Cassarian And Varipunzel Shippers Are Either Groomers With Pedo Fantasies Or Homophobic Christians Dumping

sometimes you gotta write a full-on ghost story reducing the 14-year-old antagonist of the first season of that dumb tangled spin-off show to a vengeful cryptid, because that’s what everyone saw him as

and make said story told by a princess whose state of nonexistence is even more severe than the other fictional Disney princesses

while sitting around a campfire with a well-intentioned 12-year-old pyromaniac, a thief who’s going to betray them, and the exact murderous cryptid she’s unknowingly weaving her tale about.

it’s gonna be called “fear is the heart of love”, and if i ever finish it, i’m inflicting the ao3 link upon you.

So he's Steven Universe?

Yong headcanons and thoughts!!! If I may!!

YONG my PRECIOUS

-he has a lot of running jokes with himself. this comes from being overlooked a lot as a kid (you have to be your own source of entertainment when people don’t want to play with you), but it eventually just became part of his nature. these running jokes include making the most diabolically sexual comments and then blinking innocently when the rest of the group whirls around to look at him. “what? does that mean something?” they are his puppets and he is their master.

-he gets eczema sometimes. varian made some olay-worthy lotion for him.

-very musically talented! hand him any instrument and he’ll make a little ditty within a couple minutes.

-he thinks varian’s the coolest, hugo is the most suave, and nuru is the most wise. then he witnesses varian spend five minutes trying to extricate his boot from a hole it got stuck in without realizing that he can use his chemicals. and then he sees hugo go bright red when varian gets fed up and scoops him off the ground, slinging him over his shoulder. then he watches nuru realize she was holding her map upside down for the last forty minutes and discreetly adjust it. then he comes to the conclusion that he, yong, is the team leader.

-certified bug lover. he will pick up a cicada and present it to hugo, who will yelp and smack it out of his hand. this cycle will repeat with more and more frightening bugs. yong is using his innocent face, but he revels in hugo’s terror.

-one of the proudest days of his life was when he made a joke that had the other three in hysterics, even hugo.

-his main love language is quality time, then words of affirmation :D

The gay river is a national landmark, thank you very much.

What's your opinion on your kid having the most popular account? (and all the anons just throwing the craziest asks on him)

I think it’s good for him. It gives him the attention he so desperately requires. I’m not so thrilled about some of the asks he gets though, some are very personal or straight up weird. (Not to mention the ones who are trying to make him sick with ice cream and “gay water”)

I really like analyzing Varigo, one thing I've noticed recently is how different their approach to romance (and human connections in general) really is, but also how they're pretty much the perfect foils in this regard.

Varian grew up sheltered away in their mansion. He didn't have much clue about socializing, so when Rapunzel came to him, he gives all of them proper respect (calling Rapunzel "Princess", Eugene "Flynn Rider", as in the full name). You could assume it's because of his dad; later when the two confronted each other, Varian called him "Sir". Probably because Quiring taught him to be respectful of others, and they both clearly take this social rule rather seriously.

So then Cassandra comes in and saves Varian, for apparently no selfish reasons. She likely just didn't want to have a child get crushed when she could've prevented it, but to Varian, this changes his view on people. Cassandra isn't just a distant figure to respect; instead, someone he could have a connection with. And this is where one of Varian's most essential traits come to light: when comfortable, he treats situations like an experiment. He immediately starts calling her by a nickname, "Cassie", to see how she would react. At the day of the expo, he keeps trying out different tactics, trying to essentially just get close to Cassandra. One could Interpret this romantically, but I personally like to think he just really wanted a friend. A lonely kid, seeing someone cool show any kind of affection for him immediately made him go "there could be something here! I need to find out!", and so he does. In his own, nerdy way.

Hugo, on the other hand. He, unlike Varian, grew up having to socialize all the time. Having to talk his way out of situations constantly, he learned to put up walls so that the most desirable results come out, benefiting him and his missions. When he weasels his way into the Team, he also calls them nicknames. In his case, it stems from a need to distance himself from people, so that he doesn't get attached. One slight exception though is Varian, as Hugo seemingly not only uses nicknames on him to keep up built-up walls, but to get a reaction out of him. This is very similar to how Varian approached Cassandra when he was younger. He's interested in Varian from early on, and he handles this in his good old Hugo fashion, because he finds Varian entertaining. Varian at first doesn't trust Hugo, but when he proves himself trustworthy, he gives in. He's willing to reach out, making Hugo more than a means to an end. Eventually, the two become friends! Then more than friends!

And then, their approaches change.

I'd like to think that it was Hugo, who fell first. Or at the very least, he's the first to realize it, and he HATES THIS. His flight or flight is activated, and he really wants to flee. He's the type to ignore his feelings, try to bury them. That's all he knows how to do, really. Especially because for what could be the first time in his life, he's actually falling for someone who is his friend. Someone who means a lot to him! He wouldn't want to ruin things, especially because he knows that betraying Variant will break the guy's heart, once he finds out. Therefore, the less pain, the better.

Varian is the exact opposite of this. It takes him a long time to figure out what he feels, and that it could be romantic (he didn't exactly have the history with romance before. The "puppy crush" on Cassandra could have easily been more of an obsession with the possibility of someone showing affection towards him). But once he realizes that there's a chance that the two could be a thing? He doesn't have to think hard about what his next step should be: he likes Hugo, and he's a scientist. Trial and error is practically in his blood at this point, so if there's even a small possibility of them getting together? That Hugo likes him back? Varian will do anything to find out how probable his theory is. And so, once again, he treats the situation like an experiment. Wasting no time, he tries to confess or bring up the idea as quickly as possible. And Hugo FREAKS OUT. He's not ready!

Varian's other big trait is his stubbornness. He's not satisfied with an uncertain answer. He wants to know Hugo's view on them, as clearly as possible. So he keeps poking around, trying to find an approach that brings out different reactions, different answers as to why Hugo would be scared of them being together. Again. Really similar to how he treated Cassandra at the expo back then. This is the only way he knows how, though. And he needs clear answers.

He gets one at the last trial. Boom. Heartbreak. This isn't about angst though, so I'll end it here.

I find them so interesting. How their upbringing influenced their view and approach to people, to friendship, to romance. To each other. They are both scientists, but one is more afraid of the results than the other.

So it all boils down to the importance of clear communication: another big theme in Vat7k, what with Ulla and Donella setting an example as what not to do.

I could ramble about these characters for ages, but yeah. This is my view on them, I loooove reading different Interpretations in fan fiction though!

Varigo shipper like me are hungry for Hugo to wear a green dress

guys hear me out... this "i want" song is so Nuru coded

I have no thoughts other than library depression now. I don't even know how a library can be depressed, but it is.

I have no thoughts other than library depression now. I don't even know how a library can be depressed, but it is.

I still REALLY need to read it (I'll get around to it eventually)

okay guys i’m gonna read the silent opera

i have the slightest theory that varian and the seven kingndoms could become real but im probably delusional

and my evidence?

these😭😭😭

because idk why but it feels a LITTLE ODD for jeremy to drop a tts varian and cass signing randomly but AGAIN, I COULD BE DELUSIONAL so dont take this too seriously im just a man

(the second pic isnt very specific but its jeremy jordan and others posting about an upcoming varian and cass signing on insta)