greeting a happy new year to all! đđâ¨
may we all be sated with enha goodness this year, and for me to write more đĽşâ¨
MANIFESTING I GET A CHANCE TO SEE THEM ANY DATE THIS YEAR im melting đŠđď¸
he looks even more huggable ...
KAKSKSNSK MAYBE I'M IN LOVE đđđđđđ
pairing : spider-man!jake x gn!reader
summary : a late night studying session with shinyu results in a weird stalker following you home⌠but wait, heâs webbed to the wall..? by⌠SPIDER-MAN? whatâs even weirder is that you find yourself running yourself running into the hero more often and begin to see some similarities with⌠jake sim?
warnings : FLUFF, very very oblivious reader, jake is SUCH a loser here (i crave a loser bf guys⌠heâs just a nerd), jake is popular, shinyu as a friend of the reader
a/n : omg everyone thank @writhyv for getting me back to writing for jake ! ALSO for getting me to write a hot loser jake (i love it very much) GIFT FOR HIM !! thank u pook ilysm.
queueing⌠: serendipity - laufey, sweet - cigarettes after sex, safety zone - leehi, blue - kai (not yung kai)
jake sim is the kind of guy who could ruin your entire life without even trying.
heâs the hottest person youâve ever seen in real life. like, actually hot. perfect hair, perfect smile, broad shoulders under whatever hoodie he always throws on like he didn't just accidentally win the genetic lottery. heâs popular in the way that feels effortless, always surrounded by people who seem to orbit around him like heâs some kind of sun.
the whole school loves him. teachers, athletes, the kids who sit in the back of class and never talk. jake sim could probably trip and faceplant in the middle of the hallway and people would still clap for him.
the only weird part is that heâs also⌠kind of a loser.
you donât really know him, just know of him. heâs in a few of your classes, close enough to be a familiar face but not close enough for either of you to actually talk. if anything, heâs just background noise in your life, one of those people who exists on the edge of your universe without ever really crossing into it.
except sometimes, every now and then, you feel like heâs acting a little⌠strange around you.
not that you think too hard about it. probably nothing.
the first time it happens, you donât even clock it as anything weird.
itâs in english class, some group discussion where nobodyâs actually talking, just pretending to think really hard about the book none of you actually read. youâre flipping through the pages when you feel someone staring.
you glance up, and there he is. jake sim.
heâs sitting diagonally across from you, elbow propped on the desk, eyes locked on you like heâs trying to figure out the meaning of life or something.
you blink at him.
he blinks back.
and then, like he just got caught committing a crime, he whips his head down, pretending to scribble something in his notebook with the intensity of someone writing their final will and testament.
...okay. weird, but whatever.
the second time, itâs in the hallway between classes.
you're digging through your locker, minding your own business, when you hear someone clear their throat behind you.
âuhâhi.â
you turn around.
jake sim is standing there, clutching his textbook like it's a lifeline. up close, he's even hotter, sleeves pushed up to his elbows, hair falling into his eyes.
he's also⌠kind of red in the face?
âhey?â you offer, confused.
he opens his mouth like heâs about to say something, then immediately shuts it again.
ânever mind,â he mutters, spinning on his heel and walking away so fast you'd think the hallway was on fire.
...what the hell was that?
it keeps happening.
little moments that should probably add up to something if you actually paid attention, but you donât, because jake sim is jake sim, and youâre just you.
he stumbles over his words when you ask to borrow a pencil. drops his entire water bottle when you accidentally brush past him in class. one time, you catch him fully tripping over absolutely nothing when you make eye contact with him across the cafeteria.
but for some reason, your brain just files it all away under wow, popular guys are weird sometimes and moves on.
if anyone ever asked you what you think of jake sim, youâd probably just shrug and say heâs nice.
you don't know that heâs been in love with you since sophomore year.
you don't know that every time he tries to talk to you, his brain completely shuts down.
and you definitely donât know that the same guy who turns into a stammering mess around you spends his nights swinging across the city, cracking jokes and saving people as if confidence is something that comes built into the suit.
the third time you actually talk to him is in chemistry class.
the teacher pairs you up for some experiment, something involving measurements and burning stuff, and jake ends up at your table, tapping his pen against the notebook like heâs trying to act casual.
"can you pass me the beaker?" you ask.
he freezes.
his eyes flick to the beaker, then to you, then back to the beaker like it's a bomb heâs been assigned to defuse.
"...yeah," he says, voice cracking on the single syllable.
you donât think anything of it, just reach for the beaker when he hands it over. your fingers brush against his, and he drops it.
it clatters against the table, rolling onto the floor with a loud clink.
"oh."
jake looks like he wants to melt through the floor.
"it's fine," you say, bending down to grab it. âat least it didnât breakâ you joke to lighten to mood.
he doesn't move, just sits there gripping the edge of the table like itâs the only thing keeping him tethered to the earth.
you offer him a small smile when you straighten up, placing the beaker back on the table.
"chill," you joke. "it's not that serious."
jake visibly short-circuits.
"chill," he echoes, like it's the first time he's ever heard the word in his life.
if someone told you jake sim had a crush on you, youâd probably laugh.
guys like him donât go for people like you.
guys like him date cheerleaders or instagram models or the kind of girls who know exactly how to flip their hair and laugh in that effortless, pretty way.
not people who half-ass their homework and accidentally fall asleep during history lectures.
definitely not people who would rather have deep conversations on rooftops than go to parties.
but what you donât know is that those are all the exact reasons jake likes you.
he likes the way you always stick your tongue out a little when youâre concentrating. he likes how you always hum to yourself when you think nobodyâs listening. he likes how you talk to everyone the same, never acting like anybodyâs above or below you.
he likes you.
and itâs ruining his life.
â
"do you think jake sim is... weird?"
shinyu raises an eyebrow. "weird how?"
you frown, trying to find the right words.
"i donât know. like... awkward? around me?"
he snorts. "he's awkward around everyone."
"not really."
shinyu pauses, eyes narrowing like heâs finally catching onto something you've been missing this whole time.
"...wait." he leans in. "do you seriously not realize he's into you?"
you blink.
"what?"
"oh my god." he gape at you like you're the dumbest person alive. "he's had a crush on you since, like, forever."
you genuinely laugh at that, because there's no way.
right?
meanwhile, across the cafeteria, jake sim is currently choking on his water because he saw you glance in his direction for half a second.
sunghoon pats his back, looking vaguely concerned.
"bro, you have superpowers, but you can't even talk to your crush?"
jake coughs harder. heâs so, so doomed.
â
you donât try to stay out late. it just happens.
sometimes itâs because you lose track of time, caught up in the cityâs glow. sometimes itâs because youâre walking home after a long study session, brain fried from trying to shove too much information into it at once.
tonight, itâs the latter.
shinyu yawns next to you, stretching his arms over his head as you both step out of the library. âi swear, if i have to look at one more page of notes, iâm throwing my entire textbook into the river.â
âyou say that every time,â you point out.
âand one of these days, iâll actually do it.â
you snort, tugging your hoodie closer around you. itâs late enough that the streets are quieter than usual, the hum of distant traffic the only real sound. most of the shops have already shut down, save for the 24-hour convenience store at the corner.
shinyu pulls out his phone. âshould i call a cab?â
ânah,â you shake your head. âiâll just walk.â
he frowns. âare you sure? itâs kinda late.â
âi always do this. iâll be fine.â
he hesitates, clearly debating whether or not to argue, but eventually sighs. âalright. text me when you get home, though.â
âyes, mom.â
he rolls his eyes, flicking your forehead before heading off in the opposite direction.
you stuff your hands into your pockets and start walking.
your route home is familiar, same streets, same flickering streetlights, same little shop windows reflecting the glow of the city back at you. you donât feel unsafe. if anything, you like walking at night. thereâs something peaceful about it, something that makes the world feel a little softer around the edges.
but thenâ
you hear footsteps behind you.
at first, you donât think much of it. there are always other people out and about. but as you keep walking, the sound stays steady, just far enough behind that you canât tell if itâs a coincidence or something else.
your stomach twists. âwho the fuck is walking around the same route as you at 2am..?â you think to yourself.
you glance over your shoulder.
a man. mid-thirties, maybe. hood pulled up over his head.
the moment your eyes meet, he quickly looks away, pretending to check his phone.
your heart beats a little faster. youâre probably overreacting.
but then you turn the corner, and the footsteps turn with you.
you pick up your pace.
so do they.
your chest tightens. okay. okay. youâre not imagining it.
you scan the street for other people, but itâs mostly empty. the nearest open shop is too far ahead, and the alley you just passed isâ
wait.
your stomach drops.
you didnât even hear him move, but suddenly, heâs not behind you anymore.
heâs right there.
you barely have time to react before he grabs your wrist, grip too tight, breath too close. âheyââ
before you can even think to scream, something flies past youâfast, sharp.
and suddenly, the man is yanked backwards.
one second heâs gripping you, the next heâs pinned to the alley wall, struggling against thick strands of white webbing wrapped tight around his torso.
your breath catches in your throat.
what.
your brain barely has time to process it beforeâ
âhey,â a voice calls.
you turn, heart still pounding.
and standing there, perched casually on the edge of a lamppost, is spider-man.
your mouth goes dry.
he hops down, landing lightly on the pavement, head tilting slightly as he glances at the guy still stuck to the wall. âyeah, i donât think so,â he says.
the guy grunts, struggling uselessly against the webbing.
spider-man sighs. ânot your best move.â
you just stare.
you know who he is, obviously. everyone does. but knowing about spider-man and actually seeing him in front of you are two entirely different things.
he turns to you. âyou alright?â
you blink at him, mind still catching up. âuh.â
he tilts his head. âiâll take that as a yes?â
ây-yeah,â you stammer, clearing your throat. âyeah. iâm fine.â
âgood.â he gestures vaguely toward the guy. âiâll leave him here for the cops. but, uhâmaybe donât walk alone this late?â
you exhale sharply. âyeah. got it. solid advice.â
spider-man lets out a soft chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck.
for some reason, that tiny, almost shy gesture is what actually makes your brain start working again.
because up until now, he seemed untouchable, fast, sharp, the kind of person who moves like he already knows the next ten steps ahead. but now, standing here, heâs shifting his weight slightly like heâs not sure what to do with his hands.
and for some reason, that makes him feel real.
âdo you, uh,â he starts, then hesitates. âwant me to walk you home?â
your stomach flips.
âoh,â you say. âyou donât have toââ
âi donât mind,â he says quickly. âjust to make sure you get there safe.â
you bite your lip. you really should say no. heâs probably busy, and you donât want to take up more of his time.
but also.
spider-man just offered to walk you home.
what kind of idiot would turn that down?
ââŚokay,â you say finally.
you can hear the smile in his voice. âokay.â
â
when you finally get home, he hangs back by the streetlight, watching as you unlock the door.
âthanks again,â you say, turning back to him.
he nods. âanytime.â
you hesitate.
ââŚdo you do handshakes?â
he lets out a soft laugh. ânot usually.â
âoh.â you lower your hand, a little embarrassed.
but before you can pull it back completely, he reaches out and bumps his knuckles against yours.
itâs such a small thing. so stupidly small.
but for some reason, it makes your heart stutter.
you glance up at him, but heâs already moving, gripping the edge of the nearest rooftop, hoisting himself up with an easy strength that makes your stomach flip.
and then, just before he disappearsâ
âgoodnight,â he says.
your breath catches.
and then heâs gone.
you collapse onto your bed the second you get inside, phone buzzing with a text from shinyu.
shinyu: you home yet? you: yeah shinyu: good
you hover over the keyboard for a second, debating.
and thenâ
you: hey. what do you think of spider-man?
his reply is instant.
shinyu: idk. kinda cool? you: ...yeah.
you stare at the screen. your heart is still racing.
and for some reason, all you can hear is his voice.
stupid voice with that stupid accent you recognize but look over.
â
itâs become a thing now.
you didnât plan for it, but somehow it has.
spider-man keeps showing up.
at first, itâs just the occasional late-night save, that charming but awkward conversation at the end where you thank him profusely and he gives you a weird little knuckle bump before disappearing into the night.
but then...
you start seeing him more.
you start to notice that he seems to be where you are, just when you need him.
it happens AGAIN one night when youâre walking home after another late study session with shinyu.
youâre tired. drained. your brain feels like mush, and shinyu, though heâs usually the one full of energy, seems to be on the same wavelength.
"i swear," he mutters, "if i see one more page of equations, iâm going to just⌠yeet this textbook into the nearest river."
you snort, nudging him. "donât tempt me. iâm kind of considering it myself."
you both chuckle, but it's tired. the kind of tired where you canât even muster the energy to fake your usual enthusiasm.
the streets are quiet again, just the sound of your footsteps echoing in the night.
and, as usual, that familiar feeling creeps in, like youâre being watched.
you brush it off. itâs probably just a shadow, the way the streetlights flicker and make things seem closer than they are.
but then, in the distance, a small rustle.
you freeze for a second, but quickly continue walking, convincing yourself itâs nothing.
you turn another corner, and then, there he is.
spider-man.
you blink, more than a little surprised.
âoh, hey,â you say, trying to act casual. "what's up?"
heâs leaning against the side of a building, arms crossed, but when you notice the way heâs watching you, you canât shake the feeling that maybe heâs been here for a while.
he straightens, suddenly looking a bit... embarrassed? "uh, nothing much. just making sure you're alright."
you blink, a little confused. "iâm fine? why wouldnât i be?"
he gives a small shrug, like itâs no big deal. "you know, just being careful. youâre walking kinda late, and iâm... well, iâm always around."
you raise an eyebrow. "you just 'happen' to be around whenever i'm out late?"
he looks sheepish. "yep."
you stare at him for a second.
âare you stalking me?â you joke, but it comes out a little too serious.
his eyes widen, and he starts shaking his head quickly, scratching at the back of his neck. "no! no, of course not. just... making sure you're safe, yâknow?"
you chuckle softly, rolling your eyes. "right. sure."
he seems to relax when you donât push it further. âanyway, i could walk you home if you want. just in case, you know?â
you shrug. itâs not like you mind. "okay, but only because youâre weirdly persistent."
he grins, clearly relieved. "wouldnât dream of letting you walk alone."
itâs an awkward, quiet walk. mostly because spider-man doesnât seem to know how to start a normal conversation. his silence is comfortable, though, like thereâs no need to fill the space. just walking with him feels nice.
by the time youâre at your front door, youâre laughing over something dumb that shinyu had said earlier. you feel strangely at ease.
"thanks for walking me home," you say.
he shrugs. âitâs nothing. just doing my part.â
you smile, heart skipping a beat. "goodnight, spider-man."
"goodnight," he replies, his voice soft. then, as usual, heâs gone before you can say anything else.
â
the routine builds quickly after that.
it becomes normal to see him around whenever youâre out at night.
he always seems to be around, sometimes just dropping in for a casual chat, other times swooping in to rescue you from the occasional shady character or two.
but itâs the quiet moments you start to cherish.
thereâs one night where you and shinyu are hanging out on the rooftop of your building, talking about life as you always do. the sky is clear, the stars twinkling, and it feels like a moment frozen in time.
shinyu is sprawled across the floor, pretending to sleep, while youâre sitting with your legs dangling over the edge, arms resting on your knees.
âso,â he says suddenly, breaking the silence. âwhatâs the deal with spider-man, anyway? you two talk a lot now.â
you freeze for a second, eyes narrowing. âwhat do you mean âtalk a lot?ââ
he raises his hands in mock surrender. âiâm just saying. you two have some weird dynamic. are you, like, dating or something?â
you laugh it off. âwhat? no! itâs just... heâs, uh, nice. i donât know, heâs just been around when iâve needed him, thatâs all.â
shinyu sits up, raising an eyebrow. âoh, really? just âhappensâ to be there. thatâs cute.â
you roll your eyes. âheâs cool, okay?â
he gives you a knowing look. âif you say so.â
before you can respond, you hear the familiar sound of whoosh above you.
spider-man drops down onto the roof, landing lightly beside you with an easy smile.
âhey, guys,â he says casually, like he hasnât just flown in to join the conversation.
you smile at him, your heart fluttering a little. âhey, spider-man.â
shinyu squints at him, grinning. âso, weâre just hanging out, huh? thatâs cool. do you want anything to drink?â
spider-man looks at him in confusion. âhuh?â
âi mean, youâre here now. should we get drinks?â shinyu gestures to the corner store below. âiâll go down and grab something. you want anything?â
spider-man glances at you first, and then back at shinyu, his expression unreadable for a moment.
âuh, sure,â he says, his voice a little uncertain. âiâll just have whatever youâre getting.â
shinyu gives a little nod before standing up and heading down the stairs to the convenience store.
you and spider-man are left alone again.
the air feels different this time, like the space between you has changed. you both sit there in silence for a moment.
he clears his throat. âso, uh... howâs the studying going?â
you laugh softly. âhonestly? i want to burn my textbooks.â
he chuckles. âyeah, i get that. same.â
you glance at him, curious. âyou study too?â
he shrugs, looking awkward. âwell... when iâm not being, you know, spider-man. i try to keep up.â
you nod, smiling. âcool. you seem smart.â
he looks away, rubbing the back of his neck. âyeah, well, itâs all kind of a... blur, yâknow?â
you laugh again. "yeah, i know exactly what you mean."
and suddenly, you realize something.
youâre actually... comfortable with him.
not just the whole superhero thing, not just the awkwardness, but the person behind it. you donât need to be on edge around him.
and somehow, that makes you feel both lighter and a little strange.
later, shinyu returns with drinks, and the conversation picks up again. spider-man relaxes a little more, though he still seems a bit fidgety.
you canât help but notice how, even now, when heâs around shinyu, he still doesnât seem to know how to act. thereâs an ease to his awkwardness thatâs almost endearing.
shinyu teases him a little, asking if heâs ever had to take his suit off after a long night of âsaving peopleâ and spider-man just shrugs awkwardly, mumbling something about the suit being âperfectly breathableâ as if thatâs the most casual thing in the world.
itâs a weird dynamic, but it works.
and for the first time in a long time, you donât feel quite so... lonely.
â
when itâs time to leave, spider-man walks you home again, which is literally downstairs.
youâre still laughing from something shinyu said, but when you glance over at spider-man, you notice him looking at you more seriously than usual.
âyou okay?â you ask, surprised by the shift in his mood.
âyeah,â he replies, his voice quiet. âjust... itâs nothing. just wanted to check on you.â
you smile softly. âyou do that a lot.â
he shrugs. âitâs my job, right?â
and even though he says that, you can see the hint of something more. something deeper.
youâre not sure what it is, but you feel it.
you smile to yourself, wondering if maybe youâre starting to understand him a little better.
when you get to your front door, you wave goodbye, but this time, he doesnât leave immediately.
he lingers.
âgoodnight, spider-man,â you say quietly.
âgoodnight.â
heâs gone before you can blink.
and you canât help but feel like thereâs something heâs not saying. something important.
â
youâre at school, sitting with shinyu during lunch, lazily picking at your food as the two of you chat about the usual, homework, annoying teachers, and how much youâd rather be anywhere else.
and then, somehow, the conversation lands on him.
"so, spider-man," shinyu says, taking a sip of his drink. "you never really told me. whatâs the deal with that?"
you blink, caught off guard. "what do you mean?"
shinyu shrugs. "i mean, you guys talk a lot. whatâs he like?"
you pause, considering it. "well... heâs nice. kind of awkward, but in a cute way. and, i donât know, i feel like i can actually talk to him, you know?"
shinyu raises an eyebrow, clearly amused. "so you like talking to him."
"obviously," you say, rolling your eyes. "heâs funny, easy to be around, andâ"
you pause for half a second.
shinyu waits.
"... and?"
you shrug, acting like what youâre about to say is no big deal. "and heâs kinda hot."
it happens instantly.
a loud choking sound from the table next to you.
you both turn your heads.
jake sim, golden boy of the school, is currently dying.
heâs hunched over, violently coughing, his drink abandoned as he tries to catch his breath. his friends, some of the other popular kids, are just watching him, either concerned or mildly entertained.
"bro, what is wrong with you?" one of them asks, patting jake on the back.
jake wheezes.
you stare at him, blinking. "... you good?"
he looks up at you, eyes wide, mouth slightly open like he just realized he made a scene.
"uhâyeah! yes! iâm fine!" he blurts out, too loudly.
you and shinyu exchange a look.
"uh-huh," you say, unconvinced.
jake quickly grabs his drink again, pretending like nothing happened, but you can see it, how his ears are red, how heâs suddenly so focused on stirring his drink with his straw like itâs the most interesting thing in the world.
weird.
shinyu, being shinyu, decides to push it.
"wait, you were listening to us?" he says, grinning.
"no!" jake says, way too fast. "i wasnât listening! i justâ i meanâ i heard something, but it wasnât on purposeâ"
he stops himself, as if realizing heâs making it worse.
you stare at him, trying to figure out what his deal is.
jake sim is, objectively, very attractive. everyone at school knows it. heâs the kind of guy who could probably get away with murder just by looking at someone the right way.
but right now?
right now, he looks like a glitching NPC.
shinyu smirks. "so, which part made you choke? the part where spider-man is easy to talk to, or the part where heâs hot?"
jake makes a strangled sound, like he just swallowed his soul.
"iâ" he starts, then stops, looking deeply uncomfortable.
you narrow your eyes at him.
"wait," you say suddenly, realization hitting. "do you know spider-man?"
jake freezes.
his eyes dart around the table, as if searching for an escape route.
"iâuhâno?" he tries, but it sounds more like a question than an answer.
"that was very convincing," you deadpan.
"thank you," he says automatically. then, realizing what he just did, he groans and drags a hand down his face.
you just stare at him.
what is up with this guy?
shinyu snickers. "dude, youâre acting real suspicious right now."
"i am not," jake says, still looking very much suspicious.
you and shinyu both just keep staring at him.
jake, unable to handle the attention, suddenly stands up. "gotta go!" he announces, grabbing his tray and practically sprinting away from the table.
... what.
you blink. "okay, what was that?"
shinyu just laughs. "no clue, but that was hilarious."
you shake your head, still baffled.
jake sim is weird.
â
that night, like clockwork, spider-man appears.
youâre outside, walking back from the convenience store, a bag of snacks in your hand when you hear the familiar thwip of a web.
you donât even flinch anymore.
âoh, hey,â you say as he lands beside you. "youâre early tonight."
spider-man, who seems slightly fidgety for some reason, clears his throat. "uh, yeah. just happened to be around."
you nod. "right. as always."
thereâs a beat of silence as the two of you start walking.
then, spider-man casually goes, "sooo... you think iâm hot?"
you freeze mid-step.
"whatâ"
he panics immediately. "i meanâ! not that i heard you say that or anything, but likeâ well, letâs say hypothetically you did say that, and hypothetically i overheardâ"
you narrow your eyes. "did you overhear?"
he hesitates for a full second before blurting, "no!"
"uh-huh."
he coughs. "but if you did think thatâ i mean, just out of curiosity, uh... what part exactly were you talking about?"
you stare at him.
he shifts, looking way too eager but also like he might die on the spot.
you decide to mess with him.
"i dunno," you say, pretending to think. "maybe the mask? keeps things mysterious."
"mysterious," he echoes.
"or maybe the whole... âhero of the cityâ thing," you continue. "kind of hard not to find that attractive."
"oh," he says weakly.
you glance at him.
his shoulders are tense. heâs definitely blushing. even through the mask, you can tell.
you bite back a grin. "why do you ask, spider-man? you interested in what i think?"
"whâno! i meanâ i guess? maybe? i justâ" he stops mid-sentence, suddenly frustrated with himself.
you laugh. "wow. you get flustered really easily."
"i do not," he lies.
you grin.
heâs so bad at this.
but... itâs kind of cute.
he clears his throat, clearly desperate to change the subject. "so! um! anyway! totally unrelated questionâ"
"uh-huh?"
"âbut, like... have you ever thought that maybe you already know me?"
you blink. "what?"
he shrugs, trying to sound casual. "i mean, like, what if i wasnât just spider-man? what if i was, i dunno... someone you see every day?"
you frown, confused.
"... but youâre not," you say simply. "iâd recognize your voice."
spider-man pauses.
"oh," he says.
like he just remembered thatâs a thing.
you keep walking, completely missing the way his entire body slumps.
"why?" you ask, glancing at him. "are you secretly my math teacher or something?"
he lets out a weird, awkward laugh. "pfft. no! definitely not. thatâd be, um. weird."
you snort. "right... mr. lee..?"
spider-man sighs, clearly realizing this isnât going anywhere. "never mind," he mutters.
you just shrug. "okay. anyway, are we getting snacks or what?"
he perks up instantly. "yes! letâs do that."
heâs back to normal.
but inside, jake sim is screaming.
when you get home, you fall onto your bed, thinking about the conversation you just had.
weird.
he was acting weird.
but itâs probably nothing.
meanwhile, somewhere across the city, jake is lying face down on his bed, aggressively kicking his feet like a teenage girl in a romcom, absolutely mortified.
his friends are still roasting him for what happened at lunch.
heâs never going to live this down.
â
rooftops are underrated.
shinyu agrees.
âthis is the best place to complain about life,â he says, stretching out on the rooftop ledge. âno teachers, no school stress, just the city and the stars.â
âand potential death if you slip,â you point out.
âadds to the thrill.â
you laugh, taking a deep breath as the cool night air brushes against your skin. itâs peaceful up here, the hum of the city below feeling distant, almost like background noise.
this is your favorite part of the night, escaping the weight of the day, letting yourself exist without expectations.
shinyu, lounging beside you, throws a crumpled snack wrapper at you. âso. be honest. do you think mr. lee is actually grading our essays or just randomly handing out scores?â
ârandom,â you say immediately. âthereâs no way he read mine. i wrote a whole paragraph about how pigeons should have jobs and still got an A.â
shinyu nearly chokes on his drink. âwhat?â
âi was sleep-deprived, okay?â
âbro.â
you grin, nudging his shoulder. shinyuâs dramatic laughter echoes in the open air, and for a second, it feels like nothing else matters.
but thenâ
thwip.
a familiar sound.
you donât even flinch.
shinyu, however, does. âbro,â he says, staring at the figure that just landed on the rooftop. âyour weird little superhero friend is here again.â
spider-man straightens up. âhey,â he says, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his hoodie over his suit.
âoh, great,â shinyu mutters. ânow i have to third-wheel whatever this weird thing is.â
you roll your eyes. âitâs not weird.â
spider-man, beside you, shifts. âwait. whatâs not weird?â
shinyu smirks. âyou and them.â
spider-man nearly trips over his own feet. âwhat?â
you laugh. âignore him, heâs just being annoying.â
âiâm just saying,â shinyu teases, standing up and stretching, âi feel like a chaperone. anyway, iâm heading home before mr. lee assigns another test. try not to die.â
you wave him off, watching as he climbs down the fire escape.
the second heâs gone, spider-man sighs dramatically. âyour friend is kind of scary.â
âheâd love to hear that.â
he chuckles, shaking his head. âso. you just hang out on rooftops for fun?â
âwhy not?â you shrug. âitâs peaceful. no school, no responsibilities, noââ
you shift slightly on the ledgeâ
and your foot slips.
for a split second, your stomach drops.
but before you can even process itâ
strong hands grab your waist, pulling you back to safety.
your breath catches.
you donât even have time to think before youâre pressed against him, his hands still firmly holding you, your faces way too close.
your brain short-circuits.
spider-man tenses.
his mask hides his expression, but you can feel the shift, the sudden awareness of just how close you are.
your hands are gripping his arms, his hands are still on your waist, and for a moment, neither of you move.
the air is thick.
his breathing is a little uneven.
heâs calm on the outside, but inside?
jake sim is losing his mind.
because oh my god.
he is touching you.
holding you.
youâre close enough that he can see every little detail, the way your lips part slightly in surprise, the way your eyes flicker down for a second before meeting his again.
heâs panicking.
but he cannot show it.
so he clears his throat, trying to sound casual. âyou, uh. good?â
you blink, snapping out of it.
âoh. yeah. thanks forââ you gesture vaguely, still hyper-aware of his hands.
spider-man nods, though his brain is still buffering.
he should move.
but his hands donât move.
why arenât they moving?
heâs gripping your waist like youâre going to fall again, like he has to keep holding on, and it takes everything in him to not scream.
you tilt your head.
â... you okay?â
"me? oh! yeah! totally fine! absolutely not freaking out or anything!â
you squint at him.
"... you sure?"
"yep! totally! one hundred percent normal behavior happening right now!"
he still hasnât let go.
you raise an eyebrow.
he realizes he still hasnât let go.
"oh! right! my bad!"
he snatches his hands away like he just touched fire, stumbling back a step.
you blink at him.
he looks like he just had an out-of-body experience.
"... youâre acting weird," you say.
"no, iâm not!" he says, voice cracking.
you stare at him for another second before shrugging. "okay."
you sit back down like nothing happened.
spider-man stands there, physically trying to reboot.
â
the next day at school, jake sim is a mess.
he is so weird about it.
you donât even notice at first, too busy going about your day, but then, little things start adding up.
like how he keeps running into walls.
or how he drops his books every time you walk by.
or how, when you pass him in the hallway, he does a 180-degree spin and walks the other direction like he just forgot where he was going.
itâs like he has no motor skills around you.
and the worst part?
everyone notices.
"bro, what is your deal?" one of his friends asks after jake nearly trips over thin air.
jake just groans, aggressively rubbing his face. "i donât wanna talk about it."
his friends exchange a look.
"youâve been acting weird since yesterday," one of them says. "what happened?"
"nothing!"
"are you sure?"
"yes!" jake says, too fast. "iâm totally fine! absolutely normal! definitely not thinking about anything that happened on a rooftop last night!"
his friends blink.
"... what?"
jake.exe has stopped working.
"i gotta go," he says, shoving his books into his bag and sprinting away before they can ask any more questions.
meanwhile, you, completely oblivious to his entire breakdown, sit down with shinyu at lunch, happily eating your food.
"hey," shinyu says, nudging you. "you notice how jakeâs been acting extra weird today?"
you pause mid-bite. "huh?"
"he keeps running into things. i think you broke him."
"... what did i do?"
shinyu shrugs. "no clue. but itâs hilarious."
you glance across the cafeteria.
jake is at his table, looking stressed.
you donât think much of it.
meanwhile, jake is sitting there, gripping his drink, replaying last nightâs moment in his head like a broken record, absolutely suffering.
thereâs something weird about jake sim.
not in an obvious way, heâs still the schoolâs golden boy, still effortlessly good-looking, still surrounded by people who seem drawn to him like he has his own gravitational pull.
but ever since you started talking to spider-man, something feels... off.
and the more you think about it, the more you realize...
jake and spider-man are kind of similar.
not in every way, obviously.
spider-man is cool in a nerdy, awkward way. jake is just awkward.
spider-man is confident until heâs flustered. jake is flustered until heâs more flustered.
but there are little things. things that stick in your mind and refuse to leave.
the way they both stutter when theyâre flustered.
the way they both react too strongly when you mention something embarrassing.
the way spider-man somehow always reacts to things you say about jake sim a little too specifically.
you wouldnât normally care.
except now you do so you decide to test him.
the opportunity presents itself in the middle of lunch.
shinyu is ranting about his math teacher, and youâre half-listening, half-watching as jake sits at his usual table across the cafeteria.
he looks tired.
his friends are talking, but heâs zoned out, poking at his food with a fork like it personally offended him.
for once, no one is paying attention to him.
so you turn to shinyu and casually say,
"hey. you ever think jake sim is kinda... spider-man-y?"
shinyu blinks. "what."
you shrug. "just saying. they kinda act the same sometimes."
"what kind of reachâ"
you donât get to respond.
because across the cafeteria, jake, mid-bite into his sandwich, freezes.
like, completely.
his jaw locks, his eyes widen slightly, and for a second, he just sits there, bread still between his teeth, looking like heâs buffering.
itâs only when one of his friends elbows him that he starts moving again, slowly, mechanically, chewing like he suddenly forgot how food works.
you watch this unfold with mild amusement.
shinyu squints. "okay, that was weird."
"right?"
you decide to take it further.
"also, if you really think about it, their voices are kind of similar," you add, casually sipping your drink.
jake, still trying to recover from his sandwich malfunction, visibly flinches.
his friend frowns. "dude, are you good?"
"mhm!" jake squeaks, before quickly stuffing more food into his mouth to avoid talking.
his ears are so red.
shinyu glances between you and him. "...did you just break jake sim?"
"interesting," you say, watching as jake forces himself to act normal, failing spectacularly.
very suspicious.
â
that night, spider-man shows up like always.
youâre sitting on your usual rooftop spot, legs dangling over the edge.
he lands beside you, slightly out of breath.
you tilt your head. âyou good?â
"yep!" he says. "totally! just... busy day."
you hum.
"...sooo," you start, watching him closely, "something really funny happened today."
spider-man tenses. "oh? uh. what?"
you grin. "i was talking to shinyu about how jake sim kinda reminds me of you."
he flinches.
"oh?"
"yeah," you say, leaning in slightly. "you both get flustered really easily."
"what? no, i donât!"
you raise an eyebrow. "youâre literally flustered right now."
"no, iâm not!"
you squint.
he shifts uncomfortably.
"also," you continue, "you have the same little mannerisms sometimes. like how you rub the back of your neck when youâre nervous."
his hand immediately drops from the back of his neck.
you stare.
he stares back.
"...okay, that was suspicious."
"what was?"
"that!"
"what?"
"you justâ" you gesture vaguely. "youâre acting weird."
"iâm always weird!"
"true," you admit.
he sighs in relief.
but youâre not done.
"also, your voice kinda sounds like his."
"what?!"
"just a little," you say, watching him panic. "not enough for most people to notice, but still."
"n-no it doesnât!"
"you sure?"
"positive!"
you hum.
"you definitely donât have anything you wanna tell me?"
"nope! nothing at all! absolutely nothing weird happening here!*"
you squint.
he is sweating.
interesting.
â
jake sim has fought criminals, dodged gunfire, and swung through the city at terrifying speedsâ
but this is the most nerve-wracking thing heâs ever done.
because tonight, heâs going to tell you.
heâs going to take off the mask, look you in the eye, and say it, 'iâm spider-man. iâm also jake sim. and i like you. a lot.'
heâs been rehearsing it in his head for days.
except now that heâs actually standing on the rooftop where you usually meet, waiting for you, his brain is short-circuiting.
what if you get mad? what if you feel betrayed? what if you never want to talk to him again?
he groans into his hands. this was a terrible idea.
but he canât back out now.
not when he hears footsteps coming up the fire escape.
his heart nearly leaps out of his chest.
okay, okay. just act normal. wait, noâdon't act normal, youâre always awkward. act... slightly less awkward. you can do this. you got this.
he takes a deep breath.
the door creaks open.
he turns around, already preparing himselfâ
and then immediately panics becauseâ
oh god. thatâs not you. thatâs shinyu.
shinyu blinks. âoh.â
jake freezes.
shinyu squints. âwhat are you doing here?â
"nothing!" spider-man blurts out. "justâyâknow. being spider-man. normal superhero things. ha ha."
shinyu looks so unimpressed. "right."
jake is internally screaming. where are you?? why is shinyu here instead?? he was so ready.
shinyu leans against the rooftop railing, arms crossed. "so. waiting for someone?"
spider-man stiffens. "uhâno! no, just... hanging out."
shinyu hums.
spider-man shifts uncomfortably.
there's a beat of silence before shinyu smirks. "youâre totally waiting for y/n, arenât you?"
spider-man chokes on air.
"what?!"
shinyu laughs. "dude, relax. you guys seem close, thatâs all."
spider-man doesnât know what to say.
shinyu keeps going, teasing. "you like them or something?"
spider-man malfunctions.
because the answer is yes, so much yes, oh my god yes, but he cannot say that.
so he just stands there, absolutely flustered, failing to form a single coherent word.
shinyu raises an eyebrow. "wait. do you like them?"
"WHAT? NO. HAHAHA. HA." spider-man's voice cracks.
shinyu stares.
spider-man stares back.
the silence is deafening.
then shinyu grins.
"oh my god, you totally do."
spider-man groans and buries his face in his hands. this is a disaster.
shinyu laughs. "donât worry, i wonât tell."
"thank you," spider-man mutters, still dying inside.
shinyu pats his shoulder. "good luck, loverboy."
and with that, he leaves, completely unaware that he just ruined the big reveal.
spider-man sighs so hard.
heâs going to scream into his pillow when he gets home.
â
jake sim has been so, so careful.
for months, heâs balanced both sides of his life perfectly, being the popular golden boy at school while keeping his very obvious crush on you a secret, and being the confident, quick-witted spider-man who gets to talk to you without turning into a human error message.
but all of that completely shatters in a matter of seconds.
and itâs entirely his fault.
itâs late, and youâre heading home from another study session with shinyu.
your backpack is slung lazily over one shoulder, and youâre lost in thought when suddenlyâ
"HEY!"
a voice yells from the alley beside you, and before you can react, a blur of red and blue drops down from above.
spider-man.
except something is off.
because heâs standing in front of you... maskless.
his wavy hair is messy, his expression is panicked, and his wide brown eyes lock onto yours in sheer horror.
⌠jake sim.
"JAKE?" you yelp.
"OH MY GOD." jake grabs his head like he just realized he left the stove on. "OH MY GOD, I FORGOT MY MASK. IâI THOUGHT I PUT IT ON BUT I DIDNâT. I JUST SWUNG DOWN WITHOUT ITâOH, THIS IS SO BADâ"
he starts pacing in frantic circles, muttering a meltdown under his breath. "stupid, stupid, stupidâhow do you forget your MASK? how did i even think this was a good idea? i should just move to another countryâ"
youâre just standing there, staring at him, processing.
spider-man is jake sim.
jake sim is spider-man.
it all clicks.
the awkwardness. the stammering. the similarities you swore you noticed but ignored.
you slap a hand over your mouth, because instead of being shocked, instead of yelling or freaking outâ
you start laughing.
"youâre kidding." you wheeze. "youâre actually kidding."
jake stops spiraling and looks at you like you just started speaking another language. "wait. why are you laughing?"
youâre losing it. "because this makes so much sense now. oh my god. jake."
he goes so red. "donât say my name like that while iâm wearing the suit, that feels illegal."
but you canât stop laughing. "i canât believe i didnât put this together sooner. youâoh my god, you were literally short-circuiting in front of me at school while having full-on conversations with me as spider-man."
"please," jake begs. "please let me live."
you wipe a tear from your eye, catching your breath. "waitâhold onâ" you inhale, trying to compose yourself. "so⌠does that mean⌠you had a crush on me this whole time?"
jake freezes.
his entire body locks up like you just hit him with a paralyzing spell.
you raise an eyebrow. "jake."
he doesnât move.
he doesnât breathe.
"jake," you say again. "do youâ"
"OKAYâ" he blurts out, exploding into motion. "yes! yes. i like you. a lot. i have for a really long time. and i know this is probably the worst way for you to find out butâ"
you take a step closer.
he shuts up immediately.
heâs still rambling in his head, though, oh my god, theyâre looking at me, theyâre getting closer, what does this mean, am i going to dieâ
and thenâ
you kiss him.
itâs soft, quick, and so unexpected that it completely short-circuits him.
his brain blue-screens.
by the time you pull away, his soul has left his body.
"you justâ" he breathes, voice barely above a whisper.
you grin. "you like me."
"YOU JUST KISSED ME."
"yeah." you tilt your head. "you gonna do something about it, spider-man?"
jake.exe has stopped working.
he just stands there, mouth opening and closing, until finallyâ
he just groans into his hands. "oh my god, i am so in love with you."
~
ty for reading and enjoying !
enha taglist : @minoouz
perm taglist : @s0shroe @minoouz
JSHSHSBS its always jay they messing with LMAO đđ
đŹ | Update on @ellekorea Instagram account.
mmmmmmmm
JAY: walk the line in bulacan
(video by yiingnuch)
u got texts // drabbles | sim jaehyun x male!reader
pairing: jake x male!reader
genre: fluff
warnings: first jake entry ... i am smitten with this aussie man
notes: was feeling down but yk as a writer, i decided to cheer myself using the power of delusion creativity! i hope this does make you guys feel better too when you're not feeling the love you should feel... at the end of the day, remember that there will always be people loving you. ADD ME ON THAT TOO, LOVE YOUUUU X0X0
aussie_style.png
my masterlist!
LOVE HIM SO MUCH .... he really likes u fr ... also thinking of him being ur childhood friend is just *chef's kiss*
hope you guys enjoyed it! please like, comment, or reblog~
made by writhyv.
Songs on the charts, sold-out shows, the kind of career most musicians dream aboutâeverythingâs perfect. But success doesnât fill the emptiness. And then, just when you think youâve moved onâthere he is. Your past, standing in front of you like a love song you never finished.
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË pairing â park jongseong x male!reader
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË word count â 2.8k
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË tags â male reader, jay x reader, estranged exes to lovers, famous singer!reader because we're built like that, is this angst? i have no clue, memories of your past together just hits hard ughhhh, jay has a new lover omg the drama-mama-mamah, you are dramatic as hell but we love you for you, you are insane to still think of him, i understand though you are in love with jay we see each other WE SEE EACH OTHER, more to come!
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË warning + notes â use of male pronouns, has some implied relationships, swear words, mentions and use of alcoholic substances, author's interpretation of the people in this fic might not reflect them irl, story update lengths may vary~
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË way back into love : the full masterlist
The cold Manhattan air gave you a chill as you walked towards the path from East 5th. Swimming through the dozens of people that got to their own businesses for the day, Jayâs business card only felt like burning a hole in your side pocket.
You hadnât slept.
Not after the bar. Not after you met him.
The card was still there when you woke upâcreased from how tightly youâd gripped it, the edges digging into your palm like a guilty secret.
You shouldâve thrown it out, yet here it is..
Instead, you found yourself standing outside Yves' Bean Over Eat, the cafĂŠ you and Jay used to haunt during finals week. Back then, the place had been a refugeâscented with overroasted beans and the sharp tang of sharpie ink on disposable cups.
Now, it was polished. Trendy. The kind of place you assumed Naomi would approve of.
"The usual?"Â The baristaânew, unfamiliarâsmiled expectantly.
You hesitated.
"...Yeah."
The lie tasted bitter. There was no usual anymore. Not since Jay left. Not since you traded slow mornings for studio call times and press junkets.
Luckily, they got your order right. You took a seat by the window, watching the city blur past in streaks of gray and gold.
Resting your back on the wooden furniture, your phone buzzed.
Mira:Â Atlas wants you in the studio by 11. New singleâs getting pushed up.
You exhaled through your nose.
You: Iâm asleep.
Mira: Clearly youâre not.
You: Iâm sick?
Mira: Donât ask me now?
You: Family affair?
Mira: What family?
You:Â Tell them Iâm dead.
Mira:Â Theyâll prop your corpse up on stage with a backing track.
You snorted into your matcha.
Then the bell above the door chimed.
And suddenly, Jay was there.
Blond hair slightly windswept, glasses that fit onto his face so perfectly, and a dark loose turtleneck kept in wraps under a plaid sleeve clung to his shoulders like it was made for him.
At that one second, his eyes locked onto yours, wide with surpriseâas if he hadnât spent the last 24 hours lying awake hoping youâd come.
As if he hadnât spent the last four years regretting everything.
Slowly, he walked himself up to where you were, hesitant at first to really know if it was really you.
With enough courage to muster, he spoke words like it was his first time doing so.
"H-hey," he said, his voice rough.
Your grip tightened around the cup. "Hi."
Jay hesitated, then slid into the seat across from you. Close enough to touch. Too far to reach.
"...You came."
You shrugged, staring into your matcha. "I like the foam here."
A lie.
Jay knew it.
Somehow, he always did.
His fingers tapped restlessly against the tableâa habit heâd never kicked.
"Listen, about last nightâ"
"Donât." You cut him off, sharper than intended. "Just⌠donât."
Jay flinched.
Silence stretched between you, thick and suffocating.
Outside, a taxi honked. A couple laughed. Life moved on.
Then, softlyâ
"I miss you."
Your breath hitched.
Jay wasnât looking at you. He was staring at his hands, knuckles white where they gripped the edge of the table. "I know I shouldnât say that. I know itâsâfuck, itâs selfish. But I do."
The admission hung in the air between you, fragile as spun glass.
You could shatter it with one word.
Instead, you whisperedâ
"I miss you too."
Jayâs head snapped up, eyes searching yours like heâd misheard. Like heâd dreamed this moment a thousand times and still wasnât prepared for it.
Then his phone buzzed.
Unknown Caller.
The damage was done.
You stood abruptly, chair screeching against the floor. "I should go."
"Waitâ" Jay caught your wrist. His touch was warm. Familiar. "Please."
You froze.
His thumb brushed over your pulse pointâonce, twiceâbefore he let go. "...Can we try this again? Just⌠us. For real."
You wanted to say yes.
You wanted to run.
In the end, you did neither.
"Iâll think about it," you murmured.
Jay exhaled, slow and shaky. "Okay."
You left before he could see your hands tremble.
ËăăâŚăă.ă. ăâËă.ă . â â.ăăâŚă.ăă.ăâËă.ăăâŚăË ăăâËă.Ë
The studio lights were blinding.
You squinted against them, headphones crushing your skull as the producerâs voice crackled through the intercom.
"One more take. From the bridge."
You clenched your jaw.
This song was garbage.
Poppy, soulless, manufacturedâeverything youâd sworn youâd never make. But Atlas had quotas. Algorithms. A bottom line that didnât care about artistic integrity.
You took a breath.
And sang.
The lyrics tasted like ash.
"Iâm over you, Iâm over usâ
donât need your love, donât need your touch."
A lie.
The worst kind.
When the track finally ended, you ripped the headphones off, tossing them onto the console.
Mira arched a brow from the corner. "Dramatic, arenât we?"
"Buzz off," you laughed dryly.
She tossed you a water bottle. "So. Jay."
Your throat closed.
Mira smirked. "Youâre worse than a telenovela, you know that?"
"I hate you."
"Liar." She nudged your shoulder. "Talk."
You slumped against the soundproof wall, sliding down until you hit the floor. "...I donât know what Iâm doing."
Mira joined you, stretching her legs out. "Do you want to know?"
That was the problem.
You did.
And it terrified you.
ËăăâŚăă.ă. ăâËă.ă . â â.ăăâŚă.ăă.ăâËă.ăăâŚăË ăăâËă.Ë
The call came at 2 AM.
Your phone lit up the darkened bedroom, Unknown Caller flashing across the screen like a ghost.
You stared at it.
Let it ring.
On the last vibration, you picked up.
"Hey."Â His voice was rough with sleep. Or something else.
"...Hey." You could hear relief at some point by the way he answered you.
A beat. Thenâ
âSutton Place, was it?â
Your face crumpled in curiosity. âSay that again?â
"Iâm outside."
Your heart stopped.
Slowly, you padded to the window, peeling back the curtain.
There he was.
Leaning against his car, face tipped up toward your townhome. The streetlight caught the gold in his hair, the curve of his jaw.
God did he look so beautiful.
You swallowed hard. "...Why?"
Jayâs breath crackled through the speaker. "Because I canât stop thinking about you."
Simple. Honest.
Devastating.
You closed your eyes and made your choice.
The predawn air bit at your exposed ankles as you descended the townhouse steps, the wrought iron railing cold under your palm.
Jay stood exactly where you'd seen him from your bedroom windowânot under the glow of the streetlamp like some romantic clichĂŠ, but half-shadowed where the light didn't quite reach, as if even now he couldn't fully step into the light.
"You came down," he said, voice scraped raw. His hands flexed at his sides like he wanted to reach for you, like they'd forgotten they weren't allowed to anymore.
You tugged the sleeves of your sweatshirt nervously, fingers curling into the worn fabric. "You called. And here I am, against my better judgment."
A taxi rumbled past, its headlights catching the hollows under his eyes, the new sharpness to his jaw. This Jay was both familiar and foreignâthe boy you loved sanded down into a man by time and choices and the kind of regret that carves itself into bone.
The Bentley parked haphazardly behind him gleamed under the streetlights, but neither of you mentioned it. Some truths didn't need saying out loud.
"You shouldn't be here," you said, but your feet stayed rooted to the pavement.
Right there, he can only reciprocate a breath â eyes tracing your tousled hair, and even the worn NYU sweatshirt youâd stolen from him years ago.
You tightened your arms around yourself. "Youâre blocking a five-million-dollar driveway, by the way."
Jay snorted, raking a hand through his windswept hair. "Still canât believe you live here. When I saw the address on your tour rider, I thought it was a typo."
You sighed, knowing full well how he was able to get that kind of information. He was always smart when it came to you and your whereabouts.
âLeah?â
âSarah, actually.â
âOh âŚ. that also makes sense.â You laughed it off.
The city air was quiet, almost as if it was drowning you both in the most tender moment between night and dawn.
"Atlas pays well for selling your soul," you said, watching his smile die.
Jay exhaled through his nose, the ghost of a smile tugging at his lips. "You would say that."
The first time he'd shown up unannounced back at your old dorm, it had been 2 AM after a fight with his father. Now here he was againâyour personal ghost, arriving at the most liminal hour between dusk and dawn.
"Let's go somewhere," he said, nodding toward his car.
You could have said no. Should have, probably. But the look in his eyesâthat quiet, shattered hopeâhad always been your undoing.
ËăăâŚăă.ă. ăâËă.ă . â â.ăăâŚă.ăă.ăâËă.ăăâŚăË ăăâËă.Ë
The diner was nearly empty, the vinyl booths cracked with age and the air thick with the scent of burnt coffee. You slid into the corner seatâyour seat, the one youâd claimed a lifetime ago during late-night study sessions and stolen kisses over shared milkshakes.
Jay paused by the table, his fingers brushing the chipped laminate. "Jesus. They still havenât replaced these?"
"Some things donât change," you said, watching as he eased into the seat across from you. The booth was smaller than you remembered. Or maybe youâd just forgotten how close you used to sit.
The waitressâMarge, according to her nametag, though she hadnât been here last timeâdropped two menus on the table without looking up. "Coffee?"
"Please," Jay said.
"Cola." you added. Jay looked at you with concern etched on his features.
Marge grunted and shuffled off, her orthopedic shoes squeaking against the tile.
âAt three in the morning?â
âYou know I stack up Diet every day for this.â You smiled. âThat small fridge we had was my lifeline.â
âTo this day?â He spat in shock, but not surprised. Almost as if just taken aback of the old habit.
âI mean, I can afford a mean inverter double door refrigerator.â You jest. It is true, you can definitely afford that luxury now.
âI wasnât talking about the amount of colas you can stack in a fridge.â Jay sighed, your usual bickering setting the tone for the conversationâfamiliar, easy, the kind of back-and-forth that used to mean something more.
But it didnât mean that now.
There was no playful shove after, no rolling your eyes just to hide a smile. No lingering glances that said Iâm only joking, teasing to see your face crumple so cutely.
Before, this wouldâve been the part where you leaned in, just a little, brushing your lips against his cheek before he could finish his next sentence. Before, he wouldâve reached under the table, fingers threading through yours like it was nothing, like it was the easiest thing in the world.
Now, it was just words. Just two people talking, nothing hiding between the lines.
And that was the worst partâknowing exactly what it wasnât anymore.
âItâs better than whiskey.â You retorted. Jay can only look at you with a simple gaze.
Jay drummed his fingers against the table â still the nervous habit heâd never kicked.
"So."
"So."
Another silence. The kind that shouldâve been awkward but wasnât. The kind that felt like picking up a conversation youâd only paused.
Jay sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I donât know where to start."
"Try the beginning," you said softly.
He met your gaze then, his dark eyes searching yours. "The beginningâs messy."
You huffed a laugh. "Since when have we ever been squeaky clean?"
Something in his expression fractured. For a second, you thought he might reach across the table. Might bridge the distance with his fingertips like he used to.
Instead, he folded his hands together. "I was wrong."
The words landed like a punch.
"About what?" you asked, though you already knew.
"Everything." Jayâs voice cracked. "The band. The label. You. I thoughtâ" He broke off, shaking his head. "I thought I was protecting you. From the industry. From selling out. From ⌠losing yourself."
Your chest ached. "And instead?"
The words sat there, heavy between you, like waiting for a wound to finally bleed.
"Insteadâ" He stopped, jaw tightening like the words were sharp in his mouth, like they might cut him on the way out. His voice dropped lower, rough at the edges.
"I lost you."
Just like that. No take-backs, no pretending it didnât happen.
Silence pressed in, thick and suffocating. You could hear his breath, uneven, like heâd been holding it too long. Like he hadnât meant to say itâor maybe he had, and that was worse.
And there it was, laid out between you: the truth, bare and ugly. With no way to get it back.
Marge returned with your drinks, the mugs landing with a sharp clack against the worn formica. The drinks youâve ordered sloshed over the rims, bearing no noise as the silence surrounded you. You waited until sheâd shuffled off, her orthopedic shoes squeaking against the linoleum, before speaking.
"You didnât lose me," you said, so quiet the words barely carried over the hum of the neon sign outside. "You let me go."
Jay flinched like youâd struck him. His fingers tightened around his mug, knuckles whitening, but he didnât look up.
Outside, a garbage truck groaned past, its headlights cutting through the dinerâs grease-smeared windows. For a second, the light caught the lines around Jayâs eyesânew ones, ones you didnât recognize.
The clock above the counter ticked, each second louder than the last, marking time you couldnât get back.
Funny, how everything kept moving. The world didnât stop just because something broke.
He stared at the chipped mug the waitress dropped in front of him. "I dream about this place," he admitted quietly. "Wake up reaching for you across cold sheets."
Your breath caught. Four years. Four years of radio silence, of carefully curated distance, and he says this like it's nothing. Like the words weren't grenades.
"Why now?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jay's fingers traced along the table napkins he has on the tableâaround and around in a nervous circle. "Because I saw you play last week. Really play, not that polished Atlas bullshit." His eyes met yours, dark and desperate. "And back at the wedding? You forgot the lyrics to 'Way Back Into Love' again. Just like you always did."
The admission hung between you, fragile as the morning light beginning to creep through the diner's grimy windows.
Jay reached across the table, his fingers hovering just shy of yours. "I thought I finally nailed it and I was doing the right thing. Letting you chase your dreams without me holding you back." His throat worked as he swallowed.
"But watching you up there in person again after all this timeâyou looked just as trapped as I felt."
The truth of it lodged in your ribs. Atlas's golden cage. The songs you didn't write. The versions of yourself you'd whittled away to fit their mold.
Jay's phone buzzedâonce, twiceâlighting up with Naomi's name. He didn't reach for it.
"I should go," you said, standing abruptly.
Jay caught your wrist, his grip feather-light. "Please, stay."
Two words. That's all it took for the walls to crumble.
His request hung in the air, simple yet devastating.
The radio in the kitchen crackled to life with your latest hitâall polish and production, nothing like the raw songs you used to write. Then your voice floated through the static, singing lyrics you barely remembered writing. The label had polished every rough edge off that song, sanded it down until it was shiny and hollow. A hit, but not yours. Not really.
Jayâs grip on your wrist tightened slightly, his thumb finding the flutter of your pulse.
"You must hate that song," he murmured.
You swallowed hard. The chorus swelled, saccharine and overproduced. "I hate most of them now."
Jay stood slowly, his free hand liftingâhovering near your cheek, close enough that you felt the warmth of his palm but not the touch. Waiting. Always waiting for your permission, even now.
The dinerâs door chimed as another customer entered, the bell jangling. A gust of cold morning air rushed in, carrying the smell of the city streets and exhaust. Neither of you moved.
"Call me," you whispered, pulling away. Your voice barely carried over the radio. "This time, when youâre really ready to talk about ⌠us."
You stepped out into the dawn, the weight of his gaze following you like a second shadow. Behind you, the phone buzzed againâpersistent, impatient.
You didnât look back.
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË story taglist â tagging @kaiyunsim @firstclassjaylee @ryes-brownies08
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË can i join the masterlist? â sure! i do frequent posts and updates so just be warned! leave a reply on any posts and i'll add ya in the future updates, much love~Â
đ˛ ŕšŕŁ ŕŁŞ ËâŚâË way back into love : the full masterlist
legacy masterlist! | made by writhyv đ
aaaaa you guys have been really awesome wtfffffff sorry fellas i cannot handle writing super long fics ... speaking from experience i do not WANT u guys to keep scrolling and scrolling across 10k words ... that HAS to be torture đ also to those who follow me ILY HEHE MWAMWMAWMA okay im out HAUFHUSOHFOSA
one reason i couldn't write smut ... it just feels bland because i feel like everyone has already written about it đđ also teasing you guys about it is more fun đ
unpopular opinion i'm getting bored of smut they all sound the same
he's so expensive i can't with this man đŽâđ¨đď¸
[JAY] Black & Gold đ¤ @.pomellato