Hello Deery, Back Like I Promised Lmao

Mae Borowski with the lithromantic color scheme !

imagine mistaking beastzai as your usual dazai (you thought he wanted to be emo for a day) and like did usual silly cute things with him then dazai came home and he’s like HUH WHO IS THIS GUY R U CHEATING ON ME :(( but in the end you have… double boyfriends but one’s moody and one’s fucking annoying

anons that think alike omg telepathy … use ur powers for good!!! two asks in one btw i feel so productive

alsooo beast!dazai would be giddy like a child to be in the main tl w his love… he’d be twirling you around and enjoying what could’ve been before he has to go back!!! all dazais are cringy and in love w u it's true they told me themselves !!!!

“What’s with the outfit?” You spoke bluntly, clearly a little put off by the reappearance of the black coat and red scarf. “Dude, you look like Mori.” Harsh, sure, but your boyfriend worked so hard to walk alongside you in the light, so the last thing you wanted was to see what would’ve been, if not for — 

Dazai smiled, seemingly amused. “Ah, love, it’s merely a costume. Thought you’d get a kick out of it,” he replies easily, pulling off the long red scarf: a staple of the Port Mafia’s boss.

His words help to relax you, letting out a small sigh as you push the coat off of his shoulders. “Let me grab you your coat, I know it’s around here somewhere…” You flittered about your shared apartment, pulling a backup brown coat from its spot buried underneath your closet. “This better suits you,” you speak under your breath as Dazai pulls it on. The fit seems a little… different. Is it somehow looser than normal? You frown.

“Thank you, love,” he repeated the same pet name. It felt as though he missed saying it, which doesn’t quite make sense.

You choose not to dwell on it — maybe seeing him in black again just rewired your brain for a moment. He’s alive and well in front of you and nothing else matters. A nod is all the reply Dazai gets before you slip on your shoes.

“I thought you might have headed to work early when I didn’t see you in bed this morning, but I guess that’s my fault for assuming the impossible,” you decide to tease.

Dazai easily slips behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin against your shoulder. “Mm… I love you, you know that? Let’s skip work today. We can spend time together, ‘kay?”

He’d always been unpredictable and spontaneous, so you merely laughed in response. “I don’t have work today, remember? But you still do.”

Shaking his head, he pouts — there’s the Dazai you love. “Nope!~ I refuse to go into work today. I’m spending my whole day with my love!” He practically jumps for joy, hands moving to gently hold your waist. “Let’s bake cookies.”

There isn’t much you can do, watching with an amused grin as Dazai unties your shoes before dragging you to the kitchen.

“It does not take two hours to make cookie dough…” you sigh, trying to jostle the white flour from your hair. “We baked cookies together, like, two weeks ago! How could we already have forgotten everything…”

Dazai grins, planting kiss after kiss on your cheeks, melted butter staining your skin from when he accidentally tried to drink from the cup you’d used to soften it. “Hard to remember much when I’m with you.”

“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” You chuckled, grabbing a towel from the counter to wipe both your face and his lips.

“Yep!~ It’s like.. my love is so pretty I can’t think when I’m around them! Oh, I could just die in… No! I don’t even want to die! I could live in your arms, grow old together and watch you get all frail and saggy,” Dazai speaks dreamily, swooning over the idea of growing old with you. How sweet.

You push him away gently and begin balling up the chocolate chip cookie dough, pressing it onto the silver pan you made Dazai buy when you first started staying over. “Saggy? No, I’ll be young and beautiful forever,” you joke, but Dazai only nods in response.

“It’s true! No one holds a candle to my love. Why, I wish I could spend every day just staring at you.” Dazai’s voice always sounded teasing when he was with you, but even as you put the last of the cookie dough onto the tray (only had enough to fill one, since Dazai kept spilling, throwing or eating the ingredients..) you could feel the genuineness in his words.

Oven preheated, you slid the sheet in to bake (making sure to start the timer) before turning to Dazai. Before you could get a word in, the front door to your shared apartment creaked open. Heart dropping to your stomach, you grabbed the closest thing to you: a whisk your boyfriend had licked clean. Said boyfriend only seemed to sigh, falling into a more somber mood, head hanging before he sent you a sad smile.

“I think the jig is up, love…”

Your name is called from the front door, the voice… suspiciously familiar. “Are you in there? You weren’t answering your phone and I got worried...” Dazai stepped into your apartment, hanging his keys by the door before turning around (an addition you made, since he tended to forget his and jumpscare you by picking the lock every few days).

The three of you stood still, no words spoken and the only sound being that of your metal whisk dropping to the floor. Spinning from one Dazai to the next, you wiped a splotch of flour from your shirt collar. You felt guilty for some reason, like you were at fault for not recognizing an imposter Dazai, and wanted to make yourself look more presentable.

“Awww, love!” The Dazai at the door pouts, throwing his coat on the floor as he quickly heads over to you. “Are you cheating on me?” He continues, slouching over you to impose as much of his weight as he can. You struggle for a moment, his bone crushing hug enveloping more than you expected.

Guilt still apparent as your tummy twisted, you shook your head. “I didn’t— “

The other Dazai, the one wearing a black tie and covered in various cookie ingredients pouted as well. “Maybe she’s cheating on me! I mean, I can’t believe my love moved in with another man…”

God, this was too confusing. You gently pushed Dazai A off of you, stepping back from the two. “I don’t— “

“I can’t believe this… I head to work early one time and now you’re making cookies for someone else!” Dazai A whined, face smooshed against the oven door’s glass in longing. “I’ll never be on time again! In fact, I think I’ll always have to be late.”

Dazai B pulled Dazai A back towards him by his collar, whispering obnoxiously, “I’ll share the cookies if you share the beautiful partner.”

Dazai A nods in approval, eyes closed and arms crossed like it was the easiest decision to make in the world. “I want half the sheet. And, I want a kiss…” He pouts towards you. Ugh, how annoying.

You deadpan towards the two, no longer feeling guilty. These two were just as much Dazai as they could get. Arms spread, you let Dazai A pull you into a hug so you can give him a proper welcome home kiss. “Both of you are obnoxious. Is that all I’m worth? Half a sheet of cookies?”

“Half a sheet of your cookies,” Dazai B grins. “That’s not something either of us would give up lightly.” The other Dazai nods in agreement.

Both of your stupid, annoying, clingy boyfriends tug on your sleeves, forcing you over to the couch so they can both receive your affections while the cookies bake.

the timer goes off after a while but they both whine about not wanting to let u get up. once you threaten letting the cookies burn they're quick to let go. i hate them both.

hi hello i dreamt of you today and just wanna tell you that ily stay safe have fun

YOU DREAMT OF ME????? anon hi.... hi anon hi....

TYSM ILYT ALSO HAVE FUN AND ALSO STAY SAFE OMG!!!!!

no return

dazai osamu / reader + ??? / reader

notes: mild yandere themes, u drink alcohol, inspired by the manhwa 'a false confession' (massive rec hehe) drabble..? oneshot..? i don't know what to call this since it's not really fleshed out and not given that much thought so maybe its just a random blurb hahaha not proofread i just click post and never look back thats just how i am

the moment you step into the balcony, your legs almost gave out. your hand having to lean on the vine ornamented pillar as support. stillness draping over despite the festivity just behind the door.

just a few feet beyond you, stood your senior. even with your vision hazy and eyes half lidded, you think you can see his silhouette leaning over the railings, his back turned against you, coat billowing in the wind, tousling the hair of his that you've always wanted to tuck behind his ear.

he looks particularly different, today.

the man of your affections — whose hands that are always resting upon your shoulders, his touch lingering a far too much for someone who is only concerned about his coworker, muttering words of 'good job!' every time he looks over your computer to see the progress of the report he assigned.

he, who is always eager to bring you trinkets of all kinds after being assigned in a case, and if you had the ability similar to his, you would've caught on the fact that the trinkets are always given by him personally, rather than your unfortunate coworkers whose gifts are left in their desks.

yet frown would replace your previous smile once he pulls away with a pat; when you remember that everyone got the same gift as you did.

(oh, how you lamented every second that passes without him knowing how you felt.)

but that will change tonight — your intoxicated self decided to confess your long time admiration for your senior. 'and if he rejects your love, then you can just say that you were too drunk! it's easy!' tanizaki said so, as he handed you an alcoholic drink, and you shouldn't have trusted any words that comes out of the orange haired mans mouth.

even if the others knew how bad you felt about him, you prefer to believe that you could keep your feelings to yourself.

with a determination only a drunken one can have, you step further away from the loud music of the party and towards the man.

a heavy breath escapes your lips as you stand just a few feet behind him.

"sir," you first regard him with his title you've always used during work, and a part of you wonders if you'll be able to call him endearments you've always wanted to say after he accepts your confession.

you don't think you can look at him right now.

"i've been thinking about this a lot," you begin, hushed but nonetheless made for him to hear. "i, don't know if, i should really say this…" your eyes drift down to your feet, deliberating whether you should beat around the bush.

but you know you can't, this feelings of yours is too much; if you don't get to say it now, what will become of your sentiments? locked behind a glass heart that threatened to burst every time he's near?

"i really, really like you, sir." you finally say, your hands harshly gripping the sides of your clothes, scrunching them, wrinkles beginning to form on the flimsy fabric.

you refuse to meet his gaze.

silence ensues, the only sound heard; the loud rustling of the leaves against themselves.

"..."

ah, to think that you get rejected without even him saying anything.

"why?" he asks, then a hope ignites deep inside you.

"i just, really like it when you treat us kindly, you always go out your way to make sure i'm okay, your dedication to the agency is admirable, and i... just really like everything about you…"

"that's what any superior would do..." he replies coldly.

his words does not even travel first to your ears — it travels straight to your heart, so harshly that if it traveled to your ears first, you're certain you'd go deaf.

you stagger, the adrenaline the alcohol provided leaving your system.

then, he grabs your arm just in time, his bandaged hand surprisingly holding you delicately, as if he expects you to be gone once he pulls away.

"osamu. call me osamu, not sir." he says tenderly as he rests his hand on your shoulder, his arms coiling around you like a snake to a branch.

you smile gently as you bury your head in his chest. you can smell the faint scent of alcohol on his shirt, how strange, you've always thought he smell more like the sweets he'd always insist on eating. "osa—" the remaining syllables does not leave your tongue.

he rests his head on your shoulders, his curly coffee-like locks of hair tickling your neck.

osamu?

your eyes drift to his neck — are those bandages?

coffee-like?

dread fills your veins. dazai pulls back, your drunken haze along with it, finally able to look at him properly. his warm palm rests on your jaw. the dull brown eyes you’ve grown fearful of seems to reflect the stars, looking at you so, lovingly.

you don’t know what you’re supposed to be surprised of, the fact that a coworker whom you are scared of is looking at you softly, or the fact that he just accepted a confession that wasn’t meant to be his.

"should we keep our relationship a secret?" he asks with deceptive bashfulness.

--

"sir..?" you stammer as you try to look in ranpo's viridescent eyes for an answer to why he's holding your hand tightly.

"i've always thought that you…" his brows are knitted, refusing to meet your eyes, his own narrowed as he looks at the bracelet that adorns your wrist, an item begrudgingly accepted from dazai.

(he wonders if you would be mad if he forcibly ripped its beads out of you.)

he clicked his tongue at his own thoughts, shuffling to get a comfortable spot where he rested appropriately on his office chair.

"since when were you both close?"

The cool, marble countertops send a shiver up your spine, but you don't seem to care. Instead of complaints, a giggle leaves your mouth, hands tightening around Dazai's shoulders. Feeling him scoop you up and set you onto the kitchen counter so easily made you swoon, which only deepened the make out session you two were currently engaged in. His hands kept moving from your hips to your ass, wanting to feel your body under his fingers as he held you close.

You both couldn't help giggling, feeling giddy at the touches and kisses being shared during such early hours. Pajama shorts riding up your thighs, a stretched-out and loose t-shirt showing off Dazai's bare neck and collar bones... it was all so intimate. There was no one around, just the two of you and the early morning sun dancing across the room as your legs moved up to cage Dazai in. More giggles erupted from him before pulling back, cutely flushed cheeks on display for just you to see. No words were shared, just heavy breaths and loving stares as your brains worked on properly waking up.

“Y’know, maybe I should skip work today.”

“You said the same thing yesterday, Osamu.”

jinshi..... you get it.....

LMAOOO i try 🙂‍↕️

deer do not you ever EVER apologize for not working on requests 🗣️

get better soon

-🩵

thank uuuu 🩵anon! i'm sleeping a lot and eating a lot of soup 💪🏻 so hopefully ill be back at peak performance soon 🫡

Atsushi Nakajima masterlist bsd masterlist main masterlist

Doormat reader ft. Dazai, Nikolai, Ranpo, Chuuya

the way u write is so cute so lovely so sweet i am so in love !!

OMGGG TY!!!! omg im blushing tysm 🙈🙈 im glad you enjoy!!!!

my hope in hell (dazai x you)

warnings; drug usage

tags; fluff, crush, reader has an ability

Dazai had it all planned out-- the only issue was a certain bird with wings that spanned far and wide, i.e., your teleportation ability. He knew you'd try to use it when the bombing would take place, to save your client, but he couldn't have you doing that. It was just a tiny notch in the belt he brushed aside, underestimating the reason he was going through the trouble to keep you out, even though your presence wouldn't exactly prevent it.

It was to keep you safe.

But he wouldn't admit it to himself. You weren't a part of the Agency, you weren't a civilian in need of protection, you weren't a close friend, you were just someone he'd come to know. The plan was, Atsushi would use the stealth of his ability to chloroform you and deliver you to where Dazai was, overlooking the plan and controlling the strings, post which he'd keep an eye- and a touch- on you to prevent you from interfering. He'd have preferred to do it himself, but he knew you'd just teleport away if you saw him approach. 

"Teleportation... what a bothersome ability." He murmured, as he almost snatched your unconscious form from his coworker's shoulder, slightly irritated by the way you were being carried around like a sack of potatoes*, holding you in his arms instead. He closed the door with his foot as he sat down on the sofa, leaning against the arm to keep you on his lap. It's because I need to be touching them to use my ability. Yes, that's it.

But he found himself being severely distracted by that peaceful face, not being able to tear his eyes away. You were still in his arms, your shoulders being held up by his left and your knees by his right, which he removed to brush the hair off your face. You were so mesmerizing to him, the person who had resisted his plan, fought with him at every step, his anti-thesis, looking so delicate under him. He could feel his heart beat faster, but frowned as he realised he was not controlling it. A strange feeling crossed his stomach as his fingers ran slowly across your forehead. Time seemed to stop, and so did his racing thoughts. He didn't even deduce that the tickling sensation might wake you up as your eyes fluttered open.

"Osamu?" You spoke weakly without thinking.

My name. You said my first name.

The pacing of his heart seemed to get faster making him wonder what you did to him, as he gathered his thoughts again to respond. "You're awake." It wasn't like him to respond so stupidly. Of course you were awake. Was this love? He thought about the moments between you two, and in retrospect, the feeling they left him with. It wasn't the thrill of meeting an enemy, it was the giddyness of a crush. You were a mystery to him, the way you gave him a warm kindness despite him meaning nothing to you, politely rejecting his attempts of flirting, and most of all-- being genuinely concerned about him. What drove him to develop that affection for you, he realised, was your unconditional kindness to him hidden with a snarky attitude. It was at that moment, he realised he wanted you, and it was a little different from the way he 'wanted' anyone else he flirted with, he just... wanted your affections to save him, to pull him out of the wish to die, he wanted to feel whatever he felt when he was with you for longer. Your eyes were still droopy from the effects of the chloroform and you found it a little hard to move, finding the look on Dazai's face a little more confusing.

"Don't worry, you'll feel a bit out of it for a while till the drugs wear off."

That seemed to concern you. "You drugged me?" You spoke through struggled breaths. Not once did his eyes leave yours, making you even more uneasy.

"We can't have you teleporting to your client."

You sighed in relief. "Oh, so that's what this is about." You attempted to get up, being assisted by Dazai, who still kept you close, feeling a little disappointed as you shifted your legs off his.

He frowned, more disheartened you'd think that of him. He'd been an arguably respectful guy to most since his mafia days, ignoring all the official complaints against his flirting. "What kind of person do you take me for?"

"The worst kind." You shot him a look, feeling more and more awake by the second. "And you could keep me at physical contact at an arms length too."

"Oh, right. Sorry." He realised, allowing to you keep a little more distance, holding only your hand tightly, feeling himself lose his breath slightly like some sort of a schoolgirl when you lightly held it back.

"So, my client is in danger, huh?"

"Perhaps." He replied, keeping his usual cool smirk on his face, slightly faltering when you smiled back at him.

"Here I was thinking the Agency wouldn't just let people die."

"He's not going to die." He assured you, "but we need him slightly injured to set some things in motion."

"Slightly?" You caught on to his little white lie. Dazai seemed slightly impressed by you, his smirk turning into a genuine laugh.

"Well, I can't really tell my enemy all my secrets."

You didn't respond to that, simply looking away with a sigh. "I guess this time, I failed."

Part of him wanted to comfort you-- scratch that, an overwhelming majority of him felt compelled to comfort you, and so he did, scooting a little closer to you and still maintaining a respectful distance, just to put a hand on your shoulder. To his surprise, you returned the gesture by hugging him, shoving your face in his chest and holding his shoulders. He moved to wrap his arms around your waist, slightly embarrassed you could definitely hear his heart thumping. "I'm... sorry." He patted your head, wanting to kiss it as well, but he knew it would make the moment awkward if you didn't feel the same way. He was satisfied just comforting you, suppressing his feelings if he had to, for being around you took away his ability to strategize. He'd make plans to get you later, he just wanted to enjoy that moment.

"Can you get me a glass of water, please?" You asked softly, letting go of his shoulders, and looking up at him with tired eyes. Eyes just like his. 

"Of course." He said instinctively, getting up from the couch, suddenly realising what the hell he just did. You let out an incredulous laugh seeing his panicked face turn right back around, trying to grab a hold before you could get away. But you were much faster, teleporting to where your client would be before his touch could get you.

Dazai, for the first time in years, felt utterly and entirely thrilled, chuckling to himself as he realised the plan was ruined. He'd have to find another way to carry out the operation. He sat down on the couch, holding his head in his hands, not entirely out of frustration of being fooled by a beautiful tempter, but from how easily he let himself be tricked by you. 

"Atsushi." He spoke into his pager. "Call off the bomb."

"What?! What happened?"

"Change of plans."

*- sorry i laughed so hard