William The Conqueror: I Shall Take England For Normandy And Become Its King

pretentious moment incoming but why is everyone's idea of fashion so fucking boring these days. why the fuck did my manager just ask me "what's with the scarf". "what's with the scarf" fuck man do I need a reason to wear a faggy little scarf now? you could just say "nice scarf man". what's with your attitude

how is a little freak like me supposed to make it in this world

The reason it is warmer today is because Henry Kissinger is burning in hell

Stan Rogers songs come in a few, occasionally overlapping flavors:

this boat is a heavy-handed metaphor for my personal struggles (Mary Ellen Carter, Last Watch, Barrett’s Privateers, etc)

I am being ground beneath the heel of Capital (Fisherman’s Wharf, Tiny Fish for Japan, The Idiot, most of them really)

Weeeheehee we’re shitfaced and having a great time! I recommend it!! (The Wreck of the Athens Queen, Giant, etc)

my romance is pure and true and yours is mere lust, you barbarian (You Can’t Stay Here, Lock-Keeper, Half of a Heart, etc)

an ode to something incredibly Canadian (Bluenose, MacDonnell on the Heights, Northwest Passage, etc)

will wood songs be like

*funky piano* what gender am i

morality is stupid and doesnt exist

im so fucking drunk holy shit

we're all gonna die one day (^-^)

I haven't eaten for three days.

acab

cowboy time !!! oh and drugs ig

i should be in a psych ward

yoo remember when we thought the world was gonna end? me neither

who am i

I'm so sorry for not showing you emotional vulnerability and I really love you, and trust me I'm trying to make those repairs to show you more love, and I'm trying to improve myself.

cum on me please

vampire prettyboy wants to suck your blood TODAY!!!!(with your consent ofc)

rats all the rats i want to be a rat let me be a rat

You will actually sob nonstop for ten minutes.

hey dawg you see that culture over there yeah fuck that

wow im so gosh darn normal (im lying please help me)

pete seeger singing a phil ochs tune is the greatest thing to ever witness

Reading a Terry Pratchett book is literally just: Here's a funny little joke Here's something that you can tell is a joke but don't get and will only figure out five years later Here's a surprisingly cool fantasy concept Here's a unique and well written simile Here's a lil guy Here's something that has aged depressingly well into the modern day Here's something that has aged remarkably queer into the modern day Here's a character that you can barely understand what he's saying Here is the most terrifying and deeply disturbing concept you have ever heard, casually mentioned Here is the dumbest fucking pun you've ever heard but in the best way Here is a quote so profound that it makes you view morality and the world in a different way Here is a plot twist that you can't tell if it's genius or stupid Congratulations! You've finished the book! It has fundamentally changed you as a person and you will never be the same!

JULIUS CAESAR HAS BEEN DEAD FOR 2069 SLUTTY, SLUTTY YEARS

every time i make a mistake im like theyre going to put me down like a sick dog

ah, yes,,, my 3 alignments,,,,