eyes rove slowly over you, the way they should have been all night. His gaze is a physical caress and his stare lingers along your body. You can practically feel his touch on the curves of your hips. Slowly, he looks back up to meet your eye, something like a challenge on his face.Â
You assess him, raising a brow and shrugging. âIâm gonna dance.â Something has possessed you or thereâs a very talented telepath manipulating you right now. In a rare display of confidence you lean over the table, breasts pushed out towards him. âWanna join me?â You ask, breath barely above a whisper.Â
He scoffs and goes back to glaring at the table. Whatever confidence you had settles coldly in the bottom of your gut. âNot my thing, kid,â he gripes, every bit the crotchety old man.Â
You roll your eyes, playing off the sting of rejection as an annoyance. âOf course, youâre not. Youâre not having fun unless everyone else is miserable,â you snap. His eyes shoot up to meet yours, something like shock playing on his face.Â
You donât let him respond, already turning on your heel and walking off. As much as you like Logan, sometimes this attitude of his becomes tiring. Whatâs wrong with wanting to have fun for a night?
Youâre not usually a huge fan of clubs. But when youâre out with your friends, youâre not going to actively ruin their night. As rude as that was, itâs right. Heâs the âcoolâ kid in high school who thought everything was lame and never wanted to enjoy anything.Â
So, what? You like to get a little drunk and sloppy sometimes, maybe if he ever tried it he might be less miserable. You head towards the bar, spotting Ororoâs hair easily through the crowd. You slide behind her, slipping your arm over her shoulder, âHey pretty,â you whisper in her ear, laughing as she jumps.Â
She turns and glares at you, swatting at your shoulder. âYouâre lucky I didnât hurt you.â
âOoh, save it for later.â She rolls her eyes and passes you a shot. You take it with a smile, wincing at the burn of the tequila. âYou wanna dance?â You have to shout to be heard over the music but you know she hears you when her eyes widen in surprise.Â
She glances behind you and you donât have to look to know Logan is glaring daggers at your back. You can feel him and it's pissing you off. âWhat happened?â You know she can tell something is up, youâre never this outgoing when you go out. But you donât want to talk about finally coming to terms with the fact that you and Logan arenât going to work out.Â
Instead, you hold your hand out and wink. âWanna dance or not?â She laughs a little, slipping her palm into yours and letting you drag her out onto the dance floor. Itâs been a while since youâve actually been sober dancing. You usually like to be near blackout drunk, but you just donât have the energy for that tonight.Â
Ororo is a little tipsier than you, clearly having been drinking while she was waiting at the bar. Her inhibitions are looser and sheâs giggling as you move your hips against hers. Neither of you is dancing to impress, youâre messily moving around each other to the beat of the music. You donât pay attention to the people around you, just having fun by yourselves.Â
Ororo takes your hand, spinning you a little and pulling you back into her arms. You laugh, swaying your hips to the same rhythm she is, chests pressed tightly together while you smile at each other.Â
She only lasts a few songs before she pulls back. âI need a drink,â she yells before stumbling back towards the bar. You feel yourself deflate, not sure what to do with yourself now that your favorite dancing partner has ditched you.Â
You look through the mass of grinding bodies and try and spot your table. You canât see much through the brightly colored lights spinning all around you. Everythingâs a little disorienting and the shots youâve had arenât helping.Â
Someoneâs hand slips around your waist, âYour friend left you all alone?â Normally, youâd push whoever it was off and tell them to back off. But heâs got an attractive voice and you can feel how fit he is against your back.Â
âYou gonna keep me company?â You tease, voice a low purr as you push back against him. Your hands drift down to his arms, pulling them a little tighter around your waist. He chuckles, the noise reverberating through your back.Â
You barely even get a chance to dance before your back is cold and you can feel his arms forcibly ripped off you. It doesnât take much digging to find the culprit. Logan is behind you, hand fisted in the guyâs collar, âWhy donât you back off, bub?â He shoves him back and you roll your eyes as the guy scrambles off.Â
âWhat the hell was that?â You demand arms crossed as you glare at Logan.Â
He turns around and youâre surprised at the intensity of his glare. Something about it has you heated for an entirely different reason. Heâs staring down at you like heâs gonna pounce on you. Your heart races, thighs clenching the longer heâs glowering at you.Â
He shouldnât be allowed to be so attractive when heâs pissed off. He reaches forward, grabbing your bicep and jerking you into his chest. He leans down until his lips are brushing against your ear. âYou wanna dance, letâs dance, kid.â
âWhat-â
He cuts you off, flipping you around and pulling your back flush against him. You can feel just how much your little show with Storm got him going. You truly werenât doing anything too alluring, but it seems to be enough for him.Â
When you donât move his hands drop to your hips and he grinds them down against him. âLogan,â you gasp his name out, caught off guard by how brazen heâs being in the middle of the club. There are people around you doing much worse but youâve never known him to be this bold before.Â
âYou trying to make me jealous?â Itâs hard to pay attention to what heâs saying, to focus on anything at all when his hand is drifting steadily down your body. The tips of his fingers just barely brush the skin of your thigh while his thumb lets the hem of your dress curl up.Â
He flips you around, taking his hands off of you and instead tilting your chin up to face him. âI said,â he repeats in a condescending tone, âwere you trying to make me jealous?â He doesnât sound like heâs taking you seriously. Even if that was your intention, he thinks itâs just your petty way of lashing out at him for not dancing.Â
You narrow your eyes at him and swat his hands off of you. âNo. I wasnât trying to make you jealous. I was trying to have some fun since youâre clearly not interested at all.â
That insufferable smirk of his doesnât go away for a minute. If anything, heâs more incensed by your anger. âWho said I wasnât interested?â Your lips part, another dumb little noise about to slip out when he dips down and stops you.Â
Heâs not trying to be subtle at all, gripping your dress and tugging you up against him while your lips lock. His tongue dips briefly into your mouth, savoring the taste of tequila on your gums before he pulls back.Â
âIâm interested in you, kid, just not this shitty little club.â Your mouth is gaping and you feel like a fool, standing there and just staring at him. Your brain is completely scrambled, bits and pieces forming together to scream that he kissed you. Too many things are happening at once. The music is making the floor beneath you vibrate, liquor is warming you from the inside out and tilting you closer to him. And he kissed you. Your lips are still tingling from it.Â
He chuckles a little under his breath, keeping you moving steadily against him. Youâre simply something to be puppeteered by your desire for him. No thoughts linger inside your brain except his name. âYouâre interested in me?â You repeat dumbly.
He leans down, tilting his lips closer towards your ear. âYou canât feel how much I want you?â One of your thighs is practically draped over his leg and heâs grinding his hips against you. The only thing you can feel is him. The smell of his cologne overpowers all the bodies surrounding you both, his voice drones out the loud music around you. Youâre completely consumed by him.Â
âLogan,â your tone is scandalized, you canât believe heâs bold enough to have you nearly half-naked on his lap right now. Your butt is one wrong move away from being the clubâs newest attraction. Yet, despite every protest lingering on your tongue, you canât do anything except kiss him again.Â
You donât know if the moment is all one vivid wet dream your brain has conjured up at three am and you donât feel like finding out. You want to enjoy being risky for once. You always play everything so safely. You donât confess your feelings to Logan so you arenât rejected. You never break the rules, you never act out. Just once, you want to do something bad and enjoy it.Â
Your arms twine around his neck and you tilt your head to deepen the kiss further. You feel his reaction more than you hear it. A low grumble in his chest that has you practically vibrating with want. He pulls away from you first and it takes a moment for your eyes to flutter back open.Â
When you finally do meet his gaze again, heâs got nothing but a smoldering desire in his eyes that makes you want to melt. Heâs staring you down like youâre prey to be chased and consumed. âCanât do this here,â he mutters.Â
Youâre almost shocked that heâs the first one to cut this off. You knew it was going to happen, you canât exactly fuck in the middle of the dance floor. As much as you might want to. But you thought you would be the one to chicken out.Â
He grabs your hand and shoves through the throng of grinding bodies. You grab the back of his shirt, stumbling after him and trying to stay close. âAs much as Iâd like to make that poor son of a bitch watch me fuck you, we need a little more privacy.â
It takes you a moment to realize heâs talking about the man youâd danced with earlier. If you could even qualify that as dancing. Heâd barely put his hand on your waist before Logan had appeared out of nowhere.
Your eyes narrow in suspicion and you glare at his back. How had he even gotten to you so quickly? He must have been watching you like a creep the whole time. You almost want to laugh at the thought. But youâre distracted by him nudging you through a door and locking it behind you.Â
You glance around, spotting three sinks and some cracked mirrors. Toilet stalls linger to your right and your nose wrinkles in disgust. You turn around to complain but heâs already stalking toward you. Whatever sanitary complaints were lingering in the back of your throat are thrown out the sealed bathroom window.Â
He buries his hands in your hair, ruining the meticulously placed style. You arch into his hold, opening your mouth for him to explore and gasping as his hand drops to your hips. He tugs you closer, ripping your dress up and yanking your underwear down in one smooth move.Â
You barely have a second to process half of whatâs happening before heâs got you bent over the sink. Itâs all happening so fast, so many different desires of yours surging to the surface in one dingy club bathroom.Â
Youâre slick with months of fantasies and sleepless nights where not even your vibrator could curb your desire for him. You hear his belt clink behind you and your back arches like a cat in heat. You practically present yourself to him, so desperate to feel him that you donât care how much of a slut youâre being.Â
You know, if this was anyone else, youâd slap them for even suggesting the bathroom as the first place you have sex. But youâd have let Logan take you in the alley behind the club. You donât care where you are, just so long as it's with him. And you know that desire runs a bit deeper than just a surface-level crush.Â
He doesnât give you much warning as he thrusts into you. The breath is practically punched out of you as he fills you. Everything about it feels right. Youâre so full of him you feel like you could explode. You know itâs going to take a pathetically short time for you to come. Itâs just too much, too fast, youâre so overwhelmed by him.Â
âOh god, Logan,â the porcelain creaks under your palms before you feel it splintering off into your skin. You canât pay attention to it, though, jaw agape, capable of nothing more than slutty moans of his name.Â
Heâs relentless behind you, thrusting so hard inside you that it feels like a punishment. He fists his hand in your hair and forces you to look in the mirror. âCome on, want you to see how wrecked you are. What a fucking slut youâre being for me, letting me fuck you like this in this bar.â
Your mascara is completely ruined, streaked down your face with your lipstick smeared across your chin. You look like a fucking mess and you couldnât care less. You feel yourself fluttering around him the tighter his grip on you is. His hand slips from your hair, latching around your neck and tugging you into his chest.Â
He grips your chin and keeps your eyes on where the two of you are joined in the mirror. It only makes you clench tighter around him, watching as he moves in and out of you. You can see just how much of an effect you're having on him and itâs the biggest ego boost youâve ever had in your life.Â
Youâve reduced him to a mess in a dirty club bathroom, so desperate for you he couldnât even wait to take you home. He tilts his hips, hitting the spot inside you that has your eyes nearly rolling in the back of your head.
You whisper his name in warning, letting go of the sink to clutch tightly at his wrist. He wraps his arm around your waist, keeping you secured against him. His hips start to stutter, losing some of their rhythm the tighter you are around him. The feeling builds in your fingers, tingles down to the tips of your toes, and explodes in a nearly blinding pleasure. His hips are still against you, warmth filling you a moment later.Â
You would slump forward into the sink if it werenât for his protective hold around your stomach. He keeps you tight against his chest for a minute, waiting for you to catch your bearings again. It takes an embarrassingly long time for the feeling in your legs to come back. Youâve never had such an intense experience like that.Â
You donât know if it's from the thrill of possibly getting caught or just because you were with him. Youâve longed and lusted after Logan for so long, and finally having the real thing is a bit of shock. Especially when he exceeded your fantasies, you didnât even know that was possible.
He props you against the sink, tugging your dress down and pulling your underwear back up. You watch him with dulled interest, still reeling from what youâve just done. Youâve never been so bold before, it almost feels liberating to just say âfuck itâ and do what you want.Â
He pulls his own pants back up, fixing his belt and grabbing a wet paper towel for you. Heâs silent as he wipes the mascara of your cheeks and you give him a questioning look. âYou want the others to know what happened?â
You scoff and glance away from him, looking towards the door of the bathroom. âIâm sure they already know. Werenât exactly subtle,â you tell him with a small smile.Â
He smirks, tossing the towel away and walking back towards you. He keeps his arms on either side of you, bracketing you against the sink and grinning down at you. âNo, we werenât, were we?â
You shake your head silently, lips curled up in amusement. Your eyes briefly dart to his lips before meeting his eyes once more. He catches the look with a sly smile, dipping his head down and giving you a brief kiss.Â
Itâs short and sweet, more loving than the passionate, rip-my-clothes-off kisses from before. It feels like the type of kiss a married couple would share in the early morning when they only want to remind the other they love each other. Your proximity and the look heâs giving you feel more intimate than anything that just happened.Â
âYou really meant it?â You muse, voice barely above a whisper as you smile at him.Â
âMeant what?â He mutters.Â
âYou like me,â you tease, entangling your hand with his and tugging him even closer to you.Â
He gives you a confused look, glancing at the sink behind you and then back at your disheveled form. âDid I not make that clear enough, kid?â
You shake your head, âNo, I think I might need another reminder,â you tell him. It takes a moment for your words to click for him. You can see when it does, he gives you a small smile and shakes his head with an aggrieved sigh like youâre bugging him.Â
âReally making me work for it, huh?â You nod your head playfully, dragging him down towards you and bringing him into another kiss. You can deal with the line forming outside in a minute. You can push off your nosy friendsâ questions for another day. Right now, itâs just you and him, finally doing what youâve wanted since the moment you saw him.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp âĄÂ
Logan Taglist:Â @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorteÂ
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl @allllium @insomniachox @izbelross âĄ
Hey Iâm just begging for a fic of Logan with a shy reader that she has a crush on him but thinks heâs never going to fix on her since Jean exists (maybe the reader can make her hair color change depending on the emotion or something
a/n: sorry I havenât been responding to asks. The new job has officially killed my spirit. But I got to work out finally and do some yoga so hopefully Iâll start feeling more motivated đ€đ€this one will be shorter
Logan Howlett x X-men!reader (Chameleon)
âChameleon!â You jump, shoulders flying up to your ears. Almost immediately you can feel the tips of your fingers tingling. Sure enough, when you look down theyâre already disappearing. Sighing, you turn around and glare at Scott.Â
âWhat have I told you about scaring me?âÂ
He grimaces, raising his hands in surrender. âSorry, I forgot.â
You roll your eyes and turn back toward your project. âEvery time,â you mutter bitterly. Youâre not an idiot. You know he thinks scaring you is funny. The whole school does. They all like to see you yelp and blend in with the nearest surface, the only thing visible is your stupid hair.Â
âYouâre, um, turning red.â Scott points to your head and you donât have to look to know your hair is shifting colors.
You reach over and swat harshly at his arm, âBecause you pissed me off! I know you scare me on purpose,â you accuse, jabbing your finger into his chest. He laughs and stumbles away from you.Â
âAlright, alright, calm down. I was just messing around a little. Look,â he glances down at the lesson plans before you and sighs. âAll this will have to wait. Charles needs us all for a mission.â
You huff and shove the papers into your desk drawer. âAlright, lead the way.â You feel Scottâs eyes still lingering on your hair and glare at him. âMove it, Summers,â you demand.Â
You were already in a bad mood, you didnât need him making it worse. It honestly shouldnât be such a big deal for you. You get scared by everyone all the time. You used to enjoy it, enjoyed the way it felt like you all had your own joke. But, eventually, it started to feel less like an inside joke and more like youâre the unwitting butt of one.Â
Some mutants get amazing powers, like Jean or Charles. Loganâs abilities are incredible, even if he doesnât believe you when you tell him that. But yours, well, you're better suited as the cheap gimmick of a childrenâs birthday party than an X-Men. Youâre just a walking mood ring that blends in with her environment.Â
The only thing youâre good for is reconnaissance missions and embarrassing yourself. You donât know what Charles sees in you. Youâve never understood why he insists youâre such a good asset to the team. Yes, you are good at spying on people, but you donât need to when Charles has such strong telepathic abilities. Youâre essentially useless in a fight due to a lack of regenerative or strength abilities.Â
More often than not you feel like a child playing dress up, chasing after the big kids. You know the others donât mean anything bad by it when they tease you into going invisible or laugh when your hair changes. Itâs all in good fun. But it doesnât make you feel any less like easy entertainment rather than a teammate.Â
It doesnât help that youâve got little to no control over your abilities when it comes to Logan. Youâve never had such a horrifically bad crush like this. Anytime he opens his mouth around you, you're fighting off the urge to just go invisible and run away. You feel like you go feral around him. You donât know how he hasnât caught onto what the colors of your hair mean when youâre near him.Â
Itâs constantly switching between some odd mix of red and pink when you talk. Which, you know what it means, but youâre praying no one else does. Red can mean angry, depending on whether youâre talking to Scott or not. You know, though, that with Logan it just means you want to jump his bones and youâre hopelessly in love with him.Â
Thankfully, like the others, he associates red with anger. Which isnât great for you because that just means he thinks every time he opens his mouth youâre pissed off. At yourself, maybe, but at him, never. It just means when he wears those stupid tanktops you want to dig your teeth into his biceps and never let go.Â
Scott opens the door to the meeting room and you slide in past him. Charles gives you a brief smile as a greeting. You take the chair at the end of the table, which just happens to be next to Logan - completely coincidental. He gives you a tense smile and you return it stiffly. You tug your hood over your hair, praying he doesnât notice the red in your strands yet. You donât want him to think you hate him. You completely prefer that over him knowing how feral you are for him, but itâs not conducive to your slow plan to finally get him to acknowledge you as a sexual partner.Â
You swear, if your name isnât Jean Grey, you might as well just be a shapeless blob of nothing. He glances over at her, that smoldering look in his eyes, and you try not to throw up in your mouth. Scott wraps an arm around Jeanâs shoulders and they break their lingering stares.Â
Logan glances over at you and catches the glare on your face before you can get rid of it. He huffs and turns towards Charles. With a sigh, you sink back into your chair and focus on not just going invisible.Â
âChameleon,â Charles says your name and your eyes widen. You wonder how much youâve missed while youâve been glaring at the back of Jeanâs head. âDoes that sound alright with you?â
You look around the table for help but theyâre all staring expectantly at you. âSure,â you stumble over the word, racking your brain for any answers. It seems not even your subconscious was paying attention to Charles droning on. âSounds great.â He gives you a satisfied nod.Â
âGood. Off to the jet, all of you.â he rolls out of the room and you wait until heâs out of earshot to kick Logan under the table.Â
He glances back at you, smirking. âDonât know what you agreed to?â
You purse your lips and shake your head. âNope,â he gives you a look like he knew youâd say that. You hate how well he can read you when it feels like youâre constantly hitting walls trying to understand him.Â
âYouâre scoping a place out for us. Making sure itâs safe so we can retrieve some information.â You give him a thankful look and he chuckles. âYou need to start paying attention, kid.â
You groan and get up from your chair, brushing past him. âI told you to quit calling me that.â It makes you feel like thatâs all heâll ever see you as, some kid invited onto the team. You want him to see you as someone he could have sex with, hopefully, love one day.Â
He glances past you at Jean. She smiles at him and you fight everything inside you to not roll your eyes and gag at them. Sheâs holding onto Scott and making fuck me eyes at Logan, which heâs happily returning. This is just too disgusting for you.Â
You shove past him and ignore how he calls out your name. Your real name. Heâs the only one that uses it. For some reason, most people just refer to you by Chameleon. You donât understand why. They just donât seem to think of you outside your abilities as a mutant.Â
You make it to the jet before the others, taking the private time to change into your X-Men suit. If thereâs one useful thing about your ability, itâs that it affects whateverâs touching you. Which means, you donât have to strip naked to go completely invisible. And if anyone is around you, all you have to do is hold onto them and theyâll blend in too.Â
Youâre tugging up the zipper of your top as Logan walks in. He gives you an odd look, sitting on the bench in front of you. âAngry about something?â He asks, gaze darting up to your head.Â
You drag your fingers over the ends of your hair and sigh. âNo,â you tell him bluntly, taking the seat beside him.Â
His brows furrow in confusion. âItâs red, though,â he points out, his tone colored in suspicion.Â
You laugh a little, âRed doesnât always mean angry.â Itâs the most youâve ever confided about your hair colors to him. The largest hint youâve ever given him that you donât hate him. Youâre worried if he knew how you really felt about him, heâd think you were a little creep.Â
He slides his arm behind you on the bench, leaning in until youâre practically sharing the same air. You know your eyes are comically large, you donât even want to know what color your hair is turning right now. âWhat else does it mean, kid?â He whispers and you donât even pay attention to the nickname. All you can see and hear right now is him. How close he is, how close your lips are.Â
You could lean forward an inch or two and youâd be kissing. âUm,â you swallow harshly around the lump in your throat. You donât even know what he asked you, all you can think about now is kissing him.Â
âLogan!â Ororoâs voice echoes through the jet and you leap away from him, trying to calm your racing heart. Logan sighs and leans back in his seat, giving Storm a tense smile. She glances at you and laughs, âSheâs nearly see-through, what are you doing to her?â
You frown and look down at your hands. Sure enough, youâre going translucent. You let out a silent groan, and tuck your knees into your chest. You take a few deep breaths until youâre one solid form again. Itâs so embarrassing when that happens, when you lose control over yourself like that.Â
But itâs even worse when Logan does it to you. He gives you hope, stupid, hateful hope, for one minute that he might feel something deeper. Only for it to be another joke. Youâre a walking mood ring, nothing more than a quick laugh to all of them.Â
Jean walks up the ramp, her gaze going to Logan first before drifting towards you. âAre you alright?â She mutters, trying not to let the others hear. Of course, Logan can, with his stupid enhanced abilities. âYouâre turning blue,â she points out and you roll your eyes.Â
You can feel Loganâs stare burning holes into the side of your head and it only makes you feel worse. You hate being a joke, but you also hate showing them just how much it affects you. You donât want to seem like a crybaby that canât handle a little teasing. But youâd thought coming to Charlesâ school meant people would stop poking fun at you. It feels like being dragged right back into high school.Â
âIâm fine,â you tell her. She doesnât look like she believes you but she takes a seat anyway. Of course, placing herself right next to Logan, even though her fiancee is a few feet away from her, looking just as hurt as you. They lean into each other and whisper. Theyâre not even trying to hide it anymore. You let your glare bore into the floor, ignoring how much seeing them together hurts.Â
The mission had gone well, Logan had been hoping to go to the bar and grab a drink with you. But the second his back is towards you, youâre running off the jet. Logan calls out your name, trying to catch up. You glance back at him, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. He smiles at you and your eyes widen. You go invisible and Logan glances around, baffled.Â
He calls out your name again but the door ahead of him opens and closes quickly. He can only assume youâve run away again. You always run away from him. Youâre always pissed off at him. He doesnât know what Jeanâs talking about when she says you like him.Â
Loganâs never met anyone more repulsed by him.Â
âWould you just trust me?â Jean tells him lowly, creeping up behind him.Â
His face falls and he turns to her, glaring at her knowing smirk. âShe just fuckinâ ran away from me. Pretty sure thatâs about as good a hint as Iâm gonna get, Jean.â
She glances over her shoulder, waving Scott away and looping her arm through Loganâs. âYouâre an idiot, Howlett.â He scoffs and she swats at his shoulder. âTrust me, I can read minds, remember?â
Of course, he knows sheâs got some pretty decent telepathic abilities. But he didnât think she would so brazenly breach your boundaries. Thereâs an unspoken rule that the mind readers of the school donât delve into your brain without permission.Â
She sees the look on his face and sighs. âI didnât read her mind. She got drunk a little while ago and told me about her raging crush on you,â she laughs a little at your expense and Logan lets out a short chuckle. You can be a pretty sloppy drunk if they let you go too far. He figures it was one of those girlâs nights he wants nothing to do with. Youâd probably let the tight reigns you keep on yourself slip for once.Â
âShe goes red every time she sees me. I donât know what else that could mean other than she hates me.â Logan isnât surprised that youâre not taken with him like he is with you. Heâs used to the rejection, but it hurts just a bit more coming from you. Youâre so welcoming to the others.Â
You embrace every new member of the school with open arms. Yet, with him, you get angry whenever you see him. You see through his walls, see the rot lurking underneath them. And, rightfully, want nothing to do with him. He understands your reasoning.Â
Most days he barely wants anything to do with himself. Heâs made a lot of bad choices in his life, half of which he canât remember. But heâd hoped, for one minute, that you might give him a second chance. As much as Jean insists otherwise, he can see the truth of how you feel about him every time you run away.Â
âRed doesnât always mean anger,â Jean tells him elusively. Itâs the same thing youâd said to him on the jet. It makes his brows furrow in confusion and he glares at her.Â
âWhat else could it mean?â He demands sharply, sick of her teasing him with the possibility you might feel the same way.Â
She bites her lip, looking suddenly sheepish. âI canât say-â
âJean,â Logan snaps. He stops her from walking any further, keeping her planted in one spot with him. âTell me,â heâs sick of the games youâre both playing with him. He just wants some straight fucking answers. How hard is that?
She sighs and looks away from him. âI promised her I wouldnât tell.â
âAnd Iâm sure you promised you also wouldnât tell me how she feels about me,â he points out. Thereâs a sharp tone to his voice, itâs rude but he canât bother feeling guilty about it.Â
She canât meet his eye, a smirk fighting at the corner of her lips. He waits impatiently for her answer, irritation broiling quickly in his gut. Heâs about to snap at her again when she finally meets his eyes.Â
She speaks through a laugh, like what sheâs about to say is so ridiculous she canât hold it in. âShe wants,â she cuts herself off with another laugh and Logan groans in frustration. He begins to walk away from her when she yells, âShe wants to fuck you!â At his back.Â
His eyes widen in surprise before he turns back to her with a displeased look. âAre you fuckinâ with me?â He demands, narrowing his eyes at her suspiciously.Â
She shakes her head and brushes past him. âYou didnât hear it from me,â she warns, tone grave as she leaves the room.Â
Logan is left standing in the same spot, stunned at the revelation. Heâs not sure how much of that he believes. But he doesnât understand why Jean would possibly lie to him about this. She gains nothing by setting him up for failure. As much as he doubts the honesty behind her words, heâs got no other choice but to trust them.Â
He heads to the most likely place youâre hiding out. Charles has a private library thatâs blocked off from the kids. There are too many first editions in there, he canât risk any of them accidentally blowing them up. You like to head there when youâre trying to avoid people.Â
He tries to stay quiet as he walks in, not wanting you to run off again. Itâs hard to confront someone who goes invisible whenever she feels like it. He sees light blue hair draped over the back of an armchair. He feels like a creep as he stalks towards you, sneaking and pouncing on you so you canât run away.Â
He canât imagine how Jean ever thought him approaching you would be a good idea. He whispers your name, trying not to startle you. It doesnât take a genius to see how much you hate when the others scare you. They might not mean anything bad by it, but they have to be blind not to see how much it pisses you off.Â
You still jump, glancing up at him with a surprised look. He looks to your hair for any tells of how you feel. Some pink weaves its way through the stands but it otherwise stays relatively blue. His brows furrow in confusion, he canât tell if itâs a good or bad sign that thereâs no red.Â
âHow are ya, kid? Ran off pretty quick earlier.âÂ
âDonât call me that,â you mutter, giving him a brief glare before staring absently down at the book in your hands. Logan kneels beside your armchair, covering the pages with his hand. You huff, giving him an expectant look. âYes, Logan?â You demand, tone short.
Logan tilts his head, examining you and your body language. You seem relatively closed off, irritated at him or something else. He doesnât know what to say. Heâs never been good with words or trying to express how he feels. Heâs more comfortable showing how much he cares for those around him.Â
Throwing caution to the wind, he lets his hand drift to your wrist and tugs you forward. Your eyes widen as he drags you toward him. The kiss is short, he doesnât want to push you too much. But it takes everything in him to stop himself from deepening it. All he wants is to pull you into his arms and devour you.Â
He holds back, parting from you with a low exhale. Your eyes flutter open and he grins when he sees the bright red your hair has turned. âWhat,â you sputter and stumble over your words. You shove him back and leap to your feet. âWhat the hell was that?â You demand, voice higher than heâs ever heard of it. âWhat was that?â You ask him shrilly, again.Â
You almost seem to be stuck in a loop, blinking rapidly and asking the same thing. Logan chuckles and gets to his feet, he gives you a knowing look and you narrow your eyes at him in disbelief.Â
âJean told me.â
Your brows furrow and you shake your head. Realization dawns on your face and you gasp, looking up at him with something like horror on your expression. âNo,â you tell him lowly. âShe didnât,â it almost sounds like youâre begging him to tell you otherwise.Â
He laughs again and your face falls. You start going clear, he can see the bookshelf through your stomach and he sighs. He grabs your hand, holding onto you before you can run again. You donât even seem to be aware that youâre slowly disappearing from view.Â
âSheâs, uh,â he struggles to figure out what to say to make you feel better. âSheâs been coaching me,â he admits shamefully. âTrying to help me talk to you.â
You glance up at him but he can barely see your expression. The only thing reassuring him youâre here is his grip on you and your voice. âWhat? But I thought that-â You cut yourself off quickly and Logan glares down at where he thinks your face is.Â
âThought what?â
You take a long pause and exhale deeply. âI thought,â you mutter, âyou liked her.â
âSheâs with Scott,â he points out bluntly. He can practically hear you roll your eyes, even if he canât see it.Â
âYeah, I know. But you guys are always whispering to each other and making googly eyes.â
âGoogly eyes?â He interrupts, disgust clear in his tone.Â
âI was wrong,â you continue, ignoring him. âI see that now, but I thought you didnât care about me.â
Logan huffs, he hates that you thought that. He should have just been open with you from the start. Heâs faced rejection his whole life, he shouldnât have been so petrified of it just because it could come from you. If heâd just manned up and told you earlier, it would have saved you both a lot of time and hurt.Â
âKid,â he hopes heâs making eye contact with you and not just staring at some random book. Itâs really hard to tell when you go invisible like this. âYouâre the only person I care about in here.â
Youâre quiet for a long while and he worries youâve somehow slipped away without him realizing. But, ever so slowly, you start coming back into view. Logan awkwardly averts his eyes from your breasts, heâd been hoping he was making eye contact with you, clearly, he was wrong.Â
âYou mean that?â You ask, and he hates the trepidation in your voice. Heâs never been good with words, he doesnât know how to tell you how much you mean to him. But he can show you.Â
His hand drifts up your arm, wrapping around the back of your neck and tugging you towards him. You trip over your feet, hands landing on his chest to stabilize yourself. He leans down, hovering over your lips for a moment. He waits until your eyes drift shut and your lips purse impatiently before he finally kisses you again.Â
He doesnât hold himself back this time. He pours every racing thought heâs ever had about you, every one of his wanted-to-tell-you-how-he-feels-and-hasnât moments into the kiss. Your hands slowly curl up into his shirt, wrinkling it and tugging him further into you.Â
To his surprise, you deepen the kiss, mouth moving over his like you want to devour him whole. Heâs sure if he opened his eyes your hair would be a bright roaring red. He smirks against your lips, happy that, for once, he actually listened to Jean. If it gets him results like this, he might have to do it more often.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp âĄÂ
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorte Â
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl @allllium @insomniachox @izbelross âĄÂ
Logan Howlett x fem!reader
a/n: inspired by the fact that Hugh Jackman thought wolverines were just a type of wolf and no one corrected him. Rusty because I havenât written smut in a while so you guys arenât allowed to talk any shit. Plus, Iâm too much of a wimp to be like extremely explicit, but these prompts ( one, two, three) together were too good to pass up.Â
SMUT 18+Â (my slight monsterfucker tendencies might shine through in this one)
Summary: Logan's told you a million times not to take the path through the woods. You never listen, of course. Now there's a monster on your tail and you're all alone. (part of my Halloween Palooza)
You never should have taken this path. You knew it was going to happen, Logan had warned you, and you still didnât listen. Now, youâre in the middle of the woods, completely turned around and on the verge of tears. God, why do you never listen?
You put your groceries down and pull out your phone. Through the thick spread of leaves, you get minimal moonlight. Youâre surrounded by shifting shadows and rustling undergrowth. Everywhere you turn is a monster waiting to leap out at you.Â
When you were little you were petrified of the dark. You hated the shapes you saw lurking within it. Youâd outgrown that as an adult, but now, you can barely breathe as your eyes dart all around. The childish fear is returned with a vengeance and you feel like youâre about to have a heart attack.Â
You flip open your phone, squatting on the ground and trying to conserve your body's warmth. The temperature must have dropped twenty degrees since you left the house. Of course, Logan had told you to bring a jacket too. Did you listen? No.Â
You were only going out to get some chips and dip, you really didnât think it would take so long. But then youâd got caught up talking to one of your friends and before you knew it, it was pitch black outside. You should have just called Logan at the store, asked him for a ride. Now, youâre staring down at the flickering screen of your flip phone and about to sob as you see the bars disappearing.Â
âNo fucking service, of course,â you hiss and shove the phone back in your pocket. The batteryâs nearly dead anyway. You doubt it would have lasted long enough for a phone call. You run a stressed hand over your face, trying to calm your breathing down.Â
Youâre trying to trick yourself into thinking that everythingâs okay. That the shadows are just shadows and youâre scared. Then you hear it.Â
Itâs a low noise, something out of your worst nightmares. Thereâs an immediate spike of adrenaline as an inhuman growl echoes through the night air. You swear you can feel it inside your chest. It rumbles through the animal, bursts through clenched fangs, and makes the hair on your neck stand on end.Â
You glance over your shoulder, mouth parted in a silent scream. You donât see anything, you canât. You just barely make out the branches shifting nearby before youâre leaping to your feet. You almost call out, see whose there, but that feels like the last move every bimbo makes in a horror movie.Â
So, you do something arguably worse. You abandon your groceries and purse and bolt. Immediately you can hear its pounding footsteps chasing after you. You do scream now, thereâs no point in swallowing it down. Itâs like the terror is ripping through you, making you stumble over every branch and rock in your path.Â
You know it's faster than you. You can hear how easily its keeping up its stride behind you. This feels like a game to it. It's just teasing you, dangling freedom in front of its prey before it closes its drooling maw around your neck.Â
You trip over an enlarged root and go flying forward. Rocks scrape across your arm and you let out a short shriek of pain. The flesh tears easily on the sharp points and the metallic scent of your blood fills the air. It comes to a sudden stop a few feet away from you. There are no thoughts in your head besides the voice screaming at you to RUN!
It tells you to keep running. If you stop it will catch you and it will kill you. This is no longer a product of your imagination. This is real and it is hungry for you. You scramble to your feet, boots slipping along the muddy forest floor. You dig your fingers into the earth, feel the dirt slide under your nails, and launch yourself forward. You nearly flip your feet over your head but you manage to keep yourself steady.Â
You canât hear the steps behind you. The beat of your heart pounds through your head, drives you forward, and discombobulates you all the same. Blood rushes so quickly beneath your skin that you can feel your vessels swelling with the warmth of your terror-fueled adrenaline.Â
Youâve never felt so inferior before, like a rabbit desperately trying to escape the hungry jaws of a wolf. Your legs are moving faster than they ever have, youâre bounding, racing, leaping through the forest. You move through it like you were born in it, anything to escape whatever was following you.Â
You no longer remember the way home or what home is. You can only focus on right now. You donât notice the dark shape running alongside you, or how easily it keeps pace. Not until itâs barreling into your side and you go slamming into the ground again. Your head nearly bounces against a rock but something slides underneath it, stopping the impact at the last second.Â
Something rough grips at your face. Youâre still blind, blood rushing so hard beneath your skin, youâre practically blind with panic. You bite down, taste flesh, and hold on until blood rushes into your mouth. The metallic tang of it is like poison against your tongue but you donât let go.Â
âRelease!â He orders you like a dog. His voice is so thick with anger and hunger that you barely recognize it. But something clicks in your head and you unlock your jaw from his palm. âThe fuck have I told you about taking this path?â Again, his voice is so thick with volatile rage that you barely register it.Â
âSorry,â you sob out, shoving at his chest and scrambling to sit up. But he keeps you pinned to the ground, one hand clamped tightly around your neck and the other pushing down against your stomach. You can feel something hard against your thigh but you pay it no mind, still struggling to catch your breath.Â
You take in deep, heaving, gasps of air and the moon shifts overhead. It gives you just enough light to see Logan clearly now. You nearly choke at the sight of his face. His lips are peeled back, sharpened points of teeth causing blood to bead along his lower lips. His beard seems scruffier than normal and thereâs a golden glow to his eyes.Â
âWhat the fuck?â You stutter out, glaring up at him. Youâve seen him angry before. But youâve never seen him quite so animalistic. âLogan?â You whisper his name hesitantly and it only makes him look more pissed off. You shrink back, though thereâs not far to go with him holding you like this.Â
His hips shift down and you bite down on your lip so a pathetic whimper doesnât escape you. His head tilts curiously, gaze raking over your heaving chest and then down to the too-short shorts youâd put on earlier.Â
He gives you a look of astonished disbelief, âYou fuckinâ kidding me?âÂ
The hand on your stomach drifts down to the waistband of your shorts. Your eyes widen when you realize what heâs trying to do. âLogan, wait-â Too late. He rips the shorts down your legs and his eyes widen. The sneer of his lips finally melts away as he sees the clear wet spot in the middle of your underwear.Â
You donât even get a chance to defend yourself before heâs gripping your hips and flipping you over. Your hands struggle for purchase on the slippery rock in front of you. You try and glance back at him, but he buries a hand in your hair, tugging harshly, and forcing your face forward.Â
âLogan, please,â you whine, thoroughly humiliated as he sits behind you, silently examining your battered form. Youâd tripped more than you thought while youâd been running from him. The adrenaline has just barely waned enough for you to feel the bruises forming. But he has no sympathy for your plight, if anything your tears seem to egg him on.Â
âWhat have I told you about taking this path?â You bite your tongue, a sudden refusal to answer raging forth. Heâs got you half-naked on your hands and knees after chasing you through the woods. You shouldnât have to be scolded like an imbecile on top of that.Â
He leans over you, the weight of his body pushing forward, your arms strain to keep you both up. You grit your teeth, still keeping your mouth clamped shut. He chuckles, the noise so low you feel it rattling through you rather than hear it. âI could hear you.â
His hand drifts down your bicep, wraps around your front, and rests over your breasts. âCould hear how fast your heart was beating. Itâs still about to come out of your chest.â You suck in a sharp breath, keeping yourself from arching into his touch.
His nose lingers against the side of your head, dipping towards your neck and inhaling deeply. Your face wrinkles in confusion as he practically smells you. âI can smell how terrified you were.â His hand suddenly jerks your head back and you canât help but yelp. Thereâs a smirk on his lips as he finally gets a noise from you.Â
You can feel the desire practically dripping down your thighs at this point. All you can think about is how powerful he is. How hungry he is for you. You want him to devour you, completely wreck you.Â
He releases you and without his support, you slump forward, neck bowing awkwardly. You try and right yourself but one of his hands grips your neck so tight you can feel the blood rushing up into your face. He pins you there and the only warning you have of what heâs about to do is the sound of his belt buckle coming undone.Â
He thrusts into you and your jaw drops. You inhale the dirt beneath you and it tastes remarkably like blood. He pushes your cheek further into the ground and you grunt as tiny little pebbles have their taste of your flesh.Â
Had you not been so wet, you doubt you would have enjoyed a second of this. But, because his chasing you down like something feral made you more aroused than you have been in months, you let out a pathetic moan beneath him. It borders on the thin line between pain and pleasure. But each rough thrust inside you blurs the line until theyâre indiscernible from one another.Â
Your fists curl up, mud sticking in the lines of your palm as he takes you like youâre nothing more than a toy. You shouldnât like this, shouldnât like how used you feel. But you relish it. Relish in how crazy you make him, to the point that heâd lose his mind and use you like this.Â
Heâs like a fucking animal. Taking what he wants from you with no concern or care to whether you like it or not. Heâs panting and grunting behind you, you donât understand the insults spewing from his mouth because thereâs blood rushing in your ears and you feel like you might pass out.Â
The adrenaline and residual terror from earlier are building into one explosive moment inside you. Your fingers tremble with it, your limbs burn from the volatile feeling and you canât help the noises being forced out of you. It doesnât take much longer for you to combust.Â
Pleasure rushes through you, makes you numb to the world around you. A dulled tickling feeling rushes through every part of you. Your arms go limp and heâs quick to wrap a hand around your waist, keeping you upright. He presses into your lower back, arching it until heâs hitting the spot inside you that causes aftershocks of painful pleasure.Â
Your core throbs as you pulse around him. Sucking him deeper until his hips come to an erratic stop and he spills inside you. You keep your forehead pressed to the cool earth beneath you. You never actually managed to catch your breath before and now it just feels like youâre five seconds away from hyperventilating.Â
A soothing hand runs up and down your spine, he curls around you and helps you to sit up. His voice is a low whisper, âYou alright?â
You close your eyes, taking in a deep breath and giving him a shaky nod. He laughs and pulls you to stand up. Your legs were limp from running earlier, now theyâre practically boneless. He keeps you propped against him and pulls your shorts back up.Â
He buttons his jeans and straightens. His eyes narrow as he glares down at you. He cups your chin, tilting your head to examine the scratches on your cheeks and tutting at you. His fingers tighten to the point of pain and he jerks your face up to meet his eyes. âYou gonna come down this path again?â
After that, yes. You completely would. He sees the look on your face and rolls his eyes. He leans down, tossing you over his shoulder and groaning. âYouâre gonna be the death of me.â
âYou like it,â you taunt, tugging at his shirt for balance.Â
He shakes his head but you know heâs smiling. âYouâre lucky I love you.â
âSame time next week?â You tease as he goes back for your groceries and purse.Â
âDonât push it,â he snaps.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp âĄÂ
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorte Â
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl @allllium @insomniachox @izbelross âĄÂ
Logan Howlett x fem!reader
a/n: inspired by the fact that Hugh Jackman thought wolverines were just a type of wolf and no one corrected him. Rusty because I havenât written smut in a while so you guys arenât allowed to talk any shit. Plus, Iâm too much of a wimp to be like extremely explicit, but these prompts ( one, two, three) together were too good to pass up.Â
SMUT 18+Â (my slight monsterfucker tendencies might shine through in this one)
Summary: Logan's told you a million times not to take the path through the woods. You never listen, of course. Now there's a monster on your tail and you're all alone. (part of my Halloween Palooza)
You never should have taken this path. You knew it was going to happen, Logan had warned you, and you still didnât listen. Now, youâre in the middle of the woods, completely turned around and on the verge of tears. God, why do you never listen?
You put your groceries down and pull out your phone. Through the thick spread of leaves, you get minimal moonlight. Youâre surrounded by shifting shadows and rustling undergrowth. Everywhere you turn is a monster waiting to leap out at you.Â
When you were little you were petrified of the dark. You hated the shapes you saw lurking within it. Youâd outgrown that as an adult, but now, you can barely breathe as your eyes dart all around. The childish fear is returned with a vengeance and you feel like youâre about to have a heart attack.Â
You flip open your phone, squatting on the ground and trying to conserve your body's warmth. The temperature must have dropped twenty degrees since you left the house. Of course, Logan had told you to bring a jacket too. Did you listen? No.Â
You were only going out to get some chips and dip, you really didnât think it would take so long. But then youâd got caught up talking to one of your friends and before you knew it, it was pitch black outside. You should have just called Logan at the store, asked him for a ride. Now, youâre staring down at the flickering screen of your flip phone and about to sob as you see the bars disappearing.Â
âNo fucking service, of course,â you hiss and shove the phone back in your pocket. The batteryâs nearly dead anyway. You doubt it would have lasted long enough for a phone call. You run a stressed hand over your face, trying to calm your breathing down.Â
Youâre trying to trick yourself into thinking that everythingâs okay. That the shadows are just shadows and youâre scared. Then you hear it.Â
Itâs a low noise, something out of your worst nightmares. Thereâs an immediate spike of adrenaline as an inhuman growl echoes through the night air. You swear you can feel it inside your chest. It rumbles through the animal, bursts through clenched fangs, and makes the hair on your neck stand on end.Â
You glance over your shoulder, mouth parted in a silent scream. You donât see anything, you canât. You just barely make out the branches shifting nearby before youâre leaping to your feet. You almost call out, see whose there, but that feels like the last move every bimbo makes in a horror movie.Â
So, you do something arguably worse. You abandon your groceries and purse and bolt. Immediately you can hear its pounding footsteps chasing after you. You do scream now, thereâs no point in swallowing it down. Itâs like the terror is ripping through you, making you stumble over every branch and rock in your path.Â
You know it's faster than you. You can hear how easily its keeping up its stride behind you. This feels like a game to it. It's just teasing you, dangling freedom in front of its prey before it closes its drooling maw around your neck.Â
You trip over an enlarged root and go flying forward. Rocks scrape across your arm and you let out a short shriek of pain. The flesh tears easily on the sharp points and the metallic scent of your blood fills the air. It comes to a sudden stop a few feet away from you. There are no thoughts in your head besides the voice screaming at you to RUN!
It tells you to keep running. If you stop it will catch you and it will kill you. This is no longer a product of your imagination. This is real and it is hungry for you. You scramble to your feet, boots slipping along the muddy forest floor. You dig your fingers into the earth, feel the dirt slide under your nails, and launch yourself forward. You nearly flip your feet over your head but you manage to keep yourself steady.Â
You canât hear the steps behind you. The beat of your heart pounds through your head, drives you forward, and discombobulates you all the same. Blood rushes so quickly beneath your skin that you can feel your vessels swelling with the warmth of your terror-fueled adrenaline.Â
Youâve never felt so inferior before, like a rabbit desperately trying to escape the hungry jaws of a wolf. Your legs are moving faster than they ever have, youâre bounding, racing, leaping through the forest. You move through it like you were born in it, anything to escape whatever was following you.Â
You no longer remember the way home or what home is. You can only focus on right now. You donât notice the dark shape running alongside you, or how easily it keeps pace. Not until itâs barreling into your side and you go slamming into the ground again. Your head nearly bounces against a rock but something slides underneath it, stopping the impact at the last second.Â
Something rough grips at your face. Youâre still blind, blood rushing so hard beneath your skin, youâre practically blind with panic. You bite down, taste flesh, and hold on until blood rushes into your mouth. The metallic tang of it is like poison against your tongue but you donât let go.Â
âRelease!â He orders you like a dog. His voice is so thick with anger and hunger that you barely recognize it. But something clicks in your head and you unlock your jaw from his palm. âThe fuck have I told you about taking this path?â Again, his voice is so thick with volatile rage that you barely register it.Â
âSorry,â you sob out, shoving at his chest and scrambling to sit up. But he keeps you pinned to the ground, one hand clamped tightly around your neck and the other pushing down against your stomach. You can feel something hard against your thigh but you pay it no mind, still struggling to catch your breath.Â
You take in deep, heaving, gasps of air and the moon shifts overhead. It gives you just enough light to see Logan clearly now. You nearly choke at the sight of his face. His lips are peeled back, sharpened points of teeth causing blood to bead along his lower lips. His beard seems scruffier than normal and thereâs a golden glow to his eyes.Â
âWhat the fuck?â You stutter out, glaring up at him. Youâve seen him angry before. But youâve never seen him quite so animalistic. âLogan?â You whisper his name hesitantly and it only makes him look more pissed off. You shrink back, though thereâs not far to go with him holding you like this.Â
His hips shift down and you bite down on your lip so a pathetic whimper doesnât escape you. His head tilts curiously, gaze raking over your heaving chest and then down to the too-short shorts youâd put on earlier.Â
He gives you a look of astonished disbelief, âYou fuckinâ kidding me?âÂ
The hand on your stomach drifts down to the waistband of your shorts. Your eyes widen when you realize what heâs trying to do. âLogan, wait-â Too late. He rips the shorts down your legs and his eyes widen. The sneer of his lips finally melts away as he sees the clear wet spot in the middle of your underwear.Â
You donât even get a chance to defend yourself before heâs gripping your hips and flipping you over. Your hands struggle for purchase on the slippery rock in front of you. You try and glance back at him, but he buries a hand in your hair, tugging harshly, and forcing your face forward.Â
âLogan, please,â you whine, thoroughly humiliated as he sits behind you, silently examining your battered form. Youâd tripped more than you thought while youâd been running from him. The adrenaline has just barely waned enough for you to feel the bruises forming. But he has no sympathy for your plight, if anything your tears seem to egg him on.Â
âWhat have I told you about taking this path?â You bite your tongue, a sudden refusal to answer raging forth. Heâs got you half-naked on your hands and knees after chasing you through the woods. You shouldnât have to be scolded like an imbecile on top of that.Â
He leans over you, the weight of his body pushing forward, your arms strain to keep you both up. You grit your teeth, still keeping your mouth clamped shut. He chuckles, the noise so low you feel it rattling through you rather than hear it. âI could hear you.â
His hand drifts down your bicep, wraps around your front, and rests over your breasts. âCould hear how fast your heart was beating. Itâs still about to come out of your chest.â You suck in a sharp breath, keeping yourself from arching into his touch.
His nose lingers against the side of your head, dipping towards your neck and inhaling deeply. Your face wrinkles in confusion as he practically smells you. âI can smell how terrified you were.â His hand suddenly jerks your head back and you canât help but yelp. Thereâs a smirk on his lips as he finally gets a noise from you.Â
You can feel the desire practically dripping down your thighs at this point. All you can think about is how powerful he is. How hungry he is for you. You want him to devour you, completely wreck you.Â
He releases you and without his support, you slump forward, neck bowing awkwardly. You try and right yourself but one of his hands grips your neck so tight you can feel the blood rushing up into your face. He pins you there and the only warning you have of what heâs about to do is the sound of his belt buckle coming undone.Â
He thrusts into you and your jaw drops. You inhale the dirt beneath you and it tastes remarkably like blood. He pushes your cheek further into the ground and you grunt as tiny little pebbles have their taste of your flesh.Â
Had you not been so wet, you doubt you would have enjoyed a second of this. But, because his chasing you down like something feral made you more aroused than you have been in months, you let out a pathetic moan beneath him. It borders on the thin line between pain and pleasure. But each rough thrust inside you blurs the line until theyâre indiscernible from one another.Â
Your fists curl up, mud sticking in the lines of your palm as he takes you like youâre nothing more than a toy. You shouldnât like this, shouldnât like how used you feel. But you relish it. Relish in how crazy you make him, to the point that heâd lose his mind and use you like this.Â
Heâs like a fucking animal. Taking what he wants from you with no concern or care to whether you like it or not. Heâs panting and grunting behind you, you donât understand the insults spewing from his mouth because thereâs blood rushing in your ears and you feel like you might pass out.Â
The adrenaline and residual terror from earlier are building into one explosive moment inside you. Your fingers tremble with it, your limbs burn from the volatile feeling and you canât help the noises being forced out of you. It doesnât take much longer for you to combust.Â
Pleasure rushes through you, makes you numb to the world around you. A dulled tickling feeling rushes through every part of you. Your arms go limp and heâs quick to wrap a hand around your waist, keeping you upright. He presses into your lower back, arching it until heâs hitting the spot inside you that causes aftershocks of painful pleasure.Â
Your core throbs as you pulse around him. Sucking him deeper until his hips come to an erratic stop and he spills inside you. You keep your forehead pressed to the cool earth beneath you. You never actually managed to catch your breath before and now it just feels like youâre five seconds away from hyperventilating.Â
A soothing hand runs up and down your spine, he curls around you and helps you to sit up. His voice is a low whisper, âYou alright?â
You close your eyes, taking in a deep breath and giving him a shaky nod. He laughs and pulls you to stand up. Your legs were limp from running earlier, now theyâre practically boneless. He keeps you propped against him and pulls your shorts back up.Â
He buttons his jeans and straightens. His eyes narrow as he glares down at you. He cups your chin, tilting your head to examine the scratches on your cheeks and tutting at you. His fingers tighten to the point of pain and he jerks your face up to meet his eyes. âYou gonna come down this path again?â
After that, yes. You completely would. He sees the look on your face and rolls his eyes. He leans down, tossing you over his shoulder and groaning. âYouâre gonna be the death of me.â
âYou like it,â you taunt, tugging at his shirt for balance.Â
He shakes his head but you know heâs smiling. âYouâre lucky I love you.â
âSame time next week?â You tease as he goes back for your groceries and purse.Â
âDonât push it,â he snaps.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp âĄÂ
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorte Â
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl @allllium @insomniachox @izbelross âĄÂ
pt two of broken promises (I know I'm so creative with names)
bodyguard!logan howlett x fem!runaway reader
a/n: SMUT 18+ MDNI they, like, never use protection (don't be silly, sheathe your willy) but Iâd like to make it 100% clear now that she has a magic uterus and there will be absolutely NO baby-making. Just rocking unprotected sex đđ If youâre tagged in this, it does not mean that I am permanently adding you to my taglist. It just means I saw you in my comments/reblogs/inbox asking for a part two and this was the easiest way to let you know I made one. If you would like to be added to the taglist, feel free to ask. Summary: Life on the road isn't exactly glamorous. Cramped spaces and too many cheap motels have you and Logan at each other's throats. You feel eyes tracking you everywhere you go but you're afraid to tell him, afraid it will be the end of the road for the both of you. One cheap bar and an explosion later and your whole life is flipped upside down.
âWhat are you doing?â
You glance over Loganâs shoulder at the register. The man behind it isnât looking at either of you, just disinterestedly scrolling through his phone.Â
âIsnât this what you do?â You ask, motioning to the pack of beef jerky youâre stuffing down your jacket.Â
Logan scoffs and shakes his head. âNo, kid.â He takes the bag from you and rolls his eyes.Â
âWell, then how do you pay for this stuff?â
âNormally, with the money I get from my jobs. But your dad wasnât too forthcoming with my last paycheck.â
You feel that familiar burning churn of guilt roiling around in your gut. Youâve definitely added another complication to his life and it makes you feel like nothing more than a burden sometimes. âOh, Logan, Iâm sorry.â
Logan glances down at you. He gives you that familiar appeasing look, squeezing you closer, and drags you towards the register. He tosses the snacks and drinks onto the counter. The guy just barely glances up at you both.Â
âWill that be all?â He asks in a tone that says he could care less.Â
âYeah,â you answer, eyes drifting towards the magazine rack. Your face is plastered on the cover of a cheap tabloid.Â
LOCAL POLITICIANS DAUGHTER STILL MISSING
Exclusive interview with family on PG. 6
Your eyes go wide and you turn your face further into Loganâs chest. He gives you a confused look before his eyes are snagged by the same thing that caught your attention.Â
âWhy donât you go wait in the truck?â You nod and slip out of his hold, being mindful to keep your face away from the security camera near the front.Â
That keeps happening. You hadnât thought you would have made news, but your father was making this a part of his campaign. Claiming youâd been taken by a mutant bodyguard and that heâs been praying for your safe return. âExpertsâ have been claiming that with no ransom demanded youâre being turned into a message for anyone who goes against mutants.Â
Now, mutants despise you and everyone else thinks youâre a martyr. In a few years, youâre sure youâll be turned into some true crime documentary where people youâve never met before are crying over your disappearance.Â
You slide into the truck and let out a deep sigh. Youâd thought running away would be freeing. But even a hundred miles from him, you can still feel the cold grip of your fatherâs hand around your throat.Â
âTwenty on pump seven,â Logan tosses the cash on the counter, eyes drifting to you in the truck. It was instinct at this point, always keeping an eye on you. Especially since one of your fatherâs more fanatic supporters had spotted you in a shitty diner a week ago. Theyâd called the cops and tried to bar you and Logan from leaving.Â
It hadnât gone over well for him.Â
Heâd been trying to keep you a little more hidden since then, but it left a sour taste in his mouth. Heâd gotten you out of that house to show you what real life was like, to give you a taste of freedom.Â
He felt like he was no better than your father, keeping you cooped up and covered constantly.Â
When the kid in front of him doesnât say anything, Logan clears his throat. He gives him a quizzical look but the boyâs eyes are stuck on the door.Â
âI swear I know her,â he mutters. Loganâs eyes drift towards the TV behind the counter and he sees an old news story of you. Theyâre using the footage of the acid attack, claiming youâve always been the mutant movementâs target.Â
âCan I get twenty on pump seven,â Logan repeats, voice firm. The kid finally looks at him and whatever expression Logan is wearing is enough for him to finally start moving.Â
The second the receipt is in his hand heâs rushing out the door. He doesnât know how long itâs going to take that dumbass to piece two and two together but he canât risk dawdling.Â
He fills the tank up, eyes scanning the gas station the entire time. Heâs had a cloying sense of paranoia ever since the incident in the diner. He knows that at some point this little run of yours is going to come to an end.Â
He doesnât know if itâll end with cops finding the two of you. Or if youâre going to realize the real world isnât all that fun and leave him behind. He knows that a girl like you, one who's used to the finer things, is never going to be satisfied by the life he can offer.Â
But heâs hoping that you come to your senses later rather than sooner. Heâs enjoying traveling with you a lot more than he wants to admit.Â
He gets in the truck, starts it up, and glances over at you. You smile, the smile that makes him feel things he doesnât like admitting to himself or you.Â
âAll good?â You ask.Â
He nods, driving off without a word because he doesnât want to tell you the truth. Doesnât want to admit what you both know to be a fact. The time you have together has an expiration date and heâs worried itâs creeping closer.Â
Loganâs inside some shitty roadside motel. Whatever heâs talking about with the owner is clearly getting heated. You can see the way the angerâs growing on his face. His body is tensed up and he looks like heâs five seconds away from leaping over the counter and taking the greasy man leering at him down.Â
Thereâs a final word exchanged between them and then Logan is storming back towards the truck. He slams the door closed so hard youâre surprised the windows donât shatter. Normally, you sleep in the trailer. Itâs not always the warmest or coziest, but you make it work.Â
Itâs too cold out tonight to do that and Logan doesnât have a spare tank for the heating. Heâd thought heâd had enough for a cheap room for tonight, but clearly, he doesnât. Thereâs a tense silence in the truck as you mentally debate saying anything to him.Â
His fists are wrapped so tightly around the steering wheel you can hear it creaking. You shift, sitting up straighter in your seat and uncurling your legs. Thereâs a stiffness to your joints that has you groaning. Itâs involuntary, ripped out of you simply because youâve been sitting for too long.Â
It catches Loganâs attention and he glances over at you. Thereâs a resigned sort of guilt on his face and it makes you feel sick to your stomach. Heâs used to this type of lifestyle, and sometimes you think heâs embarrassed to share it with you.Â
Youâd never judge him for roadside motels or living off cheap gas station meals. You know you were privileged living up with the wealth you did. But there is something infinitely more satisfying about being poor and happy than there ever was being rich and miserable.
âLook, kid,â he lets out a heavy sigh and you mentally prepare yourself for what youâve been expecting. You were a fun time, a nice ride, but youâre becoming a burden and he canât deal with it anymore.Â
You let your nails dig into the thin skin of your palms so you can attempt to ground yourself. âI need to make some money tonight, so I just need you to bear with me for a while.â
Like there is every time he doesnât boot you to the curb, a relieved rush of air expels from your chest almost violently. âOkay,â you say tentatively, the word dragging out while you try and understand his meaning.Â
âI just,â he stops and it looks like heâs struggling to find the words to say to you. You wait patiently for him to finish, or try to at least. âThereâs a bar nearby. Iâll find some work there,â his words are ominous. They give you nothing and convey so much.Â
Clearly, heâs hiding something from you. You can tell that much from the way heâs avoiding eye contact with you. He pulls out of the motelâs parking lot and turns the radio on. Youâve learned that's his way of telling you he doesnât want to talk without being a dick about it.Â
You want to respect his space because you still feel like an imposter. But itâs hard. Heâs being oddly cagey about this.Â
The drive is short but it feels like youâve been transported to an entirely different town than the one you were in before. He takes only backroads and middle-class homes turn into shady shops with barbed fences. Caged dogs bark at the truck as it drives by and you get a sinking feeling in your gut.Â
Perhaps itâs a little classist of you to automatically assume a few low-end homes equate to a bad neighborhood. But instinctually you know something is off about this place.Â
He parks in front of a run-down bar. Even from here, you can hear loud shouts and jeering coming from inside. You donât know whatâs being said but theyâre certainly passionate. Logan turns towards you, the expression on his face so serious you feel like youâre about to be scolded.Â
âI need you to stay here. I wonât be gone long, just an hour at most. But you need to stay in the truck.â
Your jaw gapes and you scoff at him. âLogan, an hour thatâs rid-â
He cuts you off with a stern call of your name. Your mouth snaps shut and you narrow your eyes at him, teeth gritting together to keep your tongue at bay. âStay here, I mean it. Got it?â
You nod and he repeats your name, sounding aggrieved. âFine,â you huff. âI got it.â He lingers for a moment. You donât know if he doesnât trust you or is just reluctant to leave you alone. Youâre reluctant to be left alone, especially in a shady dark parking lot like this. But clearly whatever is going on inside is worse than whatever could happen to you out here.Â
âIâll be back soon,â he makes this whole thing sound so grave. It makes your brows furrow and doubt churn in your gut. What could he be doing in there thatâs so awful?
He gets out and you watch his form under the flickering street lamps until you canât see him anymore. You sit quietly in the truck for at least three minutes before you already feel the boredom set in.Â
Youâd thought youâd be able to last longer. You used to go for hours dissociating at your fatherâs galas. This is different, though. Youâre a little afraid to let your guard down here.Â
You try to listen to music but you feel bad wasting his gas so you just turn the truck off and huddle under a blanket in the trailer. You try and let yourself fall asleep but you donât last long.Â
Itâs too cold outside to really get a good rest and you can hear people moving around outside the trailer. After about an hour of rolling around and frozen limbs, you figure enough is enough.Â
As much as you donât want to provoke Logan or give him any reason to get rid of you, you canât stay in here all night. Besides, Logan said he wouldnât be long, you can always just lie and say you were worried about him.Â
Satisfied with your excuse you leave the comfort of your blanket behind and slip into Loganâs jacket. You tuck the truck keys in your pocket and walk out into the snowy night. Itâs less cold outside than it was in the trailer, you can see why he wanted a motel room for the night.Â
A few people linger by the cars, smoking and muttering to themselves. You slip past them, ignoring the feeling of their eyes burning into your skin. Youâre sure it's because you look like you donât belong here.Â
The noise in the bar gets louder the closer you get and it reminds you of the night Logan had snuck you out of the house. But youâd had him to lean on, right now, until you find him, youâre on your own. For all the noise coming from the building, the bar is surprisingly empty.Â
Only a few old men are sitting around, drinking beers in silence. The bartender cleans glasses behind the counter, sparing you an odd look before getting back to work. Thereâs not very far for you to look before you figure out that Logan isnât anywhere nearby.Â
âExcuse me?â The bartender spares you a fleeting glance before barely grunting in greeting.Â
The floor underneath you tremors and you glance down at it in surprise. You can hear something going on underneath. You figure that has to be where all the noises are coming from. âIâm looking for someone. Tall, mean as hell, heâs got this hair,â you swoop your hands up by the sides of your head, trying to mimic the odd fluff of Loganâs hair.Â
âDownstairs.â You nod and move around the bar, trying to get to the door behind him. He reaches out, grabbing your bicep and stopping you before you can get far. âIt's a forty-dollar entrance fee, sweetheart.â
Your brow furrows in confusion and you frown as you dig around in your jacket pockets. Youâve come too far to be deterred now. Ignoring the moral implications, you slip Loganâs wallet out of his jacket and give the man forty dollars.Â
He nods towards the door and you give him a weak thank you as you slip past him. Opening the door is like breaking a seal. The noises bombard you almost immediately, so much clearer than they were before.Â
You still canât understand what theyâre screaming but thereâs a violent atmosphere slipping around you as you head down the stairs. The heady smell of cigars and cigarettes threatens to suffocate you. Your eyes water at the smoke in the air.Â
Youâd think youâd have gotten used to secondhand smoking after being around Logan, but heâs less inclined to hotbox the car if youâre beside him. The second your feet hit the floor youâre being jostled to the side violently by the people around you.Â
Itâs nearly impossible to elbow your way through the crowd, but youâre determined to figure out whatâs in the middle of the cage thatâs got them all excited. You can hear the people around you screaming out bets and numbers you donât understand.Â
For one nauseating moment, you think this might be a dog fighting ring, that Logan gambles on it to earn his money. It makes you want to turn around, to shield yourself from the truth. But this is something he tried to keep hidden from you and you need to know the truth about whoever youâre traveling with.Â
You can hear the announcer, but you canât get close enough to see anything yet. âAre you gonna let this man walk away with your money?â Thereâs a resounding NO! from the crowd that makes you jump.Â
A booming voice shouts over the throng of voices, âIâll take him!âÂ
âOur savior ladies and gentlemen!â You shove through two men, ignoring the way they complain about how their beer sloshes on their sleeves.Â
âHey-â You glance over your shoulder as one of them reaches for you. You flick your wrist, sending him and his friend tumbling back into the crowd. You roll your eyes and turn back towards the cage.Â
Your eyes widen and so do Loganâs as you finally see what exactly is going on. Heâs cage fighting, this is what heâd been so secretive about. Honestly, itâs a relief compared to the brutality you were bracing yourself for.Â
You can see his lips starting to form the shape of your name but the man from before is barrelling into his side as the bell goes off. You wince, jumping away from the cage as you hear the meaty impact of his fist against Loganâs face.Â
The people near you scream, shouting for Loganâs blood. Itâs easy to figure out that heâs been beating everyone heâs gone up against based on some bloody faces in the crowd. Itâs smart, easy money. He can always heal, and can never really be beaten, not when heâs literally got fists of steel.Â
Youâre surprised that no oneâs ever caught onto this scam of his. You also wonder why he had been so adamant about you not seeing this. Sure, itâs brutal watching blood spray against the mat. But you donât care. Besides, heâs ridiculously attractive in just his jeans as he pummels into some guy.Â
Maybe thatâs not a normal line of thinking.Â
You shake your head, shelving that for later as the fight dies down. The man is limp on the mat of the cage and Logan is leaning against the wall, smoking a cigar and pointedly not looking at you.Â
You feel that familiar twisting feeling in your stomach and wonder if this was a horrible idea. You should have just stayed in the car like he asked. Youâre sure it would have only been another hour of tirelessly rolling around before he came back. But you couldnât help yourself.Â
He tells you so little about himself. If you get a chance to learn more, youâre going to pounce on the opportunity. Maybe it was a violation of his trust. You sincerely doubt that he would ever willingly have revealed this sort of lifestyle to you, though.Â
He seems to be under the same misguided intention that you need to be sheltered. It reminds you a little of your father. That might be a cruel comparison but itâs the same suffocating feeling of being kept in the dark to suit their needs.Â
The guilt youâd been holding unfurls and blossoms into anger. You find yourself retreating away from the cage and rushing back up the stairs of the bar. You donât want to watch him fight any longer. You donât want to look at him.Â
You just want him to treat you like an equal. Not like some little girl whoâs going to run at the first sign of things getting hard.Â
You burst through the door of the bar, ignoring the cold laughter of the bartender behind you. He clearly seemed to think you couldnât handle a little blood. He wasnât the only one.Â
Youâre only a couple of feet from the truck when you hear footsteps loudly stomping through the snow behind you. âWhat the hell were you doing?â You scoff, unbelieving that he would have the gall to shout at you.Â
You whirl around on him and it catches him off guard. His right foot slides against the slush as he tries to stop himself from ramming into you. âIâm not a little girl, Logan! You donât need to hide stuff like that from me.â
He crosses his arms and glares down at you. âI wasnât hiding anything,â he insists. But the tone of his voice gives him away. He doesnât like that he was caught. âI donât need to tell you jackshit about what I do for money.â
You canât believe how he sounds right now. Why is he getting so defensive about this? âI donât care what you do for money, alright. I just donât get why you felt like I couldnât know about this.â You hate the way the hurt is audible in your voice. You wear your heart on your sleeve, even when you try and cover it.Â
In the same way, heâs masking his feelings with anger, so are you. Just with less success. Something draws across his face, some emotion you canât discern. His voice goes cold and quiet as he shoves an envelope full of cash into your hands.Â
âGo back to the motel. Get a room.â
He storms past you and walks towards the trailer. You follow after him, slightly dumbfounded by how heâs behaving. He rips his motorcycle out from the back and rolls it into a parking spot. You watch him do all this with your tongue glued to the roof of your mouth.Â
Itâs only when he starts to head back towards the bar that you realize heâs not coming with you. âLogan!â You call out, trailing after him slightly. He barely turns back to face you. âAre you,â the words die on your tongue and you canât find it in yourself to finish.Â
Are you angry?
Are you leaving?
Are you going to ditch me at the next bus stop?
Instead of asking any of your ridiculously pining questions, you turn on your heel and storm towards the truck. You rip the door open with more force than necessary and drive off without looking back at him. But you know he watches, know he keeps an eye on you until he canât see you anymore.Â
Your rides with him are normally silent, but this one feels painfully so.Â
You nearly get a room with two beds. But you feel like if you do it will be a horrendous mistake. Reluctantly, you give the man behind the counter enough for a room with one bed large enough for the both of you.Â
Youâre not exactly excited about sharing a bed with him, not after how he behaved tonight. You grumble to yourself as you drag your bag inside and toss it on the ground. You picture putting up a wall of pillows between the two of you, just to be petty.Â
Itâs as youâre showering that you realize you might not even have to. He might not come to join you tonight. He wonât know what room youâre in. And heâd made it pretty clear how pissed he was at you for sneaking into the bar.Â
Maybe youâve finally pushed him too far. Youâve been toying with the boundaries of his patience for a while. Little tests to determine whether he truly wants you around simply to have a warm body ready beside him. Or if he wants you because he genuinely cares for you.Â
You suppose tonight, whether you want it or not, youâll finally have the truth.Â
The thought keeps you awake. You toss and you turn for hours, fighting with yourself. You should be happy, finally figuring out whatâs been haunting you. But youâre not. Youâre petrified. Youâd rather keep living a lie than finally accept that he truly doesnât want you.Â
You throw the covers off, the scratchy material only further adding to your irritation. You stomp into the bathroom, slamming the door closed behind you. You turn on the sink splashing some cool water over your face to try and rid yourself of the warmth lingering under your skin. You donât know if this feeling of being uncomfortable in your own body is from pent-up anger or anxiety.Â
You donât care. You just want to sleep this night away and pretend it never happened. But, of course, the universe has other plans. The motel door creaks open as youâre hovering over the sink, debating whether or not youâre nauseous enough to throw up.Â
You tilt your head slightly towards the sound. Growing up in your house, filtering through rooms like an unheard ghost, allowed you to get good at recognizing footsteps. Logan has finally decided to grace you with his presence.Â
You listen to him as he creeps silently across the room, landing on the squeaky bed. You press your ear against the door and can hear the way the sheets rustle and he cusses under his breath. Thereâs worry staining his voice and you figure you shouldnât drag this on much longer.Â
You open the bathroom door and flip the switch, turning the lamps on like a disappointed mother waiting up for her teenager. You cross your arms mutely and lean against the doorframe as he winces under the sudden light.Â
He jumps, just slightly, and glares over at you. âThought you werenât here,â he accuses. He tries sounding angry, but you have a sudden rush of clarity in that moment. Where you would normally focus only on him being upset with you, you can see the truth of his concern.
Same as you, he doesnât know where he stands in this whole situation. You doubt he had a clear plan when he rescued you from your tower like some ridiculous storybook knight. He most likely thought that you left, the same way you thought he would.Â
You remain silent, though, still a little too flustered to speak coherently. Instead, you examine him. There are cuts and blood all over his shirt. Splatters of it on his face. Though, you know if you looked there would be no physical evidence of him ever being hurt.Â
His brows furrow the longer you stare, a wall building between the two of you. âKid?â He questions, equal parts worried and defensive. Does he really think you actually give a fuck about him fighting?
You shake your head and walk back into the bathroom. You rustle around in the cabinet underneath the sink until you find a washcloth. Wetting it, you bring it back out to him. You station yourself between his spread legs, holding the cloth between you like a peace offering.Â
He looks doubtful as he glances between you and it. Finally, he lets out a rough sigh and simply nods his head. But when he reaches for it you snatch it back, much to his chagrin. You offer him a small smile and tilt his chin up towards you, gently wiping some of the dried blood off his cheeks.Â
He doesnât flinch or hiss away from the less-than-gentle fabric. He stares at you unblinkingly, like if he closes his eyes for a moment heâll wake up and this will all have been a dream. âYou donât have to do this, kid.â
You roll your eyes and crane your neck to get a better look at him. âWould you shut up?â You whisper teasingly.Â
His lips quirk slightly and you can see his shoulder slump in relief at the sound of your voice. âSo, she can talk.â You canât help the little laugh that comes out of you. He grins fully at that and his hands come up to rest on your hips.Â
His thumbs rub soothing circles along the sides of your waist as his hands dip a little lower. âWhat are you doing?â Your hand drifts down to his neck to wipe some blood off there as well.Â
He shakes his head and shrugs, âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
You lift your gaze to his and your lips fall flat, âLogan-â
He cuts you off before you can finish. In one smooth motion, his hands drop to wrap around your thighs. He lifts you slightly and drops you onto his lap. He grins at the slight huff of surprise that rushes out of you.Â
His arms go back to your waist, pulling you closer to him and grinding you a little against him. You bite your lip to stop any noises from escaping. As much as you wouldnât mind what heâs thinking, you need to talk.Â
âLogan,â you scold.Â
He smirks and tilts his head patronizingly, âSomething wrong, sweetheart?â
âItâs not happening,â you tell him firmly, hand still working on cleaning him.Â
He sighs and one of his arms drops away from you. He cups your hand in his, stilling your movements and forcing you to meet his gaze. Gently, he takes the cloth from you and tosses it somewhere you canât see. âIâm fine,â he whispers, eyes searching yours.Â
Itâs hard meeting his gaze. The worry and anxiety from the night still weigh heavily on your shoulders. He repeats himself, fingers tilting your chin up to face him. âAlright?â
âI donât care,â the words come rushing out of you before you can stop them. His brows raise in shock and he gives a slight chuckle of amusement. A lump grows in your throat and your eyes grow wide. âWait, I donât mean-â
You cut yourself off and rub your hands over your face, trying to get your head on right. Loganâs patient, rubbing your back and clearly trying not to laugh at you. You finally take in a deep breath and face him again.Â
âI donât care about the fighting,â you can see his shoulders tense slightly like he doesnât believe you. âI donât care, Logan. You do what you have to survive and Iâm not gonna judge you for that.â
âWhat if I enjoy it?â He cuts you off, tone harsh as he glares down at you. There's experience in how quickly he doubts you, how quickly he tries to get you to change your mind about him.
You wonder how many times heâs been rejected just for being a mutant. Youâve only ever been rejected by one person because only he ever knew. Your father. And that hurt enough for one lifetime.Â
You canât imagine going for as long as he has and constantly being called a monster for something he canât control. Your brows furrow and you lean into him until your lips are brushing. He remains stiff beneath you but you donât let it deter you.Â
âI donât care,â you tell him, pressing your lips to his before slowly pulling back. You wait for him to respond, physically or verbally, but heâs still looking at you with that cold unfamiliar gaze.Â
You wonder if maybe it was a mistake, to bring it up at all. But just as the thought comes heâs surging forward. His lips catch yours, his hands digging so desperately into your shirt you know it rips.Â
Your arms go to his neck, holding onto him so you donât slip off his lap. You haven't been this close for a few days. You think it might have made you both feel on edge. Thereâs a relief that comes from not just having sex with him, but also just being intimate and close to one another.Â
Itâs a reminder that youâre not alone, that thereâs someone here beside you to be a partner and a pillar of stability. Youâve never had that before. Someone that you can rely on and trust fully. You donât think he has either.Â
He craves you the same way you do him. Each kiss, every shared breath, is treated like it will be your last. You donât know when your father will finally catch up to the two of you. You donât know when the police might finally recognize Logan.Â
Thereâs no definitive future for either of you. Itâs a real possibility that this could be your last night together. And neither of you wants to be upset with each other. Because you were never truly mad. You were always just worried.Â
Your hands drop to his shirt, dipping to find the holes in it from his fight and ripping at the flimsy fabric until you can just yank it off. He smiles against your lips at the eager way you move atop him. But he canât tease you, heâs already annoyed with the buttons on your shirt.Â
He pulls back, glaring down at the fabric like it's insulting him. Without another word, he slices through it, leaving it in tatters on your shoulder. You grin, shrugging the rest of it off. âThat was yours.â
He grips your hips tightly and leaves marks where his fingers are as a reminder that he was here. He flips you over, leaves you breathless as he hovers over you. âI really donât give a fuck, sweetheart.â
Youâre addicted to his voice. How breathy and desperate it is when heâs with you. Itâs a level of vulnerability you rarely get to see from him. He canât hide himself when heâs with you like this. He wants you just as badly as you do him.Â
It gives you a confidence rush like no other, makes your ego grow ten times its size. If you can make a man like this fall to his knees from nothing more than a kiss, then youâre capable of a lot more than you give yourself credit for.Â
But you donât want that tonight. You reach for him before he can go much further, grabbing him by his hair and tugging until you know it stings. He nearly fucking moans at your rough touch, eyes fluttering open to meet yours. The green of them has been wholly consumed by his desire for you and it makes you ache for him.Â
âNot tonight,â you tell him. Thereâs no room for argument in your tone. As much as he might want to taste you, devour you, all you want is to be as close to him as possible. You want to be covered and filled by him in every way you can be.Â
His head falls against your thigh, a rough groan tumbling from his throat at your words. You drag him towards you, pulling him up your body until youâre face to face. You smile softly up at him, lifting your head so you can meet his lips again.Â
Youâll never get enough of kissing him, of tasting him. Sometimes you have to stop yourself from reaching across the seats and kissing him while he drives. Youâve nearly made him wreck a few times and forced him to pull over so you could both have some fun in the back.Â
Addiction isnât the right word for what you feel for him. It brings along its own negative connotations. The taint of dependency and toxicity. With addiction, itâs a parasitic relationship, hurts you but makes you feel good.Â
This is just goodness. This is a kind touch for the first time in your life and finally feeling safe in someone elses arms. This is opening yourself up to him fully and not once feeling like you need to mold yourself into something else to make him happy. Itâs accepting him as he is, a broken dog who likes to fight to punish himself. You donât want to change him or make him âbetter.â You just want him to be happy.Â
You use your powers to help yourself, flipping him over and straddling his hips. You drag his jeans down his legs and flick your wrist, sending them flying somewhere across the room. He watches you with eyes filled with awe, hands drifting over your curves like something to be worshipped.Â
You know heâs waiting for it, for you to sink yourself down on him and finally be filled. But you wait, hover over him even as the muscles of your thighs tremor. âYou donât hide things from me anymore,â you warn him. Youâre not asking, for once, youâre demanding what you want.Â
He doesnât look angry like youâd been expecting. Instead, it only seems to turn him on more. âYa know,â his hands drift to your hips, dragging you down and over his cock until itâs wet with your want. Your nails dig into his chest until thereâs blood beading under them and youâre trying not to let your noises slip out.Â
âI kinda like it when youâre all bossy like this.âÂ
âLogan,â you grit his name out. It takes everything in you not to look as affected by him as you feel. âNo more hiding shit.â
He leans up on his elbows. His hand drifts to the nape of your neck and drags you down until your lips are nearly touching his. âYeah, I got it, sweetheart.â
Like a taut rope being cut, you sink into him, your hips finally drop and he guides you down every inch of him until you feel like youâre so full you canât breathe. He lets you linger for a moment, and get used to this feeling while he steals the very air from your lungs.Â
Heâs greedy with the way he touches you. His hands always moving like heâll never fully be satisfied with how much of you he can feel. Heâs always reaching for you like he needs to make sure youâre actually real and not just something heâs dreamt up.Â
Even with how impatient he is, youâre always the one that moves first. You roll your hips over him, moaning at how he feels inside you. Itâs like heâs perfectly molded you around him. He always manages to brush against the spots that make your eyes roll into the back of your head.Â
The second your hips begin to roll, heâs wrapping his heavy arms around you, grinding you down into him. He keeps you trapped in place, using you like a toy as he bounces you on his lap. Your mind is fuzzy, every bad thought and feeling shoved out while he makes you go dumb on his dick.
You love how boneless you go. You donât have to think now, donât have to worry. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, shifting yourself further on top of him until you're practically burying yourself under his skin.Â
Not thinking always comes with its own consequences, though. Your powers slip a little out of your grasp. The walls trembling and the drawers and cabinets opening and closing. The both of you have gotten used to the noise, know how to drown it out, and just focus on each other.Â
One of these days, youâll need to figure out a way to have sex with him without bringing the room down around you. Thatâs a problem for later though. His whispered praises and grunts of your name filter through your mind until thereâs nothing left inside you but him.Â
âFuck,â he hisses in your ear, âyouâre so fucking tight around me. You close?â He grunts, hand drifting down to rub tight circles on your clit. You dig your nails into his shoulders, nodding your head frantically against his neck. âWords, sweetheart.â
âShit,â you can barely think of your own damn name. Let alone what you want from him. âFuck off,â you hiss. He chuckles at the attitude and you almost expect him to stop, just to be a dick because you were a brat.Â
But heâs just as close as you are and heâs too selfish to tease. Wave after wave of pleasure crashes down on you as your body shakes against his. He follows quickly after you, warmth shooting up inside you and almost leaking down your thighs. You feel stuffed, like your bodyâs been pushed to the limit and further.Â
You both sit together in silence for a while. You ignore the way your skin sticks to his uncomfortably, instead reveling in the warmth he provides you. Anyone else, and youâd be rushing to get away from them.Â
Youâre always extra sensitive after sex, every little thing setting you off. But thereâs a comfort to the way his hairy ass chest brushes against your breasts and his arms squeeze around you. Itâs a nice grounding feeling.Â
The tips of your fingers drift over his arms, following the path of his veins and brushing against his fingers lazily. He flips his palm over, encasing your hand in his own wordlessly. Little things like that ease your worries. Makes you feel like something more than just a quick fuck.Â
He breaks the silence first, which is rare for him. âIâm sorry about tonight.â
You frown and peer up at him. âI told you, I donât care about the fighting.â
He sighs and shakes his head, âNot that. I shouldnât have gotten so fucking mad at you. You didnât do anything wrong.â You want to interrupt him, assure him that you both acted pretty childishly.Â
But you understand itâs difficult for him to express himself verbally. He usually prefers silent acts of apologies and expression, you donât want to mess him up before he can get out what he wants to say.Â
âI donât want to be like your father.â Your face screws up a little and you shift uncomfortably on his lap. He loosens his grip, giving you room to leave if you want to, but you stay put. âIâm trying not to coddle you, sweetheart, or hide you away from the world. But I donât like you seeing that shit.â
âYouâre not my dad, Logan. He wouldnât give me a choice,â you try and joke but it just seems to make him more irritated. Sighing you straighten up, bracing yourself on his chest and staring down at him.Â
Your head tilts to the side in contemplation and he almost looks uncomfortable under the attention. âIâm not so fragile or sheltered that Iâm going to shatter at the first taste of the real world, Logan. I mean, for godâs sake, Iâve had acid thrown at me and bodyguards since I could walk. I know how dangerous it is. Whatever you want to hide from me, Iâve seen worse.â
You let your words sink in for a moment and he looks at you like heâs seeing you for the first time. You know that itâs odd for him, to comprehend a girl who was afraid to go into a bar swallowing down an illegal fighting ring like itâs nothing. But youâre not lying. Everyday little things are what youâre unused to. But youâve lived alongside violence your whole life.Â
âLook, fighting, sleeping in shitty motels, and your truck, that doesn't bother me. But I donât like when you hide things and I donât,â you take in a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself for the worst. This is what youâve been trying to tell him for weeks.Â
A few little words have your tongue tied and make you desperate to cover yourself up again. He can see the shift in your expression, and feel how tense you get. He sits up a little more, thumb rubbing soothing circles over the back of your hand.Â
âI donât want to just be someone to fuck you, Logan. I didnât come with you so youâd have easy access pussy,â he looks thoroughly amused at your crude words, but thereâs something else lingering in his expression. Something like hurt.Â
âIs that what you think?â He asks, tone distant. You canât find the words so you simply nod. He sighs and shakes his head. He eases you off his lap and you worry youâve truly fucked this up somehow.Â
He goes into the bathroom, returns with a wet washcloth. He still doesnât speak and youâre on edge the entire time he cleans the both of you up. You can see heâs thinking, biting his tongue, and trying to figure out what it is that he wants to say to you.Â
Youâre impatient, five seconds away from just demanding a response from him. He tosses the cloth and drops into bed beside you. You draw the sheets up to your chest, glaring down at him while he rubs his hands over his face with a tired sigh.Â
When he opens his eyes again he laughs at how close you are. âJesus,â he wraps an arm around your waist, dragging you down into his chest even though you fight him. It must be easier for him to speak when youâre not staring at him.Â
âI didnât go back for you so I could fuck you, kid. I⊠care about you,â thereâs a long pause before he says the word care. You think itâs funny, that he canât bring himself to admit what he actually feels. But youâll take it, youâll give him the time he needs to come to terms with the truth.Â
For now, you let yourself fall asleep, feeling just a little bit better about the road ahead.Â
Things get easier between the two of you. And somehow harder at the same time. You donât walk on eggshells around each other, no longer afraid of scaring the other off now. Which also means that you find it easier to bicker with him about little things. Like, not just tossing his trash everywhere in the truck. Youâre practically living out of the trailer, the least he could do is help you keep it tidy.Â
You know itâs weird for him. Suddenly having someone nag at him not to be a slob or to take breaks in between driving so he doesnât wear himself out. Itâs an adjustment you see him struggle with sometimes.Â
You try not to be too pushy, but thereâs only so many times you can flick crumbs from his burgers off your seat before you lose it. âLogan!â You snap, glaring at him as you stand up only to find chip crumbs squished into the fabric of your leggings.Â
He glances over at you and shrugs, âWhat?âÂ
You glance between the crumbs and him with a glare but he doesnât seem to be connecting the dots. âFucks sake,â you grumble, passive-aggressively wiping the truck seat off before you slam the door and storm towards the diner.Â
Youâre sick of being cramped in the truck. Youâre sick of the greasy food. Youâve begun to crave salads lately. Which is beyond weird. But the novelty of shitty food and milkshakes wore off a hundred miles ago.Â
Logan catches up to you, huffing with irritation as he swings the door open for you. You take a seat in the booth near the corner, snatching up the menu and pointedly staring at it and not him. âReally?â He demands. When you donât answer he tips the menu down, forcing you to meet his gaze. âWhat is your problem?â He hisses, trying not to draw attention to you both.Â
You lean in, voice a harsh whisper. âHow hard is it to just not make a mess? We live out of that damn truck, the least you could do is keep your crumbs on your side.â
He rolls his eyes and leans back in the booth. Youâre both sick of having the same fight. But thereâs really nothing else to do anymore. When youâre stuck together for so long, itâs the small things that get to you.Â
Youâre going to say more but the waitress pops in front of you out of nowhere. âHi!â She beams and gives you her name, the bows in her hair trembling at how hyper she is. âWhat can I get you both today?â
You and Logan place your orders, and he shoots you an odd look when you only order the salad. âWeâve got a couple more hours ahead of us, youâre gonna get hungry.â
You cross your arms and shrug, âNo, I wonât.â
He licks his lips, sucking on his teeth and leaning against the table. âYes, you will,â he argues with a stern voice.Â
You narrow your eyes at him and give him a bitter smile. âKiss. My. Ass.â
Your stomach grumbles for the third time and you know that Logan can hear it. Youâre pointedly not making eye contact with him. It feels like it's louder than the music at this point and you really donât want to prove him right.Â
Without a word, he begins to dig around in the center console. You glance towards him, confused, âWhatâre you doing?â
He doesnât say anything, just tosses whatever heâs grabbed onto your lap. You glance down at it and frown. Itâs somehow cold as you unwrap it. You pull the parchment paper away and let out a relieved sigh.Â
He ordered you a wrap from the diner without you realizing. You take a bite, your hunger steadily easing away. âIâm sorry,â you mutter, pointedly looking out the window.Â
He glances over at you and scoffs. âWhat was that? Couldnât hear ya, kid.âÂ
You roll your eyes and turn to glare at him. Heâs already looking at you, a teasing tilt to his lips. âI said Iâm sorry,â you snap. âI shouldnât have been a bitch.â
He shakes his head and waves you off. âI havenât exactly been pleasant myself. Iâll,â he huffs lowly and forces the words out, âclean up more.â Â
âI think weâve just been stuck on the road too long. Weâre gonna end up driving each other insane.â
His eyes glance along the signs on the highway. Thereâs a notice for food and shopping at the next exit and he nods towards it. âWeâll stop at a motel for a few nights. Take a break.â You want to ask him if heâs sure thatâs smart.Â
It seems risky, to slow down for so long. But you need to walk around, breathe fresh air, and stretch your legs. Youâre too selfish to tell him not to stop and keep going. Instead, you nod and smile at him. âThat sounds really nice.â
He gives you a slight smile thatâs gone as quickly as it came, reaching over and resting his hand on your thigh. You move closer to him and he turns the radio up. You wonder why he doesnât want to talk anymore but you donât push it. Youâre too excited to finally get out of the truck again.Â
The town is nice enough. Itâs small, with only a few shops where you buy some new shirts to replace oneâs that Logan has torn up. The motel youâre staying at doesnât have a washing machine so you have to use the laundromat to wash your clothes.Â
Logan says heâs going to see if he can find a quick job nearby. You wonder if that means a real job or a more bloody one. You decide not to ask questions, instead taking the little change you have and figuring youâll try to get the smell of grease out of all your clothes.Â
As you load the machine up and put your quarters in you canât escape the feeling of someone watching you. Youâve been on high alert ever since Logan stole you away from the house. But this is different.Â
Youâve gotten used to your own paranoia, you know when itâs real or not. You walk away from the machine, glancing out at the glass walls near the front and trying to see if thereâs someone out there. This, oddly enough, doesnât feel like a police stakeout where theyâre going to track you back to the motel and bust Logan.Â
This is something different. There is a deep-seated primal fear in you that makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up. Your heart races as your eyes search the dark street outside. What little glow comes from the streetlights isnât enough for you to clearly make anything out.Â
But you feel them, tracking your every move. Theyâre somewhere nearby, you canât see them but they see you. You feel sick to your stomach. You glance at the door before racing towards it. You turn the lock, slowly backing away and keeping your eyes trained on the street.Â
You look into the shadows and find shapes and movements where there are none. Your eyes spin as your brain crafts a horrible image of some monster waiting outside for you. When the timer for the washer goes off you let out a sharp scream, spinning around and clutching your chest as you glare at it.Â
âFuckâs sake,â you mutter, angrily running your hand over your face and trying to catch your breath. You put the clothes in the dryer and by the time you're done, the feeling is gone. You donât know if they were never there to begin with, or if they got bored and left.Â
Youâd told Logan that you didnât need a ride, youâd just walk the short distance back to the motel. Now, you use the phone on the front counter and call him, telling him youâve changed your mind after all.Â
By the time he picks you up, he looks incredibly concerned. You know you sounded panicked when you called him. You still feel upset about the whole thing. But when he asks whatâs wrong you just tell him you got a little scared walking back in the dark.Â
You donât tell him someone was watching you because you know heâll make you pack up and leave again. You want some stability. Even if it's just for a week. So, as stupid as it is, you lie to him and say everythingâs fine.Â
When you try to go to sleep that night you feel like youâre being watched again. Even with the curtains closed their eyes burn into you. You toss and turn under the heavy weight of the sheets, struggling to get comfortable.Â
Thereâs a low grumble behind you before Logan throws his arm over your waist and tugs you back into his chest. âStop movinâ around,â he demands, his voice barely audible. You smile a little at how tired he sounds before forcing yourself to settle down.Â
He doesnât give you much choice, using his body as a weight to keep you pinned. You still feel their gaze, even more now, but his proximity brings you enough comfort to get a little bit of restless sleep.Â
Loganâs up before you, he always is. He comes in with cheap coffee and free breakfast from the lounge. You push the sheets off your legs, your shirt sticking to your back from the cold sweat of your nervous sleeping. You feel a little more at ease this morning.Â
You wonder if youâre developing some late-in-life fear of the dark. You donât know why you were so upset last night, you feel perfectly fine now. Itâs almost like it was all one bad dream. Logan walks over, handing you the coffee wordlessly and rustling around in your bag for something.Â
He pulls out the envelope of cash you keep stashed away and frowns at the contents. âFound a job,â he mutters, stuffing the envelope away and turning back towards you. He leans against the desk, face pensive.Â
You rub your eyes, trying to wake yourself up a bit more so you sound coherent. âWhat is it?â You take a sip of the coffee and your face screws up at the aftertaste.Â
âFighting,â his tone is clipped and you wonder whatâs got him up in arms. He walks past you, heading into the bathroom, and closing the door behind him. You tilt your head, gaze following him curiously. He doesnât normally close the door, he usually likes to invite you to join him.Â
Something happened and you wonder if heâs hiding the same thing you are. You close your eyes, taking in a deep breath and closing your mind off to the fear from last night.Â
By the time Logan is done in the bathroom, youâre feeling more awake. You canât just dismiss what happened last night. Youâve never gotten scared like that before. You refuse to ignore your instincts, but youâre also not going to let whoever that was terrify you into going back on the road.Â
You donât want things between you and Logan to grow more tense than they already are. The time away from each other yesterday helped a lot. You no longer want to strangle him when you hear him breathe. Youâll just stick closer to him today and see if you feel the eyes on you again tonight.Â
âSo,â you start, testing the waters to see if heâs still in a bad mood. He glances over at you, eyebrows quirked in curiosity but youâre tongue-tied as you stare at him. However many weeks youâve been with him and youâre never gonna get used to seeing him straight out of the shower.Â
The towel is draped low on his hips, giving you a taunting look at what lies underneath the white cloth. Droplets drip down his abs and youâve never wanted to be water more than you do right now. Itâs unfair, just how attractive he is.Â
You always forget what youâre going to say. You canât think when he has a shirt off, itâs infuriating. Scoffing, you turn away from him and shake your head. You hear him chuckle, you know he knows what youâre thinking about.Â
âWhatâs wrong?â He creeps up behind you, arms wrapping around your waist and tugging you back into his chest.Â
âLogan, dammit,â water soaks into the back of your shirt uncomfortably and you tilt your head to glare at him.Â
He smirks down at you, âCat got your tongue, kid?â
You roll your eyes and push away from him. âI canât even remember what I was going to say.â You snatch a shirt from the dresser and shove it into his hands. âPut this on.â
He scoffs and gives you a disbelieving look. âAre you serious?â You wait for him, gaze expectant. Youâre not gonna be able to think when he looks like this. Sighing, he acquieses and tugs the shirt on. His lips fall into a sarcastic line, âHappy?â
Like a switch being flipped you finally remember what you were going to ask him. âThe job you told me about. Where is it?â
You can see on his face how little he wants to divulge that information to you. But you know heâs going to tell you. You two made a deal not to hide things, although, you might be breaking your side of that right now.Â
âSome shitty bar a few miles from here. Listen-â
Youâre not gonna like it.Â
I donât want you tagging along.Â
You should just stay here and read or some shit.
You wonder which one heâll pick today. âYou wouldnât like it, itâs just a shitty little place where I can make some quick cash.â Look at that, itâs rarely ever your first pick excuse. You must be getting better at reading him.Â
âIâll come with you,â you tell him because youâre not asking. Youâre not staying by yourself tonight and you both need the money. You grin at him even as his face falls in disappointment. âMaybe Iâll fight.â
He doesnât even say anything and you immediately regret what you said. The look heâs giving you would put you six feet under if it could. âIt was just a joke,â you mutter.
âWasnât funny, kid,â he tells you, tone clipped as he moves around you to grab his jeans. âI donât even want you in those places, let alone fuckinâ fighting.â
You purse your lips and take a seat on the bed, handing him his jacket when he begins looking for it. âI have abilities too, you know. Maybe I could win a fight.â
âDonât,â he snaps. âI win because I can take the hits people deal me. You canât,â you donât bother arguing with him that you heal too. You understand what he means. You might be able to recover physically, but thereâs a mental aspect to being knocked on the ground. Thereâs humiliation and fear in cage fights, you probably wouldnât be able to handle that side of it.Â
He waits for you to say anything else but when he realizes youâve dropped the subject he lets out a relieved sigh. âYouâll stay in the truck,â he tries.Â
You give him a deadpan look, slipping the keys out of your purse and handing them to him. âNo way in hell, but Iâll stay by the bar if it makes you feel better.â He stays silent and nods but you know heâll try and convince you otherwise when you actually get to the place. Tough luck, though, you donât think itâs safe for either of you to be apart tonight. Even if itâs just staying in the truck.Â
The setup of these places is always the same. Though, this bar seems to be particularly disgusting in comparison to other ones youâve been to. You position yourself near the corner, your back to the wall so youâre less likely to be noticed in the crowd.Â
The fights never last more than a few minutes. And thatâs if Logan is feeling generous. Most of the time you only need to be here an hour before people get pissed off and go home. Someone bumps into you and you hear a small, âIâm sorry,â before they rush to claim a stool.Â
The crowdâs already begun to die out. Most leave while they still have a little money left in their pockets. You duck your head down, catching the eye of the girl whoâd bumped into you. She looks young and incredibly skittish. Her eyes keep darting to the tip jar near the bartender.Â
She quietly asks for water but the bartender just shakes his head, tugging the jar closer to him. You donât know why youâre drawn to her, maybe itâs because she looks like one of those sad pound puppies, but you take a seat beside her.Â
âWater,â you order, slipping him some change. When he gives it to you, you pass it off to her, spotting the greedy way she eyes it. You know a runaway when you see one, she clearly needs a little help. But Loganâs got enough on his shoulders, youâre not gonna bug him with adding another person to the mix.Â
âThank you,â she gulps it down like she hasnât drunk anything in days. You feel your stomach twist with empathy. What little cash you have in your wallet, you slip into her bag as you pass by her. Logan will have made enough for it to be spared and it's the least you can do.Â
Not everyone is as lucky as you to have someone help them navigate a new life.Â
Logan grabs his jacket, wiping blood off from under his nose and heading towards you. You know heâll want a drink before you go, he always does. Before he can say anything someoneâs shouting the name he uses in the cage. âHey, Wolverine! I want my fucking money back.â
The big man heâd knocked down earlier takes a step towards him. His friend tries to hold him back, but thereâs no stopping him. Heâs already had his ass kicked once, what makes him think this is going to be any different?
âNot your money anymore, bub.â Logan scoffs and turns back towards you. You just want to leave now. You donât want to stay for a drink or go get something to eat. You feel the eyes on you again, but when you turn to find them thereâs no one there but the girl.Â
And sheâs not looking at you. Her eyes are wide and staring at something else. âBehind you!â She screeches, and both you and Logan whirl around to find the man barreling towards him with a knife outstretched.Â
Logan moves so quickly that you stumble back slightly. He grabs the guy's arm, twisting his wrist until the knife drops to the ground. He shoves him back against the wall, claws out and pinning him there.
âShit,â you whisper, glancing around as the few patrons of the bar stare in horror at Logan. The people counting his money stop and tuck it back into the cash box. You clench your eyes shut in irritation, heâs not gonna be getting paid tonight, thatâs for sure.Â
Thereâs a strange noise behind you, like someone cocking a gun. You turn around slowly, gasping when you see the bartender pointing the barrel of his shotgun at your chest. Heâs not aiming it at Logan, heâs aiming it at you. Like he somehow knows thatâs the only way to get him to back off.Â
Itâs not like he was going to kill the guy, besides, he came at him with a knife first. Whatâs the difference if Loganâs a mutant? Heâs defending himself. Why does no one understand that?
âGet out of my bar,â the old man warns lowly, taking a step closer to you. Logan turns around and finally spots whatâs going on.Â
âPay me and Iâll be on my way.â You know youâd be able to heal from the shotgun blast, but you donât exactly want to go through it.Â
The old man laughs and shakes his head. âYouâre not getting paid, buddy. Get the fuck out of my bar before I put a hole in your little girlfriend.â
Your eyes narrow in disbelief. You debate with yourself for a moment, if this is smart or not. But the guyâs being a prick and youâre sick of people treating mutants like theyâre less than nothing. You flick your wrist and the shotgun goes flying out of his hand.Â
You glance over at the cashbox and it comes floating towards you, landing easily in your outstretched palm. âBe thankful Iâm not blowing a hole in you,â you warn, glaring at the cowering man. You walk forward and he stumbles back and you try not to focus on the sick feeling of satisfaction it brings you. You grab the tip jar and shove it towards the girl at the end of the bar. âGood luck, kid.â
Logan releases the man from the before, taking a step towards you. You feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand up and rush towards the exit of the bar. You need to just get the fuck out of this town as quickly as possible, youâre not safe here anymore.Â
Logan seems to agree with you. He gets into the truck and doesnât turn back to the motel. Instead, he turns onto the highway while you keep your eyes peeled on the trees outside your window. Thereâs someone out there, still following you.Â
âSomethingâs wrong with the suspension,â you glance up from where youâd been working on breaking open the cashbox and frown. Loganâs glaring down at the steering wheel, it seems like heâs struggling to get it to turn properly.Â
âWhat?â
He scoffs and glares at you, âHow should I know?â He pulls over to the side of the road, opens his door, and lets in a rush of cool air and snow. You toss the cashbox to the back of the trailer and follow after him.Â
He goes to where heâs pulling his motorcycle and you feel like you notice an extra bump under the tarp. âWhatâs that?â You take a step towards it just as Logan pulls it back. You have to bite back a laugh when you see the girl from last night curled up next to his motorcycle.Â
She gives you both guilty looks and slowly sits up. âIâm sorry,â Logan offers her a hand and she gets out of the trailer. He grabs her bag and drops it at her feet. âI didnât have anywhere else to go.â
âFind a different ride,â he growls, already heading back to the truck. You open your mouth, prepared to argue, but you canât force her on him. As much as you might want to help her. Sheâs better off away from the two of you.
âYouâre just gonna leave me here?â She snaps at him, a little attitude finally showing through.Â
âYep!â He gets in the truck and you know he wants to drive off immediately but he has to wait for you. You shoot her an apologetic look as you follow after him, slipping into the seat beside him. He starts the engine, driving off slowly, eyes drifting towards the rearview mirror.Â
You bite your tongue, trying not to point out how cruel he is leaving her on a snowy highway in the middle of nowhere. He glances over at you, âWhat?â He snaps.Â
You shake your head and shrug. âNothing.â Youâve barely finished speaking before heâs slamming on his brakes.Â
âGod dammit,â he mutters, running a hand over the stubble on his jaw. You canât help the grin on your face, reaching over to open your door. It doesnât take long for the girl to catch on, scooping up her bag and chasing after you.Â
âYouâre such a softie,â you tease him.Â
âShut the hell up.â
Rogue is nice, if not a little odd. She claims to be a mutant too but doesnât want to give specifics on her abilities. You donât want to push her but you are curious about the gloves she wears. âWhat kind of name is Wolverine?â She asks, spotting Loganâs tags.Â
He glances over at her and smiles slightly, âWhat kind of a name is Rogue?â
She goes to say something but you throw your arm out, holding her back as you shout, âLogan, watch out!â He tries to hit his brakes in time but the treeâs already coming down. The truck slams into it and itâs like time slows down, only for a moment.Â
You can feel the impact of your body against the windshield, the glass dragging along your scalp and skin. Itâs like a million razors each slicing into you. And then, youâre flying through the air, head snapping so hard against the ground you canât see anything.Â
You hear something happening around you, a roar that doesnât sound human echoing through the air. Thereâs the sound of metal crunching and someone is screaming in the distance but you canât see. Itâs not like a total void of darkness, thereâs just nothing.Â
You feel the blood slowly leaking down the back of your skull and something lands harshly against your head. You donât think much time has passed. When your eyes finally open, however, youâre not lying on the pavement.Â
The world around you is foreign. It smells like a hospital but itâs not like any youâve ever seen. X-rays are hanging on the wall and paperwork is scattered on a desk near the bed youâre lying on.Â
Your mind is blank for a moment. Slowly turning back on while you process the sudden change of scenery. You donât even remember closing your eyes, you donât know when your vision came back to you or how long youâve been here.Â
The terror sets in quickly. You throw the blankets off your legs, staring down at the pajamas you wear in disgust. Someone had changed you. Theyâd run tests and done X-rays on you and you donât remember a second of it.Â
You rip the needle out of your arm, tossing it to the floor and running towards the door. Your feet slip on the metal floors as you run but youâre afraid to stop. Everything around you looks more and more like a lab.Â
Did someone from the bar call some government agency? Youâve heard horror stories from your father about the tests the military has run on mutants. Youâre starting to worry thatâs what's happening to you.Â
But you doubt the military would make it so easy for you to escape. This has to be something else. Youâd heard other voices when youâd been lying on the ground. People who had been trying to help. Could that be who took you?
âYou caught on quicker than your friend.â You nearly fall flat on your face, flipping around to see who spoke. But no oneâs there. Youâre completely alone. âIâm just grateful you didnât choke out one of my associates.â itâs coming from beside you now.Â
Itâs all around you, the voice floating through the walls until you think he might be in your mind. âMuch faster than your friend,â he sounds gleeful and it makes you even more anxious. âIâm a telepath, darling, nothing to fear. If youâd just take that elevator and come up to meet me.â
Youâd have to be an idiot to actually listen to the voices in your head. But you donât see another way out of here. So, reluctantly, you follow the floating voiceâs instructions and slip inside the elevator.Â
When the door opens up again you donât have a chance to step inside before someoneâs pushing you back. Logan stands in front of you, hands clamped tightly around your shoulders while he looks you over.Â
You sink into his arms, hugging him tightly to you. Youâd been terrified you were all alone here. Itâs more than a relief to see him again. âYouâre okay?â He asks, pulling back to look at you one last time.Â
You nod, throat too dry to try and form a coherent sentence. You glance over his shoulders brows furrowed at the people awkwardly watching you reunite. Thereâs a man in a wheelchair smiling at you, âAh, glad you could make it.â The floating voice, of course. âLogan here was quite worried about you.â
Logan turns to glare at the man and you offer a slight smile. There is something comforting about him. Youâre not exactly threatened by an old guy in a wheelchair. The redhead behind him, however, is bugging you. Something about the way sheâs looking at Logan doesnât sit right with you.Â
âWelcome to my school for the exceptionally gifted,â something about the way he says that makes you tilt your head in confusion. You donât know what he means until thereâs a puff of smoke behind him and some kid is walking by with their hair on fire like itâs nothing.Â
Mutants. Itâs an entire school for mutants. You think you could pass out again.Â
âItâs the best place we could have ended up, Logan. This is amazing.â Youâve been going back and forth for an hour. He wonât see reason. He keeps saying you need to leave. That you donât know these people and it could all be one big trap.Â
You donât understand him, why heâs so desperate to get away from people like the both of you. Youâre rejected in every other corner of society. You could have something real here.Â
It hits you at once. Thatâs the problem. Heâs not ready for something real. Heâs not used to it because heâs never had it before. At least you could pretend at a sense of normalcy living at home. Itâs an entirely new concept to him, sticking to one place for so long.Â
âWe donât know these people,â he hisses, leaning over the bed to argue with you. You narrow your eyes but your conversation is cut off by a knock on the door. You sigh, walking away from him and swinging the door open.Â
Jean is on the other side, a surprised look on her face when she sees you. âOh, Iâm sorry. I was trying to drop these off to Logan.â You glance down at the towels in your hand and give her a strained smile. Thatâs a flimsy excuse if youâve ever seen one. âI must have the wrong room.â
You step to the side, opening the door wider so she can see him. He doesnât even look at her, too busy angrily unmaking the bed. âNo, you have the right one.â You hold your hands out expectantly, âI can just take those for you.â
The look on her face is priceless and finally causes a real smile to grow on your lips. She wordlessly hands you the towels, looking disappointed. You donât know if it's because of what she was trying to do, or because she couldnât do it.Â
Before she leaves you call out a quick, âTell Scott I said thank you again. Wouldnât be here without him, after all.â Her shoulders tense and she rushes back down the hall. Whatever little crush or interest she has with Logan is going to need to be dealt with on her own.Â
Youâve got enough shit going on without having to worry about her too. You shake your head and slam the door shut, tossing the towels on the desk. Logan sits on the bed, watching you with an odd look.Â
âWhat was that about?â
âSheâs into you,â you tell him bluntly, waiting for his reaction. He doesnât even blink, just glances between the towels and you before shrugging.Â
âNot interested.â You donât want to admit that you feel any relief. There was never any real doubt. But itâs still nice to be reassured.Â
You slip into bed beside him, taking his hand and forcing him to meet your gaze. âI know that this isnât what either of us was expecting, but this is good, Logan. We donât have to worry about pretending weâre something weâre not. We donât have to worry about my dad or anyone finding us.â
He doesnât look entirely convinced. But he lets out a heavy sigh and drags you closer to him. He tucks your head under his chin, placing a brief kiss against your forehead. âIf you want to stay, weâll stay. But Iâm not putting on that fucking costume.â
You laugh a little, peering up at him with a grin, âDeal.âÂ
Thereâs a place for you here, even if there isnât in the rest of the world. You can be safe here, you donât have to worry anymore. You donât have to fear the eyes on the back of your head because they canât get you here.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
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Iâm begging you not to make a love triangle between Logan, Jean and reader đ©in the bodyguard fic
OHMYGOD I nearly posted this and then realized this wasn't a request for a love triangle it was anti-love triangle lmao, you just got saved a long-winded rant.
Don't worry that, along with miscommunication, has to be the top trope to make me want to throw my phone across the room. Plus, from what I recall from the movies, once he loves someone he's done.
He loved Jean so much in the movies and she never stopped haunting that poor man's narrative lol. Once he's chosen someone he's in. If I continued it, it would be a very one-sided attraction on Jean's end bc I just don't think a love triangle fits his character (as in liking more than one woman.)
pt two of broken promises (I know I'm so creative with names)
bodyguard!logan howlett x fem!runaway reader
a/n: SMUT 18+ MDNI they, like, never use protection (don't be silly, sheathe your willy) but Iâd like to make it 100% clear now that she has a magic uterus and there will be absolutely NO baby-making. Just rocking unprotected sex đđ If youâre tagged in this, it does not mean that I am permanently adding you to my taglist. It just means I saw you in my comments/reblogs/inbox asking for a part two and this was the easiest way to let you know I made one. If you would like to be added to the taglist, feel free to ask. Summary: Life on the road isn't exactly glamorous. Cramped spaces and too many cheap motels have you and Logan at each other's throats. You feel eyes tracking you everywhere you go but you're afraid to tell him, afraid it will be the end of the road for the both of you. One cheap bar and an explosion later and your whole life is flipped upside down.
âWhat are you doing?â
You glance over Loganâs shoulder at the register. The man behind it isnât looking at either of you, just disinterestedly scrolling through his phone.Â
âIsnât this what you do?â You ask, motioning to the pack of beef jerky youâre stuffing down your jacket.Â
Logan scoffs and shakes his head. âNo, kid.â He takes the bag from you and rolls his eyes.Â
âWell, then how do you pay for this stuff?â
âNormally, with the money I get from my jobs. But your dad wasnât too forthcoming with my last paycheck.â
You feel that familiar burning churn of guilt roiling around in your gut. Youâve definitely added another complication to his life and it makes you feel like nothing more than a burden sometimes. âOh, Logan, Iâm sorry.â
Logan glances down at you. He gives you that familiar appeasing look, squeezing you closer, and drags you towards the register. He tosses the snacks and drinks onto the counter. The guy just barely glances up at you both.Â
âWill that be all?â He asks in a tone that says he could care less.Â
âYeah,â you answer, eyes drifting towards the magazine rack. Your face is plastered on the cover of a cheap tabloid.Â
LOCAL POLITICIANS DAUGHTER STILL MISSING
Exclusive interview with family on PG. 6
Your eyes go wide and you turn your face further into Loganâs chest. He gives you a confused look before his eyes are snagged by the same thing that caught your attention.Â
âWhy donât you go wait in the truck?â You nod and slip out of his hold, being mindful to keep your face away from the security camera near the front.Â
That keeps happening. You hadnât thought you would have made news, but your father was making this a part of his campaign. Claiming youâd been taken by a mutant bodyguard and that heâs been praying for your safe return. âExpertsâ have been claiming that with no ransom demanded youâre being turned into a message for anyone who goes against mutants.Â
Now, mutants despise you and everyone else thinks youâre a martyr. In a few years, youâre sure youâll be turned into some true crime documentary where people youâve never met before are crying over your disappearance.Â
You slide into the truck and let out a deep sigh. Youâd thought running away would be freeing. But even a hundred miles from him, you can still feel the cold grip of your fatherâs hand around your throat.Â
âTwenty on pump seven,â Logan tosses the cash on the counter, eyes drifting to you in the truck. It was instinct at this point, always keeping an eye on you. Especially since one of your fatherâs more fanatic supporters had spotted you in a shitty diner a week ago. Theyâd called the cops and tried to bar you and Logan from leaving.Â
It hadnât gone over well for him.Â
Heâd been trying to keep you a little more hidden since then, but it left a sour taste in his mouth. Heâd gotten you out of that house to show you what real life was like, to give you a taste of freedom.Â
He felt like he was no better than your father, keeping you cooped up and covered constantly.Â
When the kid in front of him doesnât say anything, Logan clears his throat. He gives him a quizzical look but the boyâs eyes are stuck on the door.Â
âI swear I know her,â he mutters. Loganâs eyes drift towards the TV behind the counter and he sees an old news story of you. Theyâre using the footage of the acid attack, claiming youâve always been the mutant movementâs target.Â
âCan I get twenty on pump seven,â Logan repeats, voice firm. The kid finally looks at him and whatever expression Logan is wearing is enough for him to finally start moving.Â
The second the receipt is in his hand heâs rushing out the door. He doesnât know how long itâs going to take that dumbass to piece two and two together but he canât risk dawdling.Â
He fills the tank up, eyes scanning the gas station the entire time. Heâs had a cloying sense of paranoia ever since the incident in the diner. He knows that at some point this little run of yours is going to come to an end.Â
He doesnât know if itâll end with cops finding the two of you. Or if youâre going to realize the real world isnât all that fun and leave him behind. He knows that a girl like you, one who's used to the finer things, is never going to be satisfied by the life he can offer.Â
But heâs hoping that you come to your senses later rather than sooner. Heâs enjoying traveling with you a lot more than he wants to admit.Â
He gets in the truck, starts it up, and glances over at you. You smile, the smile that makes him feel things he doesnât like admitting to himself or you.Â
âAll good?â You ask.Â
He nods, driving off without a word because he doesnât want to tell you the truth. Doesnât want to admit what you both know to be a fact. The time you have together has an expiration date and heâs worried itâs creeping closer.Â
Loganâs inside some shitty roadside motel. Whatever heâs talking about with the owner is clearly getting heated. You can see the way the angerâs growing on his face. His body is tensed up and he looks like heâs five seconds away from leaping over the counter and taking the greasy man leering at him down.Â
Thereâs a final word exchanged between them and then Logan is storming back towards the truck. He slams the door closed so hard youâre surprised the windows donât shatter. Normally, you sleep in the trailer. Itâs not always the warmest or coziest, but you make it work.Â
Itâs too cold out tonight to do that and Logan doesnât have a spare tank for the heating. Heâd thought heâd had enough for a cheap room for tonight, but clearly, he doesnât. Thereâs a tense silence in the truck as you mentally debate saying anything to him.Â
His fists are wrapped so tightly around the steering wheel you can hear it creaking. You shift, sitting up straighter in your seat and uncurling your legs. Thereâs a stiffness to your joints that has you groaning. Itâs involuntary, ripped out of you simply because youâve been sitting for too long.Â
It catches Loganâs attention and he glances over at you. Thereâs a resigned sort of guilt on his face and it makes you feel sick to your stomach. Heâs used to this type of lifestyle, and sometimes you think heâs embarrassed to share it with you.Â
Youâd never judge him for roadside motels or living off cheap gas station meals. You know you were privileged living up with the wealth you did. But there is something infinitely more satisfying about being poor and happy than there ever was being rich and miserable.
âLook, kid,â he lets out a heavy sigh and you mentally prepare yourself for what youâve been expecting. You were a fun time, a nice ride, but youâre becoming a burden and he canât deal with it anymore.Â
You let your nails dig into the thin skin of your palms so you can attempt to ground yourself. âI need to make some money tonight, so I just need you to bear with me for a while.â
Like there is every time he doesnât boot you to the curb, a relieved rush of air expels from your chest almost violently. âOkay,â you say tentatively, the word dragging out while you try and understand his meaning.Â
âI just,â he stops and it looks like heâs struggling to find the words to say to you. You wait patiently for him to finish, or try to at least. âThereâs a bar nearby. Iâll find some work there,â his words are ominous. They give you nothing and convey so much.Â
Clearly, heâs hiding something from you. You can tell that much from the way heâs avoiding eye contact with you. He pulls out of the motelâs parking lot and turns the radio on. Youâve learned that's his way of telling you he doesnât want to talk without being a dick about it.Â
You want to respect his space because you still feel like an imposter. But itâs hard. Heâs being oddly cagey about this.Â
The drive is short but it feels like youâve been transported to an entirely different town than the one you were in before. He takes only backroads and middle-class homes turn into shady shops with barbed fences. Caged dogs bark at the truck as it drives by and you get a sinking feeling in your gut.Â
Perhaps itâs a little classist of you to automatically assume a few low-end homes equate to a bad neighborhood. But instinctually you know something is off about this place.Â
He parks in front of a run-down bar. Even from here, you can hear loud shouts and jeering coming from inside. You donât know whatâs being said but theyâre certainly passionate. Logan turns towards you, the expression on his face so serious you feel like youâre about to be scolded.Â
âI need you to stay here. I wonât be gone long, just an hour at most. But you need to stay in the truck.â
Your jaw gapes and you scoff at him. âLogan, an hour thatâs rid-â
He cuts you off with a stern call of your name. Your mouth snaps shut and you narrow your eyes at him, teeth gritting together to keep your tongue at bay. âStay here, I mean it. Got it?â
You nod and he repeats your name, sounding aggrieved. âFine,â you huff. âI got it.â He lingers for a moment. You donât know if he doesnât trust you or is just reluctant to leave you alone. Youâre reluctant to be left alone, especially in a shady dark parking lot like this. But clearly whatever is going on inside is worse than whatever could happen to you out here.Â
âIâll be back soon,â he makes this whole thing sound so grave. It makes your brows furrow and doubt churn in your gut. What could he be doing in there thatâs so awful?
He gets out and you watch his form under the flickering street lamps until you canât see him anymore. You sit quietly in the truck for at least three minutes before you already feel the boredom set in.Â
Youâd thought youâd be able to last longer. You used to go for hours dissociating at your fatherâs galas. This is different, though. Youâre a little afraid to let your guard down here.Â
You try to listen to music but you feel bad wasting his gas so you just turn the truck off and huddle under a blanket in the trailer. You try and let yourself fall asleep but you donât last long.Â
Itâs too cold outside to really get a good rest and you can hear people moving around outside the trailer. After about an hour of rolling around and frozen limbs, you figure enough is enough.Â
As much as you donât want to provoke Logan or give him any reason to get rid of you, you canât stay in here all night. Besides, Logan said he wouldnât be long, you can always just lie and say you were worried about him.Â
Satisfied with your excuse you leave the comfort of your blanket behind and slip into Loganâs jacket. You tuck the truck keys in your pocket and walk out into the snowy night. Itâs less cold outside than it was in the trailer, you can see why he wanted a motel room for the night.Â
A few people linger by the cars, smoking and muttering to themselves. You slip past them, ignoring the feeling of their eyes burning into your skin. Youâre sure it's because you look like you donât belong here.Â
The noise in the bar gets louder the closer you get and it reminds you of the night Logan had snuck you out of the house. But youâd had him to lean on, right now, until you find him, youâre on your own. For all the noise coming from the building, the bar is surprisingly empty.Â
Only a few old men are sitting around, drinking beers in silence. The bartender cleans glasses behind the counter, sparing you an odd look before getting back to work. Thereâs not very far for you to look before you figure out that Logan isnât anywhere nearby.Â
âExcuse me?â The bartender spares you a fleeting glance before barely grunting in greeting.Â
The floor underneath you tremors and you glance down at it in surprise. You can hear something going on underneath. You figure that has to be where all the noises are coming from. âIâm looking for someone. Tall, mean as hell, heâs got this hair,â you swoop your hands up by the sides of your head, trying to mimic the odd fluff of Loganâs hair.Â
âDownstairs.â You nod and move around the bar, trying to get to the door behind him. He reaches out, grabbing your bicep and stopping you before you can get far. âIt's a forty-dollar entrance fee, sweetheart.â
Your brow furrows in confusion and you frown as you dig around in your jacket pockets. Youâve come too far to be deterred now. Ignoring the moral implications, you slip Loganâs wallet out of his jacket and give the man forty dollars.Â
He nods towards the door and you give him a weak thank you as you slip past him. Opening the door is like breaking a seal. The noises bombard you almost immediately, so much clearer than they were before.Â
You still canât understand what theyâre screaming but thereâs a violent atmosphere slipping around you as you head down the stairs. The heady smell of cigars and cigarettes threatens to suffocate you. Your eyes water at the smoke in the air.Â
Youâd think youâd have gotten used to secondhand smoking after being around Logan, but heâs less inclined to hotbox the car if youâre beside him. The second your feet hit the floor youâre being jostled to the side violently by the people around you.Â
Itâs nearly impossible to elbow your way through the crowd, but youâre determined to figure out whatâs in the middle of the cage thatâs got them all excited. You can hear the people around you screaming out bets and numbers you donât understand.Â
For one nauseating moment, you think this might be a dog fighting ring, that Logan gambles on it to earn his money. It makes you want to turn around, to shield yourself from the truth. But this is something he tried to keep hidden from you and you need to know the truth about whoever youâre traveling with.Â
You can hear the announcer, but you canât get close enough to see anything yet. âAre you gonna let this man walk away with your money?â Thereâs a resounding NO! from the crowd that makes you jump.Â
A booming voice shouts over the throng of voices, âIâll take him!âÂ
âOur savior ladies and gentlemen!â You shove through two men, ignoring the way they complain about how their beer sloshes on their sleeves.Â
âHey-â You glance over your shoulder as one of them reaches for you. You flick your wrist, sending him and his friend tumbling back into the crowd. You roll your eyes and turn back towards the cage.Â
Your eyes widen and so do Loganâs as you finally see what exactly is going on. Heâs cage fighting, this is what heâd been so secretive about. Honestly, itâs a relief compared to the brutality you were bracing yourself for.Â
You can see his lips starting to form the shape of your name but the man from before is barrelling into his side as the bell goes off. You wince, jumping away from the cage as you hear the meaty impact of his fist against Loganâs face.Â
The people near you scream, shouting for Loganâs blood. Itâs easy to figure out that heâs been beating everyone heâs gone up against based on some bloody faces in the crowd. Itâs smart, easy money. He can always heal, and can never really be beaten, not when heâs literally got fists of steel.Â
Youâre surprised that no oneâs ever caught onto this scam of his. You also wonder why he had been so adamant about you not seeing this. Sure, itâs brutal watching blood spray against the mat. But you donât care. Besides, heâs ridiculously attractive in just his jeans as he pummels into some guy.Â
Maybe thatâs not a normal line of thinking.Â
You shake your head, shelving that for later as the fight dies down. The man is limp on the mat of the cage and Logan is leaning against the wall, smoking a cigar and pointedly not looking at you.Â
You feel that familiar twisting feeling in your stomach and wonder if this was a horrible idea. You should have just stayed in the car like he asked. Youâre sure it would have only been another hour of tirelessly rolling around before he came back. But you couldnât help yourself.Â
He tells you so little about himself. If you get a chance to learn more, youâre going to pounce on the opportunity. Maybe it was a violation of his trust. You sincerely doubt that he would ever willingly have revealed this sort of lifestyle to you, though.Â
He seems to be under the same misguided intention that you need to be sheltered. It reminds you a little of your father. That might be a cruel comparison but itâs the same suffocating feeling of being kept in the dark to suit their needs.Â
The guilt youâd been holding unfurls and blossoms into anger. You find yourself retreating away from the cage and rushing back up the stairs of the bar. You donât want to watch him fight any longer. You donât want to look at him.Â
You just want him to treat you like an equal. Not like some little girl whoâs going to run at the first sign of things getting hard.Â
You burst through the door of the bar, ignoring the cold laughter of the bartender behind you. He clearly seemed to think you couldnât handle a little blood. He wasnât the only one.Â
Youâre only a couple of feet from the truck when you hear footsteps loudly stomping through the snow behind you. âWhat the hell were you doing?â You scoff, unbelieving that he would have the gall to shout at you.Â
You whirl around on him and it catches him off guard. His right foot slides against the slush as he tries to stop himself from ramming into you. âIâm not a little girl, Logan! You donât need to hide stuff like that from me.â
He crosses his arms and glares down at you. âI wasnât hiding anything,â he insists. But the tone of his voice gives him away. He doesnât like that he was caught. âI donât need to tell you jackshit about what I do for money.â
You canât believe how he sounds right now. Why is he getting so defensive about this? âI donât care what you do for money, alright. I just donât get why you felt like I couldnât know about this.â You hate the way the hurt is audible in your voice. You wear your heart on your sleeve, even when you try and cover it.Â
In the same way, heâs masking his feelings with anger, so are you. Just with less success. Something draws across his face, some emotion you canât discern. His voice goes cold and quiet as he shoves an envelope full of cash into your hands.Â
âGo back to the motel. Get a room.â
He storms past you and walks towards the trailer. You follow after him, slightly dumbfounded by how heâs behaving. He rips his motorcycle out from the back and rolls it into a parking spot. You watch him do all this with your tongue glued to the roof of your mouth.Â
Itâs only when he starts to head back towards the bar that you realize heâs not coming with you. âLogan!â You call out, trailing after him slightly. He barely turns back to face you. âAre you,â the words die on your tongue and you canât find it in yourself to finish.Â
Are you angry?
Are you leaving?
Are you going to ditch me at the next bus stop?
Instead of asking any of your ridiculously pining questions, you turn on your heel and storm towards the truck. You rip the door open with more force than necessary and drive off without looking back at him. But you know he watches, know he keeps an eye on you until he canât see you anymore.Â
Your rides with him are normally silent, but this one feels painfully so.Â
You nearly get a room with two beds. But you feel like if you do it will be a horrendous mistake. Reluctantly, you give the man behind the counter enough for a room with one bed large enough for the both of you.Â
Youâre not exactly excited about sharing a bed with him, not after how he behaved tonight. You grumble to yourself as you drag your bag inside and toss it on the ground. You picture putting up a wall of pillows between the two of you, just to be petty.Â
Itâs as youâre showering that you realize you might not even have to. He might not come to join you tonight. He wonât know what room youâre in. And heâd made it pretty clear how pissed he was at you for sneaking into the bar.Â
Maybe youâve finally pushed him too far. Youâve been toying with the boundaries of his patience for a while. Little tests to determine whether he truly wants you around simply to have a warm body ready beside him. Or if he wants you because he genuinely cares for you.Â
You suppose tonight, whether you want it or not, youâll finally have the truth.Â
The thought keeps you awake. You toss and you turn for hours, fighting with yourself. You should be happy, finally figuring out whatâs been haunting you. But youâre not. Youâre petrified. Youâd rather keep living a lie than finally accept that he truly doesnât want you.Â
You throw the covers off, the scratchy material only further adding to your irritation. You stomp into the bathroom, slamming the door closed behind you. You turn on the sink splashing some cool water over your face to try and rid yourself of the warmth lingering under your skin. You donât know if this feeling of being uncomfortable in your own body is from pent-up anger or anxiety.Â
You donât care. You just want to sleep this night away and pretend it never happened. But, of course, the universe has other plans. The motel door creaks open as youâre hovering over the sink, debating whether or not youâre nauseous enough to throw up.Â
You tilt your head slightly towards the sound. Growing up in your house, filtering through rooms like an unheard ghost, allowed you to get good at recognizing footsteps. Logan has finally decided to grace you with his presence.Â
You listen to him as he creeps silently across the room, landing on the squeaky bed. You press your ear against the door and can hear the way the sheets rustle and he cusses under his breath. Thereâs worry staining his voice and you figure you shouldnât drag this on much longer.Â
You open the bathroom door and flip the switch, turning the lamps on like a disappointed mother waiting up for her teenager. You cross your arms mutely and lean against the doorframe as he winces under the sudden light.Â
He jumps, just slightly, and glares over at you. âThought you werenât here,â he accuses. He tries sounding angry, but you have a sudden rush of clarity in that moment. Where you would normally focus only on him being upset with you, you can see the truth of his concern.
Same as you, he doesnât know where he stands in this whole situation. You doubt he had a clear plan when he rescued you from your tower like some ridiculous storybook knight. He most likely thought that you left, the same way you thought he would.Â
You remain silent, though, still a little too flustered to speak coherently. Instead, you examine him. There are cuts and blood all over his shirt. Splatters of it on his face. Though, you know if you looked there would be no physical evidence of him ever being hurt.Â
His brows furrow the longer you stare, a wall building between the two of you. âKid?â He questions, equal parts worried and defensive. Does he really think you actually give a fuck about him fighting?
You shake your head and walk back into the bathroom. You rustle around in the cabinet underneath the sink until you find a washcloth. Wetting it, you bring it back out to him. You station yourself between his spread legs, holding the cloth between you like a peace offering.Â
He looks doubtful as he glances between you and it. Finally, he lets out a rough sigh and simply nods his head. But when he reaches for it you snatch it back, much to his chagrin. You offer him a small smile and tilt his chin up towards you, gently wiping some of the dried blood off his cheeks.Â
He doesnât flinch or hiss away from the less-than-gentle fabric. He stares at you unblinkingly, like if he closes his eyes for a moment heâll wake up and this will all have been a dream. âYou donât have to do this, kid.â
You roll your eyes and crane your neck to get a better look at him. âWould you shut up?â You whisper teasingly.Â
His lips quirk slightly and you can see his shoulder slump in relief at the sound of your voice. âSo, she can talk.â You canât help the little laugh that comes out of you. He grins fully at that and his hands come up to rest on your hips.Â
His thumbs rub soothing circles along the sides of your waist as his hands dip a little lower. âWhat are you doing?â Your hand drifts down to his neck to wipe some blood off there as well.Â
He shakes his head and shrugs, âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
You lift your gaze to his and your lips fall flat, âLogan-â
He cuts you off before you can finish. In one smooth motion, his hands drop to wrap around your thighs. He lifts you slightly and drops you onto his lap. He grins at the slight huff of surprise that rushes out of you.Â
His arms go back to your waist, pulling you closer to him and grinding you a little against him. You bite your lip to stop any noises from escaping. As much as you wouldnât mind what heâs thinking, you need to talk.Â
âLogan,â you scold.Â
He smirks and tilts his head patronizingly, âSomething wrong, sweetheart?â
âItâs not happening,â you tell him firmly, hand still working on cleaning him.Â
He sighs and one of his arms drops away from you. He cups your hand in his, stilling your movements and forcing you to meet his gaze. Gently, he takes the cloth from you and tosses it somewhere you canât see. âIâm fine,â he whispers, eyes searching yours.Â
Itâs hard meeting his gaze. The worry and anxiety from the night still weigh heavily on your shoulders. He repeats himself, fingers tilting your chin up to face him. âAlright?â
âI donât care,â the words come rushing out of you before you can stop them. His brows raise in shock and he gives a slight chuckle of amusement. A lump grows in your throat and your eyes grow wide. âWait, I donât mean-â
You cut yourself off and rub your hands over your face, trying to get your head on right. Loganâs patient, rubbing your back and clearly trying not to laugh at you. You finally take in a deep breath and face him again.Â
âI donât care about the fighting,â you can see his shoulders tense slightly like he doesnât believe you. âI donât care, Logan. You do what you have to survive and Iâm not gonna judge you for that.â
âWhat if I enjoy it?â He cuts you off, tone harsh as he glares down at you. There's experience in how quickly he doubts you, how quickly he tries to get you to change your mind about him.
You wonder how many times heâs been rejected just for being a mutant. Youâve only ever been rejected by one person because only he ever knew. Your father. And that hurt enough for one lifetime.Â
You canât imagine going for as long as he has and constantly being called a monster for something he canât control. Your brows furrow and you lean into him until your lips are brushing. He remains stiff beneath you but you donât let it deter you.Â
âI donât care,â you tell him, pressing your lips to his before slowly pulling back. You wait for him to respond, physically or verbally, but heâs still looking at you with that cold unfamiliar gaze.Â
You wonder if maybe it was a mistake, to bring it up at all. But just as the thought comes heâs surging forward. His lips catch yours, his hands digging so desperately into your shirt you know it rips.Â
Your arms go to his neck, holding onto him so you donât slip off his lap. You haven't been this close for a few days. You think it might have made you both feel on edge. Thereâs a relief that comes from not just having sex with him, but also just being intimate and close to one another.Â
Itâs a reminder that youâre not alone, that thereâs someone here beside you to be a partner and a pillar of stability. Youâve never had that before. Someone that you can rely on and trust fully. You donât think he has either.Â
He craves you the same way you do him. Each kiss, every shared breath, is treated like it will be your last. You donât know when your father will finally catch up to the two of you. You donât know when the police might finally recognize Logan.Â
Thereâs no definitive future for either of you. Itâs a real possibility that this could be your last night together. And neither of you wants to be upset with each other. Because you were never truly mad. You were always just worried.Â
Your hands drop to his shirt, dipping to find the holes in it from his fight and ripping at the flimsy fabric until you can just yank it off. He smiles against your lips at the eager way you move atop him. But he canât tease you, heâs already annoyed with the buttons on your shirt.Â
He pulls back, glaring down at the fabric like it's insulting him. Without another word, he slices through it, leaving it in tatters on your shoulder. You grin, shrugging the rest of it off. âThat was yours.â
He grips your hips tightly and leaves marks where his fingers are as a reminder that he was here. He flips you over, leaves you breathless as he hovers over you. âI really donât give a fuck, sweetheart.â
Youâre addicted to his voice. How breathy and desperate it is when heâs with you. Itâs a level of vulnerability you rarely get to see from him. He canât hide himself when heâs with you like this. He wants you just as badly as you do him.Â
It gives you a confidence rush like no other, makes your ego grow ten times its size. If you can make a man like this fall to his knees from nothing more than a kiss, then youâre capable of a lot more than you give yourself credit for.Â
But you donât want that tonight. You reach for him before he can go much further, grabbing him by his hair and tugging until you know it stings. He nearly fucking moans at your rough touch, eyes fluttering open to meet yours. The green of them has been wholly consumed by his desire for you and it makes you ache for him.Â
âNot tonight,â you tell him. Thereâs no room for argument in your tone. As much as he might want to taste you, devour you, all you want is to be as close to him as possible. You want to be covered and filled by him in every way you can be.Â
His head falls against your thigh, a rough groan tumbling from his throat at your words. You drag him towards you, pulling him up your body until youâre face to face. You smile softly up at him, lifting your head so you can meet his lips again.Â
Youâll never get enough of kissing him, of tasting him. Sometimes you have to stop yourself from reaching across the seats and kissing him while he drives. Youâve nearly made him wreck a few times and forced him to pull over so you could both have some fun in the back.Â
Addiction isnât the right word for what you feel for him. It brings along its own negative connotations. The taint of dependency and toxicity. With addiction, itâs a parasitic relationship, hurts you but makes you feel good.Â
This is just goodness. This is a kind touch for the first time in your life and finally feeling safe in someone elses arms. This is opening yourself up to him fully and not once feeling like you need to mold yourself into something else to make him happy. Itâs accepting him as he is, a broken dog who likes to fight to punish himself. You donât want to change him or make him âbetter.â You just want him to be happy.Â
You use your powers to help yourself, flipping him over and straddling his hips. You drag his jeans down his legs and flick your wrist, sending them flying somewhere across the room. He watches you with eyes filled with awe, hands drifting over your curves like something to be worshipped.Â
You know heâs waiting for it, for you to sink yourself down on him and finally be filled. But you wait, hover over him even as the muscles of your thighs tremor. âYou donât hide things from me anymore,â you warn him. Youâre not asking, for once, youâre demanding what you want.Â
He doesnât look angry like youâd been expecting. Instead, it only seems to turn him on more. âYa know,â his hands drift to your hips, dragging you down and over his cock until itâs wet with your want. Your nails dig into his chest until thereâs blood beading under them and youâre trying not to let your noises slip out.Â
âI kinda like it when youâre all bossy like this.âÂ
âLogan,â you grit his name out. It takes everything in you not to look as affected by him as you feel. âNo more hiding shit.â
He leans up on his elbows. His hand drifts to the nape of your neck and drags you down until your lips are nearly touching his. âYeah, I got it, sweetheart.â
Like a taut rope being cut, you sink into him, your hips finally drop and he guides you down every inch of him until you feel like youâre so full you canât breathe. He lets you linger for a moment, and get used to this feeling while he steals the very air from your lungs.Â
Heâs greedy with the way he touches you. His hands always moving like heâll never fully be satisfied with how much of you he can feel. Heâs always reaching for you like he needs to make sure youâre actually real and not just something heâs dreamt up.Â
Even with how impatient he is, youâre always the one that moves first. You roll your hips over him, moaning at how he feels inside you. Itâs like heâs perfectly molded you around him. He always manages to brush against the spots that make your eyes roll into the back of your head.Â
The second your hips begin to roll, heâs wrapping his heavy arms around you, grinding you down into him. He keeps you trapped in place, using you like a toy as he bounces you on his lap. Your mind is fuzzy, every bad thought and feeling shoved out while he makes you go dumb on his dick.
You love how boneless you go. You donât have to think now, donât have to worry. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, shifting yourself further on top of him until you're practically burying yourself under his skin.Â
Not thinking always comes with its own consequences, though. Your powers slip a little out of your grasp. The walls trembling and the drawers and cabinets opening and closing. The both of you have gotten used to the noise, know how to drown it out, and just focus on each other.Â
One of these days, youâll need to figure out a way to have sex with him without bringing the room down around you. Thatâs a problem for later though. His whispered praises and grunts of your name filter through your mind until thereâs nothing left inside you but him.Â
âFuck,â he hisses in your ear, âyouâre so fucking tight around me. You close?â He grunts, hand drifting down to rub tight circles on your clit. You dig your nails into his shoulders, nodding your head frantically against his neck. âWords, sweetheart.â
âShit,â you can barely think of your own damn name. Let alone what you want from him. âFuck off,â you hiss. He chuckles at the attitude and you almost expect him to stop, just to be a dick because you were a brat.Â
But heâs just as close as you are and heâs too selfish to tease. Wave after wave of pleasure crashes down on you as your body shakes against his. He follows quickly after you, warmth shooting up inside you and almost leaking down your thighs. You feel stuffed, like your bodyâs been pushed to the limit and further.Â
You both sit together in silence for a while. You ignore the way your skin sticks to his uncomfortably, instead reveling in the warmth he provides you. Anyone else, and youâd be rushing to get away from them.Â
Youâre always extra sensitive after sex, every little thing setting you off. But thereâs a comfort to the way his hairy ass chest brushes against your breasts and his arms squeeze around you. Itâs a nice grounding feeling.Â
The tips of your fingers drift over his arms, following the path of his veins and brushing against his fingers lazily. He flips his palm over, encasing your hand in his own wordlessly. Little things like that ease your worries. Makes you feel like something more than just a quick fuck.Â
He breaks the silence first, which is rare for him. âIâm sorry about tonight.â
You frown and peer up at him. âI told you, I donât care about the fighting.â
He sighs and shakes his head, âNot that. I shouldnât have gotten so fucking mad at you. You didnât do anything wrong.â You want to interrupt him, assure him that you both acted pretty childishly.Â
But you understand itâs difficult for him to express himself verbally. He usually prefers silent acts of apologies and expression, you donât want to mess him up before he can get out what he wants to say.Â
âI donât want to be like your father.â Your face screws up a little and you shift uncomfortably on his lap. He loosens his grip, giving you room to leave if you want to, but you stay put. âIâm trying not to coddle you, sweetheart, or hide you away from the world. But I donât like you seeing that shit.â
âYouâre not my dad, Logan. He wouldnât give me a choice,â you try and joke but it just seems to make him more irritated. Sighing you straighten up, bracing yourself on his chest and staring down at him.Â
Your head tilts to the side in contemplation and he almost looks uncomfortable under the attention. âIâm not so fragile or sheltered that Iâm going to shatter at the first taste of the real world, Logan. I mean, for godâs sake, Iâve had acid thrown at me and bodyguards since I could walk. I know how dangerous it is. Whatever you want to hide from me, Iâve seen worse.â
You let your words sink in for a moment and he looks at you like heâs seeing you for the first time. You know that itâs odd for him, to comprehend a girl who was afraid to go into a bar swallowing down an illegal fighting ring like itâs nothing. But youâre not lying. Everyday little things are what youâre unused to. But youâve lived alongside violence your whole life.Â
âLook, fighting, sleeping in shitty motels, and your truck, that doesn't bother me. But I donât like when you hide things and I donât,â you take in a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself for the worst. This is what youâve been trying to tell him for weeks.Â
A few little words have your tongue tied and make you desperate to cover yourself up again. He can see the shift in your expression, and feel how tense you get. He sits up a little more, thumb rubbing soothing circles over the back of your hand.Â
âI donât want to just be someone to fuck you, Logan. I didnât come with you so youâd have easy access pussy,â he looks thoroughly amused at your crude words, but thereâs something else lingering in his expression. Something like hurt.Â
âIs that what you think?â He asks, tone distant. You canât find the words so you simply nod. He sighs and shakes his head. He eases you off his lap and you worry youâve truly fucked this up somehow.Â
He goes into the bathroom, returns with a wet washcloth. He still doesnât speak and youâre on edge the entire time he cleans the both of you up. You can see heâs thinking, biting his tongue, and trying to figure out what it is that he wants to say to you.Â
Youâre impatient, five seconds away from just demanding a response from him. He tosses the cloth and drops into bed beside you. You draw the sheets up to your chest, glaring down at him while he rubs his hands over his face with a tired sigh.Â
When he opens his eyes again he laughs at how close you are. âJesus,â he wraps an arm around your waist, dragging you down into his chest even though you fight him. It must be easier for him to speak when youâre not staring at him.Â
âI didnât go back for you so I could fuck you, kid. I⊠care about you,â thereâs a long pause before he says the word care. You think itâs funny, that he canât bring himself to admit what he actually feels. But youâll take it, youâll give him the time he needs to come to terms with the truth.Â
For now, you let yourself fall asleep, feeling just a little bit better about the road ahead.Â
Things get easier between the two of you. And somehow harder at the same time. You donât walk on eggshells around each other, no longer afraid of scaring the other off now. Which also means that you find it easier to bicker with him about little things. Like, not just tossing his trash everywhere in the truck. Youâre practically living out of the trailer, the least he could do is help you keep it tidy.Â
You know itâs weird for him. Suddenly having someone nag at him not to be a slob or to take breaks in between driving so he doesnât wear himself out. Itâs an adjustment you see him struggle with sometimes.Â
You try not to be too pushy, but thereâs only so many times you can flick crumbs from his burgers off your seat before you lose it. âLogan!â You snap, glaring at him as you stand up only to find chip crumbs squished into the fabric of your leggings.Â
He glances over at you and shrugs, âWhat?âÂ
You glance between the crumbs and him with a glare but he doesnât seem to be connecting the dots. âFucks sake,â you grumble, passive-aggressively wiping the truck seat off before you slam the door and storm towards the diner.Â
Youâre sick of being cramped in the truck. Youâre sick of the greasy food. Youâve begun to crave salads lately. Which is beyond weird. But the novelty of shitty food and milkshakes wore off a hundred miles ago.Â
Logan catches up to you, huffing with irritation as he swings the door open for you. You take a seat in the booth near the corner, snatching up the menu and pointedly staring at it and not him. âReally?â He demands. When you donât answer he tips the menu down, forcing you to meet his gaze. âWhat is your problem?â He hisses, trying not to draw attention to you both.Â
You lean in, voice a harsh whisper. âHow hard is it to just not make a mess? We live out of that damn truck, the least you could do is keep your crumbs on your side.â
He rolls his eyes and leans back in the booth. Youâre both sick of having the same fight. But thereâs really nothing else to do anymore. When youâre stuck together for so long, itâs the small things that get to you.Â
Youâre going to say more but the waitress pops in front of you out of nowhere. âHi!â She beams and gives you her name, the bows in her hair trembling at how hyper she is. âWhat can I get you both today?â
You and Logan place your orders, and he shoots you an odd look when you only order the salad. âWeâve got a couple more hours ahead of us, youâre gonna get hungry.â
You cross your arms and shrug, âNo, I wonât.â
He licks his lips, sucking on his teeth and leaning against the table. âYes, you will,â he argues with a stern voice.Â
You narrow your eyes at him and give him a bitter smile. âKiss. My. Ass.â
Your stomach grumbles for the third time and you know that Logan can hear it. Youâre pointedly not making eye contact with him. It feels like it's louder than the music at this point and you really donât want to prove him right.Â
Without a word, he begins to dig around in the center console. You glance towards him, confused, âWhatâre you doing?â
He doesnât say anything, just tosses whatever heâs grabbed onto your lap. You glance down at it and frown. Itâs somehow cold as you unwrap it. You pull the parchment paper away and let out a relieved sigh.Â
He ordered you a wrap from the diner without you realizing. You take a bite, your hunger steadily easing away. âIâm sorry,â you mutter, pointedly looking out the window.Â
He glances over at you and scoffs. âWhat was that? Couldnât hear ya, kid.âÂ
You roll your eyes and turn to glare at him. Heâs already looking at you, a teasing tilt to his lips. âI said Iâm sorry,â you snap. âI shouldnât have been a bitch.â
He shakes his head and waves you off. âI havenât exactly been pleasant myself. Iâll,â he huffs lowly and forces the words out, âclean up more.â Â
âI think weâve just been stuck on the road too long. Weâre gonna end up driving each other insane.â
His eyes glance along the signs on the highway. Thereâs a notice for food and shopping at the next exit and he nods towards it. âWeâll stop at a motel for a few nights. Take a break.â You want to ask him if heâs sure thatâs smart.Â
It seems risky, to slow down for so long. But you need to walk around, breathe fresh air, and stretch your legs. Youâre too selfish to tell him not to stop and keep going. Instead, you nod and smile at him. âThat sounds really nice.â
He gives you a slight smile thatâs gone as quickly as it came, reaching over and resting his hand on your thigh. You move closer to him and he turns the radio up. You wonder why he doesnât want to talk anymore but you donât push it. Youâre too excited to finally get out of the truck again.Â
The town is nice enough. Itâs small, with only a few shops where you buy some new shirts to replace oneâs that Logan has torn up. The motel youâre staying at doesnât have a washing machine so you have to use the laundromat to wash your clothes.Â
Logan says heâs going to see if he can find a quick job nearby. You wonder if that means a real job or a more bloody one. You decide not to ask questions, instead taking the little change you have and figuring youâll try to get the smell of grease out of all your clothes.Â
As you load the machine up and put your quarters in you canât escape the feeling of someone watching you. Youâve been on high alert ever since Logan stole you away from the house. But this is different.Â
Youâve gotten used to your own paranoia, you know when itâs real or not. You walk away from the machine, glancing out at the glass walls near the front and trying to see if thereâs someone out there. This, oddly enough, doesnât feel like a police stakeout where theyâre going to track you back to the motel and bust Logan.Â
This is something different. There is a deep-seated primal fear in you that makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up. Your heart races as your eyes search the dark street outside. What little glow comes from the streetlights isnât enough for you to clearly make anything out.Â
But you feel them, tracking your every move. Theyâre somewhere nearby, you canât see them but they see you. You feel sick to your stomach. You glance at the door before racing towards it. You turn the lock, slowly backing away and keeping your eyes trained on the street.Â
You look into the shadows and find shapes and movements where there are none. Your eyes spin as your brain crafts a horrible image of some monster waiting outside for you. When the timer for the washer goes off you let out a sharp scream, spinning around and clutching your chest as you glare at it.Â
âFuckâs sake,â you mutter, angrily running your hand over your face and trying to catch your breath. You put the clothes in the dryer and by the time you're done, the feeling is gone. You donât know if they were never there to begin with, or if they got bored and left.Â
Youâd told Logan that you didnât need a ride, youâd just walk the short distance back to the motel. Now, you use the phone on the front counter and call him, telling him youâve changed your mind after all.Â
By the time he picks you up, he looks incredibly concerned. You know you sounded panicked when you called him. You still feel upset about the whole thing. But when he asks whatâs wrong you just tell him you got a little scared walking back in the dark.Â
You donât tell him someone was watching you because you know heâll make you pack up and leave again. You want some stability. Even if it's just for a week. So, as stupid as it is, you lie to him and say everythingâs fine.Â
When you try to go to sleep that night you feel like youâre being watched again. Even with the curtains closed their eyes burn into you. You toss and turn under the heavy weight of the sheets, struggling to get comfortable.Â
Thereâs a low grumble behind you before Logan throws his arm over your waist and tugs you back into his chest. âStop movinâ around,â he demands, his voice barely audible. You smile a little at how tired he sounds before forcing yourself to settle down.Â
He doesnât give you much choice, using his body as a weight to keep you pinned. You still feel their gaze, even more now, but his proximity brings you enough comfort to get a little bit of restless sleep.Â
Loganâs up before you, he always is. He comes in with cheap coffee and free breakfast from the lounge. You push the sheets off your legs, your shirt sticking to your back from the cold sweat of your nervous sleeping. You feel a little more at ease this morning.Â
You wonder if youâre developing some late-in-life fear of the dark. You donât know why you were so upset last night, you feel perfectly fine now. Itâs almost like it was all one bad dream. Logan walks over, handing you the coffee wordlessly and rustling around in your bag for something.Â
He pulls out the envelope of cash you keep stashed away and frowns at the contents. âFound a job,â he mutters, stuffing the envelope away and turning back towards you. He leans against the desk, face pensive.Â
You rub your eyes, trying to wake yourself up a bit more so you sound coherent. âWhat is it?â You take a sip of the coffee and your face screws up at the aftertaste.Â
âFighting,â his tone is clipped and you wonder whatâs got him up in arms. He walks past you, heading into the bathroom, and closing the door behind him. You tilt your head, gaze following him curiously. He doesnât normally close the door, he usually likes to invite you to join him.Â
Something happened and you wonder if heâs hiding the same thing you are. You close your eyes, taking in a deep breath and closing your mind off to the fear from last night.Â
By the time Logan is done in the bathroom, youâre feeling more awake. You canât just dismiss what happened last night. Youâve never gotten scared like that before. You refuse to ignore your instincts, but youâre also not going to let whoever that was terrify you into going back on the road.Â
You donât want things between you and Logan to grow more tense than they already are. The time away from each other yesterday helped a lot. You no longer want to strangle him when you hear him breathe. Youâll just stick closer to him today and see if you feel the eyes on you again tonight.Â
âSo,â you start, testing the waters to see if heâs still in a bad mood. He glances over at you, eyebrows quirked in curiosity but youâre tongue-tied as you stare at him. However many weeks youâve been with him and youâre never gonna get used to seeing him straight out of the shower.Â
The towel is draped low on his hips, giving you a taunting look at what lies underneath the white cloth. Droplets drip down his abs and youâve never wanted to be water more than you do right now. Itâs unfair, just how attractive he is.Â
You always forget what youâre going to say. You canât think when he has a shirt off, itâs infuriating. Scoffing, you turn away from him and shake your head. You hear him chuckle, you know he knows what youâre thinking about.Â
âWhatâs wrong?â He creeps up behind you, arms wrapping around your waist and tugging you back into his chest.Â
âLogan, dammit,â water soaks into the back of your shirt uncomfortably and you tilt your head to glare at him.Â
He smirks down at you, âCat got your tongue, kid?â
You roll your eyes and push away from him. âI canât even remember what I was going to say.â You snatch a shirt from the dresser and shove it into his hands. âPut this on.â
He scoffs and gives you a disbelieving look. âAre you serious?â You wait for him, gaze expectant. Youâre not gonna be able to think when he looks like this. Sighing, he acquieses and tugs the shirt on. His lips fall into a sarcastic line, âHappy?â
Like a switch being flipped you finally remember what you were going to ask him. âThe job you told me about. Where is it?â
You can see on his face how little he wants to divulge that information to you. But you know heâs going to tell you. You two made a deal not to hide things, although, you might be breaking your side of that right now.Â
âSome shitty bar a few miles from here. Listen-â
Youâre not gonna like it.Â
I donât want you tagging along.Â
You should just stay here and read or some shit.
You wonder which one heâll pick today. âYou wouldnât like it, itâs just a shitty little place where I can make some quick cash.â Look at that, itâs rarely ever your first pick excuse. You must be getting better at reading him.Â
âIâll come with you,â you tell him because youâre not asking. Youâre not staying by yourself tonight and you both need the money. You grin at him even as his face falls in disappointment. âMaybe Iâll fight.â
He doesnât even say anything and you immediately regret what you said. The look heâs giving you would put you six feet under if it could. âIt was just a joke,â you mutter.
âWasnât funny, kid,â he tells you, tone clipped as he moves around you to grab his jeans. âI donât even want you in those places, let alone fuckinâ fighting.â
You purse your lips and take a seat on the bed, handing him his jacket when he begins looking for it. âI have abilities too, you know. Maybe I could win a fight.â
âDonât,â he snaps. âI win because I can take the hits people deal me. You canât,â you donât bother arguing with him that you heal too. You understand what he means. You might be able to recover physically, but thereâs a mental aspect to being knocked on the ground. Thereâs humiliation and fear in cage fights, you probably wouldnât be able to handle that side of it.Â
He waits for you to say anything else but when he realizes youâve dropped the subject he lets out a relieved sigh. âYouâll stay in the truck,â he tries.Â
You give him a deadpan look, slipping the keys out of your purse and handing them to him. âNo way in hell, but Iâll stay by the bar if it makes you feel better.â He stays silent and nods but you know heâll try and convince you otherwise when you actually get to the place. Tough luck, though, you donât think itâs safe for either of you to be apart tonight. Even if itâs just staying in the truck.Â
The setup of these places is always the same. Though, this bar seems to be particularly disgusting in comparison to other ones youâve been to. You position yourself near the corner, your back to the wall so youâre less likely to be noticed in the crowd.Â
The fights never last more than a few minutes. And thatâs if Logan is feeling generous. Most of the time you only need to be here an hour before people get pissed off and go home. Someone bumps into you and you hear a small, âIâm sorry,â before they rush to claim a stool.Â
The crowdâs already begun to die out. Most leave while they still have a little money left in their pockets. You duck your head down, catching the eye of the girl whoâd bumped into you. She looks young and incredibly skittish. Her eyes keep darting to the tip jar near the bartender.Â
She quietly asks for water but the bartender just shakes his head, tugging the jar closer to him. You donât know why youâre drawn to her, maybe itâs because she looks like one of those sad pound puppies, but you take a seat beside her.Â
âWater,â you order, slipping him some change. When he gives it to you, you pass it off to her, spotting the greedy way she eyes it. You know a runaway when you see one, she clearly needs a little help. But Loganâs got enough on his shoulders, youâre not gonna bug him with adding another person to the mix.Â
âThank you,â she gulps it down like she hasnât drunk anything in days. You feel your stomach twist with empathy. What little cash you have in your wallet, you slip into her bag as you pass by her. Logan will have made enough for it to be spared and it's the least you can do.Â
Not everyone is as lucky as you to have someone help them navigate a new life.Â
Logan grabs his jacket, wiping blood off from under his nose and heading towards you. You know heâll want a drink before you go, he always does. Before he can say anything someoneâs shouting the name he uses in the cage. âHey, Wolverine! I want my fucking money back.â
The big man heâd knocked down earlier takes a step towards him. His friend tries to hold him back, but thereâs no stopping him. Heâs already had his ass kicked once, what makes him think this is going to be any different?
âNot your money anymore, bub.â Logan scoffs and turns back towards you. You just want to leave now. You donât want to stay for a drink or go get something to eat. You feel the eyes on you again, but when you turn to find them thereâs no one there but the girl.Â
And sheâs not looking at you. Her eyes are wide and staring at something else. âBehind you!â She screeches, and both you and Logan whirl around to find the man barreling towards him with a knife outstretched.Â
Logan moves so quickly that you stumble back slightly. He grabs the guy's arm, twisting his wrist until the knife drops to the ground. He shoves him back against the wall, claws out and pinning him there.
âShit,â you whisper, glancing around as the few patrons of the bar stare in horror at Logan. The people counting his money stop and tuck it back into the cash box. You clench your eyes shut in irritation, heâs not gonna be getting paid tonight, thatâs for sure.Â
Thereâs a strange noise behind you, like someone cocking a gun. You turn around slowly, gasping when you see the bartender pointing the barrel of his shotgun at your chest. Heâs not aiming it at Logan, heâs aiming it at you. Like he somehow knows thatâs the only way to get him to back off.Â
Itâs not like he was going to kill the guy, besides, he came at him with a knife first. Whatâs the difference if Loganâs a mutant? Heâs defending himself. Why does no one understand that?
âGet out of my bar,â the old man warns lowly, taking a step closer to you. Logan turns around and finally spots whatâs going on.Â
âPay me and Iâll be on my way.â You know youâd be able to heal from the shotgun blast, but you donât exactly want to go through it.Â
The old man laughs and shakes his head. âYouâre not getting paid, buddy. Get the fuck out of my bar before I put a hole in your little girlfriend.â
Your eyes narrow in disbelief. You debate with yourself for a moment, if this is smart or not. But the guyâs being a prick and youâre sick of people treating mutants like theyâre less than nothing. You flick your wrist and the shotgun goes flying out of his hand.Â
You glance over at the cashbox and it comes floating towards you, landing easily in your outstretched palm. âBe thankful Iâm not blowing a hole in you,â you warn, glaring at the cowering man. You walk forward and he stumbles back and you try not to focus on the sick feeling of satisfaction it brings you. You grab the tip jar and shove it towards the girl at the end of the bar. âGood luck, kid.â
Logan releases the man from the before, taking a step towards you. You feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand up and rush towards the exit of the bar. You need to just get the fuck out of this town as quickly as possible, youâre not safe here anymore.Â
Logan seems to agree with you. He gets into the truck and doesnât turn back to the motel. Instead, he turns onto the highway while you keep your eyes peeled on the trees outside your window. Thereâs someone out there, still following you.Â
âSomethingâs wrong with the suspension,â you glance up from where youâd been working on breaking open the cashbox and frown. Loganâs glaring down at the steering wheel, it seems like heâs struggling to get it to turn properly.Â
âWhat?â
He scoffs and glares at you, âHow should I know?â He pulls over to the side of the road, opens his door, and lets in a rush of cool air and snow. You toss the cashbox to the back of the trailer and follow after him.Â
He goes to where heâs pulling his motorcycle and you feel like you notice an extra bump under the tarp. âWhatâs that?â You take a step towards it just as Logan pulls it back. You have to bite back a laugh when you see the girl from last night curled up next to his motorcycle.Â
She gives you both guilty looks and slowly sits up. âIâm sorry,â Logan offers her a hand and she gets out of the trailer. He grabs her bag and drops it at her feet. âI didnât have anywhere else to go.â
âFind a different ride,â he growls, already heading back to the truck. You open your mouth, prepared to argue, but you canât force her on him. As much as you might want to help her. Sheâs better off away from the two of you.
âYouâre just gonna leave me here?â She snaps at him, a little attitude finally showing through.Â
âYep!â He gets in the truck and you know he wants to drive off immediately but he has to wait for you. You shoot her an apologetic look as you follow after him, slipping into the seat beside him. He starts the engine, driving off slowly, eyes drifting towards the rearview mirror.Â
You bite your tongue, trying not to point out how cruel he is leaving her on a snowy highway in the middle of nowhere. He glances over at you, âWhat?â He snaps.Â
You shake your head and shrug. âNothing.â Youâve barely finished speaking before heâs slamming on his brakes.Â
âGod dammit,â he mutters, running a hand over the stubble on his jaw. You canât help the grin on your face, reaching over to open your door. It doesnât take long for the girl to catch on, scooping up her bag and chasing after you.Â
âYouâre such a softie,â you tease him.Â
âShut the hell up.â
Rogue is nice, if not a little odd. She claims to be a mutant too but doesnât want to give specifics on her abilities. You donât want to push her but you are curious about the gloves she wears. âWhat kind of name is Wolverine?â She asks, spotting Loganâs tags.Â
He glances over at her and smiles slightly, âWhat kind of a name is Rogue?â
She goes to say something but you throw your arm out, holding her back as you shout, âLogan, watch out!â He tries to hit his brakes in time but the treeâs already coming down. The truck slams into it and itâs like time slows down, only for a moment.Â
You can feel the impact of your body against the windshield, the glass dragging along your scalp and skin. Itâs like a million razors each slicing into you. And then, youâre flying through the air, head snapping so hard against the ground you canât see anything.Â
You hear something happening around you, a roar that doesnât sound human echoing through the air. Thereâs the sound of metal crunching and someone is screaming in the distance but you canât see. Itâs not like a total void of darkness, thereâs just nothing.Â
You feel the blood slowly leaking down the back of your skull and something lands harshly against your head. You donât think much time has passed. When your eyes finally open, however, youâre not lying on the pavement.Â
The world around you is foreign. It smells like a hospital but itâs not like any youâve ever seen. X-rays are hanging on the wall and paperwork is scattered on a desk near the bed youâre lying on.Â
Your mind is blank for a moment. Slowly turning back on while you process the sudden change of scenery. You donât even remember closing your eyes, you donât know when your vision came back to you or how long youâve been here.Â
The terror sets in quickly. You throw the blankets off your legs, staring down at the pajamas you wear in disgust. Someone had changed you. Theyâd run tests and done X-rays on you and you donât remember a second of it.Â
You rip the needle out of your arm, tossing it to the floor and running towards the door. Your feet slip on the metal floors as you run but youâre afraid to stop. Everything around you looks more and more like a lab.Â
Did someone from the bar call some government agency? Youâve heard horror stories from your father about the tests the military has run on mutants. Youâre starting to worry thatâs what's happening to you.Â
But you doubt the military would make it so easy for you to escape. This has to be something else. Youâd heard other voices when youâd been lying on the ground. People who had been trying to help. Could that be who took you?
âYou caught on quicker than your friend.â You nearly fall flat on your face, flipping around to see who spoke. But no oneâs there. Youâre completely alone. âIâm just grateful you didnât choke out one of my associates.â itâs coming from beside you now.Â
Itâs all around you, the voice floating through the walls until you think he might be in your mind. âMuch faster than your friend,â he sounds gleeful and it makes you even more anxious. âIâm a telepath, darling, nothing to fear. If youâd just take that elevator and come up to meet me.â
Youâd have to be an idiot to actually listen to the voices in your head. But you donât see another way out of here. So, reluctantly, you follow the floating voiceâs instructions and slip inside the elevator.Â
When the door opens up again you donât have a chance to step inside before someoneâs pushing you back. Logan stands in front of you, hands clamped tightly around your shoulders while he looks you over.Â
You sink into his arms, hugging him tightly to you. Youâd been terrified you were all alone here. Itâs more than a relief to see him again. âYouâre okay?â He asks, pulling back to look at you one last time.Â
You nod, throat too dry to try and form a coherent sentence. You glance over his shoulders brows furrowed at the people awkwardly watching you reunite. Thereâs a man in a wheelchair smiling at you, âAh, glad you could make it.â The floating voice, of course. âLogan here was quite worried about you.â
Logan turns to glare at the man and you offer a slight smile. There is something comforting about him. Youâre not exactly threatened by an old guy in a wheelchair. The redhead behind him, however, is bugging you. Something about the way sheâs looking at Logan doesnât sit right with you.Â
âWelcome to my school for the exceptionally gifted,â something about the way he says that makes you tilt your head in confusion. You donât know what he means until thereâs a puff of smoke behind him and some kid is walking by with their hair on fire like itâs nothing.Â
Mutants. Itâs an entire school for mutants. You think you could pass out again.Â
âItâs the best place we could have ended up, Logan. This is amazing.â Youâve been going back and forth for an hour. He wonât see reason. He keeps saying you need to leave. That you donât know these people and it could all be one big trap.Â
You donât understand him, why heâs so desperate to get away from people like the both of you. Youâre rejected in every other corner of society. You could have something real here.Â
It hits you at once. Thatâs the problem. Heâs not ready for something real. Heâs not used to it because heâs never had it before. At least you could pretend at a sense of normalcy living at home. Itâs an entirely new concept to him, sticking to one place for so long.Â
âWe donât know these people,â he hisses, leaning over the bed to argue with you. You narrow your eyes but your conversation is cut off by a knock on the door. You sigh, walking away from him and swinging the door open.Â
Jean is on the other side, a surprised look on her face when she sees you. âOh, Iâm sorry. I was trying to drop these off to Logan.â You glance down at the towels in your hand and give her a strained smile. Thatâs a flimsy excuse if youâve ever seen one. âI must have the wrong room.â
You step to the side, opening the door wider so she can see him. He doesnât even look at her, too busy angrily unmaking the bed. âNo, you have the right one.â You hold your hands out expectantly, âI can just take those for you.â
The look on her face is priceless and finally causes a real smile to grow on your lips. She wordlessly hands you the towels, looking disappointed. You donât know if it's because of what she was trying to do, or because she couldnât do it.Â
Before she leaves you call out a quick, âTell Scott I said thank you again. Wouldnât be here without him, after all.â Her shoulders tense and she rushes back down the hall. Whatever little crush or interest she has with Logan is going to need to be dealt with on her own.Â
Youâve got enough shit going on without having to worry about her too. You shake your head and slam the door shut, tossing the towels on the desk. Logan sits on the bed, watching you with an odd look.Â
âWhat was that about?â
âSheâs into you,â you tell him bluntly, waiting for his reaction. He doesnât even blink, just glances between the towels and you before shrugging.Â
âNot interested.â You donât want to admit that you feel any relief. There was never any real doubt. But itâs still nice to be reassured.Â
You slip into bed beside him, taking his hand and forcing him to meet your gaze. âI know that this isnât what either of us was expecting, but this is good, Logan. We donât have to worry about pretending weâre something weâre not. We donât have to worry about my dad or anyone finding us.â
He doesnât look entirely convinced. But he lets out a heavy sigh and drags you closer to him. He tucks your head under his chin, placing a brief kiss against your forehead. âIf you want to stay, weâll stay. But Iâm not putting on that fucking costume.â
You laugh a little, peering up at him with a grin, âDeal.âÂ
Thereâs a place for you here, even if there isnât in the rest of the world. You can be safe here, you donât have to worry anymore. You donât have to fear the eyes on the back of your head because they canât get you here.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp âĄÂ
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorte Â
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl @allilium @insomniachox âĄÂ
Asked for part two: @enchantedbutterflies @strawberrylore @ittoscumdump @enananawoah @wotcherboo
@cali0101 @fluffy-b33z @pcrushinnerd @izbelross @saltwaterburns
@likeficsinthewnd âĄÂ
Iâm binging all of your wolvie fics⊠im obsessed with your love for the plot and character building. I normally cringe when someone creates an in-universe name that all the characters use but there is something so addictive abt the flex persona. I love her. Keep doing what youâre doing please itâs so compelling
I hate the in-universe name stuff too but I think that's just because people blatantly make those characters an OC without admitting to it. I gave Flux a title solely for convenience of writing, but I still try to keep her a blank slate physically and relatable in her personality.
I'm glad that you're enjoying reading my fics for her so much. I really do just try to make her as relatable as possible because it's nearly impossible to have a completely blank slate Y/N. But it is easy to make an inclusive one, which is my goalđ
little teaser for what I've been working on so you guys don't think I'm abandoning you <3
At first, you donât think theyâre going to stop. They slow down slightly but it looks like theyâre going right past you. âShit,â you hiss, shoulder slumping in defeat. You push soaked strands of hair off your face and try to blink the rain out of your eyes. Thereâs a slight screech and you whip around to see the truck parked a few feet in front of you. It reverses slowly and you feel something like panic bubbling in your gut. You stumble back a few steps from the road, wondering if you should lock yourself in your car. Then the window rolls down and the person inside leans forward. âYou alright?â You want to lock yourself in his car. He has to be the most gorgeous man youâve ever seen, pretty brown hair pushed back as he glares out into the night at you. You find yourself tongue-tied, stuttering over your words until you finally push out, âBroke down.â Thereâs a slight curve to his lips as he glances back at your car. âNeed a ride?â Pretty privilege is real because if this was anyone else you would say no and get back to the safety of your car. Instead, you find yourself nodding dumbly, eyes still locked on his. He laughs a little and hops out, his shirt instantly sticking to his skin. You have to physically stop your jaw from dropping when you see the outline of muscle underneath his flannel. âGet in,â he shouts over the downpour. You nod, opening up his door and throwing yourself inside.Â
lumberjack!logan supremacy
Hey! Love your writing and love Flux!! I was hoping to request a kind of angsty/fluffy fic with the worst!wolverine where the meet her in the void and maybe Logan knew her just not very well and heâs finally letting himself open up and be close with her (likewise with reader/flux towards logan) and they get into an argument or maybe logan has a nightmare and he ends up stabbing her with his claws and maybe the aftermath of him beating himself up and sabotaging the new relationship until reader finally snaps him out of it and says it was an accident and she still loves him?? Thanks!!
Logan Howlett x fem!reader
a/n: I want to thank you for this request because I've been having the worst writer's block in the world. I was worried about having to go into another unofficial hiatus, but this made something in my brain click together and I knocked it out in two hours. my life is yours đđ Summary: You know him. Or, you knew him. And you never blamed him for what happened in your world. It wasn't his fault that everyone you loved died and you barely escaped with your life. But you never actually thought you'd have to see him again. You don't know what to do when all these feelings resurface with his appearance.
No one truly knew who you were back in your universe. After the horrific incident at the mansion, you had run. Youâd run as fast and as far as you could from the slaughter of your friends. Youâd barely escaped with your life, and from the amount of blood and gore theyâd left behind, most people just assumed you were dead.Â
Itâs not like anyone cared about you. Scott, Ororo, and Jean had been the real heroes. But it didnât matter because they were still mutants at the end of the day. It didnât matter how many people they saved. How many lives they positively changed, no one would ever see past the fact that they were mutants.Â
Being one of the newer members of the recently disbanded X-Men gave you enough anonymity to get through daily life without being recognized. It did not, however, protect you from being sucked into the shit fest that is the multiverse.Â
Youâre not sure what it is about you that just attracts bad luck. You donât know if itâs some hidden power thatâs a part of your evolution. Youâre just apparently perpetually fucked. The TVA had determined that you were interfering with the proper flow of your timeline or some bullshit.Â
Now youâre here. Stuck in the void with nothing but decay and drunk former superheroes. If you have to watch one more Captain America ârally the troopsâ youâre gonna kill him yourself. Youâve considered switching teams and joining Cassandra Nova at times. If only so you donât have to deal with Johnny Storm and the rest of the dipshits.Â
You get along with Laura, at least. She likes to tell you about her Logan and you like to dodge her questions about yours. She doesnât need to know that not every version of Wolverine has a golden heart and story worthy of tears. Yours was a fuck up, plain and simple, but you never thought the incident was his fault.Â
As much as others tried to push the blame on him. The people who raided the mansion were determined. There was no other way that day was going to end up. Youâd just have one less X-Man. But people always love a martyr more than a victim.Â
After a couple of years, you get used to the monotony. Your days are only occasionally broken up by dodging Cassandraâs henchmen and trying not to get sucked up into the soul destroyer. Other than that, you spend your nights getting drunk with Gambit and pretending you know whatever the fuck heâs talking about.Â
âLaura! I managed to find some chocolate!â You run into the hideout looking for the girl. Itâs rare to find good food that isnât already a month past its expiration date. You werenât planning on sharing the candy with her but you figured sheâd smell it on you and itâs not worth the fight.Â
Instead, you stop short as the familiar blue and yellow uniform youâd always try to force on him comes into view. Heâs stealing Gambitâs liquor and you know thatâs not going to go over well. What you donât know is why you are so sure that this is your Wolverine.Â
Youâve never had a Wolverine in the void. Not once. This could be any one of the hundreds of thousands of variants. But you see that look in his eye. That familiar watery gaze shows just how much he hurts, even if he doesnât want to admit it.Â
âLogan?â You breathe his name out in disbelief. Bypassing the Deadpool standing nearby. Youâve dealt with enough of those in your time down here. He takes a step back, fixing you with a distrusting look.Â
He keeps the bottle of alcohol clutched close to his chest like he thinks youâre going to take it. You track the movement and you scoff. âRight,â you shake your head and stop short. âOf course, the only thing you care about is still getting fucking drunk.â
He glares at you, taking a step forward like he thinks it might actually intimidate you. âDo I know you, bub?â He reaches forward, probably to jab his finger in your chest. You drop your gaze to his outstretched hand and narrow your eyes.Â
The material of his suit fluctuates, pulling back and rippling over his arms like liquid and not spandex. He doesnât notice the manipulation of matter until it's his skin you target. It melts off his adamantium bones and he stares down in horror.Â
You know he's scared because heâs watching his body dissolve but heâs not feeling any pain. You could make it hurt, but thatâs not what you want. You just want to see if heâll remember you now. If thereâs anything half-decent left in that alcohol-rotted brain of his.
âFlux,â he grits your X-Man name out through his teeth like it hurts him to say it.Â
You nod and his skin and suit go back to normal, like youâd never tampered with it in the first place. âYou do remember me, then?â
âThought you fucking died with the rest of them.â Your face drops before you feel an astonished smile on your face.Â
âYou know, itâs a comfort to know nothing about my world has changed. Youâre still the same spineless dick that left us all to die.â You shake your head and storm out of the hideout. You donât know how long theyâre planning on staying but you pray they leave soon. If you have to deal with him longer than a week, youâll just kill him.Â
You step outside just as Lauraâs coming back from the bonfire. She greets you with a stiff smile and you wonder whatâs got in her in a mood. It only takes a glance over her shoulder to find the reason.
Logan is sulking by the fire, nursing yet another bottle of whiskey. Heâs drinking it like water and even with his healing, his liver should have turned to mush by now. âI can see why you didnât tell me about him,â she mutters as she passes by you.Â
You know she tried to be quiet but you can see the way Loganâs head tilts slightly towards you. Heâs heard her and you know it has to sting just a little.
You glance down at the leaves under your feet, eyes glazing over as you feel the guilt sink into your stomach. You shouldnât feel bad, you didnât do anything wrong. You didnât hurt him, technically, just reminded him who you were. But you still feel bad for what you said.Â
Youâve never blamed Logan for what happened. And if you did, you would be a hypocrite. Because you survived too, and you left them all behind. You ran like a coward. You could never blame him when you failed to save them just the same.Â
You take in a deep breath and steel yourself. Youâll just apologize, walk over there, and explain to him you didnât mean what you said. You know heâll be a dick about it. Claiming he doesnât want your apology. Youâll just leave him alone after.Â
Youâre about to step forward when he barks out a gruff command, âDonât fucking stare at me like that. I donât want your company.â He turns back to the fire and takes another swig from his bottle.Â
You roll your eyes and walk towards him. âYou can be as miserable and self-pitying as you want, just let me say one thing.â
His head whips towards you so quickly youâre surprised you donât hear it snap. âIâm not fucking pitying myself,â he grits out. You quirk your brows in amusement, glancing towards the bottle in his hand and the clear way heâs sulking. He turns his attention back towards the fire, intent on ignoring you again.Â
âI donât blame you for what happened,â you tell him. You ignore the warning look he shoots you, taking a seat beside him even if he doesnât want you to. âI-â you choke on the words, struggling to admit to yourself what youâve never wanted to.Â
âDonât.â You know itâs meant to be a warning. But when you look at him and see how completely broken he is, it sounds more like a pathetic plead.Â
But you need to say this. As selfish as it is, you need to say this to someone., Need to unload this guilt youâve carried for so long. âI was there, Logan. I could have saved them and I didnât. I fucking ran.â
âKid, donât do this-â
âJean was still moving,â you blurt out. You feel the way your heart speeds up at the admission. Your fingers shake and the air around you stills.Â
His face drops and he slowly turns towards you. Youâre afraid to look at him. You feel like a bunny staring down the snout of a wolf, thereâs no escaping this. Youâve created this trap for yourself.Â
âWhat?â He demands. His voice has lost that tremor of vulnerability. Instead, he sounds like he did when he first found out what had happened to you all. That same deadly level of calm that makes you want to bolt again.Â
âShe,â you stare into the fire until your eyes burn. You donât know if itâs from the light or the smoke but the pain focuses you. âShe was shaking on the floor. There was blood everywhere and she could barely breathe. They had gassed us with something. None of us could use our powers, itâs the only reason they got a one-up on us.â
You can feel yourself slipping back into that moment. You feel the warmth of the blood on your skin. It seeps into your suit and makes the material cling to you. Your gut is split open and the only thing holding your intestines in is your hands.Â
Jean is in front of you. Her hands are twitching by her sides. Thereâs blood pouring out of her lips, dribbling down her tongue and cheeks. Every breath is a rattle so deep you feel it in your bones.Â
Each inhale sounds like someone dragging glass through the membrane of her lungs. Her chest rises and sinks shallowly as she gasps for air. Sheâs practically convulsing, eyes twitching every which way.
The gas has faded from the halls. The people have left, satisfied with the carnage. Youâre alone, surrounded only by the blood and bodies of your friends. None of the others are moving. Some of them are so mangled you canât even tell who they are anymore.Â
Jeanâs eyes lock onto yours. The only anchor she has. And you can see it, the frantic, wounded animal gaze on her face. She knows sheâs dying. She knows thereâs nothing she can do about it.Â
You can only stand by and watch as your friend dies. You could be her comfort. You could be the last face she sees before she dies, distracting her from the sight of her dead fiancee behind her.Â
But what do you do?
You hold your guts in your stomach and you run. You canât look at her. You canât look at any of them. You can hear her croaking behind you. And even when youâre out of the mansion, when youâre in a hospital somewhere getting repaired and Loganâs on a rampage, you still hear her.Â
You feel something heavy on your arm and itâs like you're being forcibly dragged out of a trance. Loganâs looking at you with something youâve never seen before. But itâs something youâve always desperately craved.Â
Itâs like heâs seeing you, really seeing you. For the first time in a long time, you feel that ache of guilt ease away ever so slightly. It doesnât disappear, but youâre sharing the burden with someone else and itâs a relief youâve desperately craved.Â
âYouâre not a bad person for leaving, kid.â He swallows roughly and you place your hand over his. He doesnât look completely comfortable with the touch, slightly flinching away from it, but he doesnât move. âIf you hadnât, you would be dead.â
You squeeze his hand, forcing him to meet your gaze. âI never blamed you for what happened.â emotion is so thick on your tongue and in your throat that the words come out a whisper. âTheir deaths werenât your fault, and what happened after wasnât.â
He clenches his eyes shut and jerks his hand out of your grip. You sigh, knowing youâve lost him. âI slaughtered them.â
You scoff, âThey slaughtered us!â You nearly shout, anger bubbling hot in your gut. When you heard about him killing those who had hunted down your friends, youâd celebrated. And when you heard the way the public was crucifying him, you realized that no matter what you did they would never love you.Â
You would always be nothing more than a mutant to them.Â
âAnd the people who didnât hurt them? The innocents I killed?âÂ
You donât have anything to say to that. You just stand up, placing a hand on his shoulder as you pass by him. âI never blamed you, Logan.â
You donât see Logan again after that. At least, not while youâre in the void. What was left of your little resistance was sucked up into the purple cloud of death. Only you and Laura are left with the carnage.Â
Logan and Wade have disappeared to who knows where. It stings, to be on your own again. Sure, you have Laura, but sheâll never understand the pain of what happened to your universe.Â
As much as it hurt, at least with Logan, you had someone to share the pain with. You could share your burden with him. You feel lonely and cold. Like thereâs a part of you missing. You finally figure out what that ache is when the TVA comes to collect you and you see him again.Â
Heâs standing behind Wade as he enthusiastically tells you and Larua all about his world. But you canât take your eyes off Logan, or the tentative smile on his face. Whatever had happened during that fight with Cassandra Nova had changed him, for the better.Â
You smile back at him and it feels like taking a breath of fresh air after years.Â
Apparently, whoever this worldâs Flux had been, she was fucking insanely rich. And dead, which sucked for her but was great for you and Logan.Â
Itâs not hard for you to fake some government identities and explain that youâd been mistakenly marked as dead. Itâs apparently pretty common in this universe. Superheroes are blipped out of existence all the time. You couldnât get all of her assets as some had been liquidated, but you did get her giant ass house.Â
You let Logan and Laura stay with you until they decide where they want to go. Itâs better than living with Wade and his coke-fiend roommate. Laura finds her groove pretty quickly, it is her world after all. But you and Logan struggle to figure out what to do with yourselves.Â
Neither of you has an interest in being X-Men again, and it seems like theyâre not incredibly present in this world either. You also hadnât been the best of friends, even before everything went wrong, back home.Â
Youâre not strangers, youâre not friends, youâre that awkward place in between. Each day is another opportunity to get to know each other. The progress might be slow, but you know that youâre getting closer to something real.Â
Itâs why you donât feel any qualms about running into his room when you hear him shouting. You burst into his room and the door slamming against the wall isnât even enough to wake him up.Â
Heâs writhing around in the bed, sheets twisted around his waist while sweat beads down his forehead. The noises heâs making remind you of a wounded animal. Thereâs something heartbreaking about this.Â
He doesnât get peace even when heâs sleeping. It makes you hurt for him. You want to smooth over the aches and pains he carries and burden yourself with them.Â
The thought snaps you out of your reverie and youâre shocked by the revelation. Youâd been growing closer to him, but you hadnât thought you were growing this close. You feel so strongly for him, but youâre not ready to put a name on what it is that you feel for him. You just know that right now you want to make him feel better.Â
You approach the bed cautiously, taking a seat beside him. The bed ripples and jolts underneath you as he tosses and turns. You place a gentle hand on his arm and shake, âLogan,â you whisper. You donât want to startle him too bad.Â
But heâs not responding to anything. It doesnât matter how much you shake him or call out his name. Finally, you canât handle it anymore. You get on your knees, sitting over him and bringing your palm down across his face as hard as you can.Â
In a second heâs shooting up. You donât even notice his hand until you see the way his vision clears. The visceral panic fades and something is aching in your gut. âOh god, no no no,â he says the word so many times it stops sounding real.Â
You look down and see the blood dribbling down his palm, the claws buried in your stomach. Itâs almost funny, how perfectly aligned they are with the scar that already lived there. The reminder of your friendâs death being erased and reformed by Loganâs hand.Â
He pulls his wrist back and you quickly snatch it up. âDonât!â You shout, jaw clenching against the pain. âDonât pull them out, Iâll just bleed out.â
âWhat the fuck am I supposed to do?â You know heâs worried, thatâs why he snaps at you. But it doesnât help the way you feel yourself fighting back tears.
He sees them drip down your cheeks and his face drops. His other hand, the one not in you, comes up and cradles your cheek. âWhat do I do?â He whispers, and he sounds more desperate than you do.Â
You know he doesnât want another death on his hands. But thereâs something beyond that. He doesnât want to be the reason you stop breathing. Thereâs a startling clarity when youâre slowly dying.Â
He cares about you. Just as deeply as you do for him. You canât make him go through this pain again. Canât let him suffer alone, not when heâs made so much progress. âSlowly,â you tell him, guiding his claws out inch by inch.Â
Itâs hard not to black out. Youâd barely felt it when heâd gotten you the first time. You think itâs because of how fast and sudden it was. But this, having them oh so slowly slicing through your insides is the worst form of torture.Â
But you donât heal like him. You have to close your eyes, focus on the pain, and forcibly reknit your skin back together. Itâs a clever manipulation of your powers, but itâs a slow one. You could never take serious damage on the field because you wouldnât be fast enough to repair yourself.Â
This is easy to repair. But that doesnât make it hurt less. It feels like an hour before he can safely draw them the rest of the way out. The second he does, youâre sinking into his arms with a pained sob.Â
He clutches you so tightly to his chest you worry your back might snap. He keeps muttering apologies into your hair, hands desperately grasping at every inch of you he can hold. Youâre too tired to say anything.Â
You realized you should have. You should have told him you donât blame him. You were the one who snuck into his room. You should have been smarter. But it doesnât matter how many times you tell Logan not to blame himself, he always will. And you were too tired to try anyway.Â
You only realize whatâs happening two days after the incident. You figured he might need some space to process what happened. And honestly, you did too. It was awful and incredibly draining. Youâve felt fatigued ever since.Â
But when you try and approach him and he just brushes past you like you werenât even there, you know something is wrong. You watch his retreating back with a disturbed glare. You connect the dots quickly, already knowing what heâs doing.Â
He doesnât want to be responsible for hurting another person he loves. He canât handle a loss like that again, even if itâs not by his hands. He wants to make sure you donât want him, that you donât care for him. Like that might ease the pain and guilt.Â
But it wouldnât. It would just make him feel worse. It would make you feel worse.Â
You donât waste a second, following him up the stairs and barging into his room before he can slam the door shut. It bounces off the wall and he lets out a deeply irritated sigh. He doesnât turn to look at you, just walks over to his nightstand and rummages around through the doors.
You know heâs not looking for anything. Heâs just trying to ignore you long enough for you to give up. Itâs not going to happen, he should know better.Â
You take a step further into the room and the smell of chemicals slams into you. Your nose wrinkles in disgust. It smells like he pumped Lysol into the vents. Your eyes dart to the bed and you sigh.Â
Your blood, youâd completely forgotten. He must have been cleaning it up the morning after. You canât blame him for wanting to get rid of the remainder. But this seems excessive.Â
âStrong nose,â he mutters. You hadnât realized youâd spoken aloud and you glanced over at him. âI can still smell it, even after cleaning.â He takes a seat on the bed and you hate the way his shoulders are slumped.Â
Heâd seemed so much more comfortable with himself lately. Itâs like one accident has undone all his progress. âLogan,â you start, taking a step towards him. He holds his hand up, still not looking at you.Â
Itâs driving you insane. You wish he would just meet your eyes. You feel like you could change his mind if he would just see you. Maybe thatâs why he wonât. He wonât let himself be happy.Â
âLook, that night just made me realize what a huge fucking mistake this was.â He gets up and slides something out from under the bed. It takes a moment for you to register what it is. A duffel bag, packed with all his essentials and what little clothes he owns.Â
Heâs going to leave.
You act without thinking. Pure panic making your powers surge out. Logan grunts and the bag falls out of his hand. âQuit it,â he snipes, bending over to pick it up. But he canât because itâs so heavy itâs making the wooden floor splinter and crack under its weight.Â
âYou donât get to just leave when things get hard, Logan.â
He stands up, hands propped on his sides. Thereâs a challenge in his eyes that makes you nervous. âFuck this,â he scoffs and brushes past you.Â
Itâs beyond manipulative to use your powers against him. But sometimes, someone is such a fucking idiot, they need a little outside help. You slam the door closed and the handle disappears, locking you both in his room.Â
He turns towards you with a fierce glare on his face. âOpen the goddamn door before I break it down.â
âYou can try,â you taunt, a nasty tone to your voice. Youâre sick of this. Youâre sick of running from what you want. Youâve been miserable and alone for years. You want to be happy. For the first time in forever, you want something.Â
And you want Logan to be happy with you. You canât force him to feel the way you do. But you can stop him from actively preventing this. âStop acting like a goddamn child and just talk to me!â You shout at him.Â
Thereâs a disbelieving look on your face. You donât understand why he wonât let this happen. Why does he have to fight so hard against any semblance of happiness in his life?
âIâm going to hurt you. That is all I do. I hurt the people I love and I cannot hurt you too.â Your eyes widen in shock at his outburst. Beyond anger, there was so much fear in his voice it was almost enough to make you miss what heâd said.Â
âYou love me?â You can see the realization dawn on him. The fact that he let slip why heâs so hesitant to be around you. You know he wants to leave, his eyes are darting around the room for an escape route, but youâve blocked them all. You canât let this go, not now.Â
âLogan,â you snap, demanding an answer from him.Â
âFuck you,â he mutters, something vicious on his face.Â
Heâs going to hurt you. Heâs going to lash out and say something cruel so that this doesnât happen. You know him because youâve been him. He will take every possible route to get out of this if it means he doesnât have to face his feelings.Â
You roll your eyes and take a step forward. You jerk him towards you and throw yourself on him before he can say something stupid. The kiss is brief, just enough to snap him out of this ridiculous headspace heâs in.Â
When you pull back he looks dazed, but heâs relaxed in your hold, sinking towards you. You grin up at him, âI love you too, dumbass.â You lean up to kiss him again but you dart back at the last second, a mean glare on your face. âPull some shit like this again and Iâm going to melt your dick off.âÂ
You kiss him before he can respond, but you feel the smile against your lips. You can taste the defeat on his tongue as he wraps his arms around you and tugs you into his chest. Heâs not going to push you away and youâre not going to let him.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorte Â
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl @allllium âĄÂ
Quick question what are Flux abilities? I keep thinking itâs atomic manipulation or matter manipulation but I could be wrong.
Also your writing is immaculate and stupendous. The angst brings me physical pain everytime I read something of yours but then I get happy but I still feel petty about the hurt heâs caused along the wayđ€
I'm including you both in this answer so I don't post this twice on accident.
SO đ the reason so many seemed to be confused about Flux's powers is simple. I don't fucking know what they are either. As I stated many times when I first started making my Logan stuff, I'm not good at superheroes.
When I started making the X-Man persona I thought, I want someone who is really powerful, but not to the point that it's shoving it down your throat. I wanted cool powers but not "oh, she can beat Jean and Charles and Magneto and she's basically a goddess". Fanfic like that is icky to me.
That's why she has "power" meltdowns, where she loses control because that keeps her humble. Her powers are essentially matter/atom manipulation. I'm not a scientist and I felt like putting exactly one google search into this so- essentially, she can manipulate anything that contains atoms/matter which is everything.
None of this is going to make sense ohmygod
In my mind, she mainly focuses her powers on shifting things between the three states, liquid, gaseous, and solid forms. Her powers are just manipulating the world around her, (I recommend googling matter manipulation superheroes bc it's not as uncommon as I thought)
She has power meltdowns because she has to constantly be in control of her powers. She has to make sure in a fit of anger she doesn't accidentally kill herself or those around her. She's constantly in a state of keeping herself in check and making sure she's not - without realizing it - hurting those around her. That's why she has those cuffs in some fics that dampen her powers because it's so volatile and she can't control them.
HOPE THIS MADE SENSE
as i've said before, i've got not fucking clue what I'm doing
Hey! Your writing is amazing! Iâve been checking daily for new fics lmao
I was wondering if your requests were open would you be able to write some angst with a happy ending w/ Peanut?
Perhaps a Shy!Reader who has flirty banter with Logan. Theyâre on a mission and Logan has to make a quick decision on who to save â Reader or Jean and he saves Jean without thinking. Reader ends up surviving with a few injuries but her and Loganâs relationship starts to deteriorate. Loganâs not good with verbal apologies so he does acts of service â bringing reader food/drinks etc. reader is stubborn and Logan starts to get frustrated. He eventually proves himself to reader.
Iâm sorry if this is confusing!! Iâm not creative enough to write it myself and youâre really really skilled. Love your work x
a/n: I read this request and then read them together and my brain imploded because I loved it so much, no smut in this one Summary: Logan saves Jean on a mission and it's the wake-up call you desperately needed to understand that you will never be her. You can't stand to look at him anymore and he doesn't understand why you've stopped talking to him.
âWhatâre you thinking of doing after this?â
You shrug, leaning back on the uncomfortable bench seats and looking over at Logan. âNot sure, got any plans?â
Logan smirks and you immediately know whatever heâs about to say is going to send you spiraling. âYeah, whatever youâre doing, sweetheart.â
Oh. My. God!
You know youâve got it bad when something as simple as that has you swooning. Itâs so easy to fall into this routine with him, to pretend youâre more suave than you actually are. Despite your usual tendency to fade into the background, you find it nearly impossible to do with him.Â
Where someone else might let you stay quiet and go ignored, he seeks you out. He makes you feel seen and heard. Some days you donât know if you appreciate it or despise it. You laugh a little, trying to hide just how affected by him you are. âSounds good, Lo.â
He smiles and leans back on the seat, his arm coming around the back to rest lightly over your shoulders. You can tell from the look on Stormâs face that sheâs trying not to laugh at you. You canât blame her, youâre sure your eyes have tripled in size and you look absolutely stunned.Â
Flirting isnât out of the usual for you and him. Lately, though, heâs upped the game. Touching you more than usual, spending more one-on-one time together. You can feel it all building up to something. Youâre shy, not stupid, you know when a guyâs going to ask you out.Â
But it feels like heâs dragging it out longer than necessary like heâs enjoying teasing you a little too much. âAlright,â Scott stands up and moves towards the back of the jet. âWeâre almost there, get ready.â
You, very reluctantly, pull away from Logan and get to your feet. He walks past you, briefly squeezing your hand before joining Scott by the ramp. You grin, flexing your hand by your side and trying to memorize the feeling.Â
The ramp lowers to the ground and Scott and Logan lead the way out. Youâre expecting this to be simple. Stake out the area, find some information about the people running the warehouse, and figure out what exactly it is that theyâve been doing.Â
The air is bursting with moisture. Itâs suffocating, how humid it is, how it makes the material of your suit cling to your skin. You know the rest of the team can feel it. That itâs irritating them just as much.Â
None of you want to be out here in the peak of summer, trying to be stealthy in these ridiculous costumes. Your thighs squeak every time they rub together. Itâs beyond embarrassing. You know that thatâs what has you all distracted.Â
Youâre struggling through ankle-deep mud and sweating buckets. So none of you are paying any particular attention to the area around you. Technically, you shouldnât have to, youâre still about a mile out from where you need to be.Â
You duck, hands coming up to cover your ears as Charlesâ voice screams through your mind. Itâs a trap!
Even with the warning, thereâs no time to prepare. The ground around you explodes, grass and dirt flying through the air. Logan grabs your arm, he shoves himself in front of you and takes the brunt of the bullets. Splatters of blood hits your cheeks and he runs you both behind a tree for cover.Â
The other three have all found their own cover and theyâre struggling to figure out where the shots are coming from. You spot something in the underbrush and scream, âBehind you!â
Itâs more of a warning to duck than it is to move. You throw your hands up, shoving the man away from them and sending him flying into the trunk of a tree. You swear you can hear the snap of his spine as it hits the bark.Â
You look to Jean and nod towards the small clearing of trees. âDonât,â Logan warns. But youâre already slipping out of his grip and solidifying the air in front of you. It provides enough of a cover, absorbing the bullets, and giving you all time to figure out a plan of attack.Â
Jean moves beside you, eyes narrowing on the perimeter of your cover. âThere are too many of them, more than I can count.âÂ
âHow did they know we were coming?â Scott snaps, keeping an eye on the area behind you.Â
Your arms struggle under the weight of your power. The more bullets they shoot into your cover, the harder it is to keep up. Youâre forced to absorb their energy, push it out tenfold to try and keep the blockage solidified.Â
âGuys,â you snap, âwe need a plan. I canât hold it much longer.â You grit your teeth, taking a step forward to try and push against the strain. It does nothing but make your bones ache. Logan shoots you a concerned glance, coming up behind you like he wants to take the weight off your shoulders. But thereâs nothing he can do.Â
Thereâs movement behind you, a boot snapping a twig in two. You canât risk looking back but you can hear the worry in Jeanâs voice. âTen of them-â
You can tell by the sounds of their movement that the others donât give her much of a chance to finish. Ororo, Scott, and Logan all shoot forward to deal with the threat. Ten isnât much to worry about. But that doesnât change the fact that the men in front of you havenât let up and youâre about to weep from the weight of keeping the wall up.Â
Jean stays beside you, brows furrowed in concern. She places her hand on your shoulder and closes her eyes. A second later you feel something like a cool blanket laid over you. The tension in your arms and core eases just enough for you to stop clenching your jaw so hard. Some of the strain eases away and you know sheâs sharing it with you.Â
But just as quickly as the relief was given, itâs yanked away. Jean jumps back with a gasp, âFlux, we need to move!â
âI canât,â you shout, fighting to be heard over the sound of bloodshed and gunshots going off in front of and behind you. The others are steadily moving through the people surrounding you, but their numbers are still overwhelming. âItâll all come crashing down,â you tell her.Â
She glances towards the bullets, finally spotting the way theyâre slowly, but steadily, moving through the thickened air. The second you let go youâll be riddled with holes. âShit,â she hisses. âLook, we canât stay here much longer-â
Sheâs cut off by a loud bang. Youâre so disoriented by the noise your hands drop to your sides. At the same moment, you hear wood splintering and cracking beside you. What has to be the largest tree in the forest creaks before it begins its descent down towards you both.Â
You donât what happened, or what they used, but it doesnât matter. The wall in front of you is fading. You have seconds to get out of the way of the bullets and the tree, youâre not sure either of you is going to make it.Â
âJean!â Thereâs a flash of brown hair and Jeanâs being tackled to the ground, safely out of the way of the tree and bullets. You feel something stinging against your shoulder and know the first bulletâs made its way through.Â
You also see the tree is almost over top of you. Youâve always been a fight response in flight or fight scenarios. But when thereâs nothing to fight, when you have nothing to go up against, you freeze. Itâs horrible, you know it, but thereâs nothing you can do about it.Â
Even as youâre desperately screaming at yourself to just fucking move, all you can do is watch as the tree topples down on top of you. âFlux, duck!â The words trigger something in your brain just soon enough to drop to the ground.Â
Scott releases a red beam, blasting through the tree and knocking it off course. You donât even register the smell of burning flesh as you lay in the mud. Your blood is rushing so fast in your veins, thereâs so much adrenaline pumping through you, you canât focus on anything except the sound of your heartbeat.Â
You let out a breath of relief, slowly lifting yourself up to your knees. You donât hear any more fighting and you figure whoever they hadnât taken down before, the beam took care of the rest.Â
You look down, checking yourself for any bullet holes or serious damage but you canât find anything. Something warm trickles down your shoulder, it drips across your arm and down your hand.Â
You look at the blood curiously, it seems to steady a flow from the simple bullet graze youâd had earlier. âOh my god,â Jean whispers your name and you turn around with a concerned look.Â
You want to ask her whatâs wrong but your eyes are trained on the way Loganâs arms are bracketing her. Heâs practically on top of her, only now getting up to check on you. You get it, it was a stressful situation, he acted fast.Â
But that doesnât make it any easier to swallow the lump in your throat. It doesnât ease the burn of betrayal. He saved her, not you. He chose her even though she doesnât want him. The anger youâre feeling only makes it harder to be aware of your surroundings.Â
Itâs not until Scott kneels behind you a presses a gentle hand against your back that you lurch forward with a loud cry. The pain slams down on you all at once. The wind blowing gently against your back feels like someoneâs dug razor blades in your skin and ripped.Â
Feet rush towards you, someone kneeling beside you and grabbing your shoulders. Logan forces you up and makes you look at him before his gaze turns to your back. âWhat the fuck did you do?â He practically growls, lunging towards Scott.Â
He grabs him by the collar and shoves him into the dirt. Ororo and Jean leap forward, trying unsuccessfully to rip him off. You try and keep your eyes open, try and stay focused. The pain is too much, you donât want to be awake for this anymore. Every nerve on your back feels like itâs being forcefully exposed and plucked at.Â
Your brain forces a shutdown and you slump into the mud, the world going black.Â
When you wake up, youâre on your stomach. Youâre a little dazed, not fully remembering how you got here. You try and sit up but thereâs a steady grip around your wrists stopping you. âDonât move,â Jean warns from somewhere behind you.Â
You try and look for her but you canât move much. Your head feels like it weighs a hundred pounds, stuck to the pillow beneath you. âWhat happened? Why canât I move?â
Her shoes appear in front of you and then sheâs kneeling down, a slightly worried look on her face. âWe needed to make sure you didnât roll over in your sleep.â Her brows crinkle and she frowns, âYou donât remember?â You shake your head minutely. She sighs, lifting her hand to your face and pressing her chilled fingers to your temple.Â
The images rush towards you. You see it all from her eyes. The way Logan had grabbed her and thrown her to the ground, checking over her and not once looking at you. How Scott had tried to stop the tree from breaking your spine. His beam had just barely grazed your back as you had ducked. But it was enough for there to be serious damage.Â
Through her view, you can see the way your skin had bubbled up and blistered. How horribly damaged it was. You have limited healing abilities, but it was enough to stop the nerves from being permanently damaged.Â
She lets you go and you groan, the pain slowly registering in your brain. Itâs dulled and you donât know if theyâve given you drugs or if your abilities are still working to help you. âHowâs Scott?âÂ
She chuckles and shakes her head while she undoes the restraints around your wrist. âHe feels awful. He keeps coming by to check on you.â
The thought of him sitting beside you while you were strapped down to the bed makes you feel a little bad. It wasnât his fault, heâd helped you. It was more than Logan had done for you.Â
You frown, hating yourself for being bitter. If he hadnât helped, Jean might not be here next to you. He had saved your friend. The thought didnât bring much comfort, though. âIâm not mad at him.â
Jean eases you onto your knees and slowly helps you sit up. It causes minimal pain, but itâs still uncomfortable enough to grit your teeth and dig your nails into your palms. âI know, but heâll probably be coming down here a lot to check on you.â
You almost ask her if anyone else has visited. If Logan had, but you donât think her answer would make you feel any better. âHe did,â she tells you and you click your tongue in irritation.Â
âOut of my head,â you warn. She releases you with a small grin. âI donât care,â you tell her, trying to appear nonchalant.Â
She tilts her head, eyes narrowing on you. âYes, you do. And I donât need telepathy to know.â She walks towards your IV bag, fiddling around with something on the line. âHe was here whenever he could be, practically lived beside you.â
âDonât care,â you tell her again, but thereâs less conviction this time.Â
Jean frowns and you hate how guilty she looks. Itâs not her fault heâs desperately in love with her and not you. You canât force someone to love you or choose you. And you donât want to. You want someone to love you for who you are, not because they couldnât have their first choice.Â
âDonât,â you say lowly. âDonât apologize, itâs not your fault.â
She doesnât get a chance to say anything before the door bursts open, both Logan and Scott sliding into your room. Scott lets out a relieved breath when he sees you. He breathes out your name and approaches with a guilty smile, âYouâre awake.â
âCharles told us,â Logan informs. You offer him a brief glance before diverting your attention to Scott.Â
Petty, youâre aware. But you donât want to see Logan right now. Youâd put so much effort and time into your friendship with him. It doesnât even matter if he doesnât feel the same way about you. You two are best friends, and he didnât even try to help you when you needed him the most.Â
So, you smile at Scott. You forgive him and you tell him you're fine. You chat with him and Jean while Logan just stares at you from the other side of your bed. You canât make yourself face him. You donât want to look at him, it makes you sick to your stomach.
Eventually, Scottâs guilt is slightly assuaged and he and Jean leave for the night. Logan is a heavy presence beside you, one you no longer can ignore. You shift around, pretending to fluff your pillows until he grabs your hand.Â
âWhatâre you doing?â
You look at his hand and then at him. Whatever look is on your face is enough for him to release you and back off. âGetting comfortable,â you spit out, more venom in your voice than necessary. Something clicks for him, you can see it as it happens.Â
He backs up and narrows his eyes down at you. âRight.â He frowns and sucks on his teeth, nodding his head silently. âIâll come back when youâre feeling a little better.â You donât miss the hidden dig underneath it all, the way heâs calling out youâre unusual behavior.Â
âI think thatâd be best.â
He scoffs and shakes his head, slamming the door behind him as he leaves. You jump at the noise and it makes you hiss as a twinge of pain shoots down your spine. You feel slightly guilty about the whole interaction. Then, you remember the way heâd been cradling Jean and you feel slightly vindicated.Â
Youâre sure he doesnât even give a shit. Heâs probably pouting in his room, wishing Jean was in bed beside him.Â
What the fuck?
Itâs all thatâs been playing through Loganâs head since he returned from your room in the medbay. Heâs waited days for you to wake up, so he can finally take a breath and let go of the anxiety thatâs been plaguing him.Â
Heâd thought that heâd lost you in that forest. When heâd gone for Jean, heâd assumed youâd just be able to use your powers to knock the tree out of your path. Or make it melt around you.Â
Honestly, he canât put a finger on what exactly he was thinking. But he knew that you could protect yourself and that would be your priority. So heâd moved without really thinking and grabbed the person who would be collateral damage if your powers went haywire.Â
And then you hadnât saved yourself and all he could smell was your burning flesh. The smell has been stuck in his nose since you were brought back to the mansion. He canât escape it. Everywhere he goes, he sees you burning and hears your screams.Â
Heâd thought that you were dead and there was a moment where he genuinely was so lost he could do nothing but watch as the others swarmed you. He couldnât move, couldnât help you. He could only stare at your still body and pray to anybody who could hear him that you werenât dead.Â
He didnât know what he would do if he lost you before he ever got a chance to love you.Â
Heâd, irritatingly, imagined all the different ways he would finally tell you how he felt when you woke up. Heâd prepared himself for every possible reaction, except this one. He hadnât expected you to reject him before he ever got the chance to confess.Â
Anger stews within him as he paces through his room. He knows that itâs unfair to be upset with you. Youâd gone through something horrific and there had been doubts about your recovery. Of course, youâd act off.Â
Except, you only seemed to be directing that at him. Had you been just as dismissive to Scott, the person who actually hurt you, he would have looked past it. Heâs tempted to go back down and see you again, maybe try and make you see some sense.Â
Instead, he decides to give you both some time to calm down. He doesnât want to do anything he might regret while heâs pissed off. Heâll see you tomorrow and, hopefully, youâll be back to normal.Â
Youâd thought Logan might have gotten the hint with how you behaved earlier. That was not the case. Heâs back today and you can smell the breakfast food heâs brought you. The smell is wafting deliciously from an inconspicuous brown bag.Â
But you know itâs from the restaurant thatâs twenty minutes out of his way. Youâre not petty enough that you canât appreciate the forty-minute round trip heâd taken for you, but you still arenât excited to see him.Â
âHey, sweetheart,â he smiles at you despite your clearly hostile energy. He tugs the chair towards your bed, ripping open the bag and pulling out enough food for the both of you.Â
You think it should be considered a form of manipulation to call you that while youâre pissed at him. He has such a clear effect on you. You know heâs aware of it. He knows that when he calls you something sweet like that it makes your heart race and stomach flip.Â
You turn your gaze towards your blanket. You pretend the thread pattern is the most interesting thing in the world so you donât have to look at him. Youâre sick of giving your all to men who couldnât care less about you.Â
Youâre tired of being the second, third, fourth choice. You want someone to choose you first for once. And you genuinely thought Logan would be the man to do that. But heâd chosen Jean. You should have known.Â
âAlright,â he huffs, crossing his arms and glaring at you. Youâre pissed off that heâs acting like heâs the one who was hurt. âWhat the hell is your problem? Youâve never been this mad at me before.â
Itâs his tone of voice that really grates on you. He genuinely does not understand what heâs done wrong. He doesnât even comprehend the possibility that you might be mad he left you to die. Have you really become such a doormat?
Yes, youâre shy and generally reserved with the people you meet. But he is so different. You two met and it was an instant connection that you thought was reciprocated. You hadn't realized that you'd become so complacent in the relationship he thought he could get away with something like this with no repercussions.Â
âYou left me to die,â you snap at him, voice taking a pitch it never has before. Youâve never truly gotten angry at him. Pissed off sometimes when he teased you a little too much. But youâd never plainly shown anger at him. âYou fucking left me behind and expect me to, what,â you scoff and shove the food back towards him.Â
âYou think some shitty breakfast is going to fix this?â His face contorts. It screws up into something like hurt and you worry you might have been too harsh. He doesnât know how you feel about him. He doesnât know that this would hurt you so bad.Â
But, it doesnât matter. Youâre still his friend. You should have at least warranted a little concern.Â
Just as quickly as it appeared, the hurt is washed away by his own anger. âI thought you could take care of yourself. Isnât that what youâre always bitching at us about?â
If you werenât so upset you might find it funny how quickly the two of you turned on each other. Clearly, there was something repressed between the two of you. Some brewing resentment that neither of you had ever acknowledged. The words are coming quickly now, without thought.
âFuck you, Logan,â you snap back at him. âYou didnât give a shit whether I lived or died. You only cared about your precious Jean.â You spit out her name with so much venom it stings as it leaves your tongue.Â
He laughs, getting out of his chair. He shakes his head and glares at you. His anger is always a physical thing. You know heâs pacing so he doesnât do something worse, like destroy the entirety of the room.Â
âThatâs what this is, youâre jealous? Donât blame your fucking incompetence on me.â You hate the way heâs speaking to you. Like youâre a little girl who's incapable of understanding even the most basic of concepts. He has such a patronizing look on his face, you want nothing more than to wipe it off.Â
The tables beside you tremble, the vases of flowers rattling against the wood. âIâm your friend, Logan. You could at least pretend like you cared about me.â
He leans against the end of the bed, tilting himself forward until heâs aggressively imposing your space. You shrink back against the pillows, narrowing your eyes in disdain. âDonât fucking pull that shit with me. I knew that your priority would be to save yourself and I acted accordingly. This wasnât some goddamn ploy to get into Jeanâs pants. Grow the fuck up, Flux!â
You flinch back at the volume of his voice. Unwillingly, tears pool in the corners of your eyes. Itâs an involuntary response. Sometimes you just get so enraged that you have no other way to get rid of it than to cry. Itâs infuriating to see the moment someone stops taking you seriously and starts to think youâre nothing more than a crybaby.Â
Loganâs face pales and he winces, backing away from you. âI didnât-â
âEnough,â you stop him, voice thick with unshed tears. He never calls you by your X-men name, itâs an unspoken agreement between the two of you. Thatâs a formality reserved for the other members. To each other, youâre nothing more than two people who care deeply for one another.Â
Or, you had been. Before this one moment had blown your life and your back up.Â
âI appreciate how much faith you have in my abilities, but the fact that your first instinct wasnât even to protect me says a lot.â You take in a deep breath and shake your head. âThanks for the breakfast, but can you please just leave?â
He looks like he doesnât want to. You know he doesnât want to leave. You two never fight like this. Even if there wasnât a lot said, itâs still not normal for you. Maybe that should have been your first hint that things werenât what you thought.Â
Itâs healthy to fight, to a certain extent. Sometimes it's needed. You two never have before and you know itâs just been brewing for a while, waiting to blow up. âI-â
âGet out,â you shout, and the tables beside you finally crumble under the weight of your emotions. They drip to the ground in an inorganic form of liquid wood. âShit,â you hiss, glancing over at them. You wave your hand and they return to their normal state, but it doesnât matter. You shouldnât have lost control at all.Â
The door slams and you look up to find the room empty. You sink back against your bed and run your hands over your face. You ignore the way the skin of your back screams in protest.Â
You embrace the pain, the fiery shocks running up your nerves as the bandages chafe against the wounds. You focus on that instead of how things have ended with Logan. You always had such high hopes that he might be the one you finally man up and confess to.Â
You should have known you were wrong. You should have known that it would never have ended with him picking you over her.Â
Youâre permitted to leave the medbay the next day. You donât see or hear from Logan for the following week. You canât confirm if heâs purposefully avoiding you or not but you have to believe he is. You both live in the same hall. You donât know how itâs possible to have gone this long without even catching a slight glimpse of him.Â
You force yourself to suffocate the part of you that misses him. You picture the side of yourself that longs for his presence and imagine shoving a pillow over her face. You donât want to ache and cry over someone who doesnât give two shits about you.Â
You keep reminding yourself over and over again that when things got rough he showed you his true colors. But itâs more difficult than you imagined to just completely disregard so much history with him.Â
Besides, you hadnât realized just how little you interacted with the others until Logan was out of your daily life. Itâs so difficult for you to bond with people that when youâd connected with Logan youâd latched onto him.Â
Itâs a little pathetic, honestly. Being grown and eating lunch alone because you only had one friend. You wonder if your feelings for him were genuine or born from a desperation not to be alone. You donât let yourself linger on the question for long.Â
Itâs as your training with the students that you finally see him again.Â
âHas he made much progress yet?â
Jean shakes her head and purses her lips. She watches as Billy, one of the newer students, struggles with the logs in front of him. He was a firestarter, a very inexperienced one who had only ever set his curtains on fire.Â
His powers were more focused on the mental aspect of things rather than the physical. Which is why you and Jean were in charge of helping him. He couldnât start anything on his own, he only really seemed to be able to activate the ability when he was emotionally stimulated.Â
That meant whenever he was mad or sad, or anything in between, everyone in a fifty-foot radius was in danger. He was a risk to the other students and you were both trying to be gentle with him. But youâd been working with him for so long and there was so little progress. It felt like he wasnât trying sometimes.Â
Heâd asked Rogue out a week ago and when sheâd said no, her hair had caught on fire. You know he could have been hurt and lashed out without thought or malice behind it. But youâd seen the look in his eye.Â
Youâre fifty percent sure he knows exactly what heâs doing. This little act he puts on is just to get himself out of trouble. You hadnât brought the issue to Charles yet because youâre trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.Â
âBilly,â you call out. His head whips up and he sends you a vicious glare. You canât help the sneer on your lips. âJust take a deep breath and try again. Thereâs nothing wrong with struggling, we all did.â
You put on your normal teacher voice, calm and collected. Assuring. But the little shit in front of you isnât buying it for a second. He gives you a sarcastic little grin, âRight. Sorry, I forgot youâre a fuck-up just like me.â
âBilly!â Jean snaps, taking a step forward to reprimand him. She doesnât get far before thereâs a fireball shooting out of his palms and hurtling towards the both of you.Â
Thereâs no chance to react before something slams into your side and is tossing you to the ground. Your head nearly snaps against the grass but thereâs a hand underneath your skull softening the blow.Â
You smell something smoking and look up to see a large scorch mark right where youâd just been. Jeanâs standing over it, palm outstretched as she keeps the fire subdued. She gives you a worried look, âAre you okay?â
Surprisingly, yes. You glance up to see Logan hovering over you. He backs off when he notices youâre okay, getting to his knees and offering you a hand. Wordlessly, you slip your palm into his and let him help you into a sitting position.Â
âYou alright,â his hand hovers over your shoulder like he wants to pull you closer. But he resists, backing off and waiting for your answer. You nod your head, still a little dazed from the failed assassination attempt.Â
He narrows his eyes, searching your face for any sign of head trauma. When heâs properly assured youâre okay he jumps to his feet. âBilly!â His voice booms across the courtyard and itâs the first time youâve ever seen that little asshole scared.Â
Heâs barely on his feet before Logan is stalking towards him, jerking him forward by the scruff of his neck and dragging him towards the mansion. âWe need to have a little talk,â the tone of his voice has you a little scared and youâre not even the one heâs mad at.Â
Jean walks towards you and helps you to your feet. âIs your back okay?â
âYeah,â you nod and brush your clothes off. You have to physically shake the shock of what happened off. âYeah, Iâm fine. I canât believe he did that.â
Jean scoffs and glares towards Billyâs back. Your eyes widen in shock when you see the large scorch mark across his arm. âJean! He got you, are you okay?â
She glances down at her shirt and frowns. âYeah, practically a sunburn.â She gives you a reassuring smile, âIâll be fine.â
As shitty as this sounds, youâre not concerned for her. You can only focus on the fact that she was in just as much danger as you and Logan had tackled you to the ground. You glance back towards the mansion, more fucking confused than ever.Â
Youâre not sure what compels you to follow Logan, but youâre running after him before Jean can stop you. Heâs barely got a minute headstart on you, youâre not sure why you canât find him. Youâd gone through every inch of the first floor.Â
You donât know where he would have dragged Billy, but itâs nowhere you can find. After about ten minutes of looking for him, you give up on the hope that youâre ever going to figure out whatâs happening inside his brain.Â
You let out a defeated sigh, running a hand over your face and trying to shake off the funk of the day. You canât believe that little shit tried to roast you. Youâre not comfortable with the fact that heâs just roaming around inside the mansion somewhere.Â
You turn out of the living room and nearly slam into someone. His hands shoot out, grabbing your shoulders and gently stopping you. âLogan,â you give him a strained smile. âI was looking for you.â You glance over his shoulder and frown. âWhereâs Billy?â
Logan sighs, his hands linger on your arms for a moment before he takes a step back. âWheels got to him before I could do anything.â
You laugh a little, the noise involuntary. âWhat were you planning on doing with the sixteen-year-old?â
He doesnât find the question amusing if his expression is anything to go by. âHe was really trying to hurt you.â
His words sober you up slightly and you drop the flippant attitude. âYeah, I wanted to,â god, it feels like you could choke on the words. Just last week you were screaming at him for not helping you. Now, you could barely thank him because he had.Â
âYouâre always my priority.â He tells you before you can struggle any longer. Your head shoots up and you stare at him with confusion. He groans, the noise tired and resigned. âSaving Jean was a mistake. I mean it, kid, I just thought you could handle yourself.â
You open your mouth but he stops you before you can argue. âI know, thatâs not the point. I should have saved you, no matter what I thought you could or couldn't handle.â
âNo,â you stop him and shake your head. âNo, Logan, I shouldnât. I,â your mouth opens and he stares at you expectantly. What you were going to say gets stuck in your throat. This is a horrible idea.Â
âI liked you in a way you didnât like me and it was unfair of me to push my expectations onto you.â You wanted it to sound better, and more intelligent. Instead, it came out in one rushed breath and youâre not sure he even understood half of what you said.Â
His brows furrow in confusion for a moment before a smile breaks out on his face. Youâre not sure if itâs a good or bad thing that heâs smiling. You canât tell if heâs mocking you or about to profess his undying love.Â
You donât have to wonder for long. He moves closer towards you, leaning forward until youâre practically sharing the same breaths. Unconsciously, youâre drawn into him, hands braced gently on his chest as you chase after him.Â
âWhat are you doing?â Your whispered words brush against his lips and he gives you a small smile. His hands travel up your waist. He tugs you closer, his other hand looping around your neck and craning you up.Â
âIâm gonna choose you every fucking time, kid.â His lips brush across your own and itâs like a switch is flipped in you both. Your arms twine around his neck, pulling him down until youâre practically melting into him.Â
Itâs everything youâve ever wanted and so different at the same time. You always thought your first kiss would be after some cheesy first date. He would have taken you out to dinner. Something would have inevitably gone wrong, you spilled something on your dress or the waiter brought the wrong order.Â
You would both worry that it was a sign that nothing would work out between you. And then, at the end of the night, heâd tug you into his arms and kiss you like you were the most precious thing heâd ever held.Â
That would be nice, but this is better. Heâs not holding you like youâre something fragile or something too precious for this world. Heâs kissing you like youâre the very air he needs to survive. Heâs greedy with his affections and demanding with his wants.Â
Youâre being consumed and devoured. And you never want to stop. This is all youâve ever wanted with him, from him.Â
Sadly, you do have to breathe. Youâre the one that forces the stop, youâre sure he would have happily suffocated if it meant he could keep touching you like this. You pull back, the air coming in short pants between your parted lips.Â
You can already feel them swelling, the slight irritation on your cheeks from his stubble. You donât mind, you quite like the feeling. He speaks before you can, a pleased smile on his face. âForgive me yet?â
You chuckle, a little impressed by how cheeky he is, still slightly pissed off. âWhy donât you do that again and Iâll think about it?â
He rolls his eyes but you can see the smile fighting against his firm glare. âYouâre really gonna make me work for it, huh?â
You smile and nod, leaning into him again. âYouâre never gonna hear the end of it,â you whisper before dipping down and kissing him again. You canât believe you ever doubted just how much he cares for you.Â
He didnât choose Jean over you. Heâs just a dumbass.Â
a/n: I had to resist putting in a âpick me, choose me, love meâ line in there bc that would have just been too much lol
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorte Â
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl âĄÂ
Hi!! Itâs me again, so Iâve been catching up on my childhood X-23 comics and I just thought Iâd show you Takedaâs take on Logan because heâs so cute here!
ah, yes, my magnificent short king
Thank you so much for sharing these! The art is incredible, he looks so pretty here. I love it when people nerd out with me. I've been thinking about getting into the comics. Do you have any suggestions on where should I start?
I know someone sent me a a message about if Iâm writing anymore Logan fics I AM DONT WORRY
ButâŠ.. would yâall read Van Helsing fics too? Idk just a thought.
Logan howlett x fem!reader
a/n: Had Mitskiâs âI Bet on Losing Dogsâ on a loop while writing this, now Iâm sad Inspired by the isle of dogs quote âIâm not a violent dog, I donât know why I biteâ BECAUSE OUCH (theyâre both toxic, fair warning) bittersweet ending Summary: You've tried for so long to get Logan to accept you the way he does the others. You want so desperately to be someone who means something to him. But he doesn't want you, maybe he never has. And you both seem to be stuck in this loop of hurting each other.
Youâre stability, security, but youâre never comfort. Try as you might, you just canât get Logan to accept you. You want to. So desperately, you want to be something good for him. But he hates you, or at the very least, he canât stand you.Â
You donât know what it is about Jean that he craves, but you wish you could replicate it. Youâre not your friend, though, you never will be. And itâs pathetic, trying to change yourself to make someone else happy. Youâve never done that before. Yet, there is something about Logan that you want so desperately to help.Â
You clean his wounds, metaphorically because heâs never once needed anyone for that. You lift him up after a rough mission and you remind him that the team does need him. They do love him. They want him in that uniform beside them, even Scott.Â
You have your suspicions that he doesnât appreciate your efforts. Heâs never outright said anything to you. But you can tell the novelty of your kindness is wearing off. He used to brush your efforts off with a simple look.Â
But heâs begun to be mean, saying these little things that you can never completely call out. A lot of what he says is based in truth. âDo you ever stop talking?â No, you donât. You like talking with your friends, like sharing stories, and laughing together.Â
âHas anyone ever told you to fuck off?â Yes, and it hurt. And it continues to hurt. âWhy donât you just shut up for once?â You canât. You canât because if you stop talking, if you stop distracting yourself then youâll actually feel everything. You canât stop talking, you canât stop taking care of others because you cannot take care of yourself. Youâre incapable of it.Â
You canât say that heâs being rude or mean. Heâs just being blunt, and gruff, thatâs just how he is. Thatâs what everyone tells you. They tell you to just ignore when heâs being a dick because he doesnât really mean it. Thatâs just what he does because he doesnât know any other way.Â
You shouldnât have listened. You shouldnât have placed so much faith in others. You should have just left him alone. Maybe then he wouldnât have snapped, wouldnât have said such cruel things to you.Â
It broke you a little inside. Hearing what he really thought of you. Despite it all, despite the cruel words and harsh attitude, you had hope. You thought they were all right, that he just needed to warm up to you. And you so desperately just wanted to be something for him to lean on because youâve never had that before and you know what it feels like to be so lonely.Â
âHey, Logan.â You step into the kitchen, rooting around in the fridge for something to snack on. âWerenât there apples in here?â Youâre talking aloud, but itâs meant for yourself.Â
Itâs that moment that it all finally comes crashing down. This pathetic illusion that he wants anything to do with you or your friendship. It almost makes you laugh, that this mundane moment is when you feel your heart shatter in your chest. When you get so sick to your stomach your bones ache and your limbs tingle with this odd phantom pain.Â
âCould you just shut up?â his voice is low as he leans over the counter. His fingers spin idly around the neck of a beer bottle. You wonder how he managed to sneak it in here, Charles has banned alcohol. You watch the condensation collect on the cracks of his palm and shrug the pain off.Â
Youâre used to this. This is normal. âRight,â you squeeze past him and look in the pantry. âSorry,â you whisper, if you speak any louder your voice will crack and that will just make everything worse.Â
âYouâre just always around, arenât you?â You glance over your shoulder at him but you donât respond. Deny it as much as he wants, you have gotten to know him. You recognize the tells.Â
Heâs had a bad day, he needs a way to get it out of his system. You just happened to walk into the kitchen at the wrong time. It could be anyone he snaps at, but today itâs you. Which seems to be happening more often.Â
You do what you did when you were a kid, eyes forward, face flat. You keep yourself neutral, let yourself sink into that apathetic place so whatever he yells at you doesnât hurt. âYou tiptoe around me, act like Iâm this wounded stray you need to fix.âÂ
Your brows pinch in confusion and you shake your head. Second mistake. You shouldnât have walked into the kitchen in the first place. And you definitely shouldnât have argued. âNo, Logan, thatâs not true-â
Although, maybe he has a point. You canât fix yourself so you try and fix him.Â
âI donât know why they keep you around. You contribute nothing, you do nothing for any of us. We canât even take you out on the field,â his voice begins to raise and you find yourself backing into the cabinets, hating the way this is beginning to make you feel. âYouâre so fucking sensitive we canât trust that you wonât just kill us all if something goes wrong! You donât deserve a spot on this team!â
You jump back as he shouts at you, hip jamming into the corner of the island so hard you have to bite your lip so you donât make a noise. Spit flies from the corners of his mouth, the ferocity of his voice and words are that strong.Â
You take in a few quick breaths, blinking the sting out of your eyes and focusing on the wall behind him. âGet it through your thick fuckinâ skull,â he warns, his voice quieter now. âI donât want you around. Leave me alone.â
You donât cry, you canât cry. You donât speak because youâre afraid of what other cruelties that might provoke. Maybe you would understand all this if youâd been bugging him when heâd already made it clear he needed space. All you wanted was a fucking apple.Â
You donât feel much of anything as you slowly nod your head, not agreeing but appeasing. He watches you with something like surprise on his face. You donât know that heâs wondering why youâre not saying anything back.Â
Itâs why he yells at you when he doesnât know what to do. You can take it, you can put him in his place. But youâre not speaking and he doesnât know why this time is so different.Â
Finally, you turn on your heel and leave, footsteps soft as you retreat back to your room. Logan watches you go with an odd twisting feeling in his stomach. He didnât think you could be pushed too far. You seem to always just have this endless patience.Â
You treat him gently, even when the others get sick of the way he processes things. Today was hard, you just happened to be nearby. He didnât mean half of what he said. He doesnât know why he lashes out the way he does, he just doesnât know what else to do.Â
He doesnât like it, contrary to what the others think. He doesnât like hurting you or being mean to you. He doesnât know what it is about you that provokes this side of him that no one else does. Maybe itâs because heâs afraid. He canât say what heâs afraid of, heâs never been able to admit it to himself.Â
Heâs yelled at you plenty of times before. You donât know what it is about that one day that was so different. Normally, it doesnât bother you. Youâll set him straight or give him space. But today, it was needless. You werenât doing anything.Â
You didnât deserve to be lashed out like that, cornered and scared in the place you call home.Â
It was unprovoked and maybe it finally made you see him for what he really is. A bully. It doesnât make sense, how he can be so kind and caring to Marie. How he can help Jean and Ororo so sweetly, but canât muster one kind fucking word for you.Â
You donât let yourself cry, even though you want to. Even though thereâs a cloying, suffocating feeling clawing its way up the back of your throat. His room is on the same hall as yours and you donât want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he made you cry.Â
You, at the very least, finally stop asking yourself what you did wrong. Instead, you start to wonder whatâs wrong with him. You get sick to your stomach, thinking about all the ways you cared for him. Remembering how much of yourself you gave up to make him happy.Â
He was right about that, you are pathetic. He never deserved your help or your patience. You should never have offered him any grace. Youâre embarrassed that you didnât see it sooner. This isnât a little boy pulling your pigtails because he likes you. This is a grown man who canât regulate his emotions and decided you were the next best punching bag.Â
You take in a few deep, shaky breaths and close your eyes until youâre forced to fall asleep. You donât want to think or feel any of what just happened.
Logan hovers in front of your doorway for ten minutes before he heads downstairs. Heâs got a class to run, he doesnât have time to wait for you to wake up, he reasons. Heâll find you later and apologize then.Â
It didnât take a genius to realize he had gone too far yesterday. Even if you could take his usual level of dickishness, you didnât deserve it. He just didnât know what to do around you. You made him confront so many different conflicting emotions. Itâs like every time he looks at you his brain is being ripped in twenty different directions and he doesnât know what to do.Â
Youâre so endlessly patient and gracious. It makes him realize he wants to be a better man and he canât be. He resents you slightly for that. For having such a wonderful idea of what he could be, even though he knows he can never be that man. Â
He doesnât find you that day. He makes up enough excuses that he goes to bed promising himself heâll apologize tomorrow. Which he never does. Because actually saying it would be an admittance that he knows what he did was wrong. And what does that make every other time heâs yelled at you? What does that make him?
It returns to the same cycle it always does. He waits a few days until things are cooled down and youâll have already forgotten about it. He starts to feel overwhelmed and he goes to find you because you always know what to do. And if you donât, then you provide an outlet.Â
He spots the back of your head in the gardens. Youâre with Jean and he expects the usual dirty look she gives him after youâve both fought. Instead, she smiles warmly at him and waves. Which is odd, usually you tell her about whatâs happened between the two of you and she holds the grudge longer than you do.Â
You glance over your shoulder, a small smile on your lips, to see who sheâs waving at. Logan sees the way it falls when you see him and his steps falter. You never do that, you always look so happy to see him.Â
âJean,â he greets curtly, eyes on you.Â
She says hello and they both look to you. Normally, you would have already spoken. But you donât, you turn your eyes to the kids. Jean frowns and turns back to him, âEverything alright, Logan?âÂ
He canât take his eyes off of you. You read his moods, and know them better than he does. You should have already offered to talk. Maybe he really does need to apologize. The thought leaves a sour taste in his mouth.Â
He says your name and your brows just barely raise in question, though you couldnât seem less interested. âNeed to talk to you.â
You shrug, âSorry, canât. Iâve got a meeting to get to.â You brush past him and walk back into the mansion. He and Jean both watch you go, each of them shocked by how dismissive you were. Thatâs never happened before.Â
âWhat the fuck did you do?â Jean demands, the smile gone from her face and her tone deadly. She glares at him, clearly expecting an answer. But he doesnât have one. Because this is something heâs done a million times and this has never happened. He doesnât know whatâs gone wrong.Â
He thought your absence would be a relief. After a few more days he begins to realize that he was wrong. He thought that not having someone constantly badgering him to be better and set good examples for the kids would be a relief.Â
Thereâs no one nagging him. No one forcibly checking on him after a mission when he doesnât need it. No one to care.Â
There are chunks of his day that you would normally fill that now seem to drag on. Lunches are quiet without you constantly rambling about nothing in his ear. When thereâs friction among the team and theyâre ganging up on him, you remain silent. He supposes he should be grateful.Â
You finally listened to him for once. But heâs angry. He always seems to be angry and he doesnât understand why. There is so much of his mind and life that was stolen from him. He wonders if he got any of it back if it would explain why he is the way he is.Â
It doesnât matter because it wouldnât fix what he canât undo. He sees you with the others constantly. Youâre always laughing, always happy. Like nothingâs happened. Like you havenât cut him out of your life completely. And then, when youâre around him, itâs like a switch is flipped.Â
Youâre irritatingly silent. Practically a brick wall. He pokes and he prods, using every weapon in his arsenal to try and provoke a reaction from you. But you give him nothing.Â
There is an ache in his chest when he sees the way your smile drops when he walks into a room. He doesnât understand the feeling. This is exactly what he wanted. To be left alone.Â
It feels so wrong.Â
It happens in the kitchen again. Odd, that thatâs become such an important place to you.Â
Your back is to the entrance and youâre busy slicing up some fruit for yourself. You donât hear him come in. Not until he speaks. âIâm-â you jump at the sound of his voice. Whirling around with a shocked look on your face.Â
He chuckles a little at the reaction but when you donât smile he stops. âIâm sorry,â he blurts out. It sounds semi genuine. But it also sounds like it hurt him to say. âIâm sorry, so can you please just stop ignoring me?â
You shrug and go back to cutting up the fruit. âIâm not ignoring you.â
âNo?â He demands. âThen why donât you talk to me? Why donât we eat lunch together anymore? You canât even fucking look at me.â
You slam the knife down on the cutting board, taking in a deep breath so you donât do something you regret. Your nails dig into your palms, trying to center yourself. âIâm doing exactly what you wanted,â you utter, voice low.Â
You turn just enough to make eye contact. âIâm leaving you the fuck alone. Thatâs what you wanted right? I donât think I could have misheard while you were screaming it at me.â You turn to leave, abandoning your fruit because you donât have an appetite anymore.Â
âI didnât mean it,â he whispers before you can make it out of the kitchen. âI,â he stops and starts again, âI miss you. Iâm not a mean person, I donât know why I hurt you.â
You stare at him, face unflinching. You give him nothing and he knows it's what he deserves. âI donât deserve your forgiveness, and Iâm not asking for it-â
âGood,â you cut him off with a disgusted sneer. âBecause Iâm not looking to hand it out. Especially not to you. You only want me because you miss what I do for you. You donât deserve my forgiveness. You donât deserve me.â You turn on your heel and walk away from him, unwilling to entertain any more conversation.Â
This is what youâve always done. When someone hurts you, really irrevocably hurts you, theyâre gone. Theyâre gone from your life. From your mind. More importantly, your heart. You donât have any obligations to entertain him or speak with him outside of professionalism.Â
You thought cutting him out of your life would hurt more. But itâs like you can breathe for the first time in months. Youâre no longer striving to gain someoneâs approval. Youâre not chasing after something youâll never catch.Â
You can find happiness within yourself. Begin to do the things you would do for him, for you. Itâs a relief. And a little sobering. Perhaps, in your mission to help him, youâd burdened him with the desires you had for yourself.Â
You believe that youâre unfixable. You believe there are facets of yourself that are too dark to face. That you are undeserving of love and kindness. You recognized those things in Logan and tried to force on him what youâve always wanted for yourself.Â
It was wrong. A mutually toxic relationship that never would have made it far had anything actually happened between you two. You canât paint yourself the victim and you never meant to. Itâs why you didnât tell anyone what happened between the two of you.Â
They wonder, of course, why you no longer spend lunches together. Why you no longer rush to defend him when he doesnât need the help. Why you donât smile around him anymore. There are questions that you deflect. Saying, you just needed space from each other.Â
Your harm was a silent one. Forcing him into a mold he was never going to fit in. Despite the claims of loneliness, you can see the way your absence benefits him. Heâs calmer, less likely to yell when provoked. He just needed the space to find himself. Not to have someone try and make him something new.Â
You feel an ache in your chest when you think about how differently things could have been had you just let him be. If you had let things happen between the two of you naturally then maybe you really could have been something great.Â
A month goes by without speaking to each other. After that day in the kitchen, he seems to understand that thereâs no putting back together what was broken. It was already cracked to start with, the break was inevitable.Â
You warm slowly to him. Give him polite greetings when you see him. And he smiles at you sometimes, on the jet when Scott says something ridiculous, or just in passing. Itâs nice, being a stranger to him. Itâs comforting.Â
âWe need to stop meeting like this.â
You look up from the paperwork in front of you and give Logan a small smile. Heâs hovering in the entrance to the kitchen and you know heâs waiting for your permission. âHi,â you say softly.
He takes that as the go-ahead and walks in, heading for the fridge. You listen to him rummage around before he pulls out a beer. âWhere do you hide those things?â You ask, and you almost bite your tongue. This is the most youâve spoken to each other in a long time. It feels wrong to joke so easily.Â
âCanât tell you or Wheels is gonna stop me,â he grumbles. You just nod and turn your head back to your paperwork. Itâs silent for a few minutes after that. He sits a little further down the island, nursing the beer while your pen scratches across the reports your students gave you.Â
He clears his throat and you glance over at him from the corner of your eye. âI,â he starts but quickly closes his mouth. âAh, forget it.â
Your brows pinch in confusion but you decide to leave it. You oddly donât feel scared or anxious. You donât worry that heâs going to snap at you if you provoke him. You choose not to because youâre not interested in engaging.Â
You donât really recognize the man before you. Maybe itâs because you never tried to get to know him before you tried changing him. It causes that familiar clenching feeling of guilt in your gut.Â
You know if you gave him a chance things would be different. You could be friends, real friends. Thereâs a reason you latched so readily onto him. Thereâs a familiar pain in him thatâs reflected back in you.Â
You stand up, shuffling the papers into a neat stack and pushing your stool in. Logan straightens up as he watches you wash off your dishes and collect your items. Before you can make it out of the kitchen heâs standing from his chair.Â
He stops in front of you, hand outstretched before him. âLogan,â he greets.Â
You tilt your head in confusion, glancing between him and his hand before it finally clicks what heâs trying to do. Start over, reintroduce yourselves. Actually give each other chances to understand the other.Â
This all started because you shared the same pain and you resented each other for it. But you could comfort each other instead. Be pillars of stability and strength in each otherâs lives instead of trying to tear the other down so you donât see yourself in them anymore.Â
You were both too afraid to face who you truly are and it nearly destroyed you. But this is a stranger in front of you. You donât know this man, but you think youâd like to. You give him your name and shake his hand firmly. âNice to meet you,â you whisper, a slight joke to your tone.Â
He holds on for a second longer than he should, the breath rushing out of him like he hadnât thought you would accept. You smile softly at him before you pass by to go upstairs. His hand lingers on your, skin tingling under your touch until you can no longer hold on.Â
You donât know what it means for you, this odd new truce between the two of you. But you wonât linger on that tonight. Youâll go to bed feeling comforted that for the first time since youâve met him, Logan has made you happy.Â
a/n: felt more like a diary entry than a fic, sorry lol
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always âĄ
Can you feed us some sfw and nsfw alphabet headcanons for Wolverine?
a/n: I picked and chose what I wanted from the SFW alphabet because I didnât like all of the prompts for that/didnât have ideas for all the letters. NSFW is directly after SFW and I did relatively the whole alphabet for that one. Even though I havenât written any smut ever and itâs kind of against my blog rules. Bc this man is destroying my morals and integrity Yâall need to remember that it has been about a decade since Iâve watched any X-Men movies. This might not be completely character-accurate.Â
A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
Big fan of side hugs, platonic or otherwise. And I just know heâs a walking heater, so heâs always warming you up
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
Heâs the big spoon, likes knowing youâre safe in his arms, itâs comforting to him
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
He wouldnât mind fucking off somewhere to the mountains and getting away from all the bullshit. He can take care of himself, heâs a decent cook and sort of tidy, but the more domestic roles would fall on his partner.Â
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
Brutally mean. In my head, the only reason heâs leaving is to protect you from something. And if the goal is keeping you as far away as possible then heâs going to be cruel and downright vicious to make sure you never want to come back.Â
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
Very gentle physically. He hates the idea of ever being the reason to physically cause you pain. But heâs less versed in being emotionally gentle. Heâs blunt, if he hurts you itâs not on purpose and heâll usually apologize for it once heâs realized his mistake.Â
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
Iâve kind of already covered this but he prefers hugs in showing physical affection. It feels secure to be holding you if that makes sense. He loves knowing that youâre safe in his arms. He does it relatively often, but especially when he notices youâre upset. I just know he gives the best hugs in the world.Â
I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)
Not very fast. Heâs a bigger fan of action rather than words. You know he loves you before he verbally confirms it for you. And by that point, it doesnât even really feel necessary to either of you. You know you love each other, know youâll always have each otherâs backs. (this is just making me realize how lonely I am ew)
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when theyâre jealous?)
I wouldnât say he gets jealous, more overprotective. He knows you wouldnât cheat on him or give in to someone flirting with you. But if someone canât take the hint the first time you say no, heâs throwing hands, no hesitation. Thereâs no attempting to stop him, heâs on the guy before your second No is even said.Â
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)
Slow, so slow. You guys could be old and dying and heâd randomly let slip another trauma he has that he never bothered mentioning and youâre just like, wtf
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)
Depending on who's pissing him off, 0-60 in ten seconds. If itâs you, he has more patience than he would for some stranger on the street. He offers you a bit more grace and usually if heâs pissed at you he just snaps at someone else so he doesnât upset you.Â
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)
Heâs extremely protective. Even if youâre not dating and are just close friends, heâs watching over you every chance he gets. Heâd have your back during missions/fights, not overbearingly, but heâd keep his eye on you to make sure youâre okay. I donât think he has a specific idea of how heâd like to be protected because heâs not used to someone doing that for him. But heâd be appreciative of a partner who stands up for him.Â
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
Minimal, from beginning of relationship to end. Heâs just not the kind of guy to make a huge deal out of everything. Thatâs not to say he doesnât put value on moments like that. But his celebrations are always small and his gifts are usually one or two things that hold a lot of sentimental value for you both
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)
Being emotionally constipated. Heâs not good at the whole talky-talky thing. He shoves shit down until it just explodes out of him.Â
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
He wouldnât die without you, but there would always be a part of him that ached and longed for you. Youâd be haunting his narrative like the wife that dies at the beginning of every movie ever
Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)
Night terrors đ You have to be sneaky about this one, I mean ninja roll out of bed so he doesnât accidentally impale you with his claws
âżââââââââ  â âââââââââŸÂ  Â
Let's get freaky đ©
A = Aftercare (what theyâre like after sex)
He just lays with you, curled up around you. Heâll clean you up but heâs reluctant to let go of you right after youâre done. You love being curled up in his arms and he just appreciates the feeling of comfort you bring him.Â
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partnerâs)
Itâs cheesy but he loves your smile. Seeing you smile just makes him feel good inside. His hands also have a tendency to drift to your ass when youâre having fun.Â
Likes his arms/hands, but that really just has to do with the imagery they bring of holding you/your hand
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Likes cumming inside you but his favorite is to flip you over and finish on your back/ass. Seeing you painted in his cum, visibly marked by him, triggers some primal feeling of possessiveness inside him
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
This is less sexual in nature but I think the first few times you did it, his claws would come out when he came. You kept trying to come up with different lies about why you needed Charles to keep replacing sheets/beds but he saw right through you. Literally
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what theyâre doing?)
From what Iâve learned about the comics, he was getting passed around that mansion like a toy. Everyone wanted a turn with him, he was the #1 harlot. So, yes, he knows exactly what heâs doing. And sometimes youâre secretly worried you might not be able to match his freak because he has got it on with everyone
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Itâs a toss-up between draped over your back and rutting into you like an animal and having your legs thrown over his shoulders, moving in deep and slow. It just depends on if he wants to drag this out or if heâs desperate to feel you come around him.Â
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Not really goofy, he might screw around after and he can be lighthearted during the moment but heâs not actively making jokes. If one of you does something embarrassing heâll laugh it off or just completely ignore it and keep going.Â
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Mayhaps this is my own personal biases showing but man is hairy. Everywhere. Itâs not a jungle down there, he keeps it trimmed, but the bush is solid.Â
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Itâs always extremely intimate, you two are completely enwrapped in each other. But a lot of times sex is used to blow off steam when you hit a rough patch in the relationship. Like Iâve said, he works through actions, not words. More often than not youâre having rough, I mean rough sex. Scratching each other up and battling for control. Thatâs not to say he canât be romantic, but it tends to be more wild than anything.Â
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
If heâs got you then heâs not super interested in masturbating anymore. Heâs got a high sex drive so more often than not heâs just dragging you off somewhere. I do think that he likes to play a game with you. Youâre both masturbating, watching the other get closer and closer, and seeing who snaps and makes the first move.Â
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Again, personal bias, but I think his mutant abilities allow him to tap into a primal/animalistic side that most guys wouldnât touch. And I think this shows through with predator/prey play. He likes chasing you around, catching you and pinning you down, showing you who's stronger and faster.Â
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Bed, itâs basic, but he likes to be able to toss you around a little. Plus, heâs got an insane amount of stamina, he needs somewhere that you can both be as loud as you want for as long as you want.Â
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
You, just you. Youâre like a drug to him. Knowing that youâre his and he gets to have you all the time is enough for him. But oddly, I think making you laugh would turn him on. I donât know why, I canât explain it, but knowing heâs the reason youâre smiling and happy gets him going.Â
N = No (something they wouldnât do, turn offs)
He likes getting a little rough with you but I donât think heâd be okay with seriously doing damage. He probably wouldnât draw blood or bring his claws out during sex because heâs afraid of doing serious harm.Â
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
He loves receiving but his preference is giving. Man is a certified munchâąïž
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Again, depends on if you've pissed each other off or not. More often than not, he takes it slow with you. He enjoys the intimacy of the act, being able to feel you, and have you bear yourself to him with the utmost trust is something he takes pride in. so, he likes to savor the moment.Â
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He loves them, loves the risk of getting caught. His favorite thing to do is drag you into an empty room and clamp a hand over your mouth, telling you to be quiet or youâll get caught. You never have before, but you donât think heâd stop if someone did walk in.Â
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Game to experiment with most things. I doubt heâs a huge fan of extreme play, heâs basic I would say but not vanilla.Â
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Your heart would give out before heâs done with you
Refractory period? We donât know her
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
You guys donât use toys because you donât need them. That doesnât mean heâs against using a few on you, but itâs not something thatâs a facet of your sex lives.Â
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Oh, heâs a little bitch about teasing you. You canât last half as long as he can during sex so he likes to edge, drag your orgasm on and on and on until you canât take it anymore.Â
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Not very loud. I donât think he cares about making noises/thinks theyâre embarrassing. But he tends to make quieter noises, low grunts, and growls, breathless praises whispered in your ear.Â
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Perchance this is because Iâm going absolutely feral and insane for him, but I think heâs put out a cigar on you before. (WITH CONSENT) (please god, one chance)
X = X-ray (letâs see whatâs going on under those clothes)
I know itâs THICK. You didnât think it would fit the first time you guys had sex, but he made it work.Â
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Wants you 24/7 365, if it was up to him, you two would just never be apart from each other.Â
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Not fast at all, he probably smokes or has a drink. Heâs got insane stamina and practically no refractory period. So, while youâre boneless and dead to the world he could probably go another round.Â
a/n: yes, I did make that picture at the top. If I ever saw him in real life I probably would throw myself at his car.
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always âĄ
bodyguard!logan howlett x congressman's daughter!reader
a/n: the fact that he was canonically a bodyguard makes me absolutely insane someone congratulate me, I finally figured out how to make my own dividers Summary: He's learned from past mistakes that no matter how tempting the girl is, it's better not to get involved. He just needs some cash, he doesn't give a fuck how pretty you are. He doesn't care about you. He makes it clear he wants nothing to do with you besides seeing you sign his check. But, is that really all he wants? You're not blind to the way he looks at you. 18+ MDNI Shameless smut at the end, I'm not sorry about it at all.
Logan had gotten used to this. The long drawn-out wait to meet with the man who wanted to hire him. He always arrived right on time, not a moment earlier. They all had the same game they liked to play.Â
The secretary would greet him, a pretty girl in her 20s that the men were screwing or trying to screw. Then they would make him sit in the lobby for half an hour. Theyâd apologize by pushing the blame on someone else, saying a meeting had gone on too long. But there wasnât a meeting. There never was.Â
They liked to make themselves seem more important than they were. It was a power game, an intimidation tactic that he had always scoffed at. He didnât give a fuck what government ties they had or otherwise. He just wanted his paycheck.Â
This one was no different. A congressman who had only recently begun to make waves when he started up an anti-mutant agenda. Ironic that he had specifically requested Logan for the very thing he was trying to eradicate.Â
There was a buzz and then the secretary was picking up her phone. She spared Logan a fleeting glance before whispering something into the receiver. She looked over at him and he already knew what she was going to say. âHeâs ready for you now.âÂ
âThanks, sweetheart,â she gave him a coquettish smile as he made his way towards the large office at the end of the hall. The door was closed when he reached it, three quick knocks and then a quiet Come in.Â
The man didnât even look up to greet him. He continued signing something on his desk. Logan took a seat in one of the chairs, waiting for another few minutes before he was deemed important enough to address. He received a tight smile and narrowed eyes as the man took in the way he was dressed.Â
He never dressed up for these things. Heâd learned a while ago that a suit wasnât going to get him any further than his leather jacket was. Might as well be comfortable while talking to these pricks.Â
âHad a phone call with an associate of mine. Ran on longer than I meant it to.â Always an excuse, never an apology.Â
Logan scoffed and shrugged. âI was fine.â
The man sniffed, âIâm sure. Look, Iâll cut straight to the chase. You come highly recommended by my peers and I need help fast.â Logan nodded, motioning for him to continue. The manâs eyes lingered on his fists for a long while before he finished. âItâs my daughter. Things have been a little rough for her at school, for lack of a better word. Especially since this new campaign started. I just need someone to keep a closer eye on her.â
Loganâs eyes narrowed, âShe a party girl or something?â He wasnât sure he could handle another bratty daddyâs girl again. The last one had nearly made him blow his brains out. They always think flipping their skirts up will let them get away with more and he canât stand it.Â
The manâs face blanched and he shook his head so vigorously that his jowls moved with him. âOh, no, not at all. But sheâs,â he paused and lowered his voice. He leaned in closer to Logan and waited for Logan to do the same. He rolled his eyes but did it anyway. âSheâs like you, you know.â
Logan shot him a grin, âYou mean a mutant.â
âLower your voice,â he hissed, face tightening up in anger. âBut, yes, a mutant. And I need one to guard her.â Ironic, this man was driving a campaign to make mutants second-class citizens, and his daughter was one. But Logan needed a check, he didnât give a fuck about the morals of it all.Â
âSounds good to me.â
âPerfect, you can pick her up from school for me.â
You had your earbuds in, head lowered while you made the trek across campus when you noticed him. He was difficult to miss, tall and buff. Very buff, youâre surprised that tank top of his hasnât ripped every time he flexes.Â
Your dadâs newest campaign has you hyper-aware of your surroundings. You canât afford to let your guard down. Not after the last attack.Â
Thereâs something about this man that tells you he isnât someone looking to jump you, though. Youâre not sure what it is. Every part of him screams danger, but not the type youâre looking out for. The cigar perched between his lips, the glistening muscles you want to bite, heâs trouble.Â
When you spot him outside your lecture hall for the third time that day, you finally figure out whatâs happening. Your dad had told you heâd hired someone new to watch over you at school. You hadnât voiced just how against it you were, but you didnât like the idea.Â
You didnât mind this guy, though. He wasnât busting into your classes and embarrassing the shit out of you by making everyone empty their pockets like the last guy. He just lingered. You could deal with lingering.Â
What you couldnât deal with was the way he was leaning against his motorcycle, smirking as you slowly approached him.Â
âDid my dad hire you?â You call out, tugging your earbuds out. âWho are you?â
He speaks around the cigar like it's second nature. âYour new bodyguard, sweetheart.â You suck in a deep breath when you hear his voice. Heâs extremely attractive, you're surprised your dad would risk this.Â
One of the other ones had kind of gotten a little obsessed, stalking you even in his off hours. You didnât think your dad would want another pretty boy around you. Though, you suppose this one isnât pretty. Heâs extremely handsome, ruggedly so, very manly. Jesus, you might end up being the stalker this time.Â
His lips curl up like he knows what youâre thinking about. You clear your throat, shifting your backpack higher up your arm. âYou planning on taking me home on that?â You ask, pointing at his bike.Â
He straightens up and shrugs. âGot a problem with the bike?â
You grin, âNot really,â but your dad will. âNo, not at all.â
You walk towards him and he reaches out, grabbing your backpack straps and tugging you towards him. You stumble, hands bracing against his chest so you donât land flat on your face. âSorry, kid,â but he doesnât sound sorry at all. He buckles the straps of your backpack together and tightens them, puffing smoke in your face while he does. âDonât want this flying off.â
âMhm,â you hum. Youâre not paying attention at all. The only thing you care about right now is just how ripped he is under your hands. Youâre not sure how long you gawk at him but he seems to be ridiculously amused by it.Â
âReady to go home, or what?â You jump back from him, brushing your hands off on your leggings and clearing your throat.Â
âYes, yeah.â You rip your eyes off his body and instead focus on the bike. âNo helmets?â You ask.
âYou heal, donât you?â You nod and he shrugs. âDonât need them then, do we?â
You canât help the giddy grin on your face at that. Itâs gotten tiring being treated like glass. Youâre about to get on the bike when you finally process what he said. âWait, how do you know I heal?â
He doesnât respond verbally. Instead, his gaze darts down to his fists. Your eyes widen when you see the metal poking through the skin. Of course, your father would only tell another mutant about his abomination of a daughter. You scoff and roll your eyes. Heâs such a fucking hypocrite.Â
Logan climbs on the bike and you follow after him. You're hesitant to wrap your arms around his waist but he just reaches behind himself and jerks you forward.Â
You suck in a sharp breath, pelvis tight against his ass while he squeezes your hands. âYou want to go flying?â You shake your head and he chuckles, starting the bike and driving off without another word.Â
Part of you loves the ride home, the other part detests it. For once you get to experience a little freedom. Youâre not trapped in a steel box staring at the back of a car seat while the man beside you pretends he doesnât exist.Â
You can feel the wind in your hair, get a taste of real speed, and enjoy a moment uninterrupted by someoneâs expectations of you. On the other hand, Logan does not respect speeding laws. And healing abilities or not, you donât actually want to experience road rash.Â
He manages to get you home in one piece, parking the motorcycle in the driveway and waiting for you to get off. But you canât, your thighs have been clenching the seat so tight you think they might need to scrape you off.Â
âKid?â He mutters. You shake your head against his back, arms still strangling his waist. It was actually kind of fucking terrifying being on one of these things. You canât tell if you loved or hated it.Â
He lets out a rough sigh, forcibly moving your arms and then tugging you off the seat. Your legs are like jello while you try and straighten out. âWasnât so bad, was it?â He asks. You canât manage much more than a strangled hum and he laughs.Â
You turn to your front door and spot a leering face peering out the window. âShit,â you huff. Your stepmother sees you spot her and disappears from view. You feel your hopes of ever getting back on that bike go with her.Â
âYou took her home on your bike!â
âWell-â
You flinch at the volume of your fatherâs voice. âI donât give a fuck what your excuse is! I will not have my daughter seen riding that monstrosity! You are not to do this again, do you understand me?â
You donât know what Logan says, but youâre certain itâs not the submissive Yes, sir your father is looking for. He continues shouting at him for another ten minutes. When you hear the door to his office open you scramble to look like you hadnât been listening in.Â
But youâre a bad actress and if his huff of laughter is anything to go by, Logan knows what you were doing. âDid you know that was going to happen?â He asks, pointing back to your fatherâs, now closed, study.Â
You nod, pursing your lips with an apologetic smile. âIf it helps, I was really hoping he wouldnât do that.â
He shrugs, âI donât really give a fuck how much he wants to scream at me.â Itâs refreshing, to finally have someone in the house who doesnât kiss your fatherâs ass. It makes you smile, a real genuine smile for the first time in a while.Â
You stand from the chair youâd been sitting in, gesturing further into your home. âAre you hungry? I havenât eaten all day so I was thinking about making something.â
The smirk drops from his face, expression suddenly serious. It makes you tense up. âLook, I appreciate the offer, but Iâm here to get paid. I donât want to be your friend, kid.â
You suck in a sharp breath, trying not to let the rejection sting. Heâs a professional, it should be a relief after the last one. âRight, yeah, Iâm sorry I didnât mean it like that.â
He nods, âRight,â tone stiff. You stare at him for another awkwardly long moment before you finally turn on your heel and walk toward the kitchen. You rush there, speedwalking so you donât have to look at him any longer.Â
You open up your fridge, keeping your back to him for as long as humanly possible. You can hear him take a seat at the island, can feel the way his eyes bore into you. Itâs a physical thing, his gaze, makes chills scrape their way down your spine.Â
You make yourself a sandwich and finally force yourself to turn around. Like youâd expected, heâs already looking at you. Lips ticking up just slightly when you finally get the courage to look up at him.Â
Logan feels a little guilty. You werenât coming onto him earlier, you were being genuine with your kindness. He knows there were no ulterior motives to it and thereâs a very slight part of him that feels bad for making you so quiet. âWhyâs your dad so pissy about the bike?â
Youâre a little startled by the question, after the comment he made youâd thought he wouldnât want anything to do with you. You swallow down the rest of your bite and cough a little when the bread gets stuck on the roof of your mouth.Â
âHe doesnât want me to crash.â
âBut you heal,â he points out bluntly and you canât help but laugh a little.Â
âYeah, thatâs the problem. He doesnât want me to crash and for someone to see that I miraculously healed. Having a freak for a daughter wouldnât exactly help his campaign, would it?â You canât even attempt to hide the bitterness in your voice. And you know Logan picks up on it because he doesnât ask any more questions.Â
Your gaze drops to your plate and you finish the rest of your meal in silence. Or, you try to. âGot any plans tonight?â
You chuckle and give him an odd look. âNo,â you respond sardonically. âNone at all, prepare yourself for a very boring job. I donât even know why he hired you, I never leave the house unless it's for school.â
âYeah?â he muses, but he doesnât seem particularly interested. More like heâs talking just to pass the time. âI heard youâve been having a hard time at school.â
You suck in a sharp breath, a sudden wave of anger roiling through your gut. The cabinets behind you begin to shake and you wince in embarrassment, tamping down on your powers before you accidentally blow up the kitchen.Â
Logan watches the moment with subdued interest like heâs not all that surprised or impressed with the display. âUnless they were a PoliSci nerd, I was a nobody up until last year.â Thereâs no concealing the hate lurking within your words, âAnd then my dad took up this whole anti-mutant regime. Well, you can imagine how much the activists love me. Iâve just had a few incidents with some particularly passionate protestors.â
âDo you believe in it?â
Your eyes widen in surprise, you hadnât expected him to actually continue the conversation. âWhat do you mean?â
He leans back, arms crossed across his chest in a way that makes his biceps bulge. He shrugs, âThe anti-mutant regime, do you agree with it?â
You open your mouth, the perfected script almost rolling off your tongue. But this isnât some politician's son youâre wooing. Youâre not the perfect daughter, youâre in your own home, finally talking to someone else like you.Â
âNo.â You answer, voice strong in its conviction. âAnd every time I see one of his PAs running around with their little signs I want to ram the stick up their ass.â
He barks out a laugh, eyes crinkling up in amusement. âI think we might get along, kid.â
You try to ignore the way your cheeks warm at his words. You donât want to be this affected by him, youâve barely spoken to him. But this is the first person in a long time that you know with absolute certainty you can be honest with. He doesnât care about protecting your political image or bowing to your fatherâs every whim.Â
Itâs a relief, like a constricting weight being taken off your chest. You give him an easy smile and get up to wash your dishes. His eyes are on you again but they feel less oppressive this time. Youâve already forgotten the rule heâs set in place, youâre not supposed to be friends.Â
Itâs going to be hard to remember that.Â
Your father tightens his grip around your waist until you feel like you might squeal. âSmile, now.â You raise your hand, taking the stairs up the stage and waving out at the crowd thatâs formed. Itâs hot today, your makeup would be melting off if it werenât for the artists who put it on for you.Â
Always have to look good in front of the camera. All of you. Seeing Logan in a suit was certainly a surprise. Youâre almost completely sure that your father had to give him a bonus to even consider wearing it today.Â
He looks good, but you honestly prefer him in the normal beater and leather jacket. Itâs something so uniquely him. This is just a reminder of your reality, that nothing around you is real. Itâs all pretty lies wrapped up in expensive clothes.Â
You have to bite your tongue and hold back a grimace when your father begins his speech. âFirst, we had to let them into our jobs. Now theyâre in our schools! Our children arenât safe, not when theyâve got loaded weapons sitting beside them! Because thatâs exactly what they are, weapons of mass destruction that will take apart-â
âFuck me,â you hiss under your breath. Your cheeks hurt from keeping this smile on your face. Youâre struggling not to flinch every time the crowd surges up to agree with him, bigoted shouts making your ears bleed.Â
Loganâs brows raise and he gives you a brief glance over his shoulder. Your face pinches in confusion only for a moment before you quickly correct it. Still, you keep your lips nearly completely motionless as you whisper, âCan you hear me?â
You dart your gaze back down to him and catch the barest of nods. Your smile softens, becoming something real if only for a moment. You donât say anything else, you donât need to. Itâs just a comfort to know someone else is there with you, seeing through the painted faces and plastic smiles.Â
Thereâs movement in the crowd. It cuts your father off midsentence. He peers over the podium, trying to get a better look at whatâs happening. You hear someone scream and then the entire crowd is getting knocked to the ground.Â
You jump back in shock, everyone on stage still. The security, however, is rushing to get to you and your family. Itâs too late, though, thereâs a mutant in the crowd and his eyes are set on you. âFuck you,â he screams out your father's name and lugs something at the stage.Â
You hear someone shout your name but itâs too late. Glass shatters against the side of your face. It takes less than a second for the pain to start. You can feel holes being burned through your skin, like living fire melting through your bones and gums. A scream rips out of your throat, your hands coming up to block your face too late.Â
âGet her out of here!â
As agonizing as it is, you can already feel your skin working to mend itself. You can practically hear the flesh bonding back together. But the acid is dripping down you. It keeps moving steadily through your clothes and skin, your abilities on overdrive trying to repair the damage.Â
You canât focus on anything except the sensation of being burned alive. Suddenly, thereâs an arm being thrown around your shoulder and youâre being lifted off your feet. Your skin scrapes against the rough material of someoneâs blazer and it makes you grit your teeth and scream again.Â
âI know, hold on kid, itâll be over in a minute.â Logan rushes you behind the stage, where there are no cameras to watch you heal. You donât know how your fatherâs PR team is going to spin this. Everyone saw it, saw the way your flesh bubbled and boiled. Thereâs no hiding the fact that half your face should be melted off.Â
âCar,â you grunt out when he puts you on your feet again.Â
His hands are clamped firmly around your shoulders, inspecting you for any further damage. âWhat?â
âWe gotta get to the car,â the words are a struggle to get out. Your lungs constrict painfully in your chest while you force the rest out. âCanât let them see.â
He looks pissed off that that's what you're worried about and not the fact that you were just attacked. Finally, after a minute of just staring at you, he nods. He wraps an arm around your shoulder and runs with you back to the limo. He throws the door open, pushing you inside and sliding in beside you.Â
You take in a deep breath the second youâre no longer in view of the TV cameras. âFuck,â you gasp out. Your dress is in tatters on your left side and you quickly cover your chest. You pray that you didnât accidentally flash anything while you were still on stage. Your father would never forgive you for that.Â
Itâs silent in the car for a moment. You feel something being draped over your shoulder and look over to see Logan passing you his jacket. When he catches your gaze he gently grabs your jaw and titls your face towards his.Â
His eyes rove over the left side of your face and he gives you a tight smile. âYouâre fine, kid.â
You pull your chin out of his grip and pull his jacket closed around you. âSee why my father wanted you around? How would he have ever explained his daughter surviving an acid attack?â
Thereâs something pinched in his gaze. A deep-seated irritation and something else youâre too tired to identify. Heâs looking at you oddly and you wish he wouldnât. You press your forehead to the cool glass of the window and slump against the car door.Â
You donât know when you fall asleep but by the time you wake up, Loganâs already carrying you up to your room. He sees you shift awake and places you on your feet. You steady yourself against the stair banister and walk the rest of the way to your room, trying to shake off the pain of the day.Â
You look back just in time to see Logan at the front door. âGoodnight,â you call down to him. You know he can hear you, but he walks through the door without another word. You bite your lip, ignoring the sinking feeling of your gut.Â
You toss your destroyed dress to the floor and turn your TV on. You surf through the channels for a bit before finding a clip of todayâs incident. â-apparently part of a protest for mutants against the government. I donât know Bill, they seem to just be proving everybodyâs point. They are unsafe.â
âI agree, my thoughts and prayers go out toâŠâ
You roll your eyes as they say your name. Theyâre saying it wasnât acid, instead itâs some sort of chemical compound that causes extreme pain. Even you donât believe that bullshit. You have a feeling your father is going to be looking for a new PR team tomorrow.Â
Your attention is snagged by the replay of the accident. You donât focus on the acid, you donât want to. Instead, you see how quickly Logan rushed to your side. He seemed to be right there even as the acid was being thrown.Â
Your brows pinch together and you glance at the jacket beside you. Heâd forgotten to take it back before he left. You pick it up, eyes skating over the fabric before you find what youâre looking for. Thereâs a large hole in the right sleeve, acid having burned through it.Â
You hadnât even realized he was in pain. You know he can heal, but it doesnât get rid of the fluttering feeling in your stomach. Youâve never had someone look after you like that.Â
You grin to yourself, tucking the jacket in the back of your closet. Youâre sure he wouldnât want it back and youâre not planning on parting with it anytime soon.Â
Youâre on house arrest for a week after the acid incident. Which includes no school. Your father has to play into the idea that youâre recovering from the trauma and healing. You donât know how much longer heâs planning on keeping you locked up but youâre going stir crazy.Â
Not only do you not get to go to classes, but Logan isnât around either. He doesnât need to be, not when the only place youâre in is your room. Heâs not a friend, heâs made that clear, but heâs something. And you are desperately craving that specific something.Â
âIt was a sickening attack against my daughter that my wife and I are still trying to recover from.â You roll your eyes as you listen to your father spew his bullshit to the interviewer in the next room.Â
Youâre not allowed to be out and about, of course. You canât risk someone seeing you. But that doesnât stop you from lurking.Â
âIt was an incredibly traumatic experience for her, Iâm sure.â You grin to yourself, picking at your nails. You like this one, whoever the reporter is interviewing him. She hasnât let him catch a break. Especially not when he tries to capitalize on your trauma. Even though he hasnât checked in once with you.Â
âWell,â he splutters for a moment. âYes, of course,â he tries to sound humble but anyone can tell heâs just covering his ass. âAnd it just further proves what Iâve always said about mutants. They are animals, theyâre not like us.â
Youâd think at a certain point youâd go numb to it. Youâve been raised hearing this rhetoric from him all your life. But the sting never eases. That cloying ache in your chest never quite leaves you. Not when you know the only reason he publicly accepts you is for political gains. So everyone can see what a wonderful father he is and vote for him.
You feel sick to your stomach and you donât think you can listen to much more of this. But right as youâre about to tap out a hand clamps down on your shoulder. You nearly scream but you catch a whiff of the manâs aftershave and your mouth snaps shut.Â
You leap out of your chair and whip around, a grin plastered on your face. âLogan, what are you doing here?â You canât disguise the giddiness in your voice. He might constantly be reminding you that you hold nothing more than a professional relationship, but you donât give a shit. Heâs a constant in your life and thatâs rare for you, so youâll latch onto whatever comfort you can find.Â
His gaze briefly darts to the connecting wall to your fatherâs study and you flush. Heâd probably heard all of that. Youâve never had someone see the side of your father that you do. Thereâs something shamefully embarrassing about it.Â
He looks back at you and gives you a sly smirk. âWanna get out of here?â Youâd have to be an idiot to say no.
âUh,â you can hear the music from where you stand across the street. You shuffle uncertainly on your feet beside Logan, glancing up and down the sidewalk like your fatherâs going to pop out of an alleyway. âI donât know if this is such a good idea.â
Logan tugs his cigar out of his mouth. Heâs leaned up against a lamppost and heâs watched you struggle for the past ten minutes. âLive a little kid, would ya?â
You look back at the dingy bar and grimace. âOkay, thereâs a difference between living a little and having my face blasted on the news. Howâs it going to look if Iâm photographed at a bar while Iâm meant to be healing?â
Logan points with his cigar to the entrance of the bar. âI can promise you, no one in there gives a fuck about who your daddy is.â Comforting, and a little humbling.Â
You take in a deep breath and Logan must sense the change in your demeanor. He flicks the cigar to the ground, crushing it with the heel of his boot. He holds his arm out, âReady, kid?â
You nod, hurrying to his side and slipping under his grasp. He lets his arm hang heavily around your shoulder, hand squeezing your bicep gently to try and quell your nerves. Youâd be swooning at the touch if you werenât about to throw up from anxiety.Â
You used to have a life. Until your father had blown it up. You havenât been around this many people in ages. Well, you havenât been around people who are just having fun and not sucking up to every politicianâs kid they meet.Â
The music gets louder as you step over through the threshold of the bar. The soles of your shoes stick to the floor. People laugh loudly all around you, some of them shouting up at TV screens for whatever sport is currently playing. Youâre sure half of them donât even normally watch the game. They just need an excuse to get their wives off their backs.Â
The thought brings a small smile to your lips. Logan glances down at you and frowns, âYou are old enough to drink, arenât you?â
You roll your eyes and move out from under his hold. âYes, Logan. Iâm going into a masterâs program, my frontal lobe is fully formed.â
He huffs a little at the attitude, cheeks twitching with a suppressed smile. He nods towards the back of the bar, âFind a seat, Iâll get us drinks.â He walks towards the bar without another word and you resent him a little for it.Â
Without him beside you, itâs like everything comes crashing down all at once. The songs playing grate on your ears. Every laugh feels like theyâre screaming in your face. Youâve never been more in tune with your sense of smell and you hate it.Â
Your hands tremble by your sides and you nearly miss the man in front of you spilling his beer down his shirt. It looks completely unnatural, the way it just flips out of his hand. And you know itâs your doing.Â
You shove through him and his friends, running to the back and sliding into the first booth you see. You dig your nails into your palms, taking a few deep breaths to try and calm your heart rate down a bit.Â
Logan slides into the seat across from you, placing a beer in front of you. Itâs barely touched the grimy wood of the table before you tip your head back and drain it. Youâve never been a particular fan of beer or any alcohol for that matter.Â
But right now you need a buzz before you accidentally level the whole bar. You slam the bottle back on the table, taking in a deep breath, and sitting back. Logan gives you a hard stare, glancing between you and the empty bottle.Â
He clicks his tongue and stands up, âIâll go get another one.â
You bite your lip and give him a sheepish, âThank you.â
It doesnât take long for the buzz to settle in. Thereâs a slight tingling in your legs and the tips of your fingers. It almost feels like how you get when youâre starting to get aroused. But you donât know if thatâs from the alcohol or the way Logan looks in his slutty little t-shirt.Â
Definitely tipsy, you think to yourself, nudging your third beer to the side.Â
âAlways been a lightweight?â He teases, watching you with amusement in his gaze while he works on what must be his fifth whiskey.Â
You shake your head with a soft smile. âNo, I used to go out with my friends all the time.â You laugh a little at the memories and lean in a little closer like youâre sharing some horrible secret. Logan rolls his eyes but acquiesces, leaning in to listen to you speak. âWe made up alter egos for our drunk selves. Wanna know mine?â You ask, wiggling your eyebrows at him with a stupid grin.
His brows pinch together and he frowns, âI donât think so.â
You laugh and lean back in your seat. âYouâre the worst!â He places his glass down on the table and fixes you with an odd look. You shift around uncomfortably, âWhat is it?â
âWhat happened to your friends? Why are you hanging out with me and not them?â
âOh,â your gaze drops to the table and you suddenly find the stains on it very interesting. Itâs practically abstract art. You swallow harshly around the lump in your throat and shrug. âUm, just all the stuff with my dad happened, and,â you shrug, âI donât know. My life kind of fell apart.â
You try and shake off the funk, bring back the happy-go-lucky feeling you were in only minutes ago. âI had to move out of the dorms and head back home. My friends stopped talking to me. My boyfriend dumped me. It all just kind of blew up.â
Logan frowns and you swear he seems angry on your behalf. Itâs a nice feeling, having someone care enough to hold a grudge for you. âYou ever tell him how it was all affecting you?â
You snort, âOf course I did. He was overjoyed. He never liked my friends, especially not my boyfriend, they encouraged me to be too independent. He thought I was losing the values he raised me with. He just never cared to learn that I never agreed with them in the first place.â
Logan doesnât say anything for a while and you let your gaze drift to the karaoke stage. Two women are singing a bad redemption of Led Zeppelin and it makes you smile. You donât see the way Loganâs eyes linger on the curve of your lips and then drop to your chest.Â
You never seem to notice how you make him squirm. There is something so interesting about you. Something so different from the families he worked with before. He doesnât know if it's the whole mutant thing, if you two are somehow kindred spirits in that regard. He doubts it, heâs never really cared much about that.Â
But he knows that there is something magnetic about you. It draws him in and makes him hate his own rules. He promised not to get involved with another client. It always ends messy, most times bloody.Â
You turn back to him and smile. Your voice is a low purr as you ask, âYou wanna get out of here?â
Of course, heâs never been one to follow the rules.Â
âI am so sorry about this. Really.âÂ
Logan glares down at you while you straighten out his tie. You duck your head so you donât have to meet his gaze and he lets out a long-suffering sigh.Â
âForget it, kid.â He says it with a smirk but it doesnât make you feel any less guilty.Â
This will be your first public appearance since the incident. Itâs a gala, of course, because your father hates you. Heâd demanded you find a date, someone to look pretty on your arm because he doesnât want you talking while youâre there. Youâre meant for pictures and nothing more.Â
Considering the fact that no one wants to talk to you on campus, the acid incident not helping at all, you had no luck finding a date. Youâd had to beg on hands and knees for days to get Logan to agree.Â
You donât know what it is that finally made him cave but youâre grateful for it. You think your father was expecting you to fail. To come crawling to him and be forced to go with who he wanted you to go with.Â
You were not going to spend the whole night listening to some political major try and explain your own fatherâs campaign to you. Youâd rather swallow acid than go through that for another night. Your father, of course, doesnât know that Logan is taking you.Â
Youâre planning on ambushing him with it. He canât do anything about it now. He wants you to have a date for some reason and thereâs no way for him to find a backup now. You take a step back from him and turn to look in the mirror.Â
Side by side, you do make an incredibly attractive couple. He looks amazing in his suit, his muscles just slightly pushing against the fabric. And as much as he hates the tie and constricting material, he makes it work.Â
And you feel pretty for the first time in a long time. You actually got to do your own hair and makeup for once. Youâre a lot less heavy-handed than the assistants your father hires. You feel comfortable in your own skin, finally, wearing the deep red dress your stepmother had gotten for you.Â
âWe look good,â you muse.Â
Logan looks down at you and smiles slightly, âYou do.â
You give him a confused grin, âI said we.â
He leans down, lips brushing against the shell of your ear as he whispers, âI know what you said, sweetheart.â Your heart nearly beats out of your chest at the proximity. Gooseflesh raises on your arms where heâs touching you and your knee buckles ever so slightly.Â
You can perfectly imagine his husky voice whispering something much, much dirtier to you. He pulls back with a slight chuckle and forcefully turns you around. âCome on, kid, weâre gonna be late.â
He nudges you towards your bedroom door and you nod your head mutely. He keeps doing that to you. These little things that could be so easily dismissed as you reading into his actions. But you know, deep down, youâre not reading into anything.Â
But you donât know what to do with this information that he might possibly be into you. Or at the very least, attracted to you. He made it clear early on that he wants nothing but professionalism between the two of you, yet he continually breaks his own rule.Â
Your father and stepmother are waiting at the bottom of the stairs for you both. Your stepmother smiles when she sees you but your fatherâs face screws up in anger. âAre you fucking kidding me? The goddamn bodyguard?â
You shrug and slip past him, already walking to the front door. âA dateâs a date.â You pause and grin over at him, âWhat are you going to do about it?â Itâs a taunt, one you donât give him a chance to respond to.Â
Youâre already slipping outside and heading to the town car. Something about Logan being with you emboldens you to act in ways you never would. Even when heâs not there, when youâre just having family dinner and your father says something off-putting. You fight back, you donât let him steamroll you and your opinions.Â
You feel better than you have in ages with Logan beside you. Still, the ride there is incredibly awkward.Â
The hotel is grand and luxurious. But they all are. You feel guilty complaining about your life when this is your weekend. What do you have to be upset about when you regularly stay in five-star motels and wear designer dresses without glancing at the price tag?
Sometimes you feel guilty around Logan. You wonder if he ever resents you for your privilege. You might be a mutant like him, sure, but youâve never had to struggle to make ends meet. Or try and scrap together enough money to get your next meal. Youâve never had to worry about where youâre going to sleep next or if youâll have a roof over your head.Â
Your struggles have been so different that you worry if something ever did happen between the two of you, you might not work together.Â
But those are spiraling thoughts for another time. Right now, youâre just trying to get through the front door without someone bombarding your father with questions on his stance about whatever.Â
When itâs clear that heâs going to be there for a while, he sends you and Logan off to the ballroom on your own. You feel bad for your stepmother, having to stay behind and pretend sheâs interested as they bore her with stories that have no real meaning.Â
âPoor woman,â you mutter, watching her struggle to keep the smile on her face.Â
âYou donât call her mom,â Logan muses. You turn to look at him and he just shrugs. âJust a little weird.â
âWell, sheâs not my mom.â His head tilts in confusion and you elaborate. âMy bio mom left the second she figured out she gave birth to a mutant. We lie to the public, stepmomâs interfere with the perfect nuclear family ideal my dadâs pushing for.â
âIf he cares so much about family then why donât you have your dadâs last name?â A good question, one you had to field a lot when you first started school.Â
You give him a sly grin, âTook my mom's maiden name the second I was eighteen, just to piss him off.â Thereâs no true reason behind it other than being vindictive and petty. âHeâs been trying to get me to change it for years but he canât force me to. Besides, I like having my name separate from theirs. Lets me pretend Iâm not a part of the family. Donât get me wrong, sheâs nice and all, we just never really had the chance to bond.â
Someone passes by you. A couple you know youâre supposed to recognize but you canât place their names. The man calls out your name, coming toward you with his arms open wide. You can see Logan tense up slightly beside you, bodyguard instincts coming out for a moment.Â
You squeeze his hand briefly before stepping forward to hug the man. âSo nice to see you, again.â You tell him. He grins and squeezes you a little closer to his chest than necessary.Â
Logan clears his throat, glaring at the manâs drifting hands. Before either of you can react, Logan is pulling you back, hand resting lightly over the small of your back. He holds his hand out, forcing the man to shake his hand and take his attention off of you.
You canât hold back the smile on your lips when you see how much smaller the man is under Loganâs intense stare. Youâve gotten used to the men at these events treating you however they want. They donât see you as a human, you are your fatherâs accessory and their toy. You envy Logan for how easily he can dismiss these men, take away their larger-than-life personalities, and reduce them to the sniveling rats they truly are.Â
He doesnât even speak, simply tugs you towards the ballroom and away from the manâs wandering hands. You canât help the stupid smile on your face while you look at him. He glances out the side of his eye and huffs, âWhat?â He snaps, tone impatient.Â
You shrug and shake your head. âNothing, youâre justâŠâ You trail off, unsure how to continue. You donât want to make him uncomfortable by telling him how you really feel about him. How deeply you appreciate him, how horribly you desire him. Youâre afraid it will all just blow up in your face. That youâll have truly been reading into everything and gotten his intentions all wrong. After all, heâs made it abundantly clear that thereâs meant to be nothing between the two of you except a paycheck.Â
You take in a deep breath, smile faltering, âNothing.â You finally spit out, slipping out of his grasp and walking quicker towards the doors. His hand lingers on your back, fingers trailing slowly down your spine until youâre completely out of his reach.Â
The chatter inside gets louder the closer you get to the entrance. You listen to the indiscernible voices, the quartet playing in the corner, and the clink of metal on the glass as they all eat. You straighten out your shoulders and put on your best smile, mentally preparing yourself to keep it stiff on your cheeks for the rest of the night.Â
Logan catches up to you, the both of you stopping the second you see the inside of the ballroom.Â
People Against Mutants
Evolution or Monstrosities
Parents for the Removal of Mutant Children
Your eyes widen as you take in the banners and signs hanging off the walls. More and more uncreative rhetoric all for the annihilation of mutants. Of people like you and Logan. Your smile drops immediately and you know you should have expected something like this from your father. Heâd been refusing to tell you what this gala was for, saying offhandly he was just raising some money.Â
You thought it was another charity. Not this. Not people, quite literally, calling for your head. For Loganâs head. You suck in a sharp breath and glance towards the silent man beside you. His jaw is clenched as he takes in all the finely dressed people around you. Theyâre all laughing and chatting like theyâre not actively campaigning for the destruction of children.Â
âBar?â You ask, already walking towards it.Â
âSounds good to me.â His hand is on your back again and youâre grateful for it. The glower on his face, the attitude that screams I donât belong here keeps people away from you. He shoulders through the men huddling around the bar, forcefully clearing space for the two of you.Â
And when they turn around, posturing like theyâre going to say something, he only has to look at them for them to retreat with their tails tucked. Itâs ridiculously attractive seeing someone command these men so easily.Â
âWhiskey,â Logan grumbles, he looks back at you and you slide beside him, leaning your elbows against the cool counter.Â
âJust champagne, please,â you tell the bartender. He nods, quickly making your drinks and handing them to you. You turn with the flute in your hand, surveying the room. It feels less like a gala and more like a production of false niceties that will never end and never be genuine.Â
âDonât know how you deal with these fuckers all the time,â Logan mutters, glaring as a man slams into him and keeps walking without apologizing.Â
You let out a short huff of laughter, âHonestly,â he glances over at you and you shrug. âIâve got no fucking clue either.â He scoffs and takes a swig from his glass. But you canât take your eyes off of him. You feel the words on the tip of your tongue, weighing you down until you feel like you have no choice but to spit them out.Â
âYou,â his brows quirk up and he glances over at you. You take in a deep breath and start over, nerves making your palms sweaty around the glass. âYou make it bearable.â
Loganâs face falls and he sucks in a deep breath. You see the expression on his face, you know what heâs going to tell you. And you hate how apologetic he looks. You especially despise the way heâs making you feel pitied. Heâs never done that before and you donât want him to start now.Â
âDonât,â you tell him before he can say anything. You let out a self-deprecating laugh and place the champagne flute on the bar so you donât have to look at him. âI know what youâre going to say, alright. So, just, donât.â
Logan purses his lips and grabs your jaw. You try and jerk your face out of his grasp but he doesnât let you, he forces you to look at him. He only lets go once you reluctantly make eye contact. Youâre surprised by the look on his face. Thereâs no pity in his gaze like youâd expected.Â
This is something else, something darker and more twisted. You canât put your finger on what exactly youâre seeing but you know it makes your heart race and your thighs clench. âListen, sweetheart, I-â
âWhat the hell are you doing?â You jump away from him but Logan just clenches his eyes shut with a short huff of irritated breath. You clear your throat and turn to face your father. Heâs glaring between you and Logan, but smiles warmly anytime someone looks your way. âI didnât bring you here so my contributors could see what a fucking whore you are for the help.â
âDad!â You exclaim, eyes widening in horror. But Logan doesnât seem bothered by your fatherâs words. If anything it seems to incense him, his hand drifting from your jaw to drape itself over the nape of your neck. You try not to show just how much the possessive grip is affecting you but you know they can both tell.Â
Your fatherâs face pinches and he nearly stomps his foot as he looks between you and Logan. He looks like he wants to say something else but your stepmother, thankfully, calls his name. She waves him over towards her and you hold your breath, waiting to see what heâs going to do.Â
He takes in short puffs of air, straightening out his suit jacket and glaring at you. âYouâre not going to be a fucking wallflower all night, got it?â He doesnât give you a chance to respond before heâs stomping off. He calls out a warm greeting to someone across the room and you feel like you can finally breathe again.Â
You give Logan a tired smile and nod towards the rest of the party. âTime to mingle.â
He laughs, loudly, enough to make peopleâs heads turn. You can feel your skin heating up from embarrassment and flinch away from the sound. âSorry, kid, mingling ainât part of my contract.â
Your jaw drops as you glare at him. âAre you serious?â
He turns back to the bar, flagging down the bartender for a refill. âDeadly,â he tells you firmly, barely looking at you. You roll your eyes and walk away from him, glaring at his back the whole time you do so.Â
He thought coming to one of these things, being stuffed in a scratchy suit, would be his worst nightmare. He was proven wrong when he heard them talking to each other. Bitching about golf and their mistresses wanting more attention. Their kids nagging them and their wives being bitches.Â
All of it made him want to down a whole bottle of whiskey and then blow his brains out. His worst nightmare turned into ever having to hold a conversation with one of these pricks.Â
Then, he turns around, surveying the room for wherever you were lurking. He expects you to be by your fatherâs side or hiding somewhere in a corner. Instead, youâre standing close -extremely close - to some pretty boy.Â
His hand is on your waist and youâre laughing at whatever boring fucking story heâs telling you. Logan tries to pick up on your conversation but there are too many things happening at once already. His senses are on overdrive and heâs already struggling against a migraine.Â
He feels something brewing in his gut, something heâs been trying to just shove down for months. He doesnât know what it is he hates about this picture but it makes him sick to his stomach. He hears something crack and looks down to find the glass of whiskey split on one side.Â
âShit,â he hisses, slamming the glass on the bar behind him. He shakes his hand out and tries to unclench his fists but itâs hard. He couldnât have possibly been standing here long enough for you to suddenly find the love of your life. Why the fuck are the two of you so close?
This was so unlike you. Rarely did you ever have something good to say about the men you would encounter at these things. Heâd heard you bitch about it enough times. Something about this isnât adding up and he doesnât know if itâs his own jealousy or intuition.Â
Still, he finds himself pushing away from the bar and stalking towards you both. Closer, he can finally see what the problem is. Your hands are on the guy's chest but you arenât leaning against him, youâre actively trying to push him away.Â
It makes Loganâs blood boil, jaw clenching as he tries to keep himself at bay. He didnât want to cave some kidâs head in in the middle of the gala. But the closer he got the clearer he could hear your hissed warnings to take his hands off of you.Â
Logan finally reaches you and the look of sheer relief on your face makes him want to bring the claws out. Heâd love to see that smug smirk ripped off his face, but he holds back. If only so he doesnât traumatize you.Â
âAlright, bub, hands off,â he warns.Â
âWhy donât you just leave us alone?â He had to give it to the kid, heâs got balls. Rarely did anyone ever buck up to him like this. Normally, he might entertain him a bit, drag this on longer than necessary to get a kick out of it.Â
But he still hasnât taken his hands off of you and Loganâs not interested in fucking around tonight. Without a word, he grabs the kid by the collar of his jacket and tosses him away from you.Â
He lands roughly on the floor with a loud gasp and people turn to look. Logan pays no mind to the onlookers. He places his hand on your back and leads you out of the ballroom, unwilling to have eyes on you for the rest of this conversation.Â
âLogan,â you start, tone nervous.Â
âDonât,â he snaps. He regrets it immediately from the way you jump in surprise. He lets out a rough sigh, running his hand down his face, and walks through the first door he finds. âIâm sorry, kid, I just-â
âLogan,â you cut him off. The tone of your voice is enough to get him to finally look at you. Your arms are crossed and youâre glaring at him. âWhy the fuck did you drag us into a closet?â
His brows furrow in confusion and he glances around, finally realizing what he walked into, âFuck,â he hisses. He gropes blindly around the room for a light switch. Thereâs a small click and then an unflattering fluorescent light is shining down on you both. Heâs managed to drag you both into a small, incredibly cramped, cleaning closet. Â
Youâre grimacing as you push a few mops away from your head. You look over at him and something about the look on his face must be funny because you start to laugh. âWhat were you thinking?â
Your smile makes one curl up on his own lips. He canât help it, something about you eases a bit of the tightness constantly lurking inside him. âThought it was one of those stuffy conference rooms.â
You scoff and reach for the handle, âJust a stuffy closest, good going, Logan.â You roll your eyes and tug on the knob. Your brows furrow together as you jiggle the handle every which way, desperately pulling on it.Â
âMove over,â Logan mutters, nudging you to the side. He wraps his hand around the handle and yanks on it, expecting the door to swing open. When it doesnât his face falls.Â
âDid you miraculously unlock it, genius?â You demand sarcastically. Logan feels his shoulders tense up, frustration levels steadily rising. Heâs already got a shit temper, he doesnât need you adding to this.Â
âNo,â he snipes, âbut I donât see you coming up with any wonderful solutions.â
You throw your hands up in the air, wincing when your elbow collides with the shelving unit behind you. âI didnât drag us into this mess! Why did you even come in here?â You demand and he can see how angry you are.Â
It shows in the way you tapped your heeled feet against the floor and glower at him like heâs the bane of your existence. He doesnât know what happens, what comes over him, or why this is the moment he chooses to break his rule.Â
Your back slams into the shelves behind you and you gasp as he surges towards you. His hands come up to cup your cheeks and before you get a chance to question him, his mouth is covering your own. Logan buries his hand in your hair, ruining the perfectly styled curls. You donât seem to mind much if the way you arch into him is anything to go by.Â
His tongue runs across the seam of your lips, tasting the cherry-flavored gloss youâd applied earlier. He wants to devour you. Consume you body and soul, take everything you have to give, and then keep going. He doesnât want to stop, but heâs not sure he wants the first place you have sex to be in a janitorâs closet.Â
He pulls back, tugging you back when you try to chase his lips with your own. âShouldnât do this here,â he mutters. Heâs struggling to hold back. And when you look up at him, lips swollen from his kiss, and you mutter why, how is he meant to resist?
He tugs you away from the shelves, pushing you against the door so he doesnât have to see your face twist up in pain every time the corner digs into your lower back. Your hands drop down to his belt, lips desperately carving a path down his neck.Â
Heâd laugh at your eagerness if he wasnât just as desperate for you. He reaches for the hem of your dress but itâs one of those floor-length gowns with no slits. He struggled for a minute before getting too impatient and just muttering, âFuck it.â
You gasp when you feel the metal of his claw against your leg, eyes dropping down to watch as he makes himself a slit. He slices the fabric along your thigh and then just rips it. âLogan,â you hiss as he hikes the silk over your hips.Â
âSomething wrong, sweetheart?â You glare at him, eyes darting between him and his pants before you finally shake your head. He laughs slightly, hand drifting under your dress and reveling in the way you shiver under his touch. âYeah,â he whispers, âthatâs what I thought.â
His fingers move gently along your thighs, easing you into his touch. You let out breathy whimpers, tucking your face in his neck the closer he gets to your core. He lets his hand drift lower, searching out the band of your underwear.Â
Heâs pleasantly surprised when heâs met with nothing but you dripping for him. âShit, youâre not wearing any underwear?â
You freeze and keep your face stubbornly buried in his neck. Logan laughs slightly, tugging you back and forcing you to look up at him. You mumble something under your breath. Itâs said so quickly he can barely understand you. âWhat was that?â
âUgh, god, Logan.â You groan and let your eyes drop down to his shirt, fiddling with the end of his tie. âI was hoping this would happen.â
When he doesnât say anything your face shifts, worry gnawing away at you. You glance up at him and are surprised by the intensity of his gaze. Heâs staring down at you like he wants to eat you whole. His pupils have consumed all the color of his eyes, thereâs nothing but want on his face.Â
âYou wanna know why I agreed to come with you, kid?â
Your mind is completely dulled just by being this close to him. It takes you a moment to process what heâs saying before you nod your head. âWhy?â
The look on his face reminds you of a wolf guarding its territory. Itâs predatorial, animalistic, it makes you want him even more. âI didnât want any of these little boys getting a chance to have their hands on you.â His gaze drops down to your lips and he leans in until your breaths are mingling together.Â
âYou have no idea how long Iâve wanted you.â He dips his head down and his kiss isnât as intense as it was the first time. His lips move lazily over your own, tongue stroking against yours like heâs savoring the taste.Â
You can taste the whiskey heâd drank earlier, can still smell cigars on his breath. It should be revolting, youâve never liked kissing smokers. But there is something so intoxicating about him. Everything he does is enchanting to you.Â
Itâs a naive train of thought but you trust him wholly. He could do whatever he wanted to you and youâd let him willingly. His hands continue their exploration down your body and you canât help but arch into his touch. His fingers stroke languidly over your center and you moan into his mouth.Â
Your lips part with little gasps and your head thunks loudly against the door. Neither of you notice or care, youâve all but forgotten the gala outside. The government employees and rich socialites that youâre supposed to be entertaining.Â
And when he slips a finger inside you, you donât care who hears you call out his name. The rough pad of his finger creates a feeling youâve never been able to produce on your own. Thereâs something so exhilarating about this whole situation.Â
Stuck in this tiny closet, no air to breathe but each otherâs. No room for anything other than your bodies pressed as closely together as possible. You're completely surrounded by him and you never want to leave.Â
âLogan,â you gasp out his name and shove at his shoulders. He momentarily stops his ministrations, giving you a worried look. âPlease, I just want you.â You tug at his wrist, hissing when his fingers leave you with a lewd pop.Â
He looks hesitant, but you can see the way heâs straining against his boxers. You let your hand trail down his stomach, palming him through the thin fabric. His hips buck into your hands and he lets out the most attractive noise youâve ever heard. Youâve always liked guys who arenât afraid to be vocal.Â
âFuck, youâre gonna be the death of me,â he whispers. He swats your hands to the sides, tugging his boxers down and squeezing your hips hard enough to bruise. âCome on, up.â
You jump and he slings your legs around his waist, lining himself up with your entrance. He drags you slowly down his cock, resting your back against the door and giving a hesitant thrust inside you.Â
You canât help the low groan that leaves your parted lips. Itâs like youâre full of nothing but him. Youâd been mentally prepared for the stretch he would present, but you probably should have given him more time to warn you up.Â
You donât care though, this is all youâve been craving for months. To feel nothing, taste nothing but him. Youâve been praying that he feels the same way you do, and if the look on his face is anything to go by, he does.Â
He looks completely wrecked, head resting on your shoulder while you both take a breath. Itâs overwhelming, this feeling of finally having what youâve always wanted. Someone you can give yourself to completely and still feel safe with them.Â
You drag your hand up his back, burying it in his hair and reveling in how soft it is. You tug him back by the roots, tilting his neck until heâs forced to look at you. Your gaze drops to his reddened lips and you smile at the gloss youâve smeared across his chin.Â
âCome on, Logan, donât tell me youâre all talk.â
His eyes narrow but you can see the amusement swimming within them. âYouâre gonna regret that.â
âOh, yeah?â You goad, grinding your hips down against his and biting your lip hard enough to draw blood. Youâre trying not to make a noise, trying to make sure he doesnât see just how much heâs affecting you. But you can already feel your orgasm forming, itâs a low tingle in the tips of your toes, a burning hot desire rushing through your thighs as you clench around him.Â
âYeah,â he promises, thrusting sharply into you. This time the moan is forced out of you, your lips parting unbidden as you slump over him, burying your face in his neck. He doesnât waste any time, using your hips as handles to pump you over his cock like youâre nothing more than a toy.Â
The door rattles behind you, each thrust of his hips makes it shake in its frame. His hands fist the back of your dress, grip so tight you think it might tear. You donât care. He could rip it off of you and youâd walk outside naked right now.Â
You donât care what happens, not when heâs beside you. Thereâs a feeling of security that comes from being around Logan and you can feel it in this moment. You trust him to take care of you in every way.Â
Maybe you shouldnât. After all, you two havenât known each other long. But thereâs not much youâre worried about when heâs moving steadily inside you. You can taste the desperation you share for each other in each pump of his hips.Â
He whispers it into your ear while you claw at his back. The shelves around you shake and you worry you might bring them down if you canât rope yourself in. But you can feel the wave building in the back of your throat, your vision blurring as you tighten your legs around his waist and begin to match his rhythm.Â
âThere you go,â he mutters, pinning you to the door and keeping your hips still while he moves inside you. âCome on, I can feel you clenching around me, sweetheart.â He manages to hold you up with one hand, the other diving between your legs to rub tight circles around your bundle of nerves.Â
It doesnât take much longer for your muscles to seize up, back bowing as you clench desperately around him. âOh, fuck, Logan,â you shout his name, and his hand quickly comes up to smother your cries. He squeezes your cheeks until your eyes snap open and he drags you down to meet his gaze.Â
âDonât want to lose my job, need you to be quiet for me,â he grunts out, his tone breathy and strained. He loses his rhythm, movements speeding up erratically while he lets out low groans and whispers of your name. You almost cum again when he finally finishes inside you.Â
Your limbs are twitching in overstimulation by the time his hips still. You feel completely boneless, body slumped lazily in his arms. He wraps both arms around you, squeezing you a little before slowly lifting you off of him.Â
Itâs a relief of pressure when he pulls out. His cum leaks out of you, dribbling down your thighs and dripping onto the floor of the closest. Your face screws up at the feeling and you internally cringe. No condom was probably a stupid call.
But you donât really want to think about the repercussions right now. Not when heâs stroking your hair and rubbing a soothing hand down your back, waiting until you can form a coherent sentence before he lets you go. âAlright?â He asks, voice bordering on something smug.Â
âMhm,â you push away from him, legs shaky as you try and straighten out your dress. Itâs a loss cause, trying to hide what happened in here at all. Youâve got a tear going up to your hip and youâre pretty sure there are holes in the back. Loganâs tie is gone and you donât even remember taking that off. His shirt is completely wrinkled and your lip gloss has stained his face.Â
Youâve both got horrific sex hair and the room reeks of it. You donât know how you're going to sneak out of here. You still try and relax your hair, patting down the flyaways while Logan retucks his shirt.Â
Itâs silent between the two of you, heavy but not awkward. You donât think either of you knows what to say now that youâve physically acted on what you want. A sudden thought hits you, makes your heart clench painfully and your tongue ties up in your mouth.Â
Heâd confirmed that he wanted your body. That he desired you sexually. But you donât think he actually said anything about a real relationship. There would be problems, of course, your father for one would have a lot to say about it. But you donât care about that. You donât care about any of the consequences, you just want to be with him.Â
You open your mouth to ask him what he wants when the door swings open. Both you and Logan whip towards it. But where you look like a deer caught in the headlights he looks like the epitome of male pride.Â
Especially when he realizes it's your father on the other side. âDad-â You start, but you have no idea what you could even say. Your dress is in tatters and both you and Logan are still mussed up. Thereâs no hiding what happened here.Â
He doesnât let you finish, holding up his hand. His voice is eerily calm as he says, âI thought I heard something banging around in here.â
âYou did,â Logan scoffs, crossing his arms and glaring at your father. You feel your heart jump to your throat, staring over at him with a horrified look on your face. How could he think that was okay to say? It was so dismissive of what you believed had happened.Â
This was more than just a quickie in the dark to you. This meant something, but youâre seriously starting to doubt that it was the same for him as it was for you. And that just makes you feel like the stupid little girl everyone seems to believe you are.Â
Your father says your name but you canât bring yourself to meet his eye. âYouâre feeling sick,â he tells you, no room for argument. âYour date had to take you home. It was just too much too soon after the incident at the rally.â When you donât say anything he shouts out, âUnderstood?â That makes you jump.Â
âYes,â you clear your throat and face him. âYes, understood.â
Your father has made his stance on mutants clear. He hates them, despises them to their very being, and wishes he could kill every last one. And as much as you were raised with those ideas, they were never truly turned on you.
But heâs looking at you right now like he wishes you were never born. You feel like shit on his shoe. Something to be hidden away and buried. It makes your shoulders slump like a hundred pounds was just tossed onto your back.Â
You try to run past him but he jerks you back, fingers so tight around your bicep you feel the skin tear. You gasp in pain but donât say anything, too afraid to argue. âPut his jacket on, I wonât have you looking like a whore.â He releases you with a rough shove and storms off.Â
You can feel something burning at the back of your eyes. A moment later Logan drops his jacket over your shoulders, pulling you back into his chest and running his hands over your arms. âCome on, kid,â he mutters. Thereâs something resigned in his voice that makes your heart drop, âLetâs get you home.â
The walk through the lobby feels like youâre walking through a dream. Youâre not completely present for it, or the ride home. Your mind and your heart are warring and you feel like youâre going to be torn apart if you keep lingering on what just happened.Â
You just canât understand how you could go from having everything you wanted to feeling like the scum of the earth in less than two minutes. Logan doesnât speak as he drives you home. His knuckles are turning white around the steering wheel and youâre afraid to even try and start a conversation.Â
You donât want to hear him tell you that he didnât desire you past your body. You donât want to discover that youâre just another notch on his belt. He seems to do this a lot, sleep with the girls he guards. The idea of just being another job, another fun night, makes you absolutely disgusted with yourself.Â
When he pulls into the driveway of your house you both just sit in the car. Neither of you knows what to say. And the air between you is so thick with tension you feel like you could choke on it. You stare down at your hands, fingers fiddling with the ripped seams of your dress.Â
You pick at the threads and feel his stare on you. You canât do this. You canât deal with the possibility of rejection. Not after what happened between you and certainly not after what your father said.Â
You undo your seat belt and Logan watches as you go through the movements of getting up. His eyes never leave you and itâs like a physical caress, his stare. Normally it would make you warm inside, comforted by his presence. But right now all you can feel is the chill of where his cum has dried between your legs and the icy-hot stab of nausea in your gut.Â
You throw the door open and youâre nearly out when he calls out a quiet, âGoodnight.â
You donât look at him, you canât. You slam the door shut and walk silently to the front door of your house. You donât look back, donât respond, you just slip inside your house and finally let the weight of the night come crashing down on you.Â
You donât cry until you hear him pull out of the driveway.Â
Your father and stepmother usually stay at the hotel the night of a gala. Most nights you come home and enjoy the house to yourself for once. Tonight, youâre woken up by the front door slamming so hard your walls shake.Â
You can faintly hear your stepmotherâs voice trying to console your father. Sheâs muttering something to him you canât make out. You shoot out of bed, running to pull some sweatpants on. After youâd cried yourself out youâd taken a shower.Â
Youâve scrubbed your skin raw but you swear you can still smell him on you. You rush to your bedroom door, turning the knob quietly and slowly peeking your head outside. Your fatherâs at the bottom of the stairs, the second he spots your open door heâs screaming your name.Â
Your stomach twists painfully and you can feel panic starting to overwhelm you. Your hands shake and your legs are stiff as you slowly step into the hallway. Youâre a grown woman. You shouldnât feel like this because your dad is going to yell at you.Â
But heâs been so good at forcing you to rely on him. At forcing you to bend and break to fit his beliefs and mold. You donât know what to do if youâre not striving for his approval. And right now itâs very clear that heâs never been more disgusted by you.Â
If the look on his face isnât enough to twist the knife deeper, his words are. âI have never,â he screams at you. You take a step back, keeping the stairs between you, refusing to meet him in the middle. âBeen more embarrassed to call you my daughter. Do you have any idea how humiliating that was for me? Do you know how many people saw you being dragged outside like a fucking whore off the corner?â
You clench your eyes shut, turning your face away from him as the shame becomes a physical thing inside you. You can feel it making its way up your throat. Because heâs right. Tonight you were nothing more than a slut without any self-respect.Â
But youâre also pissed off. Youâre fucking enraged at yourself for being so stupid as to ever believe Logan wanted you for anything more than your body. You're mad at Logan for knowing how you feel about him and taking advantage of it. And youâre so fucking tired of doing everything you can to make your father proud and it never being enough.Â
âHave you ever once asked me what I want?â You raise your voice, screaming down at him with a ferocity that surprises even you. His eyes widen, frame trembling with unreleased rage. You plow through, not stopping because you know if you do, youâll never get this out. âNo, you havenât. Not once. Because you donât fucking love me! And it has taken me years to accept that, to finally realize that youâre incapable of loving anyone but yourself.â
You gasp, the noise wet and painful as something warm trickles down your cheek. You stare down at him with your eyes wide in realization. âItâs so clear to me now, I feel like an idiot for missing it for so long. You never loved me. Youâre incapable of it!âÂ
Youâre embarrassed at the way your voice cracks. As much as you want to pretend youâre stronger than him, not afraid of him. Thereâs still a little girl inside you who wonders why Daddy doesnât love you.Â
âI donât give a flying fuck what you want, Dad. I donât care what you want my life to look like or if I embarrassed you. Iâm glad I did, glad someone finally saw a sliver of the truth you try so desperately to hide-â
âEnough!â He shouts and it startles you so bad that you jump back, your abilities reacting and a vase behind you flying off the shelf. You duck as glass shatters across the stairs and floor. You glance at the scene with shocked eyes, looking down at your father to see that heâs not even a little bit surprised.Â
Instead, he just looks so deeply disappointed that it makes you shrink into yourself. The anger within you is extinguished in a second. He rubs his face, shaking his head and turning his back on you. âDad?â You call out, voice trembling.Â
âGo to your room,â he tells you quietly. âI donât want to look at you anymore.â You hover by the top of the stairs for a moment, not quite believing him yet. And when he realizes you're still there, that youâre not taking him seriously, he finally looks at you again.Â
âI wish every goddamn day that those doctors had just put you down. Iâd rather have a dead daughter than one like you.â
You stand there, stunned, even after the rest of the house has gone to bed. You clean up the pieces of glass while you try and swallow down your tears. Let the sharp edges dig into your skin and tear until you can feel any type of pain besides the one inside you.Â
A week of solitary confinement. Youâre surprised that you havenât just been kicked out of college. Youâre sure that your fatherâs many donations to the university are the only thing stopping your professors from dropping you from the class.Â
You donât care if they do or not, though. You never actually care about what you studied. Youâd just always hoped that it would be a way for you to escape the tight grip around your neck your dad has on you.Â
Youâve figured out that no matter how hard you fight, youâll never escape him. He hates you and yet, he canât let you go. Youâd laugh if you werenât busy wallowing in your depression.Â
Someone keeps leaving food by your door but you canât find it in yourself to be hungry. Youâll nibble on something, but you feel like youâre going to throw up when you so much as breathe the wrong way.Â
You havenât heard from Logan since that night. You knew your father would fire him the second he woke up. But youâd held out hope - foolishly - that he might still try and reach out to you. You have this childish image in your head of the prince coming to rescue the princess from the dragon.Â
But youâve been naive your whole life, you donât want to keep going down this road. You donât want to keep expecting the best of people and live your life in perpetual disappointment.Â
You havenât seen or spoken to your father since that night. Wordlessly, heâd banned you to your room. No oneâs said it, but you know youâre not allowed to come out. You donât know when heâs going to deem you useful again and drag you back out into the public eye.Â
Contrary to his belief, no one had seen you leave that night with Logan. You hadnât been in any tabloids or shitty news articles. Besides emotional estrangement from your father and losing the only guy youâve ever really liked, there were no consequences to your whorish behavior - as your father so lovingly puts it.Â
You roll over in your bed and picture yourself taking a shower. It feels like such a workout but you canât stand lying in your sweat and tears for much longer. With a long drawn-out groan, you throw yourself out of bed and enter the bathroom connected to your room.Â
You know youâll feel better afterward, but everything besides sleep sounds like too much work. Still, you force yourself inside and finally clean the grime of laying on your ass for a week off.Â
You walk naked through your room, making a beeline for your dresser. You feel a little better after washing yourself off and moisturizing. But not much. Physical health can only do so much for how you feel inside.Â
You hope this will blow over soon, youâre not sure how much longer you can take feeling so awful. You hate pitying yourself, and thatâs exactly what youâre doing right now. You huff irritatedly, digging around your drawers for your favorite shirt.Â
A hand clamps around your mouth, rough and big, yanking you back into a muscled chest and keeping you quiet. You still try and scream, hands clawing at the skin of their hand until you feel blood.Â
âFuck, quit that, would ya?â
Your erratic movements slowly come to a halt. You still feel your heart pounding against your chest, adrenaline warming your blood and making you feel like you're on fire from the inside out. But, you recognize the voice, recognize thereâs no danger to the situation.Â
That doesnât make you any less pissed off. When Logan is sure you wonât keep attacking him, he lets you go slowly. You immediately whirl around on him, uncaring that youâre still naked. Energy moves quickly through you, becoming a physical thing under your skin.Â
He smiles at you and you push the energy out, throwing him across your room. He flies into your bookshelf, crashing to the ground with a loud slam. âWhat the fuck are you doing?â You scream at him.Â
Thereâs no one home right now, luckily, or else you both would be screwed. He shakes his head off, brushing pieces of wood out of his hair and slowly getting to his feet. âWell, I was coming to say hi-â
âYou say hi by ambushing naked girls?â You interrupt, grabbing the clothes closest to you and pulling them on quickly.Â
Logan rolls his neck out and shrugs. âNo, that was just a plus,â he gives you that insufferable smirk and you want to scream.Â
This is the first time you see him in a week since you had sex together and your father officially disowned you. And this is what heâs leading with? Seriously? âYouâre a real fucking prince, Logan.â You shake your head with a scoff and glare at him.
He narrows his eyes, looking to be in disbelief at your attitude. âWhat happened?â You expect to hear irritation in his tone. Anger that youâre being such a bitch right now. Instead, he sounds concerned, like he can see right through you.Â
You hate that. You used to love having someone who could see past all the pretenses and walls, but it just hurts now. âNothing,â you tell him, unable to hold eye contact any longer. âLook,â you take in a deep breath, and your brows furrow in confusion. âHow the hell did you even get in here?â
Logan doesnât look like he wants to drop the topic just yet but he relents. He nods towards your window and you fix him with an astonished look. âI climbed, I didnât want your dad to risk seeing me on the security cameras out front.â
You feel suspicion brewing inside you, tone turning defensive. âLook, if you came here because you want to fuck again, I suggest you go find another girl. Iâm not interested anymore.â
âWell,â he scoffs, âI find that hard to believe.â How easily he just dismisses your words. Like they hold no real importance. It makes you want to scream. Instead, you just flick your wrist, throwing him into another wall. You donât know how youâre going to explain these holes in the wall to your father but you donât really care.Â
âEnough,â he snaps, brushing himself off and glaring at you. Your lips curl up in amusement, the first thing youâve felt besides anger and depression for the last week. âLook, I was coming here to get you the hell out, kid. Clearly, Iâm not wanted.â
He walks towards your window, intent on climbing back down the side of your house and leaving. You almost let him, if only to see him scurrying down the wall. Instead, you take a step forward and stop him with a small, âGet me out?â
He sighs, running an aggrieved hand over his face and propping the other on his hip. âYeah,â he mutters. âLook, I canât stand the thought of you cooped up in here, isolated from the rest of the world. Itâs not fair, I was gonna see if youâŠâ He trails off and roughly swallows.Â
Your interest piques. Whatever is this hard for him to get out has to be interesting. âLogan,â you call his name softly. âSee if I what?â
He huffs out a rough breath, turning around and staring you down. Thereâs something in his eyes, something reflected in yours. Heâs looking at you the same way you always look at him. âYou wanna come with me, kid?â
Well, youâd have to be an idiot to say no.Â
You donât leave a note. You donât give them any clues or hints as to where you might have gone. They can draw their own conclusions about what happened to you. They can tell the news whatever twisted lies they want.Â
You donât care, thatâs not your life anymore. Your life is packed away in a backpack in the back of Loganâs trailer. Your new life is in the passenger seat beside him. Youâre equal parts terrified and excited to figure out what youâre going to do with the rest of it.Â
a/n: can you tell I know fuck all about politics?
Also, smut, wow, this was hard and rough to write. I donât know why itâs such a struggle. I just feel guilty writing such dirty words, itâs absolutely diabolical that I have no problem being crazy over a guy whose age gap with me is the same age as my parents, but I canât write smut.
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1spâĄ
pt two
bodyguard!logan howlett x congressman's daughter!reader
a/n: the fact that he was canonically a bodyguard makes me absolutely insane someone congratulate me, I finally figured out how to make my own dividers Summary: He's learned from past mistakes that no matter how tempting the girl is, it's better not to get involved. He just needs some cash, he doesn't give a fuck how pretty you are. He doesn't care about you. He makes it clear he wants nothing to do with you besides seeing you sign his check. But, is that really all he wants? You're not blind to the way he looks at you. 18+ MDNI Shameless smut at the end, I'm not sorry about it at all.
Logan had gotten used to this. The long drawn-out wait to meet with the man who wanted to hire him. He always arrived right on time, not a moment earlier. They all had the same game they liked to play.Â
The secretary would greet him, a pretty girl in her 20s that the men were screwing or trying to screw. Then they would make him sit in the lobby for half an hour. Theyâd apologize by pushing the blame on someone else, saying a meeting had gone on too long. But there wasnât a meeting. There never was.Â
They liked to make themselves seem more important than they were. It was a power game, an intimidation tactic that he had always scoffed at. He didnât give a fuck what government ties they had or otherwise. He just wanted his paycheck.Â
This one was no different. A congressman who had only recently begun to make waves when he started up an anti-mutant agenda. Ironic that he had specifically requested Logan for the very thing he was trying to eradicate.Â
There was a buzz and then the secretary was picking up her phone. She spared Logan a fleeting glance before whispering something into the receiver. She looked over at him and he already knew what she was going to say. âHeâs ready for you now.âÂ
âThanks, sweetheart,â she gave him a coquettish smile as he made his way towards the large office at the end of the hall. The door was closed when he reached it, three quick knocks and then a quiet Come in.Â
The man didnât even look up to greet him. He continued signing something on his desk. Logan took a seat in one of the chairs, waiting for another few minutes before he was deemed important enough to address. He received a tight smile and narrowed eyes as the man took in the way he was dressed.Â
He never dressed up for these things. Heâd learned a while ago that a suit wasnât going to get him any further than his leather jacket was. Might as well be comfortable while talking to these pricks.Â
âHad a phone call with an associate of mine. Ran on longer than I meant it to.â Always an excuse, never an apology.Â
Logan scoffed and shrugged. âI was fine.â
The man sniffed, âIâm sure. Look, Iâll cut straight to the chase. You come highly recommended by my peers and I need help fast.â Logan nodded, motioning for him to continue. The manâs eyes lingered on his fists for a long while before he finished. âItâs my daughter. Things have been a little rough for her at school, for lack of a better word. Especially since this new campaign started. I just need someone to keep a closer eye on her.â
Loganâs eyes narrowed, âShe a party girl or something?â He wasnât sure he could handle another bratty daddyâs girl again. The last one had nearly made him blow his brains out. They always think flipping their skirts up will let them get away with more and he canât stand it.Â
The manâs face blanched and he shook his head so vigorously that his jowls moved with him. âOh, no, not at all. But sheâs,â he paused and lowered his voice. He leaned in closer to Logan and waited for Logan to do the same. He rolled his eyes but did it anyway. âSheâs like you, you know.â
Logan shot him a grin, âYou mean a mutant.â
âLower your voice,â he hissed, face tightening up in anger. âBut, yes, a mutant. And I need one to guard her.â Ironic, this man was driving a campaign to make mutants second-class citizens, and his daughter was one. But Logan needed a check, he didnât give a fuck about the morals of it all.Â
âSounds good to me.â
âPerfect, you can pick her up from school for me.â
You had your earbuds in, head lowered while you made the trek across campus when you noticed him. He was difficult to miss, tall and buff. Very buff, youâre surprised that tank top of his hasnât ripped every time he flexes.Â
Your dadâs newest campaign has you hyper-aware of your surroundings. You canât afford to let your guard down. Not after the last attack.Â
Thereâs something about this man that tells you he isnât someone looking to jump you, though. Youâre not sure what it is. Every part of him screams danger, but not the type youâre looking out for. The cigar perched between his lips, the glistening muscles you want to bite, heâs trouble.Â
When you spot him outside your lecture hall for the third time that day, you finally figure out whatâs happening. Your dad had told you heâd hired someone new to watch over you at school. You hadnât voiced just how against it you were, but you didnât like the idea.Â
You didnât mind this guy, though. He wasnât busting into your classes and embarrassing the shit out of you by making everyone empty their pockets like the last guy. He just lingered. You could deal with lingering.Â
What you couldnât deal with was the way he was leaning against his motorcycle, smirking as you slowly approached him.Â
âDid my dad hire you?â You call out, tugging your earbuds out. âWho are you?â
He speaks around the cigar like it's second nature. âYour new bodyguard, sweetheart.â You suck in a deep breath when you hear his voice. Heâs extremely attractive, you're surprised your dad would risk this.Â
One of the other ones had kind of gotten a little obsessed, stalking you even in his off hours. You didnât think your dad would want another pretty boy around you. Though, you suppose this one isnât pretty. Heâs extremely handsome, ruggedly so, very manly. Jesus, you might end up being the stalker this time.Â
His lips curl up like he knows what youâre thinking about. You clear your throat, shifting your backpack higher up your arm. âYou planning on taking me home on that?â You ask, pointing at his bike.Â
He straightens up and shrugs. âGot a problem with the bike?â
You grin, âNot really,â but your dad will. âNo, not at all.â
You walk towards him and he reaches out, grabbing your backpack straps and tugging you towards him. You stumble, hands bracing against his chest so you donât land flat on your face. âSorry, kid,â but he doesnât sound sorry at all. He buckles the straps of your backpack together and tightens them, puffing smoke in your face while he does. âDonât want this flying off.â
âMhm,â you hum. Youâre not paying attention at all. The only thing you care about right now is just how ripped he is under your hands. Youâre not sure how long you gawk at him but he seems to be ridiculously amused by it.Â
âReady to go home, or what?â You jump back from him, brushing your hands off on your leggings and clearing your throat.Â
âYes, yeah.â You rip your eyes off his body and instead focus on the bike. âNo helmets?â You ask.
âYou heal, donât you?â You nod and he shrugs. âDonât need them then, do we?â
You canât help the giddy grin on your face at that. Itâs gotten tiring being treated like glass. Youâre about to get on the bike when you finally process what he said. âWait, how do you know I heal?â
He doesnât respond verbally. Instead, his gaze darts down to his fists. Your eyes widen when you see the metal poking through the skin. Of course, your father would only tell another mutant about his abomination of a daughter. You scoff and roll your eyes. Heâs such a fucking hypocrite.Â
Logan climbs on the bike and you follow after him. You're hesitant to wrap your arms around his waist but he just reaches behind himself and jerks you forward.Â
You suck in a sharp breath, pelvis tight against his ass while he squeezes your hands. âYou want to go flying?â You shake your head and he chuckles, starting the bike and driving off without another word.Â
Part of you loves the ride home, the other part detests it. For once you get to experience a little freedom. Youâre not trapped in a steel box staring at the back of a car seat while the man beside you pretends he doesnât exist.Â
You can feel the wind in your hair, get a taste of real speed, and enjoy a moment uninterrupted by someoneâs expectations of you. On the other hand, Logan does not respect speeding laws. And healing abilities or not, you donât actually want to experience road rash.Â
He manages to get you home in one piece, parking the motorcycle in the driveway and waiting for you to get off. But you canât, your thighs have been clenching the seat so tight you think they might need to scrape you off.Â
âKid?â He mutters. You shake your head against his back, arms still strangling his waist. It was actually kind of fucking terrifying being on one of these things. You canât tell if you loved or hated it.Â
He lets out a rough sigh, forcibly moving your arms and then tugging you off the seat. Your legs are like jello while you try and straighten out. âWasnât so bad, was it?â He asks. You canât manage much more than a strangled hum and he laughs.Â
You turn to your front door and spot a leering face peering out the window. âShit,â you huff. Your stepmother sees you spot her and disappears from view. You feel your hopes of ever getting back on that bike go with her.Â
âYou took her home on your bike!â
âWell-â
You flinch at the volume of your fatherâs voice. âI donât give a fuck what your excuse is! I will not have my daughter seen riding that monstrosity! You are not to do this again, do you understand me?â
You donât know what Logan says, but youâre certain itâs not the submissive Yes, sir your father is looking for. He continues shouting at him for another ten minutes. When you hear the door to his office open you scramble to look like you hadnât been listening in.Â
But youâre a bad actress and if his huff of laughter is anything to go by, Logan knows what you were doing. âDid you know that was going to happen?â He asks, pointing back to your fatherâs, now closed, study.Â
You nod, pursing your lips with an apologetic smile. âIf it helps, I was really hoping he wouldnât do that.â
He shrugs, âI donât really give a fuck how much he wants to scream at me.â Itâs refreshing, to finally have someone in the house who doesnât kiss your fatherâs ass. It makes you smile, a real genuine smile for the first time in a while.Â
You stand from the chair youâd been sitting in, gesturing further into your home. âAre you hungry? I havenât eaten all day so I was thinking about making something.â
The smirk drops from his face, expression suddenly serious. It makes you tense up. âLook, I appreciate the offer, but Iâm here to get paid. I donât want to be your friend, kid.â
You suck in a sharp breath, trying not to let the rejection sting. Heâs a professional, it should be a relief after the last one. âRight, yeah, Iâm sorry I didnât mean it like that.â
He nods, âRight,â tone stiff. You stare at him for another awkwardly long moment before you finally turn on your heel and walk toward the kitchen. You rush there, speedwalking so you donât have to look at him any longer.Â
You open up your fridge, keeping your back to him for as long as humanly possible. You can hear him take a seat at the island, can feel the way his eyes bore into you. Itâs a physical thing, his gaze, makes chills scrape their way down your spine.Â
You make yourself a sandwich and finally force yourself to turn around. Like youâd expected, heâs already looking at you. Lips ticking up just slightly when you finally get the courage to look up at him.Â
Logan feels a little guilty. You werenât coming onto him earlier, you were being genuine with your kindness. He knows there were no ulterior motives to it and thereâs a very slight part of him that feels bad for making you so quiet. âWhyâs your dad so pissy about the bike?â
Youâre a little startled by the question, after the comment he made youâd thought he wouldnât want anything to do with you. You swallow down the rest of your bite and cough a little when the bread gets stuck on the roof of your mouth.Â
âHe doesnât want me to crash.â
âBut you heal,â he points out bluntly and you canât help but laugh a little.Â
âYeah, thatâs the problem. He doesnât want me to crash and for someone to see that I miraculously healed. Having a freak for a daughter wouldnât exactly help his campaign, would it?â You canât even attempt to hide the bitterness in your voice. And you know Logan picks up on it because he doesnât ask any more questions.Â
Your gaze drops to your plate and you finish the rest of your meal in silence. Or, you try to. âGot any plans tonight?â
You chuckle and give him an odd look. âNo,â you respond sardonically. âNone at all, prepare yourself for a very boring job. I donât even know why he hired you, I never leave the house unless it's for school.â
âYeah?â he muses, but he doesnât seem particularly interested. More like heâs talking just to pass the time. âI heard youâve been having a hard time at school.â
You suck in a sharp breath, a sudden wave of anger roiling through your gut. The cabinets behind you begin to shake and you wince in embarrassment, tamping down on your powers before you accidentally blow up the kitchen.Â
Logan watches the moment with subdued interest like heâs not all that surprised or impressed with the display. âUnless they were a PoliSci nerd, I was a nobody up until last year.â Thereâs no concealing the hate lurking within your words, âAnd then my dad took up this whole anti-mutant regime. Well, you can imagine how much the activists love me. Iâve just had a few incidents with some particularly passionate protestors.â
âDo you believe in it?â
Your eyes widen in surprise, you hadnât expected him to actually continue the conversation. âWhat do you mean?â
He leans back, arms crossed across his chest in a way that makes his biceps bulge. He shrugs, âThe anti-mutant regime, do you agree with it?â
You open your mouth, the perfected script almost rolling off your tongue. But this isnât some politician's son youâre wooing. Youâre not the perfect daughter, youâre in your own home, finally talking to someone else like you.Â
âNo.â You answer, voice strong in its conviction. âAnd every time I see one of his PAs running around with their little signs I want to ram the stick up their ass.â
He barks out a laugh, eyes crinkling up in amusement. âI think we might get along, kid.â
You try to ignore the way your cheeks warm at his words. You donât want to be this affected by him, youâve barely spoken to him. But this is the first person in a long time that you know with absolute certainty you can be honest with. He doesnât care about protecting your political image or bowing to your fatherâs every whim.Â
Itâs a relief, like a constricting weight being taken off your chest. You give him an easy smile and get up to wash your dishes. His eyes are on you again but they feel less oppressive this time. Youâve already forgotten the rule heâs set in place, youâre not supposed to be friends.Â
Itâs going to be hard to remember that.Â
Your father tightens his grip around your waist until you feel like you might squeal. âSmile, now.â You raise your hand, taking the stairs up the stage and waving out at the crowd thatâs formed. Itâs hot today, your makeup would be melting off if it werenât for the artists who put it on for you.Â
Always have to look good in front of the camera. All of you. Seeing Logan in a suit was certainly a surprise. Youâre almost completely sure that your father had to give him a bonus to even consider wearing it today.Â
He looks good, but you honestly prefer him in the normal beater and leather jacket. Itâs something so uniquely him. This is just a reminder of your reality, that nothing around you is real. Itâs all pretty lies wrapped up in expensive clothes.Â
You have to bite your tongue and hold back a grimace when your father begins his speech. âFirst, we had to let them into our jobs. Now theyâre in our schools! Our children arenât safe, not when theyâve got loaded weapons sitting beside them! Because thatâs exactly what they are, weapons of mass destruction that will take apart-â
âFuck me,â you hiss under your breath. Your cheeks hurt from keeping this smile on your face. Youâre struggling not to flinch every time the crowd surges up to agree with him, bigoted shouts making your ears bleed.Â
Loganâs brows raise and he gives you a brief glance over his shoulder. Your face pinches in confusion only for a moment before you quickly correct it. Still, you keep your lips nearly completely motionless as you whisper, âCan you hear me?â
You dart your gaze back down to him and catch the barest of nods. Your smile softens, becoming something real if only for a moment. You donât say anything else, you donât need to. Itâs just a comfort to know someone else is there with you, seeing through the painted faces and plastic smiles.Â
Thereâs movement in the crowd. It cuts your father off midsentence. He peers over the podium, trying to get a better look at whatâs happening. You hear someone scream and then the entire crowd is getting knocked to the ground.Â
You jump back in shock, everyone on stage still. The security, however, is rushing to get to you and your family. Itâs too late, though, thereâs a mutant in the crowd and his eyes are set on you. âFuck you,â he screams out your father's name and lugs something at the stage.Â
You hear someone shout your name but itâs too late. Glass shatters against the side of your face. It takes less than a second for the pain to start. You can feel holes being burned through your skin, like living fire melting through your bones and gums. A scream rips out of your throat, your hands coming up to block your face too late.Â
âGet her out of here!â
As agonizing as it is, you can already feel your skin working to mend itself. You can practically hear the flesh bonding back together. But the acid is dripping down you. It keeps moving steadily through your clothes and skin, your abilities on overdrive trying to repair the damage.Â
You canât focus on anything except the sensation of being burned alive. Suddenly, thereâs an arm being thrown around your shoulder and youâre being lifted off your feet. Your skin scrapes against the rough material of someoneâs blazer and it makes you grit your teeth and scream again.Â
âI know, hold on kid, itâll be over in a minute.â Logan rushes you behind the stage, where there are no cameras to watch you heal. You donât know how your fatherâs PR team is going to spin this. Everyone saw it, saw the way your flesh bubbled and boiled. Thereâs no hiding the fact that half your face should be melted off.Â
âCar,â you grunt out when he puts you on your feet again.Â
His hands are clamped firmly around your shoulders, inspecting you for any further damage. âWhat?â
âWe gotta get to the car,â the words are a struggle to get out. Your lungs constrict painfully in your chest while you force the rest out. âCanât let them see.â
He looks pissed off that that's what you're worried about and not the fact that you were just attacked. Finally, after a minute of just staring at you, he nods. He wraps an arm around your shoulder and runs with you back to the limo. He throws the door open, pushing you inside and sliding in beside you.Â
You take in a deep breath the second youâre no longer in view of the TV cameras. âFuck,â you gasp out. Your dress is in tatters on your left side and you quickly cover your chest. You pray that you didnât accidentally flash anything while you were still on stage. Your father would never forgive you for that.Â
Itâs silent in the car for a moment. You feel something being draped over your shoulder and look over to see Logan passing you his jacket. When he catches your gaze he gently grabs your jaw and titls your face towards his.Â
His eyes rove over the left side of your face and he gives you a tight smile. âYouâre fine, kid.â
You pull your chin out of his grip and pull his jacket closed around you. âSee why my father wanted you around? How would he have ever explained his daughter surviving an acid attack?â
Thereâs something pinched in his gaze. A deep-seated irritation and something else youâre too tired to identify. Heâs looking at you oddly and you wish he wouldnât. You press your forehead to the cool glass of the window and slump against the car door.Â
You donât know when you fall asleep but by the time you wake up, Loganâs already carrying you up to your room. He sees you shift awake and places you on your feet. You steady yourself against the stair banister and walk the rest of the way to your room, trying to shake off the pain of the day.Â
You look back just in time to see Logan at the front door. âGoodnight,â you call down to him. You know he can hear you, but he walks through the door without another word. You bite your lip, ignoring the sinking feeling of your gut.Â
You toss your destroyed dress to the floor and turn your TV on. You surf through the channels for a bit before finding a clip of todayâs incident. â-apparently part of a protest for mutants against the government. I donât know Bill, they seem to just be proving everybodyâs point. They are unsafe.â
âI agree, my thoughts and prayers go out toâŠâ
You roll your eyes as they say your name. Theyâre saying it wasnât acid, instead itâs some sort of chemical compound that causes extreme pain. Even you donât believe that bullshit. You have a feeling your father is going to be looking for a new PR team tomorrow.Â
Your attention is snagged by the replay of the accident. You donât focus on the acid, you donât want to. Instead, you see how quickly Logan rushed to your side. He seemed to be right there even as the acid was being thrown.Â
Your brows pinch together and you glance at the jacket beside you. Heâd forgotten to take it back before he left. You pick it up, eyes skating over the fabric before you find what youâre looking for. Thereâs a large hole in the right sleeve, acid having burned through it.Â
You hadnât even realized he was in pain. You know he can heal, but it doesnât get rid of the fluttering feeling in your stomach. Youâve never had someone look after you like that.Â
You grin to yourself, tucking the jacket in the back of your closet. Youâre sure he wouldnât want it back and youâre not planning on parting with it anytime soon.Â
Youâre on house arrest for a week after the acid incident. Which includes no school. Your father has to play into the idea that youâre recovering from the trauma and healing. You donât know how much longer heâs planning on keeping you locked up but youâre going stir crazy.Â
Not only do you not get to go to classes, but Logan isnât around either. He doesnât need to be, not when the only place youâre in is your room. Heâs not a friend, heâs made that clear, but heâs something. And you are desperately craving that specific something.Â
âIt was a sickening attack against my daughter that my wife and I are still trying to recover from.â You roll your eyes as you listen to your father spew his bullshit to the interviewer in the next room.Â
Youâre not allowed to be out and about, of course. You canât risk someone seeing you. But that doesnât stop you from lurking.Â
âIt was an incredibly traumatic experience for her, Iâm sure.â You grin to yourself, picking at your nails. You like this one, whoever the reporter is interviewing him. She hasnât let him catch a break. Especially not when he tries to capitalize on your trauma. Even though he hasnât checked in once with you.Â
âWell,â he splutters for a moment. âYes, of course,â he tries to sound humble but anyone can tell heâs just covering his ass. âAnd it just further proves what Iâve always said about mutants. They are animals, theyâre not like us.â
Youâd think at a certain point youâd go numb to it. Youâve been raised hearing this rhetoric from him all your life. But the sting never eases. That cloying ache in your chest never quite leaves you. Not when you know the only reason he publicly accepts you is for political gains. So everyone can see what a wonderful father he is and vote for him.
You feel sick to your stomach and you donât think you can listen to much more of this. But right as youâre about to tap out a hand clamps down on your shoulder. You nearly scream but you catch a whiff of the manâs aftershave and your mouth snaps shut.Â
You leap out of your chair and whip around, a grin plastered on your face. âLogan, what are you doing here?â You canât disguise the giddiness in your voice. He might constantly be reminding you that you hold nothing more than a professional relationship, but you donât give a shit. Heâs a constant in your life and thatâs rare for you, so youâll latch onto whatever comfort you can find.Â
His gaze briefly darts to the connecting wall to your fatherâs study and you flush. Heâd probably heard all of that. Youâve never had someone see the side of your father that you do. Thereâs something shamefully embarrassing about it.Â
He looks back at you and gives you a sly smirk. âWanna get out of here?â Youâd have to be an idiot to say no.
âUh,â you can hear the music from where you stand across the street. You shuffle uncertainly on your feet beside Logan, glancing up and down the sidewalk like your fatherâs going to pop out of an alleyway. âI donât know if this is such a good idea.â
Logan tugs his cigar out of his mouth. Heâs leaned up against a lamppost and heâs watched you struggle for the past ten minutes. âLive a little kid, would ya?â
You look back at the dingy bar and grimace. âOkay, thereâs a difference between living a little and having my face blasted on the news. Howâs it going to look if Iâm photographed at a bar while Iâm meant to be healing?â
Logan points with his cigar to the entrance of the bar. âI can promise you, no one in there gives a fuck about who your daddy is.â Comforting, and a little humbling.Â
You take in a deep breath and Logan must sense the change in your demeanor. He flicks the cigar to the ground, crushing it with the heel of his boot. He holds his arm out, âReady, kid?â
You nod, hurrying to his side and slipping under his grasp. He lets his arm hang heavily around your shoulder, hand squeezing your bicep gently to try and quell your nerves. Youâd be swooning at the touch if you werenât about to throw up from anxiety.Â
You used to have a life. Until your father had blown it up. You havenât been around this many people in ages. Well, you havenât been around people who are just having fun and not sucking up to every politicianâs kid they meet.Â
The music gets louder as you step over through the threshold of the bar. The soles of your shoes stick to the floor. People laugh loudly all around you, some of them shouting up at TV screens for whatever sport is currently playing. Youâre sure half of them donât even normally watch the game. They just need an excuse to get their wives off their backs.Â
The thought brings a small smile to your lips. Logan glances down at you and frowns, âYou are old enough to drink, arenât you?â
You roll your eyes and move out from under his hold. âYes, Logan. Iâm going into a masterâs program, my frontal lobe is fully formed.â
He huffs a little at the attitude, cheeks twitching with a suppressed smile. He nods towards the back of the bar, âFind a seat, Iâll get us drinks.â He walks towards the bar without another word and you resent him a little for it.Â
Without him beside you, itâs like everything comes crashing down all at once. The songs playing grate on your ears. Every laugh feels like theyâre screaming in your face. Youâve never been more in tune with your sense of smell and you hate it.Â
Your hands tremble by your sides and you nearly miss the man in front of you spilling his beer down his shirt. It looks completely unnatural, the way it just flips out of his hand. And you know itâs your doing.Â
You shove through him and his friends, running to the back and sliding into the first booth you see. You dig your nails into your palms, taking a few deep breaths to try and calm your heart rate down a bit.Â
Logan slides into the seat across from you, placing a beer in front of you. Itâs barely touched the grimy wood of the table before you tip your head back and drain it. Youâve never been a particular fan of beer or any alcohol for that matter.Â
But right now you need a buzz before you accidentally level the whole bar. You slam the bottle back on the table, taking in a deep breath, and sitting back. Logan gives you a hard stare, glancing between you and the empty bottle.Â
He clicks his tongue and stands up, âIâll go get another one.â
You bite your lip and give him a sheepish, âThank you.â
It doesnât take long for the buzz to settle in. Thereâs a slight tingling in your legs and the tips of your fingers. It almost feels like how you get when youâre starting to get aroused. But you donât know if thatâs from the alcohol or the way Logan looks in his slutty little t-shirt.Â
Definitely tipsy, you think to yourself, nudging your third beer to the side.Â
âAlways been a lightweight?â He teases, watching you with amusement in his gaze while he works on what must be his fifth whiskey.Â
You shake your head with a soft smile. âNo, I used to go out with my friends all the time.â You laugh a little at the memories and lean in a little closer like youâre sharing some horrible secret. Logan rolls his eyes but acquiesces, leaning in to listen to you speak. âWe made up alter egos for our drunk selves. Wanna know mine?â You ask, wiggling your eyebrows at him with a stupid grin.
His brows pinch together and he frowns, âI donât think so.â
You laugh and lean back in your seat. âYouâre the worst!â He places his glass down on the table and fixes you with an odd look. You shift around uncomfortably, âWhat is it?â
âWhat happened to your friends? Why are you hanging out with me and not them?â
âOh,â your gaze drops to the table and you suddenly find the stains on it very interesting. Itâs practically abstract art. You swallow harshly around the lump in your throat and shrug. âUm, just all the stuff with my dad happened, and,â you shrug, âI donât know. My life kind of fell apart.â
You try and shake off the funk, bring back the happy-go-lucky feeling you were in only minutes ago. âI had to move out of the dorms and head back home. My friends stopped talking to me. My boyfriend dumped me. It all just kind of blew up.â
Logan frowns and you swear he seems angry on your behalf. Itâs a nice feeling, having someone care enough to hold a grudge for you. âYou ever tell him how it was all affecting you?â
You snort, âOf course I did. He was overjoyed. He never liked my friends, especially not my boyfriend, they encouraged me to be too independent. He thought I was losing the values he raised me with. He just never cared to learn that I never agreed with them in the first place.â
Logan doesnât say anything for a while and you let your gaze drift to the karaoke stage. Two women are singing a bad redemption of Led Zeppelin and it makes you smile. You donât see the way Loganâs eyes linger on the curve of your lips and then drop to your chest.Â
You never seem to notice how you make him squirm. There is something so interesting about you. Something so different from the families he worked with before. He doesnât know if it's the whole mutant thing, if you two are somehow kindred spirits in that regard. He doubts it, heâs never really cared much about that.Â
But he knows that there is something magnetic about you. It draws him in and makes him hate his own rules. He promised not to get involved with another client. It always ends messy, most times bloody.Â
You turn back to him and smile. Your voice is a low purr as you ask, âYou wanna get out of here?â
Of course, heâs never been one to follow the rules.Â
âI am so sorry about this. Really.âÂ
Logan glares down at you while you straighten out his tie. You duck your head so you donât have to meet his gaze and he lets out a long-suffering sigh.Â
âForget it, kid.â He says it with a smirk but it doesnât make you feel any less guilty.Â
This will be your first public appearance since the incident. Itâs a gala, of course, because your father hates you. Heâd demanded you find a date, someone to look pretty on your arm because he doesnât want you talking while youâre there. Youâre meant for pictures and nothing more.Â
Considering the fact that no one wants to talk to you on campus, the acid incident not helping at all, you had no luck finding a date. Youâd had to beg on hands and knees for days to get Logan to agree.Â
You donât know what it is that finally made him cave but youâre grateful for it. You think your father was expecting you to fail. To come crawling to him and be forced to go with who he wanted you to go with.Â
You were not going to spend the whole night listening to some political major try and explain your own fatherâs campaign to you. Youâd rather swallow acid than go through that for another night. Your father, of course, doesnât know that Logan is taking you.Â
Youâre planning on ambushing him with it. He canât do anything about it now. He wants you to have a date for some reason and thereâs no way for him to find a backup now. You take a step back from him and turn to look in the mirror.Â
Side by side, you do make an incredibly attractive couple. He looks amazing in his suit, his muscles just slightly pushing against the fabric. And as much as he hates the tie and constricting material, he makes it work.Â
And you feel pretty for the first time in a long time. You actually got to do your own hair and makeup for once. Youâre a lot less heavy-handed than the assistants your father hires. You feel comfortable in your own skin, finally, wearing the deep red dress your stepmother had gotten for you.Â
âWe look good,â you muse.Â
Logan looks down at you and smiles slightly, âYou do.â
You give him a confused grin, âI said we.â
He leans down, lips brushing against the shell of your ear as he whispers, âI know what you said, sweetheart.â Your heart nearly beats out of your chest at the proximity. Gooseflesh raises on your arms where heâs touching you and your knee buckles ever so slightly.Â
You can perfectly imagine his husky voice whispering something much, much dirtier to you. He pulls back with a slight chuckle and forcefully turns you around. âCome on, kid, weâre gonna be late.â
He nudges you towards your bedroom door and you nod your head mutely. He keeps doing that to you. These little things that could be so easily dismissed as you reading into his actions. But you know, deep down, youâre not reading into anything.Â
But you donât know what to do with this information that he might possibly be into you. Or at the very least, attracted to you. He made it clear early on that he wants nothing but professionalism between the two of you, yet he continually breaks his own rule.Â
Your father and stepmother are waiting at the bottom of the stairs for you both. Your stepmother smiles when she sees you but your fatherâs face screws up in anger. âAre you fucking kidding me? The goddamn bodyguard?â
You shrug and slip past him, already walking to the front door. âA dateâs a date.â You pause and grin over at him, âWhat are you going to do about it?â Itâs a taunt, one you donât give him a chance to respond to.Â
Youâre already slipping outside and heading to the town car. Something about Logan being with you emboldens you to act in ways you never would. Even when heâs not there, when youâre just having family dinner and your father says something off-putting. You fight back, you donât let him steamroll you and your opinions.Â
You feel better than you have in ages with Logan beside you. Still, the ride there is incredibly awkward.Â
The hotel is grand and luxurious. But they all are. You feel guilty complaining about your life when this is your weekend. What do you have to be upset about when you regularly stay in five-star motels and wear designer dresses without glancing at the price tag?
Sometimes you feel guilty around Logan. You wonder if he ever resents you for your privilege. You might be a mutant like him, sure, but youâve never had to struggle to make ends meet. Or try and scrap together enough money to get your next meal. Youâve never had to worry about where youâre going to sleep next or if youâll have a roof over your head.Â
Your struggles have been so different that you worry if something ever did happen between the two of you, you might not work together.Â
But those are spiraling thoughts for another time. Right now, youâre just trying to get through the front door without someone bombarding your father with questions on his stance about whatever.Â
When itâs clear that heâs going to be there for a while, he sends you and Logan off to the ballroom on your own. You feel bad for your stepmother, having to stay behind and pretend sheâs interested as they bore her with stories that have no real meaning.Â
âPoor woman,â you mutter, watching her struggle to keep the smile on her face.Â
âYou donât call her mom,â Logan muses. You turn to look at him and he just shrugs. âJust a little weird.â
âWell, sheâs not my mom.â His head tilts in confusion and you elaborate. âMy bio mom left the second she figured out she gave birth to a mutant. We lie to the public, stepmomâs interfere with the perfect nuclear family ideal my dadâs pushing for.â
âIf he cares so much about family then why donât you have your dadâs last name?â A good question, one you had to field a lot when you first started school.Â
You give him a sly grin, âTook my mom's maiden name the second I was eighteen, just to piss him off.â Thereâs no true reason behind it other than being vindictive and petty. âHeâs been trying to get me to change it for years but he canât force me to. Besides, I like having my name separate from theirs. Lets me pretend Iâm not a part of the family. Donât get me wrong, sheâs nice and all, we just never really had the chance to bond.â
Someone passes by you. A couple you know youâre supposed to recognize but you canât place their names. The man calls out your name, coming toward you with his arms open wide. You can see Logan tense up slightly beside you, bodyguard instincts coming out for a moment.Â
You squeeze his hand briefly before stepping forward to hug the man. âSo nice to see you, again.â You tell him. He grins and squeezes you a little closer to his chest than necessary.Â
Logan clears his throat, glaring at the manâs drifting hands. Before either of you can react, Logan is pulling you back, hand resting lightly over the small of your back. He holds his hand out, forcing the man to shake his hand and take his attention off of you.
You canât hold back the smile on your lips when you see how much smaller the man is under Loganâs intense stare. Youâve gotten used to the men at these events treating you however they want. They donât see you as a human, you are your fatherâs accessory and their toy. You envy Logan for how easily he can dismiss these men, take away their larger-than-life personalities, and reduce them to the sniveling rats they truly are.Â
He doesnât even speak, simply tugs you towards the ballroom and away from the manâs wandering hands. You canât help the stupid smile on your face while you look at him. He glances out the side of his eye and huffs, âWhat?â He snaps, tone impatient.Â
You shrug and shake your head. âNothing, youâre justâŠâ You trail off, unsure how to continue. You donât want to make him uncomfortable by telling him how you really feel about him. How deeply you appreciate him, how horribly you desire him. Youâre afraid it will all just blow up in your face. That youâll have truly been reading into everything and gotten his intentions all wrong. After all, heâs made it abundantly clear that thereâs meant to be nothing between the two of you except a paycheck.Â
You take in a deep breath, smile faltering, âNothing.â You finally spit out, slipping out of his grasp and walking quicker towards the doors. His hand lingers on your back, fingers trailing slowly down your spine until youâre completely out of his reach.Â
The chatter inside gets louder the closer you get to the entrance. You listen to the indiscernible voices, the quartet playing in the corner, and the clink of metal on the glass as they all eat. You straighten out your shoulders and put on your best smile, mentally preparing yourself to keep it stiff on your cheeks for the rest of the night.Â
Logan catches up to you, the both of you stopping the second you see the inside of the ballroom.Â
People Against Mutants
Evolution or Monstrosities
Parents for the Removal of Mutant Children
Your eyes widen as you take in the banners and signs hanging off the walls. More and more uncreative rhetoric all for the annihilation of mutants. Of people like you and Logan. Your smile drops immediately and you know you should have expected something like this from your father. Heâd been refusing to tell you what this gala was for, saying offhandly he was just raising some money.Â
You thought it was another charity. Not this. Not people, quite literally, calling for your head. For Loganâs head. You suck in a sharp breath and glance towards the silent man beside you. His jaw is clenched as he takes in all the finely dressed people around you. Theyâre all laughing and chatting like theyâre not actively campaigning for the destruction of children.Â
âBar?â You ask, already walking towards it.Â
âSounds good to me.â His hand is on your back again and youâre grateful for it. The glower on his face, the attitude that screams I donât belong here keeps people away from you. He shoulders through the men huddling around the bar, forcefully clearing space for the two of you.Â
And when they turn around, posturing like theyâre going to say something, he only has to look at them for them to retreat with their tails tucked. Itâs ridiculously attractive seeing someone command these men so easily.Â
âWhiskey,â Logan grumbles, he looks back at you and you slide beside him, leaning your elbows against the cool counter.Â
âJust champagne, please,â you tell the bartender. He nods, quickly making your drinks and handing them to you. You turn with the flute in your hand, surveying the room. It feels less like a gala and more like a production of false niceties that will never end and never be genuine.Â
âDonât know how you deal with these fuckers all the time,â Logan mutters, glaring as a man slams into him and keeps walking without apologizing.Â
You let out a short huff of laughter, âHonestly,â he glances over at you and you shrug. âIâve got no fucking clue either.â He scoffs and takes a swig from his glass. But you canât take your eyes off of him. You feel the words on the tip of your tongue, weighing you down until you feel like you have no choice but to spit them out.Â
âYou,â his brows quirk up and he glances over at you. You take in a deep breath and start over, nerves making your palms sweaty around the glass. âYou make it bearable.â
Loganâs face falls and he sucks in a deep breath. You see the expression on his face, you know what heâs going to tell you. And you hate how apologetic he looks. You especially despise the way heâs making you feel pitied. Heâs never done that before and you donât want him to start now.Â
âDonât,â you tell him before he can say anything. You let out a self-deprecating laugh and place the champagne flute on the bar so you donât have to look at him. âI know what youâre going to say, alright. So, just, donât.â
Logan purses his lips and grabs your jaw. You try and jerk your face out of his grasp but he doesnât let you, he forces you to look at him. He only lets go once you reluctantly make eye contact. Youâre surprised by the look on his face. Thereâs no pity in his gaze like youâd expected.Â
This is something else, something darker and more twisted. You canât put your finger on what exactly youâre seeing but you know it makes your heart race and your thighs clench. âListen, sweetheart, I-â
âWhat the hell are you doing?â You jump away from him but Logan just clenches his eyes shut with a short huff of irritated breath. You clear your throat and turn to face your father. Heâs glaring between you and Logan, but smiles warmly anytime someone looks your way. âI didnât bring you here so my contributors could see what a fucking whore you are for the help.â
âDad!â You exclaim, eyes widening in horror. But Logan doesnât seem bothered by your fatherâs words. If anything it seems to incense him, his hand drifting from your jaw to drape itself over the nape of your neck. You try not to show just how much the possessive grip is affecting you but you know they can both tell.Â
Your fatherâs face pinches and he nearly stomps his foot as he looks between you and Logan. He looks like he wants to say something else but your stepmother, thankfully, calls his name. She waves him over towards her and you hold your breath, waiting to see what heâs going to do.Â
He takes in short puffs of air, straightening out his suit jacket and glaring at you. âYouâre not going to be a fucking wallflower all night, got it?â He doesnât give you a chance to respond before heâs stomping off. He calls out a warm greeting to someone across the room and you feel like you can finally breathe again.Â
You give Logan a tired smile and nod towards the rest of the party. âTime to mingle.â
He laughs, loudly, enough to make peopleâs heads turn. You can feel your skin heating up from embarrassment and flinch away from the sound. âSorry, kid, mingling ainât part of my contract.â
Your jaw drops as you glare at him. âAre you serious?â
He turns back to the bar, flagging down the bartender for a refill. âDeadly,â he tells you firmly, barely looking at you. You roll your eyes and walk away from him, glaring at his back the whole time you do so.Â
He thought coming to one of these things, being stuffed in a scratchy suit, would be his worst nightmare. He was proven wrong when he heard them talking to each other. Bitching about golf and their mistresses wanting more attention. Their kids nagging them and their wives being bitches.Â
All of it made him want to down a whole bottle of whiskey and then blow his brains out. His worst nightmare turned into ever having to hold a conversation with one of these pricks.Â
Then, he turns around, surveying the room for wherever you were lurking. He expects you to be by your fatherâs side or hiding somewhere in a corner. Instead, youâre standing close -extremely close - to some pretty boy.Â
His hand is on your waist and youâre laughing at whatever boring fucking story heâs telling you. Logan tries to pick up on your conversation but there are too many things happening at once already. His senses are on overdrive and heâs already struggling against a migraine.Â
He feels something brewing in his gut, something heâs been trying to just shove down for months. He doesnât know what it is he hates about this picture but it makes him sick to his stomach. He hears something crack and looks down to find the glass of whiskey split on one side.Â
âShit,â he hisses, slamming the glass on the bar behind him. He shakes his hand out and tries to unclench his fists but itâs hard. He couldnât have possibly been standing here long enough for you to suddenly find the love of your life. Why the fuck are the two of you so close?
This was so unlike you. Rarely did you ever have something good to say about the men you would encounter at these things. Heâd heard you bitch about it enough times. Something about this isnât adding up and he doesnât know if itâs his own jealousy or intuition.Â
Still, he finds himself pushing away from the bar and stalking towards you both. Closer, he can finally see what the problem is. Your hands are on the guy's chest but you arenât leaning against him, youâre actively trying to push him away.Â
It makes Loganâs blood boil, jaw clenching as he tries to keep himself at bay. He didnât want to cave some kidâs head in in the middle of the gala. But the closer he got the clearer he could hear your hissed warnings to take his hands off of you.Â
Logan finally reaches you and the look of sheer relief on your face makes him want to bring the claws out. Heâd love to see that smug smirk ripped off his face, but he holds back. If only so he doesnât traumatize you.Â
âAlright, bub, hands off,â he warns.Â
âWhy donât you just leave us alone?â He had to give it to the kid, heâs got balls. Rarely did anyone ever buck up to him like this. Normally, he might entertain him a bit, drag this on longer than necessary to get a kick out of it.Â
But he still hasnât taken his hands off of you and Loganâs not interested in fucking around tonight. Without a word, he grabs the kid by the collar of his jacket and tosses him away from you.Â
He lands roughly on the floor with a loud gasp and people turn to look. Logan pays no mind to the onlookers. He places his hand on your back and leads you out of the ballroom, unwilling to have eyes on you for the rest of this conversation.Â
âLogan,â you start, tone nervous.Â
âDonât,â he snaps. He regrets it immediately from the way you jump in surprise. He lets out a rough sigh, running his hand down his face, and walks through the first door he finds. âIâm sorry, kid, I just-â
âLogan,â you cut him off. The tone of your voice is enough to get him to finally look at you. Your arms are crossed and youâre glaring at him. âWhy the fuck did you drag us into a closet?â
His brows furrow in confusion and he glances around, finally realizing what he walked into, âFuck,â he hisses. He gropes blindly around the room for a light switch. Thereâs a small click and then an unflattering fluorescent light is shining down on you both. Heâs managed to drag you both into a small, incredibly cramped, cleaning closet. Â
Youâre grimacing as you push a few mops away from your head. You look over at him and something about the look on his face must be funny because you start to laugh. âWhat were you thinking?â
Your smile makes one curl up on his own lips. He canât help it, something about you eases a bit of the tightness constantly lurking inside him. âThought it was one of those stuffy conference rooms.â
You scoff and reach for the handle, âJust a stuffy closest, good going, Logan.â You roll your eyes and tug on the knob. Your brows furrow together as you jiggle the handle every which way, desperately pulling on it.Â
âMove over,â Logan mutters, nudging you to the side. He wraps his hand around the handle and yanks on it, expecting the door to swing open. When it doesnât his face falls.Â
âDid you miraculously unlock it, genius?â You demand sarcastically. Logan feels his shoulders tense up, frustration levels steadily rising. Heâs already got a shit temper, he doesnât need you adding to this.Â
âNo,â he snipes, âbut I donât see you coming up with any wonderful solutions.â
You throw your hands up in the air, wincing when your elbow collides with the shelving unit behind you. âI didnât drag us into this mess! Why did you even come in here?â You demand and he can see how angry you are.Â
It shows in the way you tapped your heeled feet against the floor and glower at him like heâs the bane of your existence. He doesnât know what happens, what comes over him, or why this is the moment he chooses to break his rule.Â
Your back slams into the shelves behind you and you gasp as he surges towards you. His hands come up to cup your cheeks and before you get a chance to question him, his mouth is covering your own. Logan buries his hand in your hair, ruining the perfectly styled curls. You donât seem to mind much if the way you arch into him is anything to go by.Â
His tongue runs across the seam of your lips, tasting the cherry-flavored gloss youâd applied earlier. He wants to devour you. Consume you body and soul, take everything you have to give, and then keep going. He doesnât want to stop, but heâs not sure he wants the first place you have sex to be in a janitorâs closet.Â
He pulls back, tugging you back when you try to chase his lips with your own. âShouldnât do this here,â he mutters. Heâs struggling to hold back. And when you look up at him, lips swollen from his kiss, and you mutter why, how is he meant to resist?
He tugs you away from the shelves, pushing you against the door so he doesnât have to see your face twist up in pain every time the corner digs into your lower back. Your hands drop down to his belt, lips desperately carving a path down his neck.Â
Heâd laugh at your eagerness if he wasnât just as desperate for you. He reaches for the hem of your dress but itâs one of those floor-length gowns with no slits. He struggled for a minute before getting too impatient and just muttering, âFuck it.â
You gasp when you feel the metal of his claw against your leg, eyes dropping down to watch as he makes himself a slit. He slices the fabric along your thigh and then just rips it. âLogan,â you hiss as he hikes the silk over your hips.Â
âSomething wrong, sweetheart?â You glare at him, eyes darting between him and his pants before you finally shake your head. He laughs slightly, hand drifting under your dress and reveling in the way you shiver under his touch. âYeah,â he whispers, âthatâs what I thought.â
His fingers move gently along your thighs, easing you into his touch. You let out breathy whimpers, tucking your face in his neck the closer he gets to your core. He lets his hand drift lower, searching out the band of your underwear.Â
Heâs pleasantly surprised when heâs met with nothing but you dripping for him. âShit, youâre not wearing any underwear?â
You freeze and keep your face stubbornly buried in his neck. Logan laughs slightly, tugging you back and forcing you to look up at him. You mumble something under your breath. Itâs said so quickly he can barely understand you. âWhat was that?â
âUgh, god, Logan.â You groan and let your eyes drop down to his shirt, fiddling with the end of his tie. âI was hoping this would happen.â
When he doesnât say anything your face shifts, worry gnawing away at you. You glance up at him and are surprised by the intensity of his gaze. Heâs staring down at you like he wants to eat you whole. His pupils have consumed all the color of his eyes, thereâs nothing but want on his face.Â
âYou wanna know why I agreed to come with you, kid?â
Your mind is completely dulled just by being this close to him. It takes you a moment to process what heâs saying before you nod your head. âWhy?â
The look on his face reminds you of a wolf guarding its territory. Itâs predatorial, animalistic, it makes you want him even more. âI didnât want any of these little boys getting a chance to have their hands on you.â His gaze drops down to your lips and he leans in until your breaths are mingling together.Â
âYou have no idea how long Iâve wanted you.â He dips his head down and his kiss isnât as intense as it was the first time. His lips move lazily over your own, tongue stroking against yours like heâs savoring the taste.Â
You can taste the whiskey heâd drank earlier, can still smell cigars on his breath. It should be revolting, youâve never liked kissing smokers. But there is something so intoxicating about him. Everything he does is enchanting to you.Â
Itâs a naive train of thought but you trust him wholly. He could do whatever he wanted to you and youâd let him willingly. His hands continue their exploration down your body and you canât help but arch into his touch. His fingers stroke languidly over your center and you moan into his mouth.Â
Your lips part with little gasps and your head thunks loudly against the door. Neither of you notice or care, youâve all but forgotten the gala outside. The government employees and rich socialites that youâre supposed to be entertaining.Â
And when he slips a finger inside you, you donât care who hears you call out his name. The rough pad of his finger creates a feeling youâve never been able to produce on your own. Thereâs something so exhilarating about this whole situation.Â
Stuck in this tiny closet, no air to breathe but each otherâs. No room for anything other than your bodies pressed as closely together as possible. You're completely surrounded by him and you never want to leave.Â
âLogan,â you gasp out his name and shove at his shoulders. He momentarily stops his ministrations, giving you a worried look. âPlease, I just want you.â You tug at his wrist, hissing when his fingers leave you with a lewd pop.Â
He looks hesitant, but you can see the way heâs straining against his boxers. You let your hand trail down his stomach, palming him through the thin fabric. His hips buck into your hands and he lets out the most attractive noise youâve ever heard. Youâve always liked guys who arenât afraid to be vocal.Â
âFuck, youâre gonna be the death of me,â he whispers. He swats your hands to the sides, tugging his boxers down and squeezing your hips hard enough to bruise. âCome on, up.â
You jump and he slings your legs around his waist, lining himself up with your entrance. He drags you slowly down his cock, resting your back against the door and giving a hesitant thrust inside you.Â
You canât help the low groan that leaves your parted lips. Itâs like youâre full of nothing but him. Youâd been mentally prepared for the stretch he would present, but you probably should have given him more time to warn you up.Â
You donât care though, this is all youâve been craving for months. To feel nothing, taste nothing but him. Youâve been praying that he feels the same way you do, and if the look on his face is anything to go by, he does.Â
He looks completely wrecked, head resting on your shoulder while you both take a breath. Itâs overwhelming, this feeling of finally having what youâve always wanted. Someone you can give yourself to completely and still feel safe with them.Â
You drag your hand up his back, burying it in his hair and reveling in how soft it is. You tug him back by the roots, tilting his neck until heâs forced to look at you. Your gaze drops to his reddened lips and you smile at the gloss youâve smeared across his chin.Â
âCome on, Logan, donât tell me youâre all talk.â
His eyes narrow but you can see the amusement swimming within them. âYouâre gonna regret that.â
âOh, yeah?â You goad, grinding your hips down against his and biting your lip hard enough to draw blood. Youâre trying not to make a noise, trying to make sure he doesnât see just how much heâs affecting you. But you can already feel your orgasm forming, itâs a low tingle in the tips of your toes, a burning hot desire rushing through your thighs as you clench around him.Â
âYeah,â he promises, thrusting sharply into you. This time the moan is forced out of you, your lips parting unbidden as you slump over him, burying your face in his neck. He doesnât waste any time, using your hips as handles to pump you over his cock like youâre nothing more than a toy.Â
The door rattles behind you, each thrust of his hips makes it shake in its frame. His hands fist the back of your dress, grip so tight you think it might tear. You donât care. He could rip it off of you and youâd walk outside naked right now.Â
You donât care what happens, not when heâs beside you. Thereâs a feeling of security that comes from being around Logan and you can feel it in this moment. You trust him to take care of you in every way.Â
Maybe you shouldnât. After all, you two havenât known each other long. But thereâs not much youâre worried about when heâs moving steadily inside you. You can taste the desperation you share for each other in each pump of his hips.Â
He whispers it into your ear while you claw at his back. The shelves around you shake and you worry you might bring them down if you canât rope yourself in. But you can feel the wave building in the back of your throat, your vision blurring as you tighten your legs around his waist and begin to match his rhythm.Â
âThere you go,â he mutters, pinning you to the door and keeping your hips still while he moves inside you. âCome on, I can feel you clenching around me, sweetheart.â He manages to hold you up with one hand, the other diving between your legs to rub tight circles around your bundle of nerves.Â
It doesnât take much longer for your muscles to seize up, back bowing as you clench desperately around him. âOh, fuck, Logan,â you shout his name, and his hand quickly comes up to smother your cries. He squeezes your cheeks until your eyes snap open and he drags you down to meet his gaze.Â
âDonât want to lose my job, need you to be quiet for me,â he grunts out, his tone breathy and strained. He loses his rhythm, movements speeding up erratically while he lets out low groans and whispers of your name. You almost cum again when he finally finishes inside you.Â
Your limbs are twitching in overstimulation by the time his hips still. You feel completely boneless, body slumped lazily in his arms. He wraps both arms around you, squeezing you a little before slowly lifting you off of him.Â
Itâs a relief of pressure when he pulls out. His cum leaks out of you, dribbling down your thighs and dripping onto the floor of the closest. Your face screws up at the feeling and you internally cringe. No condom was probably a stupid call.
But you donât really want to think about the repercussions right now. Not when heâs stroking your hair and rubbing a soothing hand down your back, waiting until you can form a coherent sentence before he lets you go. âAlright?â He asks, voice bordering on something smug.Â
âMhm,â you push away from him, legs shaky as you try and straighten out your dress. Itâs a loss cause, trying to hide what happened in here at all. Youâve got a tear going up to your hip and youâre pretty sure there are holes in the back. Loganâs tie is gone and you donât even remember taking that off. His shirt is completely wrinkled and your lip gloss has stained his face.Â
Youâve both got horrific sex hair and the room reeks of it. You donât know how you're going to sneak out of here. You still try and relax your hair, patting down the flyaways while Logan retucks his shirt.Â
Itâs silent between the two of you, heavy but not awkward. You donât think either of you knows what to say now that youâve physically acted on what you want. A sudden thought hits you, makes your heart clench painfully and your tongue ties up in your mouth.Â
Heâd confirmed that he wanted your body. That he desired you sexually. But you donât think he actually said anything about a real relationship. There would be problems, of course, your father for one would have a lot to say about it. But you donât care about that. You donât care about any of the consequences, you just want to be with him.Â
You open your mouth to ask him what he wants when the door swings open. Both you and Logan whip towards it. But where you look like a deer caught in the headlights he looks like the epitome of male pride.Â
Especially when he realizes it's your father on the other side. âDad-â You start, but you have no idea what you could even say. Your dress is in tatters and both you and Logan are still mussed up. Thereâs no hiding what happened here.Â
He doesnât let you finish, holding up his hand. His voice is eerily calm as he says, âI thought I heard something banging around in here.â
âYou did,â Logan scoffs, crossing his arms and glaring at your father. You feel your heart jump to your throat, staring over at him with a horrified look on your face. How could he think that was okay to say? It was so dismissive of what you believed had happened.Â
This was more than just a quickie in the dark to you. This meant something, but youâre seriously starting to doubt that it was the same for him as it was for you. And that just makes you feel like the stupid little girl everyone seems to believe you are.Â
Your father says your name but you canât bring yourself to meet his eye. âYouâre feeling sick,â he tells you, no room for argument. âYour date had to take you home. It was just too much too soon after the incident at the rally.â When you donât say anything he shouts out, âUnderstood?â That makes you jump.Â
âYes,â you clear your throat and face him. âYes, understood.â
Your father has made his stance on mutants clear. He hates them, despises them to their very being, and wishes he could kill every last one. And as much as you were raised with those ideas, they were never truly turned on you.
But heâs looking at you right now like he wishes you were never born. You feel like shit on his shoe. Something to be hidden away and buried. It makes your shoulders slump like a hundred pounds was just tossed onto your back.Â
You try to run past him but he jerks you back, fingers so tight around your bicep you feel the skin tear. You gasp in pain but donât say anything, too afraid to argue. âPut his jacket on, I wonât have you looking like a whore.â He releases you with a rough shove and storms off.Â
You can feel something burning at the back of your eyes. A moment later Logan drops his jacket over your shoulders, pulling you back into his chest and running his hands over your arms. âCome on, kid,â he mutters. Thereâs something resigned in his voice that makes your heart drop, âLetâs get you home.â
The walk through the lobby feels like youâre walking through a dream. Youâre not completely present for it, or the ride home. Your mind and your heart are warring and you feel like youâre going to be torn apart if you keep lingering on what just happened.Â
You just canât understand how you could go from having everything you wanted to feeling like the scum of the earth in less than two minutes. Logan doesnât speak as he drives you home. His knuckles are turning white around the steering wheel and youâre afraid to even try and start a conversation.Â
You donât want to hear him tell you that he didnât desire you past your body. You donât want to discover that youâre just another notch on his belt. He seems to do this a lot, sleep with the girls he guards. The idea of just being another job, another fun night, makes you absolutely disgusted with yourself.Â
When he pulls into the driveway of your house you both just sit in the car. Neither of you knows what to say. And the air between you is so thick with tension you feel like you could choke on it. You stare down at your hands, fingers fiddling with the ripped seams of your dress.Â
You pick at the threads and feel his stare on you. You canât do this. You canât deal with the possibility of rejection. Not after what happened between you and certainly not after what your father said.Â
You undo your seat belt and Logan watches as you go through the movements of getting up. His eyes never leave you and itâs like a physical caress, his stare. Normally it would make you warm inside, comforted by his presence. But right now all you can feel is the chill of where his cum has dried between your legs and the icy-hot stab of nausea in your gut.Â
You throw the door open and youâre nearly out when he calls out a quiet, âGoodnight.â
You donât look at him, you canât. You slam the door shut and walk silently to the front door of your house. You donât look back, donât respond, you just slip inside your house and finally let the weight of the night come crashing down on you.Â
You donât cry until you hear him pull out of the driveway.Â
Your father and stepmother usually stay at the hotel the night of a gala. Most nights you come home and enjoy the house to yourself for once. Tonight, youâre woken up by the front door slamming so hard your walls shake.Â
You can faintly hear your stepmotherâs voice trying to console your father. Sheâs muttering something to him you canât make out. You shoot out of bed, running to pull some sweatpants on. After youâd cried yourself out youâd taken a shower.Â
Youâve scrubbed your skin raw but you swear you can still smell him on you. You rush to your bedroom door, turning the knob quietly and slowly peeking your head outside. Your fatherâs at the bottom of the stairs, the second he spots your open door heâs screaming your name.Â
Your stomach twists painfully and you can feel panic starting to overwhelm you. Your hands shake and your legs are stiff as you slowly step into the hallway. Youâre a grown woman. You shouldnât feel like this because your dad is going to yell at you.Â
But heâs been so good at forcing you to rely on him. At forcing you to bend and break to fit his beliefs and mold. You donât know what to do if youâre not striving for his approval. And right now itâs very clear that heâs never been more disgusted by you.Â
If the look on his face isnât enough to twist the knife deeper, his words are. âI have never,â he screams at you. You take a step back, keeping the stairs between you, refusing to meet him in the middle. âBeen more embarrassed to call you my daughter. Do you have any idea how humiliating that was for me? Do you know how many people saw you being dragged outside like a fucking whore off the corner?â
You clench your eyes shut, turning your face away from him as the shame becomes a physical thing inside you. You can feel it making its way up your throat. Because heâs right. Tonight you were nothing more than a slut without any self-respect.Â
But youâre also pissed off. Youâre fucking enraged at yourself for being so stupid as to ever believe Logan wanted you for anything more than your body. You're mad at Logan for knowing how you feel about him and taking advantage of it. And youâre so fucking tired of doing everything you can to make your father proud and it never being enough.Â
âHave you ever once asked me what I want?â You raise your voice, screaming down at him with a ferocity that surprises even you. His eyes widen, frame trembling with unreleased rage. You plow through, not stopping because you know if you do, youâll never get this out. âNo, you havenât. Not once. Because you donât fucking love me! And it has taken me years to accept that, to finally realize that youâre incapable of loving anyone but yourself.â
You gasp, the noise wet and painful as something warm trickles down your cheek. You stare down at him with your eyes wide in realization. âItâs so clear to me now, I feel like an idiot for missing it for so long. You never loved me. Youâre incapable of it!âÂ
Youâre embarrassed at the way your voice cracks. As much as you want to pretend youâre stronger than him, not afraid of him. Thereâs still a little girl inside you who wonders why Daddy doesnât love you.Â
âI donât give a flying fuck what you want, Dad. I donât care what you want my life to look like or if I embarrassed you. Iâm glad I did, glad someone finally saw a sliver of the truth you try so desperately to hide-â
âEnough!â He shouts and it startles you so bad that you jump back, your abilities reacting and a vase behind you flying off the shelf. You duck as glass shatters across the stairs and floor. You glance at the scene with shocked eyes, looking down at your father to see that heâs not even a little bit surprised.Â
Instead, he just looks so deeply disappointed that it makes you shrink into yourself. The anger within you is extinguished in a second. He rubs his face, shaking his head and turning his back on you. âDad?â You call out, voice trembling.Â
âGo to your room,â he tells you quietly. âI donât want to look at you anymore.â You hover by the top of the stairs for a moment, not quite believing him yet. And when he realizes you're still there, that youâre not taking him seriously, he finally looks at you again.Â
âI wish every goddamn day that those doctors had just put you down. Iâd rather have a dead daughter than one like you.â
You stand there, stunned, even after the rest of the house has gone to bed. You clean up the pieces of glass while you try and swallow down your tears. Let the sharp edges dig into your skin and tear until you can feel any type of pain besides the one inside you.Â
A week of solitary confinement. Youâre surprised that you havenât just been kicked out of college. Youâre sure that your fatherâs many donations to the university are the only thing stopping your professors from dropping you from the class.Â
You donât care if they do or not, though. You never actually care about what you studied. Youâd just always hoped that it would be a way for you to escape the tight grip around your neck your dad has on you.Â
Youâve figured out that no matter how hard you fight, youâll never escape him. He hates you and yet, he canât let you go. Youâd laugh if you werenât busy wallowing in your depression.Â
Someone keeps leaving food by your door but you canât find it in yourself to be hungry. Youâll nibble on something, but you feel like youâre going to throw up when you so much as breathe the wrong way.Â
You havenât heard from Logan since that night. You knew your father would fire him the second he woke up. But youâd held out hope - foolishly - that he might still try and reach out to you. You have this childish image in your head of the prince coming to rescue the princess from the dragon.Â
But youâve been naive your whole life, you donât want to keep going down this road. You donât want to keep expecting the best of people and live your life in perpetual disappointment.Â
You havenât seen or spoken to your father since that night. Wordlessly, heâd banned you to your room. No oneâs said it, but you know youâre not allowed to come out. You donât know when heâs going to deem you useful again and drag you back out into the public eye.Â
Contrary to his belief, no one had seen you leave that night with Logan. You hadnât been in any tabloids or shitty news articles. Besides emotional estrangement from your father and losing the only guy youâve ever really liked, there were no consequences to your whorish behavior - as your father so lovingly puts it.Â
You roll over in your bed and picture yourself taking a shower. It feels like such a workout but you canât stand lying in your sweat and tears for much longer. With a long drawn-out groan, you throw yourself out of bed and enter the bathroom connected to your room.Â
You know youâll feel better afterward, but everything besides sleep sounds like too much work. Still, you force yourself inside and finally clean the grime of laying on your ass for a week off.Â
You walk naked through your room, making a beeline for your dresser. You feel a little better after washing yourself off and moisturizing. But not much. Physical health can only do so much for how you feel inside.Â
You hope this will blow over soon, youâre not sure how much longer you can take feeling so awful. You hate pitying yourself, and thatâs exactly what youâre doing right now. You huff irritatedly, digging around your drawers for your favorite shirt.Â
A hand clamps around your mouth, rough and big, yanking you back into a muscled chest and keeping you quiet. You still try and scream, hands clawing at the skin of their hand until you feel blood.Â
âFuck, quit that, would ya?â
Your erratic movements slowly come to a halt. You still feel your heart pounding against your chest, adrenaline warming your blood and making you feel like you're on fire from the inside out. But, you recognize the voice, recognize thereâs no danger to the situation.Â
That doesnât make you any less pissed off. When Logan is sure you wonât keep attacking him, he lets you go slowly. You immediately whirl around on him, uncaring that youâre still naked. Energy moves quickly through you, becoming a physical thing under your skin.Â
He smiles at you and you push the energy out, throwing him across your room. He flies into your bookshelf, crashing to the ground with a loud slam. âWhat the fuck are you doing?â You scream at him.Â
Thereâs no one home right now, luckily, or else you both would be screwed. He shakes his head off, brushing pieces of wood out of his hair and slowly getting to his feet. âWell, I was coming to say hi-â
âYou say hi by ambushing naked girls?â You interrupt, grabbing the clothes closest to you and pulling them on quickly.Â
Logan rolls his neck out and shrugs. âNo, that was just a plus,â he gives you that insufferable smirk and you want to scream.Â
This is the first time you see him in a week since you had sex together and your father officially disowned you. And this is what heâs leading with? Seriously? âYouâre a real fucking prince, Logan.â You shake your head with a scoff and glare at him.
He narrows his eyes, looking to be in disbelief at your attitude. âWhat happened?â You expect to hear irritation in his tone. Anger that youâre being such a bitch right now. Instead, he sounds concerned, like he can see right through you.Â
You hate that. You used to love having someone who could see past all the pretenses and walls, but it just hurts now. âNothing,â you tell him, unable to hold eye contact any longer. âLook,â you take in a deep breath, and your brows furrow in confusion. âHow the hell did you even get in here?â
Logan doesnât look like he wants to drop the topic just yet but he relents. He nods towards your window and you fix him with an astonished look. âI climbed, I didnât want your dad to risk seeing me on the security cameras out front.â
You feel suspicion brewing inside you, tone turning defensive. âLook, if you came here because you want to fuck again, I suggest you go find another girl. Iâm not interested anymore.â
âWell,â he scoffs, âI find that hard to believe.â How easily he just dismisses your words. Like they hold no real importance. It makes you want to scream. Instead, you just flick your wrist, throwing him into another wall. You donât know how youâre going to explain these holes in the wall to your father but you donât really care.Â
âEnough,â he snaps, brushing himself off and glaring at you. Your lips curl up in amusement, the first thing youâve felt besides anger and depression for the last week. âLook, I was coming here to get you the hell out, kid. Clearly, Iâm not wanted.â
He walks towards your window, intent on climbing back down the side of your house and leaving. You almost let him, if only to see him scurrying down the wall. Instead, you take a step forward and stop him with a small, âGet me out?â
He sighs, running an aggrieved hand over his face and propping the other on his hip. âYeah,â he mutters. âLook, I canât stand the thought of you cooped up in here, isolated from the rest of the world. Itâs not fair, I was gonna see if youâŠâ He trails off and roughly swallows.Â
Your interest piques. Whatever is this hard for him to get out has to be interesting. âLogan,â you call his name softly. âSee if I what?â
He huffs out a rough breath, turning around and staring you down. Thereâs something in his eyes, something reflected in yours. Heâs looking at you the same way you always look at him. âYou wanna come with me, kid?â
Well, youâd have to be an idiot to say no.Â
You donât leave a note. You donât give them any clues or hints as to where you might have gone. They can draw their own conclusions about what happened to you. They can tell the news whatever twisted lies they want.Â
You donât care, thatâs not your life anymore. Your life is packed away in a backpack in the back of Loganâs trailer. Your new life is in the passenger seat beside him. Youâre equal parts terrified and excited to figure out what youâre going to do with the rest of it.Â
a/n: can you tell I know fuck all about politics?
Also, smut, wow, this was hard and rough to write. I donât know why itâs such a struggle. I just feel guilty writing such dirty words, itâs absolutely diabolical that I have no problem being crazy over a guy whose age gap with me is the same age as my parents, but I canât write smut.
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1spâĄ
The 'Worst' Logan x fem!mutant!reader
a/n: really wanted to write for the worst logan so I found a streaming site so I could finally watch the new Deadpool movie (yay pirating) (this is totally hypothetical and a joke to the feds lurking) I was going to just read the wiki plot but I donât think that was going to cut it Again, using the same superhero name/powers. Itâs not an OC I swear, it just makes sense in comic book movies to have some alternate name and Iâm not creative enough to come up with multiple different supe names. Summary: You hate him, you really fucking hate him at first. Heâs cruel and constantly reminds you that youâll never be the hero he knew. Youâre not her and heâs made that abundantly clear. But what are you supposed to do when heâs suddenly your new roommate and you have no choice but to wake up to his face every day? I feel sad because I donât think I did the angst justice with this one. But if I keep staring at it trying to fix it, then Iâm never going to post it. (This is a long one guys) Angst with a happy ending (because Iâm a little bitch) Makeout scenes and smut towards the very end 18+ MDNI
You donât know how you got here, but you know youâre mad at whoever dragged you into this shit. You donât think it would be wild to assume it was Wadeâs fault. Usually, when something goes wrong in your life itâs on him.Â
What you do know; you look like shit. Wade and Wolverine are both standing over you in their awesome ass uniforms and youâre still in your fucking pajamas. How are you supposed to be badass and save the world in pants that have Spidermanâs face plastered all over them?
âIâm gonna fucking kill you, Wade,â you growl at him.Â
He places his hand daintily on his chest and waves you off, âSave that for the bedroom, pookie.â
You grit your teeth and glare up at him, Wolverine gives him a similarly disgusted look. âFuckinâ ridiculous,â you grumble under your breath. You get to your feet and brush yourself off, finally looking around and taking in wherever the fuck heâs dragged you. âWhere are we?â
âThe void,â Wade responds, voice ridiculously dramatic. You look around and throw your hands up in defeat.Â
âWhat the fuck, Wade? Why did you drag me with you into this?â You look over at the Wolverine beside him. He hasnât stopped glaring at you both and his claws are out, clearly ready to just eviscerate you. âWho the fuck is this?â
âOkay, wow, language, Flux. Iâm disappointed in you.â
âEat me-â
Youâre cut off by the knock-off Wolverine standing a few feet behind you both. âFlux?â He demands, voice so low you almost canât hear him. Both you and Wadeâs heads whip around to face him. Thus far heâs been relatively silent, you nearly started to wonder if he was mute.Â
âItâs her X-Man name,â Wade tells him, gushing like itâs some big deal. âImpressive, huh?â You donât bother correcting him that it was your X-Men name. Canât exactly call yourself that if they booted you off the team for being a crappy superhero.Â
Logan snorts and shakes his head. He stalks towards you and you nearly fall over in your attempt to scramble back from him. âYou,â he demands, claws pointed at you threateningly. âYouâre Flux?â
Wade hisses, watching as Logan swipes out at you. âAlright, peanut, letâs put the claws away and take a deep grounding breath.â
âShut the fuck up,â Logan snaps at Wade. He turns to glare at him and you take the opportunity to scramble behind your friend for protection. At least if he gets stabbed, heâll heal. âYou,â he scoffs and it trails off into a laugh. Thereâs no humor behind it, he's just a dick. âYou are a fucking joke compared to my Flux.â
The ground underneath you rattles, pebbles bouncing off the cracked desert and ricocheting off their boots. Wade quickly moves away from you, shoving you forward so heâs not in the line of fire. âYeah, well youâre just an alcoholic fuck who could never hold a candle to my Logan.âÂ
You can feel energy brewing at the tips of your fingers, waves, and waves of hate building up within you. The man across from you feels the shift, the static suddenly permeating the air around you both. You let your power build and buildâŠ
The pebbles drop back to the ground and you stumble back from Logan, nose bleeding from overextending yourself. âShit,â you mutter, wiping at your face with the back of your hand and shaking your head.Â
Logan laughs again, it echoes through the stormy sky and you wish you had any control over your powers so you could just send him flying. Or, better yet, turn his bones into liquid and flip him inside out. âOh,â he lets out a long exhale, glaring at both of you. âThis is fuckinâ ridiculous.â The faux smile drops from his face and he raises his voice just loud enough to make you jump, âJust one big fuckinâ joke!â
You have about five seconds to dive to the side before Logan is lunging at Wade. âWait, wait, wait we can talk about this!â Wade shouts, but itâs too late, heâs already on the ground getting his head caved in.Â
You let out a rough sigh, stumbling off to the side. Youâre drained from that shitshow of powers. You barely made a few rocks levitate and you feel like youâre going to pass out. You walk away from the two men and throw yourself on the ground, trying to reorient yourself while they fight like wild animals.Â
You can hear them in the background, stabbing and shooting like theyâre aiming to kill. Too bad neither of them can die. Itâd save you a hell of a headache. They run past you, Loganâs got his claws buried in Wadeâs gut while Wadeâs desperately firing off his gun into Loganâs chest.Â
Your head rolls weakly to the side and you mutter out a pathetic, âNo, stop. Donât kill each other.â As expected, neither of them listens to you. They keep fighting, showing no signs of stopping.Â
Thereâs a moment of silence after about ten minutes of nothing but grunts and insults. You peak your head up in interest. Logan got his claws posed over Wadeâs throat. You wonder if decapitation would actually kill him or if heâd somehow manage to survive that.Â
Wade doesnât seem interested in testing out the theory, âThey can fix it!â Wade shouts, âThey can fix your timeline. I just need your help saving mine.â
Your eyes widen and you meet Wadeâs masked gaze over Loganâs shoulders. The white slits widen and he minutely shakes his head, telling you not to say anything. Like, maybe, that neither of you has any fucking clue if the TVA is capable of even fixing timelines like that.Â
You know Wade is desperate when he makes that promise. Itâs the only reason he would say something so stupid. Itâs a blatant lie, one pulled so far out of Wadeâs ass youâre genuinely surprised that Logan canât smell the bullshit. Whatever happened in his universe must have been horrible for him to ever believe anything that comes out of any Deadpoolâs mouth.Â
Itâs a long moment before Logan finally pulls his claws out of Wade. Your friend slumps forward in relief as Logan stalks away from him. You glare at Wade from where you are on the ground, âThat was fucking stupid,â you snipe at him. He gets to his feet, walks over to you, and forcefully yanks you to your feet.Â
âNot a goddamn word,â he warns, but you arenât exactly threatened by him when he's got three holes in his head from Loganâs claws. Still, you hold your hands up and acquiesce, following after him as he chases down Logan.Â
Your mind is still fuzzy when you are captured by Cassandra. You're recovering from overextending yourself, eyes blurring and limbs going limp like jello when her army of henchmen circle you all.Â
You finally feel yourself starting to come back to your body when you wake up tied to Johnny. âAnd,â Wade draws the word out, waiting until you lift your head to finish, âthere she is! Happy you could join us, princess. Mind turning these ropes into dust for me?â
You groan and let your head slump onto Johnnyâs shoulder. He smirks and glances down at you. âOh fuck off, both of you. I canât do shit right now and you know it, Wade, Iâm drained.âÂ
Logan is glaring at you, but thereâs less hate in his glare and more confusion now. âCan you do anything?â
You narrow your eyes at him, lips screwed up while you try to decide if heâs being an asshole or genuine. âHard of hearing or something old man? Iâm drained,â you reiterate, your tone a little too bitchy.Â
Logan narrows his eyes, grunting something foul under his breath. Wade interferes before you can piss each other off anymore. âShe had an accident, her brainâs a little broken now. But itâs fine! Whose isnât?â
You huff and throw yourself back against the cage youâre all being transported in. You feel eyes on the side of your head and slowly look over to see Johnny grinning at you. âHey, you know Iâve met one of your variants-â
âDonât give a fuck,â you interrupt. You hear Wade snicker under his mask, giving you an encouraging thumbs up even with his hands bound. You were both a little disappointed it wasnât Captain America lurking under that cloak. But at least this guy isnât such a prude he wonât cuss.Â
For the next five minutes, youâre on the receiving end of a very enthusiastically vulgar rant about just what a cunt Cassandra Nova is. Heâs still not even finished by the time you reach the gates to her lair.
Your eyes widen when you see all the people lurking around the walls. Most of them you recognize as people youâve put away or killed in your world. But thereâs something just minutely different about them than the version you faced in your timeline. Their eye color or outfit is always just slightly off.Â
The familiar faces are almost a relief. But there is nothing comforting about knowing you're outnumbered two hundred to four. The cage is tipped over and you go rolling out, you grunt as Johnnyâs elbow digs into your ribs.Â
Before you can even attempt to shove him off, the ropes are whipped off of you and youâre dragged by an invisible force across the ground. Rocks and sand scrape across your tender skin and bury themselves deep in your pores. You hiss in pain when you finally come to a stop and your body is your own again.Â
A groan slips through your parted lips unbidden as you struggle onto your knees. Your pajamas are ripped practically everywhere and you feel like you might as well be naked at this point. You really wished that you at least had a chance to change before you were kidnapped to another universe.Â
The woman you presume to be Cassandra Nova is currently fucking Wadeâs skull with her freakish telepathy fingers. Johnnyâs a pile of guts and bones on the floor and you have no fucking clue where she flung Logan to.Â
You get to your feet, shaking your head and reorienting yourself. In a second sheâs in front of you, head tilted to the side while she regards you curiously. âWoah,â you jump back, glaring at her outstretched hand.Â
âCareful,â Wade warns her breathlessly, still clutching his head. âFlux here has a pathological fear of bald people.â
You nod, âItâs true, you can imagine how strained my relationship with your brother was.â Cassandra circles you, a devious tilt to her lips. Your eyes track her, unwilling to take your gaze off her for even a second. You feel like a rabbit, facing down a fox thatâs made its way into your burrow.Â
âCurious,â she mutters. âIâve seen quite a few of you down here before. But,â she chuckles and before you can move her hand is shoving its way into your brain. You scream, thereâs an agonizing burn as her fingers probe under your eyes and dig through the deepest part of your subconscious. It feels like someoneâs taking a shovel and ripping up your worst traumas. âNone of them have been so weak.â
Wonderful, even she wants to insult you. You can feel the way sheâs plucking through your thoughts, tossing aside the ones she doesnât like. Images of your childhood are flashing across your vision. You can no longer see the world around you, itâs like every one of your worst memories is being played on a projector.Â
âAh,â she clicks her tongue and jerks your neck around until youâre looking at something youâve tried to forget for years. âHere it is. How easy it would be for me to simply unblock those powers of yours.â She smiles, her face appearing before you and blocking out the bloodshed. âIt would make this far more entertaining for me, what do you say?â
Your teeth are clenched so tightly youâre surprised they havenât cracked yet. Itâs hard to get the words out when her fingers are still dancing through your skull. âFuck you,â you finally spit out. She releases you suddenly, and you surge forward with a gasp, clutching at your skull desperately.Â
You half expect your brains to begin leaking from your nose and eyes. But nothing happens, despite feeling incredibly violated, everything is still in its proper place. Cassandra walks past you like everything is fine and dandy in the world. âWell, as much as I would love to see those powers of yours in action again, Flux, Iâm afraid Alioth must eat.â
Before you can ask what she's talking about thereâs a loud rumble. Like thunder cracking through the sky and land, the ground underneath you shakes. Cracks form under your feet and the henchmen around you all start desperately racing for cover.Â
You turn around, staring wide-eyed at the purple cloud of death and destruction steadily moving across the sky. A face breaks through the clouds, grinning down at you. Purple lightning hits the ground and the villain next to you explodes into nothing but dust.Â
âShit!â You shout, turning around and running to try and avoid getting zapped up next. Thereâs no coming back from this one. Once this monster gets you, not even god could save you.Â
Suddenly, an arm wraps around your waist, lifting you off your feet. âNo time for consent, weâve got to get the fuck outta here!â Wade shouts in your ear. Logan is standing next to some robot leg, ripping out cords until a jet on the back fires up. Wade leaps onto the boot, wrapping an arm around Loganâs legs as youâre all shot into the sky.Â
Youâd scream if you werenât trying not to throw up. You hurtle through the sky at speeds that have your skin nearly ripping off your skull. The rocket on the back of the leg starts to sputter out. The flames flickering out and then back to life. It steadily begins to drop until youâre plummeting headfirst towards the ground.Â
Wade wraps himself around you, tossing himself off the boot so he can brace your fall. You hear and feel nearly all of his bones break under your weight. For a moment it feels like youâre laying on warm jello as you try and catch your breath.Â
âNailed it,â he mutters weakly. Youâre pretty sure he canât breathe, a rib having pierced his lung in the fall. A shadow looms over you and you glance up to find Logan glaring down at you. You stare at him apprehensively, half expecting him to unsheathe his claws and just end you right here.Â
Instead, to your surprise, he holds a hand out. You look at it with suspicion, glaring back up at him. âFucks sake,â he mutters. He reaches down, roughly grabbing your hand and jerking you to your feet. You feel the warmth of Wadeâs blood on your back and grimace.Â
âThanks,â you mutter, still not entirely trusting of him.Â
He purses his lips into a thin line, backing awkwardly away from you. He just nods and starts surveying the land around you. It feels less like trying to figure out where you all landed and more like awkwardly avoiding eye contact.Â
The whole interaction leaves you feeling odd. âWell, that was as awkward as two virgins on prom night,â Wade loudly announces as he jumps to his feet. You whip around and send him a dirty look but his attention has already been snagged by something else. Lately, youâve been considering grounding up Adderall and slipping it into his breakfast, you think it might do him some good.Â
Whatâs got to be the fugliest dog youâve ever seen in your life bounds towards Wade. He drops to his knees, ripping off his mask and opening his arms wide to the mutt. You grimace, taking a step back when she starts licking his face. âOh, thatâs just wrong.â
Thankfully dogless, you steal Nicepoolâs Honda Odyssey - much to Wadeâs chagrin. Loganâs in the front seat, Wade beside him. Youâre sitting in the back, rubbing your temples and trying to get rid of the raging migraine youâve had since Cassandra finger blasted your brain.Â
Youâve been zoning in and out of the conversation happening in the front seat of the car. But Logan suddenly slams on the brakes and you go hurtling forward. Without even looking at you, both their arms shoot out, blocking you from flying through the windshield.Â
Your face scrunches up as you look at both their arms, it feels like being saved by an overbearing soccer mom. âBuckle up, princess,â Wade tells you. He shoves you back into your seat and you look between the two men suspiciously.Â
âDid you just say if?â Logan growls, glaring at Wade. Your face drops, finally realizing what youâd missed.Â
Wade lets out a weak chuckle, âSlip of the tongue?â Logan growls and the claws come out. Wade raises his hands, âOkay, letâs put a brake on the crazy train. I wasnât lying it was just an educated,â for the first time in your friendship Wade is actually speechless. Youâre shocked by the silence. Until, of course, he runs his mouth again and comes up with the lamest cop-out youâve ever heard. âIt was an educated wish that they could fix your timeline, alright?â
Logan doesnât give much of a warning except a low growl before he shoves his claws deep into Wadeâs thigh. âYou motherfucker!â
âHey!â You shout, jumping forward and ripping Loganâs claws out of Wadeâs leg. âLook, weâre trying to save our whole fucking universe. Can you blame him for lying?â You regret opening your mouth pretty much immediately.Â
You should have just stayed out of this, it wasnât any of your business. And if they wanted to be two dumbasses and fucking tear each other apart then so be it. But you never should have drawn attention to yourself.Â
âShut the fuck up,â Logan shouts at you. Itâs so startling, coming from him. Youâre still associating him with the man youâd looked up to growing up. Your Wolverine was a hero. He was the reason you wanted to be an X-Man. And they look exactly the same, itâs nearly impossible for you to separate this one from the one you knew.Â
But it's easier now. Because the man youâd known would never be so cruel and jaded to the world. Not like this. âWhy the fuck are you even here? Youâre just some watered-down knockoff of a real hero. You are nothing, youâre worth nothing. Itâs a fucking joke that youâre alive and the woman I knew is buried six feet deep. If there was anything right in the world you would be in a grave somewhere crawling with maggots.â
Your eyes water without your permission. You donât know this man. Yet, he has the face of your greatest hero and the man who youâd grown up hearing stories about. Itâs like facing everything youâve ever wanted to be and having it shout your deepest fears and insecurities back at you. Heâs just confirming something youâve known for years. You never deserved the title of being an X-Man. You never deserved the uniform or anything that came with it.Â
Your breaths are coming short and fast, it feels like your lungs are constricting. You worry you wonât be able to get air in but he doesnât care. No, he keeps going. âYou follow this fucking clown around and you contribute nothing to the world. Youâre never gonna save your fucking timeline. You canât even make a few rocks float.â Itâs not the words that hurt you next. Itâs the way he says it. âYouâre pathetic.â
He spits them at you. Thereâs venom lacing his tone like heâs seen into you and knows thereâs nothing in you to offer. For the first time in a long time, you feel seen and you hate it. Because heâs looking past the sarcasm and the faux confidence you carry yourself with.Â
He sees the empty husk of a woman you truly are and heâs forcing you to face it with him. It causes you physical pain, to know that everything youâve ever feared about yourself is true. You donât have anything to say to him, you canât.Â
Your lips tremble and you feel so fucking small. You can hear your parent's voices in your head, screaming at you and wishing you were never born. Theyâd rather have a stillborn than a fucked up mutant for a daughter. You see the way even other kids at the school would hide from you. You were made wrong, even as a mutant you were never truly accepted.Â
Loganâs face drops ever so slightly at the prolonged silence in the car. Even Wade isnât speaking, heâs just staring at you both. âI,â he starts, but Wade cuts him off.Â
âIâm gonna hurt you now.â Wadeâs never been one to let people run over you, even when you might just let yourself fall into the background. You shouldnât be surprised when he draws a knife and stabs it into Loganâs throat.Â
But the arterial spray that follows catches you off guard and suddenly your tears are dried. Instead, youâre throwing open the car door and diving out before one of them crushes you. You make it out of the car just in time, Logan having thrown Wade right where you had been sitting.Â
Music starts up in the car as a result of their fighting. Divorced dad rock and the sounds of their, borderline, sexual grunting are your soundtrack for the rest of the night. You curl up at the base of a tree, waiting for them to be done with each other.Â
Loganâs words continue to echo through your head. And the longer you linger on what he said the angrier you get. Not necessarily at him, but at yourself. Youâve let yourself linger in self-pity and wallow in regret for so long.Â
You look in the mirror and you no longer recognize yourself. Heâs right, as much as you hate to admit it, youâre a fucking joke. You toss your head back, slamming it against the trunk of the tree hard enough for it to hurt.Â
Thereâs this manic, cloying feeling tugging at your chest. Itâs like someoneâs sitting on your ribs, crushing you until you canât breathe anymore. You keep throwing your head back, letting the pain distract you until you feel warm blood leaking down the back of your scalp.Â
âShit,â you hiss, hand coming up to cradle the back of your skull. You wince when you feel the split in your skin. The blood leaks over the tips of your fingers, running through the cracks of your palm.Â
You force yourself to relax, to move your head away from the tree. As you go to stand up, possibly to get Wade and Logan to quit their fighting, you notice something odd. The air around you is still, you can no longer hear them grunting or groaning as they rock the Honda.Â
Leaves are suspended in the air. Theyâre not trembling from the breeze, theyâre completely frozen. You take a step forward and gasp when you hit something solid. The air in front of you has solidified somehow.Â
The realization dawns on you slowly but surely. This is you, youâve done this. Manipulated everything around you on an atomic level. Youâve turned something you shouldnât be able to feel into something you can touch. Frozen the world around you. Whatever Cassandra had done inside your head, it had knocked something loose.Â
You havenât had this wide a range of control for years. Any attempt to do something like this has been met with nosebleeds and long periods of blacking out. Elation fills you, the hurt from earlier is nearly gone.Â
You glance through the wall of air and try to see if you can still see the Odyssey. To your horror, itâs gone. You wave your hands and the air returns to normal. The leaves drift back to the forest floor and you run back to where youâd left the two men.Â
There are tire tracks dug deep into the mud. You know Wade wouldnât willingly leave you behind, not here. You donât know if Loganâs just kidnapped him or if someone else has. Whoever was driving was clearly in a rush to get out of here.Â
You must have missed it all while you were having your meltdown. âFuck,â you shout, your voice echoing into the branches above. You take in a deep breath and start walking. Hopefully, you can catch up to them before whoever has them does serious damage.Â
You make it to a weird cave/hideout area. The Odyssey is parked outside and when you peek through the broken windows you find the interior completely destroyed. Thereâs blood soaking through every surface, anything and everything has been smashed and bent the wrong way.Â
You donât even know if this is from Wade and Logan or whoever had snatched them. Shaking your head you back up and slink towards the entrance of the den. You can hear shouting inside, it sounds like Wade, but you canât make out what heâs saying.Â
You havenât seen action for a long time. At least not any that you could actually contribute to. It feels a bit like riding a bike. Youâd practiced on your way here, making things around you float or eradicating a few trees into nothing but dust in the wind. But this is different.Â
Your friend (and Logan) are inside, possibly being tortured. Maybe even dead. Though, you seriously doubt the universe is going to be that nice to you. You let the energy build in your arms, itâs like a warm tingling feeling. It shoots down to the palms of your hands until you feel static in the air.Â
You take a step inside and spot three people. Each of them is decked out in weapons. One of them turns and spots you. âWho is-âÂ
You donât let him finish, throwing your hands out and slamming them all into the wall so hard the whole interior shakes. Dirt rains down from the ceilings while their faces contort in pain. You run inside, spotting Logan and Wade.Â
You shoot Wade a big grin but he throws his hands up and shouts, âRead the fucking room!â Your brows furrow and he points emphatically at the people youâre holding, âGood guys!â
âOh shit,â you release them immediately, a guilty look on your face. âI am so sorry.â Logan cackles in the back, doubled over laughing while the three people in front of you brush themselves off.Â
You donât want to be out here with him, but itâs better than being in that cave with the others. Laura walks past you, sending you an uneasy smile. Youâd noticed her sitting beside Logan and decided they probably needed a few moments to themselves.Â
They were finished now, though, and he had the only bottle of liquor left in the cave with him. You trudge over to him, leaves crunching under your boots. Elektra, after that horrific introduction, had given you a uniform a different Flux had left behind.Â
She was long gone, killed by Cassandra years ago, but sheâd conveniently been your exact size. The uniform is nearly identical to the one you have buried under your bed. Black leather with a dark purple X going across your chest and matching purple seams. Youâd never wanted something ridiculously flashy. Just something that people would see and associate with the X-Men.Â
Because thatâs all youâd ever wanted to be; a hero. It feels like a pipe dream now. If your pajamas werenât so destroyed you would have just stayed in them. You donât feel like you deserve this uniform, not when the woman whoâd worn it before you had actually been a hero in her timeline.Â
âDonât want company,â Logan snarks, without even looking back to see whoâs coming up to him.
You take a seat on the lawn chair closest to him and snatch the bottle of whiskey from his hands. âGood,â you tilt your head back, downing as much as possible. It burns the whole way and you revel in the slight tickle in the back of your throat.Â
âAlright,â Logan mutters. He gently takes the bottle back from you, giving you an aggrieved look when he sees just how much youâve stolen. He looks back into the fire and sighs, âLook, Iâm not interested in hearing about your sob story or why youâre suddenly drinking all my liquor-â
âGambitâs liquor,â you interrupt, not bothering to look at him. âAnd Iâm not looking to dump my sob story on your lap. I just want to sit in silence and thatâs impossible because Wade hasnât stopped running his mouth since we got here.â
He looks a little surprised by the brusque way you dismiss him, âAlright,â he mutters. He takes another swig from the bottle and you both stare silently into the fire. Itâs like that for a while, you donât bother keeping track of time.Â
All you hear is the crackling of the flames. All you can feel is the way your eyes burn from staring into the fire and watching sparks pop off the logs for too long. The breeze rustles the trees, makes the leaves shake free and dance around the logs of the fire.Â
He breaks the silence first, to your chagrin. âAbout what I said,â he clears his throat uncomfortably, still refusing to look at you, âback in the car.â
âDonât,â you snap, voice low. âJust,â you let out a long breath and shake your head. You finally look over and meet his eyes. He does actually look sorry, but you donât want to hear it. âJust donât, I deserved it all right.â
âNo, no you didnât.â You open your mouth to argue but he gives you a firm look that has your jaw snapping shut. âI was wrong, I donât know you. And if my Flux had ever heard me talking to you like that she would have melted my fucking spine.â He laughs a little and you feel your lips twitch up slightly. Itâs the first time youâve seen him look anything but angry.Â
Curiosity loosens your tongue and knocks you out of the dazed stupor youâve been in. âWhat was she like?â You ask, tone earnest. âYour Flux, I mean, you make her sound so amazing. I just canât,â you trail off, but the look on his face tells you he understands your unspoken words. I just canât see myself as a real hero.Â
He groans and leans back on the log heâs resting on. He stretches his legs out in front of him, the liquor bottle placed on the forest floor. Youâre surprised, you figured the thing was glued to his hand.Â
âWell,â he reaches up and scratches at the scruff of his chin, a wry grin on his face. âShe was always giving me shit, never let me get away with anything.â You unconsciously lean forward, drawn into the endearing way he begins to describe this other version of you.Â
Itâs not ridiculous to assume this variant meant something to him. Heâs got a shine to his eye that you havenât seen in the whole time youâve been together. His gaze has been empty, closed off to anything and everything. But now, his eyes are crinkling at the corners, thereâs an easy smile on his face that you canât miss.Â
âAh, she was fucking feisty. And strong, she was so strong. She was always a better hero than I was. She lived for that shit,â he trails off and shakes his head. You can see youâre losing him and you donât want this to end. Youâre in your own little bubble right now, getting to pretend thereâs a version of you out there somewhere that actually lived up to her potential.Â
âHer powers,â you blurt out, desperate for something to stop him from retreating back into his mind. âDid she have, um, good control over them?â
Logan nods, eyes darting down to the bottle of whiskey before flickering back up to meet your gaze again. âYeah, Charles trained her, she was right up there with Jean. She could have,â he stops and suddenly you feel guilty for making him talk about this. You can see the tears in the corner of his eyes, the way the whites of them go red. âShe could have been great.â
âIâm sorry,â you whisper, âI didnât mean to pry.â But you did. You were being selfish and forcing him to talk about it even though you knew it would hurt him.Â
âLook, kid, she would have liked you. Iâll tell you that much,â he says reluctantly. Like the words hurt to force out. You suppose he isnât used to being genuine with anyone.Â
You shake your head and look down at your hands. âI appreciate the thought, but I doubt it.â
Logan grabs the bottle again, gulping it down like it's water. His words have a slight slur to them as he speaks again. âI think I would know, bub. âSides, you made it into the X-Men, tells me what I need to know.â
You scoff and fix him with a sardonic look, he raises his brows in question and you roll your eyes. âTheyâll take fucking anybody. And I still wasnât good enough for them.â
Logan shakes his head and frowns. âIf what I saw in there,â he points back to the den and you feel your cheeks warm as you remember what youâd done, âis any indication, then Iâm sure you were plenty good.â
You lean towards him, elbows braced on your knees. He follows suit, leaning so close you almost want to back up. The proximity flusters you slightly but you shake the feeling off. âYou donât even know me and the first real thing you said to me was that Iâd be more useful as fertilizer.â
He sighs, face screwing up at your harsh words. He runs a hand over his cheeks and groans, âI didnât mean it like that.â
You lean back in your chair and idly twirl your hand through the air. The leaves around you lift up and flutter through the air above your head. Logan watches and you turn back to him, waiting until his eyes meet yours to speak again. âYes, you did. And you were right. Iâm fucking useless, powers or not.â The leaves drop, a few fluttering into the fire. âWeâre irrelevant, Wolverine, two washed-up X-Men who never looked good in the uniform.â
Thereâs a twinge of hurt on his face but you canât make yourself feel bad about it. Since heâs such a fan of brutal truth, youâre sure he can handle it.Â
You watch as the leaves curl up at the corners, the fire burning them straight through the middle. You get to your feet and move past him. Youâre nearly back to the den when he calls, âThe suit looks right on you,â over his shoulder.
You pause at the threshold of the door. Heâs already drinking again, staring into the fire and watching it burn. You take a few steps towards him, staring at his broad back. âWhat happened to her, your me?â
Logan looks down at his hands, his ring finger specifically. You wonder at the significance of the movement, what exactly youâd meant to him. âShe married me,â he mutters, voice cold and closed off again.Â
âGoodnight, Logan,â you whisper, finally walking inside the den.Â
You miss the small goodnight he sends back to you, finally turning around only to watch you leave.Â
There had been a very clear plan set in place. Get Juggernautâs helmet, put it on Cassandra, and then kill that psychotic bitch. Which is why youâre so confused when youâre standing knee-deep in guts and watching Logan and Wade leap through a portal above you.Â
You donât have time to feel angry or even hurt that they left without you. Laura is grabbing your arm and youâre both running for your life, trying to escape Alioth again. You run into Cassandraâs lair ducking into one of the rooms and dragging Laura with you.Â
Youâre both holding your breaths and praying that heâs sated by the others still outside. After a few minutes, the cracks of thunder stop and you risk peeking your head outside. The clouds have retreated back to their usual spot in the middle of the void.Â
You take in the carnage of Cassandraâs evil lair. Most everybody is dead. You only have to skirt around a few people to get back to the Odyssey.Â
You throw yourself in the driverâs seat and sink back against the bloodstained cushions. You let out a relieved breath and look at Laura, âWhat do you do to entertain yourself around here?â
You acclimated to the idea of being stuck in the void pretty quickly. There wasnât exactly a lot waiting for you back home. Besides, Laura was nice enough. You had food, beer, and company. You didnât really need much else.Â
Youâre pretty sure if you linger too long on the thought that Wade left you behind youâll fall into a depression that youâre never going to be able to claw your way out of. So, you forced a smile on your face and played cards. Nothing else to do but wait to die of old age or for Alioth to kill you.Â
Of course, your plans had to be ruined. There was an odd rush of air against your back and then a slight whoosh. Laura glanced over your shoulders and her brows furrowed, you turned around to find three armored men waiting behind you.Â
âFlux,â the man glanced from you to Laura, âX-23?â
âLaura,â you both correct at the same time.Â
The man gives an aggrieved sigh and holds his arm out, âCome with me, please.â
You stand up, energy tingling in the palms of your hands while you regard them suspiciously. Laura comes up behind you, claws out and glaring at them. âWhy should we?â You demand.Â
Barely a second later you hear the most insufferable voice in the world. âHiya, peanut!âÂ
âWade,â you hiss. You follow the armored men through an oddly shaped portal and find Wade standing beside a shirtless Logan, smiling proudly at you. âYou fucking left me,â you hold up your hands and his eyes widen.Â
His hands quickly come up, trying to assuage you, âHold on now-â
You throw him back, his body hurtling into a nearby building and caving in the wall. Logan watches it happen with a small smile, âBeen wanting to do that for a while.âÂ
Once Wade had recovered he filled you in on everything that happened. TVA did a general clean up and then you were standing in front of your apartment door, keys in hand like nothing had happened.Â
It was so bizarre, going from a mission to save your timeline and then youâre expected to just go about your life. You stay standing in that hallway for you donât know how long before you hear someone behind you.Â
You jump and drop your keys when Logan clears his throat. âShit,â you hiss, whirling around and glaring at him while your heart races. He chuckles and bends over to grab your keys for you.Â
âSorry,â he mutters. This is the most relaxed youâve ever seen him, covered in blood and in a borrowed shirt. âUh, Wade doesnât have enough room at his place. Told me I should come over here.â
You look over his shoulder and see Wade peeking his head out of his doorway. He catches your eye, sending you a thumbs up. You almost smile but then he makes a phallic gesture with his hands, pointing at Logan and humping the air. You glare at him and he quickly backs into his apartment, but not before sending you one last encouraging shit-eating grin.Â
You look back at Logan and heâs waiting expectantly for your answer. âYeah,â you take your keys from him and unlock the door. âIâve got a spare room but thereâs no bed in it right now.â Your eyes widen when you see the mess that is your apartment.Â
You quickly rush through, picking up empty take-out boxes and dirty laundry and shoving them into your room. Heâs smiling at you when you come back and it's slightly off-putting. âUm,â you gesture towards the couch awkwardly. âYou can take the sofa tonight and weâll look at setting you up with something more permanent tomorrow.â
âThanks,â he hovers by the armrest and you engage in the longest stare-off of your life. Neither of you says anything for a few suffocating moments before he gestures at himself. âShower?â
âOh,â you snap out of your stupor and nod your head. âYeah, right, of course.â You show him down the hall, âHere. Iâll go get you a towel.â
You rush towards your linen closet, leaving him behind in your bathroom. You grab a few clean towels and then figure he might want some clothes as well. You grab some pajamas that Wadeâs left over when heâs crashed before. Theyâll probably be a bit tighter on Logan, but you wouldnât mind seeing that.Â
You walk back to the bathroom and the thought of knocking doesnât even run through your head. It should, honestly, but youâre already so thrown off by him even being here. You walk in and immediately gasp and drop the towels.Â
âOh, I'm sorry. Iâm so sorry.â Heâs standing naked before you. Clothes discarded on the floor behind him. Everything on perfect display. Your eyes land on his abs, noticing a few prominent veins leading down-
You cover your face and turn around. âSorry,â you mutter again. God, youâre such an idiot. You still havenât even left. Youâd just been shamelessly ogling the man naked and you donât even have the decency to walk out.Â
You really canât help it though. Itâs been such a clusterfuck, the last 72 hours. Your brain is fried and Wadeâs little show hasnât helped you at all. Â
You hear Logan laugh behind you. âItâs alright,â he mutters. Something warm ghosts across your arm and you jump slightly. His hand firmly grasps your bicep, gently tugging your palms away from your face.Â
You risk a glance over your shoulder and nearly gasp at how close heâs gotten. He's towering over you, something in his face you canât place. âItâs alright,â he whispers again and you find yourself nodding without really thinking.Â
Heâs got both hands on your arms now, trailing up and down. The touch is so featherlight you can barely feel it at all. You donât even realize how heâs gently coaxing you closer until you trip on the towels at your feet.Â
You startle, looking down at them and moving to kick them aside. But he stops you, his finger nudging your chip up so youâll look at him again. There is such blatant want painted across his face that it makes your heart skip a beat. Your breath catches in your throat when he wraps an arm around your waist and drags you closer.Â
You can feel all of him. You can feel just how much he wants you. It catches you off guard, this sudden display of attraction. You donât know where itâs coming from, whatâs brought it on. But you canât find it in yourself to care. Youâve been so lonely for so long. You just want to bask in the fact that he looks absolutely starved for you.Â
No man has ever looked at you with such heartbreakingly yearning eyes - like heâs been looking for you his whole life. He dips down, lips ghosting gently over yours. Your breaths mingle together, you can nearly taste him.Â
Itâs unclear which one of you moves first, who pushes closer to the other. But it doesnât matter because the second you put real pressure behind the kiss heâs all over you. One of his hands drifts down to your ass, squeezing the flesh there and dragging you closer, grinding his hips into yours.Â
You moan at the feeling, your arms wrap around his neck and you press yourself even closer. He groans against your lips at the first swipe of your tongue. You part with a gasp when he picks you up, practically tossing you onto your sink. Your legs spread instinctually, making room for him as he slots himself between them.Â
Itâs odd, feeling so vulnerable even when heâs the one who's completely naked. It still feels like heâs holding all the power.Â
His lips are moving frantically over yours like heâs terrified youâre going to disappear the second he lets go. You can taste something desperate on his tongue. Something deeply rooted inside him that you canât identify.Â
One of your hands drifts from his neck, trailing over the muscles of his chest. Your fingers carve a path down his abs, relishing in how muscular he feels under your palm. Your hand reaches his pelvis, nearly wrapped around him when he jumps back.Â
He grabs your wrist in a grip so tight you know thereâs going to be a bruise. A pained gasp slips out and he releases you immediately. âIâm sorry,â he mutters. âSorry, I canât.â He wonât look at you now, backing up towards the shower and shaking his head. âThis was a bad idea, I canât do this.â
You shake your head, slipping off the sink and hiding your bruised wrist behind your back. âNo, sorry, I shouldnât have moved so fast.â
You feel too ashamed to meet his eye. He kissed you but you feel like youâve forced yourself on him somehow. Itâs a nauseating feeling and you want nothing more than to run back to your room and hide.Â
He takes a step towards you, something pained on his face. âKid-â
You just shake your head, step out of the bathroom, and grab the handle of the door. âSorry,â you whisper again, closing the door behind you. You lean against the cool wood, trying to catch your breath.Â
Your hand drifts up to your lips, still tingling from how desperately heâd kissed you. It doesnât make any sense. He came on to you, he threw you up on the sink, and made out with you more passionately than any man ever has before. So why are you the one who feels dirty?
You rush down the hall and into your room, slamming the door behind you. You dive under your covers, closing your eyes even though you know you wonât sleep. No, your shoulders are tensed up to your ears and your bones are vibrating with an energy you need to release.Â
Youâre completely tuned into the other person lurking in your apartment. You can hear as he starts the shower, how he talks quietly to himself sometimes. Then when he gets out you can perfectly picture what he looks like while heâs getting dressed and it only makes you feel worse.Â
You listen as he leaves the bathroom and pauses in the hall. You can see it in your mindâs eye, how he stares at your door. He walks towards it and lingers for a minute before cussing quietly and heading back into the living room.Â
You suddenly remember that you didnât lay sheets out on the couch for him. You feel guilty, but thereâs not one part of you that will be dragged from this bed and face him. Not now, at least.Â
Heâs up for a little while longer, getting water. Turning the TV on and off. Rooting through your cabinets looking for booze you know you donât have. Finally, he settles on the couch. Youâre awake for another hour, unable to relax until youâre completely sure heâs asleep. Even as you drift off and your body finally relaxes your mind doesnât. You keep seeing that stricken look on his face and it makes you sick to your stomach.Â
Itâs the smell of pancakes that wakes you up. Youâre not sure when you finally managed to pass out last night but you know it was late. Which is why youâre so pissed off that youâre being forced to get up at seven in the morning.Â
Youâre used to being able to sleep in a lot later than that. Youâre already in a pissy mood from last night and it only gets worse as you trudge around your room getting ready. Youâve never been more thankful to have snagged one of the rare two-bathroom apartments in the building.
You donât want to have to share a bathroom with Logan. You donât even want to use the other one after what happened last night. Itâs too embarrassing and painful to think about. The emotional whiplash of feeling so desired and then absolutely hideous is making your head spin.Â
Youâre sure it was all just a problem on his end, but it really doesnât make you feel any better. When you canât stall any longer, and you know that Logan has heard you get up, you slip quietly out of your room.Â
The curtains in your living room are open and heâs in the kitchen fucking around with your stove. The news is playing quietly on the TV and youâre astounded about how little heâs done and how much more homely your apartment feels.Â
Itâs never really been home to you. Not after you were booted from the X-Men. But heâs somehow made it ten times cozier than it ever has been. You almost resent him a little for it.Â
âMorning,â he grumbles from the kitchen. âCoffee,â he motions behind him and you see a steaming cup already waiting for you. You silently slip behind him, grabbing the creamer from the fridge and pouring it until youâre sure itâs sweet enough to not actually taste the coffee.Â
âThanks,â you mutter, moving to sit at the table. You keep your eyes trained on the TV, pretending to pay attention to the news so you donât have to look at him. He bores his eyes into the side of your head until you feel like youâre going to have holes in your temple.Â
When you canât take it anymore you finally look over at him. He doesnât smile, his face barely even twitches, he just looks back to his pan and continues scrambling some eggs. âDidnât know you cooked,â you offer up weakly, already growing anxious from the silence.Â
It feels wrong, to be walking on eggshells in your own apartment. He grunts and shrugs, âNot really cooking. You had the mix in your pantry,â he tells you brusquely. His tone borders on rude and you scoff.Â
The audacity of this man to have an attitude with you in your apartment. He was the one who threw a hissy fit last night. You roll your eyes and go back to the news, all it tells you is that the world is just as depressing as the inside of your apartment is right now.Â
You notice out of the corner of your eye the way his shoulders slump forward. He leans against the oven, seeming not to care if he burns himself. You suppose it doesnât matter, heâd just heal. âSorry,â he mutters. It sounds like it pains him to say the words.Â
âWhatever,â you mumble under your breath. You take a long sip of your coffee, slurping a little so you have something to fill the atmosphere.Â
He puts some food on a plate and brings it over to the table for you. You usually donât eat breakfast, preferring to just skip the meal and eat a bigger lunch. But it feels too bitchy to say that to him, so you just accept the food with a strained smile. âThanks.â
He sits across from you, glaring down at your table like it insulted him. You drag your fork against the plate, letting the scrape of metal against porcelain drown out your worries. Finally, he looks at you. âLook, about last night.â
You tense up. You want to interrupt him, to stop him from explaining. You know itâs just going to hurt your feelings, whatever he says. Whether he tells you it was a mistake or he just realized heâs not attracted to you, either way, youâre fucked. But, itâs also kept you up all night so you just shut your mouth and let him speak.Â
You keep your gaze trained on your plate, unable to fully face him. He lets out a long sigh and clenches his fork so tight you hear the metal bend. He drops it to the table and clenches and unclenches his fists a few times.Â
âI just couldnât kiss you, not when I wasnât doing it for the right reasons.â
Your brows furrow in confusion and you finally look up at him. âWhat?â You demand, disbelief coloring your voice.Â
His eyes are boring into yours, an intensity behind the stare that leaves you feeling a little shaken. âYou look like her,â he whispers, and the grief is so thick in his voice it makes your throat tighten. He pauses briefly before continuing. âThere are,â he clears his throat like heâs trying not to cry. It makes you lean back in your chair, arms crossed over your stomach uncomfortably.Â
âThere are a few differences, obviously. Youâre not a carbon copy. But your mannerisms, your attitudes, youâre so similar. And I,â he shakes his head and gives you one of the most genuinely apologetic looks youâve ever received. You can tell he really does feel guilty for projecting on you but it doesnât make you feel any less uncomfortable. âAnd I just wasnât doing that for the right reasons. I was pretending you were her and thatâs just not fair to you.â
You lean your elbows on the table, head falling into your hands. You let out a rough sigh and groan in irritation. You knew the reason would hurt but you didnât think it would be this bad. You feel gross, icky under your skin knowing that he was pretending you were another version of yourself. The version of yourself youâve always wanted to be; the hero.Â
But you also feel such a deep sadness and sympathy for him. Heâd briefly mentioned that he was married to this other you. You canât even begin to imagine what it would feel like, to see your dead wifeâs face staring at you and she doesnât even know you.Â
âI,â you donât even know where to begin. You struggle to say anything for a minute and you both just stew in the tense silence. You take in a deep breath and look up at him. You do what you always do, forcing a smile and shrugging it off. âI appreciate the honesty, really.â You stand up, bringing your still-full plate into the kitchen and busying yourself with cleaning up.Â
âClearly,â you snap, your voice crueler than it should be, âIt was a mistake. Weâll just have to make sure it doesnât happen again, right?â
Logan sits silently at the table. He looks like thereâs more he wants to say but you donât give him the chance. You canât take it. You finally thought someone had wanted you for you, flaws and all. Youâre a fucking idiot, he barely even knows you. Whatever connection you thought was there was just brought about by your own loneliness.Â
âI gotta get ready for work,â you tell his back because he isnât looking at you now.Â
He nods, scraping his fork across the plate as he aggressively cuts into his food. âRight.â You wait for him to say anything else but he doesnât.Â
You walk past him and head back to your room. You donât even have a job, you donât have to work. But you still grab your purse and head out of the apartment. Pretending you do just so you donât have to look at him anymore.Â
You really should have let him finish, though. You should have let him keep talking to you. Let him explain how as much as he sees her in you, thatâs not why he wants you. He wants you for you. Because as similar as you can be, youâre still a completely different person from who his late wife was. Youâre someone strong and incredible and he genuinely wants you. But he can never really let himself be happy.Â
It takes a few days for you both to ease up around the other. The incident in the bathroom is never brought up again. You take him shopping for clothes after a few days. It feels wrong to keep giving him Wadeâs hand-me-downs. You would have had your friend take him, but you donât trust Wadeâs sense of fashion at all.Â
After that and getting lunch together while you were out shopping things got a little easier. You bought him a bed for the spare room because you felt guilty seeing him all cramped up on your tiny couch.Â
You donât initiate any physical contact with each other. The closest youâd gotten was your hands brushing when you both reached for some popcorn at the same time on movie night. But you hadnât really minded that bad.Â
Eventually, he starts to feel like a real roommate and a friend. He lets little pieces of himself slip out. Slowly opens up about his past. You havenât made any existential discoveries of course. But he tells you stories of what his X-Men were like.Â
You try not to dance around the topic of his wife, you donât want him to think youâre avoiding asking about her. But you also donât want him to think youâre obsessed with discussing her.Â
Heâs right, you two werenât carbon copies of each other at all. You might share a few things in common but the more both you and Logan learn about each other, the more clear it is how different you both are from your variants.Â
Sometimes you think he looks at you like heâs really seeing you, not her. But you can never be sure and you donât want to put much strength behind the thought in case youâre wrong. You hate the idea that when youâre thinking of nothing but him, heâs just seeing her reflection on your face.Â
Thereâs nothing you can do about it but it doesnât stop the hurt.Â
Tonight, at Wadeâs suggestion, youâre both up on the roof waiting for a meteor shower that youâre ninety percent sure is never going to happen. Youâre also one hundred percent sure that Wade just tricked you out of your apartment so he could have sex in it. He and Vanessa donât really get a lot of time alone with Blind Al around. Youâre already mentally preparing for the absolute fuck storm youâre going to have to clean up after. Â
Thereâs a light nudge on your shoulder and you glance over at Logan. Heâs got the whiskey bottle outstretched towards you and you take it from him with a smile. One thing about being his roommate, your alcohol tolerance has skyrocketed. His liver might regenerate, but youâre pretty sure if you keep going down this route yours will give out in a few months.Â
âThink this is actually going to happen?â You ask, pointing up toward the clear night sky.Â
Logan chuckles and shakes his head. He stretches out in your flimsy lawn chair and you try not to let your gaze be drawn to the sliver of skin peeking out from his shirt. âProbably not, but I donât mind being out here.â
Thereâs an unspoken, with you, that makes you smile. You meet his gaze, his eyes soft as he watches you. âMe either.â You lean back in your chair, pulling your legs up onto the seat and huddling under your blanket. âItâs peaceful.â
You drink together in silence for a little while longer. Then you have to tap out, you donât want your brain getting too foggy. Tonight is nice, you want to remember it tomorrow. To your surprise, he caps the bottle and places it to the side. You donât mention it but you do feel like youâve noticed heâs been drinking a little less. The dark circles under his eyes seem to be easing away ever so slightly.Â
He looks over at you with an odd light in his eyes. You shift uncomfortably under his stare when it lasts a little longer than it usually does. You chuckle awkwardly, âDo I have something on my face?â
Thereâs a soft uptick to his lips as he shakes his head. âNo,â he mutters, looking back out at the night. âYou mind if I ask you something?â
Ominous, but whatever. âSure.â
He still doesnât look at you and you worry slightly about whatever it is heâs going to ask. He doesnât ease you into it all, âWade said your brain was broken?â A laugh springs out of your throat from how brusque that was. He rolls his eyes. âFuckinâ idiot mentioned it in the void, been wonderinâ about it.â
âItâs fine,â you tell him. Youâre relaxed enough that you donât mind answering. You donât want to pop the soft bubble youâve managed to create around each other. âHere,â you hold your hand out for the whiskey bottle. He gives you an apprehensive look before handing it over.Â
You unscrew the cap, âThis,â you say and point your hand at the glass. The liquid inside lifts into the air and you freeze it before dropping it back into the bottle with a splash, a simple little party trick. âThis used to be enough to put me in a coma for two days. Thatâs what he meant. Something happened to me and I just couldnât do it anymore.â
Loganâs eyes widen and he shakes his head in disbelief. You laugh a little, âI assume your wife never had problems like that?â
Thereâs always a fond smile when you mention his wife. Whether the memory is bittersweet or not. âShe wasnât perfect, much as I thought so. When she used her powers too much she,â he trails off and looks down at the floor. You frown, ducking your head down so you can catch his gaze.Â
âYou donât have to talk if you donât want to,â you promise quietly.
But he shakes his head and gives you a weak, tight-lipped smile. âNo, I want to. And I donât want you to think youâre the only Flux who struggled. When she used her powers too much she would deteriorate. Parts of her would just disappear, I donât even know how to describe it. They were destroying her from the inside out.â
You let out a low whistle, eyes widening slightly. âWell, maybe I didn't get the short end of the stick after all.â Itâs quiet and for a moment you worry your humor was ill-timed.Â
But he lets out a rough laugh, âNo, I guess not.â He takes in a deep breath before looking back up at you. Thereâs no distant sadness in his eyes like there usually is when you bring her up. It seems to only be a familiar ache now, rather than something fresh and bleeding. âBut what happened to you? Why couldnât you use your powers?â
âOh,â you look down at your lap, picking at the strings of your pants. It would be unfair to have him talk about his wife and then wimp out when it was your turn.Â
âUm, There was this mission. A bunch of kids, mutants, were being held in this warehouse. It was actually pretty normal, just go in, retrieve them, and bring them back to safety. I must have done a dozen of these before, but, I donât know. Something was this different this time around.â
You can still hear them screaming. In your mind, you hear the way they cried for help. And you see the look on your faces when they realize you canât save them every time you go to sleep.Â
You suck in a sharp breath and almost jump when his hand lands on yours. Itâs gentle, heâs barely even touching you and heâs not even acknowledging what heâs doing. But you take his hand in yours and squeeze, itâs nice, grounding.Â
âLong story short, they were heavily guarded and I was pretty drained from fighting off the guards. My powers were practically gone by the time we could even get to the kids. And, I donât know, something must have gotten knocked over or hit the wrong way because smoke was filling the place and everything was on fire. I couldnât see anything, couldnât breathe, and the kids were blocked off. There was nothing we could do to get to them. Everyone kept screaming at me, telling me to just use my abilities and get them out of there. I couldnât,â your voice gets thick and you look anywhere but at him. âI,â your mouth hangs open and you donât know what you could possibly say.Â
Thereâs no excuse for what happened. âI just couldnât,â you whisper. You sniffle and your eyes flutter rapidly, trying to stop any tears from coming. âHadnât been able to use my powers since then. Trauma block or something, I guess,â you dismiss yourself flippantly and shrug.Â
Logan just squeezes your hand again. He doesnât seem to know what to say to comfort you and youâre honestly grateful for the silence. You get so sick of people telling you there was nothing you could have done. Or that the others should have helped you. Because thatâs not a fucking excuse. Thereâs no fixing what happened, no giving those parents their children back. You fucked up and you donât appreciate people giving you cop-outs.Â
You keep your gaze trained steadily on the ground, eyes going blurry while you try to slip into the back of your mind. You donât get the chance, though. Logan is kneeling in front of you, hands slipping up your arms to cup your face.Â
He forces you to look at him, to stay present in the moment with him. âYou fucked up,â he tells you. It's so shocking that you canât help but let out a loud wet laugh. You sniffle and he grins, wiping the tears out from under your eyes. His grip on your cheeks tightens and he makes sure youâre listening as he speaks, âYou fucked up, kid. But that doesnât mean you didnât try your fucking hardest. And it doesnât erase all the people you did help.â
Your eyes search him, trying to find any kernel of untruth. Trying to prove to yourself that this isnât real. That he isnât real. You donât deserve this moment of such unwavering trust and faith. This is meant for someone else, for someone who deserves good things in life.Â
Youâve never truly believed you deserved happiness or peace like this. But right now you donât care because he is saying everything youâve ever wanted to hear. And he actually means it.Â
Your hand drifts up, covering his and tilting your head to press a gentle kiss to his palm. Itâs tentative, a test, a way to give him an out if doesnât want this. His grip on you tightens for half a second before he shoots forward and claims your lips with his own.Â
It escalates quickly. You practically melt off your chair, straddling his lap while he leans back on the ground. Your hands tug at his hair while he moves desperately over your body. He canât seem to decide what he wants to do, where he wants to touch you.Â
You love how fully his hands engulf you, the tight way they cradle you to his chest. Youâve never felt more secure in someoneâs arms than you do right now. Heâs got you, and he wants you. For you this time, you can tell. You can tell from the way he holds you that this isnât a desperation born from grief. Itâs something else, something youâre not ready to identify yet.Â
His tongue laves across the seam of your lips, silently asking permission. You smile against the kiss, parting your lips and deepening it. He licks into you, tasting you with a low grunt in the back of his throat. You feel your hips start to move of their own volition. Gently grinding down against his lap. You moan when you feel just how bad he wants you.Â
You lean back, parting from the kiss and pressing a finger to his chest to keep from following. You chuckle at his eagerness, grinding your hips down again and watching the way he thrusts up to meet your movement. âDidnât know I was such a good kisser,â you tease.Â
But he doesnât return the joke or play along. His face falls slightly and he pulls further away from you, the look on his face distant. âWhat?â You whisper. âDo I have bad breath?â You joke, trying to keep the mood light.Â
He shakes his head and runs a tired hand over his face. âNo,â he mutters. He repeats the word more firmly and finally meets your gaze. âI think I need to take this slow, just because ofâŠâ
He trails off but you know what he means. His wife. You donât know if heâs still projecting her onto you, you felt so sure he wasnât earlier. But if every time you kiss heâs gonna pull back youâre not sure that you can do this. âOf course,â you mutter with a bite to your voice. Itâs hard not to feel a little rejected every time he acts like this.Â
You move to get off his lap but his hands clamp down on your hips and he shakes his head again. âYou donât have to get up.â
You hesitate, thighs still hovering over his. You should get up and put as much space between you as possible. But heâs so warm and you want to be held for a little while more. You nod and he looks relieved. You lean back down, pressing your chest against his and letting your head rest in the crook of his neck.Â
He wraps a heavy arm around your back, keeping you close while the other reaches up to stroke your hair. It makes you feel small, in a good way. Like you can just relax and heâll take care of you.Â
âGoddamn,â he laughs a little and you sit up. He nods to the sky above and you turn around, gasping.Â
âFuck,â you whisper, âhe wasnât lying.â For once, Wade was telling the truth. Above you, it looks like the sky is falling. Glittering stars dart across the sky, streaks of blue following behind them. You grin, âItâs so beautiful.â
Logan keeps his eyes on you and nods, âYeah, it is.â
âAh, look, my favorite fuck buddies.â
âWade,â you greet tightly. You shove the bottle of wine you brought into his chest and he stumbles back. âJust let us in, you freak.â
He frowns, placing a hand over his heart. âYou know, it really hurts when you talk like that. I think we all need to hold hands and have a good old-fashioned jerk circle.â
You roll your eyes and flick his thick forehead. âItâs share circle, dumbass.â
âNot the way I do it,â he moves to the side and lets you both in. âWell, mi casa es su casa, especially since Vanessa and I had rockinâ sex in your bed last week.â
He walks off before you can hit him or even begin to respond to that. âI fucking knew it,â you hiss, glaring at his stupid Hawaiian shirt while he mingles with the rest of the people at the party.Â
Logan chuckles behind you, âHow did you two ever become friends?â
You roll your eyes and turn to face him. âI moved in next door,â you respond dryly. âThis was a nonconsensual friendship because god hates me, clearly.â You shrug your jacket off and he takes it from you, hanging it up on the hook by the door. He comes back, slinging an arm around your shoulder, and leading you towards the kitchen.Â
You hear Wade laughing loudly in the background and he grunts, âIâm gonna need a drink for this,â he mutters. You nod your head in agreement. You donât get very far, though, because without any warning Wade is in front of you. Heâs got his ridiculous dog in his arms and shoves her in your face. You grimace and jump back. Logan abandons you and you narrow your eyes at his retreating back. Traitor
Wade says your name with disappointment. âYou know, Mary Puppins is a part of my life now. As my best friend, you need to bond with her. I canât have you two fighting like this.â He shoves the dog into your arms without any warning and you flinch away from her wandering tongue.Â
âIf this thing licks me, Iâm putting her down,â you warn him gravely.Â
He gasps and snatches her back. âYou are no longer welcome in my home,â he tells you with a snotty huff. You roll your eyes and watch him go. When heâs out of sight your lips curl up in a grin and you glance at Logan.Â
Heâs by the sink, making himself a drink and taking a deep swig straight out of the bottle. You creep up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist. He smiles, hand coming down to gently hold your arm. âWhatâre you doing?â
âCome with me,â you whisper. You take his hand and lead him through the apartment. You both skirt around the partygoers, giving them vague greetings and waving them off when they give you odd looks.Â
Logan leans down, lips brushing across your ear as he whispers, âWhere are we going?â Your knees nearly give out when you hear that low tone of voice of his. You just shake your head and lead him down the hall. You can sniff out Wadeâs room from the permeating stench of his axe body spray.Â
You throw the door open and drag Logan inside behind you. His nose wrinkles up at the stiff socks littering the floor and the smell. Other than that, itâs relatively clean. You actually thought this would look so much worse.Â
âNow,â Logan demands, âare you gonna tell me what weâre doing?â
âWell,â you lock the door and turn around with a devious grin. âSeeing as Wade has ruined my favorite sheets, I feel like we need to get him back somehow.â You glance around the room, trying to figure out something of his you want to destroy.Â
You donât hear Logan moving towards you. Youâre too busy rooting through Wadeâs desk and trying to find something good to shred up. All youâre seeing is increasingly more disturbing porno mags. He has got a serious problem with pegging. You briefly wonder if you should set up an intervention or something for him.Â
You nearly yelp when Loganâs hands grip your shoulders, whipping you around to face him. âIâve got an idea of what we can do.â Thatâs your only warning before his lips cover your own. You melt into him immediately, hands fisting his shirt and dragging him closer. He grins against your lips, lifting you and placing you on the edge of Wadeâs desk.Â
âMm,â you moan but shove his chest back and shake your head. âWait,â you hop off the desk and take a seat on Wadeâs bed instead. âThereâs no point in this if weâre not on the bed.â
Logan shakes his head with an amused huff. He walks towards you but instead of taking a seat on the bed next to you like you'd expected, he kneels before you. Your brows furrow together and you frown. âWait, whatâre you doing?â
He gives you a gentle smile, hands coming up to rub gently over your thighs. The warmth of his palms soothes you almost immediately. âYou trust me?â He asks, voice a low rumble against your chest.Â
âYeah,â you whisper. He nods encouragingly and leans forward, kissing you gently. Thereâs nothing expectant in this kiss. Heâs doing it just to be close to you. Then you feel his hands drifting higher, fingers running over the buttons of your jeans. Your lips part, ready to ask him a question. But he just takes the chance to dip his tongue into your mouth, eagerly tasting you. You moan into it, not protesting when he presses you back into the bed.Â
His fingers dip under the waistband of your jeans. You lift your hips to help him tug them the rest of the way down until theyâre dropping to the floor quietly. You have a million questions dancing on the tip of your tongue but you canât find it in yourself to actually voice any of them. You donât want to break the moment. This is the first time heâs seemed comfortable going further than kissing and some heavy petting.Â
âFuck,â he whispers. Your hips jolt as he runs a thumb over the wet spot on your panties. âAll this just from kissing?â He asks, a teasing lilt to his tone. You feel your face flush, cheeks warming when you realize heâs never actually seen just how much he affects you. âRelax,â he tells you, squeezing your thighs once before slipping a few lithe fingers under the band of your panties.Â
He tugs them down, but the second he sets eyes on you he gets too impatient to take them off the rest of the way. They dangle off one ankle while he lifts your thighs, setting them on his shoulder and dipping down to press a gentle kiss against you. You gasp at the contact, head tilting back while you instinctually grind your hips up against him.Â
Itâs been a long time since youâve actually been with anyone and you already know youâre going to cum embarrassingly quick because he fucking devours you. Youâve had boyfriends who liked to eat you out before, but this is something completely different.Â
He drags his tongue over you, sucking on your clit like itâs his only true joy in life. You canât even make noises, your jaw hanging slack while you cant your hips higher. He groans when you grind against his face, shaking his head and flicking his nose across your bud. You nearly come from the sight of him smiling against your cunt alone. You feel it building slowly, and itâs like your powers are swelling up along with your release.Â
Wadeâs knicknacks are floating off the shelves, some of them rotating in the air, others fluctuating between liquid and solid forms. You canât control yourself, youâre barely aware of the chaos happening in the room around you. You just feel a warmth at the tips of your toes, swelling over your body, making your skin feel too tight. Thereâs little to no warning when you cum. He dips his tongue inside you and you let out a long moan, drenching his face.Â
The sheets are soaking wet underneath you and you know youâve ruined his shirt. Youâve never come that hard before and you would reflect on that more if he wasnât still fucking eating you out. You think your brain is going to melt out of your ears, you're so overwhelmed by all the different sensations.
He dips his tongue into you, dragging out your orgasm and drinking as much of you down as he can. Your hips keep twitching, youâd be thrashing out of his hands if it wasnât for the near brushing grip he has on your hips. âFuck fuck fuck,â you reach down, grabbing his hair at the roots and tugging. He groans at the feeling, barely leaning an inch back. âNo more,â you whisper, chest heaving.Â
He smiles, palms smoothing across the skin of your thighs, âYou okay?âÂ
âMhm,â you hum weakly. Your head falls back against the bed with a dull thunk and you struggle to catch your breath. âHoly shit, where did you learn to do that?â He doesnât answer, just laughs. You jump slightly when he presses a tender kiss on your thigh, every part of you oversensitive.Â
He moves slowly up your body, hands dragging your shirt up until heâs pulling it over your head. He cups your cheeks, letting you recover while he kisses your cheeks and face. You laugh slightly at the feeling of his beard tickling you.Â
You pull back, meeting his gaze for a long drawn-out moment before you lean forward to finally kiss him back. You can feel yourself slowly coming back into your body. Your limbs tingle back to life while you lazily make out with him.Â
His hands drift down your chest, squeezing your breasts. You laugh against his lips, arching into his touch. You reach back, unclipping your bra and throwing it off somewhere in the room. In the far reaches of your mind, you make a mental note to take that when you go. You donât want to think about what Wade would do with it if he found it.Â
Logan pulls back from you and your lips tip down at the serious look he wears. Your fingers trace the lines of his face and you tilt your head in question. âWhatâs wrong?â You whisper. Youâre completely naked before him and heâs still clothed, you donât want him to leave now.Â
He canât keep doing this to you. He canât keep forcing you into these vulnerable positions and then leaving. Thereâs only so much rejection you can take before you start to resent him for it.Â
He tilts his head down, gaze dragging across your body appreciatively. Heâs looking at you like youâre art and it makes you feel like you should be in a museum somewhere. Finally, his hand drags down from your chest, wrapping around your waist and dragging you onto his lap.Â
You brace your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself. He leans towards you, lips trailing lightly across your jaw. âYouâre not her,â he whispers against your skin. Your mouth parts, a pained breath slipping through. You try to move back from him. You hadnât expected something like that, not now, not when you thought youâd made so much progress together.Â
To have you naked, vulnerable like this, and then say something like that to you. It was fucking despicable. You shove his shoulders back but he barely moves. You shift, trying to cover yourself and fighting off the urge to cry. Why wonât he let you go? Why does he keep doing this to you?Â
He reaches out, snatching up your wrist before you can get far. âI donât want you to be. I never wanted you to be her, I need you to know that.â
He tries to kiss you but you snatch his jaw in your hand before he can. You let your nails dig in until thereâs red blooming under your fingertips. He hisses, but heâs not mad, you can feel how much he enjoys the little pinpricks of pain.Â
âNo more pulling away,â you warn. âIâm not playing this damn game with you anymore, Logan. You want me, then commit.â You release him with a shove and his pupils dilate with want. You appreciate the gentle way heâs been treating you, but you know youâre both holding back.Â
Heâs the first partner youâve been with that can actually take what you give and vice versa. Thereâs something only mutants understand sometimes. You normally have to hold back, have to make sure you donât scare a guy off by making the walls shake when you come.Â
You push him down onto the bed. Hands sliding under the hem of his shirt and running over the grooves of his muscles. You havenât had a chance to appreciate just how gorgeous his body is before, but nothing is holding you back now.Â
You snap your fingers and the buttons rip open, he surges forward catching your lips with his while you both frantically push his shirt off. He throws it off to the side and his fingers fumble with his belt buckle while you trail kisses down his neck. You glance up at him for a second before biting down on a particularly sensitive spot.Â
He groans, head rolling back while you grin against his skin. You make your way back to his lips. âDonât hold back,â you tell him, trailing your hands down to his fists and running over the spots where the claws come out.Â
âSweetheart,â he starts tone apprehensive. You shake your head, shutting him up with a kiss.Â
âDonât. Hold. Back.â
Itâs like a switch flipping. Even the way he looks at you changes. Youâre not something to be cherished and adored. You feel like a deer pinned by a wolf. Heâs got you in his clutches now and thereâs a real possibility you might not survive this.Â
He stands up, dropping you on the bed and dragging your hips off the edge. He doesnât kick his jeans off, just lowers them enough for his cock to hang out. Youâll address the fact that he wasnât wearing boxers later, youâre too worried about whatâs hanging between his legs right now.Â
Youâre no virgin, but goddamn, thereâs no way thatâs going to fit.Â
He laughs, the noise cruel and it makes shivers crawl down your spine. âWeâll make it work, kid.â He spreads your legs and you tilt your hips up, making it easier for him to just sip inside.Â
Thereâs a slight stretch, but youâre already soaked for him. Youâve been waiting for this to happen since you walked in on him naked in your bathroom. âOh, shit,â you toss your head back, taking in a deep breath while he pushes in. It feels like heâs rearranging your insides, molding you to fit him perfectly.Â
You can already feel yourself clenching down, just being so close to him is enough to make that tingle in the tips of your toes start. He leans down, placing your legs over his elbows and rutting into you like a wild animal. Thereâs nothing gentle or slow about this.Â
Youâre both so pent-up, tired from the weeks of dancing around each other. Your nails drag up his back, blood following your movement. Your powers are actively surging against him, pain only driving you further into each otherâs arms.Â
You can hear his breathy grunts and groans in your ears and itâs music to you. Neither of you cares about the party going on just outside the door. Youâre loud, skin slapping against skin while you loudly call out his name.Â
God, you hope they hear you. Hope they realize just how thoroughly youâre wrecked for each other. You can feel yourself getting closer, hips stuttering against his while you struggle to match his pace. âCome on,â he mutters in your ear. He releases one of your legs to reach down and rub your clit.Â
âFuck,â you groan, reaching up and tugging at his hair while your back bows. It only takes a few more tight circles of his thumb before youâre spasming around him. Heâs quick to follow behind you.Â
He pins your hips to the bed, dropping your legs while he thrusts faster. He loses his rhythm, the muscles of his abdomen flexing as he cums inside you. Itâs like a mini death, you feel like youâve lost time when you finally manage to come back to yourself.Â
And when you roll your head to the side you realize just how much damage youâve done to Wadeâs bed. âShit,â You glance up at the sound of his voice and notice little droplets of blood on your hips. Loganâs claws are out, stuck in the fluff of the bed.Â
You force the words out, tongue heavy in your mouth. âDo that often?â
âNot really,â he mutters. The claws retreat and he rubs his fingers over the blood. Itâs not bad, youâve honestly done worse to yourself. Itâs like a big paper cut. When the rough pad of his fingers presses against the cut you hiss at the sting, nearly enjoying it.Â
âMust be special,â you tell him with a cheeky grin. He shakes his head with a laugh and takes his time pulling out. You hate the loss of him inside you but it's a slight relief. He's larger than any partner youâve ever had and itâs almost overwhelming to be so full.Â
âCome on, let's get you dressed.â He pats your thighs, glancing around for your clothes.Â
âUh, Logan,â he looks up and you glance at his still very hard cock. âI thought you came?â
The smile he gives you is slightly terrifying. Because thereâs a promise in it. Heâs not getting you dressed for no reason. Heâs taking you back to your apartment so you can have more fun where there are less people and fewer reminders of Wade. âStamina's part of the deal, sweetheart.â
âOh,â you whisper, voice breathless in shock. You wipe the cum off your legs with Wadeâs sheets. You feel like youâve thoroughly gotten revenge on him for destroying your favorite bed set. Maybe, youâve gone a little farther than revenge, though.Â
You feel guilty, looking around the room and seeing everything you destroyed. Once youâre dressed, you wave your hand, putting most things back where they belong. But thereâs nothing you can do about the bed. The sheets are soaked with a mixture of yours and Loganâs releases and there are six holes dug deep in the bed from his claws.Â
When you step out of the room with Logan, struggling to press down your hair and get it back into place, Blind Al is waiting by the door. Sheâs doing a line off the back of her hand when you pass by. You think youâve almost made it scott-free when she yells, âMan, I wish I couldnât fucking hear,â at you.Â
You tense up, shoulders to your ears while you run to the door. Logan laughs, grabbing your coat for you and pressing a hand to your back while he leads you to the apartment. âWerenât feeling so embarrassed earlier,â he teases.Â
âShut up,â you grumble, dragging him into the apartment to finish what you couldnât on Wadeâs bed.Â
Youâve managed to keep any holes out of your bed, you just have to use your powers to keep his at bay. Itâs nice, not having to explain why everything around you is levitating to the person youâre having sex with. There were a lot of awkward conversations that came from that.Â
Youâre lying on Loganâs chest, fingers idly running over the veins in his biceps. âI want to be serious about this,â you tell him.Â
His hand pauses from where itâd been stroking your back. You sit up on your elbow so you can get a better look at him. âI mean it, I,â thereâs no way to say this without sounding like a complete bitch. You just have to rip the bandaid off.Â
You take in a deep breath, âI know that you still miss her,â you say, unwilling to say her name. Logan sits up, looking more serious now. âBut I donât want to be with you if you think that Iâm going to turn into her. Or if you think that Iâm the last connection you have to her. Iâm not her, Logan, and I'm never going to be her.â
You expect anger on his face or regret, maybe. But you donât expect him to laugh at you. You roll your eyes, lips pursed while you wait for him to finish. He notices the pissy expression on your face and quiets down, but you still see a smile fighting on his lips.Â
âI know youâre not her. You could not be more differentâ he tells you with a slight smirk, like thereâs an inside joke youâre missing out on. âI was married to her for a long time and I loved her. But we had our time together. Now, I just want my time with you. Youâre not her,â he leans forward, pressing a sweet kiss to your forehead. âThatâs why I want you.â
You feel your heart flutter in your chest and have to fight to keep a stupid grin off your face. âOkay,â you whisper. âGood, well as long as weâre on the same page,â you tell him, faux serious. He just rolls his eyes and pulls you back into his arms.Â
Youâre going to cuddle up beside him when you hear your phone going off like crazy on your nightstand. Your face pinches in confusion and you reach over to grab it.Â
Wade
Did you fuckers have sex???
In my bed!!!!
And you didnât invite me?!
âŠ.
Wade
Tell Logan I want his claws in me next
âFuckinâ dumbass,â you mutter, throwing your phone somewhere on the bed. Logan laughs again, drawing you closer.Â
a/n: i have a really weird tendency for masochism, idk what thatâs about. I just feel like if you were having sex with this man, heâs taking you like a wild animal. also feel like I might be a one-hit wonder. the smut just wasnât doing it for me this time guys nor was the angst, iâm disappointed in myself
I just don't think I did justice to his character in the movie, I might have made it too OOC/ if I did PLEASE let me know
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus âĄ
logan howlett x fem!mutant!reader
One-shot A/N: I've decided using the same X-men name/powers for the reader in my Logan fics is easier because coming up with superpowers is hard and stupid. They call you flux, like once, it's really just a nickname incoming warning for fluff so bad you'll get a cavity Summary: You're on probation from the team and official house arrest after a little accident with your powers. Logan knows you're going stir-crazy so he takes you to the arcade for some fun. And then your friendship takes a weird turn. (80's timeline in mind, but characters not from the 80âs will be mentioned) Clueless!reader
Youâd had an accident, a few weeks ago. Well, accident might be downplaying it too much. Youâd destroyed the garden and left a ten-foot crater in the backyard of Charlesâ prestigious grounds. In your defense, you had warned them all that it wasnât a good idea to take your cuffs off.Â
The metal bands are entirely necessary to make sure you canât lose control and wipe out everything around you. Manipulation at an atomic level is beyond fatal. You donât want to think about what would have happened if youâd had the meltdown and the kids were anywhere near you.Â
Charles had been able to shut you down, but now heâs keeping you on probation. Youâve been locked up in the mansion, unable to leave until you managed to get your abilities under control. Thereâs never been a problem with wearing the cuffs before. You donât understand why heâs so against them now.Â
Youâre going stir-crazy. Thereâs only so many times you can pace your room before you start to lose your mind. Heâs not even letting you teach classes anymore. Youâre stuck training, all day, every day.Â
âFocus!â Charles snaps and you resist the urge to turn his bones liquid. Maybe that would get him off your back.Â
Instead of killing your friend, you glare at the large tank of water in front of you. You do what youâve been doing for the past half hour. It fluctuates from liquid to gas to solid, and then liquid again. An endless cycle of repetition that makes you want to melt your brain so you donât have to do this anymore.Â
You drop your hand and huff. âThis is pointless, Charles. Whatâs this even teaching me?â
He crosses his arms, walks over to you, and pointedly glares at the tank in front of you. You roll your eyes and look back at it. âShit,â you hiss. In your frustration, the glass has cracked and splintered into dust. Water pools around your stool and leaks through the wood of the floor. You flick your wrist, the glass swirling around you before reforming into the tank. The water follows along, droplets lifting from the floor and dropping back into the container.Â
âOne moment of frustration, of distraction. Thatâs all it took.â Charles shakes his head and walks back over to his desk. He picks the cuffs up and you slip them silently back onto your wrists. âHow can you be trusted to protect your team on the field if you canât control this? What are you going to do when youâre panicked and fighting for your life?â
Shame bubbles in your gut. It makes you nauseous and forces your eyes to the floor so you donât have to face him. He sighs, placing his hands on your shoulders and squeezing gently. You glance up at him briefly and he offers a strained smile.Â
âThis is for your protection, as much as you hate it, Flux. Itâs necessary.â You scoff at the use of your X-Men name. Not much of an X-Man if youâre not even on the field anymore.Â
âRight,â you mutter. âThanks for the lesson in incompetency,â you donât let him respond and slam the door to his office closed behind you. You feel bad the second you get outside and onto the porch. He doesnât deserve your bitchiness. Itâs your own fault you canât get a handle on this. You don't have anyone to blame but yourself.Â
You let out a dramatic sigh, throwing yourself into a rocking chair and running your hands over your face. The once comforting weight of your cuffs is now oppressing. It just feels like a constant reminder of your failure. You should already have a handle on all of this, but you struggle to even manipulate water.Â
âRough day?â You donât open your eyes as Logan walks by. He takes a seat on the rocking chair beside you, letting out a low groan as he stretches.Â
You let your hands drop into your lap, staring at the sunset so you donât have to face him. Youâve already dealt with enough dejection today. You donât need to look at him and be reminded that you want him in a way you can never have.Â
âMhm,â you hum, propping your head in your hand as you watch the sun disappear behind the clouds. The sky is painted in hues of pink and orange that seem too hopeful for how you feel right now.Â
Logan chuckles, the sound low and gravely. It makes your heart stutter in your chest and you cringe in embarrassment. You know he can hear the way your heart practically beats free of your ribs when youâre around him. Youâre sure with that nose of his he can smell some sort of hormonal change in you every time you lay eyes on him.Â
You swear youâve never felt this way about a man before. You havenât had many boyfriends before, itâs not really common among mutants. Not many people are accepting of you when they know what you are. And some people are too into you.Â
But you've had crushes, and none of them have been as bad as this one is. You want to gnaw on him. It sounds fucking insane every time you think about it. But when you train with him and he tears his shirt off, you want to sink your teeth into him and never let go.Â
You feel feral around him, a side of you surfacing that youâre not used to. Maybe itâs because of his mutant abilities. They are very animalistic, itâs easy to blame that on how desperately you crave him.Â
You hate being around him and despise not being in his presence. Itâs conflicting, and more often than not you sound like a bumbling idiot when you speak to him because your brain is going in a million different directions.Â
You hear the familiar click of his lighter and then he shifts again. You risk a peek over at him and regret it the second you do. His head is tilted back, eyes closed in relaxation as he stretches across the porch. Smoke leaks out of his lips as he groans in satisfaction.Â
You have to pick your jaw up off the floor and make sure there isnât drool on your chin. This is insane. Youâre a grown woman, how does he have this much of an effect on you? Heâs not even doing anything! Heâs just sitting there and you want to jump his bones.Â
You whip your head around, mumbling incoherently to yourself to get it together. Logan peaks an eye open and you miss the mischievous tilt to his lips. âSomething wrong?â
I need to have sex with you or Iâm going to explode.Â
You stutter for a few seconds, getting your mind back together. âJust training with Charles,â you mutter.Â
He sits up a little straighter and quirks a brow. When you donât continue he sighs. âAnd?â He prods, impatient for your answer. You hope youâre not reading into it, but you think heâs been as disappointed by your absence from the team as you are. He always complains about being partnered up with Scott. You like to think itâs because he misses you. But youâre probably just delusional.Â
âAnd, nothing,â you sigh. Your hands flop against your legs and you glare at the bands on your wrists. âNo progress. I still canât control them without these on, and my abilities are watered down and useless with the cuffs.â
Logan huffs, youâre caught off guard by the sudden warmth on your thigh. You glance down, eyes widening ever so slightly when you see his hand on your leg. It nearly covers the whole thing and when he squeezes your thigh you think youâre going to pass out.Â
Youâre friendly. But youâve never been touchy. At least not like this. The placement of his palm is very intimate and you are struggling not to just get on your knees and profess your undying love. You take in a deep breath, looking up at him so you can get your heartbeat under control.Â
But looking at him just makes it worse. Because there is so much faith and fondness in his gaze as he looks at you. His lips are tilted up, eyes soft, and youâve never had someone make you feel so warm and secure from just a look.Â
âYou arenât useless,â he tells you. He squeezes your thigh again before he retreats back to his chair. You have to clamp your jaw shut so you donât beg him to keep touching you and never stop. âYouâre just stuck in this house all day. Youâve got nothing to do but sit in your failure.â
You scoff and throw yourself back in your seat. âDonât remind me. Iâve begged Charles to let me out.â Your gaze drifts to the crater in the backyard. Some of the kids have been working on filling it in, but whatever energy youâd let go of has left a permanent mark. âHe refuses to give me permission.â
Logan laughs, the noise teasing and a little mean. Your brows furrow and you glance over at him with a questioning look. He tilts his head in disbelief like youâre an idiot. âSeriously, Flux? Just fuckinâ leave, who gives a shit?â
âUh,â you think on it for a minute before weakly settling on, âCharles?â
His face falls and you sink lower into your seat. He looks out at the yard, gaze distant. His jaw clenches a few times before he puts the cigar out on the ashtray beside him. He gets to his feet and you think he might just leave. Instead, he turns towards you.Â
Youâre caught off guard by the little smirk on his face. âWanna have some fun?â
Only an idiot would say no.Â
You grin and place your hand in his, yelping slightly at how easily he pulls you to your feet. You stumble into his chest and are hesitant to back away when his hand drifts to rest on your waist. He looks down at you, smiling, he squeezes your waist once before he backs up.Â
âCome on, kid.â He tugs you inside the house, leading you downstairs to the garage. You already know what heâs going for before the door is even open.Â
âDidnât Scott tell you to leave his bike alone?â Logan takes a step inside. He pauses, glancing over his shoulder and grinning at you. It makes your breath catch in your throat, the happiness on his face. You never see him like this around the others.Â
You hate thinking like that. Placing too much importance on your relationship with him will only lead to heartbreak down the road. But, you never see him act the way he does with you with anyone else.
âSince when have I ever listened to Cyclops, sweetheart?âÂ
âGood point,â you mutter, moving to stand next to him.Â
He straddles the seat and looks over expectantly at you. âDonât you need a helmet?â
You shake your head, âOh, no, itâll ruin my hair.â You laugh but he gives you a deadpan look. You donât regenerate the way he does. An accident would be a lot more fatal for you than it would be for him. You huff, âRelax, Lo, I can use my powers.â When he looks like heâs not going to drop it, you let some energy swirl around your fingers. It solidifies the air around your skin, you reach up and flick at his skull hard enough to hear the metal ding.Â
He grunts, glaring down at your hand while you grin. âSee,â you whisper, sliding onto the back of the bike and wrapping your arms around his waist. âIâm perfectly safe.â He shakes his head and starts the bike.Â
The ride to the arcade is spent in silence. Logan always seems to break every speeding law known to man whenever he takes Scottâs bike out. Youâre not sure if he does it to purposefully piss the man off, but it makes you cling to him like a wild animal. You feel like if you hit one speed bump youâre going to go flying.Â
By the time he parks your legs feel like jello. He laughs a little at the way your face has blanched. Again, he offers you a hand and holds the door open to lead you inside. Youâre trying not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but this whole thing is odd.Â
You guys are friends. And youâre friendlier with each other than most of the mutants in the school. But this feels different somehow. For one, Logan kind of despises the arcade. Itâs an amalgamation of bad smells and loud noises, and it overwhelms his already sensitive senses. Youâve heard him complain about the smell of body odor and fake cheese enough times when you went on a field trip with the kids.Â
Secondly, heâs being more touchy than he normally would. Youâre not complaining. You werenât exactly hugged a lot as a kid, mainly just passed between different mutant fetish clubs. Logan isnât known for handing hugs out so easily. But right now, he doesnât seem to be ready to not have at least one hand on you.Â
Maybe heâs just cheering you up. You need to stop drifting so far into your mind and just enjoy the night. âAlright, whatâs first bub?â
You grin and drag him towards the claw machine. âIâm horrible at these things,â you inform him as you put your quarters in. âBut, I hold out hope that one day Iâll be able to actually beat this monster.â
Three failed attempts later, itâs become embarrassingly clear that you will never beat the claw machine. Logan isnât even trying to hide his amusement as you become increasingly more frustrated. Thereâs a certain point where this game stops being fun and starts to be an affront to your character.Â
Logan peers into the machine and asks, âWhat are you going for?â
âThe pigeon,â you mutter. Your tongue pokes between your lips, and your eyes narrow in concentration. You aim the claw over the pigeon perfectly and slam your hand down on the big red button.Â
Youâre allowed five seconds of celebration before the damn thing slips out of the claws grasp and tumbles into the pile of stuffies below. âDammit, Bart,â you let the ridiculous name youâve come up with for the toy slip.
Logan snorts, leaning against the glass while you jam another quarter in the slot. âBart?â He teases.Â
You shake your head and give him a look out the side of your eye. âWhat, you think I call myself Flux because Iâm good at coming up with names?â You give up after the last failed attempt and turn to face him with a huff.Â
He clicks his tongue and shakes his head. âTough luck, kid.â He slings an arm over your shoulder and pulls you towards the concession stand.Â
âShut up,â you laugh, slapping lightly at his chest.Â
The rest of the night is nice. He doesnât play much except for the strength-oriented games. And then you kind of just exploit him for more tickets. By the time you get back to the mansion, youâve forgotten all about why you were upset in the first place.Â
Nothing had gone wrong, you didnât have a total meltdown and wipe out the entire arcade. You donât know why Charles was so afraid of letting you out.Â
Logan walks you back to your room, his hand heavy on your lower back as you head up the stairs. Youâre talking endlessly, filling up any gap of silence with rambling youâve lost track of. You donât know what it is about him that invites you to yap the way you do, but youâre always embarrassed by it the second he leaves.Â
You reach your door and smile up at him. âThanks, Lo.â
He gives you a soft smile, his eyes wrinkling endearingly at the corners. He reaches up and brushes some hair off your shoulder. Thereâs a certain shift in his expression that has your breath stopping short. Whatever else you were going to say to him tumbles off into an incomprehensible whisper.Â
He leans down and every inappropriate thought youâve ever had about him suddenly surges to the front of your mind. Your lips part in anticipation, thinking heâs going to kiss you and your fantasies are going to come to life.Â
His lips brush against your cheek so gently you almost donât feel them. ââNight Flux,â he leans back and your body goes with him. He backs off with a smile, walking down the hall to his own room. You feel dazed, eyelashes fluttering rapidly as you fan your cheeks and try to come to terms with what just happened.
He didnât kiss you, but you oddly arenât disappointed. You go to bed that night with a lovesick grin on your face. Well, you would have. Were it not for the annoyingly British voice ringing out in your head, âTrainingâs at four tomorrow morning. Consider it your punishment for sneaking out.â
âFuck,â you hiss to yourself. Stupid fucking telepaths.Â
You thought the arcade was a one-off moment. But Logan keeps sneaking you out of the mansion. Charles hasnât officially lifted the house arrest, but heâs given up trying to keep you inside. Besides, youâve essentially got a chaperone since Logan is always with you.Â
You make lunch for the two of you and heâll take you out to the woods for a picnic. Or youâll go to the movies together. Sometimes you donât even do anything, just linger around each other. You enjoy the company, and you love having these quiet moments together with no one else around.Â
Your favorite part of all of this has to be the way heâs started touching you. Heâs always got a hand on your leg or back. And if he canât do that, then youâre tucked into his side. Itâs feeding into a starved part of you that youâve left neglected for far too long.Â
Itâs only been about two weeks of these fun little adventures and odd behavior. Youâre dreading the moment theyâll stop. Youâre not sure when Loganâs going to deem you properly cheered up, but youâre hoping itâs not anytime soon.Â
There have been a few more moments where you think your friendship might turn into something more, and every time youâve been interrupted. Youâre actually starting to feel a little edged. Youâve been considering just grabbing him and planting one on him. But every time you think about it you get sick to your stomach.Â
You donât want to make a move on him and end up getting rejected. You know heâs just being a good friend and taking care of you so you donât end up spiraling too far in your head. Itâs happened before, when youâve been struggling with your abilities. Heâs just keeping you from shutting down again and you donât want to make him uncomfortable because youâre hopelessly in love.Â
When you walk out of your room this morning youâre immediately smacked in the face. âWhat the fuck, guys?â You yell at the two kids running past your room. Not the best language for someone who's supposed to be a role model. You canât be bothered though, not when theyâre running around throwing pink rolls of streamer at your face.Â
âSorry!â Mary calls over her shoulder, laughing as she pins a heart up onto the wall. Youâre sure Charles wonât appreciate the hole in his old ass mahogany wood. Itâs only as you watch her run down the stairs that you register just what is going on.Â
There is pink and red everywhere. It looks like Dollar Store Cupid has thrown up all over the mansion. Youâve been so caught up in your attraction to Logan that, ironically, youâve forgotten what month it was.Â
You grumble bitterly to yourself as you trudge down the stairs. Another Valentineâs Day alone and single. How lovely. You spot two kids giggling to themselves by the banister, they lean in like theyâre going to kiss and you gag. âHey!â You snap, and they jump apart, eyes wide with fear. âQuit it, get out of here.â They scramble off and you feel just a little bit vindicated.Â
âNot a fan of young love, Flux?â
You groan and roll your eyes, turning around to find a very smug Scott watching you bully teenagers. âShut it, Summers,â you warn. You point an accusing finger at him and he raises his hands in surrender. Faux innocence played across his insufferable smirk. âWhen youâre in a committed relationship, you donât get to judge me.â
His brows turn down in confusion, âWait, but arenât you and Logan-â
Heâs cut off by the sound of a loud crash down the hall. You both turn around just as one of the classroom doors slams open. A bright pink explosion hurtles from the doors and a throng of coughing students follows.Â
Jubilee walks out a minute later, a guilty expression on her face. âSorry, I was just trying to make it more Vanetine-y.âÂ
You glance over at Scott, grinning widely at him while you pat his shoulder and walk past him, leaving him to clean up the mess. âEnjoy the young love, Summers.â
You actively avoid Logan all day. Youâre already facing constant reminders of how lonely you are. You see kids walking around with baskets of bears and chocolates. Or you catch them passing notes in class with scribbled hearts all over the front.Â
Thereâs only so much a girl can take before she loses it. The last thing you need is to be faced with the man you have the worst unrequited crush on in history. But he doesnât seem to get the hint. Heâs everywhere you go, popping up around corners and trying to catch your attention.Â
You keep brushing him off and pretending like you have something urgent youâre going to be late for. Eventually, though, he was going to catch up with you.Â
It happens in the kitchen. Most of the kids are in their rooms or the library. The noise has died down and youâre alone. You grumble to yourself, ripping down a pink streamer that keeps drifting across the top of your head and pissing you off. You grab a frozen meal from the fridge and are about to microwave it when he speaks.Â
âHuh, thought youâd want something a little more romantic than a frozen burrito.âÂ
You gasp, clutching your chest and whirling around on him while your heart races. âLogan, Jesus, you scared me.â Heâs frowning at you, eyes glaring at the frozen package in your hand. âUm,â you toss it back in the freezer but the look on his face isnât going away. âYeah, I might just go with cereal instead.â
He looks at you and then glances behind him. You peer around his shoulder but you donât see anything. Without much warning, he grabs your wrist and pulls you towards the stairs. âLogan?â Thereâs no point in trying to resist him, he could just toss you up the stairs if he wanted to. Still, the silence is kind of creeping you out.Â
You call his name a few more times but give up when he makes it clear heâs not going to be answering you anytime. Thereâs a rotten feeling in your stomach. You have this awful idea like youâre in trouble for something. Like a little girl who's gotten her hand caught in the cookie jar too many times.Â
He stops you in front of his door and nods towards it. âYou want me to go inside?â He crosses his arms and glares down at you. You huff and mutter, âJesus, fine.â What the hell is wrong with him?
You grab the doorknob to his room, glaring at him while you do. You throw the door open dramatically, taking a step inside and surveying the area. âWow,â you suck your teeth and shake your head. âYou have not decorated at all.â
âShut up, smartass,â he mutters in your ear. Chills prick at your skin from his proximity. A shudder goes down your spine as the low tone of his voice reverberates through you. âLook a little harder.â
You roll your eyes but acquiesce. Another run over the room finally shows you what you missed. You gasp and rush towards his bed, âHoly shit, Bart!â He chuckles behind you as you pick the stuffed pigeon up.Â
âWent back for him after we left,â Logan tells you.Â
You glare at him, eyes narrowed in suspicion. âHow many tries did this take you?â He mouths a smug one and you roll your eyes in irritation. You look back down at the pigeon and smile.
He smells like the inside of a claw machine. His head is sewed on crookedly and youâre pretty sure heâs missing an eye. But heâs absolutely perfect to you. Youâre about to thank Logan when you spot something metal wrapped around the stuffieâs neck. âWhatâs this,â you mumble to yourself.Â
You slide your fingers under the chain and tug it off Bartâs neck. Loganâs dog tags dangle off your fingers and you stare at him in shock. A sudden cold dread washes over you and you find yourself immobile. âLogan,â you trail off, an unspoken question following his name.Â
He smirks, walking towards you and slipping the tags out of your hand. âI wanted you to have this,â he says, his voice low like this moment is too precious to break, âso you know youâre not alone. Youâre always so afraid of whatâs going to happen if you lose control out in the field. But you forget, youâre not alone. You have me, youâre always going to have me.â He places the tags over your neck, untucking your hair from the chain.Â
You donât even have words for him. Itâs such a deeply personal gift. But this also feels incredibly intimate. Thereâs no possible way for you to reason this away. This isnât something âjust friendsâ do.Â
He seems to prefer your silence, anyway. One of his hands drifts from your neck and cups your jaw. With the utmost tenderness, he lifts your face to his. âWanted to do this for a while,â he whispers. You almost ask what heâs talking about, but his lips are already covering yours.Â
Itâs incredibly soft, this kiss, softer than youâre used to. Heâs barely putting any pressure on you and it makes you realize that youâre still not moving. Youâre just standing there in shock, eyes wide open while the man youâve wanted since youâve known him kisses you.Â
You drop Bart to the floor and your arms come up to twine around his neck. You finally close your eyes, let your body melt into his knowing heâll catch you. The second you reciprocate he really kisses you. Neither of you hold back, each of you pouring all the pent-up desire youâve felt for each other.Â
Youâve spent so long dancing around this, around each other. Itâs like a missing puzzle piece is returned to you as Logan holds you. You feel full, complete, warmer than you ever have before.Â
You part from him - needing air - painfully slow. You donât want to spend a second away from him now that you have him. You wish you didnât have to breathe. Wished you could have kept kissing him and never stopped.Â
Logan chuckles, pressing a kiss against your forehead like he can read your thoughts. You can feel the dorky smile thatâs about to split your cheeks. You bite your lip, hoping it might suppress it, but you know itâs pointless.Â
You look up at him with a cheeky twinkle in your eye. âAre you asking me to be your Valentine, Lo?â
He scoffs and pulls away from you slightly. âDo you have to ask your girlfriend to be your Valentine?â
Your eyes widen and your mouth opens and closes rapidly. âI- Well- I mean,â you take a full step back from him and shake your head. âWhat?â You finally settle on. âI mean, Iâm not objecting, at all, but what?â
Logan tilts his head, a disbelieving look on his face. âWhat do you think weâve been doing the past three weeks?â
You shake your head, stuttering and struggling for an answer. âI donât know. I thought you were being a good friend!â
He smiles, thereâs no irritation on his face at your cluelessness. If anything he seems to be more endeared to you. âYou think I take all my friends on romantic picnics in the woods?â
You sigh, letting out a long disappointed breath. You canât believe youâve been so blind. When you think about it, his behavior lately makes a lot more sense. Youâre not sure how you were able to trick yourself for so long.Â
âWell,â you start, walking back towards him as he pulls you into a hug, âcertainly not Scott.â He huffs and shakes his head. You give him a sheepish smile, brows knitted together. âI canât believe weâve been dating this whole time.â
He just presses another kiss to your temple and shrugs. âItâs alright, sweetheart, you can make it up to me by being my Valentine again next year.â
Thereâs something unspoken in his voice. A promise that heâs planning to be around for a lot longer than a year. You smile at him, silently promising the same. âOnly if youâre mine.â
âWouldnât have it any other way.â
a/n: iâm gonna gag actually. Made myself cringe there at the end. I want a valentine next year so bad, itâs sad. But whatâs the point of a valentine if itâs not going to be Logan?
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
dividers by @/thecutestgrotto
One-shot A/N: I've never felt this way about a fictional character before. Every gif I see of him has me gnawing and biting at the bars of my enclosure. I want to bite him. If Hugh Jackman ever discovered what thoughts lurk inside my rotted brain about him he'd get a restraining order. This isn't OKAY Anyways... Summary: You'd thought you'd had a good thing going with Logan. You weren't officially anything to each other, but you were getting close. You truly saw a future with him, but he made it incredibly clear he did not feel the same 18+ HATE FUCKING (MDNI)
(one chance please, just one chance with him)
âAre you sure this isnât totally clingy girlfriend of me?â
Ororo gives you an irritated look and Jean laughs. âNot at all, Scott loves it when I surprise him like this.â Youâre all huddled in your room, each of you in varying stages of getting ready. Jean is finishing off her eyeliner at your vanity, Ororo is putting on her boots, and youâre trying to decide between a skirt and a dress.Â
Youâre not entirely sure how, or why, Logan and Scott decided to go to the bar together tonight. You suspect it has something to do with Jean. She wants them to start getting along so thereâs less friction when youâre all around each other.Â
At Jeanâs idea, Logan had muttered, âWhen hell freezes over,â in your ear before he had left for the night. Youâd gotten a little antsy without him to entertain you and had mistakenly blurted out the idea of going to visit them. Ororo had been dying to get out of the house and Jean was a little worried about her boyfriend as well. Theyâd agreed to go along with you and youâve felt a weight in your stomach ever since.Â
Your relationship with Logan was relatively new. Hell, a month ago youâd thought heâd hated you the same he did Scott. Youâd, of course, been proven wrong when youâd had a few drinks with him and things had taken a very physical turn.Â
You werenât sure if heâd just wanted a one-night stand or something serious. But when youâd tried to sneak out the next morning and heâd muttered a grumpy, âWhereâre you going?â Youâd gotten your answer.Â
You hadnât been on any real dates, there didnât ever seem to be time for them. But you spent most of your days together. Sometimes just silently enjoying each otherâs company, other times you would be holed up in one of your rooms cuddling. The thought always brings a stupid lovesick grin to your face.Â
Itâs one of your first real relationships and youâre worried that things are moving a little too fast. At least on your end. You can already tell that youâre falling for him. Headfirst into the deep end of love. And itâs terrifying because you truly cannot tell what he thinks about you. Clearly, he likes you. If he didnât, he wouldnât let you follow him around like a lost puppy.Â
But heâs never truly said anything to you. Thereâs no official label as to what you two are. You say girlfriend off-handly and you usually donât mean it when you reference yourself. Youâve never outright said heâs your boyfriend and heâs never really claimed you. Heâs made it explicitly clear he doesnât want you sleeping with other men, and youâve said the same to him about women. You both agreed on that, butâŠ
You kind of drive yourself crazy trying to figure this out. Heâs not vocal about his feelings and everythingâs still new so you donât like pressuring him. You also worry that if you push him too far heâll just get tired of you and move on. Itâs not fair to assume that of him, and you know everything would be better if you just talked to him. But youâre scared. Youâre scared the conversation will take the wrong direction and everything will blow up in your face.Â
Jean calls your name and your head shoots up to see both Ororo and Jean looking at you expectantly. You flush when you realize they must have been talking to you and youâd just completely zoned out thinking about Logan.Â
âHuh?â You blurt out, cringing at how dumb you sound.Â
Jean gives you a concerned look, âI can practically taste your anxiety.â The telepath frowns and offers you a comforting smile. âDonât worry about it, I promise, Logan wonât mind at all.â
âYouâre fine,â Ororo adds, because clearly the look on your face screams, I need constant validation. Theyâre not wrong, but still, you hate feeling like an exposed bundle of nerves. âThink of it as girlâs night, the boys just happen to be there.âÂ
You force a smile on your face and give your most enthusiastic nod. You change into the dress and finish up with your hair. You finally start chatting with them again, engaging so it might disguise just how nervous you feel.Â
Thereâs this clenching feeling, traveling from your stomach up to your chest. It makes you sick, makes you hurt. And itâs not because you think Logan will be upset with you for crashing. Heâd be relieved, if anything. Thereâs something else. Premonition isnât one of your abilities, but youâre seriously starting to doubt that now.Â
The bar is loud when you walk in. The soles of your shoes immediately start to stick to the floor and your nose screws up in disgust at the loud laughter coming from around the pool tables. You glance around, trying to see if you can spot Logan.Â
Youâd say you could spot him in any crowd. But has a propensity to hunker down and try to attract as little attention as possible so people donât bother him. âThere he is,â Jean taps your shoulders and points to the two men at the end of the bar.Â
Like youâd thought, Logan is hunched over his whiskey, glowering down at the wood under him like it had insulted him. You almost want to laugh at the sight. Some of the earlier anxiety eases its grip on you and you feel your shoulders begin to untense.Â
Before you can walk over Ororo grabs Jeanâs wrist. âGotta go to the bathroom,â she tugs Jean behind her.Â
Jean looks over her shoulder at you and smiles encouragingly, âGo to them, weâll catch up in a second.â You give her a tentative nod and slip through the crowd. There are more people here than you thought there would be.Â
Youâre happy not to spot any kids in the crowd. Youâve had a few too many nights out crashed by kids who thought they were good at sneaking out.Â
Itâs easy enough not to spot you or the other women in the crowd. Mutants have gotten good at blending in with the people around them. Makes it easier to get around. Itâs probably why neither Logan nor Scott stop their conversation as you approach. âSo,â Scott draws the word out, fingers tapping against the glass of his beer.Â
âDonât,â Logan warns. You want to laugh at his grumpy demeanor, but someoneâs accidentally elbowed you and you find yourself stumbling a few steps back. Itâs taking entirely too long to get to them, the bar isnât even that big. Thereâs just that many people here.Â
Scott ignores him and rolls his eyes. âLook, weâre stuck here for a while. Try and pull that stick out of your ass.â
âHow about I put one in yours?â Loganâs claws come out slightly. But then they both share an odd look and Scott smirks. âShut the fuck up,â Logan grouses, ânot like that.â
âRight,â Scott huffs out a laugh and shakes his head. He picks up his bottle and takes a long drink. Youâve nearly reached them now. You stop, though, when you hear Scott say your name. You shouldnât, you really shouldnât. Eavesdropping now is just asking to get hurt.Â
You drop back into the crowd, hoping the smells of others will stop Logan from discovering you lurking behind them both. Scott continues, âHowâs that going?â
You crane your neck forward, trying to hear them better over the karaoke happening behind you. Someone is butchering Britney Spears but you couldnât care less right now. Logan shouldnât answer. Since when has he ever shared anything with Scott?
So, imagine your surprise when his answer isnât immediately telling him to fuck off. âEh,â he shrugs, downing the rest of his whiskey. Your face drops in irritation. Seriously, all this skulking around for an Eh? Thatâs bullshit.Â
You keep yourself from stepping forward, forcing your feet still, and ignoring the little voice in the back of your head telling you this is a bad idea. Youâve committed this much, youâre seeing it through. Scott whistles lowly, âThat bad, huh?â Oh, fuck off, Summers.Â
Logan shakes his head and for a moment you have a brief feeling of hope lifting you up. âNah, not bad. Itâs just, I donât know.â Logan sits up and signals the bartender for a refill. Your snooping senses go off and you briefly see Ororo and Jean exiting the bathroom. Desperate for something to keep them at bay, you flick your wrist. The man in front of them tips his drink down Jeanâs shirt, slurring out apologies. Jean huffs and Ororo brings her back into the bathroom.Â
Scott and Logan somehow missed the whole interaction and you promise yourself that youâll pay for Jeanâs dry cleaning. Youâre definitely not going to. âThink she wants something I donât,â Logan tells Scott, and your heart plummets to your feet. You can practically see it deflate, all the lovesickness draining out of it and onto the floor of this grimy bar.Â
âLike, she just wants to fuck around?â
Logan shakes his head and downs another glass of whiskey. Heâs just swallowing it down like itâs water. At a certain point, the bartender gets sick of it and just leaves him with the bottle. âNo, she wants something real. Like a real relationship.â Scottâs brows furrow and Logan shrugs. âNot interested.âÂ
Itâs the way he says it that really bothers you. Thereâs nothing wrong with wanting something different in a relationship. It happens all the time. But he says it so dismissively. He knows that you want something real with him, something secure and loving. He knows that, continues to fuck you and lead you on, and then speaks as though youâre an idiot for ever being interested in that.Â
Hurt hasnât set in yet. Youâre staring wide-eyed, jaw agape with shock as you stare at Loganâs back. Youâd thought a conversation needed to be had. But you didnât think that he thought of you like this. Youâd thought you meant something to him.Â
Scott seems to share the sentiment, his lips tugged down into a frown. He leans against the bar, surveying Logan with a disbelieving look. âWhat?â Logan snaps.
Scott raises his hands in surrender, shaking his head and backing off. âNothing, man, I just thought you two were serious about each other.â You miss whatever Logan says as an arm slings itself around your shoulder.Â
âWhatâre you doing?â A husky, seductive voice whispers against the shell of your ear. You jump in shock, glaring at Ororo as she grins at you. She lets her arm slide off your shoulders and glances over at Jean. âI think she was spying.â
Jean nods, nudging you forward. âDefinitely spying. Hear anything good?â
You fortify your mind against her probing fingers before she can find out. âNope,â you blurt out. You hope the racing of your heart is dismissed by your constantly frazzled nature. You hope the look on your face is explained by your earlier boredom and anxiety. You pray that none of them notice the way you lean away from Logan when the men finally turn around and notice you all.Â
Scott breathes out a dramatic sigh of relief and slumps onto Jean. âThank god, I thought I was going to die trying to talk to this brick wall.â his eyes flick towards you in a blink-and-you-miss-it moment. Thereâs a brief pitying look before he grins. âCome to get your boyfriend?â Thereâs a heavy emphasis on the word that you never would have noticed had you not heard their conversations.Â
Itâs clearly a petty dig at Logan. And you would appreciate it if you didnât feel the sudden urge to vomit up your dinner. âThought you might need saving from Logan.â You tell him, a chuckle hiding the slight tremor in your voice.Â
Youâre not sure if he does, but you hope Logan notices how you avoided the word boyfriend. You hope that he hurts the same way you do. But you know, deep down, that he doesnât care. Heâs probably relieved that you didnât use the title.Â
Logan gets off his stool, he wraps his arm around your shoulder, and pulls you into a brief hug. His lips press against your temple before he dips down to whisper, âThank you,â in your ear.
Asshole, heâs not allowed to smile at you the way he is. If you werenât in such a crowded place and already overstimulated, youâd shove him away. If your friends werenât watching youâd take his arm and slam it down onto the bar until you hear his fucking adamantium bones break.Â
That might have been too far. Maybe youâre not that angry, but youâre hurt.
You place your hands against his chest, a thin smile on your lips while you hum a simple, âMhm.â He doesnât seem to notice the way you push away from him. Itâs easily dismissed by you cheekily stealing his seat at the bar.Â
He comes up behind you, hands bracketing you and keeping you stuck against the bar while you order your drink. One of his hands drifts down, laying against your thigh. You know this isnât sexual, this is him comforting you.Â
He shouldnât know how horrible you feel in such busy places. He shouldnât know that and know that his touch is grounding and then help you. Not if he doesnât want something serious. If he didnât want to be your boyfriend, didnât want to be anything but a fuck, then why do this to you? Did he not think this was leading you on? Is this just him caring for you?
Youâll drown in a sea of unanswered questions before the night is over if you linger too long. You tip your head back, let your shot burn its way down your throat, and turn towards the others with a smile. You feel your worries fade and your focus loosen as you simply drift further into your mind.Â
You must have disassociated or something. By the time you realize youâre no longer hearing bad karaoke and your elbows arenât sticking to the bar, youâre already home. You stare in the mirror, hand pausing as you brush your teeth before you quickly finish.Â
You didnât drink much, you never do. It fucks with your abilities and causes migraines. You rinse your mouth out and glance into your bedroom. Logan groans and stretches. His back bows, muscles flexing and you rip your eyes away. You canât let yourself be distracted by the chest you want to drape yourself across.Â
You need to talk to him. Itâs never been more clear. You wipe your mouth and toss the towel onto the rim of the sink. You take in a deep breath, trying to get rid of the nerves plaguing you. Itâs never worked before, itâs not going to suddenly cure you now.Â
You give up on the thought and instead, shove down the anxiety until you have enough confidence to speak. It takes a little while, Logan peaks an eye open, eyebrows quirked when he sees you just staring at him. âSomething up, bub?â he flexes, on purpose, and you roll your eyes. You grab his shirt out of your hamper and toss it at him.Â
âPut this on. Canât think when you look like that.â
He chuckles, âThatâs the point.â at your pointed glare his smile drops and he tugs the beater on. It barely does anything to deter you. If anything youâre having more trouble paying attention. Especially now that his full attention is on you. The humor is gone from the room, a thick tension replaces it. Logan seems to feel it, sitting up straighter and glaring at you like heâs trying to read your mind. âWhatâs wrong?â Itâs a demand more than a question.Â
Itâs hard to look at him. But you refuse to let yourself cower now. You take in a fortifying breath and let your gaze bore into his. You put all the hurt and anger you feel into it, willing yourself to be firm. âWe need to talk.â
ââBout what?â Heâs brusque, but thereâs a slight concern to his tone.Â
Thereâs no point hiding this. And maybe you had misheard, maybe there was a conversation prefacing the one youâd heard. And youâll talk it out and everything will be okay. âI heard you and Scott talking at the bar.â
The hope you had, as minimal as it was, is dashed at your feet. He sucks in a deep breath and the look on his face has you crestfallen. You can feel your chest cave in. You feel so stupid all of a sudden. Constantly following after him, even before you started dating him. Looking at him with stars in your eyes and latching onto his every move and word.Â
Youâd worshiped him, put him up on a pedestal he didnât deserve. Superhuman or not, at the end of the day he was still a man. And theyâve done nothing but disappoint you. You suck your teeth, gaze dropping to your feet as you fight back the tears in your eyes. âRight,â you whisper, stepping back from him.Â
âLook,â he starts. You force your eyes up and watch as he rubs uncomfortably at the back of his neck. He takes a step towards you and you shake your head, stepping away from him. His arms fall to his sides and he sighs. âSorry,â he mutters.
âThatâs it?â You demand, tone incredulous. You werenât some great love or anything. But thatâs seriously all he has to say.
He opens his mouth, eyes softening as he stares at you. Then he snaps it shut, something covers his face and his expression is borderline cruel as he sneers at you. âNot my fault you got in over your head, kid. Never said I wanted anything more with you.â He points at you, and you suddenly feel like a little girl getting scolded. Youâve never had a partner make you feel this small, especially not Logan. âYou were just convenient.â
You rear back like he slapped you. You think it might have hurt less than that. To know you wasted so much time on such a fucking dick makes you want to throw up. Or scream, or cry. You canât decide on one. But your powers can, the walls are shaking, knick-knacks falling off your shelves as energy pulses from you.Â
Youâll face the hurt, the sadness, the horrible ache of rejection later. Right now, you need him out of your face before you bring the whole mansion crumbling down around you. âOut.â You grind the word out, turning away from him and clutching your hands to your chest. You take in quick, rapid breaths, trying to think of anything other than how horrible you feel.Â
You havenât lost control like this in a long time. Youâre not going to give him the satisfaction of being the reason you get put on probation again. He whispers your name, coming up behind you like heâs going to touch you.Â
You want to lash out, want to hurt him like heâs hurt you. But youâll only cause more damage than necessary. Heâs not worth hurting the kids in the rooms around you. You shove past him, ignoring the way he shouts your name.Â
You dart out into the hall, grateful there are so few people milling around. Nearly everyoneâs asleep, just a few stragglers finishing up their homework for tomorrow. A few of them give you odd looks that turn concerned when they see Logan chasing after you. Your bones are practically vibrating by the time you make it outside.Â
You rush towards the grove of trees at the back of the mansion. Your knees give out under you before you can make it very far. Energy pulses out of you in an explosive circle. You hear bark crack and turn into nothing but dust as the air around you trembles.Â
Itâs a relief, like going to the bathroom after holding it all day. You feel it drain away from you, a plug pulled out as the energy rushes from you. It slows after a minute, feeling more like a leak than a steady stream.Â
Your hands shake by your sides as you lay trembling on the grass. Your eyelids flutter shut and you try and keep them open but itâs hard. All of your energy had been spent keeping yourself in check until you made it out of the mansion.Â
âIâve got you,â a voice mutters near your ear. Familiar strong arms dip under your knees, lifting you up and pulling you into a sturdy chest. You recognize the body, recognize the uncomfortable warmth coming from him. But your tongue wonât work and you're passing out before you can try and push him away.Â
Youâre in your own bed when you wake up again. Youâre briefly comforted by the warm feeling of the sheets around you before you realize how cold the other side of the bed is. Youâre so used to the feeling of someone being beside you that itâs jarring for no one to be there. You sit up, a spark of anxiety lighting up inside you before itâs being quelled by an outside force.Â
âI think itâs best if we keep that under control.â Youâre not surprised to hear Charlesâs voice. You canât be, not when heâs actively keeping you calm and placid. You lean back against your headboard. You tilt your head lazily, looking at him while he looks out the window.Â
âThat tree was a hundred years old.â
You wince, face screwing up when you remember the large oak tree you obliterated last night. âI can remake it,â you promise.Â
âYou could,â he corrects, âbut whatever happened last night between you and Logan is causing your powers to be volatile.â He finally turns towards you, the motor of his wheelchair a dull buzz as he smiles at you. Thereâs no resentment in his gaze at least. Youâd known he wouldnât be mad at you. He was used to accidents like this. Had you hurt another person, however, this would be an entirely different conversation.Â
Thereâs a dull ache in your chest at the mention of Logan, but itâs quickly covered by another wave of calm from Charles. He smiles and holds out two metal bracelets. Theyâre thick, something red inlaid into the black metal. They look like handcuffs more than anything. His lips quirk up at your thought and you frown.Â
âThatâs what they are, right? Cuffs.â
âYouâre not a criminal,â he assuages, his tone gentle as you take them from him. Thereâs a small silver button inside that you click and the metal springs open. You place your left wrist inside and it snaps shut, itâs a snug fit. It wonât be moving around anytime soon. You put the right one on and feel Charlesâ hold on your mind ease the second it's closed. Every horrible feeling from last night crashes down on you and you nearly choke on it.Â
You wonder how Charles managed to keep you asleep for so long without the roof crumbling. He chuckles, the noise tired. âJean helped me. It took a while for the cuffs to be ready.â
The way he says that causes alarms to go off in your head. âHow long?â He takes in a sharp breath and shakes his head, attempting to dismiss the question. âCharles,â you snap, voice bordering on a shout.Â
âTwo days,â he says. You gasp and slump back against your sheets. He says your name but you get to your feet and pace. You don't know what to do with yourself. Thereâs energy buzzing under your skin, but the cuffs are keeping it at bay. It feels wrong like your pores are being clogged with acid.Â
âTwo days.â You look over at him, horror painting your face and you can see why he was so apprehensive to tell you. âItâs never been that bad before.â
âNo,â he starts cautiously, âIt hasnât. Which makes me wonder, what transpired between you and Logan that destroyed my grandfatherâs tree?âÂ
You cringe at the mention of the tree. Heâs never going to let go of that. Even when you recreate it, heâs still going to hold it over your head. His teasing eases you out of the spiral you were heading down and you glance over at him. âYouâve been in my head for two days. Iâm sure both you and Jean already know.â
He smacks his lips together and shrugs, clasping his hands in front of himself. âSimply seeing if you wanted to discuss it, my dear.â
You vehemently shake your head and sit back down on your bed. âNo, I donât want to talk about him. I don't want to see him.â Charles gives you a look like he doesnât believe you and you hate it. You truly donât want to see Logan again. Just thinking about him makes you want to explode. He was a pig and you regret ever wasting your time on him.Â
Thereâs a shriveled part of your heart weeping somewhere, but you crush in your fist until it shuts the fuck up. âRight,â Charles nods. âI do believe itâs best for your recovery that we keep you two separated for a while.â He rolls past you and places a comforting hand on yours. âRest, youâll feel more like yourself soon.â
You nod and watch him leave. Exhaustion suddenly seems to drop its heavy weight on your shoulders. Two days being restrained by telepaths probably wasnât very restful. You lay across your comforter, rolling over and hoping when you wake up your heart will be healed.Â
Two weeks. Two pathetic, snot-filled, and disgusting weeks of sobbing over Logan. You felt like a sixteen-year-old again, crying over the boy that didnât like you back. It was awful, especially knowing that the entirety of the mansion knew what was wrong with you.Â
Your students would leave your class and you would lock your doors, hiding under your desk as you wept. Those with superhearing or telepathy would bake you cookies and leave gifts at your door. It was sweet, but honestly made you feel ten times worse. You felt like your sadness was a burden you were forcing everyone to carry.Â
Your mother would be so disappointed in you. Sheâd always told you that you mourn a relationship half the amount of time you were in it. Of course, hers never lasted more than a few weeks. And sheâd had more boyfriends than you could count on three hands.Â
Besides, you were allowed to wallow for a while. This was someone you were starting to fall for. To be so blind going into and leaving the relationship was awful. Having the rug ripped out from under you had been cruel and needless. Youâre resentful and grateful heâd been so horrifically honest with you. On one hand, if the relationship had just ended, youâd be pining after him. Wondering what youâd done to lose such an amazing guy.Â
But being faced with the brutal truth, knowing he was a piece of shit, it makes you hate yourself. You should have seen it. Should have known that he didnât want you like you wanted him. But there were never any signs. Youâd run it through your head a million times. Every interaction youâve ever had with him. None of it shows you where heâd been lying to you or using you. You canât even trust yourself anymore.Â
Thereâs a loud knock on your door and you sniffle, tossing another tissue in the trash as you go to answer it. âHello?â You croak. You can barely see, eyes puffy and so swollen your vision is blurry.Â
âHoly hell,â Ororo scoffs and shakes her head. She pushes into your room and slams the door shut before anyone can see how awful you look. To be fair, you keep yourself relatively put together during the day. But itâs after hours now, youâre allowed to be a mess.Â
âYou look like shit.âÂ
Neither of you are prepared as you begin to blubber. Your lips tremble and your voice shakes as you begin to sob. âI know,â you wail. âI hate it.â Ororoâs eyes widen in horror and she quickly pushes you into your desk chair, grabbing a box of tissues and shoving it in your hands.Â
âI feel,â you stutter, having to take in a few shuddering breaths before you can get the words out. âHe tore out my heart and ripped it up with his stupid fucking claws.â
âOkay, okay,â Ororo runs her hands over your arms, trying to soothe you. âI know, sh, itâs okay.â She groans, âStop crying,â she pleads under her breath.Â
âIâm trying!â You snap at her, running hands over your wet cheeks and trying to swallow down the rest of your tears.Â
âLook,â she steps back and shakes her head. She glances down at you, disgust poorly hidden on her face. Sheâs really fucking bad at comforting someone. âThis is awful, I canât take it anymore. You two keep dancing around each other and youâre putting everyone on edge. You wonât stop crying and he keeps going off,â she holds her hands up and shakes her head. âI just canât do it anymore.â
You frown, brows turning down in confusion. âWhat?â You didnât think Logan would be mad. You pictured him skipping through a field of daisies, happy to finally be rid of you. It only made you hate yourself more that you were still crying over it all.Â
âHeâs kind of losing it,â she seems reluctant to relent the information. âLook,â she kneels in front of you and snatches the tissue box from your hand. She tosses it to the side and forces you to meet her eyes. âHeâs in love with you. We all know it, Jeanâs confirmed it. He loves you, he needs you, heâs just terrified to admit it. Heâs afraid of what's going to happen if you two become real.â
Your eyes widen with the realization. She nods enthusiastically as you connect the pieces. You canât deny whatâs so plainly laid in front of you when she assures you that even Jean knows. Jean knowing means she just did a nosy dive into his head.Â
You can picture what could happen. With rom-com levels of nauseating romance, you run to find him. You tell him you donât care that heâs afraid. You donât care he pushed you away and you do love him. Heâs not going to lose you. Nothing can rip you apart. You ride off into the sunset on Scottâs bike blah blah blah.Â
This isnât a fucking romance. And youâre not going to cry over a man who's too much of a pussy to admit he has feelings. You like men who have emotional depth deeper than a teaspoon. âAre you fucking kidding me?"
Ororoâs face blanches and she slowly backs away from you as you stand. âNo,â she answers slowly, like sheâs not sure of herself now.Â
âThatâs what Iâve been crying over?â You feel upset for an entirely different reason. You never misread the signs. You never missed a hint that he didnât feel what you did. He did! He was just happier letting you doubt yourself and the love you held for him than admitting he felt something. You tear off the depression hoodie youâve been living in for the past two weeks. âYouâve got to be fucking kidding me!â
You donât know where youâre going. Normally, youâd run into a forest to let out a blast of energy. It drained you enough that you wouldnât have to feel anything. But with these cuffs on, you canât do anything.Â
You storm out of your room and stomp down the stairs, uncaring who you wake up. Youâve wasted so much time on Logan, you refuse to stay in your room and cry for another fucking night.Â
âI want to see her,â Logan growls. He tries to move around Charles, but he stops him with his mind, holding him in place while Jean disappears inside your room. Logan watches her go and glares at her retreating back as the door closes behind her.Â
Itâs been a day already, youâve never needed to be out for more than a few hours. He doesnât want to think that thereâs anything wrong with you, that he might have permanently broken something inside you.Â
That talk at the bar with Scott had been stupid. He would have said anything to get him to shut the fuck up and leave him alone. He didnât really mean what he said, he just wanted him to back off. And saying that your relationship wasnât anything was quicker than pouring out every thought heâs had of you.Â
It was easier lying than it was to admit just how much he wanted you. Just how far he would go for you. But then youâd overheard, and you brought it up. And thereâd been faith on your face. Like even you couldnât believe what he had said because you could see through the bullshit.Â
But all Logan had seen was a way out. This was an opportunity to finally get out of the suffocating clutches of something he didnât want to admit was love. He took the chance before he could think. Itâs what he was used to. Taking the easy way out, especially when it came to shit like emotions.Â
He hadnât thought you were going to explode, though. Because thatâs exactly what youâd done. By the time heâd caught up to you, youâd burned a crater into the ground and had destroyed Charlesâ stupid fucking tree.Â
Seeing you like that, laying there lifeless, it terrified him. He didnât want to live in a world that you werenât in. There was no fucking point. It was sobering, realizing that, and then realizing that he was the reason you were like that in the first place.Â
He didnât want to live without you and he certainly would never be able to come to terms with being the reason you were dead. But it didnât matter, whatever realizations he was coming to. Charles and Jean were completely blocking him from your room. They werenât even giving him a chance to look at you. And he was about five seconds away from ripping the old bastardâs head off and just barrelling inside.Â
He didnât care what they said, he needed to see that you were okay. âIâm afraid youâre not going to be able to see her for a very long time.â
âStay out of my head,â Logan growls, glaring down at the man. âWhat are you talking about?â He presses, finally processing the rest of his sentence.
Charles sighs and rolls away from him. Logan glares at his back but ultimately follows. âYou were the cause of this, yes?â Reluctantly, Logan nods, thereâs no point in hiding it. Heâs sure Charles already knows. âFor her own safety, the two of you will need to remain separated.â
That had been it. There was no arguing about it. No fighting Charles. It was for your safety that he stayed away from you. No matter how much he wanted to explain himself, he wouldnât risk another meltdown like that.Â
You didnât deserve to get hurt because of someone like him. He wouldnât be able to stand hurting you again.Â
But two weeks seemed like a lot. At a certain point, heâs sure youâre just avoiding him. He knows he canât blame you. Heâd been a fucking idiot. But that didnât make him any happier. If anything, he was getting more and more pissed off every day.Â
He had less patience for mistakes. Was lashing out at the kids more often and donât even get started on the petty fucking fights he was picking with Scott. How long did you fucking need before you talked to him again?
He knows youâre upset, your crying keeps everyone up at night. Something heâs sure youâd be mortified to learn about. Why wonât you let him comfort you? Why do you have to be so petulant, running around the corner every time you see him? Pointedly ignoring him when youâre in the same room together.Â
He could fix this, make this all better. But youâre just not letting him. He knows this is why he loves you. Itâs why he was so drawn to you. You seem like a bundle of nerves, constantly flitting around and keeping yourself small. It had been off-putting at first. And then heâd seen you training with Scott, kicking his ass more like. A switch had been flicked in his head.Â
He could finally see you for what you were. He finally realized that it was your abilities you were keeping small. You were a fucking spitfire and you didnât hesitate to tell him off, he loved it. Loved arguing with you just so he could see you get all pissed off.Â
But that stubborn attitude he loved was really biting him in the ass right now.Â
Thereâs a knock on his bedroom door and he doesnât even get to pretend itâs going to be you. He smells Jeanâs perfume and rolls his eyes. He puffs on his cigar and contemplates ignoring her.
âDonât be a jackass, open the damn door.âÂ
Fuckinâ telepaths. âWhat?â He snaps at her the second the door is open. Her face screws up when she smells the smoke from his cigar. He knows she wants to put it out, and can see it in the twitch of her fingers. He raises a brow, a silent challenge to try him. Heâs itching for another fight and she can feel it.Â
She lets out a sharp breath, choosing her battles wisely and backing off. Heâs almost disappointed. âWe need to talk. This whole thing between the two of you is ridiculous. Youâre a mess, sheâs a messâŠâ
Her voice trails off into nothing more than the annoying pitch of a fly. Logan canât be bothered to listen to her scold him. Heâs not a fucking kid, and maybe if you were acting like an adult, they wouldnât be having this problem.Â
A few doors down he can hear you shouting, then the door to your room slams open. He darts off his bed, opening his own door to see what youâre doing. He only sees the back of your head as you angrily stomp down the stairs.Â
Enough is fucking enough, he was finishing this now. He was sick of your side of the bed being empty and the stupid fucking glare on your face every time you saw him. He doesnât even bother saying anything to Jean as he leaves, just chases after you.Â
Jean watches him go with a perturbed look. She steps out of the room and glances down the hall. Ororo steps out of your room and walks towards her. âWell?â Jean probes.Â
Ororor shrugs, âSheâs over it.â Jean smiles but itâs quickly wiped off her face by Ororoâs expression. âNot in the way we wanted.
Jean clenches her eyes shut and takes in a deep breath. She needs you two to figure your shit out or sheâs never going to be able to get a good nightâs sleep again.
You find yourself in the gym. Itâs not your favorite place in the world, you donât usually get to train with the others. Youâre stuck with telepaths, mainly the ones who can shut your powers down if you get too out of control. That hasnât been a problem since you got the cuffs, but youâve been too sad to test them out.Â
Now you find yourself obliterating a punching bag. You wrap the energy around your fists and let it protect the thin skin as you pummel into the bag. You donât know what else to do. You canât have energy meltdowns anymore. You have to try and funnel it all out physically, but itâs not working. Nothing is.Â
âImagining itâs me?â You pause midswing. You glance over to the door just in time to see Logan stalking towards you. He unzips his jacket slowly. So slowly it almost seems provocative. He tugs it off and tosses it onto a nearby bench.Â
You scoff as you watch him. âDo you ever have a shirt on?â
He shrugs and moves towards the ring in the middle of the gym. His movements are lithe and fluid as he hops onto the ring, every bit a wild animal. You watch as the muscles in his torso ripple and force your eyes off of him. You try and focus your attention back on the bag, but all your earlier energy is gone. Your mind is completely wrapped around Logan.Â
Which youâre sure is exactly what he wants, or he wouldnât be staring at you so smugly as he leans against the ropes and waits for you to acknowledge him. You suck on your teeth, irritation blooming in sporadic bursts throughout your body that has you nearly shaking. Finally, you give in.Â
He smirks the second your eyes meet, âI can take it, sweetheart. A lot better than that little toy of yours can.â He nods towards the punching bag but the insinuation isnât lost on you. You and Logan had been very active in your relationship. You could barely go a day without tasting each other.Â
Youâve been pent up since the breakup. Youâd given in a few days ago, pulled out your old vibrator, and tried to bring even a semblance of joy back into your life. But nothing could compare to Logan.Â
His tongue darts out, wetting his lips as he waits for you to react. Heâs standing there, staring down at you with all the surety in the world that youâre going to fuck him. It makes you want to dig your nails in and rip him apart, bit by bit.Â
You can already picture it in your mind, using your abilities to pick him apart until heâs nothing but molecules dispersed through the air. Heâs lucky you have the cuffs on, without them youâre sure heâd already be dead.Â
You smirk and move towards the edge of the ring, your voice drops as you purr up at him, âYou wanna play, Logan?â
He grins and moves off the ropes, starting towards you as you make your way onto the ring. Youâre slightly less graceful than he was, but youâre too focused on wiping the smug look off his face to pay attention. âCome on kid,â he taunts, voice as low as it usually is when heâs fucking into you. âLetâs see what you got.â
Youâre not stupid enough to just outright swing at him. You feint to the right and bring your knee up into his ribs. He only needs one hand to wrap around your thigh and drag you forward. His other hand goes to your hip, tugging you closer until youâre practically grinding against each other. You grit your teeth and glare up at him.Â
âCome on, sweetheart, that canât be all you got for me.â Energy wraps around your head, blurring the air around you. You slam your temple against his, it provides enough of a distraction for you to yank your leg out of his grip. You throw your right fist into his ear, bouncing back with a grin as he shakes his head.Â
He practically growls as he reorients himself. You shrug and smirk, âWhat, donât tell me thatâs all you got, wolvie.â
âDonât fuckinâ call me that,â he grumbles. You open your mouth, prepared to taunt him again. But heâs lunging towards you and you just barely have enough time to dart out of his way. You know heâs going easy on you. He could have had you just then if he really wanted this.Â
But heâs dragging this out. Forcing you to spend as much time with him as you can. It only pisses you off further. You plant your foot on his back and kick him forward. He barely even stumbles and it only further confirms your suspicions. âStop fucking holding back,â you yell at him.Â
He turns around slowly. You almost expect there to be a sneer on his face, something angry. Instead, he looks fucking thrilled, like this is all just foreplay for him. He laughs, so low you can barely hear it, and his chest flexes as his claws come out.Â
âYou sure?â Itâs a taunt, a dare, he knows you arenât going to take the bait. Youâd be stupid to, you donât heal like he does. Once those things get in you, youâre screwed. But right now, youâre too pissed off to try and care.Â
You donât say anything, you just duck under his fist as he swings at you. You know he made it easy for you, giving you an opening to fall into. Heâs treating you like youâre something fragile. And maybe you are. One wrong move in this fight and you might not make it through the night. But anger is making you blind to logic.Â
Him playing fair just makes you want to play dirty. You use the opening he gives you, letting energy form around your fist and pulling back just enough to slam into his ribs. He coughs, doubling over as you hear bones crack under your hit. Heâll heal in seconds, you canât bring yourself to feel too bad for him.Â
Maybe if he ever took you seriously you might not be such a bitch. But he didnât think you were good enough to be honest with and he still was treating you like a plaything. In your opinion, he deserves whatever you give him and more. He doubles over and you swing your leg around, bringing it down across his face.Â
You hear a crack as your socked foot connects with his face, something crunches underneath you. And when your sole hits the mat again you see the blood leaking from his nose. You almost apologize. Almost, then you see the look on his face. His pupils are swallowing the hazel of his eyes, lips parted as he pants through his teeth. He looks fucking animalistic.Â
You have no warning as he pounces on you. His lips smother your own, moving over you with little to no grace. Thereâs nothing romantic or gentle about this. His fingers are digging so hard into your shirt, youâre sure you hear the seams rip. But you canât bring yourself to care.Â
One of your hands goes to his hair, tugging at the roots until heâs groaning into your mouth. You rake your nails up his back roughly. He cusses against your lips, hand traveling up to your chin so he can roughly jerk you back.Â
He stares down at you, a silent question on his face. Youâve barely nodded before heâs descending upon you again. Lips and teeth clash borderline painfully as he lowers you onto the mat. Youâre missing all the usual love and tenderness he treats you with, but you donât care.Â
You want to be rough. You want to hurt him like he hurt you, make him ache for you the way you do him. You wrap your legs around his, lifting your pelvis until you have enough leverage to flip him. Your thighs straddle his waist and you grind down against the prominent bulge in his sweatpants.Â
He groans into your open mouth, large palms grabbing at your ass and spreading you so he can thrust between your clothed thighs. You canât help but moan at the friction. Itâs just enough to keep you on edge, he pulls back every time you think you might be close to something real building.Â
You rip your mouth off his. He glares up at you as you grab his hair and yank his head back. You slam his head hard enough into the mat for it to echo through the room and he growls against your grip. You grin down at him as you slowly get off him. You make a show of stripping, enjoying the way his eyes track your movements. He looks like a dog, panting and waiting for his treat.Â
Youâre tempted to get yourself off, making him watch, and then leave him straining against his sweatpants. But you need this bad, need him to scratch the itch you canât reach so you can finally get him out of your head. Neither of you are patient as he jerks his sweatpants down just enough for his cock to pop out.Â
Itâs already leaking from the tip like a faucet. You kneel, straddling his waist again. You donât have to do much to slick him up. You pump him a few times before heâs gripping your wrist and jerking your hand away. âGet up here,â he commands, voice rough as he grips your hips. You donât even get a chance to protest before heâs flipping you over.Â
He grabs your thighs and wraps them around his waist. Your ass is off the ground, hovering above his lap as he lines up with your slit. You moan when the tip rubs against your clit. âWhose teasing now?â You grit out, glaring at him.Â
His lips curl up, that insufferable smirk on his face before he slams into you. The attitude is practically fucked out of you as he starts pumping in and out. You groan, raking your hands down his chest. He fucking moans at the pain, blood blooming under your nails and immediately closing the further down you go.Â
Neither of you are giving up this fight, you donât want to lose, not even while youâre fucking. He pulls out of you and flips you over so fast you donât even have time to whine. Heâs back in you before you can blink, hips slapping into you in a way that you know is going to leave bruises tomorrow. Youâre not going to be able to sit for a week and he knows it. His hands are groping at the skin of your ass, pulling you apart and watching the skin ripple as he fucks into you.Â
Youâre not going to last long. Youâve been too desperate, too pent up while youâve been pissed off at him. He leans over you, draping himself across you lazily. You groan at the added weight, it only adds to the sensation, only makes you want him deeper inside you. âThought you didnât want me anymore, sweetheart.â He whispers in your ear and you flutter around him as his hand snakes around your waist, rubbing tight circles on your clit.Â
You open your mouth but all that comes out is disjointed moans. You know thereâs something sarcastic in there, and he must know too because he laughs at your pathetic mumbled sentence. âI donât know,â he leans back and watches as he makes room for himself inside you. âSeem to need me real bad now.â
Your nails dig into the mat, energy leaking through your fingertips and warming up the canvas beneath you. You can feel it fluctuating, fighting against the cuffs the closer he brings you to the edge. âFuck you,â the words escape you at a particularly deep thrust and you struggle to keep your eyes open.Â
He pauses and you nearly cry at the loss of movement. âSorry, couldnât hear you. Whatâd you say? Stop?â
You glare over your shoulder at him âDonât you fucking dare, Logan.â You let your power push up against his back, forcing his hips to move again. He chuckles at the move, fingers creating figure eights on your nub.Â
âWouldnât dream of it, sweetheart,â he protests, voice innocent. âAh, fuck,â his voice is nothing more than low grunts and groans in your ear the closer the both of you get to your release. You canât speak anymore, canât think. You can feel it cresting higher and higher inside you.Â
Your abilities are rising with your release. Theyâre pushing against the cuffs, fighting desperately against the control the foreign metal has on your powers. You can feel it, heat building up under your skin, like a tingling on the tip of your tongue that you just canât reach. Itâs Loganâs release that finally tips you over the edge.Â
The way his breath catches and his hips stutter in their perfect rhythm as warmth floods you from the inside out. You can feel it, him, dribbling down your thighs and staining the mat beneath you. It has you clenching around him, pushing your hips back weakly while you let the feeling overwhelm you. You nearly black out. Two weeks without him hadnât felt long until you remembered what you were missing.Â
You lose your sense of time, dropping to the mat like your bones have gone liquid, dripping out of you. You can feel Logan draped over you still, his weight a comforting blanket that nearly has you drifting to sleep. Naked, in the middle of the boxing ring. He pulls out of you and you whimper at the loss.Â
He shushes you, rubbing a hand up your spine and pressing a gentle kiss to the side of your temple. He wraps his arms around you, laying down and pulling you back into his chest. It takes a few minutes of quiet cuddling for you to remember what exactly led you down to the gym in the first place.Â
You feel disgusted with yourself for giving in to him so easily. Itâs clear what his plan had been. And youâd fallen for it hook, line, and sinker. Youâd barely even fought against him. Of course, you could reason that you needed to get the tension out. This was the perfect way to funnel out your built-up energy.Â
But youâre disgusted with yourself for giving in to him so easily. You just disregarded dignity and self-respect for a chance to get him between your legs. You were such a fucking idiot. No wonder this is all he wanted you for.Â
âShit,â you mutter, trying to pull yourself out of his grip. Your eyes widen as his arms tighten around your waist. He tugs you back down until heâs got you in what essentially feels like a headlock. He could easily pass it off as spooning, but it feels a little more demanding than that. âLogan,â you warn, the silent peace of the moment officially shattered.Â
âDonât,â he gripes. You can fight against him for as long as you want, but youâll only tire yourself out. His arms are literally metal bands around you. âLet me talk and then you can run off.â You huff and wait, but he never speaks. Finally, you look over your shoulder and glare at him. âWell?â
You roll your eyes, âFuckâs sake,â you mutter. âAlright, speak.â
You can feel his grin against the back of your head. If he didnât have you in such a tight grip, youâd elbow him in the gut just to be petty. âI made a mistake,â you scoff and he keeps going. Stopping you from interrupting him with something bitchy. âYou werenât just something convenient to me, sweetheart.â he pauses and chuckles, âYouâre a huge fucking pain in my ass.â
âIs this your idea of an apology?â You snap, âBecause this is pathetic.âÂ
He doesnât say anything and youâre tempted to snark at him again. But then the world is flipped on its side as he jerks you around and forces you to face him. Your chests rub together, the sweaty skin sticking together and bordering on uncomfortable. âYou ever shut up?â He asks, but thereâs no heat to the words. If anything he looks fond of you, and it makes you shift around, trying not to look him in the eye. But thereâs nowhere for you to hide, youâre both naked and bare before each other.Â
Youâre as physically vulnerable as he must feel emotionally. And as much as this is a horrible way to display how heâs feeling, youâre starting to understand him a little better. You know why this conversation is so hard for him, why he canât accept that someone truly loves him and he loves her back.Â
But thatâs not going to get him out of it. Heâs still yet to say the words. Maybe if he manned up and said something real youâd consider forgiving him. You give him an expectant look and he sighs, forehead pressed against yours as he slumps over you. You want to pretend youâre annoyed at the contact, but youâve been craving it since you ran away two weeks ago.
Youâve been desperate for this warmth that only he can provide you. Without realizing it, you nuzzle further into his chest, hands drifting up to wrap around his bare waist. Logan feels the tightness in him ease slightly at the way you curl into him. Heâs got a shot, even if you try and tell him he doesnât. Â
Itâs silent for a while, while you linger in the emotions of what just happened and he tries to find the right words. He leans down, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear and smiling against the shell of your ear. âI love you,â he whispers.Â
Youâd told yourself youâd only consider forgiving him if he said those words. But thatâs only because youâd never thought he would actually say it. You didnât think he was capable of admitting that to himself. It seems so out of character for him. But, maybe, you donât know him as well as you thought you did.Â
He pulls back, hand landing on your jaw and gently guiding your head out of his neck. He gives you an expectant look but youâre finding it hard to meet his eyes. Youâve been waiting for him to say that, but now it feels like you canât. Youâre still struggling to forgive him. He put you through so much unnecessary hurt just because he couldnât face his own feelings.Â
And now youâre struggling to do the same. âI want to say it back,â you tell him. âBut how am I supposed to trust that the next time things get hard, you wonât lash out again?â
He frowns, an irritated huff of breath shooting out his nose. But you know itâs frustration towards himself. For letting you both get to this point because he couldnât just say three words. âIâll wait,â he promises. âFor as long as it takes, Iâll wait.âÂ
You smile and nod, wrapping your arms around him and burying your face in his neck. Youâre sure youâll be saying it sooner rather than later. But whatâs the harm in making him squirm a little? He deserves it.Â
A/N: I donât write smut, itâs literally in my rules. I think I stared at a gif of him for too long and some horny ass demon possessed me and made me write this. Forgive me, universe, Iâm no better than a man.
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
Kid?
Logan Howlett x fem!mutant!reader A/N: I havenât watched X-Men since I was a child, so I canât promise this is going to be canon-compliant. I havenât watched DP & W either, Iâve just been influenced by that one gif where Hugh Jackman shakes his head like a dog. I feel FERAL Also, I am not good at superhero names or coming up with creative powers. So youâre a mutant with matter manipulation and they call you Flux. I mean, superhero names are inherently ridiculous so I think this works. (Donât judge me, Iâm just here for the sexy man) Summary: You walk in on Logan and Jean in a compromising position and feel your heart break. You really thought he loved you, you were so wrong. (Or were you?)
It was your own fault, you should have knocked before you busted through the door. You only have yourself to blame as you struggle to catch your breath and swallow down the lump in your throat. The image of Logan standing between Jeanâs bare legs is going to haunt you for a while. Their faces will keep you awake at night, cringing at yourself while you remember the humiliating moment.Â
You rush towards the door, a stupidly giddy skip to your step. You were a mutant, a superhuman, and getting a chance to talk to your crush should not have you giggling like a schoolgirl. Still, youâre blind to all logic when it comes to Logan.Â
You turn the corner, spotting the medbay and nearly ramming into the door you know heâs lurking behind. Charles had told you where to find him. Of course, you hadnât paid attention to the odd tone of voice when he had very clearly warned you to knock. All youâd heard was Loganâs name and youâd zoned out for the rest of the conversation.Â
And, of course, you donât knock. You grab the doorâs handle and bust in, âHey!â Your eyes widen and your stomach plummets with a depressing plop to the floor. Your eyes nearly bug out of your head when you see the way Jean and Logan are entangled in each other. Heâs leaning over her, the muscles and veins in his neck pulsing with strain. Normally, that sight would have you nearly drooling.Â
Instead, all you can see is the flush on Jeanâs cheeks and the way her pupils are dilated with want. Her nails are digging into his back, bare legs twined around his waist. Thereâs no way to misinterpret this. No way for you to later assure yourself that this was all just a misunderstanding.Â
The words stumble out of your mouth in a disjointed mess that even you canât decipher. You stand there, jaw opening and closing like a fish out of water before you finally get it together. âCharles,â you stutter out, his name sounding like a question. You wince and finally tear your gaze away from them. âSorry,â you chuckle, trying to play off your hurt as humor. âCharles needs us all for a mission.â
You donât give them a chance to respond, you slam the door closed, ignoring what you think might be someone calling your name.Â
You shake off the mortifying memory and groan. Your head falls into your hands and you grip at your face until the pain distracts you from the embarrassment. Itâs not too hard to push it all down, to pretend what happened didnât make your heart crumble away into nothing.
Maybe itâs because youâre a mutant that youâre so used to rejection. Youâre used to constantly being disappointed by people around you. Your childhood was nothing but cruelty, your crush not liking you back canât compare to half of what you went through.Â
Thatâs what you tell yourself, at least, to try and pretend it doesnât hurt as much as it does. You shove it down until you think you canât feel that dull ache anymore. And when Jean and Logan walk into the room, looking more put together, you smile at Logan like you always do. It doesnât turn down at the corners, your eyes donât water. You take in a deep breath and look utterly unaffected.Â
He sits down beside you and leans towards you. âI can explain-â
You cut him off and shake your head. âForget about it. I should have knocked.â You turn towards Charles who wheels himself to the front of the room. You dismiss Logan and ignore the way his stare burns into the side of your head.Â
Charles looks to Jean and Logan, a smile starting. Then his gaze drifts towards you and your chest deflates when you see the look on his face. He knows, the old miser probably coasted over your thoughts and he knows. He sends you a sympathetic look that makes you feel like a little girl who just got told unicorns donât exist. âJean, Logan, glad that youâve finally joined us.â
Logan nods and leans back in his chair. But his eyes remain fixed on you and it makes you wish you could stab a fork into them. You let out a short, irritated huff of air and frown at yourself. Maybe you were a little more angry than you would like to admit.Â
You blame Logan for that. You never would have fallen so deep into infatuation if you hadnât believed there was even a sliver of a chance with him. Always speaking so kindly with you when he would barely spare anyone a second glance. Constantly doing checkups on you after a particularly harsh training session with Charles.Â
Your mind runs over all the small things with him, everything youâve done together. And youâre hit with a sudden nauseating thought. Oh my god, what if he sees me paternally?
You force yourself not to physically react but inside your throwing up and fucking freaking out. You feel a sudden spark of alarm from Charles and quickly do your best to fortify your mind so he doesnât see your major mental freakout.Â
Youâre not that much younger than him. Well, itâs not illegal, your crush on Logan. But what if this entire time, when youâve been falling harder and harder for him, heâs just been platonically taking care of you? Youâve seen him do it plenty of times for the younger kids, as reluctant as he is to admit it.Â
Youâre spiraling further and further into panic. So much so that you have no idea whatâs even being discussed or whatâs going on. You get onto the jet and have to ask Storm what youâre doing. She gives you a confused look but tells you nonetheless. Just some recon on a potential mutant trafficking ring. Nothing out of the ordinary, as depressing as that is. There shouldnât be much violence, which is why your group is particularly small today.
You nod your head, moving like youâre in a daze as you throw yourself onto a seat. Logan sits beside you, an alarmed look on his face. âYou alright, kid?â
The nickname, which is used to make your stomach flutter, makes you want to throw up. How have you missed it for this long? It was laid out so plainly before you. Of course, he doesnât want you. Not when he has perfect Jean. Bile rises in your throat with a vicious ferocity when you glare over at Jean.Â
Thereâs a sudden petty, vindictive rage fueling you. The type you should have abandoned in high school, especially now that youâre grown. Instead, you feel like giving into Loganâs idea of what you are. You feel like reacting to all of this petulantly.Â
You ignore Logan and instead catch Jeanâs eyes. Slowly, and with as much intention as you can force into your gaze, you look from her to Logan and then Scott. Her eyes widen and Logan scoffs beside you. She shakes her head minutely, silently begging you not to say anything. You smile at her and stand up.
You take a step towards Scott and Logan calls out an irritated, âKid.â You ignore him and Jean eyes you warily as you approach. She stands like sheâs ready to fight you and take the jet down just to keep you quiet. You reach Scott and can hear the way Jean takes in a sharp breath.Â
âScott,â he looks up at you with his brows raised. There's a pause before you speak. Dragged on too long for Scott not to realize youâre planning something.Â
Jean takes a step towards you and you grin, âMind checking my cuffs?â Scott gives you an odd look and his confusion only gets worse as Jean slumps onto the seat beside him. Sheâs not even trying to hide her relief. Scott shakes his head and holds his hands out, fingers gently probing around the cuffs on your wrists. The ones that keep your powers in check.Â
Youâre still new to welding them. And theyâre too entwined with your emotions for you to just have free range with them. If you hadnât had the cuffs on this morning, youâre afraid you might have just turned everything around you into nothing but dust.
âThey look fine, Flux.â His tone betrays his thoughts. He doesnât know why youâd come to him for this when itâs Charles who usually deals with it. But this stupid, petty little display wasnât for poor oblivious Scott. It was for the woman sitting next to him. The redhead whose still drilling holes into your skull.Â
Youâve got leverage over her that youâve never had before. Scott wouldnât take her little foray with Logan very well. And all it would take is a flick of your wrist to give him a very clear image of exactly what youâd seen. Then, her picture-perfect relationship would be over in a matter of seconds. Youâre sure Logan would be more than pleased. But he doesnât seem to understand that Jean just wants to have fun with him, sheâd never choose him over Scott.Â
âThanks,â thereâs a bite to your tone that youâre not used to. You usually keep your emotions relatively in control. That way you wonât have to wear these cuffs one day. But you feel volatile today. Youâre channeling your hurt and turning it into misguided anger.Â
You drop your wrists to your sides and stalk toward the front, hovering behind Charleâs and Stormâs chairs so you donât have to look at the others. It doesnât take long for you to feel the floor trembling under heavy booted steps.Â
Loganâs arms rest on the headrest of the chairs, bracketing you in between them so you canât escape. He leans forward until his chest is pushed against yours and you can feel every ridge of his muscled torso pressing into you. You try not to suck in a breath, try not to play into the cliche of instantly forgetting why youâre angry when youâre faced with those muscles of his. It is hard, though, because heâs so handsome and so warm and you just want to melt into him.Â
âWanna explain what the hell that was?â His voice is so low, whispering against the shell of your ear so only you can hear. You feel the vibrations of it against your back, his tone more gravelly than it should be.Â
You glance over your shoulder at him, face placid and blank. âWhat? Just needed some help.â Storm looks over at you both and rolls her eyes.Â
Logan opens his mouth to say something but she cuts him off. âPut a pin in the loverâs spat, weâre landing.â Using just a bit of your power, you push Logan off of you and head towards the back of the jet. Thereâs a slight jolt as you land and then the ramp opens up and youâre practically running into the snowy forest.Â
You donât know where you are, mainly because you werenât paying attention, you just know it's fucking freezing. The leather of your suit isnât doing much to help fight against the chill. Charles stays on the jet and reminds you all that this is only meant to be recon. Youâre partnered up with Logan, and as much as it irritates you, youâre not stupid enough to argue against it.
You have to put aside your personal grievances for this mission. You canât risk the safety of mutants because the guy you like likes another girl. Logan seems pleased about it, stubbornly staying by your side even when you make it clear you want space.Â
You both linger behind the otherâs as Storm leads you through the forest. Jean is being more touchy with Scott than normal. Either to assuage her own guilt or to rub it in Loganâs face, youâre not sure which. You nearly gag as you watch them whisper to one another, you glance over at Logan to see if he notices.Â
Youâre startled when you see him already staring at you. His lips tick up into something mischievous when he catches your eye. That smug smirk on his face as he leans in towards you. âWanna tell me whatâs got you so pissed off?â
You roll your eyes and tamp down the rising tide of anger. âNothing,â you bite out, jaw clenching the longer you stare at the back of Jeanâs head. Youâre surprised you havenât chipped a tooth with how hard youâre grinding your teeth together.Â
He scoffs, not believing you for a second. He doesnât say anything, just gives you an expectant stare. You can taste the words forming on your tongue, an irritating urge to just spill your guts overcoming you. Before you can stop yourself you blurt out, âIâm a little surprised thatâs all.â
âOh yeah, âbout what?â You hate how amused he sounds, the chuckle just lying in wait under his words. Like your anger is funny to him, like he didnât just break your stupid fucking heart.Â
You stop walking, not feeling as intimidating as you want while you shiver and huddle into yourself. He seems perfectly at ease in his leather jacket and beater, still refusing to wear the uniform. He leans back and looks at you with a fondness that you canât tell if you love or hate. âYou and little Miss Perfect.â You spit the nickname with enough venom to make both of your eyes widen.Â
Logan rolls his eyes and takes a step towards you, again, Storm interrupts you both. âGuys, really?â Everyone turns around to stare and you will the heat in your face away. âNot the time,â she scolds and you brush past Logan to catch up with the others.Â
You come upon a warehouse, itâs nearly camouflaged under all the snow. You see two guards waiting outside the metal doors and you all disperse behind the trees. Storm glances towards Jean who focuses on the guards. They drop to the floor and you wave your hands, their guns melting into puddles of metal.Â
Logan and Scott move forward, sliding the large metal doors open. You wince at the loud screeching as the rust flakes off the sides. Thereâs a collective quiet as you all hold your breath, waiting for them to give the all-clear. Once they run inside and run back out, you and the others quickly get to your feet and rush into the warehouse. Logan closes the doors again as you make it inside.Â
âNo one here?â Storm checks. Scott shakes his head and you frown. That doesnât make any sense. Why would there be guards if there was nothing inside?
Your question is, unfortunately, answered a minute later. You find a pile of metal crates stacked on top of each other. A large beige tarp covers them. You tug at the corner, letting the fabric slide off. Your eyes flutter with disappointment, âGuys! Over here,â mutants sit inside the crates. Each of them stares at you with varying degrees of mistrust and fear.Â
As awful as it is, youâve gotten used to these quiet depressing missions. There arenât usually many mutants in one place. They donât like to keep the product in one spot for too long. There are only four kids here. The youngest is eleven and the oldest is seventeen. Thereâs nothing physically telling about their abilities so you assume it must be psychic powers.Â
They donât want to come with you until you all give them a demonstration of your powers. Proving that youâre not just trapping them and taking them somewhere worse. Youâre nearly out the door when Charles's voice rings loudly through all of your minds.Â
You wince at the volume, hands coming up to grip at your hair as he shouts, âBehind you!â A gunshot rings out, something hot rips across your wrist and you gasp in pain. Thereâs a clatter of metal as your cuff drops to the ground, the bullet having destroyed it. Without them both, theyâre useless. One wonât work without the other.Â
You glance up at Logan, a panicked look on your face. You can already feel the tidal wave of power thrashing and building in your chest. Itâs been so long with the safety net that you forgot how bad it gets without the cuffs.Â
âWe need to get you out of here!â He shouts over the gunfire. He herds the group behind a cluster of metal shipment boxes. It provides enough cover for you all to try and figure out an escape plan.Â
You listen to the otherâs worried voices, each of them trying to console the kids. You donât know their powers yet. Donât know what might go wrong if they get too scared and canât control their abilities.Â
You canât speak, breaths coming short and fast as you clutch your wrist to your chest. You know itâs delusional, hoping that if you keep a tight grip like the cuff you might be able to control yourself. You can already feel the energy leaking out of you, the ends of everyoneâs hair stands on end. The wall in front of you warps and cracks like it canât decide if itâs liquid or solid.Â
You grit your teeth and look only at Storm. âYou need to get out,â you force the words out. It causes physical pain to try and keep everything at bay. You can feel pressure building in your forehead, pushing out until you think you might explode.Â
âWeâre not leaving you,â Logan snaps. Thereâs shouting going on behind you, a pause as they all reload their guns.Â
âWasnât a question,â you grit out. You look towards Jean and thereâs a moment where you both put aside your differences. You both know how stubborn he is, how much heâll fight against leaving you behind. Regenerative powers or not, it's dangerous to even be close to your gift now. You can see them all straining against the ebbing flow of your powers. Their skin shifts unnaturally like youâre already altering the atoms of their being.Â
This is why youâre only allowed to train with Charles and Jean. They can get in your head, shut it down when you canât. Youâre not sure youâre going to survive yourself. Logan glances between the two of you and practically growls at Jean, âDonât you fuckinâ dare-â
His words trail off into an unintelligible slur as he slumps forward, Jean having knocked him out with her powers. Scott grabs him and grunts under the weight of his body. âIâll cover you,â you gasp the words out. Anything but focusing on your powers causes physical strain that makes you feel like youâre being tugged in a hundred different directions. âJust get them out,â you nod towards the kids.Â
Storm nods and you slip out of cover. It isnât hard to push your powers in one direction, to solidify the air in front of you so the bullets ricochet harmlessly off. You listen to the whine of the metal door and wait for the others to be gone.Â
âTheyâre in the jet,â Charles's voice rings out. âDonât do this,â he warns. You canât think of a response, youâre not even sure what you would say. You never thought you would be able to approach death this calmly, or that this would be how you die. It feels almost pathetic, dying because you lost control on a recon mission.Â
At least those kids are safe. Itâs not a bad reason to die. Just not great. You glance down at the other cuff on your right hand, the air around it fluctuates until it melts off your wrist like liquid metal. With the last barely there tether off your powers, you close your eyes and release the tidal wave.Â
It feels like a dam exploding. It doesnât leak fluidly from you, it rips through you like a hailstorm of knives. Tears apart anything in its path and rewrites the molecular build of everything in its path. Screams echo through the air as menâs bones turn into brittle dust and their hearts morph into something inorganic. Youâre blind to everything around you, vision clouded by the horrific release of energy.Â
You can feel warmth leaking down your face. Blood still pours from the wound on your wrist, and fresh blood from other wounds you canât even feel. You donât know when the screams stop, or when youâre finally drained. But you feel like an empty husk as you drop to the floor, your head bouncing harshly against the cement as everything goes black.Â
âIâm gonna kill you,â Logan says with a grin, glaring at Scott even though itâs Charles who is holding him back. Heâs got a firm mental grasp on Logan, keeping him locked into place while he focuses on the warehouse.Â
Theyâre waiting for the all-clear. The others know thereâs always the possibility that theyâre going to be collecting a body. But none of them are willing to say that, not with the look on Loganâs face. His muscles look ready to pop out of his skin with how much heâs fighting against Charlesâs hold.Â
Scott backs away from Logan with a scoff. He stands near Jean, but she canât take her eyes off the restrained man. Nothing had happened this morning, Flux had seen to that. Interrupting them just as theyâd started. Seeing the way heâs acting now, sheâs starting to believe that nothing is ever going to happen.Â
Heâd looked like he was about to dismiss her when she started making a move. She can see the anger on his face, it seems heâs only ever pissed off. But underneath that, as much as he hides it, she can see the fear. Heâs terrified that they're going to walk in there and youâre going to be dead.Â
Jean can feel the fear of the others as well. Theyâve only seen you lose control once and that had almost leveled the mansion. Charles had stopped you then, but the loss of the cuff had been so sudden Jean just barely had enough strength to keep the others blocked from your powers. She didnât have enough time to shut you down.Â
Jean, as much as sheâs tried to deny it and dismiss her suspicions, canât look Logan in the eye and ignore it anymore. Itâs never been her that heâs wanted. The way he trails along beside you, always prodding and poking until youâre pissy and mouthing off. Itâs not done because he finds antagonizing people fun, it's because he loves seeing you all worked up and passionate. He doesnât view you through the same platonic lens he does the others. Youâre something else to him, something she doesnât want to name, afraid of the bitter taste it will leave on her tongue.Â
Charles slumps back in his chair and Logan suddenly lunges forward. He looks a little surprised by the sudden freedom of movement, but before any of them can stop him heâs running out of the jet. âLogan,â Jean tries to call after him but heâs already a distant blur.Â
Scott sighs and starts down the ramp. âCome on,â he mutters. Heâs the last one who should be coming along. If anything is wrong with you, heâll end up being Loganâs punching bag. Jean follows reluctantly, sheâs not sure she wants to see whatâs happened.Â
Your powers are too similar in their volatile nature. The way they rule you and come so close to destroying you when you use them too much, is too familiar to Jean. She doesnât want to see you lying dead on the floor and be reminded of her own mortality. But someone needs to make sure Logan is stuck on a leash.Â
They reach where the warehouse should be. Itâs nothing but a pile of rubble now. Throughout the wreckage, Jean can make out odd pools of liquid, some writhing, others still. She can only assume that these had been the men shooting at them. She doesnât see your body, none of them do. But Logan isnât giving up.Â
He lifts different pieces of metal and tosses them off into the forest. Jean doesnât sense your presence anywhere but she doesnât have the heart to tell Logan to give up. After a few minutes of searching, she almost tells him to quit. But she canât see him anymore. Heâs disappeared somewhere behind a particularly large pile of roofing. A moment later, Logan stands up. His jacket is gone, wrapped around the body in his arms. None of them are close enough to see if youâre breathing. And he doesnât say a word as he brushes past them, just keeps going back to the jet. Ororo, Scott, and Jean all share a silent look. None of them prepared for the potential fallout thatâs going to happen after this.Â
The first thing you feel is two familiar bands of metal around your wrists. The comforting feeling of the cuffs is enough to have you sinking further into the pillows surrounding you. Then you hear the beeping in your ear, feel the cool blow of AC, and become startlingly aware of the fact that youâre in a bed you donât recognize.Â
You groan, eyes peeling open painfully as your lashes get stuck on your skin. You reach up to rub at your face but your arms feel too weak to lift. You give up on the thought, instead staring up at the ceiling and waiting for your vision to refocus.Â
A throat clears in front of you and you nearly jump out of your skin. Sitting at the end of your bed, arms crossed and a fierce glare on his face is Logan. His feet are propped up on the small table beside you. He quirks a brow and gives you a sardonic grin, âFinally awake, princess?â
Normally the name would have you up and doing somersaults, but thereâs something distinctly negative and disappointed lacing his tone. It squashes any and all butterflies in your stomach. You grimace as you try and sit up. Logan is up in an instant, an annoyed look still on his face as he helps you up.Â
You canât help your dopey smile at how gentle his hands are on you. Even pissed off, he treats you so kindly. Maybe itâs the drugs relaxing you, or the fact that you almost died, but you canât remember whatever made you mad at him. You can only feel the slide of his calloused hands against your arms, the way you shiver under his touch and crave more.Â
He pulls the chair closer to you with a loud scratch of metal feet on the linoleum. You groan at the loud sound and he huffs, throwing himself down in the seat. âHow do you feel?â
Your head sinks back against the wall and you finally realize youâre in the medbay. Itâs why everything smells so sterile. âLike I got hit by a semi.â
He barely lets you finish your thought before he spits out, âWhat the fuck were you thinking?â He doesnât ease you into this at all and you frown. Youâre not sure why you would expect him to ever beat around the bush. Thatâs not his style, heâs always been blunt. Even when others wish he wouldnât be.Â
âWhat else was I supposed to do?â You ask, voice weak. Your throat feels like itâs been ripped apart. Idly, you wonder if you had been screaming in the warehouse or if this was just general strain from the whole ordeal.Â
âNot put yourself at risk like that.â He leans forward, voice stern and bordering on shouting. You know heâs holding back. As much as he wants to lay into you right now, heâs stopping himself from going completely out of his mind. You appreciate it, but you almost wish he would just yell at you. You wish you had a reason to resent him, to finally get over him. âNot have Jean knock me out like that. You donât get to make those decisions for me.â
Itâs completely inappropriate and horrible timing, but you canât help but scoff at the mention of Jeanâs name. Can you not have one conversation thatâs not tainted by the mention of the redhead?
Loganâs mouth snaps shut and he glares at you in disbelief. You squeeze your eyes shut, not willing to face him as embarrassment washes over you. No wonder he always calls you kid. Youâre not exactly acting like an adult. Youâre being a brat and for such a stupid reason too.Â
Just because you like him doesnât mean he has to reciprocate. You canât just force your feelings on someone. âLogan,â you whisper his name, âSorry. Iâm sorry-â
He cuts you off before you can finish. Some of the anger, but not all, has ebbed from his expression. He almost looks like heâs smiling. âJean? Thatâs what this is about? Jealous or something, sweetheart?â
You sputter, shocked little noises leaving you but no words. After a solid minute of restarting a sentence you donât know how to end you finally land on a squeaky, âWho?â If you werenât so mortified, you might have just thrown yourself out the window. Out of every cop-out you could have gone with you chose to just pretend you didnât know who she was. Maybe you could make this work, like selective amnesia.Â
Your shame only builds as Logan laughs. You cover your face and wish you could bury yourself six feet deep and never come up. You feel two rough hands wrap around your wrists, tugging your own away from your face. You donât have the energy to fight back, so you keep your eyes on his chin. Too afraid to meet his gaze.Â
âCome on,â he mutters, gently nudging your chin up until youâre forced to look at him. You're caught off guard by the look in his eyes. You recognize it, but youâd only ever seen it directed at Jean. Itâs the same way youâve always looked at him. Pure unguarded want and desire.Â
The hand on your chin drifts back, fingers tangling in your hair and gently resting on your jaw. He tugs you forward until your lips are nearly touching, breaths mingling with every exhale. âOnly ever wanted you, darlin'.ââ
The kiss catches you off guard. It shouldnât, deep down you knew it was coming, but the intensity behind it, the way you can practically taste how bad he wants this, wants you, catches you off guard. You lean into him, wrapping your arms around his neck and letting yourself melt into his hold.Â
His free hand drifts to your waist and clutches the flimsy hospital gown until you hear it tear. You part your lips, deepening the kiss so you can finally taste him. Itâs cigars and whiskey, something you should hate but is entirely intoxicating when heâs holding you so tightly. Fireworks are going off in your mind, sparks darting between your fingers as the cuffs struggle to contain all the energy suddenly pushing out of you.Â
He can feel you holding back, squeezing you like itâs a promise he can take it. Take everything you throw at him. You let go as much as your cuffs will allow you. Let the energy blanket you both so you canât hear your heart monitor going off like crazy. So you donât feel anything other than each other. You think youâre going to devour each other like youâll just keep kissing until neither of you can take it anymore. You donât want to let go of him, donât want to lose this moment.Â
But you have to breathe. You donât get to just keep living the way he does. You pull away from him slowly, every part of you dreading separating from him. His forehead drops against your own, his laughter playing along your lips as he finally hears the monitor going haywire.Â
You groan, flicking your wrist and shutting it off so it canât betray how flustered you are anymore. He gently nudges you aside so he can sit beside you on the bed. You donât waste a second before youâre draping yourself across his chest and siphoning his warmth. He chuckles, arms coming up to wrap around you.Â
âCanât believe you were jealous of Jean.â
âShut up,â you snipe. You look up at him and glare, âHow else do you explain what you two were doing?â
He leans forward and gives you a smug grin. âShe came onto me, sweetheart.â Your face screws up in distaste and jealousy. Sheâs going to need to learn to keep her hands to herself. He seems to feel the way you tense up, he huffs in amusement and rubs your back. âRelax, youâre gonna blow your fuse again.â
You glance down at your wrists and nuzzle further into him. You canât believe you could have been laying on him this whole time. You never want to use a blanket again, not when youâve got him. âIâll be fine now that Iâve got my cuffs.â
His hand stills on your bicep. He squeezes it before his hand drifts up to your chin and he tilts your face up again. âI donât ever want to see that again.â Youâre a little surprised by the sudden shift in tone, but you knew this was coming.Â
âI had to, Logan. I either took you all down with me or I went on my own.â
Logan frowns and takes in a deep breath. You place a hand on his arm, giving it a gentle squeeze. He smiles down at you, âNext time, take me with you. Iâm not fucking dealing with Summers without you.â
You canât help but chuckle. Your face grows warm and your chest expands with some odd gleeful feeling as he laces your fingers together. âDeal,â you whisper, still smiling at him.Â
A/N: Okay, this might be shit, Iâm not sure. I sort of rushed the ending because as I was writing this I had another idea for him. I guess Iâm officially off my hiatus.Â
end. â I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
Logan because deadpool & wolverine shot me right back into my x-men phase :)))
Sheâs a such a little shit. I love her.
headcannon that while Logan tends to do this only when he doesnât have utensils, Laura does it all the time just because.
also Iâm unseasonably proud of that background
pov you love them but for the life of you canât figure out how to draw them
Idk if it had flaws and I donât care bc thatâs the most fun Iâve had watching a movie in a while
Umm holy shit?? Just saw Deadpool 3 and⊠wow. Hello new hyperfixation
Umm holy shit?? Just saw Deadpool 3 and⊠wow. Hello new hyperfixation
I made this idek when, but this poorly sketched wlw Logurt (inspired by the butch Logan trend that I am extremely late to ofc) has been in my drafts for a while now. I'm just posting this, despite really disliking it tbh, just to have some sort of activity. I'm art blocked and extremely busy with life stuff. Sorry to my sweet mutuals who I do not have the energy to reply too. Chatting is just so exhausting lately. :') ANYWAy, sorry for the ramble. Happy Halloween to those who celebrate. I forgot it was even today. Yaaaaay.
THIS ONE IS FOR THE SELF/OC SHIPPERS OUT THERE. I SEE YOU AND I HAVE YOUR BACK!! đđđ«”đ«”
I did two variations of pronouns for you all :))!! BUT THERE IS MORE!! If you'd like a specific set of pronouns, such as it/its, or even neo-pronouns, I'm super open to creating more variations. I'll just reblog this with the changes and tag the person who asks (if that is okay ofc, so please lmk whether you'd be okay with being tagged). ^^
I changed Kurt's dialogue a bit, since I feel like "babe" is a more common and inclusive term, but it also keeps the playfulness of the original panel that I redrew. :)) Kept the style kind of simple, since I did not feel like I would finish this if I went anymore complex. Anyway, here is the comic panel that I redrew/that inspired me to do this.
(me every year) IT'S GONNA BE THEIR YEAR