More Ranger's Apprentice Headcanons Because I Have No Self-Control (featuring Bullet Points!!)

This little shit's been haunting my dash for days, so I figured I'd contribute to the cause

You know the drill, click the pictures for better quality, yadda yadda yadda

He's so terrible, I love him so much. I can't believe this little shit is the first fanart I'll ever post, wtf.

Something Gained, Something Lost

Alastor has grown sick and tired of his constant inability to control his emotions. He resorts to some...drastic measures to regain it

Chapter 1/6 is posted, make sure you mind the tags before reading, there is self harm in this one

This is part 5 to the Therapy Pig series (yes I told you guys I'd get it out lol)

Grimwalker Alastor AU: The Reveal

(OG post and follow up post)

Needless to say, Alastor didn't know he was a clone. Every clone's memories were altered so that they remained blissfully unaware of that fact - it made them more compliant. Any changes they had in their appearance were included in the memory alteration so that the clone believed he'd always looked like that. Every now and then, a friend might send him a questioning look or two that he didn't understand the reason for, but eventually they all assumed that it was just something to do with Hell anatomy. After all, they were pretty minor changes, and it's not like Alastor acted differently from what they could tell.

I'm stuck between two options: having the truth revealed in front of the others or having Alastor be alone when he learns he's a clone. Instead of choosing, I'm just gonna do stuff for both lol

With the others:

Somehow, everyone at this point has learned that Alastor doesn't own his soul (hotel cast everyone, not everyone everyone)

His dealer has entered the hotel or managed to get everyone in one place and she's acting super weird with Alastor while the others are unable to do anything

He finally manages to defy her despite the terror she's ingrained in him during his time with her, but instead of actually reacting or being angry, she just kind of tuts at him in disappointment

This reveal ends up going a lot like Hunter's reveal in The Owl House, except somehow more violent and horrifying because this is an adult show, not one on Disney XD

She tuts at him in disappointment and gently cups his face while looking searchingly into his eyes. Apparently, she doesn't like what she sees there because she turns away and snaps his chains into existence (ankles, wrists, and neck to really leave him helpless as he gets yanked to a kneeling position

"How characteristically disappointing. I suppose I'll just have to do better with the next clone."

Alastor freezes and his eyes go wide, but before he can even ask what she means, his chains start burning into his skin, leaving him screaming in pain as the magic she's using buries itself beneath his skin.

Everyone else is crying out to him trying to get her to stop, but no one really understands what she's doing to him other than it's hurting him and they've never heard Alastor scream like that

It's the same way she killed the other clones when they fucked up, the magic buries into him and steals his memories and powers for the next clone before essentially melting him from the inside out

Somehow everyone manages to break free and stop her before she kills Alastor, but he's pretty badly hurt when they bring him back to the hotel. The scars where the chains were are permanent, and he develops chronic nerve pain in the aftermath

He has a huge crisis about being a clone (reasonably) and barely talks to anyone for weeks

Eventually there's a happy ending, but haven't really fleshed out how they get there because I can only assume it would be a lot of heavy stuff before that point. But the happy ending does happen

2. By himself:

This direction is a lot more low key than the first way, largely because Alastor would absolutely keep it to himself once he found out, especially considering how traumatizing it is

In this version, his dealer isn't trying to kill him, but keep him in line. He does something that pissed her off, but she spent so long perfecting this clone that she refuses to kill him in a show of temper

So instead, she tells him the truth. She hasn't tried that with any of the others, so she figures that that might just be what works

She lets him view her memories, lets him see the gruesome deaths of the dozens of past clones of himself - the gruesome death that surely awaits him if he continues to defy her. Dozens of versions of himself have succumbed to this fate, and they have tried every trick and scheme and desperate attempt he could ever think of to escape her, and none of them succeeded. Not one. He is no different, so if he doesn't do what she wants, she has no qualms restarting, as he can clearly see

Once the memories are finished, Alastor realizes that he's been silently crying the whole time. When she gently cradles his face and wipes his tears away, he realizes that no matter what he does, he's never going to escape his deal

He goes back to the hotel and isolates himself for a few days before going back to trying to pretend everything is normal, but the others can tell that he's not acting like himself and try to talk to him, but he can't tell them what the actual problem is. Even if he could, he wouldn't because he can't bring himself to speak of the things that upset him in the presence of others

He's never the same after the reveal despite how hard he pretends because now he knows. He knows that he has never been the person he thought he was, and that he had always been an intruder in his own life. Everyone notices that he's different but no one can help because they have no idea what's wrong

He stops fighting his dealer, just as she wished

For now, at least. Who knows, maybe there's a possible happy end for this route too

Sharing Alastor Headcanons

@lonely-lost-insanity (you should go check out her blog) and I were sharing headcanons about our mutual favorite babygirl piece of shit and I decided to post mine here

we borrowed @head---ache 's character ask game for inspiration on this one, so bare with me here. (also if you like Sonic, you should check them out too)

🏳️‍🌈 A sexuality headcanon: Asexual and completely sex repulsed, mostly because both the fluids involved, and other people's genitals completely repulse him. He also deals with feelings of severe shame any time he gets aroused, but that's more of a gender identity crisis than anything

🏳️‍⚧️ A gender headcanon: Though he's primarily masculine presenting, Alastor is actually genderfluid, though he only learned about it recently. Angel is the one who caught on and talked to him about it, and currently the only one who knows since Alastor isn't confident enough about it to tell anyone else

😇 A headcanon about their religion/lack thereof: His maternal grandmother was a slave who was originally from Haiti, so he grew up following the practices of Hatian Vodou. He was actually training to become a Oungan (similar to a priest for those unfamiliar) before his mother died and he got shipped off for the Great War

🧸 A headcanon about their childhood: He used to have a little hand-sewn frog plush that he cared for for years until his dad burned it in a fit of rage. Alastor never forgave him for that because it was a gift from his grandmother

👻 A headcanon about what scares them: He has a phobia of dogs from his death, but he's also scared of heights and confined spaces, and thunder gives him flashbacks to mortar fire

🎶 A headcanon about music: He has listened to and enjoys a lot of modern music, but only plays it when he thinks he's alone - Vaggie was Shook to find him rocking out to Insane Clown Posse while making breakfast one morning

👽 A headcanon about a weird quirk of there: Alastor is actually weirdly good with guns after his time in the military - they're one of the things he makes sure he's always up to date on just in case of an emergency. He can take one apart and put it back together while telling you the caliber it shoots and the brand it is. He also owns a surprising number of them, and usually keeps at least one on his person at all times

💤 A headcanon about their sleep: He has the worst insomnia, but likes to pretend that he just doesn't need sleep to seem mysterious. When it gets really bad, he'll just drink until he either blacks out or temporarily dies of alcohol poisoning. He says it's the same thing as sleeping. It's not

🦾 A disability headcanon: He had a serious hip injury when he was a kid that never healed right, and while he was in combat, the knee on the same side was severely injured. It doesn't bother him too often now, but the cane he always has isn't for show - he keeps it on him to store part of his power, and to have on-hand in case his injuries flare up (which, rather inconveniently, starts happening more after his fight with Adam - when he no longer has a cane)

💝 A headcanon about their love language: His love language is primarily touch which both makes his touch aversion easier and harder to navigate. If he likes you, he can usually get comfortable enough to express his love language, but on his bad days, he just has to go without his primary form of comfort because it would make everything worse

🫂 A friendship headcanon: Alastor and Vaggie can actually get along quite well when they put their minds to it - they're both down to earth and naturally pessimistic (though Alastor hides it better), both love spicy food, and lived surprisingly similar lives (not super similar, but moreso than they'd thought). Alastor becomes okay with Vaggie's touch faster than he did with Husk when they'd first become friends

💔 An angsty headcanon: Despite her best efforts, Alastor's mother didn't actually love him. Alastor was the result of a rape, and after he was born, she repeatedly debated smothering him - all the way until she died. Alastor knew deep down, but she still cared about him and showed him affection on her good days which is more than his father ever did, so Alastor always figured that he could just love enough for the both of them

🪢 A headcanon about their family: Alastor;s grandmother was actually the one to begin teaching Alastor about Vodou since she was a Mambo (female priest for those unfamiliar), but she died when he was 6 so he started learning from his mom and an older woman a few blocks away

📓 A headcanon about their hobbies: He actually really enjoys drawing and has countless sketchbooks with everything from ideas for furbies (straight up furby ocs lol) to landscapes to random doodles, to portraits. If anyone ever picked up one of his sketchbooks and looked through it, he would immediately die of pure embarrassment. The only things he wants people seeing are the things he shows them

👗 A headcanon about their clothes: He much prefers dresses and skirts (if wearing shorts or boxers underneath) to pants because he likes the way they move, look, and feel, but since he isn't confident in his gender identity yet, he refuses to wear them

🔪 A headcanon relating to fighting/violence: He's actually really good at hand-to-hand combat because of his time in the military, and he only improved once he went to Hell and fought all the overlords at the time. If he and Vaggie were to spar, it would be pretty close, but he could most likely beat her

🌟 A headcanon about their desires/wishes: Sometimes, Alastor wishes that he didn't have such a hard time with being touched - he can still remember the times his mother would go to touch him lovingly and he'd shy away from her, and he knows he can never go back and change it

🥇 A headcanon about what they’re best at: Overall, his greatest skill is his ability to read people. It stems from his traumatic ass life when reading people's mood had the potential to save him from getting a beating. Now it's saved his skin on multiple occasions - from interactions with his owner to spats with Vox or other beings more powerful than himself, he knows how to talk people into revealing their plans without them ever realizing they'd done so. It's also a skill that's gotten him in plenty of trouble, but for the most part it's saved his ass

🍫 A headcanon about food: He does like some sweets, but he can only have them in moderation - except for any coffee-based dessert. He would KILL for a whole tray of tiramisu

🎭 A headcanon about what they lie about: His relationship with his father. He always claims that he's always hated his father, but deep down there's a part of him that wishes he'd gotten his approval/love, and missed the father he'd have once in a blue moon when the man was in a pleasant enough mood to deal with his son

❤️‍🔥 A romantic headcanon: While he personally has no wish to have a romantic relationship, he's a sucker for reading about the sweet ones who will always go back for each other

💄 An appearance headcanon: He has fawn spots all over his back and shoulders, and it's symbolic of the fact that a large part of him died the day his mother did - when he was just a child

🖕 A headcanon relating to anger: Alastor doesn't like lashing out at people when he's angry because it makes him feel like his father. The problem is that he has a pretty short fuse naturally, so he usually just buries his claws into his palm until he bleeds to try and calm down. If he can feel an explosion coming on, he'll go to his room, lock the door and put up a sound muffling ward before destroying his furniture in a fit of rage. when he calms down, he fixes everything with magic and apologizes to the picture of his mother he keeps on his mantle before going back to what he was doing before

😺 An animal related headcanon: Surprisingly enough, dogs actually really like him which is unfortunate because of his hatred (read: phobia) of them. They'll go up to him begging for affection and he immediately starts having trauma flashbacks to his death

😬 A headcanon about the worst thing they’ve done: If you asked him, he would say that it was the fact he helped his father bury his mother's body after he murdered her, but Alastor had no choice in the matter since he was so little and the only other option would have been to die with her

😭 A headcanon about the worst thing that happened to them: He faced different types of torture for the entire 7 years he was gone. Sexual, physical, mental, emotional, you name it, Alastor probably experienced it. Then he was just shoved back into the world and told to get to work, so he still hasn't dealt with anything

😶 A random headcanon: He's a surprisingly great runner. Like yk those videos of track relay races where one person is easily catching up to everyone else after their team was falling behind? Yeah, that's basically Alastor. And he only got better at it after going to Hell and getting deer legs - which are made for running. He's got really good form too, to the point where you'd think he did track or something but nope - entirely self taught

The feminine urge to lie in the dirt and imagine all the incredibly detailed action scenes complete with background music and micro expressions I have planned in my head that will never see the light of day bc I can't come up with the plot of a whole fic for them and I'm not talented enough to animate

I was inspired by @greykolla-art to write even more angst! Yay, don't you just love pain? This is inspired by one of their awesome comics (the link is in the fic notes)

This is the first fic I've ever written and posted, and I literally woke up at 1 AM to write it, only to immediately fall back asleep once I was done. I hope to write more in the future, especially when I get back from my 5ish month hiatus around the end of November, so let me know how I did!

Halt: You ever just look back and cry-

Will: Halt, it's okay to miss your childhood-

Halt: -tears of relief that you don't have to deal with that anymore?

Will: ...Halt, are you okay?

Halt: I'm fine, why?

I saw those tickle hcs for Alastor and…Could you do Lucifer ones too? I love how ler you make him in your works, he’s precioussssss

Luci is one of my absolute favorite lers for Alastor because he's one of the only people who can genuinely overpower that deer twink, so yes, I will do some headcanons for you <3

This man is an absolute MENACE to society as a ler

He's primarily ler, though he's not apposed to being gotten back - he just absolutely refuses to let someone get him back. They have to earn it (cough cough looking at you Alastor cough cough)

His teases are absolutely evil because his favorite way to tease is whatever method makes his victims blush and stutter the most

His favorite spot to tickle also just so happens to be whatever his victim's most sensitive spot is, because he's mean like that

His favorite targets are Charlie and Alastor - Charlie because he loves making her smile, and Alastor because he loves bringing him down a peg and making the big bad Radio Demon a flustered hysterical mess

Whoever his target is changes how evil he is. If he's tickling Charlie, he'll keep the teasing toned down to mildly embarrassing and avoid completely wrecking her because he doesn't want to be too mean. Alastor on the other hand....let's just say if he isn't crying with laughter and begging for mercy by the end of it, it probably wasn't Lucifer

He's also started to tickle Vaggie more, though he's still hesitant because he doesn't want to cross her boundaries

Wings wings wings

Angelic feathers tickle WAY MORE than regular feathers, and Lucifer has 3 pairs of wings to attack people with. He's left Alastor squealing on multiple occasions by just using his wings

He likes playing games with whoever he's tickling, and saying stupid little nursery rhymes (ex: 3 little piggies, anticipation games, etc.)

This man gives the absolute WORST raspberries. He had a lot of practice when Charlie was little (which was a lot longer than most humans are little for lol) and he made up all sorts of excuses about needing to practice to get his skills back once he got to the hotel. Necks, sides, bellies, and backs are all primary spots for raspberries

Likes to let his victims flail a bit - it makes it funnier for him when they try to escape despite knowing they won't be able to

Charlie inherited her violent escape attempts from him - they both buck and thrash like there's no tomorrow whenever they're tickled

That's another reason why Alastor is such a fascinating target for him. Alastor's instinct it to curl up and take it. He'll squirm, but he won't fight, and Lucifer thinks it's one of the cutest things ever. Also, he loves the way Alastor just kicks at the air - never actually aiming for anything, just trying to get his energy out

He's always been huge on giving people cheer-up tickles, and never really considered punishment tickles until Alastor started violently bratting in his general direction, which Lucifer of course took as a direct challenge

hi!! I read a fic recently that has your name scribbled all over it, its called "For The Good Times" by Scenefox2003, its a radiosilence fic and it emotionally destroyed me-- so I thought it would be right up your alley!

I looked it up and just started chapter 3, so don't spoil anything for me yet lol. I like how it's going so far, thanks for the rec!! You know me so well😭