Work Is Nothing But A Never Ending Chain Till Death.

It will be time for bed when the cigarette hits the floor

TheSadBoisClub

My Dearest L...

The past few days have not felt real to me I've been feeling as if my world around me is nothing but a dream-like nothing is what it seems, I've been sticking into a dark place again but I seem to be slowly crawling out of my hole. I'm starting to snap back to reality, I started watching downtown abbey it seems to be trading right now so I thought I'd give it a try idk how I really feel about it yet, I'll have an updated post about it but for now, I'll just use it to distract myself from the world around me bec if I don't have anything to keep my mind busy that's when I start to over think and things tend to become bad for me. My OCD seems to be getting worse I'm starting to count things now like I have to run my fingers throw my curtains 4-6 times before I open or close the door or after I wash my hands I have to flick the water off my hands 4-6 times before I dry them.

My Dearest L…

Sometimes i wonder what i bring to the table, will it be enough for the ones i love. you know i’ve been alone i have truly forgot what love even feels like, it’s just a weird night tonight. why did my ex text me? why have people from my past all been talking to me after a year they have been super quite. i don’t inderstand it...... oh!! 

P.S. Goodnight<3 i’ll type more tomorrow 

My Dearest L...

Will i ever find the one that will make me happy to be alive??

My Dearest L...

It’s 5 am and I can find a way to fall asleep tonight. I’m supposed to take my sleeping pills, but they don’t seem to be working. How can I depend on these pills to drive me into a slumber now when 12 months about I could sleep on my own how did I get to this point???

I light my smoke, you forget are book. A story I started, which you decide to end. Time only moves slow when the smoke slips through your fingers in the bed next to me.🖤💀

Once again, I can't seem to sleep.....

My Dearest L...

If a demon ever took over my body, I’d just hand it over and be like you can take it from here... good luck bitch in my world!!

My Dearest L...

well, I may have made new friends at my new job, not sure it if will last honestly, but at least I'm trying to put myself out there as much as I don't want to. it will be nice to have some people to have tea and coffee with :)

My Dearest L...

Tonight is a weird night for me. I had a great night last night talking to texas till he went to bed, but still nothing from Mexico... I hope he's okay. back to what I was going to talk about. where do people go when we die? cause last night I was trying to fall asleep and as I was drifting off I thought to myself what if I have a heart attack tonight in my sleep. where would I go? would I just think I woke up in the morning and I just fell asleep or would it just start all over again from the begging? like a being FUCK YOU! try again... wait, one second!! what if when we fall asleep every night and die and when we wake up we come back to life but then there is that one night we drift off and don't wake up. and then billy in the corner will be like "well damn, he sure in hell hit that damn coffin hard" then the nurse will come over and say "billy get back to your room NOW!!" she's yelling because she's stressed about the dead body just laying on the bed. then billy will walk up to her and say "Debbie I'm already in my room" and of course Debbie will say some stupid shit like "fine just go for a shit then" and she'll storm out of the room stressed out and walk to the corner of the building outside and walk to her secret smoke stash under the birdhouse.