Well! Spider It It! 🕷️❤️😘😍🥰😌☺️🥳🥹😁😉✨👉🏻👈🏻

Yes, you are. You may not openly show it, but you care about people! We all know! Or at least, some of us do! 🕷️❤️🥰😍😘😄😁😆😉😌☺️🤣😂💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

... I can't even send a gif? Boooring!

Fascinating that you have been testing it.

Are you bored or are you jealous of the new case I'm working on?

can we get some slenderman x s/o cuddling/sleeping together headcanons! like how they cuddle each other in bed, how they manage to sleep together, whether slender sleeps stiff or flips and turns; anything like that ^^ - ☆

Not like there's an issue where they couldn't sleep together?? Obviously any non-humans have beds that are big enough to fit them~ Slender is over 7 feet tall, he's not sleeping on a normal human bed

That counts on IF you can even get him into bed. Slender is a certified workaholic and there are many nights where you go to bed alone and wake up alone. It's an unfortunate part of being in a relationship with him, but at least 4/7 nights in the week you'll probably be alone in your bed, depending on the time of year.

When he is in bed with you, Slender doesn't move. His body tends to be as exhausted as his mind, and whatever position he settles down in, he's going to wake up in. Slender tends to spoon you on most nights, whether you're snuggled into his chest or if he's wrapped around you, that's generally the default position. Slender doesn't ever let you spoon him because his back is a spot of weakness for him (power-wise), and if he wakes up like that he'll probably get pissy and shift away from you. His favorite position is just to have you in his arms, as holding onto you relaxes him.

His favorite thing in the morning when he wakes up is to just watch you for a bit. You look so cute to him when you're sleeping, so content, so happy, so peaceful, and he'll lay there lovingly gazing at you for a few minutes before he has to wake up officially for the day and start his job. The sight of your face is his absolute favorite thing to wake up to, and he likes to say that it's the best way for him to start the day.

I'd love that! But why do you seem to want to keep me away from @criminalisticonsultant??? 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍☺️🤤😉😋😁😌😅😳👀🥺🥹👉🏻👈🏻

Speaking of whiskey...

...You still have the one I imported?

I see! I'm not a stranger to hip pain though, because my human form does have hip dysplasia, and unfortunately it's really prone to either inflammation (which also means it'll fill up with water) or it jumps out of socket/dislocates, and that really unpleasant! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍👀💯😅😳🥲🥹🥺😭🤬👉🏻👈🏻

Hey, regarding your hip, could it be that you have hip dysplasia by any chance? 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍👀💯✨👉🏻👈🏻

Hello darling,

I think the problem is simply that I am becoming sort of an Old Fogey, my dear. ;-)

I meant how undertakers behaviour with his gf when alon 😉

The Undertaker is always cracking jokes, making his girlfriend laugh was one of his favorite things to do. Your laugh lit up his day and made him smile, no matter the situation. He’s known to be a bit touchy when it comes to his scars, but you reassure him of course. And when he wants to get into the mood, you feel it. He pushes his hair away from his eyes and smirks, watching your every move hungrily. But he’s a gentleman and won’t touch without consent. He may give occasional shoulder kisses and hugs from behind but he’s always waiting and patient. Hell he waited for a long time for you, what’s a few more months or years?

...Should I be worried? 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍😇🙂🥺🥹🤨😳😉😌☺️😅😂🤣✨💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

merry crimemas, what crime are you planning on committing?

sodomy

Crack Scenario: The Trix seeing Palladium's pre-evolution form

I know the true nature of his 'evolution' is unclear in canon, so for this little scenario, I'm going off of the HC that it's a spell

So imagine this: The Trix are attacking some fairies in one of Palladium's outdoor classes. Of course, Palladium is fighting them off while his students get to safety. Then, something happens (maybe Darcy casts a certain spell) and Palladium's evolution spell breaks

The Trix, for a moment, are silent, in shock. Then they just start RIOTING

Like:

"OH MY WITCHES, LOOK AT HIM, HE'S A GODDAMN TWINK"

"HE LOOKS LIKE THE KIND OF GUY WE'D SHOVE INTO A LOCKER, I CAN'T"

"I JUST CAN'T TAKE HIM SERIOUSLY"

Then they either decide to finish beating his ass, or they just straight up leave, because they're not beating up this little shrimp of a man when there are goody-two-shoes fairies they can torment

Yes, I was! I was just too drunk to say no and accidentally turned into my human form! 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍☺️😌😁😉😋😅👀😳🙂😏👉🏻👈🏻

👀

.....Ah, it's a "sip of the ol' 50 year whisky day".

Can we get some headcanons on how the slender bros celebrate Christmas please?

Slender brothers

Christmas was always spent together when they were little, and nothing has changed since then.

Well, except their height and self-control whenever they want to cry.

While having brothers, Slender’s family resides at the manor. The proxies, creeps, and various beings they’ve brought home have all wormed their way into his cold, dead heart, and Slender would rather spend it there than in his empty childhood home like originally planned.

They group together in the Study Room of the manor, grown men dressed in pajamas circling the twinkling tree at the crack of dawn.

They exchange gifts, and drink coffee to wake themselves up in order to deal with the chaos for later in the day.

Slender cooks the food, Splendor helps while making a bigger mess, and Offender and Trender make their place as the trouble middle children and snatch edible (and non-edible) ingredients.

Offender is infamously known to eat all of the raw dough before Slender can even get it out of the fridge. 

Slenderbeings aren’t affected by things that are usually inedible by humans, and he’ll just take gross bites out of anything in the kitchen that remotely looks like food (including people).

Trender stops after stealing chocolate chips and supervises the manor residents around the main Christmas tree, and Splendor joins soon after being kicked out of the kitchen. 

After the food is shoved in the many ovens, the brothers are reunited once again, and begrudgingly wait for their mother to arrive and shove embarrassing gifts in their non-existent faces.

hi again! how would it be if brian and tim get in a polyamory relationship? thank u for your content you are amazing jajhdbsb💖💖💖💖

Total loving goofballs. And iLy- uwu

Poly!Tim & Brian

Tim calls Brian ‘B-man’

And Brian calls Tim ‘Time’ or 'TT’ or his favorite, 'Tim man’.

They’ll come up with dumb nicknames for their s/o too.

Like 'crayons’ bc they have to share you all the time.

Really confuses tf out of other people.

Tim and Brian are smart individually, but dumb as hell when they’re together.

Tim will be the one trying to find a way to carry you both at the same time and probably almost dropping one of you.

And Brian will build pillow forts at midnight.

Sometimes their alters will poke their heads into your relationship.

Hoodie will make everyone pizza rolls and chicken nuggies at 4:00 am when you and Tim are asleep after he’s pulled an all-nighter.

Sometimes you’ll wake up with Masky .3 inches away from your face in the dead of night.

And there are times when Masky and Hoodie take control at the same time and you have to figure how to keep two full-grown men from raiding your fridge and then being questioned later as to who ate their food.

One time you walked into a room and they were locked eyes with each other and did not move for a good fifteen minutes.

Masky and Hoodie never mentioned it, and ofc Tim and Brian don’t remember it.

Surprisingly, Masky and Hoodie and very gentle with you.

Especially Masky who doesn’t quite know his strength and tends to treat you like glass.

Tim and Brian will bicker (lovingly) often over who gets to spend the day with you, which usually ends up with you all lazing around on the couch.

You have to break them apart bc they play wrestle too much with each other.

And with you, of course.

When Tim wrestles, it always ends in a makeout session, and Brian usually ends up dragging you to the couch

Brian’s overprotective of Tim, and Tim is overprotective of you.

It’s rock paper scissors for who sleeps in your bed.

If Brian gets kicked out you’ll wake up to him nudging his way under the blankets and up against your back.

Brian cuddles more than Tim, but Tim has those heartfelt hugs and cuddles uwu