💚 Send This To The Twelve Nicest People You Know Or Who Seem To Have A Good Heart, And If You Get

I've been typing "hehehe" a lot more. Like a little gremlin

rb to explode a terf ^_^ nonrefundable ^_^

Self care is watching this with sound

three person poly relationship made up of two people who are already dating trying to coax someone with horrific self worth issues into a loving relationship. stray cat style

Tmnt 2012 Good Genes episode could've gone so hard

Hi

free him he did some of that but his haters are annoying

Art that's technically supposed to be AU related but there's not much that gives it away so it's like whatever lol

IUTSIUSTYIRSHRISDFHJXFHJ HOLY CHALUPA THIS IS SO GOOD I'M 💘💖💞💖💞💘💘💞💖💞💖

AUFFUHFFH THANK YOU SO MUCH,,,,,

Another fanfic of an AU! @teks-emporium, I cannot remember the last time that I was allowed to go this nuts about AUs with someone, but I swear we’re on the same brain waves with literally everything and I love scheming about traumatized turtles with you!!

You have brought me joy and I want to return the favor! :D

Check out the Ghoul AU after ya’ll read this.

If you like horror AUs, it’s one for you!

The kitchen is ravaged.

Every pantry is open, devoid of the food within. All kinds of different snacks, some older and some newer, are sprawled across the island in a pile, spilling onto other bags, boxes, and over the floor.

Three bags of chips, the same flavor, two previously opened and one newly open, seem to have been flung into the sink. An oreo container with one cookie gone, a trail mix packet barely touched, and a full skittles packet are all snacks that others in the household will not appreciate finding touched, much less eaten.

The fridge hangs open loosely and the inside fairs no better, spoons in cottage cheese containers and meat packets torn open. The area smells faintly of vomit, collected in the trashcan next to the island.

He takes a soft breath, blue curtain swishing behind him, heading to the other end of the room. There the culprit sits, chin on his knees and hands over his head, breathing like he’s holding himself off from hyperventilating. He doesn’t react to the new presence.

“My son.”

His breath hitches, voice weak, “Sensei.”

Yoshi sets his cane against the island and kneels down. An apple with a single bite out of it rolls off the counter. It hits the floor.

Donatello flinches hard.

“In for two,” He coaxes. “Out for four. With me.”

Donatello lowers his hands, placing them around his legs, copying his rhythm. They breathe until Donatello releases a shaky laugh, bringing his hand to his face, shielding it as his shoulders hitch.

He exhales slowly, lowering one hand and wiping his eyes with the other. The lower part of his mask is a darker color.

“Sorry, Sensei.” Donatello shakes his head, fax smile twitching uncertainly. “I thought everyone was asleep.”

“Leonardo said you weren’t feeling well.” Yoshi motions for him to move forward. Donatello rises shakily, head bowed, getting onto his knees and letting him lay a hand on his forehead.

“I—I’m fine, Sensei.” He mutters, uselessly. They both know that he is never a reliable source when it comes to his own health.

Yoshi does not feel abnormal heat. “You are pale, Donatello. And you were throwing up.”

“I can’t eat.” Donatello glances over his shoulder, as if waiting for the food to react. “Anything. I tried it all Sensei.”

“Lose off appetite is common with illness.” Yoshi soothes curiously. “You would know that.”

“It’s not- I’m not- not hungry, Sensei.” He tries. “I just can’t eat it!

“When did you last sleep?” Yoshi wonders out loud, watching his face drop into something more familiar as he whines, “I sleep fine.”

“That was not my question.”

“I don’t think I am sick.” Donatello pushes, with a lot less force than he normally has when in denial. Yoshi’s grateful that he gets to be one step ahead of an illness, for once. “How do you feel.”

“I-“

“If you tell me you are fine, we will go to the dojo, where you will be able to prove how fine you are.”

Donatello’s beak reddens. Some color, good.

“Achey, I guess.” He rubs his arm. “Maybe a little shaky, but that doesn’t mean-”

“Vomiting.” Yoshi reminds. He frowns, “Only when I eat!”

“You cannot force your body to ingest what it doesn’t want.” Yoshi watches him deflate. He considers him. “When did you last eat?”

“I don’t know.” He mutters. “I haven’t really been hungry.”

“Since?”

“I don’t know.” He says, more bitterly. “That’s the problem. I should be hungry, shouldn’t I? Why can’t I eat? I tried everything.”

“Did you try tea?”

Yoshi expects him to roll his eyes or rush a change of subject before he’s encourages to try some. Instead, his expression lights up, “Do you think that’ll work? I mean, I haven’t experimented with liquids but if I don’t like what I normally like then maybe I’ll like what I-”

“Donatello,” He interrupts, gently. “I think you should rest.”

No hesitation. “I’m not tired, Sensei.”

“You are not hungry.” Yoshi reminds. “And yet you attempt to eat.”

“That’s different!” Donnie pleads, fists clenched in his lap. “This time it’s different, Sensei, I know it is!”

“How many times have I heard that?”

“Senseeei!”

“You need to sleep.”

“I need to figure this out!”

“We have.” Yoshi sets a hand on his arm. “You are ill.”

“I’m not! That doesn’t fit my theory at all!”

“What is your theory?”

“I’m not sick!”

Yoshi lowers his head, tilting it toward him knowingly. “I am no scientist, but that does not sound like much of a theory, my son.”

His shoulders slump as he heaves a sigh. Yoshi sets a hand on his shoulder, “I will take care of the mess. You will rest.”

“Y-you don’t have to do that, Sensei.” Guilty eyes dart to the island. “I can do it. You don’t need to worry about it.”

“I am a father.” He moves the hand to his face, cupping his chin to stop it from turning away, brown gaze meeting brown. “It is my job to worry. I would worry less, if I knew my sons were all healthy.”

“Hai Sensei.” His son whispers. “Sorry.”

“I am not upset.” He lets him go to reach to the side. When he stands, his son rises with him, wringing his hands. “Are you sure Sensei? It’s my mess.”

“I am certain.” To prove this point, he moves for the fridge, removing the bag of carrots that it holding the door open. He sets it on a clear spot on the counter, giving Donatello a soft look. “Sleep, my son.”

He nods, paleness regained, and then hesitantly goes from the room.

Yoshi returns the kitchen to its previous state before removing the vomit from his home. When he returns, he goes to turn in himself. If Donatello allows it, he’ll see if he can use his new positive view of tea to his advantage in the next evening.

For now, he trusts that some sleep will do him so good.

He was wrong on many accounts that day.

The first mistake was not checking a lab for a scientist.

I really enjoy looking at Donatello's characterisation - especially the 2012 version of Donnie.

I don't know why, but something specifically about the 2012 iteration of our favourite brothers draws me to them. Maybe it's because I think they have the most interesting and unhealthy brother dynamic to explore out of any version of the Turtles. But just to say right off the bat, I don't agree with the statement that Raphael is abusive toward Mikey in this version. I don't think this to be true at all.

But in the 2012 version of Donnie, I think it's the obsessional aspect of his character that I find interesting. People flame him hard for it - which is very valid - the way he treated April was very creepy, and some of the things he did April had no knowledge of, (Like Donnie taking a photo of her and having it as his laptop wallpaper). But I like doing a little more when it comes to characters' less-than-ideal traits. Yeah, what they're doing is bad, creepy, etc. But why exactly might they be acting that way?

For Donnie, I think his problem is how he looks.

In the 2012 iteration, we never really see the turtles have a strong desire to be human. Mikey sometimes doesn't understand that humans will be scared of him, but he never lashes out and has a big moment like, 'I want to be a human so I can make more friends!' We see Mikey wonder what he'd look like as a human in an episode after Donnie creates retromutagen - with Mikey assuming if he used retromutagen on himself he'd turn human and not back into a regular turtle.

It is played as a joke, though, and he doesn't seem genuinely upset by the fact he's stuck as a turtle, as he is seen smiling after saying he wondered what he'd look like.

Interestingly enough, Donnie is the one to be portrayed as having a negative view attached to being a mutant more than any of his brothers.

Outside of being a mutant, it is implied that Donnie already has a fragile self-image anyway.

Remember the episode Turtle Temper? I think it's the third episode of the first season. But at one point, the other turtles are instructed to shoot arrows at Raph, while Raph has to try and avoid the arrows. Splinter makes it clear, however, that Mikey, Leo, and Donnie are allowed to insult Raphael during the exercise.

I've seen another content creator say that the insults they throw at Raphael could be more them self-projecting views they have on themselves rather than them actually thinking these things about their brother. Leo says, 'And you're always whining, poor me, nobody understands me.'

While this is easily applicable to Raph as an insult from Leo - Leo does have his own fair share of moments where he has gone to Splinter complaining that the others aren't listenting to him or respecting him, that they don't understand the burden he has to hold as leader.

Mikey tells Raph he moves like a bloated buffalo - which, although never hinted at in the show, could imply that maybe Mikey is insecure about how much he eats. Maybe his brothers have made comments about his greediness.

Donnie says, 'Oh! You can't keep your back straight during Omote kote Gyaku! And you're ugly!'

I think the first part is interesting as Donnie is the tallest out of his brothers - gangly limbs could mean Donnie has more difficulty knowing how to stand, where to place his limbs, etc. Donnie most likely is sat over a desk all day, and again, being tall, Donnie has more of a slouched posture out of his brothers. I think it was Karai that also insults Donnie in an episode by calling him scrawny, in which he responds, 'And I'm not scrawny! I'm svelte!' Svelte meaning slender and elegant.

Raph has also insulted Donnie's looks before in an episode, and again, it is unclear if this is a common occurrence, but knowing 2012 Raph's character, it's probably happened on more than one occasion.

Donnie : And why do you keep grabbing me by the face? What is wrong with my face?!

Raph: Do you want me to list the reasons alphabetically or in descending order of grossness?

So regardless of being mutated or not, it seems Donnie just has a generalised lack of confidence and some issues surrounding how tall he is.

But to his issues regarding being mutated.

Donnie might've previously not had any issues with being a mutant. Before, it might've been just a general lack of confidence, as I have already said. But in society, looks are always seen as a good trait to possess if you want to have any shot at a love life. You need to fit into the beauty standards and be attractive if you want a partner.

Before April, his brothers would've been the only thing to compare himself to. He lived in a home with only mutants for fifteen years of his life - so had normal teenager issues of going through puberty and insecurities. A lot of people can feel odd/uncomfortable and dislike their growth spurts, which is why Donnie's issues at first might seem like normal things for a teenager to worry about. Donnie's biggest issue would've been how scrawny and lanky he saw himself.

But when they meet April, there is a glaring difference.

Suddenly, there is somebody in his life who isn't a mutant like him. It becomes abundantly clear to Donnie that from somebody else's standpoint, their biggest issue with him wouldn't be his tooth gap or his height, but just the plain fact that he's so different. Inhuman. Out of the ordinary. A mutant.

When he's rambling to Timothy (Mutagen Man at this point) about why April might be on a date with some punk kid (Casey) the conclusion he resorts to is, 'Because he's human, that's why.'

At the end of the episode A Foot Too Big, when Donnie apologises to April, he says, 'I'm just... a mutant.' Again, this shows Donnie jumps to the conclusion that this is why April doesn't want to be with him, not his overbearing nature or the fact that she just genuinely might not be interested. The problem in Donnie's mind is that he's mutated.

The fact that Donnie used the word 'just' implies that being a mutant is all that Donnie has boiled himself down to. He thinks that his other traits aren't worthwhile or good - like him being funny, smart, inventive - because he thinks that nobody would pay attention to him. At the end of the day, he thinks nobody will be able to see him outside of being a monster.

In Fungus Humungous, the hallucination of April that Donnie experiences calls him an 'ugly mutant freak'. It is unlikely April actually thinks this of Donnie, but it's what Donnie thinks she does because it's his biggest fear. I'd like to split Donnie's hallucination into two parts. April insulting Donnie about being a mutant, and Donnie's hallucination of April kissing Casey.

We see April kissing Casey. I think the fact that this part of the hallucination comes second is meant to represent that this fear of rejection and not being able to find love is two sides of the same coin. His fear of April choosing Casey is a by-product of his main insecurity. We are shown April calling Donnie an 'ugly mutant freak' first. Donnie isn't afraid of rejection in itself.

In the first half of the hallucination, it shows that April uses a sharp tongue like a whip.

This tongue is shown to go through Donnie's heart and subsequently breaks it.

"To have a sharp tongue" means to be quick to criticize, speak harshly, or make cutting remarks; essentially, someone who is often unkind or sarcastic with their words.

I think this represents that, over anything, it is April's words that break his heart more than her actions. It is her disgust at him being a mutant that shatters him. It's what makes him crack in the episode. He starts screaming, runs away, and shouts that he, 'doesn't want to hear anymore.' This is Donnie's breaking point. Her sharp tongue and words, over her actions like kissing Casey, that is Donnie's true biggest fear.

Donnie doesn't want to be with April purely because he loves her. To Donnie, it would be more than April simply making a choice on who to partner up with. It would be confirmation for Donnie that the issue all along was because he's a mutant.

The point I'm trying to make is that Donnie is obsessed with trying to improve his own self-image than actually liking April.

He wants to use April as a means to prove someone could love him despite appearances because, as I said earlier, looks are important to a lot of people. Gaining a romantic partner would most likely grant Donnie the confidence, the consolidation that he 'isn't ugly after all' because he managed to gain a partner. That is why he so desperately chases after April.

He chases after the feeling of confidence.

His character kills me.