Chuuya: [threatens Dazai with a knife]
Dazai: Joke's on you, now I'm horny.
bloody valentine headers + icons (requested by @mohawkells)
a/n: im gonna expand on this soon. part 2
You’ve been at Nekoma High for approximately two weeks when Kuroo finds you sitting under the bleachers in the basketball team’s main gym, chocking on your sobs. Coincidentally, you’ve also been the manager of the boys’ volleyball team for about a week.
Kuroo likes to think that even though your time at Nekoma has been short, he’s got you figured out. Keyword: likes to think.
By some miracle, you’d ended up in his and Yaku’s class, sitting diagonally from him and to the left of Yaku. A stroke of luck; well, that’s how he sees it, anyway.
He’d raced to get you involved with the volleyball team after he’d heard you mention to Yaku how you were fairly close to the volleyball team at your previous school. And he’d managed to get you to agree, though Yaku had almost slapped his soul out of his body because “She’s been here for two days, do you ever shut up about having a manager?”. But hey, you hadn’t minded.
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the ending in big time adolescence...
you get a new necklace and colson feels some type of way.
wc: 1k
tw: the use of ‘baby’ way too many goddamn times im sorry alright
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DAY FIFTY TWO: LORD OF THE RINGS: RETURN OF THE KING (2003) DIR. PETER JACKSON
“Jun and I don’t match personality-wise. I’m a sensitive type, but Jun has a carefree personality. Despite that, I feel comfortable when we’re together.” - The8
it's always "i love you," and never "eating meals we made out of habits, watching the sunlit laundry, walking side by side with a person like you, and seeing off tsumiki...i wanted to think, ah, i'm so happy."
presented without comment: the covers of 6 books that released within 3 years of each other (!) by the same NYT bestselling author, and then two quotes by said author.
make of this what you will.
Illumi will forbid their meeting. I mean his s/o and hisoka 😂 that clown will use them as a weak point somehow or a way to "dare" to threaten illumi as he did with killua in Aluka's arc 🤣. If you dont mind I encourage you to write what you think about their meeting but I wont push it as a request.
Right. This is. Ah. Silly maybe? Honeymoon with Illumi… imagine
Sometimes, when reminded of how much of a primadonna your newly minted husband could be, it was hard to believe he was also a seasoned assassin and murderer.
Apparently, Illumi was too good for fried foods. You didn’t doubt when you brought doughnuts back he’d steal one, he was just bitter that you insisted on what you wanted rather than letting him have his way. It was his own fault for assuming you’d be fine with spending your honeymoon eating the terrible things he liked.
You’d rather go out alone, anyway. Illumi had a way of drawing attention, and that was the last thing you wanted while looking like, well, like a woman after the first night of being married.
It was a weekday, meaning that the mid-morning crowd wasn’t too overwhelming as you walked down the sidewalk. The area, much like the hotel itself, was classy, but not flashy or especially exciting. A destination honeymoon had never been of interest to you, not when jobs took you all over the world. No, all you’d wanted was to be alone with Illumi, just for a little while.
The unfortunate life of an assassin was spending most of your time away and apart from those you cared about. That thought made you sigh and hurry faster, not wanting to be gone for too long.
The bakery’s sign, an overhanging board with fancy script and a picture of doughnut, was within sight when you felt it. Or, more accurately, them.
It was somebody with distinctly powerful Aura, one that held the type of dangerous intent generally boasted only by killers.
It made you tense up, but you did your best to relax, to keep moving with your head down. Even though there wasn’t a huge crowd, you were good enough at blending in to know that as long as you didn’t behave suspiciously, it would be fine. As badly as you wanted doughnuts, you turned around and began heading back to the hotel. To Illumi.
Until you were stopped.
First thought? ‘Why is that man dressed like a circus performer at ten in the morning in a place like this?’ Second thought? ‘Fuck.’
The not-so-mysterious Nen user was leaning against the wall, leg bent and braced as if displaying the high heels he was wearing. He was waving with an oddly coquettish gesture that in no way matched the slimy smile on his painted face. That wasn’t even to mention his odd attire or his vividly magenta hair. While you’d never met the man, of course you knew who it was.
Hisoka Morow was pretty recognizable, although descriptions in no way compared to the reality.
“Why are you here?” you asked, eyes already narrowed in suspicion.
“I take it Illumi has mentioned me? I hope he hasn’t said anything too slanderous, I’d hate for you to have the wrong impression,” Hisoka kicked off from the wall to approach you, his heels clicking on the sidewalk.
He was drawing all sorts of nervous side glances from the people on the street, you felt your skin prickle from the eyes. With a frustrated huff, you crossed your arms. This was the last thing you wanted.
“Why are you here, Hisoka?” you asked, voice hardened. He looked pleased by your dismissive behavior, an unnerving expression. As much as you despised the thought for its weakness, you wished Illumi would have come with you, after all.
“It seems like you’re in a bad mood. Is Illumi taking care of you properly? Should he and I have the talk?” he asked, his voice dropping suggestively, “He can be so stiff…”
You raised an eyebrow, wondering if you should be surprised, grossed out, or scared.
“Is that a fact?” you asked, keeping your voice cold.
“Mmm,” Hisoka responded, his eyebrows raising to match the deepening of his smile, “Illumi and I made our own vows long before he met you. I know him very well.”
You were glad to be saved from having to respond, not that you’d know how to, by a familiar presense. Hisoka felt him too, freeing you of his gaze.
“Hey,” Illumi didn’t sound even slightly inconvenienced, adding to the scene that was already drawing far too many eyes. As unaffected as he seemed, you didn’t miss the protective stance he took in front of you.
“I was just talking about how hurt I was to hear you got married without inviting me. Isn’t it the custom for the groom’s closest friend to be the best man?” Hisoka asked.
“Yes,” Illumi replied evenly.
Hisoka’s smile flattened.
“Is that all?” there was something hard in Illumi’s tone, frightening. Hisoka heard it too, although it seemed to cheer him up.
“Illumi-”
“If you approach my wife again, I’ll kill you.”