YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID. KEEP AN EYE ON YOUR BELOVED BECAUSE I THINK YOU’LL LOVE WHAT HAPPENS SOON

Not if I make him lay one first.

first 5 faceless emojis are how your summers gonna go

I have decided that the time has come to make an 'introductory post' of sorts. This won't be very fun to read, so feel free to ignore it.

ME: For those of you still reading, greetings! I'm sure you're all aware, but in case you somehow missed it, my name is Stanford Pines. I also go by Ford, but other nicknames are reserved for specific individuals. Except for Paranormal Bottom. If anyone calls me that, I am going to explode and die.

ASKS: I love receiving asks! Especially asks about my journeys through different dimensions, strange phenomena that you have inquiries about, and really whatever you feel inclined to ask. My only request is that we keep explicit asks to a minimum, since my niece and nephew like to "stalk" (Mabel's words, not mine) my social media. Mildly suggestive asks are okay in moderation.

DNI: Bill Cipher from my dimension. Alternate versions are sometimes even enjoyable to be around, but the canon Bill Cipher is not allowed here.

EXTRA: I have decided that, when my schedule allows it, I will occasionally host Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons campaigns. When the times approach, I will post about them.

EXTRA: My two favorite dimensions are 73 and 96! 73 has great cheese, and the tree frogs in 96 are the size of large dogs.

whats your opinion on this

I'm not sure whether to be flattered or offended. I will say, after an "accident" in an alien bar fight, my sixth finger can also do all that. Although, I am wary of the ballpoint pen, because it is quite leaky and I do not want any more ink in my bloodstream.

We just got our dog back from the kennel after vacation, and apparently he though we were just leaving him. On the way home, Stanley went into Subway, and now Marshall thinks he's being abandoned "again".

He's been panting and whining for the past ten minutes.

Also, we did end up taking the seat belts off of the windows. They're no longer necessary.

He ran them off. Sorry to disappoint.

He also does a little victory dance afterwards.

I'm at the Science Center right now. They're ganging up on him. They're ganging up on the pine tree.

Okay, okay. I know what happened. Stanley and the Pope were smoking weed together to celebrate Stanley's win (Stanley and the Pope are good friends), when Doofenshmirtz hit the Pope with the Haveastrokeinator 3000, which was the only invention in his entire history that worked exactly the way it was supposed to. It didn't even explode afterwards.

I just realized something. And of course this would happen. But Stanley won the Tumblr competition. On weed day. He swears up and down that he doesn't smoke weed, but considering how rank his bedroom smells, I'd say this makes perfect sense.

Happy weed day, Stanley.

Hi stanford! I am getting into journaling and since you're the author of Gravity Falls' most mysterious journals, I was wondering if you have any tips on how to start one? I don't quite know where to start.

I draw too, your illustrations are stunning!

Hello, and thank you, anonymous stranger! I have been waiting for an ask like this!

To start a journal, you must first decide what you're going to be focusing on. It could be anything from famous art to oddly colored grass clippings. As long as your writing is THOROUGH (as many details as possible), PERSONAL (allowing your own feelings to influence your observations), and RELEVANT (keeping any information written on topic/related to your topic).

Another important part of journalism is making sure your topic interests YOU. Not your peers, but YOURSELF. If you aren't interested in your own journal topic, it will be difficult to find motivation to continue keeping your journal.

That's all I have to say for starting a journal. Feel free to reach out if you have any more questions about journaling.

gleep glorp. shleep gageep norp? sorbagorp.

-shaBlorp

Unfortunately, that is not a language I am fluent in. However, something tells me there was a slur in there.

HIIIII FORDSSYYY

Ah, hello there. I have been meaning to deliver a message to you from my dear great-niece.

stanford i got a buncha metal wires stuck all up in my beard. @ fiddlesfords

Not again. At this point, I'm just going to make you shave it off.