This Is What My Life Has Come Down To

Should I post my fanfics on here? 🤔

I've been wondering if I should post my sh*t on here since the fandom I'm writing for currently is starved as hell and the whole reason why I started writing my fic was because I couldn't find any fics for one specific character anywhere. I've posted a lot of stuff on Wattpad and other sites but never on Tumblr (not have I read much on Tumblr) so I don't even know how to go about it. But I really want to share my works anywhere I can.

Alt Alucard🎧🦢

Was rewatching The Grand Budapest Hotel and I haven't been able to stop myself from quoting this line all day. This film is just too iconic. Also everytime Dmitri is on screen, I have the time of my life

Me when Kusuriuri:

Just watched Mononoke the Movie: Phantom in the Rain

🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻

Hellsing brainrot

Alu in this btw

They got Admiral too 😮

holy shit jmart spotted in my online financial literacy class???

Presenting 'Cheating Death' with Hansol Vernon Chwe

I've been wracking my brain trying to assign an entity to this

Adding something that bothers me:

IT'S NOT "COULD OF", IT'S "COULD'VE", A CONTRACTION OF "COULD HAVE". "COULD OF" DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE. SAME GOES FOR "WOULD OF"

IT’S NOT ‘PEEKED’ MY INTEREST

OR ‘PEAKED’

BUT PIQUED

‘PIQUED MY INTEREST’

THIS HAS BEEN A CAPSLOCK PSA

DIY heart transplantation and its consequences (it’s never enough)

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Tw: blood, cannibalism (?)

Note: this was made as a submission to a writing challenge, on @the-kingofdoritos 's discord server, so my thanks go to him and everyone there!

Date: 3/2/2025

Have you ever been heartbroken?

Abandoned? 

Judged? 

Left all on your own? 

Did you ever have to pick up the pieces of your poor heart and soul by yourself because there was no one to help you?

Did you turn ugly and bitter? Lost your beauty now that your fundamental parts are missing?

Have you ever had to wipe your own tears with your bloody fingers because the shards of your crushed soul wounded your poor body? 

Have you ever felt that emptiness deep within? In your chest. It must be your heart, right? 

Well, good news, ladies and gentlemen! We have something just for you!

The human body heals, and with today's technology and techniques, it’s easy to replace limbs and even organs! Convenient, no? 

We introduce to you: DIY transplanting technique!!

With this technique, you can easily just get a transplant yourself, all you need is to get another heart! 

How, you may ask? Well, it’s easy! 

Inflict harm 

Bring justice to yourself 

Fill the void that was left by others by taking away their hearts!

Bite through their skin, break their ribs, and get your hand deep into their mortal body and pull it out like the desperate, scared, wounded animal you are. 

Be selfish because sometimes, being selfish is a form of self-care! 

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Uh-oh! 

Did your hands get bloody? 

Are your clothes now stained in crimson? 

Don’t worry! It’s not your blood, so it’s irrelevant! 

.

But something else besides your hands got stained, didn’t it? 

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Souls also get stained;

They don’t heal,

They’re unique; 

They can’t be cleaned or replaced

All your sins will follow you forever, you will rot because desperate times call for desperate measures. The blood you spill will remain deep within the void that used to be your soul.

Eternity, immortality, purity…

While your heart might be replaced by another’s, sewn into your flesh and protected by your bones, your soul can’t. 

It will forever be broken, whatever remains of it will cut into your mortal flesh and the rest will be an emptiness. But hey! What’s stopping you from trying to replace it?

What’s stopping you from using blood as glue and violence as your weapon? 

And so you start doing that,

Your survival instincts kick in, you keep chewing on people's hearts and slamming fists into their souls. 

Now there are shards everywhere… 

So you start collecting them, gently holding them in your hands so you don’t cut yourself again, so you don’t damage that fragile thing.

And the soul’s owner looks up at you. They’re on their knees, with a hopeful spark in their eyes, opening their palms so you can hand them back what you took away.

They wish to stop hurting,

They wish for the pain to stop,

But so do you.

And so you walk away, go back into your home and glue yourself together carefully. It’s bloody, it’s messy, but it’s enough, right? 

Wrong.

You’re not whole. You can’t be whole. You’ll never be whole again. There are cracks, there are empty spaces. What once was broken will never be whole again

But you are beautiful again, with crimson on your hands and lips, with the essence of other humans now rooted deep in you, you’ll carry it all forever. 

For an eternity. Souls are immortal. Pure.

You’ll carry it all forever. 

But yours isn’t pure anymore.

It’s replaced. 

I can't explain why but this genuinely brought tears to my eyes.